Relationship

Snapshot
Exercise 1 featured in the Relationship JournalsTM

The Relationship JournalsTM are a set of guided journals

that are designed to help couples grow their love for each
other and become better partners in 13 weeks.
BestSelf Co.
Learn more about the Relationship JournalsTM
at [Link]/love

BestSelf Co.
 Relationship Snapshot

SESSION EXERCISE

Understanding the current peaks and valleys of your relationship will help you know what
areas of your relationship are thriving and what areas you need to work on. It’s essentially a
way to get a pulse check on the state of “your union”. This is key to any relationship, which is
why the first exercise in the new Relationship Journal is focused around where you are today
as a couple.

Before you begin, print 2 copies of the exercise so you can document your own thoughts and
then come together to review and discuss.

Free yourself from distractions, put your phones away and focus only on each other.

Put some music on, pour a glass of wine or your favorite drink and get comfortable with each
other.

When you’re ready, get started:

Using the definitions outlined on the next page, individually rate each category on page 3
from 1-10 (1 = least satisfying to 10 = most satisfying) according to your satisfaction. Once
complete, connect the dots to form a mountain range, then share with your partner.

In a different color pen, chart your partner’s answers to each area on top of yours and
then connect your partner’s dots to form a mountain range.

In the section below the chart, individually note the peaks (high points) and valleys (low
points) for yourself.

Share the peaks and valleys so you both can understand where each other sits in their
satisfaction level across each area.

Individually complete the questions on pages 4 and 5 and then share and discuss the
answers with your partner.

B EG I N W I T H G R AT I T U D E

Before you begin your session, take a few minutes to share what were some positive things
you remember about your partner over the last week.

2
 Relationship Categories

TRUST
• How much can you rely on the character, ability, strength, and truth of your partner?

COMMITMENT
• How much do you feel your partner shows through words and actions that they are
committed to your relationship?
• Do you sense that they’re in it for the long haul, no matter what?
• Do they have your back (not only supporting the relationship, but also supporting you)?

ADMIRATION
• Do you have a sense of overriding appreciation and respect for and from your partner
throughout each day? Or is it most often filled with little instances of frustration,
irritation, and disappointment?

KNOWLEDGE OF LOVE MAPS
• How attuned to your partner’s ups and downs are you?
• Can you predict when they’re going to have a hard day because you know intimately
what’s going on for them in their life?
• How well does your partner know your past (especially the emotionally impactful
experiences that influence your decisions and reactions [today]?

A CONSTRUCTIVE CONFLICT
• How often do you have disagreements? if you don’t, rate this category ‘low’. Even if your
relationship seems peaceful, there’s no such thing as a conflict-free relationship.
• If you do have disagreements, are you able to work through them with trust, respect
and empathy?
• Can you hear each other out and take into consideration each other’s feelings and
perspectives?

SEX LIFE
• Are you having sex often enough for you?
• Is your connection during intimate moments fulfilling?
• Does sex tend to fill you up or leave you feeling empty?

SOCIAL LIFE
• Are you well-surrounded with friends and family you can lean on?

FINANCES
• Do you feel well-aligned in how you and your partner spend and save money?
• Are you able to have open conversations around your financial goals, priorities, and
large expenditures?

SHARED TASKS
• Do you feel your domestic duties are divided equitably, given your other responsibilities?

FAMILY/PARENTING ALIGNMENT
• Do you and your partner support each other’s parenting styles?
• Do you feel upheld and respected in front of your children, family and friends?
• Do you share similar goals and vision for your family?

3
Relationship Snapshot Grid

my partner

VALLEYS:
PEAKS:
VALLEYS:
PEAKS:

myself

4
 Relationship Snapshot

Upon reviewing, what areas are you and your partner aligned?

What areas do you both agree need work?

Describe the challenges you may encounter when trying to work on these areas?

What recent events may have contributed to the issues you’ve had in these areas?

5
 Relationship Snapshot

What do you love and appreciate about your relationship together?

How is your life better because you and your partner are together?

What have you done together or individually to improve your relationship?

Whose idea was it to get the Relationship Journals and why?

What are you going to do to be intentional with improving your relationship?

6
 Exercise Check-In

Share & Discuss

What takeaways do you have after sharing with and listening to your partner?

7
 Looking Ahead

After listening to your partner, what is one thing you can take from this relationship
exercise to connect deeper with your partner?

What would need to happen to make the next week great?

What is the best way your partner can help you when fear has entered your mindset?

How can you and your partner ensure that next week is conflict-free?

LOV E M E T E R :

Why did you choose your lovemeter rating?

8
 Wrap-Up

So, how’d it go? Do you feel more connected or at least understand each other a little better?

If you found this exercise to be beneficial, and want to keep learning about each other and
grow closer together, make sure to check out the Relationship Journals.

They contain 12 additional exercises to help you explore each other and bring you closer
together both emotionally and physically. Plus a lot of supplemental content and bonus access
to the ‘From Couples to Partners’ Companion Video Course, featuring relationship and sex
therapist, Rachel Wright, MA, LMFT.

Backed by relationship psychology, over 13 weeks you’ll discover how to:

Show up for your partner fully, so you both feel seen, heard, understood, and loved.

Develop proven habits, rituals, and skills for strengthening your relationship.

Build “Love Maps” that elevate your understanding of each other.

Cultivate techniques for increased intimacy, security, respect, and appreciation.

Enhance your communication with prompts for talking about everything.

To learn more about the Relationship Journals visit [Link]/love.

Here’s to having more fulfilling and loving relationships!

The BestSelf Co. Team