St. Patrick's Day is on Monday, March 17. In the name of all things Irish, we’ve gathered a collection of Paddy-licious St. Patrick’s Day puns that we think are going to shamrock your world. Or, at the very least, deliver a laugh or two. Just ahead, you'll find a total gold mine of clever one-liners and corny jokes to use however you see fit.
Need a beer pun to accompany an Instagram post of you and your laddies or lassies enjoying a pint on St. Paddy's? The family enjoying corned beef and cabbage? No worries, you'll find just what you need in the collection below. And, trust us, whichever of these inspired puns you choose, it's sure to get ale, er, all the laughs.
If you've noticed all the bad-but-good puns we've thrown in to celebrate St. Patrick's Day, beware, because there are plenty more where those came from. After all, what's St. Paddy's without soda bread, a glass of Guinness and a tongue-in-cheek pun that's — wait for it — lager than life?
We've also included some of our favorite Irish-inspired dad jokes to get your eyes a-smiling, like: What do leprechauns put on their decks? Paddy O’ furniture, of course.
Feel free to groan because these St. Patrick's Puns are way over the top (of the morning), but that's exactly the point. So, read on, and without further ado, let's get this paddy started!
Happy St. Patrick's Day puns
- Wishing you a St. Paddy's that's clover the moon!
- Irish I was Irish.
- I'm lucky and I gnome it.
- Drinking of you this St. Patrick's Day!
- I'm head clover heels for you.
- I'm giving you the green light to have a happy St. Paddy's.
- The grass is always greener on St. Patrick's Day.
- Officially a gold digger.
- Have your-elf a merry little St. Paddy's.
- It's St. Patrick's Day, go a little cloverboard.
- Suffering from Dublin vision.
- Tell me, what's wrong with this pitcher?
- I've got no elf control.
- You've got fight for your right to paaaaaddy.
- Dublin down on this St. Patrick's Day celebration!
- I'm here to paddy.
- Will you be my Pinch Charming?
- Irish I was at the pub right now.
- I mustache you to have a very happy St. Patrick's Day.
- Lucky you!
- Ale's well that ends well.
- I've got déjà brew.
- Bad Irish puns are just how eye roll.
- Hoppy St. Patrick's Day!
- Hope this St. Patrick's Day bowls you clover.
- You're off your sham-rocker.
Funny St. Patrick's Day puns
- Irish you a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.
- I only have ice for you.
- Party until the pint of no return.
- Don't be elfish, share your pint!
- Feelin' lucky right meow and I'm not kitten around.
- Distill my beating heart.
- Take a pitcher, it'll last longer.
- Irish I may, Irish I might ...
- Keep calm and leprechaun.
- Irish you a very Happy St. Patrick's Day!
- I'm lager than life.
- The jig is up!
- You put me to Seamus.
- Between a shamrock and a hard place.
- I've hit shamrock bottom.
- Happy St. Paddy's to someone who's worth their weight in gold.
- I was going to get you shamrock tie for St. Paddy's, but decided to get you a rain bow instead.
- I am so clover it.
Short St. Patrick's Day puns
- It's time to get this paddy started.
- Who's your paddy?
- It ain't over until it's clover.
- I'm the life of the paddy.
- Ale in a day's work.
- You're worth your weight in gold.
- Irish you were beer.
- Ain't that a Seamus?
- Shamrock and roll.
- Ale that glitters is gold.
- You're really clover.
- You're my lucky charm.
- You shamrock my world.
- Life is brew-tiful.
- Don't worry, beer happy.
- May the luck be with you.
- Irish you knew how much I loved you.
- Don't push your luck.
Irish puns
- What did one Irish cap say to the other? You go on ahead.
- Where do you find leprechauns on St. Patrick's Day? It depends on where you left them.
- Other than corned beef, what's the best thing to eat on St. Paddy's? Answer: A paddy melt.
- Why did St. Patrick drive all the snakes out of Ireland? He couldn't get them all on a plane.
- Which instrument isn't very modest? The brag-pipe.
- Why did the leprechaun skip dinner? He already had a pot of gold.
- Why do leprechauns recycle? They like to go green.
- Why do leprechauns drink Guinness? Because they are pint-sized.
- What's a leprechaun's favorite song? "Somewhere Over the Rainbow."
- Why did the leprechaun quit his job? He kept getting short-changed.
- What kind of potatoes aren’t Irish? French fries.
- How can you tell if an Irishman likes your puns? He’s Dublin over in laughter.
- How do Irish zombies greet each other? Top of the moanin’ to you!
- What do horses wear for good luck? Shoes.
- How do you make gold soup? Add 14 karots.
- Why shouldn’t you iron four-leaf clovers? It’s not good to press your luck.
- What do ghosts drink on St. Paddy’s Day? Boo’s.
- What do you call a four-leaf clover with poison ivy? A rash of good luck.
- What kind of bow can't be tied? A rainbow.
- What kind of spells do leprechauns use? Lucky charms.
- What happens when four-leaf clovers get jealous? They turn green with envy.
- Where can you always find gold on St. Patrick's Day? In the dictionary.
- What's long, green and only comes once a year? The St. Patrick's Day parade.
- Why do people wear shamrocks on St. Patrick's Day? Because real rocks are too heavy.
- What's the best month for a parade? March.
- Why did the Irishmen stop searching for gold? It didn't pan out.
- What does Ireland have more than anyone else? Irishmen.
Leprechaun puns
- What do leprechauns use to clean the toilet? Mr. Green.
- What did one leprechaun say to the other? Let's take an elfie.
- Why aren't leprechauns barbers? They just don't cut it.
- What dog breed is a leprechaun's favorite? Golden retriever.
- What are leprechaun's such good gardeners? They have green thumbs.
- Why did one leprechaun break up with the other? She discovered he was a gold digger.
- How do leprechauns get to the moon? On sham-rockets.
- How do you know when leprechauns are fighting? They give each other the gold shoulder.
- Where do police put misbehaving leprechauns? The paddy wagon.
- Why aren't leprechauns doctors? They don't have the patience.
- What position do leprechauns play in baseball? Shortstop.
- Why did the leprechaun quit working at the muffler factory? It was exhausting.
- What's a leprechaun's favorite dance? The Shamrock Shake.
- Why do leprechauns argue a lot? They're short-tempered.
- Why are leprechauns shoemakers? They have sole.
- What do leprechauns drink in the morning? Irish coffee.
- What do you call leprechauns who pretend to love music? Sham rockers.
- Why couldn't the leprechaun pay rent? He was a little short.
- What did the teacher say to the leprechaun after he was caught cheating? Seamus on you.
- What do leprechauns put on top of presents? Rainbows.
- Why did the leprechaun study environmental science? He wanted to go green.
- What happens when leprechauns drink too much? They get lucked up.
- What do leprechauns put on their decks? Paddy O' furniture.
- Why do leprechauns make good secretaries? They know shorthand.
- Why did the leprechaun climb over the rainbow? To get to the other side.
- How did the leprechaun win the race? He took a shortcut.
- Why did the leprechaun read a self-help book? He had low elf-esteem.
- How do you hire a leprechaun? Put him on a ladder.
- Did you hear about the leprechaun who took a bus home after leaving the pub? He had to return it the next day.
- What do you get when you cross a leprechaun with Jolly Ol' St. Nick? St. O' Claus.
- What do you call it when two leprechauns have a conversation? Small talk.
- Did you hear about the leprechaun who went to jail? Now he's a lepre-con.
- Where do leprechauns play baseball? In the little league.
- How do leprechauns pay for doctor visits? They have elf care.
- Why did the leprechaun cross the road? It was the chicken's day off.
- What do leprechauns grill on St. Patrick's Day? Short ribs.
