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HYPNOTIC INFLUENCE
Transcript – Module 1

Igor Ledochowski
 Hypnotic Influence – Transcript Module 1

Table of Contents
Hypnotic Influence – Transcript Module 1 .................................................................... 2
Module 1 – The 3 Part Model Of Influence, Connecting With Trust & Demo (1) “Enhancing
Social Support Signals” ...................................................................................................... 2
Role Models Of Influence........................................................................................................ 2
A Simple 3 Part Model Of Influence........................................................................................ 7
Making Trustworthy Connections......................................................................................... 11
Demo: Enhancing Social Support Signals .............................................................................. 19

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 Hypnotic Influence – Transcript Module 1

Hypnotic Influence – Transcript Module 1

Module 1 – The 3 Part Model Of Influence, Connecting

With Trust & Demo (1) “Enhancing Social Support
Signals”

Role Models Of Influence

Igor: Welcome, guys. Great to see so many people here. A lot of faces I'm looking
at right now, some familiar, some less so. But this is a huge group, I'm really
excited to see you guys here today, and again, thanks for joining us. Thanks
for being part of this.

What are we here to do? We're to explore the principles of influence,

especially as hypnotists. in other words, we're interested in influencing both
the conscious and more importantly, the unconscious mind as part of what
we do. Now, we're going to have a system for both styles of influence because
together is where they are the strongest, right?

Now, there's many different influence models out there, guys. There's the
Power Model, and likely the two key distinguishing models for influence are
power and collaboration, right? Power is how can I get you do something?
That's the Authority Model, the yell and shout, I'll use my status, my position,
my resources, and because you want access to them somehow you have to
do something for me.

That's an okay form of influence, but I much prefer the Collaboration Model,
especially for the long-term view, right? Because the collaboration looks at
the win-win idea. and if you are winning, well then want to keep on winning,
right? I can't remember who it was that said, I think it was Zig Ziegler or Del
Carnegie, or someone in that vein said something along the lines of, I think
this is a very insightful quote on influence which is, "You can get anything you
want out of life, as long as you help people get what they want." So if you
help people get what they want, they'll help you get what you want. That is

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the essence of the Collaboration Model in action and that's really what we
want to be exploring here in the next three days.

Does it matter that I'm a complete novice? No, Leah, welcome, we're going
to be starting from scratch, right? You're in the same place as pretty much
everyone else is here. This is going to be, look, I'm going to call this brand new
content, but it's not entirely brand new. I'm pulling together the core themes
from a number of different courses to give you, over the next three days, a
really clear, simple, a practical and hugely robust method of influence,
something that you can turn on and use on a daily basis.

So, let's talk a little bit about the influences for this program just so you have
an idea of where you can go to deepen any learnings if you are particularly
interested in a particular aspect of what we're going to be doing over the next
three days, right? So, in terms of my work, this course is going to be drawing
from Applied Conversational Hypnosis, then from Conversational Hypnosis
the regular version, in particular frame control around that. Number three,
we're going to be looking at hypnotic rapport and how to build that, and of
course, we've got a couple of courses on that. And number four, the language
we'll be using and some of the tactics we'll be using come straight from the
hypnotic negotiation stack. So those four courses are going to be at the heart
of what we're doing here, and we're going to be pulling basically the essence
of each of those four courses out and put them together here for you into an
influenced formula.

Other sources. When I've been developing this, as you know, I've been
spending the last 20-plus years trying to develop and polish Conversational
Hypnosis, that's the things I've been most interested in, and that means both
on the therapeutic side and on the influence side. So for the therapeutic side,
as you will probably know, I have a huge role model in Milton Erickson, and I
have sub-role models underneath that from the Ericksonian camps that help
me develop different aspects of Conversational Hypnosis and we've got John
Overdurf from the one side, David Grove, a phenomenal guy, another
hypnotist in the same sort of vein. But when it comes to influence, I need to
look at a different category, or class of overall models. Why? Because this is
influence outside of the therapeutic context. That's really what we're here to
discover.

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The things you will learn here will absolutely make you a better
hypnotherapist if that's what you are, or better coach if that's what you are.
But more importantly, it's going to go beyond that. It allows you to move your
influence into work with your family, into teaching, into business, being a
good parent, sales, therapy, basically any place where you need someone else
to do something or be something is where we'll be able to go with the tools
I'm creating for you.

You know my lineage when it comes to hypnotherapy and I'm very strong in
the Ericksonian camp, I'm using that as my baseline to create more of the
Conversational Hypnosis approach. But let's look at the influence side. Who
are the role models there? Who can you look at if you're more interested in
following-up on those sides of things? So the four individuals that I have
chosen as role models for the influencing process, are number one, Socrates.
Socrates was an amazing influencer, and let's face it, his influence has echoed
down 3000 years almost, or maybe two and a half thousand years of history
and he's still influential today. The way that he influenced people back then
is still being used today, it's called the dialectic method or Socratic method
and it is an incredibly helpful way of influencing others for the good, right?

Number two, of course, Erickson's going to make that list. The thing with
Erickson though is because he was so focused on the therapy, we have to read
between the lines to see what he was doing that was not directly therapeutic,
but to build up the therapeutic process. and in particular, I'm most interested
in my, you've got to read it between the lines because he doesn't give you an
outline for this, but the way that I think that Erickson interviewed his clients
in order to then construct the therapies and the trances afterwards, that I
think is a hugely missed point of influence and there's hints in his books and
writings et cetera and what he does there, and I've tried to draw those hints
together in to a practical method or system.

Number three is a man called Jordan Belfort. You probably know him better
as the Wolf of Wall Street. There was a movie made about him some years
ago. Very interesting character, hugely influential, probably one of the best
salesmen in history. And again, if you start looking at this approach, there is
a lot of parallels with Conversational Hypnosis both the applied passive kind
and the active more power of Conversational Hypnosis kind as well, right?

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Number four is an FBI negotiator called Chris Voss. The reason I use him is
because again, when you look at his approach it goes hand in glove with
Conversational Hypnosis. He is independently, through the FBI and so on,
developed a method that looks really similar to the way we use
Conversational Hypnosis, and the reason I really like him in particular is
because look, he had to influence in one of the most difficult conditions
possible, hostage negotiations, right? That is basically as confrontational as
you can get and still get an outcome.

William, Jordan Belfort is his name, the Wolf of Wall Street, his surname is
Belfort, B-E-L-F-O-R-T.

Okay, so yes, exactly Chris Voss talks about warping people's realities,
because he's creating mind bending moments and so on. So those are the
four models that I have used in order to develop my own style of influencing
Conversational Hypnosis. If you're interested in their backgrounds, I strongly
recommend them all. Just remember, they're all human beings, we're all
flawed, so there'll be some good and some bad in the mix. They were the
foundations although, which allowed us to simulate the things that we'll be
learning here, right?

Just as an aside if you guys are interested, let going to give you some book
recommendations straight upfront. I know you guys will ask, so I might as well
give them to you straight away. For Socrates, I recommend a book called The
Gorgias, Patrick, or Oresztesz, or Kyle, might want to type that in for
everyone, The Gorgias, is the go-to. That's the one where he uses his Socratic
style in the most directly influential way. He's basically using rhetoric
principles in order to show an orator that he's evil and he doesn't get
anywhere near truth. So that's kind of a fun little side line there.

For Jordan Belfort, it's real simple, it's called the Way of The Wolf, is the book.
The Wolf of Wall Street is another book, that's his story. It's interesting, it's
basically the story that was made into a movie. But the place where you'll see
his influence method is called the Way of The Wolf, and that's an excellent
book. For Chris Voss, I would recommend Never Split The Difference, that's
his go to, seminal book. Genius, beautiful elements in that, and you will see a
lot of Applied Conversational Hypnosis principles throughout that book. And

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finally although this is not an influence model per se, it is absolutely worth
your while reading Robert Cialdini, his book is called Influence, says it all,
right? And he is the seminal researcher, academic, who has looked at the six
core principles in the influencers talk. And again, we'll be introducing you to
some of his work as we go through the next few days, okay?

So why am I mentioned the influencer models? First of all you need to know
my pedigree to get a sense of where I'm coming from. Secondly, because we
only have three days together, I want you to have places you can go to deepen
your knowledge if you want to do that. You can deepen it with us directly
through some of the other courses that look at aspects of what you'll be
learning here in more details, and you can go indirectly by looking at the four
role models that I've just described out for you guys, right? Okay yes, and I
think Elizabeth has just gave you guys a link for a free copy of The Gorgias,
there's no copyright on it because he's been dead two and a half thousand
years, so it's a free book. The others you will probably have to pay for because
they're actually living authors, so they get paid for that.

Okay so we have established that we want to have a collaborative model.

We've established that this is outside of the formal hypnotic context,
although you can use the exact same principal inside of a formal hypnotic
context and it will enhance the power of your suggestions, shall we say, right?
Russell is asking for any Ericksonian books, the problem I have on this one,
recommending an Erickson book for influence is he never really spoke about
influence. I can recommend many Erickson books, but he didn't directly
address the idea of how to create influence for someone else, hence I don't
have an Erickson book on influence, that's why I replaced Cialdini with
Erickson for reading further into influence principles. Basically anything with
Erickson's name as a co author is worth reading, in my opinion.

If you want a good starting point then I'd go with the three books that Rossi
wrote with him, what are they called again? Hypnotic Realities, I believe is the
first one, and after that I have to look it up, it's been a while since I have
looked at them, some years now. But Hypnotic Realities is the go to on that
one, it's a beautiful book, it goes into the foundations of Erickson hypnosis,
the language patterns and influence and so on, that's your closest bet to a
book on influence, hypnotically speaking. But it's not something that you can

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use in everyday life, because he talks about doing very over trances, and he
demonstrates over trances. Hence we want other role models on how to
apply this in everyday situations, right?

A Simple 3 Part Model Of Influence

Igor: Okay, so we've got our role models, now what we need to do is we need to
look at a simple model, how do we take all these ideas and combine them?
What I want to do now is give you a really simple three pronged model that
we're going to be using for the next three days to hang all of the information
around so that you have a simple, easy strategy inside your mind, so you
always know what it is you're doing and where you are in the influence
process, is that okay with you guys? Okay, so here are the three core things
we're going to be seeking to do over the next three days, number one, we've
got to build trust. If collaboration is our main model, then trust is the lifeblood
of collaboration, right? So we've got to build that trust so that we can get
someone in the collaborative mood.

If you're using a different model of influence, for example, a Power Model,

then you might want to go with something like fear. But the problem with
that is it hasn't got a really good long term perspective, fear tends to create
irrationality and erratic behaviors and ultimately anyone who has used fear
long term has it blow up in their faces eventually, because it gets harder and
harder to predict people's behaviors when fear is part of that mix, right? So
we need to build trust, number one. Number two, we need to gather
information, right? We need to gather enough information that we can
recreate the clients' mind, we're going to create a simulation of a clients' mind
when it comes to whatever behavior or state of being or release you want
them to have so that you can then use the clients' existing reality as a way of
shaping the new reality you want for them. Do that make sense guys?

So the first step to that is, you have got to gather information, you have got
to know what's going on inside their mind so you know what the obstacles
are and what their resources are. When you know the obstacles and
resources, you can use their resources to diminish their obstacles and then
use those resources to build the new reality that you need them to have

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inside, or that they want to get to. And finally step three is you've got to make
some kind of an offer. You will know exactly what offer to make once you've
gather enough information. If you know everything about a person, what
motivates them, what moves them, what excites them, what they want and
what they don't want, then it's actually a really straightforward process of
influence because you say okay, link what they're looking for with what
you've got. As soon as those things are linked truthfully, that's the key
element of course, influence is automatic.

Because this is the idea of enlightened self interest, people work in their self
interest as long as they can see that they're working in their self interest. So
as soon as you can link whatever influence piece you're trying to do to their
self interest, well influence will naturally follow, right? Okay, so the three
points of the model, number one, trust. Number two, information, gather
information. Number three, present an offer, right? Okay so do you
understand the basic model guys? Just throw me a Y in to the chat box if
you're on board or give me some thumbs up as we're going along. Excellent,
very good, excellent. All right so trust, gather information and make an offer
that they can't refuse. They can't refuse it if you have the right information
because you've linked it together, all right?

Okay, so what I'm going to be focusing on today, today I'm going to be

focusing on opening the lines of communication and then keeping them open.
We need to be able to have communication if we're going to have
collaboration, and if collaboration is going to be our main strategy for
influencing then we're going to need those open lines of communication,
otherwise there's no influence to be had here, right? So we're going to be
focused on keeping those lines open, then we'll start looking at what we do
with the information that we've gathered and finally, not today of course as
the day just progressed, we'll look at some troubleshooting elements on what
can specifically go wrong during the influencing process and how do we fix
those things, all right?

Anything else we had here? Yes, now because we're in a Collaboration Model,
we're always looking for a win-win, right? Now win-win is interesting, why?
Because win-win has to be perceived to be a win. Let me repeat that, this is
really important, a win is only a win if they perceive it as a win, right? So what

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do I mean by that? Anyone here like, I don't know, sugar? Sweet things?
Anyone here have some pleasant things that they enjoy, candy chocolate, hot
chocolate, sugar in their coffee, their tea? Cake? Basically, we have an insane
amount of food groups that include sugar. So what if I removed all sugar from
your life, you had zero access to sugar anymore, right? Is that a win or is that
a loss for you? Go ahead and type it in, win or loss? Win in terms of, there you
go, Pierre’s got it as both, right? And it depends, 100%.

So it can be a win and it can be a loss. It's a loss because you're losing
something that gives you pleasure, something you find pleasant, maybe even
a coping mechanism. When you have a hard day you might have a chocolate
bar as a way of easing yourself off, and again as Gary points out if you're
diabetic it's a huge win because you're no longer exacerbating your condition,
right? So whether removing your sugar is a win or a loss, purely looked at
from a health perspective, it's a win. Doctors would call it a huge win because
sugar is basically the number one poison we all take, if you removed sugar
from your life entirely your health would soar dramatically. Your energy levels
would soar, your mental clarity would soar and all kinds of other stuff, right?

So what's the point here? By offering to remove sugar from your life I'm not
necessarily offering you a win, you have to be able to perceive it as a win for
it to be a win. Just because it's good for you does not make something a win,
and just because something's bad for you does not make it a loss. So if I
suddenly return your access to sugar it could feel like a win even though a
doctor would say actually, you've overall lost here. Does that point make
sense to you guys? Throw some yes's in, some thumbs up, some smiley faces,
excellent. So we're looking for a win-win, and the win has to be perceived as
a win, otherwise it will most likely be perceived as a loss. So just because they
gain from it is irrelevant. They have to be able to appreciate what they gained
and like that gain for it to be a genuine win-win, and that's going to be part of
what we're looking for. That's why that second stage of gathering information
is so important, because we've got to know what a win is going to look like
for them.

And if you can't achieve the win in the way they want it you can still achieve
the win in other ways, and that's going to be the key to influence. Helping
expand the way that they can win that includes whatever options that you

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want them to partake in, does that concept make sense to you guys? Are you
guys with me? Okay so with that happy note I think it's time for us to do some
exercises, so look, there's a lot of people here on this seminar right now, we
have around about 90 people, so it's huge, we're getting close to capacity on
Zoom here. In a moment we will send you off into a little micro group of three
people, and I want you to just spend some time getting to know each other,
right? So we're going to take turns in your groups, one person will be kind of
an interviewer, one person will be the interviewee, and one person will just
observe to get in to the whole vibe of things.

As for the interviewer, let's give everyone three minutes on this one. If you're
in the interviewer, I just want to find out who are you, where you're from,
why you're here, how did you get here, and what do you do? The classic sort
of questions that you use when you're getting to know someone, right? If you
run out of steam before your three minutes is up, don't worry, pass the buck
on to someone else, let them do their interview with the next person and so
on until all three have been through. If all of you three are done before the
session fully ends then get into a general conversation, just notice what that
feels like, what that looks like, where are the awkward points, where are the
smooth points, etc?

Because wherever you're at we're going to make a conversation worse just to

see what we need to make it better and then we'll progressively start making
it better, sound fair enough guys? Okay so very simply, groups of three,
interviewer, interviewee, observer, you'll keep switching roles over the next
ten minutes or so, and what you're going to do is, through the normal, classic,
rapport building, information questions like who are you? Where are you
from? What do you do? Why are you here? What are you going to get out of
this? Et cetera. Just simple sort of stuff as you normally do anyways, right?
Okay everyone, so unless there's any questions let’s just go at that, let’s go
meet each other, Oresztesz please send us away.

`````

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Making Trustworthy Connections

Igor: Okay, so welcome back everyone, who enjoyed meeting some of the
partners, let's throw some yes's in there for me? Have a nice little chat with
people? Good. Now believe it or not, what you just accomplished is the
foundation of influence, right? It's basically making contact, a connection with
another human being. Now what I want to do next is I would like to put a span
in the works so that we can slowly start building up this connection step by
step with principles in mind, and we can actually have baselines to compare
to so we know what elements are making the conversation easier, and easier
to progress. Joe already knows them, of course it will be easy to know them.

All right so what I want to do now, we're going to send you back again, alright?
This time I would like you to get to know the next, the other person in the
group, so whoever you interviewed last time, interview the other person. But
this time I want you to basically give them zero social cues. So basically you
ask the question, then you will shut up, you will keep your face blank, you
keep your voice quiet, and then you let them talk. And when they've talked
then you can ask a follow up question if you want and then just keep going
like that, but basically whilst they're talking you give zero feedback. Blank
face, quiet voice, easy to understand guys? Yes, you get the nature of this?

All right, we're going to send you in for another three minutes a piece, so 10
minutes in total. Just know ahead of time that you may not be able to fill this
three minutes and it's okay, if it gets to that point, if you just run out of stuff
to do or say then switch on to the next person. And if you still have session
time left over when all three people have been through their routine then
feel free to have a general discussion amongst yourselves how that was
different to the previous version, is that okay with you guys? Yep? Then let’s
send them away.

`````

Igor: Alrighty, it looks like everyone is back. So how was that? I've got an awkward,
anyone want to come on and have a little chat with me, anything in
particular? Otherwise I will read other things here, that was creepy, that was
flat, very awkward, difficult, challenging, so challenging, difficult to resist the

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social cues, of course. That means you're a good communicator. It was mean,
it was fun, someone is having fun with all the meanness. It felt like an FBI
interview. Which ironically the FBI no longer do FBI interviews, which I think
is very funny. It was way more work, felt very disconnected. For Polina, it
seemed very typical for Switzerland, okay interesting, let's see if we can make
you become an atypical Swiss. Dear god that was horrible, which is normal for
me, jarring, so hard not to nod or smile, took longer, it felt empty, awfully
awkward.

Look, we're getting to really similar concepts here, right? So a conversation is

more than asking a question and getting an answer, can we all agree on that
guys? Yes, thumbs up, yes's and so on? And you can really, viscerally, in your
body, feel how a conversation goes wrong when all you're focusing on is what
questions to ask and what comments to make. There is a subtext to a
conversation. A subtext that when it's present, makes everything easier. It is
the oil that greases the wheel, right? The wheel may still do the work, the
questions and the answer may still be the work of a conversation but there's
grease that keeps everything going, and that's the thing that I would like to
investigate next if that's okay with you guys, all right?

What is that grease? All you do is add some support sounds, right? The easiest
way to discuss what support sounds is let's just do it and then you will see it,
and actually it will be super simple when you see it, can I have a volunteer
please? Just start waving frantically if you're volunteering because that way
I'll just grab a waiving person. Wayne Donnelly, just give me a wave, Wayne?
Got you.

Wayne: The hand clap and the reactions.

Igor: All right, Wayne, so nice to speak to you.

Wayne: Yeah, likewise.

Igor: Just something about yourself Wayne, where are you from?

Wayne: A little place called Woy Woy, just North of Sydney in Australia.

Igor: Nice, nice. So what is Woy Woy, is that right?

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Wayne: Woy Woy.

Igor: Woy Woy. And what do you do for a living?

Wayne: I'm a hypnotherapist, stage hypnotist from your course back in 2009 with
Don.

Igor: Oh, rock and roll, nice, awesome. And what brings you here, why are you here
today?

Wayne: I just want to advance my skills.

Igor: Great.

Wayne: And increase my ability to influence.

Igor: Of course, of course, I get it. Okay time out, how did that feel to you there?
Natural, easy.

Wayne: Like I thought, you were responding, yeah.

Igor: Yes, that's the whole point right? So what do you respond with, your face,
and we'll call these support sounds like, hm, nice, okay, yeah, okay. These are
all sounds that say I'm engaged, I'm interested and this is working, keep doing
what you're doing, it is essentially encouraging the conversation without
interfering in what are you saying. Does that kind of make sense to you?

Wayne: Mm-hmm.

Igor: Super simple guys, but it makes a dramatic impact. Now that you've seen
what it feels like when it's cold as ice, lets reverse things, add these support
sounds and internally guys, turn up your enthusiasm a little bit so your
support sounds are a little bit more enthusiastic, right? Let me return you
back to the wild there, Wayne. So turn up the support, the internal feelings
of wanting to communicate, let that seep in to your support sounds and see
how that changes the experience you have of the interaction, sound straight
forward enough guys? Yes? Right, give me some thumbs up, just let me just
see your thumbs there, those of you in video. It gives me a good sense that
we're on the right track, lovely job, excellent.
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All right guys, Oresztesz please send us away for another 10 minutes, same
deal. This time we're going to turn up the support sounds so that they really
know you're engaged in a conversation, see what impact that makes. Send us
away when you're ready Oresztesz.

`````

Igor: Okay guys, so how was that? Was awesome, much more comfortable. So who
wants to make a couple of comments in terms of contrasting what happens
when you have support sounds and when you don't have support sounds,
anyone want to make a quick comment on that? Everyone's idea of extreme
is extremely different, I would agree with that. It's much more comfortable,
much easier, more natural, yes. Much more natural, more engagement. As
soon as I was allowed to make support sounds, I couldn't help but be more
expressive, 100% still shaky. Okay, Leah feel free to come on if you need to
chat about this but it could just be that if you're not naturally, have a
comfortable conversational style, this could be you learning the missing
pieces of your conversational style to build it up. If you've got a question
about that, please feel free to ask it, otherwise we'll see who can keep
building it up as the day progresses.

Gasper just wanted to say more, that's it, that's exactly the feeling we're after,
to create the conditions in which our subject, our client wants to keep talking,
right? So much better with feedback and support, I totally agree, it
encourages more talking, it was fun and tiring, interesting about that. Much
deeper, want to talk more, the support brings us to liking each other, that's
exactly right, it's part of the recipe for hypnotic rapport, this is just the basic
foundation ingredients so far, we'll put some more in in a second. It's like you
talk more freely, it's like talking with a friend. That's exactly right, and that's
why we're creating these conversational hacks to make sure the conversation
can flow as smoothly as possible. It went from awkward to fun and engaging,
warm, friendly, easy to open up.

Beautiful, I like these words, especially that you're opening up. Definitely
more engagement but some of the exaggeration was too much. Yeah, of
course Jill, this is a question of calibrating yourself. We've gone one extreme,
we've gone to the other extreme, and if we can pull ourselves back from the

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extreme to fit the conversational vibe of the person that we're with, right?
Genuinely interesting, talking flows better, felt encouraged to share more,
much more interesting and enjoyable, excellent. So it looks like we've got our
first key ingredient in our first step of the hypnotic formula. What's a hypnotic
formula? Number one, we're going to keep them talking. That is required for
trust, for getting information, and so on. Terez, if you want to just give me a
wave I'll pull you up quickly and then setup the next exercise. And then go
ahead and unmute yourself. What's up?

Terez: Is it cheating that you've already established that we have to trust each other,
that was first part of collaboration?

Igor: Of course it's cheating.

Terez: Okay.

Igor: Of course it's cheating, I have set an expectation for you guys to make it easy.
Essentially what I'm trying to do is I'm trying to simulate natural conversation
as much as possible so when you go home again, well you are home, when
you leave this part of the environment, when you talk to other people you
can tell whether you're doing your part, right? So here's what typically
happens Terez, let’s do the inverse of this, go ahead and ask me those
questions and I'm going to give you a different kind of person that you will
see and I'll show you how that makes the tools you currently have harder to
use but it's still necessary to get through the problem, all right? So go ahead
and ask me some questions.

Terez: Okay, Igor, where are you from?

Igor: I'm from Canada.

Terez: Canada, okay, so how long have you been teaching hypnosis?

Igor: Maybe 15 years.

Terez: How did you get started?

Igor: I just read a book.

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Terez: That's awesome.

Igor: Okay time out.

Terez: Gotcha.

Igor: This is feeling awkward, right?

Terez: Right, absolutely.

Igor: Right, so now this is just so we can see it at the same time, we'll do the same
thing again. Same questions, I'll be the same character, now did you notice
what happened because I'm so inhibited, do you notice what happened to
your support sounds?

Terez: Yeah, they went away.

Igor: They disappeared. So what happened is you're responding to my inhibition,

right? We're like two electromagnets, do you know what a copper coil does
when you put a positive charge to it? It creates a magnetic field.

Terez: Right.

Igor: And if you move another copper coil into its field and move it around, it starts
inducing a charge, you can actually create electricity and transfer it invisibly
through space that way, right?

Terez: Right.

Igor: We are very similar to those copper coils only instead of transferring
electricity through electromagnetism, we transfer emotions. My emotions
dampened your field, and you felt more awkward, right?

Terez: Right.

Igor: So your job is when you feel that, is to increase, you've got to make a point of
making more soothing support sounds to compensate for my lack of
conversation, does that make sense?

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Terez: Absolutely.

Igor: Would you like another go, Terez?

Terez: Absolutely.

Igor: Am I saying your name correctly, it's an unusual name so please tell me if I'm
getting it wrong.

Terez: Terez.

Igor: Terez.

Terez: It's like Perez with a T.

Igor: Terez, thank you so much. All right, so go ahead.

Terez: Okay. Igor, where are you from?

Igor: I'm from Canada.

Terez: Canada that's awesome, okay. How long have been teaching hypnosis?

Igor: 15 years.

Terez: I see, okay, 15 years.

Igor: Nice, timeout, you nailed it. You so nailed it, folks, everyone listening, can you
feel the difference from what Terez is projecting towards me now? I can
definitely feel it in my body, I'm trying really hard to be more shy and
reserved, but just that attitude is starting to open me up, does that kind of
make sense to you Terez?

Terez: It does, absolutely.

Igor: Does that answer your question?

Terez: It does.

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Igor: Good, excellent. So let me send you back in to the wild then. Go back to here,
all right so is there a standard list of questions to ask someone? Don't worry
about this right now, the start of this is real simple, who are you, where are
you from, what do you do and why are you here? Those are the standard
meeting people questions. We'll get into more knowing what questions to ask
as we develop this system, right now I just want to make sure you get what
Terez just got. Which is lack of support sounds dampen the conversations,
support sounds improve the conversations. And I am inhibitive, your
conversational partner, your subject is inhibited, you have to do the heavy
lifting just like Terez did. Right?

Joeyboi, so our job is to enhance our H+ when we notice another social

awkwardness or seeming challenge, you nailed it Joe, that's exactly right. This
is another way of translating the idea into a social context rather than a
formally hypnotic context. And Terez did a wonderful job of demonstrating
that just now, and I know he had to work for it, right? I know that my
inhibition sucked the energy out of him and tried to pull it into my space
which is inhibited, right? And he did the right thing by resisting, and he had
to resist, he had to work harder to put me into the right frame, but the work
was worth it, right? And Whimzee's nailed this idea, it's the idea of going first,
right?

Okay guys, so we've got the blankness which kills the conversation, we've got
the support sounds that opens it up. You've already seen how if I fail my
support sounds then, especially if someone's being awkward, that it will cause
me to fail to give more support sounds, they've got to go the opposite way to
make an extra effort to add more in the less someone else is talking, right?
What if it's someone who's more aggressive instead of timid, Chris, we'll
handle that separately, that is a much more advanced problem and we'll
probably only get to that when we get to the troubleshooting on the final day,
right? So please keep that in mind, but aggression is a much more advanced
problem to resolve we'll look at that towards the end of this course once you
have a wider range of tools that you can rely on to help us fix that problem,
okay?

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Demo: Enhancing Social Support Signals

Igor: What I want to do now is I want to enhance the social support signals, right?
In fact, let me just give you a quick demonstration of this, who would like to
volunteer for this right now? And I'll do this relatively mechanically so we are
building up skills easily, just start waving frantically if you're a volunteer and I
will catch someone who's waving. Nik I see you waving there. All right, go
ahead and unmute yourself Nik.

Nik: Hello, Igor.

Igor: Hi, so let me just put your volume down a little bit. Okay so Nik, tell me, where
are you from?

Nik: Oh, I'm from Canada.

Igor: From Canada? Nice, go on?

Nik: I'm from a small, I guess it's pretty big, but it's called Gatineau. Close to
Ottawa.

Igor: Close to Ottawa, okay. Go on?

Nik: Yeah, it's a nice place, it's an urban area.

Igor: Got it, thanks, okay. And what do you do in, what was it called again?

Nik: Gatineau.

Igor: Gatineau. What do you do in Gatineau?

Nik: I work at a convenience store.

Igor: Nice, all right, go on?

Nik: I also work on my play, these days. It passes the time.

Igor: Oh, go on? Okay, I was just trying him out here a little bit.

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Nik: Well-

Igor: Thanks so much for doing this.

Nik: Yeah of course.

Igor: Now notice, how did that feel? It was a little bit stilted because you know
what I'm doing, I'm just adding literally the phrase go on to the end of it with
no rhyme or reason. But how did that feel in terms of getting more details out
and so on, right? You felt a little bit of pressure, but suddenly you kind of
knew where to go, would that be fair to say?

Nik: Honestly Igor, it was so hard to keep character because, like your action just
made me want to just open up more and more.

Igor: That's it, and it's just a simple phrase, go on. I'm taking the principle of the
support sounds and I'm actually verbalizing them now. Go on, right? So here's
the rule, and any other questions, any other comments you want to make
before I release you back in to the wild?

Nik: No I'm good.

Igor: Good, thanks so much for doing that with me, let me release you back into
the group now. Go ahead and meet yourself again, Nik. Okay so what are we
doing? We're literally just tagging the phrase go on to the end of our support
sounds, right? Your client, your subjects will naturally find a point that they've
talked about, usually the last thing they've talked about, and elaborate on
that. And I actually want to let you see how simple that is when you embed
the idea of go on into the support sounds, so we are just enhancing the
principle behind the support sounds. Does that make sense to everyone? Yes?
10 minutes, same groups, feel free to switch who you are talking to again if
you want to, just to get a little experience within that little group, and then
we'll switch your roles around again after the next break, all right? So 10
minutes, Oresztesz please take us away.

`````

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Igor: Okay guys, so welcome back. How was that, was that fun? So go ahead and
put some comments in the text box here, what do you notice happening when
you tag that word go on, on top of your support sounds? What happened to
the conversation then for you? Just type some comments in here, right? So it
was fun and easy, powerful. How many times you can say go on without
actually being awkward? Of course, we'll come back to that Polina, let's talk
about that in a second but let's just get the basic principles out right here. It
was awesome, okay very good Liam, glad it's feeling better for you now.
Stephen was, go on, interesting, friendlier, it draws them out, feedback with
tone moves better, fun, I'm being heard, it's more interesting details, they
talked more. They got more spacious with more opportunities to share,
excellent point.

It keeps conversations going, Don, I totally agree with you. It started

expanding, it felt more encouraging, Pierre just saying I kind of like these
people, I like that. Open up to thinking, to have more things to say. I thought
it would be awkward but the client says it wasn't. This is the point, Chris, now
of course we've got some really simple tools right now, we're going to give
you more that will keep things going, but simple is best because you can do
them, right? Tabby found there's conversation opening up, Stephen found
that people, it felt like they were caring about me, good principle but needs
to practice absolutely, that's why we're doing it here. It seems a bit dry, if we
can come to that if we need to Eric, we're still building some things up.

It was motivating for both speaker and interviewee, excellent. I tend to talk
too much anyway, so it was nice. It was fun but it was more awkward, Alec if
you want to talk about that, I'll have a sense of what's going on there maybe
after the break. Can't help but go off on a tangent, and interesting stuff came
out of the other person, perfect. Fun, enjoyable connection, that's it, didn't
need to say go on much, beautiful because you've got the support sounds
that go and just, it's like pushing a child on a swing, right? When they come
back to you, you just gently touch them and them move them in the next
direction, that's what go on does, it's adding a little bit of energy into the
swing of the conversation, all right?

At first it was like coming up with some words but at some point it felt like I
can talk for ages, and Harold, that is the point, right? We're giving you the

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simplest tools that will prolong conversations in interesting ways. Because

that's what we want to do, our fundamental premise is we've got to keep
them talking, right? It sounds like the person, allows you to continue to the
conversation cleanly without putting anything in there. A simple go on and
the add more content, that's exactly right. The person asking questions felt
interested in what I was saying, oh, tell me more? Okay Patrick it is not about
tell me more, it's about go on right now, tell me more we're going to use
differently after the break.

For some people it gives permission to talk more, that's exactly right,
definitely more, it appears that you enjoy each person as a real human being
in our midst not an object of temporary attention. That's it Joey, we're
creating a real human connection and we need that if we're going to be a
force for good with a strong sense of hypnotic influence, right? Definitely
more appearing, to enjoy each person, oh yeah we got that one. A neutral
add on, Martin let’s talk about that a little bit after the break if we need to
get in there, we should be a little bit more than neutral, otherwise maybe
we're not quite doing it in the way I was demonstrating. We actually just had
the whole conversation only by saying tell me more, once again, please try in
the next time around to use the word go on instead, because we're going to
use tell me more slightly differently. The way you used it just now is the same
as the go on but I'm actually going to use tell me more as a separate principle,
and so I would rather use the language separately for the time being just so
we don't confuse matters, that's all. All right?

Brought more fluidity, causes concentration on one subject. Eric you're quite
right, there's way more ways of saying go on, the key here is I want to simplify
the vocabulary so that we're doing this mechanically, and even doing it
mechanically has a really good impact, and that's what I'm about to show you
guys, that it's simple stuff so that when you start using it a bit more
naturalistically, it gets even more powerful, right? Go on equals plus and,
that's exactly right, Martin. It felt a little strange, yes Jeff, I'm coming to your
question in a second. It felt a little strange saying go on, I found myself adding
interesting, go on. Oh, Jody, you're meant to say things like that, so we're not
just saying go on, you're saying using support sounds like, hm, oh, interesting,
nice, okay. And then adding go on, so using two devices, support sounds and
go on together.

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If you just use go on it kind of works, but it can still be more awkward, you
need the support sounds, that is the ocean in which the fish swims. No ocean,
no fish, no support sounds, no conversation. Then go on just lets the
conversation breathe a little bit more that's all. All right? I thought we were
just supposed to draw them out, I go the go on now, perfect. Jeff, give me a
wave and I'll bring you up. Got you, go ahead.

Jeff: So my question is if you are speaking to somebody and you get them on a
topic where they can go on and on for five minutes easily, do you interrupt
them and say go on, because that seems-

Igor: No, no, no, you just go, hm, ah, interesting.

Jeff: Okay.

Igor: That's the support, go on is specifically to add energy into the swing. Think of
the swing analogy like this, when you say, hm, interesting and so on, the child
is happily just swinging along, right? If they need an extra push, the go on puts
a little bit more energy in so they can have fun again, right? Now after break
we'll start adding other language to start directionalizing experiences, but for
now you have two super simple tools that will open up most conversations.
Support sounds, and go on, conversation naturally starts to flow, right? And
that's the key we're looking for, that's right Peter, we don't like making it
neutral but we may make it natural, that's exactly what we're looking for,
right?

Does that answer your question there, Jeff?

Jeff: Yeah, that answers the question, thank you.

Igor: All right, no worries. Okay guys, so first of all, good job, well done, right? This
is a nice place we've reached here. We'll come back to this conversational
language a bit more as we go on, go on I just got it. So before we do that
though, let’s have a quick break and then when we come back we'll pick things
up on a slightly different track and then we'll come back to the conversation
again after we've done a little bit more, okay?

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