Paper 3 (Listening and Integrated Skills)

Part A (compulsory section)

Task 1 (13 marks)

1. terrible // awfiil [65]

2. dog was sick [70]
3. great 〃 wonderfill [89]
4. bought a (new) big TV [25]
5. boring [89]
had to work all weekend [13]
7. playground games // games children play in the playground [69]
8. catch the dragon [67]
9. fingers out [48]
fun to watch [57]
11. computer games fbr animals 〃 computer games animals play [64]
12. crazy cat [79]
13 Dan has done no research // topic has not been researched [16]

Task 2 (13 marks)

14. exit [59]

15. entrance // entry [52]
16. wall(s) (of maze) [61]
17. Dan's first life [55]

£
r
c
B o o M
A o
己…3」4 ,5 6

18. Dan's second life [59]

o
o 0

0 0 o
o
2 6

19. make the game/grid more colourfill [37]

20. (add) more monsters [47]
21. (by) speak(ing) to the (smart)phone [21]
22. (by) touch(ing) the screen [72]
二

1 4
1 3
23. the game sends a document to the player's phone [29]
24. a password appears on the screen [39]
25. the player opens the document with the password [36]
26. the player checks the location of the monsters [25]

Task 3 (13 marks)

27. started completed [40]

28. Pete Pieter [76]
29. [91]
30. riding a horse / horses [47]
31. a pretend wedding // performing a wedding [37]
32. exercise like yoga // yoga (exercise) [53]
33. kicking game [61]
34. eight bit graphics [27]
35. small / little blocks [31]
36. a few colours // a small number of colours [17]
37. complex / complicated images / pictures // a complex / complicated image / picture [30]
38. funny // humorous // like a joke [64]
39. for free // free of charge [44]

Task 4(12 marks)

40. provides (form of) entertainment / pleasure and firn // for entertainment / pleasure and fun [49]
41. has an outcome or goal [23]
42. follows (some set of) rules [59]
43. life is (not) a game // games and life are (not) similar [60]
44. helps them / they learn to fight better in real life [8]
45. play jumping //jump out the water / for fun [57]
46. helps them escape from hunters / predators [19]
47. one rat is (always) stronger / weaker than the other // fighting games occur between stronger and [36]
weaker rats
48. the weaker rat will stop playing if it always loses / keeps losing [27]
49. the stronger rat lets the weaker rat win some of the time so they can keep playing // the stronger m
rat loses deliberately (to the weaker rat) some of the time otherwise it will have no friends to
play with
50. (a kind of) morality // to be moral // morals [33]
51. how to live together peacefully [H]

Note: Figures in square brackets represent the percentage ofcandidates awarded a pointfor the item.
Points within this ( bracket can be in any order.

144

mm
 Part Bl (easier section)

Task 5 (14 marks)

Task Completion = 12 marks

Notemarkers: candidates musl place lhe irrfbrmalion in /he correct seclio) ,0 be awarded a poinL
DF page
reference
5.1 3 7

5.2 4 7

5.3 one (person) vegetarian 8

5.4 (one person needs) wheelchair access 8

5.5 yes 7

5.6 3 // one each day 7

5.7 4 7

5.8a we wanted to make our own board games 3*

5.8b formed two years ago /in 2016 3*

5.8c there are five members in the company 3*

5.9a Death Kick 3*/5

5.9b a Kung Fu / fighting card game 3*

♦ Informationfrom page 3 ofthe Data File isfrom the tapescript

145
Task 5: Language = 2 marks

Marks Accuracy
2 • Simple and more complex phrases are generally accurately constructed.
• Generally understandable though may be some minor errors.
• Most common words are spelt correctly.

• Simple phrases are generally accurate.

• Grammatical errors sometimes affect understanding.
• Spelling of simple words is correct, more complex ones not.

0 • Multiple errors throughout, spelling and/or word usage which make understanding impossible.
OR
• Not enough evidence in candidate's work to be able to award T, possibly due to the candidate
copying everything verbatim from the Data File.

146
 Task 6 (18 marks)

Task Completion = 9 marks

DF page
reference
Appropriate email subject #

6.2 Would you like to do a video review of our game Escape to Hong Kong Island 4

6.3a a zombie game 3*/5

6.3b set in Hong Kong / board is a map of Hong Kong 3*/5

6.3c players start in Kowloon 3*

6.3d players need to work together // it's a team game 3*/5

6.3e two players in each team and two teams 5

6.3f everybody in your team needs to reach Hong Kong Island 3*

6.3g target audience 12 - 15 year olds / young teens 3*/5

♦ Information from page 3 of the Data File is from the tapescript

# The wording of the email subject may vary from candidate to candidate. An appropriate heading should
include:

* video review* 'Griffin Workshop's new game*

or AND or
'invitation to review* * Escape to Hong Kong Island*

147
Task 6: Language 5 marks

Marks Language
5 Data File Manipulation
Generally successful in adapting phrases from the Data File to create grammatically correct
sentences through: word formation changes, tense changes, pronoun changes etc.
Own Language
• A range of accurate sentence structures with a grasp of simple and complex sentences.
• Grammar mainly accurate with occasional common errors that do not affect overall clarity.
• Spelling and punctuation are mostly correct.

4 Data File Manipulation

Sometimes successful in adapting phrases from the Data File to create grammatically correct
sentences. This is done through some of: word formation changes, tense changes, pronoun changes
etc.
Own Language
• A range of accurate sentence structures with some attempts to use more complex sentences.
• Grammatical errors occur in more complex structures but overall clarity not affected.
• Spelling and punctuation are sufficiently accurate to convey meaning.

3 Data File Manipulation

Occasionally successful in adapting phrases from the Data File to create grammatically conect
sentences though more often errors occur due to failing to change the original texts to the
requirements of his/her own text.
Own Language
• Simple sentences are generally accurately constructed. Occasional attempts are made to use
more complex sentences. Structures used tend to be repetitive in nature.
• Grammatical errors sometimes affect meaning.
• Most common words are spelt correctly, with basic punctuation being accurate.

2 Data File Manipulation

Writing characterised by occasional attempts to adapt language from Data File or by chunks taken
verbatim from the Data File.
Own Language
• Short simple sentences are generally accurate. Only scattered attempts at longer, more complex
sentences.
• Grammatical errors often affect meaning.
• Spelling of simple words is correct, more complex ones not, with basic punctuation mostly
accurate.

Data File Manipulation

Writing characterised by being mostly a series of chunks taken verbatim from the Data File.
Own Language
• Short simple sentences may be accurate.
• Grammatical errors often affect meaning.
• Spelling of simple words is correct, more complex ones not, with basic punctuation often faulty.

0 • Writing characterised by being a series of chunks taken verbatim from the Data File.
• Multiple errors in sentence structures, spelling and/or word usage which make understanding
impossible.
OR
• Not enough evidence in candidate's work to be able to award * 1 '•

148
 Task 6: Coherence and Organisation = 2 marks

Marks Coherence and Organisation

• Overall coherence of text very good with a clear focus on task throughout.
• Relations between main points and supporting points always clear.
• Strong cohesive ties used to enhance coherence when necessary.

• Overall coherence of text is reasonable with a reasonably clear focus on task throughout.
• The relations between main points and supporting points generally clear.
• Cohesive ties used generally enhance coherence although these may occasionally be fuzzy.

0 • Overall coherence of description is weak.

• Supporting details generally not clearly related to main points.
• Cohesive ties used contribute little to the coherence of the text.
OR
• Not enough evidence in candidate's work to be able to award T.

Task 6: Appropriacy = 2 marks

Marks Appropriacy
• Register, tone and style generally appropriate through manipulation of parts of Data File and own
language.
• The candidate has produced a text appropriate for task.

• Register, tone and style reasonably appropriate to the text through some manipulation of parts of
Data File and through own language.
• Tone may be inconsistent due to parts being copied verbatim from the Data File.

0 • Little or no evidence of an ability to manipulate register, tone or style in order to produce an

appropriate text.
• The candidate has written a text which is characterised by having copied chunks of the Data File
indiscriminately. Does not give the impression of the writer's own text written to fulfil the task.

Key Appropriacy areas include (but are not limited to):

• It is an external email inviting a reviewer from outside the company to do a review.

• The writer is writing on behalf of Griffin Workshop.
• The tone should be polite as s/he is making a request and also informative in providing the details about the
game.
. The reviewer did a review for a Griffin Workshop product previously. Game reviewers on YouTube are
usually young and/or game fans. The candidate may choose to be reasonably informal in his/her approach,
e.g. 'Dear Paul', 'How are things with you?* etc.

149
Task 7 (20 marks)

Task Completion = 11 marks

DF page
reference
7.1a overall people like the game 6

7.2a game is not easy to learn 6

7.2b need more examples in rulebook / rules 6

7.3a people don't like the artwork 6

7.3b too childish / game for teenagers not primary kids 5/6

7.4a people don't think the map is clear 6

7.4b font size too small 6

7.4c can't see red text 6

7.5a extra examples haven't been added to rulebook yet 9

7.5b artist hasn't given new artwork // will send new artwork next Wednesday /18 April 9

7.5c text on the map is now black and bigger font 9

150
Task 7: Language = 5 marks

Marks Language
5 Data File Manipulation
Generally successfill in ad叩ting phrases from the Data File to create grammatically correct
sentences through: word formation changes, tense changes, pronoun changes etc.
Own Language
• A range of accurate sentence structures with a grasp of simple and complex sentences.
• Grammar mainly accurate with occasional common errors that do not affect overall clarity.
• Spelling and punctuation are mostly correct

4 Data File Manipulation

Sometimes successful in adapting phrases from the Data File to create grammatically correct
sentences. This is done through some of: word formation changes, tense changes, pronoun changes
etc.
Own Language
• A range of accurate sentence structures with some attempts to use more complex sentences.
• Grammatical errors occur in more complex structures but overall clarity not affected.
• Spelling and punctuation are sufficiently accurate to convey meaning.

3 Data File Manipulation

Occasionally successful in adapting phrases from the Data File to create grammatically correct
sentences though more often errors occur due to failing to change the original texts to the
requirements of his/her own text.
Own Language
• Simple sentences are generally accurately constructed. Occasional attempts are made to use
more complex sentences. Structures used tend to be repetitive in nature.
• Grammatical errors sometimes affect meaning.
• Most common words are spelt correctly, with basic punctuation being accurate.

2 Data File Manipulation

Writing characterised by occasional attempts to adapt language from Data File or by chunks taken
verbatim from the Data File.
Own Language
• Short simple sentences are generally accurate. Only scattered attempts at longer, more complex
sentences.
• Grammatical errors often a fleet meaning.
• Spelling of simple words is correct, more complex ones not, with basic punctuation mostly
accurate.

1 Data File Manipulation

Writing characterised by being mostly a series of chunks taken verbatim from the Data File.
Own Language
• Short simple sentences may be accurate.
• Grammatical errors often affect meaning.
• Spelling of simple words is correct, more complex ones not, with basic punctuation often faulty.

• Writing characterised by being a series of chunks taken verbatim from the Data Fil已
• Multiple errors in sentence structures, spelling and/or word usage which make understanding
impossible.
OR
• Not enough evidence in candidate's work to be able to award * 1

151
 Task 7: Coherence and Organisation = 2 marks

Marks Coherence and Organisation

• Overall coherence of text very good with a clear focus on task throughout.
• Relations between main points and supporting points always clear.
• Strong cohesive ties used to enhance coherence when necessary.

• Overall coherence of text is reasonable with a reasonably clear focus on task throughout.
• The relations between main points and supporting points generally clear.
• Cohesive ties used generally enhance coherence although these may occasionally be fuzzy.

0 • Overall coherence of description is weak.

• Supporting details generally not clearly related to main points.
• Cohesive ties used contribute little to the coherence of the text.
OR
• Not enough evidence in candidate's work to be able to award T.

Task 7: Appropriacy = 2 marks

Marks Appropriacy
2 • Register, tone and style generally appropriate through manipulation of parts of Data File and own
language.
• The candidate has produced a text appropriate for task.

• Register, tone and style reasonably appropriate to the text through some manipulation of parts of
Data File and through own language.
• Tone may be inconsistent due to parts being copied verbatim from the Data File.

0 • Little or no evidence of an ability to manipulate register, tone or style in order to produce an

appropriate text.
• The candidate has written a text which is characterised by having copied chunks of the Data File
indiscriminately. Does not give the impression of the writer*s own text written to fulfil the task.

Key Appropriacy areas include (but are not limited to):

• It is an internal report for a very small company with four other staff members who are all friends.
• The candidate may choose to make the report quite formal but equally a less formal approach (using first
names etc.) is also appropriate.
• A title specific enough to explain the purpose of the report is 叩propriate.
• An introduction referring to the report and its purpose/background is appropriate.
• The results from the questionnaire should be summarised or at least presented in an accessible and succinct
manner and/or their relevance stated.
• The use of sections, headings and bullet points is appropriate.
• The report should end with a statement of the work still to be done or future action. J

152
 Part B2 (more difficult section)

Task 8 (22 marks)

Task Completion = 13 marks

Gamezstart:
DF page
reference
Advantage', (most) well-known funding website for board games / board game 3*
8.1a
companies
8.1b you get to advertise your game and this attracts investors 5
Advantage. Flexible 一 you set the target needed to produce / to be able to continue
8.1c 5
developing the game
8.1d Advantage', is global / online so can raise money from anywhere in the world 3*

8.2a Disadvantage: Game will be ignored if at same time as big company's project 5
Disadvantage. May not reach target and would have to abandon project (and waste
8.2b 5
time and effort)
8.2c Disadvantage'. International shipping expensive (especially for board games) 5
* Information from page 3 ofthe Data File isfrom the tapescript

Acorn Grant:
DF page
reference
8.3a Acorn Grant is sponsored by MelakaBank 6

8.3b HK$250,000 of money (as one-time award) 6

8.3c Advantage', will provide financial and advertising advice for a year 6/7
Disadvantage: Competition is fierce // it is difficult to win (last year 287 companies
8.4a 6
applied and only one winner)

8.4b Disadvantage: just wants to control 3*

we / Griffin Workshop would lose our independence // we don't want others to control
8.4c 3*
us / value our independence
♦ Information from page 3 ofthe Data File isfrom the tapescript

153
Task 8: Language = 5 marks

Marks Language

5 Data File Manipulation

Successful manipulation of phrases from the Data File to create grammatically correct sentences.
Achieved through a wide variety of changes made to the original texts.
Own Language
• A wide range of accurate sentence structures using own language, with an excellent grasp of
more complex structures.
• Grammar extremely accurate with very occasional slips.
• Spelling and punctuation are mostly correct.

4 Data File Manipulation

Generally successful in adapting phrases from the Data File to create grammatically correct
sentences through some of: word formation changes, tense changes, pronoun changes etc.
Own Language
• A range of accurate sentence structures with a grasp of simple and complex sentences.
• Grammar mainly accurate with occasional common errors that do not affect overall clarity.
• Spelling and punctuation are mostly correct.

3 Data File Manipulation

Sometimes successful in adapting phrases from the Data File to create grammatically correct
sentences. This is done through some of: word formation changes, tense changes, pronoun changes
etc.
Own Language
• A range of accurate sentence structures with some attempts to use more complex sentences.
• Grammatical errors occur in more complex structures but overall clarity not affected.
• Spelling and punctuation are sufficiently accurate to convey meaning.

2 Data File Manipulation

Occasionally successful in adapting phrases from the Data File to create grammatically correct
sentences though more often errors occur due to failing to change the original texts to the
requirements of his/her own text.
Own Language
• Simple sentences are generally accurately constructed. Occasional attempts are made to use
more complex sentences. Structures used tend to be repetitive in nature.
• Grammatical errors sometimes affect meaning.
• Most common words are spelt correctly, with basic punctuation being accurate.
I
Data File Manipulation
Writing characterised by occasional attempts to adapt language from Data File or by chunks taken
verbatim from the Data File.
Own Language
• Short simple sentences are generally accurate. Only scattered attempts at longer, more complex
sentences.
• Grammatical errors often affect meaning.
• Spelling of simple words is correct, more complex ones not, with basic punctuation mostly
accurate.

0 Data File Manipulation

Writing characterised by being mostly a series of chunks taken verbatim from the Data File.
Own Language
• Short simple sentences may be accurate.
• Grammatical errors often affect meaning.
• Spelling of simple words is correct, more complex ones not, with basic punctuation often faulty.
OR
• Not enough evidence in candidate's work to be able to award ' 1

154
 Task 8: Coherence and Organisation = 2 marks

Marks Coherence and Organisation

2 • Overall coherence of text is very good.
• It is clearly on topic and congruent with the subject.
• Relations between main points and supporting points always clear.
• Strong cohesive ties used to enhance coherence when necessary.

1 • Overall coherence of text is reasonable.

• It is generally on topic and congruent with the subject.
• Relations between main points and supporting points generally clear.
• Cohesive ties used generally enhance coherence although these may occasionally be fuzzy.

0 • Overall coherence of text is weak.

• It is mostly ofFtopic and not clearly congruent with the subject.
• Supporting details generally not clearly related to main points.
• Cohesive ties used contribute little to the coherence of the text.
OR
• Not enough evidence in candidate's work to be able to award ' 1

Task 8: Appropriacy = 2 marks

Marks Appropriacy
• Register, tone and style generally appropriate to text through manipulation of parts of Data File
and own language.
• Consistently demonstrates audience awareness.

1 • Register, tone and style reasonably appropriate to text through some manipulation of parts of
Data File and through own language.
• The tone may be inconsistent.

0 Little or no evidence of an ability to manipulate register, tone or style in order to produce an

appropriate text.

Key appropriacy areas include (but are not limited to):

• It is an internal workplace report for a small company.

• The intended audience is the other four people in the company. The use of 'we' is a possible approach.
• A relevant title, headings and numbered paragraphs are al) appropriate.
• No conclusion or recommendation is required though a brief concluding statement is appropriate, e.g.
indicating next stage of process.
• It should not read like an essay.
• Should be reasonably formal and measured (i.e. avoid simply repeating other people's hyperbole).
Inappropriate words and phrases from the Data File include:
advertising wizardry; big shark; the clever part is; Gamezstart stinks; gonna be; huge drawbacks; a load of
money; no ifs no buts; problem solved!; no strings attached; one huge plus; ultimate flexibility; want to
control everything; What's so good about?; a win-win situation.

155
Task 9 (13 marks)
Task Completion = 7 marks

DF page
reference
9.1 book eight tables / all tables / whole cafiS // 32 people coming

9.2 from 6pm - 9pm 9

9.3 (Wednesday) 2 May 9

9.4 Griffin Workshop / our company / we will pay the fee / for customers 9

9.5 we want a discount of 50% 9&10

9.6 Crossroads Game Ca任 should contact (regular) customers about the competition 9&10

9.7 Eric Park has been confirmed / has been invited / will come as a (special) guest 10

Task 9: Language 3 marks

Marks Language
3 Data File Manipulation
Generally successful in adapting phrases from the Data File to create grammatically correct
sentences through some of: word formation changes, tense changes, pronoun changes etc.
Own Language
• A range of accurate sentence structures with a grasp of simple and complex sentences.
• Grammar mainly accurate with occasional common errors that do not affect overall clarity.
• Spelling and punctuation are mostly correct.
2 Data File Manipulation
Sometimes successful in adapting phrases from the Data File to create grammatically correct
sentences. This is done through some of: word formation changes, tense changes, pronoun changes
etc.
Own Language
• A range of accurate sentence structures with some attempts to use more complex sentences.
• Grammatical errors occur in more complex structures but overall clarity not affected.
• Spelling and punctuation are sufficiently accurate to convey meaning.
Data File Manipulation
Writing characterised by occasional attempts to adapt language from Data File or by chunks taken
verbatim from the Data File.
Own Language
• Short simple sentences are generally accurate. Only scattered attempts at longer, more complex
sentences.
• Grammatical errors often affect meaning.
• Spelling of simple words is correct, more complex ones not, with basic punctuation mostly
accurate. __
0 Data File Manipulation
Writing characterised by being mostly a series of chunks taken verbatim from the Data File.
Own Language
• Short simple sentences may be accurate.
• Grammatical errors often affect meaning.
• Spelling of simple words is correct, more complex ones not, with basic punctuation often faulty.
OR
• Not enough evidence in candidate's work to be able to award ' 1____________________

156
 Task 9: Coherence and Organisation = 1 mark

Marks Coherence and Organization

• Overall coherence of text is very good.
• Relations between main points and supporting points always clear.
• Strong cohesive ties used to enhance coherence when necessary.

0 • Overall coherence of text is weak.

• Supporting details generally not clearly related to main points.
• Cohesive ties used contribute little to the coherence of the text.
OR
• Not enough evidence in candidate's work to be able to award ' 1

Task 9: Appropriacy = 2 marks

Marks Appropriacy
2 • Register, tone and style generally appropriate to text through manipulation of parts of Data File
and own language.
• Consistently demonstrates audience awareness.

1 • Register, tone and style reasonably appropriate to text through some manipulation of parts of
Data File and through own language.
• The tone may be inconsistent.

0 Little or no evidence of an ability to manipulate register, tone or style in order to produce an

appropriate text.

Key appropriacy areas include (but are not limited to):

• It is an external email to the owner of a games ca侥 written on behalf of Griffin Workshop.
• It is a response to the owner's own reply to a Griffin Workshop staff member's initial enquiry.
• The tone should be businesslike and polite and should show some tact in negotiating the cost.
• It need not be too formal as it is to the owner of a small ca伝.

157
Task 10 {17 marks)

Task Completion = 8 marks

DF page
referenc

Art on map

10.1 majority of teenagers and parents were positive (loved it or said was OK) 8

Art on cards

10.2a majority of teenagers loved it, majority of parents hated it 8

10.2b too much blood 11

usually it's parents who have final say in whether game gets bought / who buy it
10.2c 3*
themselves or will demand to see what their child has bought
parents will not approve of the artwork / buying the game if too graphic / violent (even
10.2d 3*
if appeals to teenagers)

Text on map

10.3a majority of both parents and teenagers said it wasn't really easy to read 8

10.3b colour of text (is red and) needs to be darker 10

10.4 Reminder: Must be completed by 27th of this month / April 10

158
Task 10: Language = 5 marks

Marks Language
-5~ Data File Manipulation
Successful manipulation of phrases from the Data File to create grammatically correct sentences.
Achieved through a wide variety of changes made to the original texts.
Own Language
• A wide range of accurate sentence structures using own language, with an excellent grasp of
more complex structures.
• Grammar extremely accurate with very occasional slips.
• Spelling and punctuation are mostly correct.

Data File Manipulation

Generally successful in adapting phrases from the Data File to create grammatically correct
sentences through some of: word formation changes, tense changes, pronoun changes etc.
Own Language
• A range of accurate sentence structures with a grasp of simple and complex sentences.
• Grammar mainly accurate with occasional common errors that do not affect overall clarity.
• Spelling and punctuation are mostly correct.

3 Data File Manipulation

Sometimes successful in adapting phrases from the Data File to create grammatically correct
sentences. This is done through some of: word formation changes, tense changes, pronoun changes
etc.
Own Language
• A range of accurate sentence structures with some attempts to use more complex sentences.
• Grammatical errors occur in more complex structures but overall clarity not affected.
• Spelling and punctuation are sufficiently accurate to convey meaning.

Data File Manipulation

Occasionally successful in adapting phrases from the Data File to create grammatically correct
sentences though more often errors occur due to failing to change the original texts to the
requirements of his/her own text.
Own Language
• Simple sentences are generally accurately constructed. Occasional attempts are made to use
more complex sentences. Structures used tend to be repetitive in nature.
• Grammatical errors sometimes affect meaning.
• Most common words are spelt correctly, with basic punctuation being accurate.

Data File Manipulation

Writing characterised by occasional attempts to ad叩t language from Data File or by chunks taken
verbatim from the Data File.
Own Language
• Short simple sentences are generally accurate. Only scattered attempts at longer, more complex
sentences.
• Grammatical errors often affect meaning.
• Spelling of simple words is correct, more complex ones not, with basic punctuation mostly
accurate.

Data File Manipulation

Writing characterised by being mostly a series of chunks taken verbatim from the Data File.
Own Language
• Short simple sentences may be accurate.
• Grammatical errors often affect meaning.
• Spelling of simple words is correct, more complex ones not, with basic punctuation often faulty.
OR
• Not enough evidence in candidate's work to be able to award ' 1

159
Task 10: Coherence and Organisation = 2 marks

Marks Coherence and Organisation

2 • Overall coherence of text is very good.
• It is clearly on topic and congruent with subject.
• Relations between main points and supporting points always clear.
• Strong cohesive ties used to enhance coherence when necessary.

• Overall coherence of text is reasonable.

• It is generally on topic and congruent with the subject.
• Relations between main points and supporting points generally clear.
• Cohesive ties used generally enhance coherence although these may occasionally be fuzzy.

0 • Overall coherence of text is weak.

• It is mostly off topic and not clearly congruent with the subject.
• Supporting details generally not clearly related to main points.
• Cohesive ties used contribute little to the coherence of the text.
OR
• Not enough evidence in candidate's work to be able to award ' 1*.

• The Subject Line should:

o cohere with the upcoming text and;
o be distinct enough to be functional in the recipienfs inbox;
o refer to something like 4feedback on artwork samples* and be specific enough to distinguish it from the
other work the artist will inevitably be doing fbr other companies. A reference to * Escape to Hong
Kong Island' or 'Griffin Workshop* would therefore be beneficial.

Task 10: Appropriacy (A) = 2 marks

Marks Appropriacy

• Register, tone and style generally appropriate to text through manipulation of parts of Data File
and own language.
• Consistently demonstrates audience awareness.

• Register, tone and style reasonably appropriate to text through some manipulation of parts of
Data File and through own language.
• The tone may be inconsistent.

0 Little or no evidence of an ability to manipulate register, tone or style in order to produce an

appropriate text.

Key Appropriacy areas include (but are not limited to):

• It is an external email written to an artist who has been hired to do the artwork.
• The tone should be businesslike, encouraging regarding the positive aspects and tactful when broaching the
subject of the parts to be amended.
• It should include a subject line.
• It should not be too formal as it is to an artist who has a working relationship with the company.
• Above all, as Angel explicitly states, the email should not upset the artist. Phrases likely to upset the artist
from the Data File include: hate it; pretty mixed; why choose red?; worry about you getting it done; was
late 2 weeks last time; get it done by the 27th; awful.

160