PinnedThe Onion@TheOnionNov 14, 2024Your generosity enables the continued growth of our ruthless media empire. Join us at membership.theonion.com/?campaign=701a…4274272832832.6K2.6K1M1M
The Onion@TheOnionJan 15“It’s really hard to focus on work when you spent the previous night getting railed by Steely in Franco Harris’ living room,” Peter Hayward said Vivid Sex Dream About Steely McBeam AgainFrom theonion.com1271274141447447182K182K
The Onion@TheOnionJan 15The Onion’s Exclusive Interview With The Stars Of ‘Heated Rivalry’ theonion.com/the-onions-exc…58582392394K4K475K475K
The Onion@TheOnionJan 14Shop at The Onion store. It's not like anything else has made you happy. store.theonion.com/products/carto…57573232134134143K143K
The Onion@TheOnionJan 14Cryptic New Laundry Room Rule Hints At Tale Of Bizarre Infraction Cryptic New Laundry Room Rule Hints At Tale Of Bizarre InfractionFrom theonion.com27277272431431123K123K
The Onion@TheOnionJan 14Report: NHL Actually Has Had Hundreds Of Openly Gay Players For Years Report: NHL Actually Has Had Hundreds Of Openly Gay Players For YearsFrom theonion.com26263535361361106K106K
The Onion@TheOnionJan 14Vivid Sex Dream About Steely McBeam Again Vivid Sex Dream About Steely McBeam AgainFrom theonion.com11111919216216103K103K
The Onion@TheOnionJan 14Spencer Pratt Announces Run For L.A. Mayor theonion.com/spencer-pratt-…10101616204204100K100K
The Onion@TheOnionJan 14Wild-Eyed Andy Cohen Announces ‘The Real Housewives Of My Attic' Wild-Eyed Andy Cohen Announces ‘The Real Housewives Of My Attic’From theonion.com1111242427427490K90K
The Onion@TheOnionJan 14This is not a paid advertisement. Subscribe at membership.theonion.com to receive the newspaper and see more print-exclusive content.1313616137237298K98K
The Onion@TheOnionJan 14Powerful Bidet Blasts Hole Clean Through Man Powerful Bidet Blasts Hole Clean Through ManFrom theonion.com71712322323.7K3.7K308K308K
The Onion@TheOnionJan 14God Admits Imitation Crab Tastes Just As Good God Admits Imitation Crab Tastes Just As GoodFrom theonion.com1212686868468480K80K
The Onion@TheOnionJan 14Girlfriend's Dad Pretty Hot Girlfriend's Dad Pretty HotFrom theonion.com1212333347247299K99K