Conflict Management &

Resolution
Course Objectives
 At the end of this course, students are expected to
demonstrate understanding of the meaning and concept of
conflict resolution
 Explain the skills required for Conflict resolution
 Discuss the steps involve in various forms of conflict resolution
 Explain the theories and models of Conflict resolution
 Discuss the effect of destructive conflict resolution behaviours
 Discuss the positive effect of learning conflict resolution skills
Introduction

 Conflict cannot be avoided entirely

 We sometimes confuse good relations with approval,
shared values and avoiding disagreements (Brown and
Fisher, 1988)
 A major factor in marital dissatisfaction is the inability to
listen and resolve conflict productively
 Company executives and middle managers spend twenty-
five percent of their time dealing with interpersonal
conflict (Borisoff & Victor, 1998).
Introduction
 However, conflict can be seen as:
• An opportunity for creativity,
• Growth
• Learning

 Instead of:
• Pain and
• Humiliation

 Reframe of conflict helps to avoid ineffective ways of

dealing with conflict
 (Brown & Fisher, 1988; Borisoff & Victor, 1998; Coulson, 1996; De Dreu &
Van De Vliert, 1997; Kottler, 1994).
Definition
 Conflict comes from the Latin word conflictus,
 Meaning the act of striking together
 The first meaning Webster gives for conflict is fight, battle,
war.
 The second meaning listed is "competitive or opposing action
of incompatibles:
• Antagonistic state or action (as of divergent ideas, interests, or persons)
• Mental struggle resulting from incompatible or opposing needs, drives,
wishes, or external or internal demands
• The synonym is discord
 (Miriam-Webster, 1998).
Definition
 Meaning of Resolution:
 The act or process of reducing to simpler form as
in "the act of analyzing a complex notion into
simpler ones
• The act of answering
• Solving
• The act of determining
• The synonym is courage.
 (Miriam-Webster, 1998)
Concept
 The concept of conflict resolution can be thought to
encompass the use of nonviolent resistance measures by
conflicted parties in an attempt to promote effective
resolution. Conflict resolution models have common goals
because they seek to:
 Create opportunities
 Recognize that conflict is a natural part of life and that it
can be resolved peacefully
 Develop awareness of their own unique responses to
conflict and to understand the diversity with which others
respond
 Learn and practice the principles of conflict resolution and
the skills of peaceful problem-solving processes
 Empower themselves to be individually and cooperatively
responsible for resolving conflicts peacefully. Integrate this
responsibility in their daily lives.
Concept
 An authentic conflict resolution program contains two
key elements:
• The principles of conflict resolution
 Separate the people from the problem
 Focus on interests
 Not positions
 Invent options for mutual gain
 Use objective criteria as the basis of decision-making)
• A problem-solving process
 Negotiation
 Mediation
 Consensus decision making
 (Crawford & Bodine, 1997).
Concept

 Other Terms Use in Conflict Resolution:

 Negotiation:
o Negotiation is the bargaining that takes
place directly between two or more parties
who are in conflict.

Mediation:
o Mediation uses a neutral third party to
facilitate conflict resolution, assisting the
parties to understand and negotiate with one
another.
Concept
 Other Terms Use in Conflict Resolution:
 Arbitration:
• Arbitration is resorting to calling in a third party to hear
both sides of the conflict and impose a decision that
both parties agree to abide by.

 Arbitration differs from mediation in that in mediation the

resolution of the conflict remains in the hands of those in
conflict. In arbitration the conflicted parties have given
up their right to find a solution to a third party.

 Litigation:
• Litigation occurs when the conflict is brought before
the court system for a decision that is legally binding
Conflict Resolution Skills

 Conflict resolution is a counseling skill

 (Ivy, 1994; Haley, 1976; Pearce, 1996).

 Counselors are in a unique place to both promote

conflict resolution skills and use counseling skills
while practicing conflict resolution for longer
lasting and therapeutic resolutions.
 Two environments in which counselors have been
especially active regarding conflict resolution have
been in the church, and in the family.
 (Moore, 1996).
Conflict Resolution Skills
 Skills used in counseling are the skills used in conflict resolution.
They include:
• Building rapport
• Active listening
• Observation of non-verbals
• Awareness of systems
• Reframing
• Self-control
• Awareness of meta-communications
• Anxiety reduction
• Escalation and de-escalation of emotional intensity
• Searching for things held in common
• Defining differences
• Looking for positive intentions
• Allowing to save face, and defining needs and wants, all with the intention of
increasing understanding and facilitating communication between those
involved in the conflict
Steps Involve in Conflict Resolution
Both the structure and the skills involved in conflict resolution are similar to
those use in counseling.

Although exact conflict resolution steps vary, the general procedure follows.

 The parties in conflict agree to try and work things out

 Tell the truth. Refrain from interrupting or hurting each other . Each side tells
his or her story

 To check out that the story was correctly heard and to validate the sender,
either the mediator or the other person involved in the dispute repeats what
they heard

 Then the other disputant tells his or her story and gets validated in the same
way

 Once the stories are told, solutions are sought that continue to validate both
parties in the conflict.

 Once a possible solution is agreed to, it is put into action and evaluated for
effectiveness and revised as needed
Steps Involve in Mediation
 Moore (1983) has identified twelve tasks that he feels the mediator must
generally perform in a negotiation. The are:

 Making initial contacts with parties, which includes establishing credibility,

rapport, and informed commitment to the process; Assisting the parties in
assessing how well their needs will be met by various modes of conflict
resolution;

 Gathering relevant information about the people, dynamics, and substance of

a dispute; Identifying strategies that will help adversaries move toward
agreement; Softening the impacts of strong emotions and correcting
misperceptions and poor communication;

 Assisting parties to distinguish and focus on genuine issues in dispute;

Narrowing the issues and establishing the order in which issues will be
discussed; Shifting parties from positional bargaining to a problem-solving
approach;

 Identifying a variety of substantive, procedural, and psychological settlement

options; Applying evaluation criteria to potential settlement options; Aiding
parties to reach final substantive and procedural agreements; and

 Designing procedures to implement decisions, monitor

Steps Involve in Divorce Mediation
 Kessler (1978) identifies a four-phase approach to
mediation, involving:
 The introductory behavior of establishing ground
rules and rapport,
 Issue definition,
 Issue processing, and
 Settlement implementation
Steps Involve in Divorce Mediation
 Haynes (1978, 1982.) argues that the process of
divorce mediation includes
 Referral, Intake and orientation,
 Budget development,
 Reconciliation of budgetary needs,
 Identification of assets,
 Identification of potential goals, Clarification of issues,
 Ranking the order of issues,
 Identification of options, Bargaining,
 Drafting the memorandum of understanding, and
 Consultation with attorneys.
Theories and Models of Conflict Resolution
 Dual Concern Model:
 The dual concern model of conflict resolution is a
conceptual perspective that assumes individuals’
preferred method of dealing with conflict is based on
two underlying themes or dimensions: concern for
self (assertiveness) and concern for others (empathy).
 According to the model, group members balance their
concern for satisfying personal needs and interests
with their concern for satisfying the needs and
interests of others in different ways.
Theories and Models of Conflict Resolution
 Dual Concern Model:
 The intersection of these two dimensions
ultimately leads individuals towards exhibiting
different styles of conflict resolution.

 The dual model identifies five conflict resolution

styles/strategies that individuals may use
depending on their dispositions toward pro-self or
pro-social goals
Theories and Models of Conflict Resolution
 Dual Concern Model:
• Avoidance conflict style:
 Characterized by joking, changing or avoiding the topic, or even
denying that a problem exists
 The conflict avoidance style is used when an individual has no
interest in dealing with the other party
 When one is uncomfortable with conflict, or due to cultural contexts.
 During conflict, these avoiders adopt a “wait and see” attitude, often
allowing conflict to phase out on its own without any personal
involvement.
 By neglecting to address high-conflict situations, avoiders risk
allowing problems to fester out of control
Theories and Models of Conflict Resolution
 Dual Concern Model:
• Yielding conflict style:
 Yielding or “accommodating” conflict styles are characterized
by a high level of concern for others and a low level of concern
for oneself.
 This passive pro-social approach emerges when individuals
derive personal satisfaction from meeting the needs of others
and have a general concern for maintaining stable, positive
social relationships.
 When faced with conflict, individuals with a yielding conflict
style tend to give into others’ demands out of respect for the
social relationship
Theories and Models of Conflict Resolution
 Dual Concern Model:
• Competitive conflict style:
 The competitive or “fighting” conflict style maximizes individual
assertiveness (i.e., concern for self) and minimizes empathy
(i.e., concern for others).
 Groups consisting of competitive members generally enjoy
seeking domination over others, and typically see conflict as a
“win or lose” predicament.
 Fighters tend to force others to accept their personal views by
employing competitive power tactics (arguments, insults,
accusations, violence, etc.) that foster feelings of intimidation
(Morrill, 1995)
Theories and Models of Conflict Resolution
 Dual Concern Model:
• Cooperation conflict style:
 Characterized by an active concern for both pro-social and pro-self
behavior, the cooperation conflict style is typically used when an individual
has elevated interests in their own outcomes as well as in the outcomes of
others.
 During conflict, cooperators collaborate with others in an effort to find an
amicable solution that satisfies all parties involved in the conflict.
 Individuals using this type of conflict style tend to be both highly assertive
and highly empathetic.
 By seeing conflict as a creative opportunity, collaborators willingly invest
time and resources into finding a “win-win” solution.
 According to the literature on conflict resolution, a cooperative conflict
resolution style is recommended above all others.
Theories and Models of Conflict Resolution
 Dual Concern Model:
• Conciliation conflict style:
 The conciliation or “compromising” conflict style is typical of
individuals who possess an intermediate level of concern for both
personal and others’ outcomes.
 Compromisers value fairness and, in doing so, anticipate mutual
give-and-take interactions.
 By accepting some demands put forth by others, compromisers
believe this agreeableness will encourage others to meet them
halfway, thus promoting conflict resolution.
 This conflict style can be considered an extension of both
“yielding” and “cooperative” strategies
Theories and Models of Conflict Resolution
 Comprehensive Conflict Coaching Model:
 Client is invited to explore a conflict situation in terms of:
 Identity,
 Emotion
 Power

 This process includes four stages to be facilitated with

client:
 Discover
 Explore
 Craft
 Enact
Theories and Models of Conflict Resolution
 Comprehensive Conflict Coaching Model:
 Discovering the story:
 Client begin to build a coherent narrative to describe their conflict
experience

 Identify the parties involved and refine the story in response to

questions asked

 Make sure they have a complete story that makes sense as an initial
description

 Test the initial story to invite a broader perspective

Theories and Models of Conflict Resolution
 Comprehensive Conflict Coaching Model:
 Exploring Three Perspectives:
 The story is explored from the perspective of identity, power, and
emotion

 Client explore who they are, who they want to be, and what each
party has at stake

 Dynamic of power and influence are described

 Clients identify emotions at play in themselves and others

Theories and Models of Conflict Resolution
 Comprehensive Conflict Coaching Model:
 Crafting the Best Story:
 Clients imagine a preferred future

 They identify the skills they will need to be effective, and the
approach they think will work best

 When a best-case outcome is unlikely, clients describe a

realistic improvement they can accomplish, and also strategies
to reduce tension that will help them cope
Theories and Models of Conflict Resolution
 Comprehensive Conflict Coaching Model:
 Enacting the Best Story:
 Having imagined possible ways to engage and confront, clients
explore these possibilities in details

 This stage concentrates on skill development to prepare clients

to engage effectively and in the way that makes most sense

 New skills are incorporated into day-to-day interactions as

clients learn by doing
Theories and Models of Conflict Resolution
 The REAL Model for Relational Conflict Resolution:
 It is for building relationship and resolving interpersonal
conflict
 It is based on the assumption that people must take action
and learn from behavior-base ‘experiments’ to discover new
ways of being with one another
 A facilitator supports people as they engage productively in
a consistent manner by observing moments of recognition
and empower, reinforcing positive interactions through
feedback and role modeling the skills of constructive
conflict
Theories and Models of Conflict Resolution
 The REAL Model for Relational Conflict Resolution:
 Recognize:
 People want better outcomes but they feel disconnected and in
conflict

 Often one party initiates contact and invites other parties to

engage

 People begin to truly see and hear each other

Theories and Models of Conflict Resolution
 The REAL Model for Relational Conflict Resolution:
 Empower:
 Sense of self in the relationship is diminished and must be
restored

 People doubt resolution is possible or do not know how to

proceed

 People begin to express true feelings and genuine regard

Theories and Models of Conflict Resolution
 The REAL Model for Relational Conflict Resolution:
 Act:
 Someone decides to engage. Either with a party to the conflict
or with someone who can help

 People say what they want and believe is possible

 People agree on plans and ways to implement them

Theories and Models of Conflict Resolution
 The REAL Model for Relational Conflict Resolution:
 Learn:
 As people stay open and avoid judging, communication becomes
possible

 Different perspectives are explored and understood

 New skills are incorporated into day-to-day interactions

Effects of Destructive Conflict Resolution Behaviours
 Avoidance has a negative impact on interpersonal
relationships and resolution of conflict. This negative
impact sometimes even exceeded the negative impact of
open opposition.
 Suppressed conflict compared to active confrontation leads
to escalation of the conflict in the future. By suppressing an
unwanted thought it may lead to increased presence of this
and related thoughts when the suppression is alleviated
 Blaming,
 Invalidating, and
 Eliminating possibilities
Effects of Destructive Conflict Resolution Behaviours

 Therefore, destructive conflict resolution give rise

to more destructive conflict resolution, poor
relationships, depression, poor self-esteem, lack of
positive I conflict resolution skills, and poor ability
to cope.
 There is considerable evidence that corporal
punishment as a conflict resolution behavior used
by some parents is associated with the subsequent
aggression of children
Effects of Destructive Conflict Resolution Behaviours

 A study by Bird, Gryl, and Stith (1991) found that

violent dating relationships relied on the
negotiation styles of negative affect, indirect
appeal, and emotional appeal more frequently than
did partners in nonviolent relationships. They also
relied on confrontation and escape/avoidance as
coping strategies. These negative conflict
resolution behaviors and extremes in coping with
conflict from highly, emotional confrontation to
avoidance appear to be connected with violence.
Ineffective Ways of Dealing with Conflict

 Conquest,
 Avoidance,
 Bargaining,
 Applying a band-aid, and
 Role-playing
Positive Effects of Learning Conflict Resolution Skills
Business:
 Conflict contributes to both attraction to and
understanding of relationships, greater productivity
and creativity and integration of seemingly
opposing interests in schools and in business. They
suggested stimulating conflict while ensuring that
conflicts will be · managed in constructive and
healthy ways. (De Dreu and Van De Vliert , 1997
 In the business environment, teaching the use of
mediation for conflict resolution and prevention
was one means of ameliorating the stress of
increasing diversity in the workforce (Wehrle-
Einhom’s , 1994)
Positive Effects of Learning Conflict Resolution Skills
 Church :
 Use of skills in church setting:
• Development of self-regulation
• Responsibility
• Self-confidence
• Problem solving skills
• Positive attitudes
• Increased pro-social solutions and decreased aggressive solutions
• Peace and tranquility in church
• Church growth and expansion.

 use of skills in non-church settings

• Positive attitudes toward conflict.
• Fewer conflicts.
• Better relationships
• Successful peer resolutions of conflicts.
• Conflict resolution skills being used more often.
Positive Effects of Learning Conflict Resolution Skills

 Couple
• Davidson and Horvath (1997) demonstrated
positive outcome in conflict resolution in a
treatment group using two conflict resolution
skills;
• Reframing
• Restraining
Positive Effects of Learning Conflict Resolution Skills
Family
• Family mediation, most often used in cases of separation and divorce, has
been shown to greatly enhance meeting needs of the relationship
partners.
 It greatly reduced the negative effect on the children of such breakups,
as the orientation is changed from adversarial to seeking win-win
solutions.
 It salvages the relationship with the opening of blocked communication
and the teaching of communication and conflict resolution skills.
 Even if the relationship is not salvaged, as the couple works through
their settlement, they end up doing a great deal of the emotional work
of dissolving the relationship that cannot happen in an adversarial
atmosphere.
 It increases the noncouple's ability to let go and move on with their
lives and be present for their children. The skills learned in mediation
will continue to be used to enhance peaceful conflict resolution for the
non-couple in the future.
 Research findings have indicated that children of divorce are harmed
more by their parents' conflict than by any other single factor
(Benjamin & Irving, 1995; Erickson & Erickson, 1988),