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Diana Thirst
@rlycalm
all-time mind winner
PNW
Joined February 2019
846
Following
20.1K
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  • user avatar
    Diana Thirst
    @rlycalm
    Nov 15, 2022
    As an engineer at Twitter, I can confirm that Elon Musk doesn’t understand anything about our website, or coding in general. Not gonna lie, we laugh REALLY hard about it behind his back. We’ve been calling him “the CEO,” but it stands for Code Efficiency 0.
    Readers added context they thought people might want to knowReaders added context
    "diana thirst" (@rlycalm) is a satirical account. "A person claiming to be a Twitter engineer ... who goes by Diana Thirst on Twitter, is a comedian who has been known to post similarly outlandish things before ..." dailydot.com/debug/twitter-… In their own words: "I write satire!" twitter.com/rlycalm/status…
    Context is written by people who use X, and appears when rated helpful by others. Find out more.
  • user avatar
    Diana Thirst
    @rlycalm
    May 3, 2025
    I don’t know anything about your favorite streamers, and do not understand why everyone is into that stuff, but i observe that the muscular gentleman with glasses was both less mad and more knowledgeable than the sickly bald man
    3.8M
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    Diana Thirst
    @rlycalm
    Apr 4, 2022
    It’s 2028, I’m in my Amazon mood boost booth, injecting Amazon speed as I pee in Amazon relief briefs. I check my rebreather mask & quickly type “i love president bezos” into Twitla (elon musk twitter) via my Amazon work-social portal. I get 800 epics, which I exchange for oxygen
  • user avatar
    Diana Thirst
    @rlycalm
    Aug 15, 2024
    Important
    00:00
    1.3M
  • user avatar
    Diana Thirst
    @rlycalm
    Jan 27, 2024
    “We see you ordered fried rice. What if you added 1 gallon of tea and a personal stroker” like planning my night for me
    1.4M
  • user avatar
    Diana Thirst
    @rlycalm
    Nov 10, 2021
    Wow, hate to admit it, but this Twitter Blue thing actually sounds like a pretty good deal
  • user avatar
    Diana Thirst
    @rlycalm
    Jan 30, 2022
    Man what the hell
  • user avatar
    Diana Thirst
    @rlycalm
    Aug 15, 2019
    i feel like im talking to the borg
  • user avatar
    Diana Thirst
    @rlycalm
    Jun 15, 2025
    WOKE ME UP INSIDE
    user avatar
    State of the Scene
    @SOTSPodcast
    Jun 14, 2025
    Amy Lee (Evanescence) joins in the No Kings protests currently being held across the country.
    759K
  • user avatar
    Diana Thirst
    @rlycalm
    Jul 11, 2024
    Look at my president dawg we’re going to die
    643K
  • user avatar
    Diana Thirst
    @rlycalm
    Sep 13, 2025
    One time in like 2018 my best friend and i made a group chat about movies with just us and Charlie Kirk, and he never left it
    user avatar
    Charlie Kirk
    Turning Point USA
    @charliekirk11
    Jan 6, 2014
    The movie "UP" is literally my least favorite movie of all time. #TURNITOFF
    682K
  • user avatar
    Diana Thirst
    @rlycalm
    Feb 7, 2021
    “AOC is not your friend” “podcasters are not your friends” lol ok
  • user avatar
    Diana Thirst
    @rlycalm
    Apr 6, 2021
    one time my friend told me her boyfriend said he is haunted by a ghost and i was like wow what and she was like yeah, it leaves all these scratch marks down his back
  • user avatar
    Diana Thirst
    @rlycalm
    Aug 27, 2024
    423K