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 Discipline , Disciplesh ip, and You
pocket guide • DISCIPLINE The best way to handle discipline issues is to avoid having
them pop up in the first place.
That can happen, by the way-and you're the key.
You can create a classroom environment that removes
chaos and confrontation. That prompts children to
cooperate as you teach. That lets you have fun being a
teacher rather than a referee.
There are a few simple things you can do-right now-to
create a less stressful classroom. A classroom you and your
children will enjoy more-and that helps you meet your
teaching goals. This Pocket Guide to Discipline is packed
with dozens of those priceless tips.
The words discipline and discipleship both come from the
Latin word discere meaning "to learn." When you provide
calm, intentional discipline you create a space where kids
can dive into lessons and learn.
But even better, you model God's patient love and disciple
children to know, love, and follow Jesus.
Get ready to discipline and disciple. You'll change lives!
Why Children Misbehav e ...

\
• ~

ATTENTION BOREDOM CONFUSION

Kids crave attention-and not Children not engaged in your Fuzzy rules, lax enforcement,
just yours. If acting up earns lesson will find something and no consequences
classmates' attention and interesting elsewhere-ofte n are guaranteed to spark
applause. kids won't mind by misbehaving. misbehavior. Kids get
risking your displeasure. confused: Do the rules
SOLUTION: Deliver fast-paced,
SOLUTION: Don't reinforce kid-involving lessons that matter or not?
misbehavior with too much engage all five senses. Prepare SOLUTION: Set clear
attention: briefly address well so you're not lost in expectations and enforce
it, and move on. Proactively your teacher guide instead of them-fairly and consistently.
give attention to positive making eye contact with kids. State your goal for each lesson
behaviors verbally and with In short: Make it interesting! upfront and meet it.
nods and smiles.
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CRAFT CLEAR CLASSROOM EXPECTATIONS

• Create expectations together.

- ,,I Decide what sort of behavior you'd like to see, and then share the big picture
with your class. Ask kids to suggest positive examples of that behavior. Sum up
their ideas into three to [Link] easily remembered statements, such as "Be prompt,
Be polite, Be prepared." Or "Be respectful, Be responsible, Be reverent." Post
expectations where they're easily seen.

j
• Practice expectations together.
, I Ask children to describe what the shared expectations look, sound, and feel
• -Li 1
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_:~:::-:·\ -t:•··- .,.. like. Gently remind kids when their behavior misses the mark, and [Link]
behavior that's on target. Review the expectations list occasionally, and model it
constantly. If necessary, pause to role-play common situations to demonstrate
how to meet expectations.

• Enforce expectations together.

Consistency counts, so enforce classroom expectations quickly, kindly, and
fairly. Children will test you-it's just human nature-so expect it. How you
correct misbehavior may be the most important and memorable part of your
lesson: You'll model grace, forgiveness, and reconciliation.

pocket guide a> DISCIPLINE \-

 ~ • PROVIDE STRUCTURE-AND SURPRISES!
Boredom-busting lessons are the easiest way to keep kids engaged,
excited, and behaving well. Three suggestions:

• Make it predi ctabl e.

100lS
o1 the
1• Kids need structu re. At the start of each session , briefly outline what you'll
do so childre n know what to expect . Includ e activit ies that satisfy a variety of
learner s: those who crave movem ent, those who enjoy workin g togethe r. and
those who like solo learnin g.

lRADE • Make it unpr edict able.

Includ e unexpe cted twists to your regula r routine . Do you always collect an
offerin g? Then pass a shoe, or let kids lob their quarte rs into a target. Wear
your clothes inside out. Bring in a guest. Play a game in the middle of your
lesson. Surpris e!

• Keep the first thing first.

Your goal is to help childre n know, love, and follow Jesus- to have a growing
relatio nship with him. In all you do. build in ways for that to happen .
a
~ • BE PREPARED
Ready to teach this Sunday?
GIVE LESS INSTEAD OF MORE This che cklis t will help you know:
Raise your righ t hand. Read the follo wing alou
d: D You're growing in your relat ions hip with
"I, [your nam e here ], will no long er rush to com plete God -you 're not alone!
every activity prin ted in my curr iculu m. I will rem D You've carefully read the less on at least thre e
emb er
that I'm not in the busi ness of com pleti ng lesso ns; time s-on Monday, Wednesday, and agai n
I'm in
the busi ness of help ing chil dren know and love God
. I will Satu rday evening.
watch for "God Mom ents "-m ome nts whe n a child
's eyes D You've pray ed for every child and your self to
light up with unde rstan ding or the child 's hear t softe
ns mee t God in your lesso n.
with the warm th of God 's love -and I'll paus e to let
God
do the work he wan ts to do. I'll forg o fillin g every
minu te
D You've gath ered all less on supp lies and have
with my word s and inste ad give chil dren amp le time prac ticed usin g them .
to
cons ider and appl y the Bibl e truth they discover." D Your room is well lit, com forta ble, and
Ther e. Con side r your self depu tized . child -frie ndly .
D You've remo ved unne cess ary furn iture
and distr actio ns.
D You've lear ned child ren's nam es, cele brat ed
thei r birth days , and met pare nts.

:"
"
l!CI
D You've conn ecte d with your teac hing team .
D You're reste d and read y to have som e fun.

II

,
pock et guid e Iii) DISCIPLINE \ 0
 ~

t ' SHARE CLASSROOM CONTROL WITH YOUR KIDS

When you give children in your class some control, they no longer
fight you for all control-a nd you're happier. You also answer the
unspoken question at the heart of many discipline issues: "Who's in
charge here?" The answer: Everyone is, but you're clearly the leader.
Offer your kids choices. But frame the options so all options work for you.
Remembe r: Once your class makes a decision, you've got to live with it.
Examp les where choices work well:
• ''Which of these two praise songs would you like to sing?"
• "Would you rather work alone or with a partner?"
• "Here are two service projects. Which would you rather do?"
• "What should we do first: make a craft or play a game?"
PRAY
Examp les where choices may be disaste rs:
• "So, like. what does everyone want to do today?" • Pray before you prepare your lesson.
• "Do you want to clean up that mess?" • Pray for wisdom as you teach.
• "How about everyone just calms down, OK?" • Pray for children as they drag. dance.
• "Do you want to listen or swing from the light?" or dazzle into your classroom.
(Guess what they'll choose.) • Pray for children during the week.
• Pray without ceasing.
1. LOGICAL CONSEQUENCES 2. ISOLATION ... SORTA 3. EVAPORATING PRIVILEGES
If Jack "accidentally" spills his cup Skip the timeout chair. Instead, If a child breaks one of the
of fruit juice, he cleans it up. This recruit a compassionate adult classroom expectations. let it
approach helps children see the to be the "go to" person for cost him-or the class-a favorite
impact of their actions and solve significant discipline challenges. activity. '•If the drama costumes
any problems that follow. This person's job: listen to, aren't put away quickl:7. we [Link]"t
PROS: This approach is respectful, affum, and pray with the child- have time for a game·· tends to
directly connects consequences to then return the child to class. refocus positive behavior.
misbehavior, and gives children a PROS: This kind of attention PROS: You remain calm and
way to "fix" problems they create. helps children refocus. The reasonable, and children correct
discussion (and prayer) can help their misbehavior... or that of a
you understand what's causing classmate.
misbehavior.
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PUT IT ALL INTO .....

PRACTICE
"I CAN'T CONTROL THE KIDS."
Location, location, location. One way to keep wigglers from squirming into
a different orbit is to casually have the most active kids sit closest to you.
That way you can gently redirect with a calm hand on a shoulder. You won't
interrupt your lesson flow or embarrass children.
Remove places for chatterers to "hide" by seating children in a circle on
the floor. You'll most easily make eye contact with children directly across
from you, so plop your most verbal kids there. You'll encourage them to be
respectful with simple eye contact.
If you have children who constantly distract each other, tell them they'll get
one warning per week. After that, you'll separate them.
And program in chances to move every three to five minutes. Kids' ears shut
off when their hands, feet, and bottoms get restless!

pocket guide If> DISCIPLINE I 0

PRACTICE
"KIDS SAY MY CLASS IS 'LAME.' " ---
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5
Compared to the Disney Channel, your class is
lame. No special effects. Cheap soundtrack.
And who picked that outfit? Call wardrobe!
Focus on giving kids what they can't get on TV:
an adult who listens and who's investing in them.
~
And truth wrapped in fun, relational learning.
Focus on relationship, not on being cool. Your
kids will warm up when they trust that you're
authentically in their corner.

D
• 3 "KIDS TALK-
BUT NOT ABOUT THE TOPIC." •
II

Some children love playing "Derail the Teache~.~:Z)}~

But you can't ignore a child-even a class ?low1~t#;;t
whose comments have never been relevant.~ ···t1;::':::."' ·
~-·- ·. ;.' 2-f~;_·..
QUICK FIXES: ' •• - ::~:tif•~-- "HELP! MY KIDS HAVE A.D.D.!"
\ .: •,·• .".· . ' \ ~ ; :·

• Occasionally, before you begin a lesson,. i;',:f,J~it!: If a parent tells you her child has Attention
express your expectation that· any que~_ti,o_n_si;_'·)"' Deficit Disorder or any other challenge.
asked will be about the lesson topic. • • :::~- :~~j•\!!;- .. find out what you can do to support that
..• ·t •.
•Prepare open-ended questions (questions -, ]::.::~· child and family.
that can't be answered "yes" or "no") that Ask parents what you can do to give their
allow kids to talk with you or a partner, and children the best possible experience in
keep your questions focused on the topic. your class-they'll have specific insights
• If the question is aimed to distract, say, and suggestions.
"Great question. Remind me at snack time And for each child with special needs in
and you and I can discuss it then." your class, recruit an additional helper.
Bonus: Learn to appreciate curiosity. You want
kids to be engaged in learning, and that's going
to prompt questions.

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PUT IT ALL INTO .................................

5
~
"I HATE DISCIPLINING KIDS, SO I AVOID IT."
Yet, without discipline your classroom is chaotic. And if you fail to discipline,
you rob children of a chance to discover Bible truth and grow in their
relationship with God. Hmm ....
• Consider: Did a poorly handled discipline situation in the past hurt or
shame you? Realize you don't have to handle discipline the same way.
• Practice: Decide now-while you're calm, cool, and collected-ho w you
want to handle discipline challenges you're likely to meet. Rehearse what
you'll say and how you'll say it.
• Separate: Kids aren't the problem; their behavior is. Calmly correct
behavior; always [Link] children.
• Embrace your role: You're a leader, not a buddy. You'll naturally become
friends with students as you do everything possible to lead them to a
relationship with Jesus.
Uh, oh ... your classroom is running rough. Stalling
out. Sluggish. Time for a tuneup! Here are common
~ R£M/ND£R: Your classroom is unique, so some
solutions may need tweaking to work for you. That's
classroom cha Ilenges-and quick, proven solutions. fine. Modify these recommendations however you
wish. What matters most is that you're prayerfully
looking to more closely connect with children-and
model God's love in discipline situations!

0 I GIVE IT THE GAS ...

BUT KIDS DON'T MOVE.
* Make lessons age-appropriate-if you're =
I START THE CAR ...
BUT THEY WON'T GET IN.
* Model respectful behavior toward all
even a bit off target your lessons will flop. (See children-especially those who are defiant or
p. 16 for help.)* Crank up your enthusiasm- disrespectful. * Look for trends-are there
expect great things.* Build kids' involvement triggers that prompt disrespectful actions or
into your lessons through partner discussions, comments? * Don't engage in a verbal debate
dramas, and games.* Start your class with with a child who's vying for attention with
movement to get kids awake and focused. *
"backtalk." Don't take disrespect personally.

pocket guide B> DISCIPLINE \ G

Q ONCE THE SQUEAKING STARTS ...
THE FENDERS FALL OFF.
* Keep misbehavior from escalating by
e I FEEL STUCK ...
ALL FOUR OF MY TIRES ARE FLAT.
* You can't do ministry when you're
exhausted. Simplify your Sunday morning
responding quickly, consistently, and
*
fairly. Stop speaking, turn toward the *
schedule so you arrive in class rested. Ask
misbehaving child, and wait until the for or recruit a helper-you may be stretched
1nisbehavior stops. Then thank the child too thin during class.* Get energized through
*
and resume teaching. Praise your class regular devotions. * Take a sabbatical if you're
teaching out of duty rather than love.
when it honors your shared expectations.

0 MY KIDS ARE STUCK ...

IN HIGH GEAR.
* Tap that energy! Inject fast-action games
and activities throughout your lesson-not just
*
at the end. Allow children to [Link] by giving
them small items such as small foam balls
or clay, so long as the manipulatives aren't
*
a distraction. Consider: Are the children
bored? Ifso, spiceupyourtea ching.
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~~~~;r~it pocket guide Ill> DISCIPLINE 15
KIDS: The Inside Works

* thrive on group activities *want to be part of a group *spend a lot of time with
one best friend* thrive on
* have a strong sense of * naturally avoid interaction
organized games and group
competition* are partial to
same-sex friendships
with the opposite sex* enjoy
extended group activities
*
activities usually prefer
same-sex friendships

* express feelings with * feelings are hurt easily *are subject to strong fears
physical action* crave * are sensitive to criticism from (losing parents, rejection)
individual attention and adults * are developing a sense * are strongly influenced by
affirmation* want to be first of empathy for others heroes and role models
* are eager to please * have a strong sense offairness * are anxious for peer approval

* understand God's love * recognize the difference *want everything to be fair

through personal experiences between right and wrong* able *are capable of making spiritual
* do not comprehend the to make deliberate choices about choices and following God's will
spiritual nature of God * do not actions * accept that they can't *are beginning to test beliefs
comprehend abstract concepts understand everything about God against experiences