"i wanna be the person i needed when i was her ageโ
I hear other adults who also suffered as kids talk about how we want to be the person we needed when we were young. And it is beginning to dawn on me that on the other side of that choice are the people who needed someone, didnโt have that person, and instead of choosing to be that person when they grew up, they chose to perpetuate cruelty and selfishness.
And they act like they are tough and strong and powerful because they donโt let anything get to them โฆ but thatโs all a lie they tell themselves.
The truth is, theyโre weak and afraid.And when they canโt sleep at night, they know it. And the scariest thing in their reality, the thing they will run from their entire lives, is that they will be found out and exposed.
It takes courage and strength, vulnerability and dedication to be the person you needed, because when you are that person for someone else, part of you remembers and relives that you never had that. The people who choose indifference or cruelty arenโt strong or courageous enough to allow themselves to feel that pain all over again, so they just inflict it on others. They know theyโre weak, they know that beneath the mask they are afraid. So all they have is cruelty, which is honestly the easiest thing in the world. Itโs the path of least resistance for the people of least courage.
Being cruel is so boring. Itโs lazy. Anyone can be cruel. It takes real hard work to be kind.
Make the choice to be the person you needed, and commit to doing the work. Practice it, and break the cycle.
