UNIT-2

SYLLABUS

 INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIP ASSESSMENT

 MANAGEMENT & TRANSACTIONAL ANALYSIS
 SOCIAL INTELLIGENCE
 JOHARI WINDOW
 CONFLICT MANAGEMENT

Interpersonal relationships…
For the short answer: all kinds of relationships in this world can be
interpersonal relationships.

You have an interpersonal relationship with a stranger-turned-acquaintance…

with whom you communicate on your way to work… or with your partner.

Unfortunately, many people don’t understand the value of interpersonal

relationships and in turn, neglect them or brush them off.

Thankfully, you showed interest… and you’ll light up some lives around you
once you read this think-piece.

Your loved ones will brighten others’ lives… and I hope this chain never
stops.

So, without any delay, let’s hop in…

Interpersonal Relationships – Benefits, and Challenges

Interpersonal relationship definition

Summary
Interpersonal relationships define and include any relationship in your life
with another person – even if it’s short-lived or a long-term one – where you
bonded with them to some extent.
How to maintain interpersonal relationships
You need interpersonal relationships for the obvious reasons… the benefits
(which surely weighs over the drawbacks).

So, if you want to maintain them… like all relationships, you need to follow
some rules to make your interpersonal relationships last longer.

Let’s find out what they are.

1. Listen carefully

When you connect with someone, you talk about the common ground and
interests and play with the safer topics. Nothing’s wrong with that, however,
active listening is important too.

If you’re a good listener to the other person, they feel valued.

Many times you cut off others’ speech unintentionally. The other person feels
that the relationship is more about you… a biased one… and it deteriorates.

So, next time you bond with someone, share your side of the story but allow
equal opportunities to the other person.

2. Show the real you

You can’t share your darkest secrets with people in lieu of maintaining a
relationship, and that’s fine. However, keeping things from others isn’t the
same as expressing something that’s unlike you.

Remember that if you need to alter your personality to mingle with others,
that’s not the relationship you want for the long run.

Show the real you, the ones meant to be will stick by your side.

3. Take it easy with disagreements

Nobody out there in the world is your carbon copy… so don’t expect
anybody to support all of your opinions.

Though you bond with others only when you find common interests, that
doesn’t mean it’ll always be the case.

Whenever you have arguments or disagreements… even if it’s about your

favorite player… it’s okay, mate. Acknowledge the differences and your
individualities and move on.

Don’t hold grudges over differences, else your relationship will not sustain
the ordeal.
4. Own up to your mistakes

When you have arguments or fights, either or both sides might be at fault. If
you think it’s your fault, apologize. Don’t be someone who waits for the
other to apologize.

Rather, be a responsible person, rectify and reflect on your mistakes when

you commit one.

When you apologize, it shows that you prioritize your relationship over
minor/major issues between you two.

If the other person equally values the relationship, you’ll solve your issues
soon.

5. Engage in authentic conversations

If your interpersonal relationship is a close one, talk.

Think it’s contradicting the first rule? No, it isn’t. Listening doesn’t mean you
can’t talk. Talk and let them talk too.

For instance, share something great you did or something that hurt you
deeply. Make the conversations meaningful.

With this, the other person will understand you better, have a new topic to
continue a conversation with, and you’ll know the world from a different
angle. How cool is that?

6. Show appreciation

You appreciate your interpersonal relationships – love your parents, can’t do

without your friends, bothering your siblings makes your day… but that’s in
your mind, do they know it? Not unless you say so.

So, engage in verbal communication about your feelings. If you’re shy,

expressing verbally can be quite a task for you… so why not write a note of
appreciation?

Communicate in your own way but make sure your feelings reach them loud
and clear.

This way, eventually they will show you the same love, and your interpersonal
relationships will blossom.
 TRANSACTIONAL ANALYSIS

Transactional analysis is a theory of human personality, a theory of social

behaviour.
The transactional analysis focuses on human personality and a system
of enhancement of human relationship.
It offers a systematic approach to understand the bond between human needs
and behaviour.
It also shows a person, a group or an organisation can be efficacious in
solving the obstacles and improving their relationships.

Source: International Journal of Business and Social Science

It offers a comprehensive model of personality, communication, motivation,
leadership, conflict resolution, goal-setting among others to the business
organisations and helps the leaders in a firm to understand behavioural
patterns, communication, interpersonal relationships, time management etc.
A study conducted on the effects of the transactional analysis training
programme on team leadership factors helped in identifying a modality to
enhance the leaders’ and managers’ qualities and abilities that are needed in
team leadership. The research hypothesis was that there are huge differences
between the leaders and managers who attended this programme and the
ones who didn’t.
Major parameters to analyse the difference were:
Warmth (People who are warm and attentive to others)
Emotional Stability (Someone who is adaptive and mature)
Social Boldness (Those who are not easily offended, are daring and eager to
take risks)
Those who attended the training programme showed great improvement on
Emotional Stability and Social Boldness as compared to the ones who didn’t.
There wasn’t any considerable change in the Warmth factor. The pragmatic
implications of the results are that transactional analysis based leadership
training programmes can be leveraged to a great effect for enhancing the
Emotional Stability and Social Boldness levels in the team managers and
leaders.
Therefore, understanding the behaviour of yourself and of others is of
paramount importance. Extracting a rich insight into the intricacies of human
relations and the behaviour that you see in your professional and personal life
can help you become a more effective leader. Transactional analysis can
make you alter the way you interact with others and bring about a much-
needed quality of great leadership in you.

SOCIAL INTELLIGENCE
What is meant by social intelligence?
Social intelligence refers to a person's ability to understand and manage
interpersonal relationships. It is distinct from a person's IQ or “book smarts.”
It includes an individual's ability to understand, and act on, the feelings,
thoughts, and behaviors of other people.

What is social intelligence in the workplace?

Social intelligence refers to how aware people are of their interactions with
others. In the workplace, well-honed social intelligence helps individuals avoid
conflict, manage expectations and communicate effectively.

5 Ways to increase your social intelligence

1. Keep track of how you are feeling:

Awareness is an integral part of social intelligence*. Only those people
can be socially intelligent who are also emotionally aware. Yes! It all
starts with ‘you’. A good way to start is by being awareof your own
physiological cues of your emotional state like heartbeat, respiration,
perspiration etc. It will help you gauge your internal dynamicsand will
help you offset reactions and manage impulse.
2. Approach interpersonal interactions with receptiveness:
Whenever you have an opportunity for interpersonal interactions – a
meeting, a discussion, a one-on-one, a conversation – try to get into it
without preconceived notions. People are not events, they are processes.
And it is only our mind’s typecasting that stops us from looking at them
anew. So be open to be surprised (and shocked). It will help you become
better.
3. Make an effort to put yourself in other person’s shoes:
While dealing with someone, try to actively imagine other person’s
intervening aspects like situations, constraints, preferences, complexes,
priorities or aspirations. And do it so that you can know where he or she
is coming from and not to conclude how he or she is. Incidentally,when
you remain truly engaged in a conversation, it helps the mirror neurons in
your brain to strike [Link] empathy makes the all-important
difference**

4. Read invisible interconnectionsin a social apparatus:

Some people call it politics and some others name it diplomacy, but the
fact remains that every place, organization, institution, event or occasion
has an invisible hierarchy and power-dynamics to it. Everyone is
connected to everyone else in a unique way. It is important to understand
these subtle interconnections at play. This helps in managing your
responses wisely.
5. Learn to interpret people’s nonverbal behavior:
The real connections can only be made with people if you understand
how they are feeling emotionally. Yes! The thoughts are a person’s
intellectual pursuits but emotions are deep representation of a person’s
real self. Emotions call shots in most situations. And the fact is that
nonverbal behavior – gestures, postures and expressions – is the most
trustworthy representation of one’s emotions. Thus, to develop social
intelligence, it is crucial to learn the scientific skill of interpreting
nonverbal behavior.
 Johari Window
Johari Window is a technique for improving self-awareness within an
individual. It helps in understanding your relationship with yourself and
others. Johari Window model can be a useful tool if you want to improve
your communication skills.

It was developed by American psychologists Joseph Luft and Harry

Ingham in 1955, hence the name Johari. Johari Window is generally used in
Self-help groups in exercises which help a person to learn and discover
things about themselves, like heuristic exercise.

Johari Window is a method used for self-discovery. Let us understand

Definition and meaning of Johari Window Model with examples.

What is Johari Window?

Generally, it is believed that we have in a group based on our perception of
others. And that is why to improve communication in a group it is
important to develop the perception of an individual in the group.

Johari window model is based upon two things – to acquire the trust of
others by revealing your information to them and by learning about yourself
through feedback by others.

Johari Window Model Description

There are four questions in the model just like panes in a window and each
person fits into one of this pane. Each window in Johari window model
signifies feelings, personal information, and motivation.

Also, the important point to know here is that through window panes one
must determine whether one is known or unknown to oneself as well as the
others.
 Johari Window

Here as you can see in the photo there are four different panes and each
signifies one crucial idea behind it. Further, the panes are in the horizontal
axis as well as the vertical axis. So, you have to determine in which
window you fall and based on that your personality can be known.

In this model, the main focus is on feedback. Accepting of feedback and

conveying of this feedback is done through this model. The panes given in
the vertical direction represents part that is known and unknown to others.
While the horizontal part represents the known and unknown part to your
self.

That is two windows represent your true self while the other two windows
represent the part that is known to others but unknown to self.

This information which is known to self and unknown to others can be

transferred through socializing with others. While the part that is known to
others but unknown to self is conveyed through feedback that you get
through other members in the group.

This model works on the basis of communication happening in the group

and how to improve yourself. The model is very simple to understand and
as a result, it is used in various organizations.

Now, we have divided the panes into 4 different panes to make you
understand further about how compromises in these panes.

Johari Window Quadrant 1: Open Area or Arena

This area or pane is called open area because the information in this pane
about the behavior, feelings, emotions about the person is known to that
person itself as well as the other members in this group.

In this arena, all the communication occurs through a two-way process.

Such that the person socializes about himself with others and constantly
receives feedback from the other members of the group. As a result, the
group becomes more effective and the relationship in this group is very
dynamic.

In this group, the process of feedback solicitation is very common. This

process occurs in the group that has an understanding and the feedbacks of
the other person are heard.

So, the open area through this group can be increased horizontally such that
the blindspot area is reduced and vertically it is increased so that the hidden
and unknown areas of a person are reduced when that person reveals about
his feeling to the other person.

Johari Window Quadrant 2: Blindspot or BlindSelf

Blindspot is the area in which the certain information on your personality is

known to others but that information is not known to you.

In simple terms, other people may interpret your personality different than
you might have expected. For efficient communication, this area must be
reduced.

One way to do it is through feedback that you get from other members in
the group.

Johari Window Quadrant 3: Hidden Area or Hidden Self

Hidden area is the information that you hide from others. Here, the
information is known to you but the others are unknown to this information.

The reason for this may be the information might be personal to you so that
you are reluctant to share it with others. This includes secrets, past
experiences, feelings, etc. Many people keep their information private and
do not share it with others.

Johari Window Quadrant 4: Unknown Areas or Unknown Self

In this area, the information is unknown to you as well as the others.
Generally, certain feelings, talents, information, etc fall in this area.

The reason for this might be some traumatic experience in the past about a
particular event or experiences which might be unknown for your ever.

The person, as well as the group, is unaware about this till he or she
discovers it. One way to reduce this area is through open communication.
 Conflict Management
Conflict management is the practice of being able to identify and handle
conflicts sensibly, fairly, and efficiently. It is the process of dealing with
(perceived) incompatibilities or disagreements arising from, for example,
diverging opinions, objectives, and needs.

What are the common conflict management styles?

‍
1. Collaborating:
This conflict management style produces the best long-term results, but it
is frequently the most difficult and time-consuming to [Link] needs
and desires of each party are considered, and a win-win solution is found
so that everyone is satisfied.

This frequently entails all parties sitting down together, discussing the
conflict, and negotiating a solution together. The collaborating conflict
management style is used when it is critical to maintain all parties'
relationships or when the solution itself will have a significant impact.

2. Competing:
The competing conflict management style rejects compromise and does
not give in to the opinions or desires of others. One party is adamant
about how they believe a situation should be handled and will not back
down until they get their way.

This can be in situations where morals require a specific course of action,

when there isn't time to try a different solution, or when an unpopular
decision must be made. It can quickly resolve disputes, but it has a high
risk of lowering morale and productivity.

3. Avoiding:
This conflict management style seeks to reduce conflict by ignoring it,
removing the conflicting parties, or evading it in some way. Team
members who are in disagreement can be removed from the project,
deadlines pushed, or people reassigned to other departments.
If a cool-down period would be beneficial or if you need more time to
consider your stance on the conflict itself, this can be an effective conflict
resolution style. However, avoidance should not be used in place of
proper conflict resolution; putting off conflict indefinitely can and will
lead to more (and larger) conflicts down the road.

4. Accommodating:
The accommodating conflict management style is all about putting the
needs of the other party ahead of one's own. You let them 'win' and have
their way. Accommodation is used when you don't care as much about
the issue as the other person, if prolonging the conflict isn't worth your
time, or if you believe you're wrong.

This option is about keeping the peace, not putting in more effort than is
necessary, and knowing when to pick your battles. While it may appear to
be a weak option, accommodation can be the best way to resolve a minor
conflict and move on to more important issues. This style is highly
cooperative on the resolver's part, but it can lead to resentment.

5. Compromising:
This conflict management style seeks a middle ground by asking both
parties to give up some aspects of their desires in order to reach an
agreement. This style is sometimes referred to as "lose-lose," because
both parties will have to give up a few things in order to reach an
agreement on the larger issue.

When there is a time constraint or when a solution simply needs to

happen rather than be perfect, this is used. Compromise can breed
resentment, especially when used excessively as a conflict resolution
tactic, so use it sparingly.

Best practices to manage conflict

1. Be aware of conflict
Keep your eyes and ears open forchanges in workplace climate and any
early signs of developing conflict. Don’t turn a blind eye to symptoms of
hidden conflict. Conflict can only be safely ignored if it is momentary
and unlikely to escalate. Ignoring conflict may be an easy option initially,
but in most cases, it does not help and will create a more difficult
situation to resolve later.

2. Take a considerate and rational approach to conflict

Stay calm and ensure that you are able to take a considered, rational and
impartial approach to the situation. If you are personally involved, you
may need to ask someone else to handle the issue. Avoid the temptation
to adopt the instinctive reactions of ‘fight or flight’.

Avoid passive behaviour - do not take an apologetic stance and accept all
points of view whether they are right or wrong. Similarly, avoid
aggressive behaviour – do not take an authoritarian approach and fail to
listen to reasoned argument. Instead, aim to take an assertive stance,
while treating all parties with respect and listening to all points of view.

Take care with your use of language and your body language while
dealing with people involved in conflict situations. Most importantly, be
neutral and focus on the facts.

3. Investigate the situation

Take time to find out what has happened, who is involved, how people
are feeling, and what the issues are. Don’t prejudge the issue or jump to
conclusions. Speak individually and confidentially to those involved and
listen actively to make sure you understand their point of view.

Try to identify any underlying causes of conflict which may not be

immediately obvious. For example, a member of staff may be in apparent
conflict with colleagues, while the root cause is their perception that a
supervisor is treating them unfairly. Be aware that those involved may
have differing perceptions of the same situation.

4. Decide how to tackle the conflict

Having examined the situation, decide what kind of action is appropriate.

Ask yourself:

 Is this a serious matter or relatively trivial? Could it become

serious?
 Should organisational discipline or grievance procedures be
invoked?
 Is the matter within your sphere of authority or should it be
referred to a superior?
 Are any legal issues involved? In situations where the law comes
into play it is advisable to consult with your HR department before
you take any action.
 Would the participation of a trade union representative be
appropriate?
 Would it be best to make a ruling on the issue yourself, or would
an informal gathering to discuss the problem be helpful? Will the
parties accept your ruling?
 Is time needed for heated emotions to subside before moving
forward?

The answers to these questions will help you decide what action to take.
For all sorts of reasons, there may be situations where formal processes,
including legal proceedings, may need to be invoked – if in doubt, consult
your HR department. However, many issues can be resolved without
resorting to costly legal cases. In most cases a mutually agreed mediated
solution will be more effective than an imposed solution which may leave
all parties dissatisfied.

5. Let everyone have their say

If you are able to get the parties together, you may be able to reach a
satisfactory solution. Take a positive, friendly and assertive approach to
the meeting and set ground rules for the session. Assertive behaviour will
encourage the parties to express their thoughts honestly and openly,
understand the causes of conflict and find solutions.

Make sure that everyone has the chance to explain their point of view and
concerns. People will be more willing to relinquish entrenched positions
and consider compromise if they feel that their point of view has been
understood and their concerns taken on board.

6. Identify options and agree on a way forward

This is the most important and often the most difficult part of the process.
The following steps may be helpful in reaching agreement:

 Create an atmosphere where all parties are able to speak openly

and honestly.
 Acknowledge emotional issues as these are often at the heart of it
and thus will need to be resolved.
 Consider carefully the extent to which you need to control the
meeting and intervene in the discussion.
 Explore the reasons for the disagreement.
 Identify any misconceptions or misunderstandings which are
blocking progress.
 Encourage the parties to examine their own positions and identify
any common ground with others.
 Look for points which may be negotiable and seek win-win
solutions which take the interests of all parties into account.
 Ask the parties to put forward preferred solutions.
 Allow time for reflection.
 Assess each option and help the parties to agree on which
represents the best way forward.
 Secure the commitment of all parties to any agreement and agree
on a review point.
If no progress is made, a period of reflection may help, but ultimately it
may be necessary to bring in another manager or to consider external
assistance from a specialist in mediation, ADR (Alternative Dispute
Resolution) or arbitration. In these difficult cases, where complete
consensus is impossible, you should aim for a way forward that is
acceptable to all, even if it is not the preferred option for all parties
involved.

7. Implement what has been agreed

It is important to ensure that everyone is clear about what has been
decided and takes personal responsibility for any actions which have been
agreed. In some cases, a written agreement may be appropriate. Be
careful here if there is any embarrassment of any of the parties involved,
for example, if it involves public apologies.

8. Evaluate how things are going

Don’t assume that the issue has been finally resolved. Continue to keep
an eye on the situation and evaluate how well the solution is working. If
the problem reappears it may be necessary to take further action.

9. Consider preventative strategies for the future

Think about the lessons that can be learned from the conflict and the way
it was handled. What could be done better next time? How could you
develop your conflict managementskills? You may wish to consider
training or other forms of professional development on influencing,
mediation or dispute resolution techniques for yourself or a colleague.

Looking at the broader context, consider what action can be taken to

improve working relationships and encourage a culture of open
communication and consultation. Fostering a sense of group identity and
encouraging employees to see themselves as working towards a common
cause is a good way of lessening conflict in the future.

Consider whether an organisational procedure for dispute resolution or

mediation is needed. Think about whether there is something about the
way the unit works that encourage this conflicting behaviour and if this
can be ‘fixed’.