Chapter 7

Expanding Social Horizons: Socioemotional Development in Middle Childhood

I. Socialization
A. Socialization is defined as teaching children the values, roles, and behaviors of their culture. It
is a major goal of all peoples and is influenced by family, peers, and the media.
B. As children become socialized, they begin to understand more about other people.
II. Family Relationships
A. The family as a system
1. The family structure evolved as a way to protect and nurture young children during their
development.
2. Earlier theorists held the view that parents directly and indirectly determine their children’s
development, but now theorists believe that families form a system of interacting
elements.
3. The family itself is embedded in other social systems that can affect family dynamics, either
directly or indirectly.
B. Dimensions and styles of parenting
1. Parenting can be described in terms of general dimensions that represent stable aspects of
parental behavior.
2. The degree of warmth and responsiveness expressed by parents to their children differs.
a. Warm parents are involved with their children, respond to their emotional needs, spend
considerable time with them, enjoy hearing their children experiences, and see when
their children are upset and try to comfort them.
b. Uninvolved parents seem more focused on their own needs, aren’t interested in their
children’s daily activities, pay little attention to their children’s emotional states, and
don’t try to comfort them when they’re upset.
3. The amount of control parents exert over their children differs.
a. Some parents are dictatorial and try to regulate every facet of their children’s lives,
while others exert little or no control over their children.
b. Effective control involves setting appropriate standards, enforcing them, and trying to
anticipate conflicts. When parents have reasonable expectations for their children and
keep tabs on their activities, their children tend to be better adjusted.
4. Combining warmth and control yields four prototypic dimensions of parenting:
a. Authoritarian parents are controlling, but uninvolved.
b. Authoritative parents are fairly controlling, but are also responsive to their children.
c. Indulgent-permissive parents love, but exert little control.
d. Indifferent-uninvolved parents are neither warm nor controlling.
5. Authoritative parenting seems best for children, for both cognitive and social development.
Children thrive on a parental style that combines control, warmth, and affection.
a. Children with authoritative parents tend to have higher grades and are responsible,
self-reliant, and friendly.
b. Children with authoritarian parents are often unhappy, have low self-esteem, and are
frequently overly aggressive.
c. Children with permissive parents are often impulsive and have little self-control.
d. Children with uninvolved parents often do poorly in school and are aggressive.
6. Parenting styles vary within cultures based on the parent’s socioeconomic status (SES) and
income.
a. Parents with a lower SES tend to be more controlling and more punitive.
 b. Due to their limited resources, parents with lower SES often lead more stressful lives
and are far more likely to live in neighborhoods where violence, drugs, and crime are
commonplace.
c. They may be too stressed to invest the energy needed for authoritative parenting.
d. Parents with a higher SES tend to be more authoritative.
7. Parental behavior influences children’s development.
a. Direct instruction involves telling a child what to do, when, and why.
1. Direct instruction paired with parental “coaching” helps children master social
and emotional skills.
b. Modeling combined with young children’s observational learning leads to imitation.
1. Observational learning can also produce counterimitation, learning what should
not be done by observing the behavior.
c. Feedback can be used by parents to indicate whether a behavior is appropriate and
should continue or is inappropriate and should stop.
C. Influences of the marital system
1. Research indicates that chronic parental conflict is harmful for children.
2. Parental conflict affects children’s development through three distinct mechanisms:
a. Children feel anxious, frightened, and sad.
b. Parental conflict spills over to parent–child relationship.
c. Constant parental conflict prevents parents from being able to invest in high-quality
parenting.
3. Forces outside the family can influence parenting and children’s development.
a. Parent’s lack of job security can lead to a decrease in the child’s self-esteem and an
increase in concentrate problems.
b. Work-related stress is another factor that can influence children’s development,
leading to less effective parenting, less tolerant and accepting, and increased conflict.
D. Children’s contributions: reciprocal influence
1. Two characteristics of children influence how their parents treat them.
a. Age. Parenting changes as children grow.
b. Temperament and behavior. A child’s temperament can have a powerful effect on
parental behavior and vice versa; children’s behavior helps determine how parents treat
them, and the resulting parental behavior influences children’s behavior, which in turn
causes parents to again change their behavior.
E. Siblings
1. The birth of a sibling can be stressful for older children, particularly among younger
children, and when parents ignore their older child’s needs.
2. One of the benefits of a sibling’s birth is that fathers become more involved with their older
children, as mothers must devote more time to a newborn.
3. Siblings get along better when they are of the same sex.
4. Sibling relationships generally improve as the younger child approaches adolescence
because siblings begin to perceive one another as equals.
5. Parents contribute to the quality of sibling relationships, both directly from parenting itself
and indirectly from the quality of the parents’ relationship with each other.
F. Adopted children
1. The best estimate is that 2-4% of U.S. children are adopted.
2. Most adoptive parents are middle-class European Americans.
3. Until the 1960s, most adopted children were white, but parents have begun to adopt
children from other races and countries.
4. Adoption of children with special needs has become more common.
5. “Adopted child syndrome” is a myth.
 a. Compared to children living with biological parents, adopted children are quite similar
in terms of temperament, attachment, self-esteem, and cognitive development.
b. Adopted children are more prone school adjustment issues and to conduct disorders.
c. Problems are more common when children are adopted at an older age and when their
care before adoption was poor.
G. Impact of birth order
1. Parents of first-born children have high expectations, are more affectionate and more
punitive toward their first-borns.
2. First-borns tend to have higher IQ scores and are more likely to go to college.
3. First-borns are more willing to conform to parents’ and adults’ requests.
4. Only children were found to succeed more in school and to have higher levels of
intelligence, leadership, autonomy, and maturity.
5. Comparisons in China between only children and children with siblings often find no
differences; when differences are found, the advantage usually goes to the only child.
6. Contrary to the popular stereotype, only children aren’t “spoiled brats.” Instead, only
children are, for the most part, much like children who grow up with siblings.
III. Parent–Child Relationships Gone Awry: Child Maltreatment
A. Maltreatment of children comes in many forms:
1. Physical abuse involves assault that leads to injuries.
2. Sexual abuse involves fondling, intercourse, or other sexual behaviors.
3. Psychological abuse involves ridicule, rejection, or humiliation.
4. Neglect occurs when children do not receive adequate food, clothing, or medical care.
B. It is estimated that approximately 3/4 million children annually suffer maltreatment or neglect.
About 75% are neglected, 15% are abused physically, 10% are abused sexually, and 5% are
maltreated psychologically.
C. Many factors contribute to child abuse:
1. Three important factors determine if a child is a likely target for abuse.
a. Cultural factors:
1. Cultural attitude towards physical punishment.
2. Poverty. Because a lack of money increases the stresses of daily life, children
living in poverty are more likely to receive maltreatment from their parents.
3. Social isolation. Abuse is more likely when families are socially isolated from
other relatives or neighbors.
b. Parental factors:
1. Parents who maltreat their children often were maltreated themselves, use
ineffective parenting techniques, have unrealistic expectations, and often believe
that they are powerless to control their children.
2. In families where abuse occurs, the couple’s interactions are often unpredictable,
unsupportive, and unsatisfying for both husbands and wives.
c. Child factors:
1. Infants and preschoolers are more often abused than older children.
2. Children who are frequently ill are more often abused.
3. Stepchildren are another group at risk for abuse.
D. Effects of abuse on children
1. Children who are abused often lag behind in social and emotional development.
2. The cognitive development and academic performance (lower grades and test scores) in
such children is often disturbed.
3. Abused children exhibit school-related behavior problems.
4. Abuse leads to depression, suicide, and perpetrating abuse on spouses or children.
E. Resiliency from abuse
1. Several factors protect children from the damaging effects of abuse.
 a. Ego-resilience, which denotes children’s ability to respond adaptively and
resourcefully to new situations, is one factor that protects children.
b. A positive mother–child relationship is another preventive factor.
2. Eliminating child maltreatment requires many different approaches.
a. American attitudes toward “acceptable” levels of punishment and poverty would have
to change.
b. Parents need counseling and training in parenting skills.
c. Parents require social support.
d. Early childhood intervention programs are a useful tool that can help with prevention.
e. Maltreatment is typically a consequence of ignorance and burden, not malice.
IV. Peers
A. Friendships
1. Friendship is a voluntary relationship between two people involving mutual liking.
2. The key elements of friendships for younger children are that they like each other and enjoy
playing together.
3. For older children, trust and assistance are additional factors in friendship.
4. With adolescence comes another layer of complexity to friendships:
a. Trust becomes more important in adolescent friendships.
b. The emergence of intimacy in adolescent friendships means that friends come to be
seen as sources of social and emotional support.
c. Hand in hand with intimacy is loyalty.
5. Friendships are more common between children similar in race, sex, and gender, as well as
similar attitudes towards school, recreation, and the future.
6. Developing opposite-sex friendships does happen with some children:
a. Boys and girls are equally likely to have opposite-sex friendships.
b. Children with same- and opposite-sex friendships tend to be very well adjusted.
c. Children with only opposite-sex friendships tend to be unpopular, less competent
academically and socially, and have lower self-esteem.
7. Several factors account for the differences in the quality and longevity of friendships:
a. Some friendships are brief because children lack the social skills to sustain them.
b. Some friendships end because, when conflicts arise, children are more concerned about
their own interests and are unwilling to compromise or negotiate.
c. Friendships end when children discover that their needs and interests aren’t as similar
as they thought initially.
d. Children with good friends cope better with life stresses, are less likely to be
victimized by peers, and have greater self-worth as young adults.
e. Sometimes friends spend much of their time discussing each other’s personal
problems, which is knows as co-rumination, which strengthens girls’ friendships but
also puts them at risk for greater depression and anxiety.
f. Aggressive children often encourage each other’s aggressive behavior.
g. Teens engaging in risky behavior often reinforce each other’s risky behavior.
B. Groups
1. Older children and adolescents often form cliques - small groups of like-minded children or
adolescents who are friends and tend to be similar in age, sex, race, and attitudes.
2. A crowd is a larger mixed-sex group of older children or adolescents who have similar
values and attitudes, and are known by a common label.
a. Some crowds have higher status than others, and members of higher-status crowds
often have higher self-esteem than members of lower-status crowds.
b. When parents practice authoritative parenting, their children become involved with
crowds that endorse adult standards of behavior. When their parents’ style is neglectful
 or permissive, children are less likely to identify with adult standards of behavior and,
instead, join crowds with negative behaviors (e.g., drug addicts).
3. Common to most groups is a dominance hierarchy, a well-defined structure headed by a
leader to whom all other members of the group defer. Physical power and individual traits
that relate to the group’s main function determine hierarchy.
4. Peer pressure is often characterized as an irresistible, harmful force. It can be positive,
urging peers to participate in school activities, and is most powerful when the standards for
appropriate behavior are not clear-cut.
C. Popularity and rejection
1. Popular and rejected children can be placed in one of five categories:
a. Popular children are liked by many classmates.
1. They are skilled academically and socially.
2. They are good students who are usually friendly, cooperative, and helpful.
3. They are more skilled at communicating and better at integrating themselves into
an ongoing conversation or play session.
b. Rejected children are disliked by many classmates.
1. Socially awkward, aggressive children are often rejected because they rely on an
aggressive interpersonal style.
2. These children are not only overly aggressive; they are also hyperactive, socially
unskilled, and unable to regulate their emotions.
3. Other rejected children are shy, withdrawn, timid, and lonely.
c. Controversial children are both liked and disliked by classmates.
d. Average children are liked and disliked by some classmates, but without the intensity
found for popular, rejected, or controversial children.
e. Neglected children are ignored by classmates.
2. Peer rejection can be traced to the influence of parents.
a. Friendly and cooperative parents demonstrate effective social skills, whereas
belligerent and combative parents demonstrate tactics that are much less effective.
b. Parents contribute to their children’s social skills and popularity through their
disciplinary practices.
1. Inconsistent discipline is associated with antisocial, aggressive behavior.
2. Consistent punishment that does not rely on power assertion but is tied to parental
love and affection is more likely to promote social skills.
c. The origins of rejection can be traced to parenting: socially awkward, aggressive
children are rejected because they rely on an aggressive interpersonal style.
D. Aggressive children and their victims
1. Researchers have identified three forms of aggressive behavior:
a. Instrumental aggression is when a child uses aggression to achieve a goal.
b. Hostile aggression is unprovoked, and its primary goal is to intimidate, harass, and
humiliate.
c. Relational aggression is when children try to hurt others by undermining their social
relationships.
2. Children’s tendencies to behave aggressively are stable over time.
a. Some of the long-terms outcomes of childhood aggressing include poor adjustment to
high school, unemployment, and violent behavior in adulthood.
3. Chronic victims of aggression are often lonely, anxious, and depressed, tend to dislike
school, and have low self-esteem.
4. Two types of individuals are more likely to become victims themselves:
a. Victims of aggression become victims because they are aggressive themselves. They
often overreact and are restless, easily irritated, and easily baited.
 b. Withdrawn-submissive victims tend to be withdrawn and submissive, and either
unwilling or unable to defend themselves from their overly aggressive peers.
5. Victims can be taught ways of dealing with aggression.
a. They can be encouraged not to respond when insulted and not show fear.
b. Increasing a child’s self-esteem makes them feel less tolerant of personal attacks.
c. Victims should foster friendships with peers.
V. Electronic Media
A. Television
1. The typical U.S. high school graduate has watched 20,000 hours of TV, the equivalent of
two full years of TV.
2. Watching violent television leads to more aggressive behavior, whereas prosocial TV leads
to more socially skilled behavior.
3. Critics argue that TV leads to poor concentration, short attention spans, reduces creativity
and passive, lazy thinkers. Yet research does not consistently support these criticisms.
4. The biggest impact of TV is the content of the programs.
B. Computers
1. Children mostly use computers to access the internet, play games, and socialize.
2. As with TV, the content is what affects children most.
3. Extreme video-gaming is associated with less school success.
4. Online communication promotes self-disclosure, which produces friendship and well-being.
VI. Understanding Others
A. Describing others
1. As children develop, more sophisticated cognitive processes cause self-descriptions to
become richer, more abstract, and include more psychological properties.
2. Children describe other people in terms of concrete features, such as behavior, and progress
to describing them in terms of abstract traits.
B. Understanding what others think
1. As children move beyond the preschool years, they realize that others see the world
differently, both literally and figuratively, and start to take the perspective of other people.
2. According to Selman, hildren go through five stages of perspective-taking.
a. Undifferentiated – Children know that that others have different thoughts and feelings,
but confuse them with their own thoughts and feelings.
b. Social-information – Children know that perspectives differ because people have
access to different information.
c. Self-reflective – Children can step into another person’s shoes.
d. Third-person – Children can understand a third person perspective.
e. Societal – Children realize that the third person perspective is influenced by contexts.
3. Recursive thinking allows children to understand what another person thinks based on the
information that person has (i.e. “he thinks that she thinks”).
C. Prejudice
1. Once preschool children identify with a group, they begin to show prejudice, a negative
view of others based on their membership in a specific group.
2. In young children, negative views typically don’t involve overt hostility; it’s simply that
other groups “come up short” when compared to one’s own group.
3. Prejudice declines during the elementary school years and increases again during early
adolescence.
4. The resurgence in adolescence reflects two difference processes:
a. Experiential – when exposed to prejudices of those around them, children and
adolescents internalize some of these views.
b. Adolescent identity – in their search for identity, adolescents’ preference for their own
group often intensifies.
5. Greater prejudice in older children and adolescents reflects both a more positive view of
their own group and a more negative view of others.
6. Parents, teachers, and other adults can help rid children of prejudice:
a. Encourage friendly and constructive contacts between children from different groups.
b. Encourage intergroup contact. Prejudice is reduced when the participating groups of
children are equal in status, when the contact between groups involves pursuing
common goals, and when parents and teachers support the goal of reducing prejudice.
c. Ask children to play different roles.
d. When children learn about the racism that minority groups experience, they tend to
have more positive attitudes toward those groups who have experienced racism.