OH TEIK THEAM

ENGLISH
COUPLETS

FREE
EBOOK

OH TEIK THEAM
 ENGLISH
COUPLETS

Copyright © 2023 Oh Teik Theam

Published by Oh Teik Theam

This ebook is published solely for free

distribution/circulation. It should not be
used in any way for commercial gain.
Preface

A couplet is a pair of lines with rhyming end words. Usually both lines have the same
number of syllables.

A couplet may be closed or open.

In a closed couplet, there is a grammatical pause at the end of the first line:
He said, “Give me your vote.”
I said, “You get my goat.”

In an open couplet, the meaning of the first line continues to the second:
My wallet gets a dent
When ten dollars is spent.

Here are three excellent couplets:

Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind;
And therefore is winged Cupid painted blind.
- William Shakespeare

I have the measles and the mumps,

A gash, a rash and purple bumps.
- Shel Silversein

Nature puts on little shows

Every time it rains or snows.
- Charles Ghigna

Reading couplets provides a delightful form of light entertainment. Happy reading!

A

Ache
She salved her mental aches
With strawberries and cakes.

Achievement
The stuntman escaped from the trap:
Another feather in his cap.

Active Voice
The English teacher said, “Always make the right choice.
In nine out of ten cases, use the active voice.”

“You are loved by me,” he said to her.

She said, “The active voice I prefer!”

Ad
This is a catchy ad
For the latest food fad.

Adverb
It’s common for an adverb to modify a verb:
The old pedestrian waited patiently on the kerb.

An adverb can modify an adjective:

My new boss is incredibly vindictive.

It’s interesting when an adverb modifies another adverb:

When the clerk finished the job very quickly, her boss said, “Superb!”

Sometimes an adverb modifies the whole sentence:

Unfortunately, he showed no real repentance.

To complete the lesson, an adverb can also modify a gerund:

Walking briskly is my kind of exercise—when I’m out on an errand.

Adversity
In the face of adversity,
Have determination gritty.

Advice
He’s too free with his advice,
Which is ignored in a trice.
He’s too free with his advice,
Which is always not concise.

Advice improves your mood

When it is mental food.

Advice given late

Carries not much weight.

Age
Her grandfather is still alive,
Healthy at age ninety plus five.

At age ninety, he’s still alive and kicking.

This weekend, he intends to go picnicking.

Old age and I

See eye to eye.

Alibi
Not credible was her alibi:
She was at home getting some shut-eye.

Alligator
See you later, alligator.
You are my new navigator.

Alone
A person who chooses to be alone
Is like a skeleton without a bone.

Alter Ego
Hello, amigo,
My alter ego!

Anger
Anger is a nasty emotion.
Control it with a mental potion.

Don’t ever go to bed

With anger in your head.

Ant
An ant carried a breadcrumb
One-tenth the size of my thumb.

Argument
Louder will a person speak
When their argument is weak.

Arrow
A sharp bamboo arrow from my quiver
Made the bulls-eye on the target shiver.

Art
I can your portrait paint.
Sit still and do not faint!

From the artist’s heart

Comes beautiful art.

Attire
Women desire
Stylish attire.

Bachelor
“I’m not married,” said he.
“Footloose and fiancée-free.”

Baby
She gave birth to a bouncing baby.
It was born out of wedlock, maybe.

Bait
The fish ignored the bait.
It wanted to lose weight.

Bald
My comb gave me a scare
When it was full of hair.

Ball
This new ball has a good bounce;
It weighs one pound and one ounce.
Barber
“My boy, I’ve been a barber for years sixteen.
You really don’t know the stubble I have seen.”

Tales I heard from my wizened barber

Included one called Ali Baba.

Bask
Bask in the sunshine
From eight until nine.

Beanstalk
The beanstalk said to Jack,
“That is a heavy sack.”

The beanstalk said to Jack,

“I deserve a kickback.”

The beanstalk said to Jack,

“When are you coming back?”

Beard
His gingery beard
Is soft but not weird.

Beat
Get out of my office, you scum,
Before I beat you like a drum.

Beauty
Beauty and the beast:
A rare visual feast.

Beauty lies
In our eyes.

Bed
Come to bed;
Rest your head.

Bee
Stung by a fierce bee;
Screamed like a banshee.

Beggar
The beggar held a metal bowl,
Which had in its centre a hole.

The beggar got a dollar

From a distinguished scholar.

Behave
Be scared or be brave.
Choose how to behave.

Bell
“This is the last straw,” said a big rat.
“One of us will have to bell the cat.”

“I drew the short straw,” said a timid rat.

“It falls to me to bell the tabby cat.”

Belly
A watched telly
Warms the belly.

Best
You can’t do your best
When you lose your zest.

Bet
I’m willing to take a bet
I won’t learn to gamble yet.

Bill
When he saw the huge bill,
He suddenly felt ill.

When she saw the big bill,

She had to take a pill.

Bird
A bird in a cage
Dies at a young age.

The bird on the windowsill

Whistled a song by Faith Hill.

Raven said, “Swallow, your feathers dazzle in the spring.

My feathers protect me from the winter’s piercing sting.”
Watching the cloudless, sunny sky,
A thirsty crow felt high and dry.

A flock of birds in flight

Make a beautiful sight.

Birds of a feather
Chirrup together.

Magpie, peewit, mynah and jay

Drink coffee in a nest café.

Free the bird from the cage

And end its pent-up rage.

Blame
She plays the blame game
With no trace of shame.

She said, “I am to blame,”

With a feeling of shame.

Jack broke the windowpane

And put the blame on Jane.

Blind Date
A dream blind date
Arranged by fate.

Bluff
“I am a cliff,” said the bluff.
“Facing me is the sea rough.”

Blush
I saw her blush.
Her eyes said hush.

Boat
There’s a boat
On the moat.

Something that hit his small boat

Made it unable to float.
Bond
The bond they share
Is something rare.

Bone
The something at the dog thrown
Turned out to be just a bone!

Doc, please remove the bone stuck in my throat.

I’ll give you anything that floats your boat.

Book
Lend me a paperback book
To read by the babbling brook.

A book is comfortably read

When you are resting in your bed.

Booze
Win or lose,
Eschew booze.

Borrow
You can’t borrow
My tomorrow.

Brat
That mean brat
Drowned a rat.

Bread
I’ve baked my first loaf of bread.
Why don’t we paint the town red?

I earn my daily bread.

My family is fed.

With just needle and thread,

She earns her daily bread.

This loaf of bread is stale.

Do not put it for sale.

Breadwinner
With the death of the breadwinner,
There’s no breakfast, lunch and dinner.

Break
Give him a break
For pity’s sake.

Breakfast
Breakfast of gruel,
Bodily fuel.

Bride
She was a lovely bride.
Her parents beamed with pride.

Broom
Good morning, I am the new broom.
You really are a dirty room!

Bruise
A relationship bruise
Cannot be soothed by booze.

Bug
Leave me alone, travel bug.
Hide yourself under the rug!

Bitten by the travel bug,

I searched in vain for a drug.

Busy
“I’m as busy as a bee.
Call me tomorrow,” said he.

Butterfly
A kaleidoscope of butterflies:
In my stomach they behave like flies.

Cage
A hen kept in a cage
Looks older than its age.
Cake
A cake with icing
Is to my liking.

She wanted to bake

Her own wedding cake.

Candy
Happy birthday, Andy.
Here’s a box of candy.

Car
His ancient car gave up the ghost,
A memorable chapter closed.

Cart
He let his beautiful sweetheart
Ride in his wooden bullock cart.

Cash
I realized I was out of cash;
To the ATM I made a dash.

Castle
The castle in the sand
Looked impressive and grand.

The castles in the sands

Were built by unseen hands.

Castles in the air:

No one can get there.

Beautiful castles in the sand:

Heavy rains they will not withstand.

Cat
In a bachelor flat
Lived an old tabby cat.

Cellphone
He answered a call on his cellphone
And almost knocked down a traffic cone.

Chair
I bought a new chair this morning;
It’s my favourite butt parking!

Chapatti
Yesterday I had a patty.
Today I’ll try some chapatti.

Character
A heinous malefactor
Has an evil character.

Chat
Come and chew the fat with me.
We can talk from pee to see.

Cheating
Cheating isn’t something nice.
Don’t make the shame mistake twice.

Cheek
Turn the other cheek
Seven days a week.

Cheery
He was weary
But still cheery.

Chess
“I’ll beat you hollow,” he said.
“Your two bishops will be dead.”

He captured my bishops and my queen,

But his rooks are nowhere to be seen.

Cheque
Oops, the cheque is unsigned.
Sorry, it slipped my mind.

Chick
At a computer fair I met a chick.
I was disappointed we didn’t click.

Chore
Scrubbing the floor
Is a small chore.
Clean
All the tables had been scrubbed clean.
Not a speck of dust could be seen.

A hungry mouse
Shuns a clean house.

Clever
If you’re beyond clever,
You will live forever.

Clock
For sixty minutes the clock ticked.
It’s clear a new hour it has picked.

“You have ten minutes to round up the flock,”

Said the farmer. “You have to beat the clock!”

Clone
I don’t live alone:
I live with my clone!

Look how he has grown,

And so has his clone!

He’s a clone
Of my clone.

My best friend has a clone

With DNA unknown.

Leave me alone.
Talk to my clone.

Leave me alone.
WhatsApp my clone.

Clothes
Her clothes were so tight
I couldn’t breathe right!

Cloud
Cumulus in the sky,
Could you please start to cry?
Clown
A circus clown
Buries his frown.

Cobra
“I’ll give your fair skin a kiss,”
Said the cobra with a hiss.

Coffee
Coffee you drink,
Better you think.

Make my coffee strong;

This movie is long.

Sip your coffee not

When it’s piping hot.

Coffin
You’re wrong; the answer is not a napkin.
Nothing is smaller than a child’s coffin.

Colour
A look in a kaleidoscope will show
Bright and lovely colours of the rainbow.

Comma
A comma is a short pause.
Its correct use wins applause.

Place a comma before coordinating conjunctions to separate independent clauses:

The philanthropist lived to an old age, and the money he left behind went to various
worthy causes.

But short clauses are “comma-bereft” –

For example: I stayed but she left.

Omit the comma if the independent clauses are conceptually interdependent:

The young woman said to him, “Come inside and I’ll introduce you to the
superintendent.”
(The subject of the independent clause is understood: Come inside = (You) come inside.)

A non-restrictive clause is set off from the rest of the sentence by commas:
Her father, who likes music, often sings while he is dressed in his pyjamas.
(The clause provides information about the noun it modifies (“father”) but is not
essential to understanding the meaning of the noun—it does not restrict the meaning. If
we leave out the clause, the sentence still makes sense.)

“A restrictive clause is not set off by commas from the rest of the sentence,” said Miss
Jones.
And then she quickly wrote on the blackboard: People who live in glass houses should
not throw stones.
(The clause is essential to the meaning of the noun it modifies (“people”)—it restricts the
meaning. Which people are we talking about? People who live in glass houses. If we
leave out the clause, the sentence does not make sense.)

The principle of comma use applies to appositives as well:

(a) His friend James said to him the other day, “I met a wonderful belle.”
(b) In the middle of the night, her only child, Helen, let out a yell.
(Restrictive: Which friend? His friend James.
Non-restrictive: “Helen” merely describes “her only child”.)

She wrote: “The blind, young man sang a beautiful song.”

Her teacher said, “The comma makes the sentence wrong.”

Composer
The composer was over the moon
About the huge success of his tune.

Conjunction
FANBOYS stands for for, and, nor, but, or, yet, and so—
The coordinating conjunctions we all know.

Conscience
A conscience strong
Says no to wrong.

Contraction
The girl was baffled by the first question in the quiz:
She didn’t know that “It’s” stands for “It has” or “It is”.

Convict
I’d like to speak to the police sergeant in charge.
It’s about the escaped convict who’s still at large.

Core
The system is rotten to the core.
We can’t put up with it any more.
Count
I’ll count the cars.
You count the stars.

Crab
“Let me give you a helping hand,”
I said to the crab in the sand.

Creature
The sea creature cleared its throat.
From side to side swayed the boat.

Crook
In all kinds of weather,
The crooks flock together.

Crossword
A tough crossword clue,
A soft pencil chew.

Crowd
For crying out loud,
Don’t follow the crowd!

Cupid
Its GPS tells it where to go,
The golden arrow from Cupid’s bow.

Curiosity
Curiosity killed the cat.
Please don’t ask about this and that.

Look at all the curious faces

Visiting so many places.

Curry
Eaten with scented rice,
Chicken curry tastes nice.

Curse
He escaped from poverty’s curse:
He inherited a big purse.

Witch’s curse,
Empty purse.
Utter a holy verse,
Annihilate a curse.

Customer
I don’t think the customer was right
When he said, “Miss, this tie is too tight.”

Cut
My hand had a paper cut.
My eyes must have been half-shut.

Dance
They went to the annual fair
And danced as a lovely pair.

With joy in her brain,

She danced in the rain.

People danced cheek to cheek,

Superfluous to speak.

They danced perfectly as a pair;

Their noses were not in the air.

Danger
He is an experienced ranger,
Not afraid to flirt with danger.

Dawn
It’s the crack of dawn;
A new day is born.

Day
The day becomes long
If something is wrong.

Dead
Underfed,
Almost dead.
Gun to the head.
Will he be dead?

Death
He carelessly bumped into Death
And said, “I need to catch my breath.”

Have zero fear

When death is near.

Debate
After several days of vigorous debate,
The motion was carried by fifty votes to eight.

Defeat
Chaotic retreat
Signals defeat.

Tortoise was happy that Hare overslept.

Hare cried, “This defeat is hard to accept!”

Dejection
Pitiless rejection,
Pitiful dejection.

Delay
Broken relay,
Lengthy delay.

Departure
The angry man left hurriedly at noon,
Quicker than a toupee in a typhoon.

Desert
The desert wind at night
Frightens even a kite.

Deserve
I do not deserve you.
Choose another in lieu.

Destiny
Destiny and fate
Are each other’s mate.
Destiny and fate
Met on a blind date.

Detective
The detective came to on the parquet floor.
Someone had hit his head with a two-by-four.

Dice
There’s no need to think twice.
Just throw away the dice.

Dimwit
A six-foot tall dimwit
Was a mental midget.

Dirt
A clean white shirt
Attracts much dirt.

Discovery
Discovery is a process
That is much needed for progress.

Discussion
A discussion can get heated
When someone becomes conceited.

Dizzy
I am not feeling well:
I have a dizzy spell.

Do
The evil you do
Boomerangs on you.

Yes, I think she understood.

I did it for her own good.

Doctor
The feel good factor
Is your best doctor.

Says my family doctor,

“The best medicine is laughter.”
Dog
His smart dog licked his face
To ask for an embrace.

A dog with a hollow bone

Will ignore a megaphone.

A dangerous dog in a manger lay.

The hungry oxen couldn’t eat the hay.

The dog for sale

Has a long tail.

Doubt
Confidence is about
Expelling every doubt.

Dream
We need a winning team
To realize our dream.

The young woman was in despair,

For her dream vanished then and there.

It wasn’t a pleasant dream,

With a stalker and a scream.

Dress
The window display caught her eye:
That silk dress she wanted to buy.

Drink
“This is the perfect fruit drink,” said Grace.
“Definitely no more wild juice chase!”

Drink makes you teeter

From the first metre.

He’s a slave to drink;

He’s not in the pink.

Driving
The passenger was a bundle of nerves
When the cabby negotiated the curves.
Drone
I wish to be left alone.
I have to repair my drone.

Drought
“The drought will be brief,”
Said the village chief.

Duck
“We’re still alive,” said the ducks,
“So don’t tell us our luck sucks.”

Duel
Two daggers drawn,
Duel at dawn.

Dupe
He is in the soup:
A Macau scam dupe.

Durian
Durian is my favourite fruit season;
It’s rich, creamy texture is the reason.

He sold durians off his barrow

In a street crowded and narrow.

Earth
Geography tells us that Earth
Has an equatorial girth.

Eat
Watch what you eat,
Salty or sweet.

What would you like to eat?

We don’t serve any meat.

Egg
The old health guru spoke:
“Eat your eggs with the yolk.”
Eggplant
“Eat me? You can’t!”
Cried the eggplant.

Ego
It all happened in a flash:
My ego suffered a gash.

When your ego gets a bruise,

You should never blow a fuse.

Enamoured
“Enamoured of” is standard usage, not “enamoured with” or “enamoured by”:
Everyone in the village knows that she is enamoured of that handsome guy.

Enemy
The enemy within
Must never ever win.

Envy
Envy is a bright flame
That will its owner maim.

Example
The teacher gave her class a sample
Of the meaning of good example.

Exit
I’ll see you in a bit.
Right now it’s an exit.

Eye
He gave her the eye
And became her guy.

He gave her the eye;

She was rather shy.

Fable
This dog and ox fable
Happened in a stable.

Farmer
He works on the land,
Helped by a farmhand.

Fashion
Tons of money she spends,
A slave to fashion’s trends.

Fear
The right dose of fear
Protects our life dear.

Feelings
Be a proud spender
Of feelings tender.

Feud
Two families rude
Caused a bitter feud.

Fight
“I can knock you out—I have a fist of stone.”
“I don’t think you can even lick a snow cone!”

Film
This new film is trash.
What a waste of cash!

Fire
It’s starting to tire:
More wood on the fire!

We were cold from the storm,

But a fire kept us warm.

“Out of the frying pan into the fire”

Is a bad situation that stokes your ire.

Firefighter
Firefighters wear special attire
When they strive to put out a fire.

Fish
The fish in his hand was bought.
No, it wasn’t by him caught.

Fish and chips

Hurt the hips.

Buy the fish;

Cook the dish.

A pet fish in a bowl

Deeply misses its shoal.

Fishing
Be patient with line and bait;
A fish will reward your wait.

Flat
“Your apartment is dirty,” said Pat.
I was so angry I knocked her flat!

Flattery
She said my verbal flattery
Was couched in language flowery.

Flea
“I won’t leave you,” said the flea,
Disregarding the dog’s plea.

Floor
From my concise dictionary I found
The floor of a room is also called ground.

Flower
Describe a flower
By its scent power.

The flower she chose

Was a yellow rose.

The favourite flower of my nose

Is certainly the beautiful rose.

Food
Eating a “flavourite” food
Will surely improve one’s mood.
Chicken curry and fish:
My culinary wish.

Forgiveness
Forgiveness brings bliss:
It is Heaven’s kiss.

Fort
The boss told me to hold the fort.
The job was harder than I thought.

Fox
This fox steals a hen
Every now and then.

“Tonight is the night,” said a fox.

“I will raid that coop full of cocks.”

Free
Buy two, get one free:
Tasty instant mee.

Let me help you for free.

Glad to forgo my fee.

Friendship
Friendships are very fragile.
Avoid becoming hostile.

You are life’s gift in friendship.

I cherish the membership.

Fright
Ease your fright,
Hold me tight.

Frog
The frog prince swam in the pond,
Waiting for the princess blonde.

The frog prince swam in the pond.

Of the lilies it was fond.

Its days are over as a tadpole,

This croaking green frog taking a stroll.

Frown
Do not judge me by my frown.
There are days when we feel down.

A face with a frown

Deserves a thumbs down.

Fruit
It is beyond dispute:
This is a healthful fruit.

Gretel ate a fruit in the wood

And exclaimed, “This tastes berry good!”

Fun
When your work is done,
Go out and have fun.

Funny
For my money,
He is funny.

Future
The future, someone said,
Is also for the dead.

The future is bright;

Focus on the light.

Of the future, do not fear.

Stay in the present, you hear?

Genie
The genie in the ancient lamp
Turned me into a boxing champ.

The genie in the ancient lamp

Had a psychosomatic cramp.
Gerund
“You are correct,” says Mr. Brown.
“A gerund is a type of noun.”

A gerund always functions as a noun:

Walking briskly helps to keep your weight down.
(The gerund functions as the subject of the verb “helps”.)

Ghost
In the dead of the night,
A boy ghost flew a kite.

In the dead of the night,

Two young ghosts had a fight.

In the dead of the night,

A ghost said, “Hold me tight.”

The young ghost left her grave

To reside in a cave.

Gigolo
The gigolo looked frail:
An unhealthy fee-male.

Give
Don’t forget to live;
Remember to give.

Gnome
He said to the gnome,
“Welcome to my home.”

Go
The father and son are always on the go,
Their vocabulary innocent of “slow”.

Going To
“Going to” is used to reflect the future tense:
They are all going to stop sitting on the fence.

Gold
An adventurer bold
Set out to look for gold.
Good
There is no dearth
Of good on earth.

Goodbye
Goodbye is the hardest word,
But it’s not the most absurd.

Goodish
“Goodish” means “somewhat good” or “fairly large”:
(a) It was a goodish performance by Marge.
(b) The crook hid a goodish sum on the barge.

Gossip
Gossip we should never spread.
Let it be forever dead.

Gout
There’s no doubt
You have gout.

Gown
“I think I’ll buy a beautiful red gown
And enjoy a delicious meal in town.”

Graffiti
“Graffiti” (plural in form) is often used as a mass noun:
Graffiti was scribbled all over the walls in the old town.

Grammar
The teacher said, “Learn good grammar.
It’s ‘is’ and not ‘are’ for hammer.”

Grasshopper
The lazy grasshopper said to the ant,
“Sing with me—there’s no need from work to pant.”

Gratitude
Gratitude you feel
Don’t try to conceal.

The gratitude you feel in your heart

Can’t be measured in dollars or baht.

Grave
With one foot in the grave,
He forgot and forgave.

Greed
A man filled with greed
Will not wise words heed.

More than you need

Betrays your greed.

It starts as a seed,
This evil called greed.

Grief
He who listens hears
Unshed bitter tears.

He’s given his parents much grief.

Time he turned over a new leaf.

Her grief
Was brief.

Groom
A new groom sweeps clean,
No dirt to be seen.

A new groom sweeps clean,

With eyes that are keen.

Grudge
If you carry a grudge,
Please give your mind a nudge.

Guard
At the gate and in the yard,
The uniformed men stood guard.

Guest
An unwelcome guest
Will your patience test.

Guy
Guy means “a man”: We need a strong guy like Rex;
Its plural, guys, means “people of either sex”.
H

Habit
Nip a bad habit in the bud.
You simply drop it with a thud.

Hair
Comb your hair;
It’s still there.

Innocent of hair,
The head of the heir.

Young and beautiful Clare

Has castles in her hair.

Hand
An unseen and mysterious hand
Described a circle in the sand.

Happiness
Happiness is to be found
Where there is love strong and sound.

Happiness comes from within.

Boy, you can be fat or thin!

Hashish
The dog on a leash
Sniffed out the hashish.

Haste
He who acts in haste
Might become shamefaced.

Hat
She wants to pay one hundred dollars for your hat?
Hey, that’s an offer that is not to be sneezed at!

A rich woman bought an expensive hat.

It was a beautiful thing to look at.
Haughtiness
She let haughtiness pose
On the tip of her nose.

Head
Two heads are better than one:
The ideas will weigh a ton.

Heal
Time will a hurt heal;
Better you will feel.

Hear
Sweet nothings in my ear,
Which no one else can hear.

Heart
He is a man after my own heart.
We both like Beethoven and Mozart.

My mum said, “Your broken heart

Needs a spiritual spare part.”

Heartbeat
Victory and defeat
Both affect the heartbeat.

Hell
The reporter said, “All hell broke loose
When the two families broke the truce.”

Hell has much to gain

When bad guys cause pain.

Hen
My hen has only one leg,
But daily it lays an egg.

Hiker
A hiker walked on the road.
His weariness clearly showed.

Homework
The pupil pleaded with his teacher thus:
“I think my homework deserves a B plus.”
Hospitable
Be hospitable;
It’s profitable.

House
Welcome to my tree house,
Which I share with a mouse.

Housewife
My primary goal in life
Is to be a good housewife.

Hunch
I have a strong hunch
I’ll meet her at brunch.

Hungry
If you’re hungry, Jack,
Would you like a snack?

Ice
To break the ice,
Say something nice.

Idiom
“This idiom is funny,” says Joe.
“‘Tell me about it’ means ‘I know’!”

Immunity
If we all strengthen our immunity,
The virus has no opportunity.

Incompetence
When incompetence somehow wins,
The incompetent winner grins.

Infidelity
When a heart is sadly broken,
Infidelity has spoken.
Infinitive
An infinitive can function as a noun:
“I love to sing,” said the cheerful circus clown.
(The infinitive functions as the object of the verb “love”.)

An infinitive also functions as an adverb:

(a) The new students were eager to learn about the herb.
(The infinitive modifies the adjective “eager”.)
(b) He braved the rain to wait for his girlfriend on the kerb.
(The infinitive modifies the verb “braved”.)

“An infinitive as an adjective,” said the teacher from her seat.

“Whenever I take a train or a bus, I bring a sandwich to eat.”
(The infinitive modifies the noun “sandwich”.)

The teacher says to the pupil, bright and inquisitive:

“Sometimes it makes perfect sense to split an infinitive.”

Inflation
Inflation is hard on the purse,
But the situation could be worse.

Ink
A pen and a bottle of ink
Make it easy for him to think.

Insomnia
Wake up, wake up, wake up, for goodness’ sake!
Your insomnia pill you forgot to take!

Invoice
The friendly invoice
Had a payment choice.

Island
An island in the sun
Promises lots of fun.

No island in the sun

Has inhabitants none.

J
Job
Give this new job a try;
It’s as easy as pie.

The lad finished his paper round

And said, “I am now homeward-bound.”

Joke
Have you heard the funny joke
About a blonde and a bloke?

A joke can a friendship end

Or a relationship mend.

Divided into chapters fourteen,

This new book has one thousand jokes clean.

Joker
When funny jokers speak,
They do so tongue in cheek.

K
King
“The handsome king,” she wrote,
“Was crowned in a reign coat.”

Kiss
It takes more than a kiss
To multiply your bliss.

Her soft kiss

Is sheer bliss.

Kit
“It’s not here, you twit.
Where’s the thirst-aid kit?”

Knack
These two women have a knack
Of talking behind my back.
L

Landscape
This mud hut is a blot on the landscape
From which your curious eyes cannot escape.

Lazy
“Yippee! The boss has gone out!”
The lazy employees shout.

Leek
Once a week
I eat leek.

Leopard
The leopard stood rooted to the spot.
It finally said, “Please, no snapshot!”

Letter
I just received her printed letter
(Handwritten would have been better).

Lie
I’d rather die
Than tell a lie.

A white lie,
Truth is shy.

A white lie,
My ally.

Life
Life, made in the bed,
Is lived in the head.

I will protect you with my life;

I have a hammer and a knife.

She brings sunshine into my life.

I will ask her to be my wife.

Life is a drop of eternity,

Best lived not in taciturnity.

One life to live,

Much love to give.

Life is a wonderful thing

Even if you’re not a king.

Limit
The only limit is the sky.
Never give up, never say die.

Limp
At the zoo a poor chimp
Walked with a pronounced limp.

Liquor
“Reject liquor,”
Said the vicar.

Living
Living in the past
Cannot be a blast.

Load
It’s a very long road
If heavy is your load.

Loan
He took a small bank loan
To marry his sweet Joan.

Longings
Sure, I have a few secret longings,
But they don’t reflect my shortcomings.

Love
The student did not put an X against “none of the above”,
For she knew that another term for puppy love is calf love.

Love can be clearly heard

With just a whispered word.

Love is a wonderful gift.

Give it with no thought of thrift.
The love of Grace and Roy
Occasioned lifelong joy.

It’s heaven on earth

When love causes mirth.

Tender love has a splendiferous knack

Of making a forgiving heart come back.

Known to not a few,

How much I love you.

Lovemaking
His lovemaking needs to be much stronger.
There are Tik Tok videos that are longer.

Mag
She curled up in her beanbag
And read the new fashion mag.

Magician
The magician’s guillotine trick
Pleased every Tom, Harry and Dick.

Maid
The maid swept the floor with a glance
And partnered her broom in a dance.

Marriage
Marriage is a major milestone:
The right person will come alone!

A marriage will definitely crack

When tolerance leaves and won’t come back.

Meditate
Do you meditate, Ben?
Yes, every now and Zen.

Meet
We will meet
In that street.

Message
The brief message in the bottle
Was as dark as my pipe’s dottle.

Meter
A parking meter
Is a coin eater.

Milk
It is awfully sad
To watch good milk turn bad.

Mime
Spare me a little time.
Sit down and watch me mime.

Mind
An act that’s unkind
Reflects a poor mind.

If you do something unkind,

Your mind is thereby defined.

You have a selfish mind.

You have an axe to grind.

My mind is my palace,
Where I can find solace.

I gave him a piece of my mind.

How could he have been so unkind?

A hen, a duck, a goose.

In my mind, they are loose.

Mirror
A magnifying hand mirror she bought.
It makes me look more beautiful, she thought.

A magnifying hand mirror she bought.

The temptation to stare at it she fought.
Mischief
The miscreants in the night
Thought mischief was their right.

Miser
The miser’s gold was stolen by a thief.
The miser was stricken with intense grief.

Mistake
I have seen many a mistake,
But this one surely takes the cake.

Modesty
Modesty is soft on the ear:
It’s a quality we all cheer.

Modifier
“My dear, your modifier is out of place;
I can picture the look on your teacher’s face!”

Money
Money is a treasure,
But it’s not wealth’s measure.

My wallet gets a dent

When ten dollars is spent.

She’s very free with her money:

“Buy yourself a snow cone, sonny.”

Money and fame

Highlight one’s name.

The money was well spent:

To charity it went.

He has a big bank account,

With tons of money to count.

The candle at both ends I burn.

Tons of money I need to earn.

Monster
Sea monsters, strong to their fingertips,
Catch for their daily meals fish and ships.
Mouse
A mouse can’t speak,
But it can squeak.

Town Mouse said, “Do you like wheat?”

Country Mouse said, “Yes, let’s eat!”

Music
Beautiful music fills the air
When the wind caresses her hair.

Great music and dance

Put me in a trance.

Nectar
Life’s healing nectar:
The feel good factor.

Need
This family is in need
Of a charitable deed.

You should plant a seed

Of each thing you need.

News
The news that I heard
Was worse than absurd.

Night
People who abhor the night
Appreciate the lamplight.

Nose
In his nose,
Snotty woes.

Noun
Flock is a collective noun, and so is pride,
But you should cast waste-paper basket aside!
An example of a word used as a plural noun is scissors.
A few more words that come to mind include jeans, culottes and trousers.

Two not-so-common collective nouns:

A knot of toads; a pratfall of clowns.

Opportunity
“Thank you” is the perfect way to greet
Every opportunity you meet.

Overeat
Do not overeat,
Carb, veggie or meat.

Ox
Busy as an ox;
Cunning as a fox.

Page
If you turn to the next page,
You can read about the sage.

Line the floor of the bird cage

With the newspaper’s front page.

Pain
Don’t cause others pain.
Your joy will be slain.

Panic
When you get into a panic,
Self-possession is the tonic.

Parrot
Moving beaks,
Parrot speaks.
Participle
When it is used as a verbal, a present participle functions as an adjective:
The man said to the crying woman, “You do not have to worry—I am not vindictive.”

When it is used as a verbal, a past participle functions as an adjective, too:

The little boy came home with a broken arm and said, “Stay calm—no need to get in a
stew.”

The grammar champion of the college remained unbeaten

When she said, “The past participle of eat is eaten.”

You end up with a sentence cripple

When you dangle a participle.

Past
Let go of the past.
The future is vast.

Pen
The ink in my pen
Contains stories ten.

Perfection
Perfection is a rose,
Whose beauty clearly shows.

Perfume
This perfume has a nice scent,
Worth the money that I spent.

Two drops of perfume she wore:

Delightful when less is more.

Phone
She called me at nine
To say she felt fine.

She phoned me at nine

And said, “You are mine.”

Picnic
It was a nice picnic spot.
Far from our house it was not.
Picture
You’ve got that colour picture upside down.
The smile on the face has become a frown!

Pie
The window display caught her eye.
She suddenly longed for a pie.

Pill
Jack and Jill went up the hill.
Jack said, “Did you take your pill?”

Pillar
Darling, you are my pillar,
The owner of this villa!

Plane
I have to catch a plane.
I have to be in Spain.

Plural
The boy opened his book to take a peep,
And answered, “The plural of sheep is sheep.”

The plural of hoof is hoofs or hooves;

The plural of roof is roofs, not rooves.

According to a book I read, the plural of person is persons or people:

(a) Police are looking for the person or persons who murdered the school principal.
(b) “Nine people have agreed to donate to the fund,” said the happy school principal.

Poetry
There’s poetry in my head.
I hope it will soon be read.

Pond
Mosquitoes are fond
Of a stagnant pond.

Potion
This looks like an ordinary lotion.
It’s actually a strong love potion.

Preparedness
Preparedness keeps a person alive.
They’d be ready should danger arrive.

Preposition
Without the little preposition,
How can we have a composition?

Price
The price
Is nice.

It’s cheap at twice

The retail price.

Anything with a high price,

You really need to think twice.

Prize
Early to bed and early to rise:
You are giving yourself a big prize.

Probity
Probity is a cake
Which only some can bake.

Pronoun
The smart pupil’s correct answer earned the English teacher’s praise:
“Everyone is a pronoun; every one is a pronoun phrase.”

“Could you please explain to us the difference between you’re and your, Mr. Brown?”
“Well, you’re is the contraction of you are; your is a possessive pronoun.”

Prop
He used an old mop
As a movie prop.

Proverb
This is a proverb fine:
A stitch in time saves nine.

Pry
Sir, I do not wish to pry,
But are you a private eye?

Pun
A pun is a verbal clown.
It may well erase a frown.

Purse
He was a rich and handsome knight.
For her, it was love at purse sight.

Quack
The quack said to the crowd, “If you are sick,
My healing skills will restore your health quick.”

Quake
The quake made it shiver:
The bridge on the river.

Question Mark
“Will you please close the door does not need a question mark.
It’s a politely expressed command,” she said to Clark.

Queue
Why don’t you
Join the queue?

You, you and you,

Please join the queue.

There is only you

In the shortest queue!

Quicksand
Stuck in a quicksand,
Not what he had planned!

He was stuck in a quicksand,

And needed a helping hand.

Quote
The president cleared his throat.
We all waited for a quote.
R

Rain
It’s raining cats and dogs,
A fun time for the frogs.

Rainbow
With its bright colours, I reckon
A rainbow is the sky’s ribbon.

Rat
The rat eyed the cheese
And started to freeze.

Reading
Reading fiction,
My addiction.

Ready
Fully ready,
Slow and steady.

Rejection
“You’re a waste of my time,” said he.
“You will never be my sweet pea.”

Rest
After a complete rest,
Your work will be your best.

Rice
Chicken curry and rice
Whet the appetite twice.

I paid an exorbitant price

For a small packet of brown rice.

Roach
“Your house is dirty,” said the roach,
Its voice full of scornful reproach.

Romance
Embolden your heart
Or romance won’t start.

Root
Sturdy roots,
Juicy fruits.

Rose
I give her a stalk of rose.
Her happiness clearly shows.

Route
I like this route:
Hard work bears fruit.

Rumour
Baseless rumour,
Verbal tumour.

Rush
Let us join the gold rush.
There’ll be no scrum or crush.

Sacrifice
Sacrifice is only nice
At a reasonable price.

Scare
What happened? You gave us quite a scare.
We thought you’d been eaten by a bear.

Tortoise, you gave me quite a scare.

I thought you’d been beaten by Hare.

Scarecrow
With a perpetual frown,
Scarecrows always feel down.

A scarecrow, from the day he’s born,

Is the protector of the corn.

Seashell
She sold seashells by the seashore.
Nobody bought them for décor.

Seat
Have a seat.
Rest your feet.

Seed
A seed we sow
Will slowly grow.

Survival is hard for the seeds

If you don’t get rid of the weeds.

Unwanted seed,
Unwanted weed.

Forlorn seeds
Become weeds.

Plant a clean seed.

Wish it Godspeed.

Sell
He who has something to sell
Has many stories to tell.

Sentence
We learn about the subject of a sentence from the predicate:
The old ruler of the small kingdom decided to abdicate.

Shade
The shade of the tree
Is totally free.

Shade of wall,
Free for all.

Shadow
I manage to outrun
My shadow from the sun.

My shadow from the sun

Follows me for some fun.
Sheep
A weak old sheep
Died in its sleep.

Shell
Come out of your shell.
Feel socially well.

Shirt
I ordered a shirt bespoke,
With stunning pictures of yolk.

Shore
The children played by the shore.
The big waves left them in awe.

Shower
Morning showers
Soothe the flowers.

Sick
I don’t feel at all well.
I’ve lost my sense of smell.

An old man who was sick

Hoped to recover quick.

Sight
Out of sight, out of mind.
You are not so defined.

Silence
Deep silence is the software
For emotional repair.

Simile
When the English teacher asked for a simile from Todd,
The clever boy said, “As alike as two peas in a pod.”

Size
As a rough rule of thumb,
What’s the size of a crumb?

Sleep
Once in a blue moon,
I sleep until noon.

If you can’t get some shut-eye,

I’ll sing you a lullaby.

I couldn’t sleep a wink,

But it’s not what you think.

Sleuth
We need to hire a sleuth
To discover the truth.

Smile
The bride wore a big smile
As she walked down the aisle.

A winning smile,
Her facial style.

For her, smiling is a breeze.

There is no need for “say cheese”!

Smoking
“Stop smoking,” said a wise elf.
“Don’t make an ash of yourself.”

Smoking is a “lungevity” threat,

So give it up if you haven’t yet.

Snapshot
Flowers in a flowerpot
Deserve a colour snapshot.

Snooze
He had an afternoon snooze
And dreamed he went on a cruise.

Song
I really like this song.
It is six minutes long.

A beautiful song
Can be short or long.

You have a voice strong,

Perfect for this song.

I have a song to sing

For every day of spring.

Soul
With one foot in the grave,
His soul he tried to save.

Sound
The sound I like most to hear
Is your heartbeat in my ear.

Sow
A young sow was in a twitter:
She’d given birth to a litter.

Spa
You’ll be twice the man you are
If you spend some time at the spa.

Speech
A speaker must make his speech brief
Lest someone might exclaim, “Time thief!”

Spelling
“This is the difference—‘vomited’ is spelt with only one ‘t’,
But ‘benefitted’ is spelt with either one or two,” said he.

The atmosphere at the annual spelling bee of the school was electric:
One contestant added k, e and d to form the past tense of panic.

Let us put this to the vote:

‘Thank you note’ or ‘thank-you note’?

“Harrass” is a very common misspelling.

Remove one “r” to get the correct spelling.

Alright is alwrong.
All right is on song.

With “o’clock”, we spell out the number.

It’s ten o’clock—time for my slumber!

Spree
Our breathing spree:
The air is free.

Strike
Strike while the iron’s hot,
With all the strength you’ve got.

Stroll
Out of the house he stole
To take a little stroll.

Strong
You might be stronger.
I might live longer.

Stubborn
He has a stubborn streak
Which needs an urgent tweak.

Sultriness
Sultriness she dangles
From numerous angles.

Sun
The weak sun went out of sight
As it yielded to the night.

Swimsuit
She wore a swimsuit
For a fashion shoot.

Dressed in a swimsuit,
She looked very cute.

Tale
With a new twist in each tale,
His stories never get stale.

He told us tall tales

About sharks and whales.
Talent
Talent is a waste
If it’s not showcased.

Talk
She looked at me but did not whisper, speak or shout.
I felt I was talking to her cardboard cut-out.

Tavern
The magnificent old tavern
Was located in a cavern.

Tea
The experienced English teacher said to me,
“You can use either ‘iced’ or ‘ice’ before ‘tea’.”

Teaching
A friend said, “Teaching is my vocation.
My learning is in any location.”

Tears
Unkind remarks she hears
Fill her big eyes with tears.

Tenses
The new pupil failed to get a perfect score,
Not knowing that the past tense of see is saw.

Test
In the test you failed to shine;
You were mentally offline.

Study for the test,

And then do your best.

Text

Read the text,

Then press next.

Thief
A thief stole a fiction book.
His friend said, “Nice, what you took.”

A thief planned to burgle a house.

He’d be as quiet as a mouse.

“I steal food for my dinner.

I’ll never become thinner!”

He stole
My foal.

Thin
From hunger thin,
All bones and skin.

Thought
An unexpressed thought
Is not forward brought.

Thrift
Give your wallet a gift.
Practise the virtue of thrift.

Thrift is a noble virtue,

A monetary rescue.

Thumb
He is under his wife’s thumb.
No wonder he looks so glum!

Thunder
There’s thunder in the air.
There’re people running there.

Tie
An eye for an eye
Ends not in a tie.

Time
Thank God, we are almost there,
With forty minutes to spare.

Having a whale of a time,

She didn’t hear the clock’s chime.

Toil
After ten minutes of toil,
The fire made the kettle boil.
Tortoise
Under its protective thick shell,
A tortoise had a dizzy spell.

Tortoise won the race when Hare overslept.

The spectators laughed loudly when Hare wept!

The humble tortoise won the race.

The proud hare had a reddish face!

Tourist
A tourist meets new faces
In interesting places.

Transplant
My favourite aunt
Had a heart transplant.

Travel
I am a far cry from home,
Having a great time in Rome!

Tree
A deciduous tree grieves
When it sheds its autumn leaves.

Truth
Make truth your good friend.
Think it and hit send.

When truth is dead,

Lies triumph instead.

Tryst
They postponed the tryst
Because of the mist.

Turn
My dear, when will you learn
Not to speak out of turn?

Turncoat
The rebel leader cleared his throat.
He has no proof, thought the turncoat.
Twist
They all danced the twist
In the morning mist.

UFO
In the middle of the night,
I saw a UFO light.

Universe
The universe is vast.
Forever it will last.

Unthinkable
Wholly unthinkable,
Titanic sinkable.

Veal
The meal of tender veal
Is nice to the tongue’s feel.

Vengeance
Dismiss vengeance from your mind.
Peace in your heart you will find.

Verb
A transitive verb always takes an object:
The state police apprehended the suspect.

A transitive verb has a passive form:

The big tree was uprooted by the storm.

An intransitive verb does not take an object, and it has no passive form:
The head of the state prison is confident that the ex-inmates will reform.

“A verb can be both transitive and intransitive, Frank:

The torpedo sank the warship. / The warship quickly sank.”
The teacher said with a smile, “You are absolutely right, Jean.
The ‘to be’ verbs are be, am, is, are, was, were, being and been.”

For the subjunctive mood, we write or say “If I had…”

I am sure that ten million dollars would make me glad!

When “number of” is preceded by “the”, use a singular verb:

“The number of visitors to the fair is big. It’s just superb!”

When “number of” is preceded by “a”, use a plural verb:

A number of botanists have agreed to test the new herb.

There is an apple and an orange on the table.

Changing is to are will make the sentence “unstable”!

I saw the student write this down:

“Invite” is a verb and a noun.

Pray remember this lesson well:

Verbs show, adjectives merely tell.

When you choose a strong verb or noun,

An adjective begins to frown!

Verbal
What is a verbal? It’s a verb that functions as a different part of speech.
Gerund, participle, infinitive—we have an example of each!

Virus
A virus wearing a blindfold
Gave me a devastating cold.

Vitamin
He was advised not to shun
Vitamin D from the sun.

Vlogger
Where the two vloggers roam,
They call the place their home.

Voice
The love in her voice
Made my heart rejoice.

I simply had no choice.

I had to raise my voice.

His voice was very loud,

Like thunder in a cloud.

You have a beautiful voice.

Sing a nice song of your choice.

Volcano
The volcanic eruption
Occasioned life disruption.

Vote
The chairman cleared his throat.
Everyone cast their vote.

He said, “Give me your vote.”

I said, “You get my goat.”

Vowel
The answer to a question in a pop quiz:
Consonant and vowel describe what Y is.

Vulture
Hungry vultures in the blue sky:
The protagonist will soon die.

Wait
I think I will wait and see.
She may have good news for me.

Walker
Cobwebby old walking frame—
No one knows its owner’s name.

Wall
The writing is on the wall:
Gambling will cause his downfall.

Wallet
My bulgy wallet
Bought a gold bracelet.

My wallet in my pocket,
Fearful of the pickpocket.

Water
The rains are long overdue.
Water we going to do?

Water we found
Under the ground.

Weak
You will feel very weak
Until tomorrow week.

Weather
Fierce heat wave.
Weather slave.

Wedlock
On the wooden door I knock.
There’s no answer from wedlock.

Whale
An obese whale
Looked for a scale.

Why
“Do you want to ask me why?”
Said the spider to the fly.

Wife
I will protect you with me life,
Simply because you are my wife.

Wonderful wife,
Beautiful life.

Wig
The sudden gust of wind was so strong
My wig said sadly, “Mister, so long!”

Will
A codicil to his will:
His mind completely strong still.

Wind
Protect yourself from the cold wind
When it is very determined.

Window
Open a window, dear—
It is baking in here!

Wine
I can’t dine
Without wine.

Wink
She gives me a saucy wink.
She really likes me, I think.

A flirtatious wink,
Sexier than you think.

A wink can play a part

In giving love a start.

She gave him a saucy wink.

He lost the power to think.

Wisdom
He is blessed with old age.
His wisdom we can gauge.

Wise
You can be wise
With dreamy eyes.

Adjectival prize
Describes the word wise.

Witch
The midget witch has just escaped, sarge!
It’s terrible—small medium at large!

Witty
Please say something witty
In a manner pithy.
Wok
Look at this food in the wok:
Spinach cooked in chicken stock.

Womb
The two women first met in the delivery room.
It was splendiferous—one came from the other’s womb.

Words
Raising his hands in a victory dance,
Slim Chance says, “I’m better than Fat Chance!”

Although he has had many years of formal schooling,

He doesn’t know that a young goose is called a gosling.

She wrote five clipped words on her pad:

Memo, typo, flu, fridge and grad.

Sugar-coated words were spoken,

But promises would be broken.

Weigh your words in your mind.

Will they sound harsh or kind?

His plethora of words spoken

Are for a long time unbroken.

Work
They faced a stumbling block
And worked against the clock.

It is back-breaking work,
Which I will never shirk.

The boss said, “Pull your weight.

Work should not be third-rate.”

Worm
Every worm in the can
Has its say in the plan.

A squeamish gal will squirm

At the sight of a worm.

The worms wriggle

As they giggle.

Worry
I worry a lot:
Covid and whatnot.

Worth
Worth its weight in pure gold;
Can’t be further extolled.

Wrestle
Don’t wrestle with a foe.
You might injure a toe.

Writer
The final draft is the choice
Of the writer’s inner voice.

Be a better writer—
Make your writing tighter.

He was a bad speller

Who wrote a best-seller.

Writer’s Block
The writer was at the end of his tether,
For the words he wrote would not come together.

Writing
You can’t a story tell
If your ideas don’t jell.

Make it extremely plain

When you write to explain.

Every piece of writing will read nice

If the writer drafts it at least twice.

“You get my goat”

Was all she wrote.

Wrong
If you’re headstrong,
You may go wrong.
Y

Yawn
It’s awful to yawn
At the crack of dawn.

Yield
Work hard in the field;
Harvest a high yield.

Yoga
My health-conscious tabby cat
Practised yoga on a mat.

Zeal
Shoulder to the wheel
With unflagging zeal.

Zebra
I’ve heard of a cause celebre
That involved a stolen zebra.

Zest
A task done with zest
Deserves a good rest.

Zombie
Zombies are the living dead
Who fill us with utter dread.