PinnedThe Onion@TheOnionNov 14, 2024Your generosity enables the continued growth of our ruthless media empire. Join us at membership.theonion.com/?campaign=701a…4294292842842.6K2.6K1M1M
The Onion@TheOnionJan 15“It’s really hard to focus on work when you spent the previous night getting railed by Steely in Franco Harris’ living room,” Peter Hayward said Vivid Sex Dream About Steely McBeam AgainFrom theonion.com1301304242456456186K186K
The Onion@TheOnionJan 15The Onion’s Exclusive Interview With The Stars Of ‘Heated Rivalry’ theonion.com/the-onions-exc…58582392394K4K478K478K
The Onion@TheOnionJan 14Shop at The Onion store. It's not like anything else has made you happy. store.theonion.com/products/carto…57573131134134145K145K
The Onion@TheOnionJan 14Cryptic New Laundry Room Rule Hints At Tale Of Bizarre Infraction Cryptic New Laundry Room Rule Hints At Tale Of Bizarre InfractionFrom theonion.com28287474440440125K125K
The Onion@TheOnionJan 14Report: NHL Actually Has Had Hundreds Of Openly Gay Players For Years Report: NHL Actually Has Had Hundreds Of Openly Gay Players For YearsFrom theonion.com28283535368368108K108K
The Onion@TheOnionJan 14Vivid Sex Dream About Steely McBeam Again Vivid Sex Dream About Steely McBeam AgainFrom theonion.com11111919221221104K104K
The Onion@TheOnionJan 14Spencer Pratt Announces Run For L.A. Mayor theonion.com/spencer-pratt-…10101818211211101K101K
The Onion@TheOnionJan 14Wild-Eyed Andy Cohen Announces ‘The Real Housewives Of My Attic' Wild-Eyed Andy Cohen Announces ‘The Real Housewives Of My Attic’From theonion.com1111252527727792K92K
The Onion@TheOnionJan 14This is not a paid advertisement. Subscribe at membership.theonion.com to receive the newspaper and see more print-exclusive content.1515636337537599K99K
The Onion@TheOnionJan 14Powerful Bidet Blasts Hole Clean Through Man Powerful Bidet Blasts Hole Clean Through ManFrom theonion.com71712362363.7K3.7K309K309K
The Onion@TheOnionJan 14God Admits Imitation Crab Tastes Just As Good God Admits Imitation Crab Tastes Just As GoodFrom theonion.com1313686868868881K81K
The Onion@TheOnionJan 14Girlfriend's Dad Pretty Hot Girlfriend's Dad Pretty HotFrom theonion.com12123333481481100K100K