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Book Review: The New Peoplemaking

Brenda Cardozo

University of Monroe, Louisiana

MAFT 6011: Marriage and Family Therapy I

Dr. Samuel Shannon

November 3, 2025
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Virginia Satir is a well-known figure in family therapy, particularly due to her

experiential and humanistic therapeutic approaches. She emphasized the growth potential in

every individual and developed new interventions, such as family sculpting and communication

exercises. Her work laid the groundwork for modern marriage and family therapy, shaping both

systemic theory and clinical practice.

Virginia Satir wrote "The New Peoplemaking" to help individuals and families build

healthier, more functioning connections. She viewed the family as a dynamic system, where each

member's thoughts, emotions, and behaviors all influenced one another. Her work focused on

helping individuals and families enhance their self-esteem and communication skills. Satir

believed that by improving communication, families could express themselves openly, listen

with understanding, and resolve issues more effectively. Her goal was to change patterns of low

self-worth, blame, and criticism into healthy interactions that allowed both children and adults to

grow and thrive in their environment. Satir's work also emphasized that families develop

interaction patterns that are often passed down through generations, shaping how members relate

to one another, express emotions, and handle conflict. She urged families to become

"peoplemakers" by turning negative cycles into helpful, caring, and growth-focused

relationships.

The purpose of The New Peoplemaking is to provide a practical, systemic framework for

understanding and improving family life. She saw families as interconnected systems in which

each person’s behavior, emotions, and communication style affect everyone else. Virginia Satir’s

model focuses on helping families grow and change in positive ways. She works on building

self-esteem, improving communication, and helping people understand their relationships and

emotions better. Satir's approach, rather than relying merely on discussion or insight, promotes
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active participation through exercises and direct experiences, many of which she provides

throughout The New Peoplemaking. These experiential exercises are designed to help individuals

and families recognize patterns, practice new behaviors, and foster personal and relational

growth.

A significant aspect of Satir’s model centers on four common ways people communicate

when they feel stressed or defensive. The placater tries to keep everyone happy and avoid

conflict by always agreeing, even if they do not mean it. The blamer accuses and criticizes others

in order to feel in control or strong. The computer stays calm and logical, avoiding emotions by

focusing only on facts. And the distracter changes the subject or jokes around to avoid dealing

with problems. Satir believed that learning to communicate honestly and openly, instead of using

these defenses, helps families build stronger and healthier relationships. Satir’s goal is to help

individuals achieve congruent communication, which involves aligning their words, feelings, and

actions. Congruence represents healthy communication, so that means expressing thoughts and

emotions authentically without blaming, placating, or distracting. It is intended to create a deeper

connection and understanding in relationships.

As mentioned before, Satir believed self-esteem and personal growth were important. To

support this, she introduces experiential techniques, most notably family sculpting. This is where

family members physically represent relationships and dynamics by arranging themselves to

show emotional distances and roles. This helps families see their dynamics clearly and

communicate more openly and empathetically. Finally, her model addresses coping and

problem-solving strategies, which help families deal with stress and handle conflicts within the

family in a healthy way. She encouraged negotiation, shared responsibility, and emotional
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support. It helped the families deal with the conflicts better, rather than through blame or

avoidance.

Satir’s concepts connect to both older and newer family therapy theories because she

focused on communication, family roles, and emotions. As mentioned earlier, she viewed

families as interconnected systems. This systemic way of thinking influenced Minuchin, who

examined how families are structured, how boundaries work, and the roles of hierarchies and

subsystems. Satir’s focus on self-awareness and understanding emotional patterns correlates with

Bowen’s Family Systems Theory. His theory examines how emotions and relationship dynamics

are passed down through generations. More recent approaches, like Emotionally Focused

Therapy, build on her ideas by focusing on connecting with emotions and being genuine in

relationships. Overall, Satir’s work links older and newer therapy models that all value honesty,

connection, and healthy family change.

Satir’s model is particularly strong in its emphasis on self-esteem and congruent

communication, demonstrating how personal growth directly contributes to healthier family

interactions. Her experiential, systemic, and humanistic approach allows families to recognize

patterns, roles, and relational dynamics through hands-on exercises such as family sculpting. Her

use of practical, easy-to-apply techniques makes her ideas easy to implement, showing why

Satir’s work remains important in family therapy today. Her ideas can also work in online or

video therapy. Techniques like talking exercises, reflection, and exploring family roles can still

be used, even when meeting virtually. Using her people-focused approach with modern

technology helps therapists stay connected with clients and support their growth, making Satir’s

approach both flexible and relevant in today’s world.

Satir emphasized that family patterns and behaviors often pass down across generations.

For example, parents who struggle with communication or emotional expression may

unintentionally pass these habits to their children. Using techniques like family sculpting and

exploring communication stances, therapists can help families recognize these intergenerational

patterns. By doing so, families can break unhealthy cycles, improve relationships, and create a

healthier, more supportive family environment.

Reading about intergenerational patterns reminded me of my own family. Growing up,

my parents rarely showed physical affection, a behavior they had inherited from their own

parents. I began to change that dynamic in middle school by showing affection to them myself.

At first, they were uncomfortable and would sometimes reject it, but over time, it made a

difference. Eventually, my siblings and I received the affection from our mother that we had been

missing. Although we received it from my mother, we still lack it as a whole in my family. For

example, I am not as affectionate with my sisters and father. With my father, it is better than with

my sisters, but not on the same level as my mother. This is something we can work on. Another

example from my mom was that she grew up in a very strict household. Her father never let his

children, particularly the women, leave the house unless it was for school or an essential. He

never let them go hang out with friends, go to the fair, or go shopping for clothes. My mother

always knew she did not want that for her children, so she was more lenient with us. She let us

go where we wanted, as long as we asked for permission, but there were some exceptions. She

never let us sleep over at our friend’s house because, as she always said, one never knows.

However, I grew up hating that. I never got to experience a real sleepover with friends, and I

could only sleep over at my cousin’s house. But now, as I am older, I completely understand

where she was coming from, and I will probably also have that rule with my children. Maybe it
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will change, I am not sure. These experiences reflect Satir’s idea that families can change

long-standing patterns once they become aware of them, creating healthier ways of relating

across generations.

While Satir’s work has many strengths, it also has some limitations. One downside of her

model is that many of the techniques need a trained therapist to work well. Exercises like family

sculpting or role-playing can be emotionally intense, and without proper guidance, families

might not learn much—or could even argue more. Her ideas were primarily developed for

traditional, two-parent families, so they may not always be applicable to single-parent or

nontraditional households. This makes it more challenging for individuals to apply the approach

independently. Another critique is that the book does not discuss cultural or social differences

much. Although Satir’s ideas can be applied to many people, her work was shaped by the time

and culture in which she lived. Modern therapists may need to adapt Satir’s methods to ensure

they are suitable for diverse family backgrounds and respectful of all cultures.

Finally, some of Satir’s concepts—particularly her emphasis on ideal communication,

congruence, and self-esteem—may seem unrealistic or difficult to measure through research. Her

activities help people understand themselves better, but the results are more based on personal

feelings and experiences, not hard data. This makes it difficult for researchers to test and prove

her model compared to other approaches that are more structured and evidence-based.

Although Satir’s work mainly focuses on therapy techniques and improving relationships,

it also has important legal and ethical sides. Therapists using this approach must follow rules

established by COAMFTE and AAMFT, including maintaining professional competence,

obtaining informed consent, and respecting client autonomy. Activities such as family sculpting

or emotional role-plays should always be explained clearly. These techniques can also raise
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confidentiality concerns in family therapy. Sharing personal feelings or family conflicts in front

of others may unintentionally reveal sensitive information about one member to the rest of the

family. Family sculpting and other hands-on exercises can raise ethical concerns in therapy.

When watching a therapy session of Virginia Satir using family sculpting, I began to question

whether that approach would be considered appropriate in today’s society. Satir was physically

moving and positioning her clients, which might raise ethical concerns now. While clients can

give consent, there is always the possibility that they might become uncomfortable during the

process, but choose not to express their discomfort. This is where family sculpting can become

tricky. Therefore, if a therapist chooses to use these techniques today, it is essential that they

continuously check in with the client to ensure they still feel safe and comfortable throughout the

session. In general, therapists need to ensure that Satir’s methods remain effective and

professional by following the modern ethical standards.

While reading The New Peoplemaking, the section about communication habits really

stood out to me—the placater, blamer, distracter, and computer. I started to wonder which one I

was. I concluded that I often fall into the role of a placater. In many situations, I try to avoid

conflict by agreeing or apologizing, even when I do not truly feel that way. Recently, I had an

experience that made that conclusion clear to me. One of my closest friends admitted that he

sometimes manipulates me into doing what he wants. The entire conversation centered on

choosing a place to eat. It was me, him, and our other friend trying to decide on the restaurant.

When my other friend and I disagreed with his choice, he joked that “the manipulation usually

works on me.” That comment hurt me, and I told him I did not like what he said. He brushed it

off, saying that is just how he talks, and that if I took it the wrong way, it was my problem. We

went back and forth, but eventually, as I often do, I let it go to avoid more conflict. I was the
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placater and he was the blamer in that situation. I would like to mention that we discussed it

again, and he sincerely apologized to me. But moving forward in our friendship, I will not allow

myself to be manipulated, as he stated, into doing things only he wants to do.

Satir’s work encouraged my personal growth. Her book includes activities that promote

self-esteem, effective communication, and meaningful connections. I tried some with my family,

which pushed us out of our comfort zone. We rarely show physical or emotional closeness, so

activities involving physical proximity initially felt awkward. Despite discomfort, they helped us

open up and improve our interactions. I appreciate these exercises in her book.

This book showed me the importance of self-esteem for overall well-being and healthy

relationships. I often speak negatively to myself, dwelling on past mistakes and comparisons.

Reading The New Peoplemaking reminded me to build my self-esteem, both for myself and for

future clients. Satir believed that therapists with strong self-worth are better able to support

clients. I will continue working on building my self-esteem, learning to recognize my strengths

and imperfections without judgment.

As previously mentioned, Satir’s concepts—such as family sculpting, communication

stances, and congruent communication—can be applied in therapy to improve family

relationships. These techniques demonstrate the practical application of Satir’s model,

illustrating how Satir’s ideas enable families to express emotions, identify unhelpful

communication patterns, and foster stronger self-esteem and connection. Satir’s human-focused

approach works well with many modern therapy methods. As previously stated, her emphasis on

expressing emotions fits with Emotionally Focused Therapy, which helps create deeper

connections between couples and families. Her views on personal development align with

Solution-Focused Brief Therapy, which focuses on accomplishments rather than problems. Even
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Cognitive-Behavioral Family Therapy can utilize her ideas to help families understand how their

thoughts and communication patterns impact one another. Her human-centered and

compassionate approach, combined with modern methods, makes therapy feel meaningful and

effective.

Satir believed that problems are not just about one person—they often stem from how the

entire family system functions. This is the idea behind systemic thinking: looking at the bigger

picture. Therefore, when a child is acting out or experiencing anxiety, a therapist also looks at the

parents' communication styles, roles, and emotional dynamics within the family. Thinking

systemically helps therapists understand how one person’s behavior affects everyone else,

encouraging both therapists and clients to recognize old patterns and adopt healthier ways of

relating to each other.

Reflecting on Satir’s model has helped me understand my own placater role and the

importance of self-esteem for both myself and my clients. Her humanistic approach has taught

me the value of empathy, openness, and helping clients recognize their strengths. It inspires me

to be a therapist who supports growth, fosters connection, and promotes honest communication

in a safe environment. The New Peoplemaking remains relevant today because its focus on

communication, self-worth, and family connection applies to families of all types. Satir’s ideas

can also be adapted for multicultural, blended, and online settings, keeping her approach

meaningful and effective in today’s diverse world.