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silja in xculturalfamily

Let's talk family gatherings/ holiday get-togethers

For many religions and cultures, it's the holiday season. I'd love to hear some of the differences you have encountered in how your own and adopted cultures celebrate- I don't mean Christian vs Muslim festivals or whatever, but cultural differences in different countries for family get-togethers, especially around the holiday season.

For example, where I am from (Switzerland/ Ireland), you would meet up with family, but it would usually only be for either a meal or for a few drinks afterwards- the get-together usually would not last longer than a few hours. Also, it would usually only be close family (siblings, grandparents if alive), and on another day maybe aunts and uncles from one side of the family, then another day aunts and uncles from the other side of the family... so you may end up with 4 or 5 days of celebrations, but each only lasting a few hours, all being in different houses, and rarely more than 12-16 people. Now, I am in the USA; we live in Arkansas, as does one of DH's (who is from here) sister and brothers. But we are all driving up to South Dakota (10+ hours drive, me heavily pregnant and with 21 months old twin toddlers) to his parents, where there will be some 40+ people for Thanksgiving. Even if we meet up here locally, the start of the gathering would be before dinner (which is always late), then for dinner and then games and stuff after, until late into the night.
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With my family, we're pretty traditional. The smallest gathering is about 10 people. The largest is 30. My husband's father is an only child and my mother-in-law doesn't talk to her family, so we have ZERO family. Since I moved to his country to be with him, I often feel so lonely. My husband's family never really does anything special for holidays (which is rare here), so they're always asking me "What do you do at these family gatherings??" I was like, "We just talk and eat." And they're like, "What do you talk about??" UGHhhhhhhhh...nevermind, I give up! lol

So, I guess I really just miss having a big family meal.
WOW! 40 people! That's a lot! My grandmother refuses to do anything over 10 because the year before last like 30 people came and she said it was just TOO much insanity. I think it's fun, but if I were you, I'd have to cancel. There will be many Thanksgivings to come (where you WON'T be pregnant).
For Thanksgiving, we decided not to make a big trip up to see family since we're going at Christmas. Sorry you had to endure such a drive while pregnant!

Usually, at Thanksgiving we get together at 1pm to eat and then hang around until at least 4pm watching sports, talking and napping. Same thing for Christmas, but there is also time for presents. Anywhere from 10-30 people usually.

In Greece, only some of the extended family came over for Christmas dinner as there would be too many to fit otherwise! It was probably 20 people or less, and they cook a ton of food. Everyone just stays for the meal and then goes home after a couple hours.

In Greece for Christmas and New Year's, all the family members with kids would bring them carolling to their relatives' houses. The kids sing a song and get some money. Then they might chat for a few minutes before moving to the next house.