Pinned
i was a
drunk cig
and he wanted
a line
- It's New Year's Eve! That means Elmo gets to stay up late. YES! YES! YES! YES!
- hello sharks i’m asking for $48 so i can do a hostile take over of a dive bars’ touchtunes
- him: my bracket is ruined 🙁 me tryna hit: NOOOOOO 😭😭😭😭😭😞😞😞😭😭😭😭😭😞😞😭😭😭😥😥😭😭😭
- the cure to male loneliness is to stop being a piece of shit
- making out is so unappreciated, we need to make out more. make america make out again
- hope the 69ers win
- god forbid i rob a 7-11Club close at 2am…. She get home at 4am 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩
- this guy i went to college with told me he had heard a rumor that i had a three way with football players and i was like that’s crazy i would never do that (i did) like ever (twice)
- sorry i didn’t text you back babe i was busy tripping all the kids at the brewery
