EXPLORING STRESS AND COPING THROUGH THE LENS OF POSITIVE
PSYCHOLOGY
REFLECTIVE JOURNAL:
A few weeks ago, I went through a challenging and emotionally draining period due
to a miscommunication with someone I care deeply about. They were visiting family, and
between their busy schedule and some inevitable communication gaps, things quickly turned
south between us. At first, I hadn’t anticipated that their lack of availability would impact me
so strongly. But as days went by, their distant responses, delayed texts, and seemingly
detached tone made me feel increasingly anxious. I found myself obsessing over whether I
was somehow being too much, too demanding, or simply a burden they didn’t want to handle.
In my frustration and insecurity, I started acting out. Instead of calmly explaining how I felt, I
ended up lashing out. I said things I didn’t mean, things that were born out of my own
anxiety and fear of being abandoned. My thoughts spiralled and I was convinced that this
was a sign that they didn’t care about me anymore. Every message that went unanswered felt
like confirmation of my worst fears. I started catastrophizing, assuming the worst-case
scenario in every possible way, telling myself things like, “They don’t care,” “I’m too much
for them,” and, “They’re going to leave me.” I was also avoiding real communication,
burying my genuine emotions under a mix of anger and defensiveness. Rather than trying to
work through things rationally, I tried to suppress how hurt and scared I was. I stopped
eating, I couldn’t sleep, and I was constantly on the verge of breaking down. I was crying
uncontrollably and had repeated panic attacks. I felt helpless and small. Every attempt I
made to reach out felt strained, like I was only pushing them further away, which only added
to my mounting sense of dread.
However , after a few stressful and anxiety infused days, I realised I couldn’t go on
like this. The stress and negativity were consuming me. I decided to take a step back and
consider things more calmly. Instead of focusing on my insecurities, I needed to remind
myself of the good things, the connection we have, the times they’ve been there for me, and
the reality that sometimes people just need a bit of space. I started to breathe and listen,
telling myself to be patient and mindful of my words. I worked on viewing the situation from
their perspective, trying to understand the external pressures they were under rather than
assuming it was all about me. I learned that, in moments like these, resilience is about
choosing to focus on strength rather than fear. It wasn’t easy, but it was the first step toward
regaining some balance.
RESEARCH AND APPLICATION:
● Resilience: The ability to bounce back from stress and adversity, resilience
involves cognitive flexibility, social connections, and proactive coping skills. It’s linked
to better mental health outcomes and greater life satisfaction by helping individuals
reframe challenges and maintain focus on positive outcomes.
● Optimism: A tendency to expect positive outcomes, optimism reduces
perceived stress by promoting constructive thinking patterns. Research shows that
optimistic individuals cope better with adversity and recover more quickly, as they are
more likely to engage in adaptive coping strategies.
● Mindfulness: Defined as a non-judgmental awareness of the present moment,
mindfulness improves stress management by promoting acceptance and reducing
rumination. It has been linked to lower levels of stress hormones and improved emotion
regulation, enabling individuals to process stressors without becoming overwhelmed.
● Gratitude: Acknowledging and appreciating positive aspects of life, gratitude
enhances well-being and lowers stress by shifting focus away from stressors. Practicing
gratitude is associated with improved mood, healthier relationships, and greater resilience
against daily stress.
● Cognitive reframing is a key concept in positive psychology that involves
changing the way we perceive and interpret stressful situations. By identifying and
challenging negative thought patterns, individuals can shift their perspective to view
challenges as opportunities for growth and learning. This practice not only reduces stress
but also enhances resilience, enabling people to cope more effectively with life's
pressures.
Mindfulness: In the pursuit of happiness and stress reduction, the practice of
mindfulness has emerged as a beacon of hope for many. Mindfulness encourages individuals
to anchor themselves in the present moment, acknowledging and accepting thoughts, feelings,
and sensations without judgement. This approach fosters a heightened awareness that can
interrupt the cycle of stress. At its core, mindfulness is about cultivating a deep, non-reactive
awareness of the present moment. For instance, during a mindfulness meditation session, one
might focus on the sensation of breath entering and exiting the body, observing each
inhalation and exhalation without attempting to alter them. Part of this practice involves
accepting things as they are, which can be exemplified by recognizing feelings of anxiety
without trying to push them away or immediately solve the underlying issue. Research
(Davidson, R. J., & Kaszniak, A. W, 2015). has shown that mindfulness can lead to changes
in the brain associated with decreased stress and increased emotional well-being. Areas like
the amygdala, known for its role in the stress response, become less reactive after
mindfulness training. On a physiological level, mindfulness has been found to lower blood
pressure, reduce chronic pain, and alleviate gastrointestinal difficulties, all of which can be
exacerbated by stress.
Reframing Thoughts to Reduce Stress: At its core, cognitive reframing involves
the conscious shift from a negative to a positive viewpoint. This technique involves
recognizing and restructuring negative thought patterns to foster a more adaptive and
optimistic mindset. Research indicates that cognitive reframing can significantly reduce the
perceived intensity of stressors, thereby enhancing emotional resilience (Lazarus & Folkman,
1984). By reinterpreting stressful situations as challenges rather than threats, individuals can
activate more constructive coping strategies, leading to improved psychological well-being
(Tugade & Fredrickson, 2004). A study by Meichenbaum (2017) highlights that individuals
who engage in cognitive reframing are better equipped to manage stress, as they can view
setbacks as opportunities for growth and learning. This shift not only mitigates anxiety but
also fosters a sense of empowerment and control. Additionally, cognitive reframing
techniques, such as positive self-talk and gratitude journaling, have been empirically
supported to enhance overall mental health (Seligman et al., 2005).
Resilience: Defined as the capacity to adapt well in the face of adversity, resilience
involves a dynamic process of coping and recovery, which enables individuals to bounce
back from stressful experiences (Masten, 2001). Research indicates that resilient individuals
exhibit higher levels of emotional regulation and adaptive coping strategies, allowing them to
manage stress more effectively (Tugade & Fredrickson, 2004). Moreover, resilience is
associated with positive psychological outcomes, including enhanced life satisfaction and
well-being, which serve as protective factors against stress (Ryff, 1989). Furthermore,
resilience fosters a growth mindset, encouraging individuals to view challenges as
opportunities for personal development rather than insurmountable obstacles (Dweck, 2006).
How to integrate in daily life:
● Cognitive Reframing: This involves changing the way one perceives a
stressful situation. By identifying negative thought patterns and challenging them,
individuals can develop a more positive and realistic outlook. For example, instead of
thinking, "I can't handle this," one might say, "I've handled tough situations before, and I
can learn from this experience."
● Building Strong Relationships: Social support is a cornerstone of resilience.
Cultivating strong, positive relationships with family, friends, and colleagues can provide
a network of support that one can lean on during tough times. An example of this is
joining a community group or club where members encourage and help each other.
● Developing Problem-Solving skills: Resilient individuals approach problems
with a solution-oriented mindset. They break down overwhelming challenges into
manageable parts and take action. A person might list potential steps to overcome a
financial setback and then tackle each step one by one.
● Self-Care Practices: Taking care of one's physical and mental health is
essential for resilience. Regular exercise, adequate sleep, healthy eating, and mindfulness
practices like meditation can all contribute to a stronger, more resilient self. For example,
someone might adopt a daily meditation practice to reduce stress and improve focus.
PERSONAL COPING STRATEGY PLAN :
To effectively manage stress, I will develop a coping strategy that integrates cognitive
reframing, mindfulness, and resilience. My first step will be to practise cognitive reframing
by identifying negative thoughts associated with stressors. For example, if I feel
overwhelmed by a project deadline, I will consciously reframe my perspective: instead of
thinking, “I will never finish this,” I will remind myself, “I can break this down into
manageable tasks and take it one step at a time.” This shift in thinking aims to reduce anxiety
and promote a sense of control. In addition to cognitive reframing, I will incorporate
mindfulness practices into my daily routine. This will involve dedicating at least ten minutes
each day to mindfulness meditation or yoga, focusing on my breath, and allowing my
thoughts to come and go without judgment. I will also practice mindfulness during everyday
activities, such as eating or walking, to stay present and grounded. This will help me cultivate
a greater awareness of my thoughts and feelings, reducing their impact on my stress levels.
Building resilience will be a key focus of my strategy. I plan to engage in activities that foster
resilience, such as setting realistic goals, maintaining a supportive social network, and
reflecting on past challenges I have overcome. By recognizing my strengths and past
successes, I will reinforce my ability to handle future stressors.
To track and measure the effectiveness of these strategies, I will maintain a daily
journal where I document my stress levels, thoughts, and feelings. I will use self-assessment
scales, such as rating my stress levels from 1 to 10, and note any changes over time.
Additionally, I will reflect weekly on my progress, identifying which strategies worked best
and areas for improvement. This combination of journaling and self-assessment will provide
valuable insights, helping me adapt and enhance my coping strategies as needed.
REFERENCES:
Dweck, C. S. (2006). Mindset: The new psychology of success. Random House.
Masten, A. S. (2001). Ordinary magic: Resilience processes in development. American
Psychologist, 56(3), 227-238.
Reyes, M. E., et al. (2015). Resilience training: A study of stress management and
psychological health. Journal of Mental Health, 24(3), 156-164.
Ryff, C. D. (1989). Happiness is everything, or is it? Explorations on the meaning of
psychological well-being. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 57(6),
1069-1081.
Tugade, M. M., & Fredrickson, B. L. (2004). Resilient individuals use positive emotions to
bounce back from negative emotional experiences. Journal of Personality and Social
Psychology, 86(2), 320-333.
Lieberman, M. D. (2013). Social : Why our brains are wired to connect. Oxford University
Press.. (2021).
Seligman, M. E. P. (2002). Authentic happiness: Using the new positive psychology to realize
your potential for lasting fulfilment. Nicholas Brealey Publishing.
Seaward BL. Cognitive restructuring: Reframing. Managing Stress: Principles and Strategies
for Health and Well-Being. 8th ed. Burlington, Mass.: Jones & Bartlett Learning;
2018.
Rosenfeld AJ. The neuroscience of happiness and well-being. Child and Adolescent
Psychiatric Clinics of North America. 2019;28:137.