BAND:SMART

succeed in the music business on your own terms

FROM ARTIST, LABEL OWNER AND ENTREPRENEUR

martin atkins
★ ★
★ ★
★ ★
WITH ADVICE FROM OVER 1OO INDUSTRY PROFESSIONALS ON:
RECORDING STRATEGIES - FROM THE SONG TO THE PRODUCER
A BETTER LIVE SHOW - FROM SOUND CHECK TO ENCORE
BOOKING YOURSELF - THE GLORIOUS HEADACHE
THE BAND - FROM REHEARSALS TO RECORDING - METHODS OF DISTRIBUTION
LEGAL - FROM COPYRIGHT TO BAND AGREEMENTS - TOURING
REVENUE STREAMS - A HANDS-ON APPROACH TO MERCHANDISING
HOW TO GIVE A GOOD INTERVIEW - HOW TO GET SIGNED AND WHY
Band:Smart
succeed in the music business on your own terms

martin atkins

First Educational Edition

© 2015 by Martin Atkins
All rights reserved. Copying and duplication in any form is a violation of US federal copyright law.
No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or
mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system,
without permission in writing from the publisher.

ISBN 978-0-9797313-7-2
 FOR MY FAMILY:
Katrina, Ian, Harrison, Sidney & Cole Vincent,
my Mum, Jan and Porridge, too.
When I finished my first book, Tour:Smart, I FedEx-ed it to my dad over in England. He had been ill
for many years, and I was frightened at the time that he might not survive long enough to see his son
actually write a book. No such worries now. Unfortunately, he passed a few years ago but I hope some of
his wisdom is in here. He introduced me to the world of Dale Carnegie and so much more that I slowly
keep realizing, so, thanks for that Dad. I miss you every day.

To all of the people who have sat down with me, on the phone or in person, or who have taken the time to
enlighten me and welcomed myself and my family into their lives, I thank you so very much. To everyone
who contributed, not just to this book, but to my education (and I hope yours), thank you.

Six years is a lot of time to be working on anything, but weirdly it gave me the space to make this more,
I hope, than a hilarious “how to MySpace” and come up with a more useful book of ideas that work in
any situation.
I’ve received some terrific help from the staff and students at Madison Media Institute and at SAE
Chicago, where I am currently Music Business Dept Chair. James Thomas and the entire SAE North
American team have shown nothing but unhesitating support, which is so very much appreciated. I feel
truly blessed to be a part of that global network of over 56 schools. In case you are interested, we live
this stuff every day.

Chris Ruppenthal has corralled interns, assisted with the Kickstarter and contributed articles himself
along the way through really large pieces of this.

Katie Crain was always there as a sounding board for me, as well as with dealing with interns at Invisible
and countless “last SXSW before we publish” years, too.

Joanna Quargnali-Linsley waded in fearlessly, too. Thank you.

My manager Susan Ferris will simply not believe that this is done! Thank you all for so much support..

Of course, although they are thanked elsewhere, everyone who helped with or donated to the Kickstarter
Campaign that made this possible — THANK YOU.

A lot, lot, lot of people have put sweat and time and care and love into this thing and, if you’ve seen my
crowdfunding lecture, you’ll know that not everyone made it to the other side.

It was always my idea that Eric McNary would lay this out. He did such an amazing job on Welcome To
The Music Business…You’re F**ked! We got a little bit of the way in before he was diagnosed with bile
duct cancer. We had such a great time laying out Wendy Day’s piece. Thank you Eric — you enabled me
to see how fuelling and powerful this relationship could be. Diana McNary was glorious and graceful as
we transitioned slowly and sadly forwards after you left us.

Jen Bachelder picked up the torch after Kelly Paulsen-Robbins ran with it for a while. I change and write
as I go, with ideas from words, creating pictures and ideas that clarify or necessitate more writing and
constant new ideas and contributions from wherever I am or whoever I am lucky enough to be hanging
with. What a nightmare that must be – so thank you Jen for dealing with me in accelerated “this is the
last week for sure mode” for over two years and allowing me to keep changing and adding until this very
last day. That is priceless for an a.d.d. scattered plate-spinner like myself. Priceless. Thank you, Jen.

A much needed boost towards the end of this as Bob Boilen asked me to participate in a small piece every
couple of weeks for the All Songs Considered blog for NPR. Of course, a distraction and change causing
creativity, but all good and a much needed push towards this finish line. Thank you.

Lastly, to everyone that does amazing stuff when they shouldn’t (and others couldn’t). To everyone that
conjures magic out of a basket of crap — thank you for inspiring me, making me and others realize that
anything really is possible, and keeping possibility alive.

Thank you all so very very much.

Martin

XXXX
Table of Contents
1. SUCCESS ..................................................................................................................................1

Viking Law: Act like a Viking 7

Check Your Head! Anthony Spina 8
In Case of Panic Attack, Breathe Into Bag; Kylee Swenson Gordon 9
Why Would Any Sane Person Subject Themselves to This Foolishness? Greta Brinkman 10
Inspire Awesomeness; Lance Curran 11
Deconstruction; Casey Rain [S-Endz] 12
3 Simple Rules to “Making It”; David Lewis 13

2. WHO? WHAT? WHEN? WHERE? WHY?......................................................................................15

Consequence of People 18
More Than One; Lee Jarvis 19
Day Jobs 22
Balancing Act; Micah Solomon 22
Best Day Job Whilst Being in a Band? 23
Why Bands Break Up 24
Forming Your Own Band; Anders Odden 25
Choosing a Singer 26
Auditioning; Alessandro Quargnali-Linsley 27
BAND:SMART

There’s Never Been a Better Time to Redefine What a Band Is; Moldover 29
Pick a Leader; Hillel Frankel 35
Seven Deadly Sins: Things That Will Kill a Band Deader Than Fried Chicken; Michael Jolkovski 36

3. BAND NAMES .........................................................................................................................41

Trademark Your Name; Hillel Frankel 43

Case Study: Lauren Alectrona of Alectrona 43
SEO: How to Choose a Band Name so You Will Be Found Online; Chris Bolton 44
Logos Have Big Mouths: What is Yours Saying? JaGoFF Publishing 47

4. SONGS ..................................................................................................................................49

Top Ten Rules for Better Songwriting; Michael Jolkovski 52

5 Things You Should Know Before Writing Political Songs; Jon Ostrow 54

5. IMAGE ..................................................................................................................................57

Good Imagery Still Matters; Micah Solomon 59

Getting the Best Out of a Photo Shoot; Paul Natkin 60
Do Something! Mary Sweeney 62

6. REHEARSAL ...........................................................................................................................65

Build Your Own Rehearsal Room 66

Your Band’s Rehearsal Spot; Kent Nielsen 68
Be More Effective in Rehearsals; George Massenburg 70

7. PRESS KITS & PR ..................................................................................................................71

Danger! Do Not Use! Words to Avoid in Your Band Bio; Brian Thompson 73
The Perfect Press Kit; Ariel Hyatt 74
Writing A Great Press Release; Christo Ruppenthal 76
The Principles of Good PR; Wendy Brynford-Jones 77
For Bands That Are Putting Together a Press Kit to Submit for a Festival; Jerry Fink 82

8. GETTING A GIG .....................................................................................................................85

First Impressions; Cathy Dethmers 86

Booking Strategy; Kevin Breuner 87
What a Promoter Wants to Hear to Book You; Dan Steinberg 88
3 Things Every Band Should Know; Joshua Liston 89
How to Get a Show For the First Time; Ramona Downey and Ursula Rodriguez 91
Things Bands Can Do to Book More Shows; Chris Bracco 93
 TABLE OF CONTENTS

9. OUTSIDE THE BOX ..................................................................................................................95

House Concerts; Fran Snyder 97

How I Made $25K On A 2-Month House Concert Tour
(And How You Can Too) Shannon Curtis 99
Stay Local! Jon Ostrow 102
Local Touring: Play Within 18O Mile Radius; Frank Mauceri 103
Outside the Venue; Tony Guidry 103
Get Out of Town! 104
Band Battles 105
Does Gigswapping Always Work Out? Greg Whiteside 108
Buy Ons / Pay to Play 109

10. HOW TO MAKE YOUR SHOW AN EVENT..................................................................................111

Tickets 117
10 Tips to Get Real Fans (Not Just Friends) to Shows; Madalyn Sklar 117
“Will Play for Gas Money” Steve Harm 120
Pimpin’ for Tips Can be a Piece of Cake! Nancy Apple 122
Happy Birthday Django; Christo Ruppenthal 123
Punchy the Robot; Nicholas Kloss 125
15 Reasons Your Show Will Succeed 126

11. THE SHOW ........................................................................................................................133

A Good Sound Starts with Good Gear; Lee Popa 135

Sound People and Balance; Mark Rubel 136
Backup Everything! Tom VX 137
Top 10 Live Sound Mistakes; Brad Pack 138
Music Technology & the Contemporary Band Tips; Phelan Kane 139
Theatre/er 140
Top 5 Mistakes Bands Make with Their Live Show; Tom Jackson 142
Being Special on Stage; Josh White 144
Stage Wear; DJ Pleasure Kitten 145
Lighting and Staging; Brenda Siegelman 146
How to be a Better Opening Band 149
Setlists; Jon Ostrow 151
What to Do When No One Shows Up 153
Gig Autopsy 154
Share a Bit of Yourself Next Time You Perform; Tom Jackson 155
BAND:SMART

12. STREET TEAMS ..................................................................................................................157

Attention Local Bands! Steve Harm 159

13. COVER BANDS ....................................................................................................................161

Covering Your Butt When You Cover a Song; Joanna Quargnali-Linsley 163
Three Ways to Do a Great Cover Song; Jessi Frey 164
Building a Successful Entertainment Act or Cover Band; AJ Menconi 165

X1. GOOD ADVICE FROM BAAD PEOPLE: PART 1 .........................................................................169

Guitar Tips; Jim Clark 170

Bass Player Tips; Andrew McKinney 171
Vocal Tips; Nikki Lamborn 172
More Vocal Tips; Chris Connelly 173
Live Tips; Mark Williams 174
Ticketing; Victoria Girot 175
Earn It Yourself ’s Top Ten Pieces of Advice to Bands; Sarah Saturday 176
Reasons Your Band Isn’t Moving Forward; Josh Hogan 178
An Artist’s Best One, Two Punch; Tony Guidry 179

14. COMMUNITY ......................................................................................................................183

Give Back! Sarah Saturday 184

So‘Cal So‘Cial 186
Support Your Local Music Scene; Ruth Daniel 187
Networking And Building Your Brand; Shaun Barrett 189
New Yorkers Eat Their Young; Chvad Bernard 191

15. MERCHANDISE ...................................................................................................................193

Designing Merchandise 194

Screen Printing 197
Manufacturing On Demand 198
Merch Booth 199
Merch Tips 200
Pro Merch Tips! 201
Logo Hijack 202
Top 1O Tips To Consider Before Ordering Band Merch; Christopher Miles 204
Making Merch On No Budget; Kimberly Freeman 206
Bundling Tickets, Merchandise and Common Sense; Billy Geoghegan 208
Accidental Merchandise; Justin Pearson 210
 TABLE OF CONTENTS

16. THE STUDIO ......................................................................................................................211

Choosing a Studio 212

Preparation for the Studio 214
The Window of Perception in the Studio (and Elsewhere) 216
Choosing a Producer 218
1O Things to Do Before Going Into the Studio; George Massenburg 220
Project Studio; Julian Herzfeld 222
Consider Recording at a School! Victoria Girot 223
Cheap Recording: Is It a Myth? Tom Whittaker 224
Recording Without a Budget; Kimberly Freeman 226
How Tokyo Police Club Succeeded in the Studio; James Pew 228
Studio Tips; Howie Beno 229
Climbing the Engineer Ladder & the Gig Bag; Kevin Guarnieri 232
Save Time. Save Money. Kevin Guarnieri 233
Welcome to the Studio; Reid Hyams 236
Choosing an Engineer; Julian Herzfeld 237
If It’s Not Broke, Don’t Fix It; Sean McMahon 239
A Recording Studio is No Place for Democracy; Jim Powers 240
Recording: Top 5 Studio Mistakes; James Pew 241

17. MASTERING .......................................................................................................................243

Mastering; Tristan James 245

Tips to Prepare Your Music For Mastering; Todd Thomas 246
Mastering; Maor Appelbaum 247

18. PACKAGING ........................................................................................................................253

19. DISTRIBUTION ...................................................................................................................275

Distribution – D.I.WHY? 277

1O Recommendationsfor Distribution Deals; Ed Seaman 280
6 Artist Tips for Making More Money with CDs; Tony van Veen 282
Stand for Something; Scott Cohen 283
1O Ways to Make the Most of Your Next Digital Music Release; Chris Robley 284
Notes from the Other Side; Tommy Borscheid 286

20. DEMOS ..............................................................................................................................289

1O Reasons Why Most Demos are Rejected; Christopher Knab 293

BAND:SMART

21. AGENTS .............................................................................................................................295

The Chicken and the Egg; Tom Windish 298

The Agent; Bob Lefsetz 299
When Should a Band Consider Getting an Agent? Phil Battiato 300
Adding a Little Something; Gerry Gerrard 302

22. MANAGEMENT ...................................................................................................................305

The Manager; Bob Lefsetz 307

A Manager Should Have Your Back; Alexander Fruchter 309
Management: Finding Your New Best Friend? Shaun Barrett 311
Advice; Mark Kates 313
Management is Changing; Susan Ferris 314
Then and Now; Larry White 316

23. FESTIVALS ..........................................................................................................................319

Music Conference Survival Guide 320

Festival Advice; Nate Van Allen 322
Tune Up and More; Mark Durante 323
Ten Reasons Why Your Band Was Not Selected for That Festival; Fabrico Nobre 324

X2. GOOD ADVICE FROM BAAD PEOPLE: PART 2 .........................................................................327

How to Make an Extra 1OOk in the Next Year 328

24. MARKETING .......................................................................................................................333

Do The Opposite: D.T.O. 334

Do Something Diffenrt 335
Setting Short-Term, Mid-Term, and Long-Term Goals; Jon Ostrow 337
Marketing Your Release: 8 Stupid Album Release Screw Ups; Chris Seth Jackson 338
Off The Wall Music Marketing Tips and Ideas; Adrian Fusiarski 339
Let’s Define Real Marketing; Julie Niehoff 343
5 Steps to Getting Fans Talking About You and Your Music; Andy Sernovitz 348
Your Record is Finished, Now What? Jaime “Black” de’Medici 350
The Trust Strategy 351

25. FREE IS THE NEW BLACK .....................................................................................................353

Discussion with Martin Atkins, Jon Allegretto, and Jagoff Publishing 355
Pay What You Want; Josh Hogan 358
 TABLE OF CONTENTS

26. BUSINESS MODELS & REVENUE ............................................................................................361

Revenue Sources 366

In Defense of 1OOO True Fans: An interview with Matthew Ebel 367

27. CROWDFUNDING ................................................................................................................369

RocketHub is the World’s Crowdfunding Machine; Vlad Vukicevic 379

How Does an Artist Get Started; Benji Rogers 380
Patreon Do's and Don'ts; Matthew Ebel 382

28. WORKING WITH BRANDS .....................................................................................................385

Sponsorships and Endorsements 388

Want an Endorsement? Dennis Mollan 389
Recap 391
Vestal Watches 394

29. LABELS ..............................................................................................................................397

Do It Yourself; David Lewis 401

Indie Labels vs. Major Labels; Wendy Day 402
A Label Choosing You; Rob Miller 412
A Label is a Filter; Alexander Fruchter 413
Blues Perspective; Bruce Iglauer 416
36O Deals; Fueled by Ramen 418
Working with Your Label; Nan Warshaw 419
Tips for Helping Your Record Label Help You; Scott Schaefer 420
You Think You Want a Record Deal? Tim Donohue 422
Friends Don’t Let Friends Start Labels 426
Three One G; Justin Pearson 427
An Umbrella in the Record Label Sh*tstorm; Joel Gausten 428
Things I Tell Indie Artists; Rick Barker 429

30. COPYRIGHT & PUBLISHING ..................................................................................................431

Girl Talk; Greg Kot 434

What Do Bands Need To Know About Copyright? Joanna Quargnali-Linsley 437
Copyright Your Songs; Hillel Frankel 440
Copyright Basics; Keith Hatschek 442
Publishing 444
What is Music Publishing? Chris Robley 445
xvi BAND:SMART

Understanding Publishing; Christopher Cabott 446

Top Tips To Get Your Music Placed In Movies, TV Shows,
Video Games & Commercials; Hypebot 448
Signs Your Band Is Getting Scammed; Matt Voyno 452
8 Ways to Get Your Music Licensed for TV, Games, and Films; Matt Stevens 453
Sync Tips; Broadjam 455
How to Capitalize on a Sync Placement: An Interview with Glass Pear; Chris Robley 457
Sync Tips; Gabe McDonough 458

31. SOCIAL MEDIA ...................................................................................................................459

Japanese Drinking Rules 462

F.A.M.E. 463
Can You Eat? Then You Can Master Social Media! Ariel Hyatt 465
Social Media; Ryan Manno 468
Things People Do Wrong on Facebook; Andrew Wilkinson 470
Things People Do Wrong on Twitter; Andrew Wilkinson 472
Well, What is a Good Digital Music Strategy? Virginie Berger 474
Mobile: It's Not Just a City in Alabama! 476

32. EMAIL MARKETING .............................................................................................................477

1O Email Marketing Tips for Musicians; David Rose 479

33. WEBSITES ..........................................................................................................................481

Building Websites; Lloyd Aur Norman 483

5 Things for Musicians to Consider Before Building a Website; Brian John 484
Website Dos and Don'ts; David Dufresne 485
Your Website; Virginie Berger 486

34. SEO .................................................................................................................................489

Search Engine Optimization: SEO is the New A&R; Gary Kuzminski 490
Tips & Strategies You Aren’t Hearing From High Priced Consultants; Tim Toomey 495
Optimize Your Site’s Images for Better Search Rankings; Christo Ruppenthal 497

35. ANALYTICS .........................................................................................................................499

Analytics; Jon Ostrow 501

Understanding the Importance of Metadata and Artwork; Chris Duncan 502
 A NOTE FROM MARTIN ATKINS xvii

X3. GOOD ADVICE FROM BAAD PEOPLE: PART 3.........................................................................503

Early Mistakes You Can Avoid; Marcy Rauer Wagman, Esq 504
3 Things I Wish I Had Started Earlier; Greta Brinkman 505
How to Thrive in the (New) Music; Micah Solomon 506

36. RADIO ...............................................................................................................................507

Airplay 1O1; Bryan Farrish 509

Choosing Your Single; Jesse Cannon 509
Radio Do’s, Don’ts, Tales of Failure & Success... All in a Thin Candy Shell; Dee “Biatch” Biznatch 510
I Love Music; James Van Osdol 512

37. PRESS & BLOGS ..................................................................................................................513

How to Give Good Interviews 513

Stop the Chatter; Alexander Fruchter 516
How To Be Interviewed; Jason Arnopp 517
Getting Press And Covered By Blogs; Jesse Cannon and Todd Thomas 520

38. VIDEO ...............................................................................................................................527

YouTube 529
Distribution Techniques; Max Goldberg 530
1O Kinds of Videos to Promote Your Music; CD Baby 532
5 Tips to YouTube Promotion; CD Baby 533

39. ACCOUNTING .....................................................................................................................535

Accounting; Lisa Malina 536

Making Band Money Make Sense; Josh Hogan 541

40. LEGAL ...............................................................................................................................543

Haunted House 544

A Few Basic Elements to Any Contract 547
1O Reasons to Read a Contract (Or Have a Lawyer Read It); Chrissie Scelsi 548
Two Legal Must Do’s for Your Band that Will Save You One Day; Hillel Frankel 550
Why and When Do You Need A Manager? Tim Donohue 552
Want Long Term Success? Create Your Band Agreement Today! Jo-Na Williams Esq. 560
What to Do When Someone Leaves the Band; Alessandro Quargnali-Linsley 562
Leaving a Band Gracefully; Maureen Herman 565
BAND:SMART

41. Blogging ..........................................................................................................................569

Create a Blog; Virginie Berger 572

Band Blogging Worthy of Your Fans’ Attention; Chris Robley 573

42. Green ...............................................................................................................................575

Daytime Event 577

Smog Veil; Frank Mauceri 578
Vans Warped Tour; Kevin Lyman 579

43. Sex and Drugs ...................................................................................................................581

Be Nice to Groupies; Cynthia Plaster Caster 584

Be Nice to Groupies; Cynthia Plaster Caster 585

X4. GOOD ADVICE FROM BAAD PEOPLE: PART 4 .........................................................................587

The Truth About Cats and Dogs; Joanna Weber 588

A Product So Good, It Sells Itself; Rev. John Wheeler IV 592
How to Record 18 Bands in 10 Hours; Mark Williams 598
12 Venues You Need to Put Your Stickers In; Kosha Dillz 600

Appendix ...............................................................................................................................603

Additional Packaging Examples 606

Happy Birthday Django Cake Recipe; Christo Ruppenthal 607
Bonus Material; Andrew Wilkinson 608
Online Tool Index 609

Glossary ................................................................................................................................611

Index .....................................................................................................................................623
TABLE OF CONTENTS
xx BAND:SMART
 A NOTE FROM MARTIN ATKINS xxi

a note from martin atkins

TIME MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE.
For an artist just starting out, the wall of death you are facing is just time — nothing, nothing is very
complicated. It’s just time. Lack of time leads to lack of attention to detail and stupid career bending
mistakes. Time and attention make all the difference.

The guy with the book that tells you about success, hit singles, fast cars and swimming pools paid for his
a long time ago. He’s re-telling how he did it. It's a memoir, not a battle plan. The guy that tells you, “You
must have an amazing collection of black and white photographs” is related to a photographer or selling
photographic paper on the side. Get it, yet?

Listen to yourself in all of this: you’ll need to read between the lines of all of the books that are out there
about the music business (28,716 at last count). Be brave.

Look in the bathroom mirror… get some paper towels and Windex, clean off the toothpaste snowstorm,
look at the half-empty bottle of Adderall, wonder where they all went, spray some cologne, close the door,
and LOOK, IT’S YOU!

DON’T WAIT TO BE DISCOVERED. DISCOVER YOURSELF.

Carry your own gear, help other people, and shut up occasionally. At some point you’ll find yourself up
a creek, reluctant to use your 1960s humbucker sunburst Gibson Les Paul as a paddle in case the dirty
water tarnishes the finish before you are even halfway through the payments. The real ones just do it.
They bleed and cry and whatever the insurmountable obstacles, they make it happen on whatever level
they can. Looking like you’re making it on a higher level than you are isn’t making it at all. You’ve just
swapped out your green belt in some sleazy martial arts laundry mistake, and every day you wear it
tarnishes the belt that you actually do have.

You just have to work 10 times harder than you thought you ever would to do anything. There are 3 to 5
million bands on Facebook, ReverbNation, and whatever else. In the past, if you wanted to release music,
you needed to have $5,000-$10,000, be independently wealthy, or injured in a car accident to be able to
afford to do that. Now, it’s great that everybody can make music and put it up on the internet, but if you
want to get some attention and play shows you have to be working harder and smarter than ever.

Before anything else, take responsibility for your music; don’t blame anybody for anything because it’s
just too easy to blame a bad manager, a lame agent, a crappy record label. You can blame all kinds of
things; you can blame the weather, “it was snowing in Denver.” You played there on December 23rd you
idiot, of course it was snowing! Pay attention, stop blaming, take responsibility, and work 9 days a week,
28 hours a day.

There is no right or wrong:

THERE ARE NO RULES EXCEPT THE RULES YOU IMPOSE UPON YOURSELF.
xxii BAND:SMART

BE
BRAVE

Photo: Sudarshan Bhat

 A NOTE FROM MARTIN ATKINS xxiii

5 hours/day

GET SUN MON TUES WED THUR

1.5
FRI SAT

days/week

the
FUCK 0.8
JANUARY

weeks/month

out of
BED 2.5
2014
months/year

Remove the barriers between you, your songs and your recordings. Remove the barriers between you and your
fans, and where there is a barrier that you can’t remove, put your fingerprints and your DNA all over it.

If you’re up at 5am you are 5 hours ahead of the person that gets up at 10am. It may not seem like much
but at the end of the week you’re now 35 hours ahead of that rival, and 1,820 hours ahead by the end of
the year. So get out of bed!

Is there a limit to where this can go?

If you choose to record unlistenable horrible songs with controversial or offensive (whatever that is)
content then, in terms of the size of your audience — there is a limit. IT IS UP TO YOU. (I believe
Henry Ford was correct when he said ”whether you believe you can or you can’t — both are true.”) Now,
more than ever, the promise of the punk rock, post punk, industrial, hip hop, black metal, alt country,
D.I.Y., EDM, chip tune, whatever, revolution is tangible, — REAL. You are in charge of all aspects of
the evolution of your songs, your ideas and, ultimately, your career.

You are now connected directly to your audience — they just don’t know it yet.

As things grow, you will learn not only the things that can be delegated and the way to communicate
those tasks, but you will also begin to learn who can be trusted with them.

There’s no such thing as traditional efficiencies when dealing with the world of art and music.

As I have said many times, success, or, sorry, $UCCE$$! boils down to one simple necessity — the ability
xxiv BAND:SMART

to sustain, keep going: left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, barefoot, nail, blood, emergency room,
tetanus shot, wheelchair, recovery, left foot, right foot.

The nature of success is having the drive, stamina, sustained concentration, calloused palms, and psyche
to triumph though all of the crap and keep looking into the distance: for another great show, a heart
fuelling cheer, another t-shirt sale , or an enthusiastic word from a fan. How many of those people will be
the reason your show succeeds three years from now? Maybe one of them will be your manager, merch
person, or partner.

How many bands would be grateful for $800? That’s the amount of tour support the label that wouldn’t
sign you wouldn’t give you. You can save that by planning, having a larger range of merch, and a tip jar over
a couple of weeks. There are plenty of things you need to waste money on as you develop as an artist: a
huge paper mache octopus that seemed like a good idea but never made it back into the van after the first
‘beware of the octopus’ CD release party, the new audio effect, the ridiculously expensive lighting that made
everyone look worse, the badly conceived bagpipe overdub on track three. But none of these are really a
waste in the technical sense — each experience is a valuable part of your creative journey. Fail faster!

Everyone is saying you don’t need a label anymore. Well, duh! You never have! Build your own Great
Wall of China one brick at a time. And, for some, IS inspiring. This idea that you can “Bob The Builder”
your own career. Can we do it? Well, as the post industrial German rock band would say, “Yes, we’re Can!”

By all means, read this book. There’s some good stuff in it! Or just hang around in the store here for a
while and write down some good bits. If you can’t afford it, just put it in your pocket and steal it. No one
will notice. If they do, you can blame it on me and point to this, but let’s make that the last of the blaming.
Now, get on with creating your own success!

Peace, love, respect.

Martin Atkins
Never mind the other stuff.
Father of four!

I saw U2 in 1980 at a club in London called the

Rock Garden. Me, U2 and 16 other people And 20
years later — bang! Overnight sensation!

What would a transformed, sustainable, just, and profitable music business look like? That’s the only question we ask here.
It doesn’t matter what’s broken, what doesn’t work, how screwed up it is that everyone’s downloading for free or... it’s “what
will work?” Because, people love music, more than ever. They want to be around music, they love artists, they connect
with artists more than ever, music is more a part of people’s lives, and we have analytical proof that that’s true. How do
we monetize that new business in a brand new way? We have to pretty much forget we were ever in the record business.

This is possible. This new business is possible.

- Tom Silverman
 success

I thought that success was a house with a pool in LA flanked with palm trees. It really confused me when we had a
worldwide hit single and I didn’t feel very good. It took a while to realize I just wasn’t happy. At that point it’s tough to get
advice from anyone... you have to trust whatever internal barometer you have.

It’s like: a symphony between the music, the marketing, the imagination, the stage show, the ability of the band to promote
themselves/make friends/be nice, the popularity of their chosen genre and the availability of transportation. It’s teamwork
except you, the person reading this, you are all of the team members and there’s no high in team.

I’m not saying ‘don’t have ambition’ — you HAVE to have it. But if your head is always looking up
When it gets good...
into the clouds, then you’ll miss the NEXT step — which is just a little bit higher than the place you
it gets worse.
are standing right now.
– Jeanette Turner

1
2 BAND:SMART

I DON’T KNOW how you can put 20,000 people in a stadium, but I know that if there were two
people sitting on a fictitious couch in the corner of the room right now – that if you were to make friends
with them – or at least make contact, have a conversation, exchange your music, a CD, a shirt, a download
card whatever for an e-mail address – then all you need to do is THIS VERY THING 9,999 more times
and you have your 20,000 people!

This would also fall into the motivational

poster category of “it's not the destination,
it’s the free tickets to see Journey.”

Of course, this means that, packed in your

new shiny diversified skill set, people skills
needs to be in there – don’t fool yourself –
people aren’t born with these skills – the more
you practice – the better you will become at
anything. I’m VERY shy and look at me –
sitting alone in a basement typing!

If you’ve seen my lectures you’ll know that

this is the point where I play my home Success is like bad gas or
movies of the Great Wall of China – a appendicitis. It’s internal.
terrific metaphor for success – on the one
hand you can stand off to a distance, hands
on hips shaking your head, wondering how
on earth they created this amazing 7th
wonder of the world – OR you can realize
that its just a pile of bricks.

Start your own pile of bricks.

After 6 or 7 months, you’ll have a bit of a wall going on and people will stop and ask “what are you
doing?” and you can answer with pride! “I’m building the Great Wall of China #2: The squeekquel!”

They’ll say, “this is ridiculous,” “you are an idiot” and “I preferred you when you were drinking” and then
they’ll ask,“how can I help?”

Because people will help with wild crazy crusades that no sane individual would undertake. When
everything makes perfect sense, then all you have is a business plan... and who cares about that!

You have to go 1 by 1 – just like an

artist in a gallery.
– Chuck D

Don’t listen to people who say it is uncool for an artist to understand their business. Allowing yourself
to get ripped off because you preferred to wallow in ignorance, is certainly not rock’n’roll.
- Olaf Furniss
 Chapter 1 | SUCCESS 3

Don’t be intimidated by the road ahead. As an independent today it’s easy to be overwhelmed with all the tasks ahead. Don’t be. How do you eat an elephant?
One bite at a time. You build your list one fan at a time. Sell them one CD at a time. There are no magic bullets. Be patient, work hard, and stay passionate.

- Tony van Veen

The ONLY reason to attempt to make a living as a musician is because you can’t help yourself. You must be so passionate about your craft that
driving 4-10 hours per day every day, eating bad road food, sleeping on cold floors, not getting 1/2 the sleep you need, getting screwed over again
and again, etc., doesn’t faze you. If you have a decent day job and can’t afford to leave for months on end to tour, then admit to yourself now that your
music is your hobby, not your profession. Real labels can only afford to work with serious musicians. You will lose money the first few years; if you do
everything right and have luck on your side, you could break even the next few years; if you continue to do everything perfectly and get insanely lucky,
you may earn a living from your music. It will be 97% grind and 3% glamour. It will never be an easy life.
– Nan Warshaw

ONE OF THE LARGEST OBSTACLES TO YOUR SUCCESS MIGHT

BE YOU?!?
How tragic is it, with all of the obstacles to overcome (finances, shyness, geography, technical stuff,
workload stuff ) that one of the largest obstacles to your success might be YOU?!? I have seen this so
many times it’s not funny anymore – I have also been this person many times. I could hide behind the
fact that I’m shy and sometimes I know that people take the manifestations of shyness as an aloofness
– which sucks! BUT, be careful that your insecurities don’t manifest themselves as some kind of raucous
jerk type behavior because you think that’s how rockstars act – the real stars are NICE to people, they
connect with their fans – that’s all that’s left, really, and the essence of all of this – the connection – with
you, the music, the lyrics, whatever – you can either help it along – or destroy it.

You have to create a FACE TIME CONTINUUM!

Unfortunately, any opportunities (to fail or shine) will be accompanied and multiplied by the x-factor,
karma, and Murphy’s law.

According to Nan Warshaw, "It will be 97% grind and 3% glamour."

Ouch.

I hope this all helps. So far, from a scientific standpoint, it looks like it boils down to this: Don’t start a
band whatever you do. If you won’t listen to me and you do start a band, then DO NOT get in a van, a
bus, or god forbid a PLANE. Don’t do drugs, a sandwich, or anyone else’s girlfriend. Make sure you hire
a lawyer (or two!) before you begin playing any instrument. Don’t leave the country. Don’t write any songs
and don’t come up with a bandname, an album cover, or t-shirt design.

It’s not enough just to be great.

Being great is the price of entry.
– Mike Bailey
4 BAND:SMART

Remember, for a long time, it looked like Ginger Spice leaving the Spice Girls was the end. But, now they
are reunited and better than ever... just remember that when everything seems hopeless!

Don’t be in a hurry. So many people are aiming for something huge like “I want this album to be #1!”
People think in very grandiose, massively successful terms, but really, sometimes all you need in any
business is just the ability to get through to next week and the week after and to do it again and to do
another show and to record another song and if you can keep doing that, you keep getting incrementally
better and you’ll eventually get to where you can be: learning, growing along the way.

Train for success. People train for everything! Marathons, driving tests, hotdog-eating competitions!
Why on earth wouldn’t you train for something as huge, as dangerous, as awe inspiring, and as potentially
rewarding as this? Anything, except perhaps the economy, can be fixed.

Kemmons Wilson, who started Holiday Inn

Success often has less to do with number of fans and said, “You walk through the doors that are open.”
more to do with an artist’s ability to engage and interact Sounds sensible, so check yourself. You might
with their fan base. be hammering on the one door that you think
– Benji Rogers is right for you — the right door is the one you
can get open.

Remember that the definition of a successful musician is one who is making a living
playing music. That’s a great goal. Like with high school football players trying to
become NFL players, one in a hundred thousand makes it. But in music there are
minor leagues. If you can make a living playing music you love for a 100 people in a
bar, then you’re a success. You’re just not a star.
– Bruce Iglauer

Success is an incremental pa
per trail
of ticket stubs and the echo
of ap
one person at a time, until, m plause
agically,
you find the tipping point.
 Chapter 1 | SUCCESS 5

Do what you love. Do NOT hedge your bets and do NOT

doom yourself with a back-up plan — just GO FOR IT!
Listen to, have faith in your inner voice: it doesn’t lie.
Hotel Steps, San Diego
– David Rosen
6 BAND:SMART
 Chapter 1 | SUCCESS 7

Viking Law: act like a Viking

The Vikings roamed the plains from the 700’s or so to the 1100’s. Let's have a huge laugh and see what
crazy ideas they had so we can laugh, re-assure ourselves that moving forward is the way to go. The past
is bad and a little bit smelly and that we are modern, evolved, and know an awful lot...

BE BRAVE AND AGGRESSIVE BE PREPARED

• Be Direct • Keep Weapons in Good Shape
• Grab All Opportunities • Keep in Shape
• Use Varying Methods of Attack • Find Good Battle Comrades
• Be Versatile and Agile • Agree on Important Points
• Attack One Target at a Time • Choose ONE Chief
• Don’t Plan Everything in Detail
• Use Top Quality Weapons

BE A GOOD MERCHANT KEEP THE CAMP IN ORDER

• Find Out What the Market Needs • Keep Things Tidy and Organized
• Don’t Promise What You Can’t Keep • Arrange Enjoyable Activities Which Strengthen
• Don’t Demand Overpayment The Group
• Arrange Things So That You Can Return • Make Sure Everybody Does Useful Work
• Consult All Members of the Group for Advice

Be like a Viking! I don’t mean get the hat. That’s external, temporary, made of plastic, and easily removed...
I mean inside.

It’s much
Who gives the best advice? My intuition. easier to
fix the m
- Gary Vaynerchuk usic than
the attitu
de.

If you want to be happy in showbiz (or any creative field), listen to that voice inside you.
Even if it says “Forget it” sometimes. Work with your friends. Avoid chasing fame or
money. Just do what you want to do, when and how you want to do it. And if it’s not
making you happy, quit. Quit hard, and quit often. Eventually you’ll end up somewhere
that you never want to leave.
– Bobcat Goldthwait
8 BAND:SMART

Check Your Head!

Anthony Spina
CHECK YOURSELF:
Take a mental inventory of yourself, your band, your surroundings and your life.
Right now. If any of it is for even a split second Strugs, cut it or change it. What is
Strugs? Excellent question. To find the answer it is easier to define what being Non-
Strugs means. A wise gentleman by the name of Corey Smith defined Non-Strugs as
“perpetually aspiring to not hurt in all aspects of one’s life.” So before you even begin
to read further you must rid yourself, your band, your life or anything that could be
negatively affecting your success. Or in Smith’s words, would be considered Strugs. This
can be a band member who is a complainer or doesn’t show up to practice, not believing
and fully committing to being awesome all the time or a general lack of motivation,
commitment and the overall understanding that you are ready to take over the world.
Assess your current scene, wherever that may be.

Don’t look at where you fit into the spectrum, create your own place. Stand up, stand
out. Don’t worry about whatever everyone else is doing. Authenticity always wins. But...

THE INTER-WEBS:
If you are a band now you are coming of age at one of the most unique times in music
history. The classic “play as many shows as you can, build up a local following and wait for a
label to pick you up” is dead. The Internet is the best thing to happen to the music industry, ever. Because it puts the
power back in your hands. Technology has made it easy and affordable to record your own music. The Internet has
made it easy to get your music “out there.” But putting your music on the Internet is just the beginning.

You now have access to so many different forms of media on the Internet it can be overwhelming.Take videos
of you playing live. At a show, on the streets, in the back of a car, anywhere! Post that on YouTube, etc. and get
people involved. Put a face to your music. Do behind the scenes videos, interviews, “A Day in the Life”, etc.
Use your social media to connect it all. If you consistently and uniquely engage your fan base and potential
fan base on the Internet, in person and everywhere in-between, they become walking promoters for that band
that you gotta check out (yours).

When you want to succeed as much as you want to

breathe, then you will be successful.
- Eric Thomas
 Chapter 1 | SUCCESS 9

In Case of Panic Attack,

Breathe into bag
Kylee Swenson Gordon
I have a hard time taking my own advice on this, but it’s important to remember the
high you feel from the wins (e.g. playing a music festival) and do your best to forget
the losses (some dis from a blogger). In fact, most people won’t even pay attention,
but for you — the unfortunate target — it’s easy to sulk, let it fester and lose sleep
over it. Like a board game that sends you two spaces forward, five spaces back, seven
spaces forward and then straight to jail, you will sometimes wonder if you will ever…
you know…“make it.” But is that the point, or is it that you are creating music that
people appreciate?

During a particularly stressful time, a friend gave me a paper bag with these words
written on it: “In case of panic attack, breathe into bag until you just don’t give a
crap.” I highly recommend doing something stupidly funny that helps take the edge off of the seriousness of
it all. Then the next time something goes wrong — whether it’s your van breaking down in Lemmon, South
Dakota or just something that pokes at your ego — breathe into the bag. And most importantly, don’t quit!

Chaos is a ladder.
– Game of Thrones

If you are going to try – go all the way.

– Charles Bukowski

Every scary thing that you have ever heard about the music business is true. If there is any other work that you would be happy
doing, you should strongly consider going that way. The musician’s life is filled with pitfalls and sketchy characters, who can at least be
entertaining. Worse than that is the mainstream music industry, which is built to a large extent on the near or complete ignorance of
one party in the transaction- the artist.

The many difficulties, and the often limited practical and financial realities tend to select for the obsessed, and those who are in it for
the music and the experience no matter what. Many of us are in it because we can’t not do it. If you’re one of these people, then learn
as much as you can about everything that you can: the history, the structure, the roles, the etiquette, about every art, technology and
science that you run across — and never stop learning.
– Mark Rubel
10 BAND:SMART

why would any sane person subject

themselves to this foolishness?
Greta Brinkman
I sincerely hope that you don’t think you’re going to be making a living selling records, because that’s not
how things work any more. Even when they DID work that way, only a tiny fraction of a percentage of bands
ever broke even, while the rest got anally raped by the record companies and in many cases never recovered.
As I’m writing this, the major labels are in their final death throes, and not a minute too soon if you ask me.
There ARE some labels who are honest and fair with their bands, but the fact is, nobody makes money selling
CDs anymore. Your record, if it’s any good and anybody wants to hear it, will be up on the internet within
milliseconds of you releasing it. The absolute best you can hope for is to make some money on merch when
you play out of town, but you shouldn’t even hope for that. See that Rock ‘n’ Roll Hopes and Dreams™ dial?
Adjust that downward. More. More. The reality is, you’ll be lucky if you break even and your tour doesn’t
actually cost you money out of pocket. If that happens, SUCCESS! You just had a paid-for, working vacation!

I know you want to get your music heard, and I’m not here to advise you about that. If you don’t suck, and
there is a niche for the type of music you’re doing, people will find their way to it sooner or later.

IT’S BOTH TOUGHER AND EASIER NOWADAYS.

Let’s say you’re a moderately good Black Metal band. Thanks to the internet, there are about 8000 other
moderately good BM bands out there from all over the world, all hoping to be heard by the same, say, 10,000
BM fans. How can you stand out? Let’s face it: pretty much everything that can be
done with bass, guitar, keys and drums has already been done, and you’re not likely
to set the music world on fire with your BRAND NEW TOTALLY ORIGINAL
sound. So how can you get the word out? A: by being good (you’re on your own with
that, sorry), and B: by playing live. You’re going to have to start from the ground
up, and no whining. Just because you’ve been practicing for years and put college
on hold doesn’t mean anybody owes you jack. See Martin’s other book, Tour:Smart,
for tips on how to tour without bankrupting yourself (hint: routing is important!)

Geez, this sounds discouraging.

Why, then, would anybody be in a band? It’s a lot of time, trouble, expense and
very little monetary reward. For the chicks/dudes? Well, there still is that. For the
adventure? Absolutely. To make new friends and see places you would never normally
go? Definitely. And how about, it brings you joy to be making music with your friends,
and performing music for your other friends, and it’s nice to be part of a scene where
you all like the same things, and you can talk to somebody who UNDERSTANDS
about Earth guitar heads or diminished 7ths or why John Bonham is still a god.
 Chapter 1 | SUCCESS 11

Inspire Awesomeness
Lance Curran
At Threadless, our mission is to inspire awesomeness. In each other. In our community.
In the world.

I think this is a good motto for any band. You need to inspire awesomeness in your band,
that will inspire your fans (community), and finally your band and your fans can inspire
awesomeness in the world.

Designs on Threadless are voted on by our community with a score from 0 to 5 and "$"
(meaning "I’d buy it"). When I see or hear a band for the first time I’m applying this
rating system mentally to them as well. What would motivate an audience to give you
a 5 rating or say they would buy your album?

IT’S NOT ALWAYS THE MOST

TALENTED DESIGNER WHO GETS
THE HIGHEST RATING.

Sometimes it’s just witty, clever, or fun and other times it’s just the designer who is able to promote themselves the
best. Where is your band? What if you were all of these?

When I used to manage and do production for shows I saw a lot of bands. I watched amazingly talented
musicians perform to an empty room and I’ve seen the most horrible acts play to a packed house of diehard
fans. You would learn what bands were the most passionate and the most involved with their fans.

TALENT WAS MEANINGLESS. PASSION WAS EVERYTHING. YOUR FANS ARE EVERYTHING.
If you just enjoy playing music and don’t really care about a career or being successful then why the hell are
you reading this book? The fact that you’re curious and passionate enough to pick up Band:Smart shows you
have a spark that with the right fuel could become a raging rockstar.

Being in a band is a lifestyle. It’s you. It can be extremely hard and frustrating but if you call it work then do something
else that makes you happy because you’re not cut out for it. You do it because it’s you and you have no choice.

The situationist Guy Debord’s first book Mémoires was bound with sandpaper so it would destroy all other
books next to it on the shelf. Inspiring awesomeness. Guy Debord was later quoted as saying, “I have
written much less than most people who write; but I have drunk much more than most people who drink.”
Eventually the drink killed him. Not so awesome but the dude was passionate about drinking.

But what do I know? Go have fun. That’s all the matters anyway.
12 BAND:SMART

deconstruction
Casey Rain [S-Endz]
I’d be lying to you if I said that I hadn’t trashed a hotel room before, or abused
the minibar, or ran up enormous phone bills from the hotel room (in that
last case, I honestly thought MTV was paying for it.......they weren’t). The
point is, unless you’re Metallica, you’d be an idiot to do any of these things on
a regular basis. And I’m guessing you aren’t Metallica (If you are, what’s up
guys?). When I say a regular basis, I mean more than once. And even then you
should probably know better, because you’ve read this.

Somebody will always have to pay for any damage you cause, and it’ll
probably be you, or your label (who will start to dislike you, which is a path
that leads to you getting dropped), or your management (who will start to
dislike you, which is a path that leads to you getting dropped). Even if none
of those people end up footing the bill, don’t count on getting booked by that
promoter, asked to appear on that show, etc. ever again.

It’s simply a question of being aware how others might see you and the impression you leave with these
people.

FIRST IMPRESSIONS LAST A WHOLE LOT LONGER THAN YOU MIGHT THINK.

There are going to be times when you will get dangerously

close to losing your mind, lighting the rehearsal space on fire,
running off screaming and pulling your hair out in chunks.
- Kylee Swenson Gordon

Those who succeed have talent, skills

and endurance...
- Bob Tulipan

There is no deodorant like success.

– Rod Steiger
 Chapter 1 | SUCCESS 13

3 simple rules to ‘making it’

david lewis
Too many artists these days are all to eager for the trappings of success with very
little understanding of the importance of earning their spot. Many bands will look to
the team around someone successful and think I just need their – manager, publicist,
booking agent, or girlfriend – not realizing the hard work.

Having Fall Out Boy’s manager does not make you Fall Out Boy, or, Coldplay, or even
Creed. Right? You might talk a ton of smack about any of those bands, but each of
which has likely done more work than you can even imagine. That doesn’t make them
good, but it does make them deserving.

Here are three simple rules that if you follow – and get lucky – will lead to your best
shot at making it.

1 PAY YOUR DUES. I have had students, interns, and total strangers tell me they are
tired of hearing about “paying their dues”. When I was young and dumb I actually
thought it sounded romantic to sleep on floors, eat nothing but ramen noodles and
travel the world. Maybe today’s young people are brighter than I was, but that doesn’t change the fact that
you shouldn’t get into this business for the quick buck. Many music business professionals make a fraction of
what their real world counterparts might and at a much-delayed climb to the top.

If by the time you are 30, you still care about music, then by default you will probably make more money than all
the 20-year-olds trying to break-in to the business. Same goes for 40-year-olds. I know a few 50-year-olds still
trying to make sense of the music world. They have families. They make decent money. They looked tired. They’ve
paid their dues and now they sign your paychecks. Do you think they want to hear about how exhausted you are?

2 SAY THANK YOU. This is not even a music business thing. This is just common sense. The biggest stars I
have met have been some of the most gracious people. If you got into this business for an excuse to be a
jerk then I have some news for you: you can be a jerk now, you don’t need a guitar and a record contract.

I will always pay attention when I am out to dinner with a group of people to how my table treats the wait staff.
If you are demanding, self-serving and a pain-in-the-butt that typically means you are a demanding self-serving
pain-in-the-butt. Be respectful of the people around you. Say thank you. Really it is that simple.

3 BE AWESOME, BE INTERESTING. Your talents supercede all this back-and-forth on what makes for
success and what doesn’t. I can only assume you are amazing. That what you are doing is truly ground
breaking and new, that your live set can actually kill people, that you are the best rapping, guitar playing,
line dancing, fake-ipod-dj hybrid the world has ever seen. Beyond that, be respectful and studied. Be new
and interesting. Work hard and say thank you. Be obsessive and controlling but also patient and kind. But
above all be good at what you are doing and follow through. Nobody who has done that has failed and you
won’t either.
14 BAND:SMART

I have gleaned a few other truths out of the black pit of doom that is a musician’s sorry career. Never put the money first and
chose your band-mates wisely. Play worthy benefits for unpopular causes close to your heart and make weird guest appearances
in unlikely venues from time to time even if you don’t get paid. There are karmic rewards.
– Jon Langford

Your drive is the only thing standing between writing songs in your bedroom that no one will ever hear, and headlining Wembley
Stadium. You don’t have to be particularly good to be successful. You can be so driven that your enthusiasm is contagious and
you sell lots of tickets and records. And probably most importantly, your reputation is what will continue to open (or slam shut)
doors for you throughout your career. You’re going to run into the same people again and again. Some will work their way from
street teamer to club owner, so it pays to keep a good name for yourself. You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.
– Casey Orr

You thought you were in the record business, now you realize you’re not. You’re in the fan-relationship management business.
You thought you were an artist and all you had to do was be good. But now being good is not enough because there are 100,000
other artists that are putting out albums every year. So, they’re all good. It’s not enough. You just learned that 81,000 albums sold
under 100 units, so you’re realizing “WTF?” At this point you have to say, “alright, let’s go back to the drawing board.” How can
I work smarter, how can I work better, how can I take the effort and the focus I want to do in a new way.
– Tom Silverman

n until
You don’t get to a millio
you get past ONE.
– Chuck D
 Who?
What?
When?
Where?
Why?

Who?
CHEMISTRY IS UNFATHOMABLE AND
IMPOSSIBLE TO STAGE, DIRECT, OR PLAN FOR. STRENGTH WEAKNESS

Think as though you’re at the beginning of an episode of Mission Impossible, except this is Mission Really
Impossible. Think about the skills that might be needed on the road ahead: vehicle mechanic, computer nut, OPPORTUNITIES THREATS
a bit of muscle here and there, technical ability, organizational skills, a bit of sex appeal, and a golden tongue
for the interviews. Look at your choices as underlining the good points and balancing out your weak points
(you probably do have a few). SWOT (strength, weakness, opportunities, threats) yourself and proceed YOURSELF!
accordingly. If you are terrible at writing lyrics, then look for someone who has a rhyming dictionary. Get

15
16 BAND:SMART

some balance so that you can be totally unbalanced in a deliberate way. Understand that chemistry is
unfathomable and impossible to stage, direct, or plan for. There is a tipping point on every single equation
we examine. There isn’t a recipe for this stuff. Okay, well there kind of is. Sometimes it’s some of the same
ingredients put together in a different order, half-baked, or sometimes crispy round the edges.

CHOOSING THE WRONG PEOPLE TO BE IN A BAND WITH.

It’s not all about choosing the safest, most punctual, polite, tidiest band members with the best credit ratings
and cleanest driving record. Those qualities don’t make up a band that draws fans to the venue, do they?
There’s no risk, no danger, nor anything to compel fans to watch. I recently bought a shabby louvered door
for my boys’ room. I stripped it back, got rid of all of the caked-on flakiness from 50 years of built up paint.
Hours later, I stood back to admire my work. I was patting myself on the back for a job well done when...
the door crumbled and fell apart. It turned out that it was being held together by all of the flaky paint. Moral
of the story — sometimes you need a bit of flakiness and not some stripper!

CHOOSE the drummer that shows up. Then, if you are struggling between two — choose the one with
the smallest kit who doesn’t want to change drum heads every day (ask them!) or the one that hears you
when you ask if they can play a little quieter.

CHOOSE the bass player with the van and the rehearsal space she built with the proceeds from the car
accident settlement — unless she is awful and can’t play bass. Then think about going all Human League
and having her stand behind a keyboard with dark glasses and a sequencer.

CHOOSE the guitarist that has several cup holders already built into his equipment along with ashtrays
and several cigarette lighters Velcro-ed to his amp along with a blender. This is the mark of a true
professional — you are in the presence of greatness.

CHOOSE wisely, surprisingly, and understand the consequences — one of them being that if you follow
all of the rules of business and just choose two other people to be in your band based upon their assets
instead of choosing the five nut jobs you really want to be in a band with then you might be screwed
before you start. But you’ll have a hell of a time not getting there.

GET SOME BALANCE SO THAT YOU CAN BE TOTALLY

UNBALANCED IN A DELIBERATE WAY.
Don’t be in a hurry to put a band together. Explore yourself first.

Think of this as war, because it is! Eventually, when you tour, it’s much better to be one person going into
unknown territory. If a venue or city is wrong, it’s just you and the voices in your head you need to explain
to, not some drummer on $100 a day complaining about the lack of beer or a hotel. You can perform
on the streets anywhere without a debate. That means more fans, more accidental encounters, a larger
network. The third, fourth or fifth time you go back to a city, then you can add a couple of additional
musicians, and the show will seem like you added fireworks!

Mick was not the most punctual guy, but looking back, I believe talent is worth waiting for...
– Joe Strummer (admitting it was a mistake to fire Mick Jones of the Clash)
 Chapter 2 | WHO? WHAT? WHEN? WHERE? WHY? 17

Make the difficult choice. Stretch yourself. The resolution of these difficulties will make you more
interesting and people like fireworks.

Done the other way around, too ambitious and costly with too many people on the front end when you
make the financially dictated change back to a solo performer, it’s theatrically a step backwards, sonically
undermined and looking like a budgetary cut-back, which is exactly what it’ll be.

When it’s just you, you can stay with anyone!

I spoke to an artist in Ann Arbor. She plays guitar, sings, writes all her own songs, and it seems people
really like what she does. Now she is waiting to put a band together to go out and do some shows. All of
her questions for me involved how she should go about dealing with a drummer that has a busy schedule
and problems involving other musicians. It seemed to me like a bucketful of ice-cold limitations, thrown
down the pants of her very nice little manageable situation. I advised her to immediately start DOING
IT SOLO. Incrementally start to build a fan base/a larger audience. This is essential leverage when trying
to put a band together to do your songs (not theirs initially): you are now the DEALER of the drug...
groovyness and providing audiences larger than ZERO. This is more powerful than money in your
negotiations with hired musicians.

The more you perform solo the more likely candidates for your new band you will meet.

And, as we all know,

THERE’S NOTHING BETTER THAN PLAYING WITH YOURSELF.

THINK before you start a band with 9 members. It’s going to sound amazing and look amazing, until
you have to feed everyone! Any club owner is going to run screaming from giving you a shot at a first gig.
You can try saying you only want pizza and beer, but how many pizzas is that? More than the DJ gets.
Your chances of crashing at someone’s apartment are severely limited. Anyone cool enough to let you stay
is unlikely to have the room to accommodate 9 of you.

You can put a bunch of great

players in a room — that doesn’t
make a band — it's chemistry.
– Kevin Lyman
18 BAND:SMART

Consequence of people
 Chapter 2 | WHO? WHAT? WHEN? WHERE? WHY? 19

PERSONALITY CHOICES OF A BAND...

The first rule of starting a band should be that you start it to have fun. Having fun usually involves people who get along
together and grow together into a band. After a while if someone is not growing with the band musically or does not fit
in socially you have to know when to make a change. When you are great and successful it is sadly expected that you will
all hate each other’s guts (only partly joking there). Bands like the Chili Peppers do it right... they get together for three
years and work hard and then take a break from each other and pursue other interests for a couple years. Then they set up
in a garage and see if they can still play together as friends before they do a new album. Sadly, I think many bands don’t
do that and stay together for the money. I have seen it with many bands and can’t figure out why they do it, maybe the
managers and agents have big mortgages and convince them to do it for the money.
– Kevin Lyman

More Than One

lee jarvis
Part of working smart is knowing when to delegate: you can spend 50 hours learning
Photoshop, it is a great tool, but if you know a fan who is already an expert then
get them to do it, send them a t-shirt, and you can spend 50 hours practicing your
instrument or writing new material. And how about someone better looking than you
collecting emails at gigs, in return for a couple of beers?

The best thing about being in a multi-person band is that you can all assist in this.

YOU SHOULD NOT HAVE ONE PERSON SLAVING AWAY,

BUT THE SYNERGY OF SEVERAL PEOPLE WORKING TOGETHER.
One member may be good at social media promotion — let them do that; one may
be really talkative and charming — let them meet the press/venue staff/radio hosts;
one may be a raging, drug-fueled, sex-crazed psychopath, but man are they a whiz at
making websites — let them do that. The one who is great at managing people —
they’ll have to manage the web design psychopath.

EVERY BAND SHOULD HAVE A RAGING, DRUG-FUELED, SEX-CRAZED PSYCHOPATH.

20 BAND:SMART

IT’S ALL ABOUT THE MULTI-TASK KING!

Ryan Lykken
 Chapter 2 | WHO? WHAT? WHEN? WHERE? WHY? 21

You will be more able to barter skills when you actually have some! When the owner of a studio has a
fire, loses an aquarium, a website, needs to redo the wallpaper, and restock the fish... you can provide that
service in return for recording time.

Perhaps the biggest skill of all is the realizing that we are all just human beings and that rolling up your
sleeves and helping, be it changing the oil, helping someone move, or just being there without question
is what really matters. Being next to someone that is calming in a crisis can ignite a solution and prevent
a compounding the problem. Learn to do that by experience. Take the Valerian route.

PRACTICAL ARTISTIC
• Recording • Metalwork/Staging
• People Skills/Counseling • Art/Graphics
(Waiter, Interpreter, etc.) • Screen Printing
• IT/Software/Networking • Tattoo Artist
• Social Media • Web Design
• Music Technology • Graffitti
• Electronics • Hairstylist
• First Aid • Videographer/Drone Operator
• Accounting • App Development
• Instrument Repair/Creation • Songwriting (now there’s one!)
• Basic Vehicle Maintenance • Interior designer
• Language/Sign Language • Acting – stand up and speak!
• Aquarium management • Sewing
• Basic Construction/Carpentry
• Baby/Animal/House Sitter
• Cleaner/Organizer

SPIRITUAL SPECIAL/COOL PARTY TRICKS

• Self Defense • Cooking
• Mediation • Balloon Bender
• Yoga • Juggler
• Meditation • X-Box Hacking

Learn another language... additional skills make a

difference and create opportunity. Sign language
experts get $30+ an hour!

Learn to sing: ‘Guitarist wanted, must have good BV’s.’ How many times have you see this
ad? This can give you the edge over the competition when it comes to audition time.
– Jim Clark
22 BAND:SMART

day jobs
The day gig is essential. It seems that the “day job,” the ditching of, the continuation of, the presence of, is some kind of
– Wayne Kramer yardstick that artists use as a gauge to their level of success. It's the universal put down response...
"How did we do?!" "Don’t give up your day job."

Actually, it’s well worth dealing with the problems that day jobs can create. Without any other sources
of income you will quickly be in all kinds of trouble – losing the path that you decided to set out on
I kinda feel like having
and losing your ability to do it your way. You will end up doing too many local shows because you need
a job is great, and
the money, the free beer and the high! Nowhere ever in the history of the world have I come across a
being in a band as a
situation with a band with (say) six members that has a strategy to take over the world, but first, they all
side project is great
get two jobs and put $100 bucks a week each into their “make or break” fund. Wow, that’s ANARCHY.
and not any kind of a
How sad is it when strategies like saving and planning feel weird to even type?……Naaaa, only joking!
compromise at all.
What you need is DRUGS baby, drugs!
– Steve Albini
Once again, it is time for some heavy application of the D.T.O. (See Strategy). Wait as long as possible
to give up your day job. I say jokingly when I’m talking about the “flower petal plan” for touring to
return home just in time to fall asleep at your desk on Monday morning. That is exactly what you need
to do. Pushing everything: yourself, your physical limits, your mental capacity for stress and dealing
with people, your bank account, your relationships, and your day job as far as you can. One written
warning is serious, but it ain’t two.

balancing act
micah solomon
If you need to keep your day job for the time being you’re in good company; most people
in the performing arts seek supplementary employment for at least part of their career.
(One of my favorite examples: perhaps the greatest classical composer of the early 20th
century, Charles Ives, continued to remain fully employed in the insurance field for most
of his career. Dissonances, he reasoned, were not a reliable way to feed a family.)

Working a daytime gig may take some spring out of your step, but it can also provide key
benefits like health coverage (don’t hit the road without it!) Then again, supplemental
employment is no excuse for treating your music like a hobby. To make it big in music
you’ll need to run your career like a real business – beginning now. Run your part-time
business just as professionally as a full-timer would.

Keep your day job while you play and

build a fan base. Keep working until
your filled up schedule gets you fired.
 Chapter 2 | WHO? WHAT? WHEN? WHERE? WHY? 23

Best day job whilst being in a band?

I know players who have bailed hay, dug ditches, lots of construction, house painters, set designers,
teachers, pizza delivery guys, graphic designers, dog walkers, and many just date strippers that have cash.
- Torch Torcherie

I work in a vintage shop, 11am-6pm. We also practice in the back of the shop, and the owner is our
biggest fan. I can get all the time off I need, and extra hours when the times get tough.
- Jay Godin

Develop your songwriting skills enough to not only write for your band, but others too. Contributing to
a few songs that become even minor hits will pay your rent for a while! Also, web and graphic design is
good because it’s flexible and can be done anywhere!
- S-Endz

I work at an auction house. The people are cool and the owner supports what I do. I get the time off I
need. That’s pretty much the best day job I could possibly ever ask for, plus, I get to take pictures and see
a bunch of crazy stuff all day long!
- Jon Allegretto

To pay the bills, try registering with NARMS (not to be confused with NARM!). NARMS is a nationwide
merchandising clearinghouse for manufacturers who need grocery/hardware store/etc merchandising —
a middle person so to speak — pick your hours, pick your products, paid mileage, good hourly pay (avg.
$20 per hour). If you’ve worked in a record store and know how to merchandise and set-up displays this
is a perfect gig to be your own contractor and make great $ on your terms and time. Visit narms.com
- Nora Hayes Eldredge

Phone sex operator.

- Alana Waters-Piper

Being a graphic designer and artist has been the best day or anytime of the day job for me while being in a
band. I can choose my own hours and best of all I don’t have to hire anyone to do the band's design work.
Think about the new
- Layla Reyna era of pick-up gigs
TaskRabbit, Fiverr,
Being a Musical Instrument Repair Tech kept me always meeting the new players that came to town. It
Uber, Lyft...
also made me a hero and a go-to guy for regional and national level players. It kept me surrounded by
musicians even when I was not playing.
- Christo Ruppenthal

Silkscreening.
- El Jeffe Klukowski

I don’t see it as a lack of commitment to not try to make a living off of it. I see it like totally converse to that. I think of music as
something that I’m willing to work 40 hours a week or more to support, like a wife and family, right? Music to me is that important. It’s
so important that I don’t expect it to make a living for me. I expect that I will have to work a normal, regular job like a regular person
in order to have the luxury of being able to play music.
- Steve Albini
24 BAND:SMART

why bands break up

The great thing about buying a car these days is that there is so much (SOOO MUCH!) information
about every single version of every single model. NOTHING is left to chance except whether or not you
read the right blogs, consumer reports and remember to get your CARFAX history report. A five second
Google search tells us the 2001 Honda Civic is by far the model most plagued with problems. How many
oil changes occurred during the car’s lifetime, how many windshield wiper blades have been replaced (front
and rear), and how much sex has been had in the seat (front and rear). There is no website, blog, book,
YouTube video, or directory where you can gauge the likelihood of how prone a middle aged bass player
is to alcoholic tendencies or a predication for drugs or underage girls? No consumer report that warns us
Do it because you about THE REASONS BANDS BREAK UP.
love it.
This might seem like a rant, but it isn't! It's the result of a lot of research and some social media help.
– Butch Vig

A NEVER ENDING LIST OF REASONS WHY BANDS BREAK UP:

Growing pains, money, sex, moderate success, too much practice, someone stole someone’s girlfriend,
too little practice, someone stole someone’s boyfriend, one show went horribly wrong, egos, sex, creative
control, a sandwich, drugs, sex, being beaten in a battle of the bands by a bunch of pretty boys, not
enough gigs, sex, drugs, money, the business model sucked, the producer, growing pains, two words:
Day Job, contracts, the lead singer found God, our manager ripped us off, the lead singer died, unable to
follow up on an amazing album, drugs, the vehicle, drummers, everyone thinks that they are the leader,
the label, unrealistic expectations, stagnation, sex, the guitar player let his girlfriend sing, legal issues,
drugs, alcohol, girlfriends, money, money it's always money, the lack of a spoon for a tub of yogurt,
creative differences, sex, our agent sucked, sex, sex, drugs.

We didn’t break up. We just lost our way.

- Mercy Victor

Some people want to be in bands because they think it will allow them a life of laziness and total unaccountability. Such
people are poisonous to bands.
- David Israel Dabbs

My band broke up because the drummer got a job mowing lawns and the bassist wanted to move back home with his
parents... so I got drunk and chased him out of the house with a large butchers knife.
- Elvis Azard

You don’t have to be a large band to have all of the same problems with addiction, personality differences, family issues or
any other reasons for a group of people to become disfunctional and split up. Choose wisely whom you sign on with.
- Chris Pentecost

The singer went to Iceland. :P

- Joel Gausten
 Chapter 2 | WHO? WHAT? WHEN? WHERE? WHY? 25

forming your own band

anders odden
THE ART OF WAR.
To make sure you are ready to face the enemy, you have to gather the right members to join
your army. A perfect band has to include the following elements:

• A star
• A brain
• A joker

No band out there is even possible without 1 guy to be its face. It has to have the front man
that gets the attention for people to even bother. You can shoe gaze as much as you want or
make a one-man army playing ambient music, but if you want to have a truly successful band it has to have the
something extra to stick in the short term memory of the audience. No one goes to a show only to hear and see
a great guitar player with a bad singer or weak front man.

This star will never shine unless someone else in the band is the brain to make the whole operation functional.
The guy in the back who always had some money to cover everybodys' butts, the rehearsal space, the car, etc.
This guy is in fact the band’s manager until you get someone else to be your manager, but that happens a
long time after you have something somebody ELSE can make money of off. Good managers do not grow
on trees, and the ones who come down from a tree and tell you they can make you a star, well...

KNOW YOUR STRENGTHS AND WEAKNESSES.

The brain must learn fast and network with all the other people you need to do stuff for you. He also needs
to set a game plan for the band and make a strategy. Like a general who plans for war you have to know your
strengths and weaknesses. No army is going to win a war if they do not have a plan. The most important
thing about a plan is to actually follow it. If you learn how to do this and also plan for version A, B, C, D etc
of the plan, then you are set to go.

A band also needs a joker. Someone to take the heat down and make the life of the band a much more calm and
relaxed place. If you are TOO serious in this game — you lose. Go watch Spinal Tap. It is the truth. Everyone
in a band will know that the jokes are real and that it’s so accurate and to the point that it’s ridiculous.

The joker must not become a REAL scapegoat. If so, you have pushed it too far and that will break your
band up at the end of the day. You started playing music because it was fun, right? Keep the fun in there at
all times. Especially if you DO get successful.

For more on personalities, check out

Joanna Weber's piece later. It's got great
illustrations, too!
26 BAND:SMART

Choosing a singer
As the singer enters the room, listen for a while to the anecdotes of days gone by or days yet to come.
Marvel as he or she weaves a tapestry of brilliant threads, joining words that were never before joined,
into songs that were never before sung. Look at the words as they appear to sparkle and dance in front of
your eyes. Then, punch the singer in the throat. I don’t mean really hard — not as hard as you might want
to knee him in the nuts, but hard enough.

WHY?
I’ve been looking at simple things you can do to better your chances of gaining popularity without
breaking, snapping, and then setting fire to the bank account and your partner’s credit score. One of these
things is to perform at least 7 days a week instead of 4 or 5. It’s the EASIEST way to make more of the
difficult REAL equations work. In fact, if you are a band gigging to 100-150 people on an o.k. night, then
allowing for some extra t-shirt sales and a few more CDs, less hotels, more tips, more door money, more
food, over the course of 40 weeks of gigging will put an extra 75k in your pocket — $75k o.k.!?

Because of the harsh reality of budgets, a day off is a luxury for the singer. The budget simply won’t
support it. In every week on the road there are seven days when people need to eat, sleep, and get paid.
You need to offset this with seven days worth of income, pizza, contacts, vibe, t-shirt sales and groovyness.

Allowing for the fact that in any larger city there are hundreds of bands, there are going to be hundreds
of singers in any city and, assuming that 6 out of the 10 applicants are pretty good and not too insane,
then that’s my advice: punch each one in the throat. You HAVE to make sure that they can deal with the
throat stress that touring these days is going to rain down on them.

No sooner had I written this than I started to look at some emails from indie record stores across the country.
Many of them have started to advertise early intimate/acoustic performances from bands performing at the
larger venues. So, HELL, that means another gig for your dulcet-toned singer. See what I mean? This started
off to be a fun afternoon assaulting singers and now it’s turned into some really good advice. You NEED
someone fronting your band who can sing 7 full shows a week, hit a few acoustic afternoon shows, early
acoustic lounge type radio shows, and do 10 interviews a DAY, without losing his or her voice (or mind!).

Check out vocalist tips later in the book.

A day off is a luxury

for the singer.
 Chapter 2 | WHO? WHAT? WHEN? WHERE? WHY? 27

auditioning
alessandro quargnali-linsley
AUDITION PREP
Your want-ads need to follow the same principles as everything else you do: know your
market and tailor your message. You want to get high caliber musicians, and they are as
frustrated by the amateurs and wannabes as you are. Be direct, to the point, and don’t
bother with building yourself up or belittling your competition. If you’re gigging, state it.
If you’re touring, state that. If you’re tired of answering ads from idiots, don’t say that; just
set your tone higher and ask for demos. This isn’t a personal ad, it’s a business solicitation.

Set up two nights a week for auditions; include that information in your ad. Pick a
song or two from your set and get these somewhere you can get copies to the prospects.
Online methods should be an obvious choice. The tracks you pick to audition with should be typical of your
music and should highlight the needs of the position you’re filling. It should be something the rest of the
band is extremely tight on. You want everyone to be able to spend 80% of their attention on the new guy, not
worrying about remembering their chart.

When someone calls, pre-screen them: what’s their experience? What are they looking for? If you’re in it for
the big return, the guy who just wants to have some fun on the weekends will never work, even if he’s perfect
in every other regard. It’s not worth wasting either of your time even for an audition. As much as their actual
answers are important, pay attention to their vibe — if their words are good but they seem like an idiot, trust
your gut. Similarly, a newbie who seems cool might be worth a shot — we all start someplace. Depending on
the current market, response, etc, you might ask for a demo to vet and then get back to them.

AUDITION TIME
Just as you need to play to the top of your game, place that same expectation on people auditioning for
you. This is one of those places where you can set the expectations. If they don’t have the ability to easily
download a demo track from you then they have a serious gap in their professional skills. If they don’t have
a car, missing gear, need to borrow gas money... do I need to say it?

Auditions are like interviews. You can be laid back, but don’t forget what you’re all there for. The audition
should give you a sense of what the new person is capable of, how seriously he or she prepped their material
before hand, how willing they are to actually rehearse. Assuming that they don’t perfectly nail the tunes on
the first go-around, go back and work sections like you would at a rehearsal. That’ll let you see their learning
process, how quickly they pick up something new, or whether you can communicate effectively.

Depending on your band and its genre, other auditioning tools are free jams - which let the auditioner show
their own style without comparison to the departed - and playing through covers that you all know. Of
course, if your band can hack through the Alice in Chains catalog but the new guy’s repetoire is limited to
Front 242, there may be a problem... or maybe not.
28 BAND:SMART

checklist for rock star greatness

GLIB SUPERFICIAL
CHARM
GRANDIOSE
(EXAGGERATEDLY
HIGH) ESTIMATION
OF SELF
NEED FOR
STIMULATION
PATHOLOGICAL LYING
CUNNING AND
MANIPULATIVENESS
POOR BEHAVIORAL
CONTROLS
SEXUAL PROMISCUITY
IRRESPONSIBILITY
CRIMINAL
VERSATILITY

Oh! That’s not rockstar greatness - it’s the

Hare checklist for criminal psychopathy!

Make sure no one in your band has a CRIMINAL RECORD!

It really messes up your chances at international touring!
– Josh White Make sure everyone in yo
ur band
has a criminal record. It
makes the
stories so much more inter
esting!
 Chapter 2 | WHO? WHAT? WHEN? WHERE? WHY? 29

there’s never been a better time

to redefine what a band is
moldover
If I could tell a band one thing, it would be the thing I proved to myself over the last
decade: With technology,

YOU DON’T NECESSARILY NEED A BAND TO

CREATE AN ENGAGING LIVE PERFORMANCE.
Don’t get me wrong — I’ve played in all kinds of bands, and making music with
other people is one of the most satisfying experiences life has to offer. I just want to
point out that this is a unique and exciting point in music history when for the first
time; advanced real-time audio software is finally accessible to all music makers. In
other words, you don’t need an engineering degree to make live electronic music; you
just need a basic computer. Let’s consider some possibilities:

• Your alcoholic drummer could be replaced by a CONTROLLER that

keeps perfect time, does exactly what you tell it, and never whines about not
getting enough drink tickets.

• Your virtuoso bassist hates playing the simple bass lines in your songs, so you
kick him to the curb, set up an OCTAVE DIVIDER and a LOOPER, and play the lines yourself.

• Your drama-queen vocalist is annoying as hell to work with, so you make a new front-man out of a
good turntablist who can SCRATCH VIDEO PROJECTIONS OF FRANK SINATRA USING
TIME-CODE VINYL.

IN THE NAME OF MUSICAL EVOLUTION PLEASE

AT LEAST CHECK OUT SOME NEW POSSIBILITIES.
Ok, maybe you’re committed to traditional Irish folk music and this kind of technology isn’t going to help
you much, but in the name of musical evolution please at least check out some new possibilities. You’ll learn
something, you’ll have a plan-B when band members become major frustrations, and you might discover
something incredibly FUN that you never knew existed.

No mercy. If there’s a weak link in the band then get rid of them ASAP. They may be a friend or relative, but if they’re
holding you back, they gotta go! It might sound harsh, but bands are only as good as their weakest member.
– Jim Clark
30 BAND:SMART

hairycow.name/population_density

65% of the population of North America lives

within a 90 minute flight of Philadelphia.

Where?
There are several factors to consider when examining your location. None of these factors are static in
themselves. This is a great big lava lamp of ever-changing possibilities.

What are the geographical benefits of your location? One big one is that you are already there! Don't
worry if it's a small city. Become the big fish in the small pond first!

GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER IN YOUR OWN TERRIBLE CITY...*

IS YOUR CITY A GOOD BASE?
1. Is it one of the top 100 markets in the US?
2. What about one of the top ten? (This could be a negative.)
3. One of the top 2? (This is a negative.)
4. You lose points for being west of the Minneapolis/Texas line.
5. You lose more points if you are on the west coast. Gas is a dollar more per gallon and the gigs are further.
Sometimes the smaller 6. You lose points for not being a 360 degree hub (i.e. any coastal town only has possibilities in 180 degrees and you
the city, the easier to need 360 degrees of possibilities).
facilitate a scene. 7. How many Starbucks and Whole Foods are in your area? (As a barometer, your music might need a different
one, like #8.)
- Butch Vig

*It doesn't matter where you are. You'll always hate the city you're in.
 Chapter 2 | WHO? WHAT? WHEN? WHERE? WHY? 31

8. How many cool stores in town? Tattoo, art, clothes other?

9. How many music stores?
10. Are there colleges offering music internships and opportunities to record for free?
11. Are there toll roads or bridges close by? In any direction? (Philadelphia and NYC are BAD!)
12. What is the cost of living?
13. What’s the average cost of rehearsal space? Studio time?
14. How many venues, regional and national, are in the
market and within 50 miles? 150 miles?
Also worth considering...
15. What is the proximity to an airport for when that opportunity
• Do you own a vehicle?
knocks?
• Add points for vehicle mileage better than 15 mpg.
16. How often do national bands come to town?
Lose points for vehicle mileage less than 15 mpg.
17. What is the job market like for you (and your bandmates)
• Do you have day jobs?
skillsets?

EMERGING MARKETS
Population and geographical changes in many markets are fluid. There are many businesses moving in order to
find other, cheaper places to operate. This isn’t to make more money, this is to survive! Slowly (but noticeably),
secondary markets have started to have a scene and some major markets are declining or the emphasis is
moving to the suburbs. Boise has grown 2% in the last year, Atlanta 3.3%, Phoenix 4%, just about every city
in Florida is growing… New Orleans, tragically, has shrunk by 22%, Detroit and Buffalo are shrinking too.

As of this writing, Colorado has its highest job growth rate since 2000! (Growth rate! Geddit!) According
to the Denver Post, more than 200 new restaurants debuted around the Denver area in 2013.

The West Coast is booming too with Riverside CA, Seattle WA, San Francisco, CA Portland OR, Los
Angeles CA, San Diego CA, all in the top 10 cities for growth with a million or more workers and of
course North Dakota is in the middle of an oil boom where fast food workers are getting $15 to $20 an
hour at Hardees!

It's not just all of the above that’s fluid — your fan base is, too. DON’T keep doing the same thing. If
your band survives for a decade — reflect, analyze, LOOK at your fans — if they are all married then
think about playing in the suburbs (where they are!) instead of keep playing downtown where you used
to play, where everyone hooked up, got pregnant, married and moved to the suburbs…

PLACES TO AVOID
It seems that most bands want to head to New York City or Los Angeles to prove Use good tools and the internet,
that if they can make it there, they can make it anywhere. Well, maybe. But the cards find out where your fans are and
are stacked against you in both cities. David Byrne said in the Creative Time Reports play there. It’s easier to deal with
(2013) about NYC, "The rich are destroying New York culture... there is no room problems of equipment, staging,
for fresh creative types." People there are less likely to show up to see an unknown or no dressing room than it is
band and you might find yourself playing with seven or more other bands. Put these to be well taken care of, but not
expensive cities on the back burner. You don’t want your catchphrase to be, “We can’t have anyone buy a ticket. (We
make it there; we can’t make it anywhere.” like ReverbNation’s Fan 360,
Google Analytics, The Orchard’s
New York City: “Nobody cares, dude!!!” There are at least 1,200 events per week. Heat Map and YouTube Insight.
Los Angeles: “Dude, what was the question?” There are at least 1,700 events per week. Check out Bandsintown, too!)
Austin, TX: Two weeks before and two weeks after SXSW.
32 BAND:SMART

Someone in your band needs to be involved in the left brain stuff.

- Robert Cronberg

Assemble your band with half an ear on musicianship and two eyes on commitment levels and self sufficiency. A three fingered low
maintenance guitarist you can have a drink with is so much more fun that a neurotic, bread-head virtuoso who asks loads of annoying
questions and never has a battery for his/her pedals.
– Jon Langford

Being in a band is just like being in a relationship, except it’s with 2+ other people, and allegedly you’re not all sleeping together. When it’s good,
you’re all on the same page and supportive of each other, and it’s a beautiful thing. When it’s bad, it’s an endless dysfunctional nightmare.
– Greta Brinkman

Don’t let anyone play for your band that gives you bad vibes. He or she may end up kidnapping your bass player if you’re not careful.
– Joshua Liston

To make that great recording it is important that you’re working with the right people. The chemistry has to be there.
– Reid Hyams

Develop music technology skill sets. This is going to enable you to become an indispensable member of any band. You could become
an integral part of the writing team, take a production role and even become the technical director for the stage show.
– Tristan James
 Chapter 2 | WHO? WHAT? WHEN? WHERE? WHY? 33

When?
There has never been a better time to be in, start, join a band or start a business, not only are all the tools
and information easily accessible, but a culture of entrepreneurship is everywhere. even Quickbooks uses
a band on the road in their ad! The easiest way to give you a flexible guideline as to the right time to jump
is when more things would be compromised, lost, diminished, irretrievably napalmed, by not jumping.
Push it that far and you stand a better chance than if you jump six months early, 12 bi-weekly paychecks
too early, 24 chances to sneak into the stationary cupboard and steal more Sharpies too early, unlimited
piles of free Xeroxing too early. Plus, you need your workmates to come to your shows.

The jump is frightening. It is part of the poetry, the myth, of this crusade. The people who can really
help you are the people who at some point in their lives have made the jump themselves. I’ll try and
help people who have made the jump. I don’t help people who haven’t. It might be the last real barrier
to succeeding. If you believe in yourself enough to jump off the tall building of hope and ambition, then
there are people who will help you. The help you get, the essential blips of energy come not from people
who “really like your music” but from people who genuinely respect your balls, putting everything on the
line for this most important, intangible, abstract, human, chemical, thing. Communication, expression,
collisions, and a journey that holds our attention. What might seem like an overnight, meteoric rise to
someone that isn’t paying that much attention, looks very different to the person who’s watched that
petrified artist ascend to the very top diving board, step by irretrievable step.

In that way the jumper holds so many other people’s hopes, fears and dreams within themselves. It
seems only fitting, then that they should hold three or four beers and a plate of lasagna when they stay
overnight at your house.

There aren’t rules for this stuff. I’m just giving you as much information as I can. I can’t guarantee that
when it looks like the car is going to overturn on top of the baby that you’ll magically have the strength
to lift it up and smile for the CNN iReporters as they capture it all on their smart phones. You don’t know
this stuff until you do it. The world is littered with the bitter remains of those that never tried, and those
who did and wish they never had. The fleeting, rare moments when you see the very best from people,
places and things can more than outweigh the wet-drag weight of ten times more crappy ones.

That is the wildest drug you will ever do.

"FAITH IS TAKING THE FIRST STEP EVEN WHEN YOU DON'T SEE THE STAIRS" Leap before you look.
- MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR. – Richard Branson

Jump off the high dive board

before the pool is full of water.
– Gary Witt

You jump off a cliff and assemble

an aeroplane on the way down.
– Reid Hoffman
34 BAND:SMART

What?
DEMOCRACY OR BENEVOLENT DICTATORSHIP
You might choose the benevolent dictatorship route, but be careful: if you remove the first four letters you
are just one “i” away from being a violent dictator.
DEMOCRACY? OR NOT.
The democratic solution might be time consuming, involve other opinions other than your own and
nurture everyone to feel more invested in the band, it might be the better way to go, unless you are Prince,
the guy from Guns N Roses, anyone from the Eagles, Eddie Van Halen, etc., etc., etc. And, it’s a nice
safety net just in case you’re an idiot with crappy songs and horrible ideas for t-shirts.

When you get a group of musicians together. Sometimes it gels perfectly, but when it
comes to writing, it falls apart. There has to be a leader and everyone thinks they are it. You
have to find out what you’re strongest at and use that potential. Sometimes you strike gold
and all 3, 4 or 5 people can collaborate together and contribute to the writing process. But
that’s rare; it’s usually a core that does the most writing, but you still have to make sure all
the puzzle pieces fit. Just because 1 or 2 people are writing the music doesn’t mean that the
others can’t bring their talents to the table either in the studio or on stage.
- Mike Reidy
 Chapter 2 | WHO? WHAT? WHEN? WHERE? WHY? 35

Every band likes to think of themselves as being a democracy. Unfortunately, this is unrealistic. There is absolutely a pecking
order in most cases, but what defines it? It depends on the band. Who works the hardest? Who contributes the most to the most
amount of things that you are building your success from? Who is grinding the most, day in and day out?

Just because you might be the lead singer and/or the face of the band, don’t think that you are more important than the
drummer or guitarist who might be writing more of the songs, networking and building relationships with more key people,
doing everything in their power to promote the band behind the scenes, maybe even helping to book the shows, set up
the meetings, talk to the video directors, talk to your management every day to form key plans, building your website and
communicating with your fans online, etc, etc, etc, etc. Many lead singers fall into that trap: it’s called “lead singer syndrome.”
Don’t get egotistical and sulk when something doesn’t go your way. Remember - nobody is indispensible, no matter how many
girls in the front row are screaming that they love you. Be objective and put in the graft without being asked, and you’ll find
that your opinions have more worth.
- S-Endz

Pick a Leader
Hillel Frankel
Your band is a business. Equal representation and an equal say for everyone is a wonderful
thing when you are discussing options in your band practice space, or casting a ballot in a
voting booth, but a 4 member band with 4 voices in business is a 4 headed monster. As your
band’s potential lawyer, the last thing I want to hear is 4 different opinions from 4 different
band members. That is a sure warning that your band is not ready for the next step.

Pick a leader for the business side.

He or she can be different than the leader on the music side. Pick the one who can
rationalize with the other band members, the one who can make a decision and then
get things done. Pick the one that people like, not the moody, introspective or angry
one! Pick a leader who can articulate the bands position to the lawyer, to the potential
manager, tour sponsor, investor, or label. What will save your butt from day one is to
designate the band member with some business sense as the business leader.
36 BAND:SMART

Seven deadly sins: things that

will kill a band deader than
fried chicken
Michael Jolkovski

1 ENVY. If you feel threatened that you have a standout frontman, guitarist, songwriter, marketer etc you
will hate them for doing good things. Instead of feeling diminished by their accomplishments, you should
feel augmented. (A little music theory joke there). You should be working hard to match their contribution
rather than hating them for being showoffs.

The opposite of ENVY is GRATITUDE. Be grateful you have people in your band who are more talented,
better-looking, or more organized than you. Their gifts help power the band.

If you need to be the best, the smartest, the funniest, the best-looking, the best dancer, you will be a massive
pain in the butt to work with.

2 RESENTMENT. If you feel taken advantage of, unrewarded, or given the bad end of the stick, this will corrode
you and the band. It is on you to have the ovaries to stick up for yourself – and the maturity to accept that
maybe this is your fair share – and if you want something different, it is on you to make it happen.

It often happens that everyone feels like they are doing the most work. While you are calling around, hustling
up gigs, the web person is spending 20 hours recoding the WordPress theme and the songwriter is pulling his
eyeballs out trying to get the chorus right. This is why it’s a good idea to have the part
of the band meeting where everyone reports in on what they are doing for the band.

The opposite of RESENTMENT is a sense of FAIRNESS.

3 DISHONESTY. Naturally you want people who will tell the truth. It’s most
important to be truthful about areas of disagreement and conflict.

A classic place this causes trouble is in deciding the basic setup of the band. If you
SAY you want to be egalitarian and democratic, but you secretly want to have your
way, you haven’t been honest with yourself or your bandmates. If you think you
should be the philosopher-king of the band, that’s perfectly fine, but it’s on you to
say so. Lots of bands have a visionary leader. Go for it. If you can’t get people to
follow your lead, it’s not an injustice.

If you bring in a song you wrote and the others want to make changes, you have
to be honest about whether you are open to making changes. It is perfectly fine to
insist on being the czar of your own song. If you let others mess with your song and
then get all butt-hurt about it, it means you weren’t really interested in collaborating.
 Chapter 2 | WHO? WHAT? WHEN? WHERE? WHY? 37

If you are only lukewarm in your commitment to the band and you are looking to join another band or go
back to college, don’t act like it’s the only thing in your life.

If you think somebody’s new song sucks or you hate the direction the band is going, find a diplomatic way
of saying that the atonal polka stuff or the new setup with 9 dulcimers and a keytar is not your cup of tea.
Otherwise you will just fume.

4 SLOTH. A wise man said “GTFOOB!” Success goes to those who do the work. Whether it is work in the
practice room, in the rehearsal space, in marketing or in working the day job to pay for gas,

IT’S WORK THAT TRUMPS TALENT, 100 TIMES OUT OF 100.

Often, people fall into a slothful slump when they are demoralized, discouraged, or indecisive. If that’s
happening, you have to address this as a problem (See The Truth About Cats and Dogs by Joanna Weber later
in the book).

Otherwise, you need to decide whether you are willing to do the work involved in making a band succeed. If
not, maybe you’d be happier playing for fun, or being a sideman in someone else’s project, or doing something
easier with your life, like being a surgeon.

5 CONTEMPT/ARROGANCE. If you think the others in your band are beneath you, it will show. And what
on earth are you doing in a band with people you don’t respect? Either admit that this is the best you
can do at the moment AND you need the others, OR go off and be a solo genius. The Unabomber’s shack
is available. If you sneer at other players and other kinds of music, your ears will be closed and you will never
learn or grow. OR perhaps you are a once-in-a-century genius. My money’s on the former.

THE OPPOSITE OF CONTEMPT IS RESPECT.

You will become old and stupid
Any rock stars here? It takes attitude, but attitude will kill you.
and dogs will pee on you.
ARROGANCE IS THE TOXIC SIDE OF THE - Michael Jolkovski

ROCKSTAR/DIVA/PRIMA DONNA ATTITUDE.

If you think the sun shines out of your arse and the world should bow down to you, not only will you make
enemies and burn bridges everywhere you go, you won’t do what you need to do to succeed.

It’s easy to confuse arrogance with confidence, and to think you need to pose like a rockstar to be taken
seriously. Most of the time, arrogance is a brittle mask used by people who are generally terrified. You can
intimidate people for five minutes by being arrogant, but nobody respects it.

The opposite of arrogance is humility: this is what it takes to admit you need others, that you need to listen to
constructive criticism, you need to get a teacher and practice hard, you need to tear up the first five versions
of your new song, you need to work on your moves, you need to build an audience and persist when people
talk through your set, you need to relentlessly improve, and you need to ask people nicely to listen to your
music and thank them when they like it. “I need your help” are magic words. Humility allows you to learn
from everybody.
38 BAND:SMART

6 DISCOURAGEMENT. It is a discouraging business – especially if you are trying to do creative and new
music, there will be times when it seems like it’s all derivative tripe. There will be times when it all seems
like a pointless waste of time.

This is normal. But if the band overall stays in a discouraged state of mind, people will start missing practice
and having time conflicts with gigs, and your band will just poop out. You need to recognize discouragement
and attack it. Your morale is job one – if you stay discouraged, you won’t do the things it will take. Since I
don’t know you, I don’t know what will help. Maybe playing out more, maybe going for some easy wins like
cover gigs. But you have to square up to discouragement and disappointment as an ordinary problem that
has to be fixed.

7 INDECISION & DISORGANIZATION. Many times, creative people resist too much organization, because
they don’t like to be hemmed in. But it’s a career-killer to change your mind too often, especially with
respect to the big-picture artistic and business decisions. Ariel Hyatt points out that, while you might be
intuitive about your art, you need to be rational and analytic about your approach to building an audience.

What kind of band are you? What style? What kind of audience? How are you going to present yourself to
the public? What’s your general strategy? What’s your band name, logo, URL, social networking presence?
Where is the community you want to reach? How will people know you exist?

If you change these things too often, you will confuse your audience and waste your energy and thrash
around aimlessly.

It is easy to do this, because it is incredibly hard to have confidence that a specific approach is going to work.
If you have decided to cold-call all of the Polish Catholic churches in your area to get gigs for your polka
band, you can’t just drop it after three weeks and try to get booked into country & western bars. Unless you
want to fail.

You can’t go great-guns into a Twitter campaign and then lose interest. You will definitely find your confidence
falter, because nothing will create a sudden flood of gigs. But if you are tweeting like crazy and then stop,
people will assume the band has gone dormant.

There will be times when

it all seems
like a pointless waste of
time.
 Chapter 2 | WHO? WHAT? WHEN? WHERE? WHY? 39

You should know exactly who gets what percentage of royalties from your album and the individual
songs. If a band member leaves the band, they will want their fair share for what they’ve done on
the album. If you don’t have a contract and clear understanding of how everything is split, you can
run into legal problems. You’ll spend thousands on recording but not a couple hundred dollars
on an entertainment lawyer? It’s best to work this stuff out when feelings are all happy between
band members.
- Chris Seth Jackson

I think one issue that comes up again and again, band-wise, is the partnership thing and throwing-
people-out thing. If bands would just think about it before they do things, it would help.
– Evan Cohen Manifesto
40 BAND:SMART
 Band Names

Ok, now you have carefully put your band together. What is it called? This is the subject of many hours and six packs
of band meetings, political maneuvering, and “I asked everyone at the record store and they all like___________” (fill in
the blanks), there’s a name Phil N the Blanks (arghhhhh). I think I have that on a flyer somewhere — sounds very punk.

Crazy band names are taken as evidence of the acceptability of anything as a band name. Their familiarity (because of
success) doesn’t mean it’s a hard and fast rule that the most insane name is going to be a winner.

Englebert Humperdinck… I rest my case. But without the ridiculous name, you might never have heard of him?
He changed his name after manager, Gordon Mills, convinced him that it would be a beneficial career move. Tom
Woodward changed his name to “Tom Jones.” Ice Cube was originally O’Shea Jackson.

The name of your band should work (along broad lines) within the genre of your music. It is, after all, is a chance to
reinforce the image of your brand. “Pastel Lilac and the Sweet Smelling Daisies” is a misleading name for a black metal

41
42 BAND:SMART

band. “The Blowjobs” might be inappropriate for a classical ensemble. However, either of these could
lead to a great punch up at the heavy metal club or the church. So, actually, scratch that last paragraph
— these are great names! Weigh the value of the hilarious ad in the local paper versus a lifetime of being
in Bare Naked Ladies.

Don’t name a band after an ex-girlfriend (Kelly Is A Slut) or you will be forever linked to the skank that
ran off with the bass player from your arch rivals, The Arch Rivals. And, when you become really famous,
she will write a book or release an album, do loads of interviews, and release that photograph.

If all else fails, then sit and reset Rock Band and take a name from their random band name generator.
In fact, there’s another band name: “Random Band Name Generator!”

BE CAREFUL OF A MASSIVE DESIRE TO USE PROFANITY IN THE NAME.

Be careful about aligning your band with a specific country. Although you are catering to a niche market,
you might be alienating the other 98% of the world.

Never align your band with an organization or instrument of governmental control or oppression.

Have the band name reflect the genre and the band accurately. If you are a trio, you aren’t (really) a Dixie
land jazz band. Take the Scotland Yard Gospel Choir, for example. They are, of course, a five piece indie
rock band from Chicago!

Smart creative people can sometimes go one click too far when naming anything. We had fun thinking
about names for a new project in the early 90’s, deciding to call ourselves SH*T! — purely so that, if a
journalist said ‘this band is crap” we could say, “NO! — We’re SH*T!” As evidence of Murphy’s law and
a bunch of other stuff — to AVOID any trouble because of the name — we decided to call the band:
Murder Inc – then paid a lot of money to search the trademark, etc — yes, I’m sure you are thinking,
“Hang on! There is an artist (and a label) called Murder Inc!?” Yes, there is. Take this as evidence that a
legal document isn’t all you need to protect your rights. Sometimes, just like a pickup game of baseball…
someone needs a bat.

You need the paper, the means and the intent.

So I guess my point is, other than checking the availability of the name itself, and the domains, do your
worst!

Of course sprinkle everything with a fast dissolving packet of Murphy’s Law! You never know how the
planets will align to screw up your most careful strategic choice. How did Anthrax feel when everyone
was being poisoned? That can really screw with your Twitter feed!

Read more in Working

with Brands.
THINK OF A BAND NAME THAT HASN’T BEEN USED
Yeah, forget it — this is impossible. It’s a pain in the butt and a threat of
a lawsuit when you find out that the band members are 10, so you were a
little bit nasty and threatening — but their mom is an attorney (of course
she is! [true story]) so deal with it — and look forward to getting the final
sign offs on the name at great expense two days after the band breaks
up (true.).
 Chapter 3 | BAND NAMES 43

Trademark Your Name

Hillel Frankel
What about the band from LA that signed a big indie deal only to find that a much
smaller band in Ohio had already filed for trademark and was using their band name?
They had to spend 90% of their first album advance and recording budget to buy
the rights to use their own name from that little band in Ohio. What about the
Chicago rapper Common Sense who had to change his name to Common because of
a California reggae band named Common Sense, even though the rapper had already
released a highly acclaimed album. Own your name from the outset! Same principal
as stated above with regard to copyrights: the first to file and register the trademark
with the US Patent and Trademark Office is presumed to be the original owner of the
trademark and disproving this ownership can be very expensive. Plus you get to use the little ™ and the little ®
when it is registered. Very cool! I would recommend hiring a lawyer for the trademark process. It is not too
expensive and if you mess up the actual filing, you will lose your $325 in USPTO government filing fee (note
- $325 per classification for a performing group, 2 classifications at $650 if you want to register the mark for
merchandise or 3 classifications at $925 if you want to be a label under the same name as well) and more
importantly, you lose your original filing date.

Case STudy: Lauren Alectrona of Alectrona

L.A.: The problem is our band name “Alectrona.” EVERYONE calls us “Alectronica.” We go on mini-tours with bands and
they say, “Thanks to ALECTRONICA for opening for us!” Venues say it wrong. It’s misspelled on flyers, etc… it’s soooooo hard
to find another name. What should I do?
M.A.: I’d do a shirt that says, “THERES NO I.C. IN THIS BAND” then have some idiot introduce you and get your name
wrong. Run out onto the stage and beat him up with a trash can lid and a hammer... then, exhausted... lean over to the mic, wipe
the blood out of your hair and say... “It’s alectrona....alectrona...” THEN, print the photos everywhere, then write a song about
it... then at the vinyl release party... have someone introduce you as Alex Stronberg and then just shoot him, go to jail, die in the
electric chair then sell millions of records... then Jason Pettigrew can write, “the band was crap, but that girl Lauren was a ...”
Kerrrchiiing!!! That's just what I’d do....
L.A.: -Update- It’s working! We made a t-shirt and put an echoing voice saying “Alectrona” in some of the backing tracks for our
songs. So far no one has said our name wrong in months! *high five* Thank you so much!
44 BAND:SMART

seo: how to choose a name so you

will be found online
chris bolton
Choosing a band or artist name that is search engine optimized can help your career
down the road.

Yes, many bands have managed to achieve success in spite of unsearchable band names
(the band Girls come to mind), but why not make it easy on your fans and choose a
name that is easy to search for and find?

Many musicians have discovered (the hard way) that an unsearchable band name can
hurt sales, reduce concert attendance, and frustrate fans.

And it’s not just major search engines like Google and Bing that you should be
concerned about. A poorly chosen band name can make it hard for fans to find your
music on iTunes, your videos on YouTube, and your band profiles on social networks.

SEO DON’TS
DON’T USE COMMON NAMES, WORDS OR PHRASES. Common names and phrases
are often searched for. So it’s difficult to place at the top of search results for these
terms. Avoid band names like Blue, Harmony, Hot and Cold, or El Nino. These sorts of
everyday names and phrases present an uphill battle for good search results.

DON’T GET TOO CREATIVE WITH SPELLING. Using creative spelling will actually increase your search engine
ranking, but only if your fans spell your name correctly. Take the band Gorillaz. Gorillaz fans know how the
band name is spelled and therefore don’t have a problem finding the band online. But if I heard of Gorillaz
from a friend, and didn’t know they used an “z” instead of an “s,” I might search for “gorillas” with an “s” and
find myself knee deep in articles about big hairy monkeys.

DON’T USE SPECIAL SYMBOLS %@#! Do you know how to put an umlaut over a ü when you type it into a
search engine? Chances are, a good portion of your fans don’t. Many special characters will be unrecognized
or ignored by search engines. Also some special characters can be misinterpreted by computer programs as
code and it can cause errors. Keep this in mind before you name your band: <Bl@st%>

DON’T PIGGY BACK. If you name your band The Katy Perry Experience you may get some traffic from Katy
Perry fans who stumble upon your site, but that doesn’t mean they’re going to buy your music. Collateral
traffic isn’t always the best quality. Also, popular news about Katy Perry may often supplant your good
rankings and there’s always the possibility you get sued or the world gets tired of Katy Perry.
 Chapter 3 | BAND NAMES 45

SEO DOS
USE MORE THAN ONE WORD. A single word band name will only be easily searchable if your band
name is unique such as Jamiroquai or Fugazi. But a unique band name can be hard to spell. Why
not use a cool juxtaposition of a few common words such as Arcade Fire, Daft Punk or Kings of
Leon. This way you can have a unique name that almost anybody can spell and easily find.

TEST YOUR BAND NAME IN GOOGLE. Let’s say I’d like to call my band Unicorn Bluff. Let’s search
for that name in Google. For a more accurate result, I’ll put “Unicorn Bluff ” in quotes so that
Google only searches for those two words strung together. In this case, there are only 307 results
for “Unicorn Bluff.” The top results are related to a unicorn poster. This looks promising. There
are no Facebook, YouTube, MySpace, or music related results on Google’s first page of results. My
only concern with this band name is that “unicorn” has been a popular word in recent years for
band names. So I might also do a search for “unicorn band” to see what my competition looks like.

RESEARCH YOUR DOMAIN NAME. A good domain name that is close to your actual band name will
make it easier for people to find you online. If my band name is Unicorn Bluff, my ideal website is
www.unicornbluff.com. Unicornb-forever.net would be less than ideal because it does not contain
both keywords of my band name and it may be hard for my fans to remember.

If my first choice wasn’t available, I might go with: www.unicornbluff.net, www.unicornbluff.co or

www.unicornbluffmusic.com. Make sure to check on the availability of domain names while
you do your research. A good domain name will make it much easier for your fans to find you.

TRADEMARK YOUR BAND NAME. Once you’ve found the perfect SEO friendly band name, you
should trademark it so nobody else can lay claim to it.

Use www.namechk.com to check your desired band name on TONS of social networks all from
one site!

Sweden is a band from Norway.

The Boards Of Canada – Scottish!
The band Saskatchewan is from Orlando.
46 BAND:SMART

1. 2. 3.

4. 5. 6.

7. 8. 9.

10. 11.

I love the way the JaGoFF logo is

instantly recognizable, even at a
distance or when it is customized.
 Chapter 3 | BAND NAMES 47

12. 13. It has to have an identity

that is yours and yours
only. I cannot stress this
enough. You have to find
your sound, luck, humor
and message that make
your band stick out of
the ten million headed
monster of bands in the
world.
– Anders Odden

Branding: Making a great

logo, using it for the rest
of your life, and putting
14. 15. it on EVERYTHING you
do (like the ol’ NIN —
everyone instantly knows
what that is).
– John Wheeler

If your band wants me

to use the horrible logo
your 5th grade cousin
drew, then don’t have
a better one on your
facebook profile. I will
use the one that does
not look like crap.
- Stephen Harm

JaGoFF Publishing
1. Standard Logo 6. Breast Cancer Awareness 11. Day of the Dead

2. Gay Pride 7. Occupy 12. Change / BP Spill

3. Marriage Equality 8. Walker Recall 13. Happy Buy Nothing Day

4. ACTA 9. Halloween 14. Vote

5. Fukishima 10. Santa 15. SOPA Blackout Day

48 BAND:SMART

In the same way that brands pay attention to their market and their goals before creating a logo, you should,
too. I don’t want to get into the insanely elaborate unreadable metal logos that are out there, but that’s
obviously a style if you are in that niche. Colours affect your logo and design, but the most important factor
here is you knowing who you are. You need to do this anyway (especially to find your social media voice
later) so think about this stuff now!

Don’t think for a second that the amount of money you spend has anything to do with the power or strength
of your logo. Twitter spent less than $20 on theirs! I think the Nike swoosh was $50 or so. You can get a logo
on Fiverr for, er, a fiver! Many owners of businesses design or create their logos themselves. I am not saying
that I am a designer, but I put together my band’s logo slightly by accident on a computer at FedEx Kinkos.

There is no reason that you can’t mess around with some different logos. Pay attention to the stickers that
people choose or the shirts that people buy — that’s the logo that’s speaking to them.

Be careful: You don’t want to get into a fight you can’t win, but if your logo can be used without any wording
and still communicate your brand to people, you’re in awesome territory.

I love this picture of Hugh Lee (not just because my students

made the shirts for him). It doesn't need a caption — any
picture taken of him answers the first question that it poses.

Photo: Alex Alvarez

 Songs

The romance and the magic of creativity comes down to this for me: it’s just like taking a big crap. I’m tied in knots
beforehand and relieved and red faced afterwards.

When an idea is inside of me, it affects me physically. On one hand it keeps bouncing around in my head, taking up space
until I write it down. On the other hand, until the idea has left my body and I can view it/hear it from a distance that it is
literally going to constipate me until I can get it out/down on disc, tape, paper, pissing in the snow, pencil or singing it into
my voice mail, WHATEVER. Sometimes it is much more complicated. An idea is prodding me for attention and it might
take days before I have cleared away enough of the overlaying of other tracks and ideas to support the voice that has been
overlooked or buried.

Songwriting is NOT what Sir Paul McCartney said — falling asleep then waking up with A fantastic composition
"Eleanor Rigby" magically written on the back of a cigarette pack. It's hard work filled with transcends quality.
many versions making incremental progress towards a better and better song.
– Sep V

49
50 BAND:SMART

If you write 30 songs, 10 will be better than your other 20. The next 10 you write will be better than
that, allowing for some messed up, experimental stuff that leads nowhere (as opposed to the messed up
experimental stuff that leads to innovation, hookiness, and worldwide success). You need more songs
because you need to give one album away for free and have a second album (the B-sides, the lost tapes, songs
from the cutting room floor, the songs your producer didn’t like but he’s a jerk so now here they are) that
you can sell. This is a very important part of being able to sustain and it is completely within your control.

I like when me and Taylor Swift had a version of her album at Target with three extra songs and demos!
music get in a fight,
cause the make-up
sex is phenomenal.
Think of your songwriting ability like a muscle. You can't run a marathon on your first day as a runner. You
– Bangalore Chris David train. You run a little more each day. When you work out your "songwriting brain" and really get it pumping,
it can move mountains, move people, pose a question, change minds, start an uprising, or make someone cry.

Write 50 songs. You’ll get better. You’ll piss yourself off. You’ll do silly things with words about subjects
that you never thought you could write about. You can use some of that wordplay technique on another
song somewhere in the future. Then you just have to distance yourself from all of it or trust someone (a
The best part about producer, perhaps, or fans who vote with clicks) to sift out the good from the bad. Ten of those songs will
dating a musician is be awesome and ten will be appalling. Your next ten will be staggeringly better than the first 50. You just
all the things they have to do the work.
wrote about their
exes. Errr...wait... Creativity is what you have to do. It's not a decision, it is something that itches like a rash, keeps you up
and bounces around until you make all of the pieces fit.
– Sarah Saturday
The art vs. business struggle continues... except that there is no struggle.

Art always wins! Then, the business of it fails and the art loses. ALWAYS.

Business is not evil. Art is not a badge to wear. It's an affliction that does not need to be compounded by
bad business or worse... the denial that business exists.
 Chapter 4 | SONGS 51

YOU are the worst person at choosing a single for a project you are involved in. Enlist your fans’ help in deciding
this. Apparently, Jason Mraz decided to buck his major label advice for his latest hit “I’m Yours”. Since he was
getting a better reaction to this song than others, he saw this as the sign that this should be the single. What did he
get in return? 71 weeks on the Billboard chart.
- Jesse Cannon

WORRIED ABOUT HOW HARD IT WILL BE TO WRITE 50 SONGS? GREAT!

LEAVE SOME SPACE FOR THE REST OF US YOU LAZY BASTARD.
If you find yourself staring at a blank screen, piece of paper, or your head is empty — try one of these not
proven but interesting techniques for songwriters.

THE CUT-UP TECHNIQUE

Write random words and sentences then cut them up and re-group them like the refrigerator magnet
game. Words collide in interesting and different ways than you might imagine. Often, just listening gives
you a different perspective. A German friend was talking about drugs one day and referred to "stronger"
drugs as BIG drugs. Boom! Out comes the note book — song title!

RHYMING
Rhyming acts as a memory prompt, and the more your song gets sung in someone's head, the deeper
it gets embedded. Although, as of this writing, there are no royalties for songs played in people's heads
(that's something else for you 80s old style music business jerks to complain about.)

Rhyming plants seeds in the memory. Those seeds can sprout and fill a brain like spiders eggs laid in
your ears.

THE MORE YOUR SONG GETS SUNG, Rhyming: It's not only important, it
THE MORE THE DOLLAR BELL GETS RUNG. can get you off a murder charge!
If it does not fit you must acquit!

CREATE BROAD EXPERIENCES

If you can distill it down, and broaden things out — create some experience that makes your song
everyone's, you might get some traction. Be clever, but not too clever.

"We sang shang a lang as we ran with the gang do it do wop be do be do way.”* I rest my case.* The penis
mightier than the sword. (Yes, that was deliberate!)

* I don't have to tell you that's the Bay City Rollers.

52 BAND:SMART

SET OBSTACLES
I like the idea of setting obstacles when writing to see what happens. Write an album of songs that
feature garden tools. Follow these tips and you’ll be raking it in!

• I've got hoes in different area codes

• Got 99 problems but even distribution of my fertilizer ain’t one
• Let's get ploughed!
• Marvin Gaye wrote a song about an onion.
• Neil Young wrote a song about HomeGrown and I don’t think he was talking about tomatoes.
• “Me, I’m just a lawnmower” – wasn’t that Genesis?

Or only use washing machine analogies, metaphors and similes to create an album of love songs:
• The bleach of my love will never remove the stain her lipstick made on my heart.
• Your love sticks to me like the stain on your snow white underpants.
• I miss you, like a reach for the dryer sheet at the bottom of an empty box.
• Our love is stronger than dirt.

Yes, I know, crap, but it’s an interesting exercise and a sponsorship deal with Maytag. I already have the
album cover designed in my head.

YOU NEED MORE SONGS YOU CAN SELL, GIVE AWAY, AND TRASH.
LISTEN TO YOUR FANS ONLINE – OR WATCH THEIR REACTION LIVE.

top ten rules for better songwriting

darren monson

1 DON’T BE A PERFECTIONIST. Write a LOT. Churn songs out, bin them

and churn more out. Don’t be a perfectionist. The aim is to improve over
time, not to sit down and craft the perfect pop song on your first attempt.

2 GET FEEDBACK AS OFTEN AS POSSIBLE. Be fearless with your songs.

It’s OK if you write a crap song. What is not OK is to try and convince
everyone that it’s a great song! Get feedback and allow people to be honest,
that way you will start to learn what really works.

3 HOT AND COLD. I am talking about combining opposites such as spiccato

and legato (short and long). When you have long held chords, try a
shorter or snappier vocal line. If you have a funky bass line you might want to
opt for a simpler, more solid guitar part. It’s simple stuff, but worth thinking
about when writing or producing.
 Chapter 4 | SONGS 53

4 LEARN TO UNLEARN. Don’t be afraid to break the rules. If it sounds good to you then do it!

5 THE DISADVANTAGE OF TALENT. Raw talent can take someone 10% of the way to success, but hard work
and determination make up the rest. The problem with naturally talented people is that they never learn
to accept failure and find it harder to accept defeat. People who are average (but with a burning desire to win)
are in many ways better equipped to stay the course and succeed long term.

6 SEE THE BIGGER PICTURE (ALWAYS). Develop the part of your brain that can listen to and analyze the
whole picture, instead of focusing on tiny details. You should be able to hear instantly what is needed to
make your songs work. Avoid analysis paralysis. Michael Jacksons “Thriller” album was recorded in four weeks
and producer Quincy Jones says that the limited time actually helped as they were unable to over analyze.

7 SAY IT DIFFERENTLY. We all know that there are common lyrical themes in music. I would guess that
the topic of ‘love’ is the most widely used lyrical theme. Using tried and tested themes can be a good
thing, but you should always try and say it differently. For example, Dianne Warren said “Un-break my heart”
instead of “Mend my heart”. She invented a new phrase to say the same thing a million other songs have said
before and it worked perfectly.

8 KEEP IT SIMPLE. It is a kind of ‘musicians curse’ to assume that complicated means better. Get used to writing
simpler songs that have more hooks and adhere to common (natural) arrangement structures. Remember,
you will hear the song over and over but your audience will have to ‘get’ it on the first listen. Keep it simple people!

9 WORK WITH OTHERS.Even if you don’t like working with others, please try it. You’ll see that in many
cases more heads really can be better than one. Working with others forces you to move away from your
comfort zone and in my experience produces better songs. The process of getting input from more people
during the writing process is healthy and makes it unlikely that you’ll write a real stinker!

10 TAKE REGULAR BREAKS. Have you ever worked on a song for 15 hours straight and been totally
disappointed with the result? It’s happened to me many times! Doing anything creative can lead
you down a rabbit hole of endless ideas that (if no breaks are taken) can spiral into complex introverted
expression. In other words, take a bloody break and come back with fresh ears!

SliceThePie.com is a great way to

have a bunch of people review
your music, a great way for a
new band to get feedback on
their songs and adjust before
recording/releasing, etc.

Learn how to write great songs. It starts and ends with the song.
After all, you can be the biggest marketing genius, if the songs are no
good you’re going to fail. Guaranteed. Do your research and become
song
b e r, y o u w ill hear the an expert: listen to the radio and analyze the hits, read songwriting
Remem ce
o v e r b u t your audien books, co-write with more experienced writers, attend songwriters’
over and e t’ it on the
first workshops and seminars. Learn about intros, verses, bridges,
a v e to ‘g
will h le!
n . K e e p it simple peop choruses, hooks, strong lyrics. Then blow me away.
lis te
- Tony van Veen
54 BAND:SMART

5 things you should know before

writing political songs
Jon Ostrow
MUSIC HAS THE POWER TO CREATE A
MOVEMENT.
Throughout music history, songwriters all over the world have used this power
to speak out and raise awareness about political issues. From genocide and racial
atrocities, to class warfare and economic unbalance, every (or almost every) major
political issue of the last 50 years has been given a soundtrack by a songwriter that
felt strongly enough to put their feelings into song.

In fact, some of the best songwriters of all time are considered as such because of
their ability to stir the pot and get people in motion to act against political injustice.

A few important examples of famous political songs are:

• Bob Dylan: The Times They Are A Changin’ // Written in 1964 during the
civil rights movement in the US, this song became the soundtrack for the movement.
• Bob Marley: Redemption Song // A hopeful protest song written during time of unrest in Jamaica.
• John Lennon: Imagine // Easily considered to be the most important anti-war, pro-peace song ever written.
• The Sex Pistols: God Save The Queen // Commentary on the economic divide in England during the 1970s, this
song took direct aim at UKs elite class, meanwhile giving a voice to the unrepresented, lower class.
• Rage Against The Machine: Killing In The Name Of // Written in reaction to the 1992 acquittal of the
four police officers accused of assaulting Rodney King (which sparked the infamous LA Race Riots),
this song has since become the soundtrack to racial injustice.
• Notorious B.I.G: Things Done Changed // A terrifyingly realistic portrayal of the economic divide and
widespread crack cocaine epidemic that plagued many inner city neighborhoods in the early 90's.

5 THINGS TO CONSIDER WHEN WRITING YOUR OWN SONGS:

1 TELL A STORY. Whether you tell a personal story or just paint a picture of what the victim of the political
issues would experience, telling a story is one of the most important and effective ways to connect the
significance of the issue with the listener.

2 BE PERSONAL. Often times, songwriters will try to simply write a political

song for the sake of writing one, but without having a personal connection to
the issue, the song will likely fall flat with connecting with others on a widespread
I have never written a
song by myself.
– Chuck D
 Chapter 4 | SONGS 55

level. An effective political song should show passion about the issue and more importantly, what it takes to
right the wrong, so if you attempt to take on a political injustice through song, make sure it is something you
personally feel strongly about.

3 OPINION MATTERS. Writing an effective political song is more than just laying out the facts, it is about
adding in your own commentary and again showing the passion as to why you feel it is so important to
address the issues within your song head on.

4 THE SONG MUST BE THE PRIMARY FOCUS. While the lyrical content and political message will obviously
be in the spotlight, that doesn’t mean you can forego quality songwriting! This is a big mistake that so
many make and believe it or not, it can lessen the effectiveness of the lyrics and message if the song isn’t
worth listening to. All of the songs listed above made a difference, and all tell an important political message,
but first and most importantly each is a fantastic song worth listening to.

5 SHOULD BE CURRENT AND RELEVANT. This would seem obvious enough but it is important to state;
if you are going to write a political song, make sure it is current and relevant if you want it to energize
people. While WWII and the Vietnam War were important, writing political songs about them now is less
social commentary and more a nostalgia piece. The latter is absolutely fine if that’s what you are going for,
but it if not, it is certainly something to be wary of.

If songs 1-7 rule and 8-15 blow… do me a favor

and release a 7 song record. I hate getting less
interested as a record goes forward.
–Stephen Francis

Everyone is optimistic at the beginning.

In the middle, it’s, “Oh no!” then it starts
to be ominous, but that tension is so
important to creativity.
– Jeff Castelaz
56 BAND:SMART
 Image

Photo: MaryTaylorBunny by ChadMichaelWard

A good image is like the hook of a song. It’s repeatable, recognizable from a distance, and sticks with you.

The idea of image feels as though it has gone through the same changes that marketing has gone through.
You don’t get to hear
Marketing isn’t fake, temporary, celluloid fabricated anymore — it’s real. Image is no longer just having a
the music unless you
look, it’s what you do. Image used to be the look you chose, a carefully orchestrated picture with the hair
like the image...
just right, the makeup freshly applied, the chins not so visible, and the blemishes camouflaged. Now your – Miles Copeland
image is everything you say, do, feel, project, blurt, spew, write, draw, sing, play, beat, smoke, and ingest.

Every time you look at the camera, put on the perfect front, somebody else is taking a photograph from the back. The image,
now, is more than two dimensional; it’s three dimensional physically and spiritually. The things you think and say can change
the way a song is perceived. The way you look and act changes the way people feel about you more than how you look
temporarily in a photograph. Staged is false.

57
58 BAND:SMART

We get back to the value of authenticity and the need to look inwards. Center yourself before you start
to project outwards because if it is not real or consistent (and I think the only way for it to be consistent
is for it to be real) then it will erode and crumble over time.

Have fun with your image. Think. Work on becoming who you are or discover the person you’re
comfortable living with before you show people. It’s internal and external. Don’t choose to be the guy
in the rubber underwear if you don’t want to live with a rash and put ointment on your rider (and other
places). Don’t decide to be Robin Hood if you like to ride in limos. Don’t pretend to love your fans if you
really hate people, love money, and despise everything.

I imagine Liberace always in sequins and feathers immaculately dressed with rings and a chauffeur.
That’s tough if that’s the image you choose for yourself when you need to go down to Target or the
grocery store to get some cat food in your sweat pants.

IF YOU CAN’T GET ATTENTION OR VISIBILITY –

CHANGE THE BACKGROUND OR CONTEXT.
Stand out from your background or change the background! Your fake Indian Chief Headress, plastic
pants, and sheet-rocking stilts will seem common place and boring at the Village People Reunion bash
on Halloween in NYC. BUT, wear that stuff to the DMV! Now we have action, memorability, and, yes,
possible arrest but it’s all a balancing act, especially with the sheet-rocking stilts.

IMAGES ARE MARKETING

Don’t get pulled into some rock and roll 1980s “no cameras allowed” bull at your shows. Let your fans
take pics — and tag them! ENCOURAGE IT! Take photos with fans before and after the show!

Metadata your images! Make sure you read the section on making your website images searchable! (Read
more in SEO.)

Pictures of faces are more powerful

than pictures of instruments or cool
graphics from your album cover.

Don’t wear ball caps. Photographers hate them.

– Jason Pettigrew
 Chapter 5 | IMAGE 59

Good imagery still matters

Make sure you have great publicity photographs and you know how to use them
at the apPropriate resolutions, online and ofFline. Hire a profesSional
photographer who already has a terRific portfolio fulL of musicians. Why
spend real money and time to loOk goOd? One reason is that newspapers often
choOse which photos to run based on the decision of the paper’s photo editor,
not the review stafF.

AND IN THIS BUSINESS, A PHOTO WITH A CAPTION

IS WORTH FAR MORE THAN 1,000 WORDS.
The same principle holds true when packaging your CD. Use a profesSional
designer, use profesSional photos, and make sure you loOk as goOd as you
sound to your potential customers, fans, and industry contacts.

– Micah Solomon

There is no single way to produce a great press photo. As long as you’ve

left an impression and piqued the curiosity of a potential fan then you’ve
succeeded. Don’t fret. You can keep trying different ideas until you see
that one magic photo that just hits you in the right way, the one where you
say, “Oh yeah! That is how I want the world to see me!” Just do me a favor and
stay away from the railroad tracks. It isn’t safe down there anyways.

- Chris Robley

Present yourself, in a way in which you wish to be perceived. This includes

the way you dresS, your online presence and branding, the things and the
people you asSociate with. You control what the perception of your band/
music is before the general public even hears a note of it. Packaging your
products, promoting them and marketing them under one branded image is
esSential to sticking out in the over saturated areas within independent
music comMunities.
- Shawn KelLner
60 BAND:SMART

getting the best out of

a photo shoot
Paul Natkin
Step 1: Be professional! Plan what you want before the shoot. Discuss with the
photographer what you are looking for from the shoot. Publicity shot? Website usage?
CD packaging? All of the above?

• If the photos are going to be used for CD packaging, make sure you plan the
package with your manufacturing company first. Jewel box or DigiPak? Clear
or grey tray? Booklet? How many pages? How many photos will you need for
the package?

• Find an art director to design the package,based on a template that the manufacturer
will provide. This will allow you to know what needs to be shot on the day of
the shoot.

Step 2: Discuss photographic rights to the final images (and the fee). Every photographer has a different idea
of what rights belong to what party. You should always have the rights to use the photos for publicity and web
use, but might have to negotiate a higher rate for cover art use. The photographer always owns the copyright
to the images, unless you negotiate that transfer in advance (usually at a much greater fee).

Step 3: Decide on the concept for the shoot. Photo studio in front of a background? Location shoot? Indoors?
Outside? Maybe use your rehearsal space for a location. Somebody’s house if it has the right look? Outside
if weather permits? The main thing to remember here is that the photos should convey the vibe of the artist.

Step 4: Schedule the shoot. Plan a time when you can all easily get to the location ON TIME. Have an
alternative location set in case of rain or snow. Try not to shoot outside at noon, when the sun is directly
overhead. Everyone will look like they have bags under their eyes!

Step 5: Practice poses! Just as you practice for a show, practice for a photo shoot. Prepare for the shoot. Lay
out whatever you are going to bring the night before. Make sure that all the clothes fit.

Step 6: BE ON TIME!!!!!!!!!!! Being on time means being 10 minutes early. If one of your band members has
trouble being on time, pick him or her up. Or lie to him and tell him that the shoot is a half an hour before it
actually is. You should treat a photo shoot the same as you would treat a gig. Prepare and put on a professional
show. If you are going to have instruments in the photo, make sure that they are clean and polished- unless
your plan is to make them look grubby.

Step 7: When you arrive, treat the photographer’s space as you would your own. (Or better). Ask where you
can hang up clothes and where to put cases. Don’t open the refrigerator unless you ask first.
 Chapter 5 | IMAGE 61

Step 8: Listen to the photographer during the shoot. If he tells someone to move back a half a step, it
is probably because that person is blocking the light hitting the person next to him. Treat the shoot in a
professional manner.

Step 9: Pack well and double check that everything you came with goes with you. Try not to leave anything
behind. Remember, this is just like a gig. Check the dressing room before you leave, also, make arrangements
to pick up the photos (when and where).

Dress sharp, and dress the same

as you do in videos, in pictures, on
the album and live. The more your
peers think your image is over
the top, the better it probably is.
Everyone must remember you and
recognize you in an instant.
– John Wheeler

For God's sakes, hire a real photographer, not your bass player's lady friend
who's going to take photos of you in front of a brick wall while standing on a
ladder. Those shots will be super edgy and stand out... said no one ever. A lot
of times, a pro photographer with real creds that you hire can introduce you
to other pro people if you're not a complete pain to work with. Guess what:
the connections they likely have (if they're for real) can easily be worth more
than the photos they take.
-Kent Nielsen
62 BAND:SMART

Do Something!
Mary Sweeney
By day I am a portrait photographer. I am hired to photograph people in the most
flattering way. If a portrait photographer agrees to shoot your show, you should be
extremely grateful. I know that makes me sound a bit full of myself but it has absolutely
nothing to do with my ego. When a portrait photographer approaches their subject they
have one objective — make this person look their best. A portrait photographer knows
how to edit and what to edit. While I don’t want to change what happened on stage I
will make minor changes to the finished “view” of it. Picture this: major label band —
lead singer did the entire show with his fly open. When I posted the photos I made sure
to zip him up first. Another singer during an outdoor festival gave me the jump shot to
end all jump shots. His entire crotch was soaked from sweat but it could have easily been
captioned “wasted singer in a fit of rage wets his pants on stage”. I posted and printed
the final photo sweat free. I get that people sweat but if it can potentially put that person
in jeopardy of bad press — I will fix it. I don’t want to see photos of me looking bad so
I don’t take photos of others in compromising ways — I’ll leave that to the paparazzi.

The last bit of advice regarding the photo pit is this: there are good photographers and
bad photographers. Some are there to do a job and some are there to do a job AND
genuinely want to help you and your band. I will give you a fool-proof way to tell the
difference between them so you get the best photos. Look down into the pit and find the
one that’s dancing — she’s the one you let shoot for the entire show and use some flash. ;)

THE GREATEST LIVE CONCERT PHOTO EVER!

… will not be of you if you don’t interact with your band mates or the audience or if you seem to be totally
disinterested in your own music. Why would anyone pay to go to a concert to see a band perform if the band
isn’t going to perform? Take a quick look out at your audience — if no one is taking snap shots you’ve got
yourself a problem.

Getting a great performance photo is no different than getting an audience in front of your band and keeping
them there.

DO SOMETHING ON THE STAGE!

Don’t say you’re the most amazing guitarist that ever lived and then hide behind the drummer. When I go to
see your show, I should NEED to photograph you to let the rest of the world know that they are missing out
on the most amazing guitarist that ever lived. If I am inspired to exert the energy it takes to lift my camera
to my eye then you are doing something right. Keep doing it and I will climb over equipment or hang from
a girder to capture that magical moment when you do something.

Let’s discuss what you are trying to accomplish when you perform. You are plain and simply — trying to sell
your music. If you start posting photos from your performances that show you doing something then all the
friends you have been and will be collecting on all your social media sites will collectively say, “I NEED to be
 Chapter 5 | IMAGE 63

there the next time they do something!” We have all had a job at one point
or another that was customer service based in some way. When you are on
stage there is a whole group of people standing in front of you that want to
buy something from you. They have an interest. They want to buy. All you
need to do is something. Do something = sell your music. Do something =
Greatest Live Concert Photo Ever!

So what do I mean when I say do something? This is an example of the

difference between doing something and doing nothing from Madison
based band Sexy Ester. The first time I shot the band, there was almost
no movement from any of the guys in the band. Lyndsay would step out
S OF WHICH
occasionally but the performance felt uncomfortably restrained. We had ODE TO DRUMMER
S SUPPLY OF
a few discussions after about what they really wanted the look and feel of I HAVE AN ENDLES
PHOTOS
their band to be. These images are from the show following these chats — DOING SOMETHING
when they decided to do something to connect with their audience.

Great live performance photos come from many different places. Yeah, the
jumpers are my favorites.

THERE’S NOTHING LIKE FREEZING AN EXPLOSION OF ENERGY

SO THAT IT LINGERS IN MID AIR FOREVER.
Without hearing the music you just know — something happened that VOCALISTS THAT CA
N F*#K
was worth seeing. There are also those moments of raw emotion that are THE WORLD BECA
USE THEY
expressed on a guitarist’s face when launching into a solo or the strain DO SOMETHING.
of a full scream exiting a singer’s mouth. A performer’s connection and
involvement with his/her music is what makes a great photo.

It also takes great timing. I listen to the music so I know exactly when that
change-up is going to happen or when that stick is going to wreck havoc
with a cymbal. I will look through the view finder with one eye while the
other scans the stage. I will notice the look the bass player gives the singer
and know that something is going to happen and I’ll be ready for it. This
shot of Mikey Martin of the Shiny Toy Guns was a once in a lifetime
photo. I had never met him before this show but he was watching me move
ITARISTS
around the stage taking photos. When I returned to his end of the stage, O S T A MAZING GU
TH E M AUSE
LIVED BEC
he looked at me and nodded ever so slightly and I raised the camera. It was THAT EVER .
OMETHING
then that he bit down on the cymbal. A couple of years later he told me THEY DO S
this was the one and only time he has done this. You see, right after I took
the picture the singer/guitarist Chad Petree hit the cymbal with his guitar.
Mikey said the pain was excruciating and he was sure he was going to lose
every tooth in his mouth.

The “Greatest Live Concert Photo Ever” will be of you if you DO

SOMETHING!

MIKEY MARTIN OF SHINY TOY GUNS

64 BAND:SMART
 Rehearsal

practice for catastrophe

It’s not about being able to be put on a great performance when everything is perfect (monitors, underwear, stage height,
lights, PA system, dressing room, availability of toilets, crowd response etc.).

It’s about being amazing when you absolutely shouldn’t and any self respecting artist would have thrown down their
instruments and stormed off stage in a huff.

Practice being great in impossible situations. Practice in three inches of water with only four strings on your guitar with
the ceiling falling on your head and the microphone cutting in and out while the drummer is so angry he is throwing lit
cigarettes at you.

65
66 BAND:SMART

Smile, smile, smile! Give yourself electric cattle prod shocks every time you gaze at your shoes... and,
when all of this happens at your opening slot on Lollapalooza... Be amazing! You can laugh in the face
of adversity and you’ll be triumphant!

Professionals, critics, people who can make a difference to all of your next steps, will notice how amazing you
are (not at playing your instrument because that’s boring these days — but at overcoming adversity!) YES!

THINK about the other things to practice for too — your band might be some unstoppable formula: a racecar
speeding down the fast lane of blah blah blah — but you also need a pit crew that’s slick and superfast at
repairing damaged equipment guitars, hair, pants, egos disguising pools of vomit or worse — someone needs
to practice for that – and, in the beginning stages (and for much longer than that) — it’ll be YOU!

KEEP IT SIMPLE. BECAUSE THE PEOPLE YOU ARE WORKING WITH WILL BE.
Look at issues that might come up during an opening slot — look at your cabling and labeling, make sure
you are on a mission to end confusion — you want to be able to hand a sound man two cables (left and
right) and say ‘here you go!’ keep it simple. Because the people you are working with will be.

build your own rehearsal room

I built a floating rehearsal room for Killing Joke. We were rehearsing in central London and I was tired
of sweating behind the drums all day and sweating as I rode two trains and a bus back to the flat I was
staying in... so I built my own rehearsal space in Chicago, just a few feet from my apartment!

Where plans had called for the floating room to be floated on neoprene hockey pucks, I pulled rubber
brake hoses (with the brass nozzles still attached) from a dumpster of an auto parts supply house. I sealed
one end with tape and carefully filled the tube with sand so that the rubber hose wouldn’t collapse. Then,
I sealed the end of the tube with gasket sealer and more tape. This saved a couple of thousand dollars. It
was a good thing I did this because the club space downstairs was rented out to an older woman, who put
her bedroom directly underneath the rehearsal room.

It’s not just about saving money on rehearsals, having the room enabled me to add a small control room
and start Mattress Factory Studios. This began the studio part of my life, allowed my production skills to
flourish, and encouraged countless projects to happen that might not have otherwise (Pigface, ohGr, Spasm).

Of course, if you can’t build your own, find a place as close as you can for everyone. Try and be fair! Think
about access times (when you want), security, and isolation (not in the Russian novel sense, but in the sense
that you don’t want to hear the bands next door and above all the time). Stairs, light, elevators, garbage,
bathrooms — you are going to be there for long periods of time, so pay attention. More spaces these days
are adding networking and community benefitting events to their list of services. Look for that too!

Every new band should have to rehearse in freezing old factories

with crap gear and no bloody career agenda other than to escape
boredom. That's what went wrong in the 2000's...
– Andy Booth
 Chapter 6 | REHEARSAL 67

Floating Floor and Wall

4.

5.

6.

7.

1. 8.
9.

10.

11.
12.
2. 13.

14.
3.
From a sketch originally by Joe Trump

1. 1/2" x 31/2" Neoprene 6. 5/8" Sheetrock 11. 3/4" Plywood/Particle Board

2. Existing Floor 7. 2" x 4" Stud 12. 1/2" Sound Deadening Board

3. Air Gap 8. Silicone Caulk 13. 3/4" Plywood/Particle Board

4. 3 Layers R-19 Fiberglass 9. 3/4" Plywood/Particle Board 14. 1/2" x 2" Heavy Duty Neoprene
Shock Absorbers
5. Sound Deadening Board 10. Sand or Fiberglass R-19
68 BAND:SMART

Your Band's Rehearsal Spot

Kent Nielsen
ARE YOU LOOKING TO MAKE A RACKET OR ARE
YOU LOOKING TO MAKE IT?
Time for a quick whack on the head. Too often I see young bands come into Fort
Knox and they are focused on the wrong things.

One of the first things everyone at the studio notices is volume level. Yes, if you play
ridiculously loud while rehearsing we'll certainly notice... and shake our heads. Look
at how pros rehearse: lower volume levels mean less ear fatigue (and no headaches),
which means you can actually be productive for a far longer time period. Don't take my word for it: ask just about
any pro musician if they have IEMs and they know how to use them. Sonic clarity, 100% controllable volume level
in the ear, your own mix and hearing health are the hallmarks. If you haven't tried them, they're awesome and when
I see a band 'on ears' with lower FOH volume it automatically ratchets up my impression of them on the pro scale.

A band's philosophy of playing too loud in rehearsal often translates to the shows. The venue owner is hiring
you to bring people in and the audience in turn buys F&B from the venue, whether it's a coffee shop or
Coachella. If you're so stinking loud that the audience can't stand it and leaves the show, they aren't buying
stuff and you're not coming back to play. There is a maxim in the military: train like you fight. If you play too
loud in practice, you're going to probably be too loud at the show.

If you read this and think "yeah but being loud is what we do live", unless you're in AC/DC or Metallica,
you're probably an idiot or your material is terrible and you figure sheer volume will cover up your faults.
Wrong. I've made my point. Onward.

Time for another old school but annoyingly correct maxim, this time Sun Tzu: "Every battle is won before
it's ever fought." Okay, so how does a military philosopher from 2,500 years ago have any relevance to being
in a band? Bear with me.

What Sun Tzu is postulating here is that the one who is better prepared (in all aspects) for the battle wins the
battle. Bands don't battle (8 Mile flow about Mom's spaghetti excepted), but they do compete for audience.

Elsewhere in both this book and Martin's excellent previous book, topics such as advancing the gig, merch,
booking, routing, et cetera are covered. I'm (hopefully) not going to rehash what someone smarter has already
more eloquently written on those topics than I can/will. So I won't.

Here's a question to ask yourself that you may not have considered: Besides providing a place to get loud, what is
our rehearsal space doing for the band? If you practice in your basement, garage or the back room in your Uncle
Goober's creepo warehouse, the answer is absolutely nothing. Like all things in life, you get what you pay for.
 Chapter 6 | REHEARSAL 69

Donning my EntrepreneurTM embroidered polo shirt for a second: your band is a business, your music is
your product and your rehearsal space is the office. Looking at all the bands that rehearse in a commercial
rehearsal space, what they are creating by default is sector density. Lots of guitar players, singers, MC's, bass
players, drummers, keys players and all the various other breeds. If you go to a major city and you visit a
dentist, a lot of times they're in a building full of dentists. Why? Because dentists often specialize in different
things and they can refer business to each other inside the building.

Music industry folks often give the advice that a young band should link up with other bands in the same
genre and do shows together. Great 30,000 foot idea. But how to do it? Huge Idea Number One:

WALK AROUND A REHEARSAL SPOT AND JUST LISTEN TO THE OTHER BANDS PLAY.
Ideally you do this more than once on different days as most bands don't rehearse seven days a week. Then,
when you hear something good, wait for them to finish a song and knock on the door. If you happen to have
beers in your hands when you do so, since the only thing us musicians like more than licking windows is
drinking beer, guess what, instant friends.

Band businesses interact with other various types of businesses, such as photographers, managers, booking
agents, promoters, producers, engineers and fans. What exists thusly in a larger rehearsal facility is a network
that you can easily work yourself into that will provide you with all of the opportunities and resources to get
your band to the next level. Do you need some better publicity photos? Guess what, add up all the other bands
and they have collectively worked with a ton of photographers, some good, some great, some terrible. Why on
earth would you not find the right photog to shoot your band when it's as easy as asking your neighbors? Same
for engineers, producers, studios, promoters, managers and booking agents. Huge Idea Number Two:

TALK TO YOUR NEIGHBORS ABOUT THE FOLKS THEY'VE

WORKED WITH, WHO'S GREAT AND WHO'S NOT.
Even if your band is a week old, start learning about who some of these other professionals are, and more
importantly, their reputations (get more than one opinion!). Even if you're too early to need a booking agent,
you want to know who that person should be as early as possible. Then you can get to know that person over
a few months before trying to work with them.

There is another group of people who likely love music and know a thing or two about what's going on in a
rehearsal/production facility. These people are called staff. Huge Idea Number Three:

MAKE FRIENDS WITH THE STAFF.

They often have the unique perspective of seeing everyone coming through and can steer you towards
people, groups and other opportunities. They also can sometimes help you directly get shows or promo.
70 BAND:SMART

be more effective in
rehearsals
george massenburg
At rehearsals, everyone who’s relevant to a particular tune should be in attendance.
Start fresh; be prepared to work together until the scheduled end. One shouldn’t
necessarily stop rehearsing because one is tired of a particular song. If necessary, mix
it up; change tunes.

Cats should be patient if one of one's parts or instruments is dropped or changed

by common agreement. Always stick around to listen to ideas, and to help make
decisions as a band. Try to give new ideas “5 minutes of life”; first, try to consider the
positives of each new idea.

Record rehearsals and, in fact, keep a reference recorder running. Record as much music as possible
(very handy when you stumble across one of those magic moments). Record, by any means at hand, to
evaluate the songs, music and arrangements – EVERYTHING (except the recording technology or
quality). Don’t depend on a modest musical idea being saved by “that warm Behringer tube sound” or
16 track analog. In fact, don’t use Behringer at all.

Make a recording of the rehearsal, experiment with the

microphone postioning, and listen to the recording. Be as
unbiased as possible — listen as if you were listening to
someone else’s demo.

Audition a rehearsal space the way you would

a new member of the band.
- Zini Lardieri
 press kits
& PR

There is some great advice in this chapter about how to create a press kit, focus, brevity, knowing your audience (in
this case a journalist/blogger) but I want to talk just a little bit about the delivery method. SURE, get your information
together, organize it. Resist the temptation to waffle on and fill space. If there is lots of space in your one page press kit.
the solution is to DO STUFF — Do do stuff to fill it. Don't fill it with doo doo.

Resist the urge to crowdsource the best, most best, grooviest font — that doesn’t matter — the facts do.

Don’t say you are a hard working band — show it.

Don’t say that your audience is growing — show it.

Don’t say you are original in the middle of some press kit template — show it.

71
72 BAND:SMART

Easy has nothing to do with it (as in most things in this business). You can put up EPK’s all over the
place, and you should. ReverbNation lets that happen easily, and Sonic Bids make it easy to share and
access opportunities — but these are also uniformly easy to delete and ignore.

When I say delivery method I mean — inside a box of donuts.

Does anyone care — NO. Will they care about you when you present your release on top of a box of
donuts? NO, BUT — halfway through eating them, they’ll be overcome by a sugar spike and a white
powdered sugar moustache of empathy will spread over them like Nutella on your girlfriend's boobs. “So,
what’s this all about?” they’ll ask. And then you can tell them. That’s how this works. Not, “Listen to me,
we’re a great band!” There are thousands. But by understanding who you are dealing with: people, people
who like donuts or (insert something vegan here, insert something black metal here, insert something
appropriately inappropriate here) you can rely on the one thing — people might not like you very much
or know that you exist – but there are things that they do like. Give them that then let guilt do the rest.

There are NO economies of scale here — as soon as you print up 100 or more physical ‘kits’ something
will happen that will be so huge that you HAVE to put it in there — print as needed in small quantities,
update constantly and make sure you are doing something else to get attention

Read the Blackberry Jam Scam (See Demos), shake your head, read it again. Shut up. Deal with it.

There are no economies here. This might be your ONLY chance to get attention.
You only have ONE chance — ONE CHANCE (got it?) to make a first impression.
Pull out all of the stops and don’t skimp. Maybe wait until you have a message
a tiny buzz and the ability to back up and act on any great stuff that might might,
might happen — the spine thing is a no-brainer — Chris Payne, who used to
host a show on Q101, says that it’s the spines that help him find your needle
in their haystack. Make sure they are as clear as possible, not arty and clever.
 Chapter 7 | PRESS KITS & PR 73

danger! do not use! words

to avoid in your band bio
brian thompson
Words and phrases I never want to read in an artist’s bio, ever, ever again:

• molten • buzz worthy • critically acclaimed

• unique • one of a kind • eagerly anticipated
• brilliant • forged in the... • destined for success
• must-hear • fusing together • fuses blank with blank
• hailing from • up and coming

I think you get the idea, right? Please tell me you do.

Please?

THE BEST BIOS ARE ONES THAT CONTAIN NOTHING BUT FACTS.
If you use too many adjectives to puff yourself up and tell me how great you are, I won’t buy it.

Facts however, can’t be argued.

If you don’t have many facts around your band yet (because you’re new and just starting out), then just keep
your bio short. There’s nothing wrong with brevity. Trust me, people appreciate those who can be concise
with their words.

Be creative with your bio. Have some fun with it. But don’t be a braggart. If anything, sell yourself short so
that I can walk away impressed rather than underwhelmed.

And most important of all, intrigue me. The goal of your bio is for me to go to your website and click “Play”
on your music. Does your bio compel me to do that?

Oh yeah, and no matter how much this may hurt to hear… No one cares that you started playing piano at
the age of ten in your grandma’s basement.
74 BAND:SMART

the peRFect press kit

Ariel Hyatt
I’m often amazed when I go to an artist’s website, and I look around, and I’m
trying to find basic press information and I can’t.

It seems that in the age of Twitter, Facebook, and Facebook Fan pages, and
constantly focusing on your two-way conversations, we’ve forgotten the
important basics.

This is a revised excerpt from my book, Music Success in Nine Weeks and it
talks about an asset that no matter what we all face with new digital solutions,
new platforms and apps that we’re going to be forced to learn, we should always remember — your press kit.

It’s up to you to post your press information clearly and succinctly, so that you’re easy to find and write about. Posting an
accessible press kit to share with journalists and new media makers (bloggers, podcasters, etc.) is good common sense.

Editors need access to your information quickly, because they are constantly under deadline.

IF YOU DO NOT MAKE IT EASY FOR THEM TO GET YOUR

INFORMATION FROM YOUR SITE, THEY MAY MOVE
ON TO ANOTHER ONE OF THE 50 ARTISTS THAT
ARE PLAYING IN THEIR TOWN THAT SAME WEEK.

1 YOUR MUSIC — ALBUM OR LIVE TRACKS. Make sure you have some music available at your website
or a very obvious link to a page where people can hear the music instantly. Many newspapers are now
including online listings where they include MP3s of artists coming to town, so make it easy for them to grab
the tracks to add to their own sites — this is additional excellent exposure for you.

2 YOUR BIOGRAPHY — MUST INCLUDE YOUR PITCH. Make sure you have a short, succinct bio that can be
easily located on your site, in addition to the long form one from the blogs and all of the opinions from
each band member — which are fun for your fans but not for music writers who will be looking to get quick
information. Make sure this bio can be easily cut-and-pasted so writers can drop it into a preview or a column.

• CREATE A SHORT VERSION FOR THE CALENDAR EDITOR. Make sure you add your PITCH /USP
(Unique Selling Point) as a stand-alone portion to your bio that sums up your sound for calendar
editors. It should be no more than 10 words.

• POST 3 VERSIONS OF YOUR BIOS

1. Long Form
2. In 50 Words
3. In 1 Sentence (10 words or less)
 Chapter 7 | PRESS KITS & PR 75

• MAKE SURE THE BIO CAN BE EASILY CUT-AND-PASTED! Do NOT have your bio in Flash format;
make sure that editors can easily cut and paste it right off of your site.

3 YOUR PHOTOS — MAKE THEM EASY TO FIND AND DOWNLOAD. Thumbnails are great for quick and
easy loading but are detrimental for use in newspapers. You should always have a few downloadable
photos on your site in at least 300 dpi / jpg format.

• CREATE AN EASY-TO-SEE LINK THAT SAYS “CLICK HERE FOR A HI RES / LOW RES JPG.” That
way photo editors can get to them easily. When the photos are downloaded; make sure they are
properly named with your name or your band’s name, so that photo editors can find them in
folders and on messy desktops!

• REMEMBER TO CHANGE YOUR PHOTOS A FEW TIMES A YEAR – So if you play the same markets
over and over, you can give the media multiple options for covering you.

• PUT THE BAND MEMBERS’ NAMES FROM LEFT TO RIGHT (L-R) UNDER THE BAND PHOTO TO
GIVE JOURNALISTS A POINT OF REFERENCE. Many publications publish photos with all band
members’ names from left to right to save the writers the trouble of having to ask for the names.

4 INCLUDE YOUR ALBUM COVER & ADDITIONAL ARTWORK. You also want to make sure you include your cover
art in both hi res and lo res (jpg format). This way if your CD is being reviewed, the reviewer can download
the artwork to add to the review. If you have additional assets like band logos or graphics add them here as well.

5 INCLUDE PRESS CLIPS OR FAN TESTIMONIALS IF YOU HAVE THEM. What you say about you is one
thing… However, what others say about you is trusted in a different way. So, if you have articles
that were written about you or great quotes to add from fans – do it! (If you don’t, just ask your fans to
contribute to your site — they will be happy to do so.)

FINAL TIP: Sonicbids is a fabulous place to build and maintain a perfect press kit and you won’t need a
web designer to help you — so build your perfect press kit there, link to it and VOILA!

What’s the best advice I can give a band or artist? Be professional. Have a good looking, simple
press kit, a good (short) demo that truly reflects what you’re about musically, present yourself
in a courteous way that indicates that you realize that there are thousands of other artists in line
behind you, waiting for a shot.
– Bruce Iglauer
76 BAND:SMART

Writing A Great Press Release

Christo Ruppenthal
High quality, compelling content is an important part of writing for promotional purposes.
When it comes to press releases, using the appropriate layout and style is just as important! For
your press releases to be viewed as credible sources of information it is essential to create them
using the correct format.

While some publications re-write their news, many local papers and websites will simply cut and
paste your writing into their publication (sometimes with added intros) or read directly from the
press release to announce your news. Be sure to keep that in mind when writing your release.

The standard format for writing press releases is not difficult or complicated. Simply
include the necessary information below in order, as follows:

Start your release with “For Immediate Release”

Headline: Write a headline that is short, simple, and to the point. No longer than
175 characters. The primary points for the release should be included. You might try
to include a creative hook to inspire your reader to look further.

Summary: The first paragraph should briefly explain the main point of the release.
include why the information provided is relevant and newsworthy. Be short and to
the point. You will have more room to explain the details later in the body section.
The summary should be italicized.

Date & Location: The opening paragraph of the release should begin with the City
and State where the business (band, artist, etc…) is located, and the date the news
release is being made public using the month, day, and year format. Add in the day
of the week.

Body: The body of a press release consists of two or three paragraphs maximum.
Single-spaced and separated with one blank line between. Each paragraph should be
focused on one idea and have only a few sentences.

Band Bio/Artist Information: A standard paragraph that contains a short, factual overview of the band,
artist, etc. Use your band’s “elevator pitch” or a very brief bio here if you have one or two spectacular press
quotes or endorsements put them at the end of the body on their own line and cite their source.

Contact Info: Here is where you provide information about how readers can contact you or your representative
for further information. Include the name(s) of the appropriate contacts along with telephone number; email
address; Facebook and Twitter handles. Also be sure the URL for the band or artist’s website is included.
 Chapter 7 | PRESS KITS & PR 77

THE PRINCIPLES of good pr

Wendy Brynford-Jones
As of this writing, I have worked in the music business for over 20 years,
primarily in public relations. When I started in the business, we didn’t have
websites. America Online was still in its infancy during my second job at
Alias Records and I worked on a very oddly shaped and slow computer
known as a Mac. IRC stood for internet relay chat and it preceded the
instant messengers we know and love today. You had to dial in from a home
computer to a University to chat in real time with friends. It was the Wild
West, people. When bands toured, we faxed press releases. Our writer and
editor databases were written or typed on Rolodex cards. We called people
and developed relationships with media over the phone. Once upon a time,
dear reader, we had large chain record stores around the country called Tower Records and Sam Goody. Those
retailers published beautiful and free four color monthly magazines called Pulse and Request, respectively.
Then the Internet took over and the kindergarten days of yore were smashed. Well, not really or at least not
immediately. I am not here to wax nostalgic about the good old days. If I were here to do that, I’d be getting
into discussions of payola, coke and hookers – the real good old days of major record label promotion. So
let’s leave this brief digression and get into the now and pay attention — the players change, the principles
do not. It is my intention to explain the principles of good PR which I don’t think have changed since the
70s or 80s. I have seen dozens of wonderful magazines, fanzines, daily newspapers and websites fold. It is
not so important to focus on the current major players of the media world because those are always subject
to change. Although Rolling Stone has been around for years, I cannot guarantee you that it will be your top
target in the print world in five or ten years’ time.

Without further ado, let’s get to those nine important principles.

1 WHO IS YOUR AUDIENCE? KNOW YOUR MEDIA TARGETS. I know you are brilliant, sound unique and are
absolutely fantastic. Your sound has massive appeal to everyone so why not target them all? Reality check.

YOU AREN’T THE BEATLES.

At least not yet. So I recommend you take a poll outside of the band or yourself, including your nearest and
dearest and get a sense of who your audience is. Is it college kids or hard rock fans? Soccer moms or hipster
National Public Radio listeners? If your music falls under the category of very esoteric minimalist electronic
instrumental rock, you may not want to target print or web outlets that cater to avid concert going college
kids if you are not planning on touring. I am not suggesting that you not aim high with your media targets,
just know what sort of music they are apt to cover and if you might be a potential fit. This leads us to our
next principle, which is…

2 PROPER RESEARCH. Researching is critical and will become your best friend as you embark on this PR
journey. The good news and the bad news is that it never ends. Just as there are wonderfully creative
people like you making music every day and wanting to share it, likewise there are new publications popping
78 BAND:SMART

up constantly. Those media entrepreneurs, large and small, want to expose others to upcoming and well-
known musical artists. As times have changed most of these outlets tend to fall on the digital side in the form
of websites and blogs but you will periodically see back to the future type visionaries who actually start print
magazines. God bless those who want to keep print alive! Nothing smells quite like a magazine or newspaper.
Trust me, go to the newstand and take a whiff.

THERE ARE NEW PUBLICATIONS POPPING UP CONSTANTLY

For those of you who are performing locally and regionally, it’s a very good idea to familiarize yourself with
the alternative weeklies, websites, and daily writers in the cities and towns in which you are based and tour.
Also note which writers are writing about whom. Don’t send your power pop band’s music to the writer
who focuses on hip hop. If you fancy yourself in the vein of Bruce Springsteen, note who reviewed his latest
album or a similar male artist. Oftentimes people who write music reviews or features are not on the staff
of the publication. They are called freelancer writers, freelancers, contributors or stringers. Thanks to the
web, you now have many ways of attempting to contact them at your disposal. You might simply do a web
search for their name or search for them on social media sites and send a polite note. Of course you will
always want to check the front of book or masthead of print publications to find out who the music or arts
and entertainment editor is. Editors generally assign pieces to writers but they also rely upon these freelance
writers to tell them what is cool and should be getting ink.

A simple way for you to research regional publications if you are planning a tour is to enter a phrase such
as “list of San Francisco media outlets” into your favorite search engine such as Google or Yahoo. Many
music focused websites and blogs provide links to other websites, which can be tremendously useful for your
researching.

3 KNOW WHAT IS NEWS-WORTHY. I may differ from some of my peers in the sense that I do not like to
bombard media people with press releases for every possible thing. New albums, videos and tours are
what I deem newsworthy. If you are not yet an established band in the media, a personnel line-up change is
not newsworthy in my opinion unless it is piggy backed onto one of the previously mentioned items such as
new music or tour dates. If you are constantly sending out press releases, it seems like spam and when you do
have something useful to share, it runs the risk of getting overlooked or ignored.

4 BREVITY AND ACCURACY. Admittedly I have been guilty of run on sentences and other crimes, and
because of this I want to stress the importance of imparting what you need to say in a well written,
brief and accurate fashion. When I worked in promotions and marketing for Launch/Yahoo I had two piles
on my desk. One was for CDs; the other was for the accompanying press
materials – bio, clips, photos, etc. I did not want to take the time to read
through a several page bio. If I needed to look at it after I heard the music,
I would dig for it in the pile. Great filing system, eh? But seriously, I was far
If you are constantly sending more likely to view a simple double sided one page bio before dumping it
out press releases, it seems into the pile than a bunch of papers.
like spam. When you do have
something useful to share, IF A SENTENCE LOOKS TOO WORDY TO YOU,
it runs the risk of getting
overlooked or ignored.
MOST LIKELY IT IS.
 Chapter 7 | PRESS KITS & PR 79

Be an editor — go in, think about the key points you need to address, and chop away the fat. Think about
your songwriting and recording process in which you need to trim things down to get to the core.

Be accurate — always spell check things but also read them first. I have a tendency to read too quickly and
miss things, so I read, spell check and then read again. Nothing says amateur more quickly than misspelled
editor and writer names on addressed packages or grammatical or spelling errors in your press materials. As
the adage goes, you only get one chance to make a first impression. Remember you are dealing with media
people, who likely don’t have much patience for written errors as they are always editing and correcting. Even
if you are dealing with Joe Blow blog, who may have typos on his website, put your best foot forward with
your approach and be professional. Let the blogger make the errors, not you. This isn’t just your hobby; this
is your expression of self and your career.

NOTHING SAYS AMATEUR MORE QUICKLY THAN MISSPELLED EDITOR Your goal should be
AND WRITER NAMES ON ADDRESSED PACKAGES OR GRAMMATICAL OR quality, not quantity.
SPELLING ERRORS IN YOUR PRESS MATERIALS.

5 ETIQUETTE AND THE PROFESSIONAL APPROACH. Be professional yet not overly stuffy or awkward. For
those of you who have worked in corporate offices who observed casual Fridays, you would not show up
to work with your stained or torn jeans. Nor would they be ironed with creases in them, right? Let’s say you
are making a first attempt at contact with Steven Goldman, music editor at X publication or website. Calling
him Mr. Goldman sounds too formal but writing Dear Steve would be too casual. Use the name Steven and
briefly explain in your email or phone message why you are contacting him. I only joke around with writers
or editors whom I have known for a long time. Email can often be misconstrued and again, you are trying
to make a good first impression. Always thank people for their time and consideration and if you do receive
coverage or even brief responses to your calls or emails, let them know you appreciate it.

6 RELATIONSHIP BUILDING — THE FINE LINE BETWEEN PERSISTENCE AND ANNOYANCE. Editors and
writers are busier today than they ever have been. It is not unusual to get someone’s voicemail and
for him or her to say “the easiest way to reach me is via email,” that they don’t check their voicemail box
frequently or even “don’t leave messages here.” Obviously we want to respect people’s wishes as to how we
contact them. I recommend your first attempt at reaching media people to be via email. A typical method I
use when working on behalf of my clients might be to email twice, and to call the third time. If the voicemail
says email preferred I leave a message saying that I am following up on the email I have sent regarding X.
If someone answers the phone and sounds cranky, silently take a breath, smile, and quickly state your name
and ask if he or she has just a minute. Then offer to send the information via email and thank them for their
time. It has always baffled me why people who don’t want to answer their phones do and sound like they
want to murder the caller but I try not to take it personally. I am doing my job, they are doing theirs and it’s
unfortunate we don’t always encounter mutual politeness on our paths but that’s showbiz.

You do need to realize that at some point when you get no response whatsoever, generally after the fourth
or fifth attempt at contact that it’s time to quit. This is the line between persistence and annoyance. I rarely
leave more than one or two phone messages for a media person because when I am at that stage, emails have
already been sent and not responded to.
80 BAND:SMART

When you do get an interested party which would be an email back or a promise to listen to your music,
show your appreciation and give them a week and then get back to them. If you are calling a writer in
Philadelphia and the Phillies are having a good season, by all means, bring it up. If someone answers and
sounds friendly and they have a nice voice, feel free to say something like “hey, you have such a good voice.
Have you ever done radio?” Try to make conversation. If the correspondence is via email and you’ve never
played the venue in their town, ask the writer if they like the place or what the house drink special is. Ask
about local attractions or good restaurants in the area. Use your best judgment and go with the flow. If you
can, make things personal, light and fun. Show them who you are and have a good time. Yes, PR is serious
business but this is the music business, not corporate finance. People in music do have interests and hobbies
outside of music.

7 ETHICS, HONESTY. Be yourself. Don’t try to be someone you are not. If your cousin thinks that your band
sounds like Maroon 5 but she’s actually a bit tone deaf and no one else has ever heard or seen that, it’s
probably best to leave comparisons of your band to them out.

BE YOURSELF. DON’T TRY TO BE SOMEONE YOU ARE NOT.

If your lead time to solicit coverage in local media is less than optimal (this would be less than four to five weeks
for a weekly publication, for example), be upfront about it. It doesn’t matter if the date was confirmed late with the
venue or you screwed up and didn’t send out information in time, be honest. Tell the media outlets you are aware
that this is less than ideal notification but you are hoping they might consider a plug (mention) for your show.
Make it easy for them and provide links for artwork, music streaming and other information.

If you know the musicians performing on your bill sound like wailing cats, keep it to yourself.

8 FOLLOW UP! FOLLOW UP! FOLLOW UP! Next to research, this is the principle which must be burned onto
your brain and inside your eyelids. You can lose many opportunities by not maintaining great organizational
skills and following up with media, particularly those who have even remotely expressed interest.

When I worked at Virgin Records, my boss got us into the excellent habit of furnishing weekly
reports which were status updates on projects. It is a practice I have maintained to this day and
I know my clients appreciate it. They can see the good, the bad and the ugly. People need to
know what is confirmed, what is pending (meaning what stands a shot of coming to fruition
Don’t badmouth others
for coverage), who is being pitched and who has passed. It is concrete evidence of PR efforts.
to build yourself up.
PR is a gamble, it’s a crapshoot. It is about effort, not results. As with most things in life, you
cannot control outcomes or results but you can control your actions and your approach. You
can be organized and disciplined. I suggest you keep a document of your publicity efforts and
update it daily.

9 POSITIVE MENTAL ATTITUDE / LEGGO THAT EGO. Competition is at an all-time high. Media outlets,
depending upon their size and reach, are receiving dozens to hundreds of packages per week related
to music. I have experienced the disappointments and hurts of working with very talented people and not
always getting the results they or I hoped for. I have worked with neurotic artists who focused on the negative
review when they had several positive ones to balance it. I had a manager scream at me that my relationships
were useless and that I was ineffective because he didn’t feel I acquired enough coverage for his client. When
 Chapter 7 | PRESS KITS & PR 81

I tried to explain that not everyone will choose to cover an act he yelled louder. I nearly let this jerk’s rant
deprive me of my years of hard work, effort and a pure heart. A wise woman once told me that just because
someone calls you a chair, it doesn’t mean you are a chair.

Please do not give up. Maintain your positive mental attitude and believe in yourself. Don’t take things
personally. On a lighter note, don’t forget that opinions are like butts – everyone’s got one and they all stink.
Your ego will shout, how dare they ignore me? How dare they not cover me? Don’t give up. You haven’t found
your media kindred spirits yet. They are out there. If you have the talent and the persistence you will find
them. Stay focused and keep working.

Not everyone will get reviewed in the glossy national publications or most trafficked websites but you can
still acquire fans and share your music with people who will appreciate it. Sure it’s a great buzz when you get
that mention or plug in that big name site or print outlet but remember it’s temporary. It is all part of the
ongoing, ever changing stream: your life, your art and your passion.

Think about why you got into music — was it to become rich and famous or to find your life partner? Was it
because you wanted to carry your message to others or to not be a doctor like the rest of your family? What
it all comes down to is you got into this art form for yourself. It’s icing on the cake if others appreciate your
work. At the end of the day, what's in your soul is what counts. Review or no review, feature or no feature, tell
the ego to shut up and keep following your muse.
82 BAND:SMART

for bands that are putting

together a Press Kit to Submit
for a Festival
Jerry fink
Do...
• Understand that anyone you send this too is going to be busy
• Read submission rules BEFORE submitting
• Include samples of your music
• Put your best song first
• Include any press you’ve received
• Use proper grammar
• Keep your calendar updated
• Keep your bio short and to the point
• Include pictures that show your face
• Stand out… in a good way
• BE PATIENT

Don’t...
• Include songs with long intro’s before lyrics
• Include your entire album
• Include broken links in an EPK
• Give your life history in the bio
• Include video with poor audio/visual quality (great for YouTube, not your press kit)
• Leave out any special requirements you have
• Embellish or lie (It’s easy to figure out)
• Compare yourself to other artists (Influences are ok, but I highly doubt you sound
like U2 or Alice in Chains)
 Chapter 7 | PRESS KITS & PR 83

If your music sucks, go ahead and give me a demo on a dirty, burned CD with your name misspelled in Sharpie. If your
music is better than that, your presentation should be too.

You can, and should, challenge the expected. But, much like with your music, if you push too far from what is currently
done, in a way that is too different than what is currently done, you will alienate any potential buyers. You should not be like
everyone else, but you cannot be so foreign that you no longer fit. Give them what they expect, in a way they don’t expect it.

Remember that you are one of millions of bands trying to make it. Most industry people are tired of hearing the sob story,
the I REALLY WANT IT story, the “lost my gear in a storm” story, and just about any other story you can come up with.
Tell me a real story. And do it over coffee (that you pay for), or in a note that you paint on the side of your garage and take
a video of, or some other bizarre way.
– Joanna Quargnali-Linsley

If there is one thing which unites journalists, promoters, labels or anyone else working in the business, it is a hatred for
impersonal generic messages. Why expect someone to check out your band if you can’t be bothered to take 30 seconds
to type in their name? I guarantee you will have a better response if you send out 20 personal emails than 100 mass
messages. If in doubt, just consider when you last responded to an email inviting you to have your penis extended or your
breasts augmented.

- Olaf Furniss

When your message starts, “To Whom It May Concern,” it doesn’t.

– Martin Atkins
84 BAND:SMART
 Getting a Gig

Photo: Daniel Robert

The advice I have for this section pisses me off a bit just to type the words and I hope it doesn’t confuse you — it’s this, be
cautious. This goes against most everything you’ll see throughout here and the very idea of being in a band BUT – if you
think you can get 100 people to your show — find a venue that holds 50.

If you think you can fill a club on your own, find two other artists that can, too.

If you think you can sell out at a $10 ticket, then half that.

If you think you have this down and you only need three weeks to promote the hell out of your show, allow six.

This kind of caution leads to sold out shows, full venues, happy, smiling, sweaty faces — and possibilities.

Making your show an event is another flexible equation. The things you have done that have worked will only work next
time with different substance. Timetables and templates will work but you need to be aware of constantly surprising and
amazing your fans. Change it up, take some careful risks. After all the only risk is not taking one!

85
86 BAND:SMART

We can talk about touring — but really, if you are thinking about this seriously you should drop $19.99
on Tour:Smart. There’s some pretty good advice in there.

WHY ARE SHOWS IMPORTANT ANYWAY?

Oh, so many reasons. You get better, you get instant unquestionable feedback from the audience —
ie: they leave if you are terrible.

On-stage time is worth at least 5x rehearsal time. Any lessons learnt are burned deeper into the adrenalized
cortex.

It is the place you distribute your vibe and your music and your merch. You get to look into the faces
of your fans. You will feel a confused eyebrow — your inner bomb sniffing dog will just know when the
energy leaves the room. In the uphill climb of all of the details that go into making this happen — the
show is the highest.

It is when you stop talking and start doing — the poetry takes over or it doesn’t.

Things become obvious if you are looking.

First impressions
cathy dethmers
First, present your band as professionally as you can — meaning you should have a web
presence, have at least two songs that are decently recorded, and have a concise band bio
that quickly conveys to the promoter what your band is all about. Think of trying to get
a show like trying to get a job — first impressions are very important. You need to get a
promoter to take the time to listen to your music and honestly consider you for a show, and
that’s not likely to happen if the promoter has to try too hard to figure out who you are.

FIRST IMPRESSIONS ARE VERY IMPORTANT.

Second, make connections with other local bands right out of the gate — you are more
likely to get a first-time show if you can package your band with another band that is
already familiar to the promoter. This is also a good way to get your band in front of some music fans that
might be predisposed to like your music. Going out and regularly supporting local music is a great way to
make these kinds of connections with other musicians, and may ultimately result in some good-will word
of mouth marketing for your band by those you’ve befriended

You only get one chance to

make a first impression.
 Chapter 8 | GETTING A GIG 87

booking strategy
kevin breuner
Getting your band booked in the local club scene can be a challenging task to say the
least. It’s hard enough to get your email or press pack noticed by the club booker, but once
you get your foot in the door, there are still numerous factors that can dictate whether or
not you actually get a gig. It’s time to get strategic!

1 GET FAMILIAR WITH THE VENUE’S CALENDAR. Most clubs are meticulous with their
calendar (which are usually posted online). Start looking for specific clues. Do they
have a standard number of bands on the bill every night? Is there a night where they tend
to give new bands a shot?

2 LOOK FOR HOLES IN THE SCHEDULE. Once you pick up on a club’s booking patterns,
you can start finding holes in their schedule where they are in need of a band.

3 MAKE SURE YOUR MUSIC IS A MATCH. Narrow it down to the shows where your music is a true fit (time
to be honest folks!).

4 TARGET THAT SPECIFIC SHOW IN YOUR EMAIL PITCH. Now you are prepared to approach the club
booker in a way that helps them out! Just put the show name and date in the subject line of your email
and politely let them know that you would be a good fit to round out that bill (Keep the email brief !). The
chances of getting a response to your email, and better yet a gig, just went way up!

REMEMBER: Booking a club is a tough job, and the club booker is always happy to solidify a show and get
it off their plate. When you approach them in a way that helps them out, you’ll see results. If you constantly
spam them wanting to play dates that are already filled on their calendar, then you will never be taken
seriously. It can take a long time for a new band to a get a crack at a highly regarded venue/club. That is, if
you do what every other band does and expect the club booker to do all the work for you.

INSTEAD, STOP LOOKING TO THEM TO SOLVE YOUR BOOKING PROBLEMS AND

START THINKING ABOUT HOW YOUR BAND CAN HELP THEM OUT.
That’s what my band (Hello Morning) did, and we consistently get asked, “How do you keep getting those
gigs?” Now you know the secret!

DoubleDoor: Local bands: We love you, but

you can't all play third.
88 BAND:SMART

what a promoter wants to

hear to book you
dan steinberg
• Our label will do a ticket buy
• We are worth 150+ tickets in your town (and really mean it).
• We will play for free.
• We have the guy from “The OC” in our band.
• We are getting air play in your town.
• We will buy our own pizza.
• We will be buying ads to support the date.
• We will hand out flyers everywhere in town.
• We want to show you we can draw a crowd, give us a shot on an off night.
• Our music is selling in your city.

Retain the audience – It’s not ANNOYING THINGS THAT BANDS DO

just how many visitors that Bands that leave gear behind. This happens at least several times each week and then we get
turn up at 8pm that matters, the deluge of frantic phone calls in the following days about have you seen this or that piece
it’s how many that turn up at of equipment and on the phone act like we should know where their stuff is. It’s amazing
8pm, and stay until 4am. how something that is so important to them the next day gets so carelessly left behind the
night before. Keep track of your stuff and take it with you when you leave!
– Marcus Taylor - Creepy Crawl

Tony Maimone of the legendary Cleveland dada-rockers Pere Ubu gave the Mekons a hugely valuable piece of advice back in 1991. “Guys,
there’s only two things you have to remember. Get the money and don’t leave anything behind.” Truer words were never spoken. I even turned
it into the chorus of a song I recorded with the hardest working touring band in modern rock The Sadies. I have lived by these words for the last
20 or so years.
– Jon Langford
 Chapter 8 | GETTING A GIG 89

3 things every band should know

joshua liston

1 SELL THE BENEFIT TO THE VENUE, NOT YOUR OWN MUSICAL BRILLIANCE!
Nearly all venues will take a half decent down-to-earth band that’s got a great
promotional ethos over a greater band, that either can’t pull a crowd or doesn’t bother
trying!

2 DON’T BOTHER CALLING AND CALLING UNTIL YOU HAVE RECEIVED THAT
POSITIVE FIRST RETURN EMAIL. Give a venue booker time to develop an
understanding of your act before you call. Don’t forget to call as soon as you get
that reply email, that's the time when the booker will be most receptive to your gig
proposal and most likely to remember your sound/bio and vibe. Oh yeah, and don’t
forget to add the venue on Facebook and or Twitter well before you email to gain an
understanding of the venues own web presence and activity.

3 NEVER OVERSTATE YOUR PULLING POWER! This is a MASSIVE mistake! Ask

every venue booker “what’s the minimum number of people we need to get in
to secure our spot on a particular nights bill” and assure him or her you can get those
numbers. Then work extra/extra hard to exceed that minimum requirement. If you
overstate your pulling power you most likely not be re-booked.

I am an extraordinarily nice person when it comes to bands. I think most bands realize that with me getting 1000+ emails
a week and having to listen to all those bands and reply, things can be slow when it comes to getting back to people. This
one band though, ugh. I’ve booked them twice since December and both times they have sent me rude, snarky emails about
how it takes a couple days to get back to them. Today they asked if they could talk to my manager because I told them I had
no dates to offer them right now. Not only that but last time they played, they started a bunch of stuff with the other bands
so I’m in no hurry to bring them back. I finally told them I was cutting them off and not booking them anymore and I cc’d
the owner and my partner. Man, they know that if a band antagonizes ME into blacklisting them, they gotta be trouble!
- Elle Quintana
90 BAND:SMART

3 SIGNS THAT THE BAND WILL BRING NO ONE TO THE SHOW

1. 2 Weeks before the show they say, “We’re gonna pack your place!”

2. 1 Week before the show they ask, “What’s your capacity?”

3. Upon arriving at the gig they ask, “So how many people do YOU usually get on a Wednesday night?”

3 THINGS ALL VENUE BOOKERS LOVE TO HEAR

1. We’ve spoken to heaps of local bands and music fans in your area and they’re telling us that our style of music would suit
your venue; and also the way we like to promote our shows would compliment the way you promote your venue.

2. We have already checked out and spoken to several quality local bands in your area that are very keen to play the show
if it goes ahead.

3. What can we do to make the show the best it can be if it goes ahead and what actions can we take closer to show-day to
really ramp things up for a Big Night?

3 THINGS ALL VENUE BOOKERS HATE HEARING FROM BANDS

1. We’re massively HUGE in this town/city ............ or otherwise known as somewhere else completely; or We’re
GIGANTIC on Facebook.

2. Do you know any good local bands that might want to open for us?

3. Ok so you’re booked out that night, well which other venues have live bands in your town on those nights? And do you
have their contact information?

Q: How often should you contact a venue to get a touring gig?

A: It’s a fine line between contacting, following up and stalking. Make sure that you have good relevant information to your
promoter – like, we play to 85 people a night usually, and although we have never been to Chattanooga, after this first slot
opening up for ______, we will be a great resource for you promoting other national shows…

ALSO — make sure you say “We don’t need anything from you except the opportunity to perform, win over more fans and prove
to you we are worthy of this opportunity.” You don’t need to pester anyone about “how many cases of beer do we get???” NONE!
- Martin Atkins

“If you’re a local artist trying to get your first gig at a local venue, don’t call them and ask for a specific date; you’ll have a lot
more success telling them you’re looking for a show in October, versus a show on October 22. Asking to play on a specific
date is a yes or no question, most likely a no; you increase your odds by giving the club the ability to slot you in where it
works best for them.”

– Mike Bailey
 Chapter 8 | GETTING A GIG 91

how TO GET a show for the first time

T:S

ramona downey and ursula rodriguez

THE GROUND RULES:
Do not send a demo unless it has been requested. The Bottom of the Hill has no “foot traffic.” No
one comes to the club except to see the bands. You should feel very confident that 40 to 50 people
would come to see your band on a Monday night. If you don’t feel that’s the case, you should wait a
bit before playing this particular club. You shouldn’t be in a big hurry to play to nobody, and that’s
what happens if you play before you’re ready. Until then, be patient. When you play B.O.T.H. for
the first time, you are making a statement about your band.

YOU SHOULDN’T BE IN A BIG HURRY TO

PLAY TO NOBODY, AND THAT’S WHAT HAPPENS
IF YOU PLAY BEFORE YOU’RE READY.
These are some things we would be looking at:

1. What does your music sound like live?

2. What size crowd do you draw?
3. What kinds of people come to your shows?
4. What other bands are you friends with or do you go well with?
5. How easy are you to work with?
6. How loud do you play?

When we put together a show for your first time, we’re trying to get a good vibe going.
You should establish a rapport with other bands and musicians.

BUILD YOURSELF A NAME FIRST

How do you do that? Start small. Play the smaller clubs and start a mailing list. Target
your audience. Figure out who is likely to like your stuff and concentrate on those
types of events. When you start getting shows, play the room. You won’t do anyone any favors by blowing
their eardrums while keeping your integrity intact. Start small. Play the smaller clubs and start a mailing list.

SHOULD I TAKE ANY SHOW THAT’S OFFERED TO ME?

No. Be smart about the shows you take. Realize that more is going on than just a show being played. You are
being associated in the minds of the audience with the other bands on the bill and with the venue.

Encourage your crowd to come early to see the opener or stay after your set to watch the next band.

T:S
Originally appeared in Tour:Smart
92 BAND:SMART

ONCE WE’VE PLAYED THERE AND DONE WELL, WHAT’S THE NEXT STEP?
The next step is to do it again under slightly different circumstances, a bit later in the week, with a different
band or two perhaps. Keep in mind that no one plays the Bottom of the Hill every month, so it’s important
to use some strategy when you plan a show.

IF YOU AGREE TO PLAY A SHOW AT THE BOTTOM OF THE HILL,

YOU SHOULD NOT HAVE ANY OTHER LOCAL SHOWS AT LEAST
TWO WEEKS PRIOR TO THE SHOW AND ONE WEEK AFTER.
Specifically, this means two weekends before and one weekend after. Many times, we have seen bands announce
to an empty room: “Um... this is our last song... come see us at the Boomerang this Friday.” Could the fact of
having another gig in just a few days have something to do with the fact that no one came to your show?

WHEN CAN I CONSIDER A SHOW CONFIRMED?

Many times when you call for a show, the bookers will give you a tentative date saying something like: “why
don’t we shoot for the third? You ask the other people involved and I’ll make sure the date is clear and we’ll
talk again to confirm it.” That is not a confirmed show. We don’t consider a show confirmed until we have
discussed the full bill (opener, support, and headliner), load in/sound-check/set times, what each band can
expect to be paid, and what the ticket price will be. Please make sure you have talked in person with one of
our bookers to confirm your show. Phone messages aren’t reliable.

When you confirm a show with us make sure you know the following things:

• Date of your show • What your payment is

• Ticket price • What the bar telephone number is in case of emergency
• Load-in time • How to get to the Bottom of the Hill
• Sound check time

When we confirm a show with you, you also need to tell us how many people are in your band, roughly what
the stage plot is (typically “guitar, bass, drums with two vocal mikes up front”), and any special arrangements
you will need for your set (i.e. “we’re sharing a drum kit with the opening band” or “we need a direct box for
our Electric Latrinophone”).

Under promise. Over deliver.

Follow up and keep your word. If you haven’t already discovered, most musicians are flakes (not the snowflake avalanche-y
kind). They’re late. They say they’re going to do something, and that something is out of a musician’s mind right after saying
it. They tell a club they can bring 100 people and only 10 show up.
– Chris Seth Jackson
 Chapter 8 | GETTING A GIG 93

things bands can do to

book more shows
chris bracco
GO WATCH OTHER BANDS THAT SOUND LIKE YOU.
If there are any bands in your area with large followings, get out to a couple shows
and become friends. Do them a favor, like designing a website, flyer, banner, etc. The
harder you work for a band bigger than your band, and the more respectful you are
to them and their efforts, the more likely they will consider you for an opening slot.

WHERE TO FIND A GIG

FIND PLACES WHERE BANDS SIMILAR TO YOU PLAY

Use ReverbNation’s “Gig Finder” to figure out where bands are getting booked in your area. However,
emailing clubs with your RPK or EPK usually won’t get any results, because many of these venues have yet
to claim their venue pages on ReverbNation. Instead, after finding some good places, print out your press
kit and mail it to them, or better yet, personally drop it off in a nice professional package along with a CD
to any decision maker at the club. Follow up with a call within a couple of days so you stay fresh in their
minds. If the decision maker has an assistant, get to know that person and you will find that it will be much
easier to get in the door.

PLAY BY THEIR RULES

Do a gig swap! If you have a respectable following or are an up and coming band, use sites like
indieonthemove.com and splitgigs.com to trade and share gigs with other bands who might want to break into
your market.

COLLABORATION IS KEY TO SUCCESS IN TODAY’S FRAGMENTED MUSIC INDUSTRY.

Get creative. Write up a proposal and present it to the appropriate person at your local school board,
offering to do a series of free shows to raise money for the school athletic or band program.
94 BAND:SMART
 BOX

YOU

Outside the box

Photo: Samuel Zeller

NEVERMIND THINKING OUTSIDE THE BOX… THINK OUTSIDE THE VENUE!

Maybe the real opportunity is outside the venue at a sold out show where everyone is still standing in line. What would
happen if you offered a cup of hot chocolate in return for an email address and a quick listen to your music? Sure, you get
a few [email protected] in there. But, you’d also get some very positive results. Switch this around to suit the local climate
— weather wise, economy wise, vibe wise. In Arizona in the middle of summer, substitute cold water and a spray bottle for
hot chocolate. People will cheer! People will wave to get your attention rather than hiding their faces and running away.

The idea of house concerts seems particularly huge for certain genres and adaptable for others. There are great pieces in
here from Fran Snyder and Shannon Curtis about this valuable new alternative. Rock it!

95
96 BAND:SMART

House Concerts with Mike Doughty

 Chapter 09 | OUTSIDE THE BOX 97

house concerts
Fran Snyder
Mozart was onto something.

Mozart was well known for performing “parlor concerts” in the homes of rich patrons
who would delight in the opportunity to show off their acquaintance with him. Things
have changed, however, and you no longer need to be rich to have access to some of
the finest talent available. Furthermore, many of these artists are genuinely interested
in their fans, and enjoy an opportunity to connect in a way that rarely happens in
traditional venues.

BREAKING NEW MARKETS = BREAKING THE BANK

Most acts, regardless of talent, are lucky to draw 30-40 people when they play in a new area. The resources
needed to get beyond those numbers are getting more expensive and less effective all the time. Publicity and
radio promotion can cost many hundreds if not thousands of dollars per week, and these methods employ
people to beg, bribe, or cajole overwhelmed media personnel (writers, DJs, music programmers) who can rarely
make the returns worthwhile. Ask any act how many “butts in seats” result from a nice article in the paper:
few, if any. Likewise, airplay doesn’t yield much unless it is sustained. Posters and flyers? Don’t get me started.

PLAY ROOMS YOU CAN FILL. PLAY ROOMS WHERE YOU CAN CONNECT.
The best way to build an audience is to play rooms: 1) You can fill, and 2) That allow you to really connect
in a personal or powerful way with the audience.

But where are the rooms you can sell out with 40 seats? Specifically, where are the ones that don’t have an
espresso machine screaming during your ballads?

Shrinkage!

The potential audience for live music in traditional venues continues to shrink and fragment. People have
more choices than ever for entertainment, at home. on-demand movies, Xbox and Wii, and the increasing
variety of sports events and programming provide serious competition to the concert business.

In addition, despite the good they’ve done for society, stricter DUI laws have reduced the number of people
who go out to listen to music, and smoking bans force “would-be listeners” out of the room during the show.
We now have 200 capacity clubs who routinely have 50 people show up, and a majority of the audience
spends half the night outside.

So venues have to diversify to stay in business.

Pool tables, televisions, electronic trivia, anything to bring in more bodies and sell more drinks. They have
to do this, regardless of how it affects (distracts) from the live music shows. Artists (who seemingly have no
better option) gladly walk in, set up, and waste their evening playing for ungrateful, inattentive patrons, and
force their true fans to watch a show while drunks are screaming about the latest touchdown.
98 BAND:SMART

And everyone accepts it. That’s life.

How can we have profitable concerts with an audience of 30-40 people? You create an event that is so special
that one person (the venue) is willing to let the other (the act) keep all the money. Who would do such a
thing? A house concert host.

WHAT IS A HOUSE CONCERT?

It’s an invitation-only concert in someone’s home, presented by a host who does not profit from the event.
Although there are many exceptions and variations from these guidelines, house concerts are usually…
• held indoors and on weekends
• attended by 20-50 people
• paid for by a $10-20 donation per guest (for the performer)
• known to include light snacks, beverages or a pot-luck dinner
• attended by the host’s friends, neighbors, co-workers, and maybe a few fans of the artist
• attended by a 25-60 age group
• performed by solos, duos and small groups
• performed with little to no amplification
• very intimate - the audiences sit close and are attentive
• performed as two, 40-minute sets with a 20 minute break
• stronger merchandise sales than traditional venues
• booked without a financial guarantee (sometimes a modest guarantee to cover expenses)
• known to house and feed the artist for the night

THE GROWTH OF HOUSE CONCERTS

Due to space considerations, these house concerts are more likely to help singer-songwriter acts and small
ensembles, but the variety of genres and spaces available continues to grow. Jazz combos, instrumental acts,
or any act that can comfortably fit in a living room might really enjoy performing in these intimate spaces.

ARE HOUSE CONCERTS THE PERFECT PILL?

Even a modest turnout (15-20 people) can be very satisfying, profitable, and not leave the artist scrambling
for a hotel at the end of the night. Many house concert hosts provide food and a guest room for the night -
two of the biggest expenses of being on the road.

REBUILDING OUR “INFRASTRUCTURE”

Never before in our history has there been so much talent available, yet so much of that talent is “stuck.”
There are not enough venues where small successes are possible - places that are the necessary stepping
stones for an artist building a regional or national fan base. Necessity is the mother of invention, and the
development of new house concerts, by enthusiastic and savvy fans, is necessary — always has been. Just ask
Mozart.
 Chapter 09 | OUTSIDE THE BOX 99

How I Made $25K On A 2-Month

House Concert Tour (And How
You Can Too)
Shannon Curtis
Excerpt from: NO BOOKER, NO BOUNCER, NO BARTENDER

WHY ARE HOUSE CONCERTS AWESOME?

HARD NUMBERS: On my 2nd-ever house concert tour, we did 50 shows, added 500
names to my email list, averaged $500 of income every night, sold 700 CDs, 250 tees
and totes, grossed $25,000. Boom. (Oh and the following year, our numbers were up
20%; and the year after that, they were up another 15%.)

BOOKING IS EASY-PEASY: No emailing a booker 5 times and getting no response; your

hosts are eager to have you and they actually email back!

NO SHOW PROMOTION: You heard me. All the guests are there by invitation of your
host. By inviting THEIR friends and neighbors, THEY create a new little market for
you to play every single night.

IT’S A VIRUS: Nearly every show, a guest asks me if they can host a show at their house on the next tour, for
their unique group of friends.

CONNECTION TO THE MAX: House concerts are the most connective kind of performance I’ve ever done.
Guests leave there feeling like they’re a part of what you’re doing. Which is the foundation of this:

Partnership with community:

+ the intimate house concert experience
= deep connection with people
=> long-lasting relationships w/ hyper-dedicated community of supporters

SO HOW DO YOU PUT ON A SUCCESSFUL HOUSE CONCERT?

You need 3 basic things:

HOST: Someone who is a fan of you – they love you, or they love your music, or they love both = awesome!

SPACE: A place where a group can gather & sit for a show – living room, backyard, garage, art studio …

GUESTS: A minimum of 20 adults – friends/neighbors/community of your host, invited by your host

100 BAND:SMART

HELP YOUR HOST PLAN A SUCCESSFUL EVENT:

GUEST LIST: Ask your host to invite double the number of people they hope to have at the show.

ADULTS ONLY, PLEASE: Kids are adorable, but they can break the magic bubble of engagement you want to
create and capitalize on at a house concert. Better engagement = better donations.

THIS IS A “DONATION-BASED CONCERT”: No ticket price, no suggested donation, just invitations asking
guests to come prepared to make a donation to the artist at the conclusion of the show.

GUARANTEE SHOWS: For deep-pocketed supporters who just want to pay you to play… by all means let them!

SETUP & FLOW:

PRE-GAME PREP: Show up on time, fed, dressed, and ready to engage with the host and guests all night; have
soundcheck done and merch set up before the first guest arrives.

SET THE SPACE UP FOR A HOUSE CONCERT, NOT A HOUSE PARTY: It’s not background music at a house
party, so set up the guest seating area to reflect that – gathered in close, all facing the “stage” area.

VOLUME THAT DRAWS THEM IN: Loud enough to be heard clearly, quiet enough make people lean in and
listen.

MERCH TABLE WHERE THEY’LL SEE IT: Visible from the concert area & in a high-traffic area where they’ll
likely pass by after the show.

HAVE GUESTS ARRIVE 1 HOUR BEFORE SHOW TIME: Work the crowd; chat them up while they’re having a
drink or two and getting comfortable in the space => they’ll be on your side before you’ve played a single note.

PLAY YOUR HEART OUT: Bring your A game; play for 20 people like they’re 2,000. Give ‘em a show to
remember.

THE “ASK”: Help your host make a killer donation announcement immediately after you’ve played your last
note. Coach them before the show on what to say – i.e. not “tips,” not “gas money,” these are donations to
express their appreciation for the concert they just experienced. LOTS more detail on this in my book! :)

GO SELL YOUR STUFF: Be at the merch table from the moment the performance ends until the last guest
leaves.
 Chapter 09 | OUTSIDE THE BOX 101

Perform outside the box! Frats, sororities and house

parties will be your best bet on non-weekend nights
since most people (especially in small towns) don’t go
out to bars on Sundays-Wednesdays.
- Matt Bauerschmidt

Food – eating together is one of the coolest parts of doing

house concerts. It’s great to finish the first set, grab a bowl
of veggie chili or some tortilla chips and have a chat with the
audience about what they make of it.
– Steve Lawson

In my experience, having a few house concerts on a tour is refreshing. They

pay better than most clubs, there’s usually food, and sometimes even a
place to stay for the night. Not to mention, your fans will be thrilled to say
you came and played in their house.
Tip: Create a page on your website that explains how house concerts work.
Make it easy for them to prepare for the show, and save yourself the stress
of answering the same questions over and over again.
– Cameron Mizell
102 BAND:SMART

Stay Local!
jon ostrow
While every band hopes to create enough demand that they make their way up the
tour-size ladder, there is a critical first step that gets left behind: touring locally.

As social media gives musicians more access to their fans on a larger scale than
ever before, “grandiose” has become the new ethos. But in reality, these large-scale,
widespread tours are a complete waste of your time if there is no demand in your music
outside of your local turf.

So, just as you’ve had to do so many times before, you will have to make the most with
what you’ve got... and what you’ve got is a local audience that has the potential to be
turned into a loyal fan base. The following is a checklist to help you maximize the
potential of every show:

PLUG YOUR DAMN NAME!

Plugging your own name is a critical part of performing to a new audience. If you are playing to a local crowd,
make sure you plug the band’s name every few songs. This is especially meaningful when playing to a local
crowd, one that will most likely see and/or hear your name brought up in passing conversation, on fliers or
online. And while you’re at it, don’t forget to give a quick mention to your upcoming tour schedule, too.

OFFER EXCLUSIVE DEALS FOR REPEAT ATTENDEES

Offering any sort of exclusives is a great way to give your loyal fans just another reason to continue their loyalty.
Try putting together exclusive offers that create incentive for fans to continue to attend shows on a regular basis.
1) Present last show’s ticket stub for half off the cover of that night’s show
2) Present 2 ticket stubs from current tour and receive $5 off t-shirt
3) Present 5 ticket stubs from current tour and receive exclusive, unreleased EP

DON’T BE A JERK. RUN WITH THE PUNCHES.

No one likes to deal with a jerk, but this rule of thumb becomes critically important when touring in a
local setting, as many of the venue owners, bartenders and even booking staff will know each other and
communicate on a regular basis. You want to avoid the risk of being an outstanding jerk and having all of the
venues in the surrounding towns blacklist you from performing.

This means dealing with a bad soundcheck, not crying about a lack of free beer and, very important, not
putting too many people on the guest list! All of these things can quickly piss off the staff and is an easy way
to ensure that you never play there again. Just roll with the punches and make the most of every situation.
You are a touring musician... bad situations are around every corner.
 Chapter 09 | OUTSIDE THE BOX 103

Local Touring: Play within

18O MI Radius
frank mauceri
The one thing I always say to the bands is to tour. Of course, that’s after I tell them to leave music to the
professionals, maybe you should go to plumbing school or become an accountant. Those that will try should
learn this: make yourself relevant. Play a gig every weekend, either in your home town or within a 180 mile
drive. Why 180 miles? If you work a day job, you can get to an out of town venue on a Friday night by 8 PM,
in time for a 10 PM set. Be willing to sleep on someone’s floor (a couch if you’re one of the lucky few), or play
a basement party. Plenty of really great bands started that way. Here’s a trick: make friends with a drummer
in a band in the nearest college town and trade weekend basement gigs. Anyone these days can (and will)
make a record. It’s very easy to do. Touring is the trick. Music fans of all genres still seem to prefer the live
experience and buying records off of musicians they see live.

Outside the Venue

Tony Guidry
Imagine yourself as a young rapper who loves shoes — Jordans.

What's stopping you from filling a cooler or few thermos containers with hot chocolate, going to the stores
where people are lined up all night for J's, and giving them something warm to drink? Maybe charge their
phones for them. Let them use your wifi hot spot for 30 minutes.

I guarantee that a rapper who focuses on Jordan brand fans will see a 30-50% conversion rate by reaching out
to folk sitting in line for the newest J's. Give them a little warmth and a little music. Get their email address.
Get their social media handle. Tag them. Keep a list.
104 BAND:SMART

GEt Out of town!

It’s difficult for a band to stay in their local market for too long — after a while familiarity breeds
contempt — although that might be a bit harsh – you get what I mean. There is always something new,
cooler to see. The best way for a band to expand and grow in its home market is to leave for a little while.
It enables a ‘going away show,’ sending pics and video to fans from the road (“here I am with my head in
an alligator!” etc), and most importantly — a welcome home show. Even if it’s just for a week, this kind
of activity is important. You can start to tour just on weekends (the flower petal plan works well for this)
and gradually build up your skills before stringing a few weekends together.

WHEN YOU DECIDE TO GIG OUT OF TOWN

Do not go to any city unless you are sure of the outcome (thanks Sun Tzu). Get on the net. Get with
other bands. Don’t even think about making any money.

THE $50 YOU’RE NOT GOING TO GET DOESN’T MATTER RIGHT NOW
Rather, find other bands that will play for nothing and share equipment so the evening isn’t a total cluster.
Gigswap!

Your plan (please have one!) needs to layer the unique elements of your band’s strengths and weaknesses,
the location of your fans, the availability of good clubs, and other bands to play with the inner needs of
the band itself.

TOURING PATTERNS
We can all draw nice patterns on a map, but it gets shredded when you start to book events, a certain club
only has Thursday nights for your type of music so you have to double back. An important radio show
can only happen on a certain day. You just have to fit the tour to the opportunities at a certain level rather
than trying to fit the opportunities to your pre-conceived plan. Does this mean that you shouldn’t make
a plan? No, you need to be aware of all of these decisions.

You can tour:

• Regionally: usually involves a band staying close to their home base and slowly traveling further
away in concentric circles.
• Weekend-PLUS
• Petal Pattern
• Weekend Hit and Runs

A gig is worth five rehearsals. Play as many gigs as possible, because no

matter how well rehearsed you are, nothing comes close to the real thing.
– Jim Clark

Q: If you could tell a band one thing, what would it be?

A: Merch and tour.
– Luke Stokes
 Chapter 09 | OUTSIDE THE BOX 105

band battles
CHECKLIST FOR BANDS INVOLVED IN A BAND BATTLE
Don’t even ask how the slots were decided — they are usually random, or pulled from a hat. The
organizers either cared a lot and took care over it (and will be pissed at you for asking) or they
won't have taken any care, asked a 10 year old to put the list together and will be pissed that you
are asking — waiting for the next, sigh and ask for a ‘better slot’ creating a cascading cluster of
time moving.

BE NICE. Help to promote ALL of the bands on the event — don’t tell your fans the time you are
on and create an event somewhere else so that you can pretend that you are late for a previous
engagement, but really you are ruining the evening for everyone else.

DO NOT BAD MOUTH ANY OF THE EQUIPMENT. It might be the organizers, the roadies, the stage
managers the other bands, but it's not yours and you didn’t have to bring it and everyone else has
to use it.

DO NOT BAD MOUTH ANY OF THE OTHER BANDS. (even with your really really clever backhanded
compliments that seem funny BUT AREN'T) You never know if someone from that band is
standing close by to you — and you just lost their help when your guitar inexplicably snaps in two
right before your behind the head solo (it will) and you’ll look like a total jerk.

OFFER TO SHARE YOUR GEAR. It might seem like you are helping the other bands — but really, you
are helping yourself — because the audience won’t be in a good mood when the night goes two
hours long and EVERY SINGLE drummer has to tune their tom-toms. Drummers, don’t tune
your drums after the doors have opened. EVER.

UNDERSTAND THAT IT'S NOT A PRESENTATION OF THE VERY BEST SHOWCASE OF YOUR MUSIC.
It’s an elevator pitch on a skateboard blindfolded in a wind tunnel smelling of piss… You don’t
need your personal bass drum mic — the sound guy might not even remember to put it in the PA
or if he does he’ll forget to take the 200hz hi pass off of the channel (sound man joke!).

And you will upset the judges; if they are any good they will be looking at everything but what
you throw from the stage. Everyone can do that these days. It’s all of the offstage stuff that matters.

HELP OTHER BANDS. Even if they kick your butt, then isn’t it great to know a kick-butt band owes
you a favour?

THANK THE OTHER BANDS AND TELL PEOPLE TO STAY. Make sure that your fans stay to see other
bands. You might think it’s cool to leave early with your fans to demonstrate how many fans you
have, but you (you insecure prick) just eroded your community spirit and showed the judges that
you don’t care about the event or the community — massive FAIL. Plus, two bands from now,
you’ll see a much better bass player than the one you have, and you’ll need to replace yours because
he’s shagging your girlfriend while you were slagging the sound system (to the sound guy) in the
green room.
106 BAND:SMART

Judging
Say what you want about band battles (beat battles or any kind of battles), but they exist. The mechanics
make it easy for sponsors to award prizes as incentives to artists and to their audiences and they aren't
going away.

Expect to have a short set and be unfairly judged by jerks who don’t know the subtleties of your genre,
like me...

More and more of these types of battles are happening online, too.
 Chapter 09 | OUTSIDE THE BOX 107

Be professional and polite to everyone. The staff helping might be people who run sound at other clubs and could recommend you for gigs. The
load-in chick might actually be the club's booking agent. That other band might just need opening acts for big gigs. And the judges are bound
to be somebody who has some power and clout in the scene. Just because you don’t recognize someone does not mean they are not important.

Stay the whole time. Support the other acts. There is so much to learn in a situation like this if you pay attention. There are so many
good contacts you can make if you talk to the other bands. And believe me, the judges are watching. And the judges are not impressed
if you ask them if you can leave early because you have work in the morning… If nothing else, you can get a list of fill in musicians that
shine above their crappy bands for when you have to fire your guitarist for being too drunk.

Take your win or loss and any feedback with a grain of salt. Sometimes the judges use criteria that you don’t know about. Sometimes
the judges have information you do not about you or other bands that affects their decision. If the battle was to be an opening band,
the judges may have to evaluate whether your gear and band members will fit on the bus. Sometimes you just have an off night. If you
have shown up, networked, and been open to the experience, you will leave further ahead than when you walked in.
- Joanna Quargnali-Linsley

gig swap
You are invariably going to come up against silence — silence from promoters, radio, stores, labels,
journalists — everyone — there is a reason for it — everyone is busy, no one has the time. YOU have to
get to level 1, 2, and 3 on your own.

Stop thinking about most of the things that you might have been thinking were important and start
thinking about which basic human needs you can fulfill for a band traveling to your city: help with
promotions, your audience, accommodation, food… these are the things that will be interesting to the self
interested, the tired, the hungry the desperate for any audience greater than 2 oh my god — there’s a site!

WELCOME TO GIGSWAP
It would be interesting to look at a study of what it would cost to provide free accommodation to bands
for two years. In return for e-mail addresses, photographs and autographs in a guest book and some other
stuff, your networking would go through the roof and your spare bedrooms would become the repository
of so much knowledge (and probably some other nasty stuff, too) that you could write a book about it.
108 BAND:SMART

Does gigswapping always

work out?
greg whiteside
Gig-swapping is always a risk. Bands often embellish their worth and/or bail out on their side of the deal.
But it’s worth trying. If you win over any of their fans, they will talk about it and hopefully come out the
next time you’re there.
- Tims Myth

Always do a little bit of research on the other band. If this is a gigging band that has done its fair share of
shows then they should know the deal. It’s just a matter of “you scratch my back and I scratch yours.” If
a band comes from a long distance, you hook them up with a place to sleep, hot meals, and show them a
good time around your city. Make something special out of it. Just try to start good relationships with good
bands in areas far away that you plan on going to as soon as you’ve earned a name for yourselves at home.
One region at a time. When setting up a bill, find some bands you have networked with, three or four, go to
the venue you’re trying to play and present them with the bill; show the bills drawing power. (If you don’t
know any bands, it’s because your networking game is weak. Don’t bother setting up a bill until you got the
networking part of the game down). When you’re setting up a bill it’s always best to work out who’s paying
for what as far as the PA goes. If you’re playing at a place without a PA... (And never play at a place without
a PA unless you’re setting up a show at the teen community center or something like that.) If you’re playing
at a bar with no PA, it’s because they don’t do regular shows. No regular shows equals no walk in traffic there
to hear bands, and the bar regulars aren’t there to hear bands.
- March into Paris

Gig swapping is considered by many as a very important part of DIY booking and building a fan base. It’s about
networking with other bands. It’s important to find bands that you relate to, so the fans will relate as well. Be
creative with your website: the Everyday Heroes have a gig swapping form bands can fill out. Cool idea.
- GigDoggy

Preview the band and get a sense of their direction/attitude online. But there’s no substitute for seeing the
band play live.
- SleepSix

We chose bands by going to their shows and seeing them live before we invite them to play with us.
- Throw The Fight
 Chapter 09 | OUTSIDE THE BOX 109

buy ons / pay to play

This practice — once frowned upon and quite unusual is now common practice across the country. The
fact is that there are so many artists willing to do ANYTHING to get a gig (whether or not it is going to
do anything for their careers) that clubs have responded and, like anyone in a free market, they are selling
stuff to the people who want it — opportunities to bands — whether they are real or not. Be careful —
it’s a chance to be in a big empty room, cold and trembling because they haven’t turned the heat on yet.

EVERY OPPORTUNITY SHOULD BE LOOKED UPON AS AN OPPORTUNITY TO FAIL AND

FAIL HARD UNLESS YOU DO SOMETHING PRO-ACTIVE TO MAKE SURE YOU DON’T.
Designed by promoters to make sure that they can turn a profit and stay in business, even if all of the crappy
bands don’t have much of an audience, pay to play creates a very sad by-product: audiences show their support for
band #4 by arriving just in time to see band #4 but by also leaving just before the start of band #5. I understand
this — it makes sense BUT it robs these bands of the ability to play to each other’s audience, it robs the audience
of being exposed to other bands that might surprise them (yeah I know not always in a good way), but it also robs
the band members themselves of playing in front of their peers — that’s a pretty good adrenalin shot wasted...
The solution to all of this is pretty easy. Bands can tell their audiences to stick around. Bands can stick around too
instead of splitting early and loading out during the next band’s set. That’s RUDE, dude!

If you “buy on” to a larger tour then protect yourself with a couple things:

Memorialize what the manager, band or agent are telling you. They might say that they expect to play to
500 people a night… Well, write that down and, while they are confident that this will be the case, protect
yourself with a formula and schedule of payments… 50% up front. 25% 1/2 way though and 25% at the end.
Tie the last payment to something like, "You anticipate performing to 500 paying customers for 30 shows =
15,000 people… If the total attendance is less than 10,000 then the last payment is forfeit…" or something.

QUANTIFY!
• 500 people x 30 shows = 15,000 people. If the total number of people is less than 10,000, then you
can pro-rate the fee.
• If you paid 10k for the opportunity to play to 15000 people, then that’s 66 cents per person. You can
use that information if/when things go bad.
• If the total attendance is only 8000 people, then you could argue that you should only pay 8000 x
66¢ = $5,333.
• Of course, you can only have this discussion and do something about it if you have held some of the
fee back. You can avoid paying the last of a series of agreed payments; you should never expect to get
a refund of monies already paid.
• Invest in yourself if you find the right tour to buy on to (it doesn't have to be a tour — it could just
be one or two dates on a tour). You'll also need to invest in material to give away: shirts, cds, songs,
etc and have enough people on hand to take names...
110 BAND:SMART
 How to make
your show
an event
Photo: Marija Hajster

Always choose the smaller venue. The worst thing that can happen is that the show sells out! Put a sign up, leave a crowd
on the street prompting cries of, “who’s playing there tonight?” Create the opportunity to place a great big SOLD OUT
splash on your web page. No one (except us) will ever call to ask the capacity of the venue. Two hundred people in a room
that holds 750 is a funeral. Put those same people in a 150 capacity bar and it’s a riot!

Every show you do affects the next one — good or bad. You are like a coyote on a frozen lake — you don’t move across
the lake by bouncing up and down to test the ice: you slowly, gingerly edge your way cautiously forward — testing the
firmness of the ice before transferring your weight onto the unknown patch of ice...
OR, put in another, less Man vs. Wild kind of way… you don’t buy a big bag of ice
before testing out a couple of little rocks do ya? Ok, got ya. When you create an event that’s
notable and cool, people talk.
When you don’t, they walk!

111
112 BAND:SMART

START SIMPLE:

VIDAL S • Use a landmark event in your band’s history. Album

RINSE RASSOON IT! release party? Make more of them. Release more songs

RINSE R EPEAT! — not one album every 18 months — an ep every 4

EPEAT! months, a vinyl single every month, a song a week. DO
SOMETHING DIFFERENT! (See The Difference for
the full explanation of all of the benefits of this.)

USE OTHER EVENTS, TOO:

• Your last show before SXSW, the first show after
returning from Germany. You don't have to go to
Germany to have a last show before going to Germany
gig! Or returning home... pretend. That’s not really a lie
— it’s show business!
• Your keyboard player’s last show. (YAY!)
• The lead singer’s birthday (come watch him mess up,
miss all the high notes, split his pants and try to steal the
keyboard player’s girlfriend).
• Benefit show – to get the keyboard player out of jail and
the singer out of the hospital.

ADD A CAUSE

• Do I want to see your band? NO. Do I want to help starving children around the planet? YES.
You increase the chances of a better outcome for all concerned. This also gives you a reason to
send out a legitimate update to everyone after the event. “Congratulations to all of us! We just sent
$500 to PETA2.” …

ADD A COMPETITIVE ELEMENT:

• Battle / Band, Best / Beat
• Most tickets sold (for the cause)
• If you have a competitive element, you can add... PRIZES. You can recruit sponsors more easily
— they don’t have to donate $$$. They can give a free haircut, or a free guitar, or a photo shoot,
or a session, or some shirts. That costs them less and publicizes their business and the event, too.
• A judge panel can also add to the "poster power" of the event.
• More about this later!

APPLY THE “GET IN FREE IF” MODEL:

• Get in free with four cans for the food bank.
• Get in free if you wear purple (Prince tie-in)
• Get in free if you bring an instrument for the local school.
• Get in free if you are a complete idiot

Don't worry too much about being a huge success

— concentrate on avoiding miserable failure.
 Chapter 10 | HOW TO MAKE YOUR SHOW AN EVENT 113

ASSIGN A THEME TO THE WHOLE NIGHT…& CROSS-POLLINATE:

• The Chicago White Sox biggest event is ELVIS night! Lots of baseball organizations think outside
the box. The Cubs do a Star Wars night! Be as ridiculously outside of the box as them! Except, don’t
have “baseball night”, the last thing most clubs need is a bunch of lunatics with baseball bats.

SAME TIME EACH MONTH

• Allow your event to grow by hitting the same time each month with many like minded bands,
artists, bakers, whatever! Use alliteration as a memory prompt — first Friday, $2 Tuesdays, third
Thursday, whatever Wednesday, Tequila Tuesday… I see art galleries do this very successfully.

HIJACK AN EVENT (PIGGYBACK)

• Find a huge successful show that you have NOTHING to do with — and host the afterparty!
AC/DC after show event. Make sure you flyer all over the car park and send people into the crowd
to direct people to your event. People are sheep.

USE THE CALENDAR!

• Pick a Month. January gives us: National Blood Donor Month, National
Braille Literacy Month (there’s a t-shirt), National Soup Month
• Add a Birthday. A birthday is a great theme to hang a hat on and widen
your audience. Johnny Cash’s birthday provides an opportunity for you (and
your fans) to step outside of your normal set list. (phew!)
• Combine Two Birthdays. Jan 8th and 9th are Elvis’s and Richard Nixon’s
birthdays respectively. You could have a pill-popping, presidential, secretly
recorded show, lose 17 minutes of it — then triumphantly announce that
you’ve found it after a few weeks — send out another email!
Combine all of these ideas and any more you can think of, then
mix well.
Nothing is too dumb to succeed if approached in the right way (see
Prince tie in). All things being equal, if the choice is
between booking a raging narcissist or
LESS FUN BUT STILL IMPORTANT: someone with the reputation of being
easy to work with, it’s an easy call
• DON’T play your local market too often. Don’t ask your friends if you which one to give the gig to.
are playing too often, it’s their JOB to support you! They will lie! So, how
- Charlie Hunter
often is too often? It depends… If I made it a rule that you should have a
great new t-shirt or something for every local show, then that would be
about right. But there would be some bands who are just crazy amped-
up who like screenprinting that would do a show each week with a new shirt and then stitch them
all together at the end of the concert “series” to make a patchwork quilt of grooviness.

BUT, even though they are overplaying their market, if they have a new t-shirt at every show, then
there will be all kinds of crazy “collect-the-set” people who will start going to all of the shows –
NOT TO SEE THE BAND – just to “collect the set.” This strategy also works for the lazy band.
If they can’t get it together to create a new shirt design more than once every 12 weeks, then great.
Now it’s a real event.
114 BAND:SMART

• Stay 2 pay periods away from any large event you aren’t piggybacking. It’s that large national
event’s job to drain all of the money out of an area before moving on to the next one; give people
a chance to recharge their financial batteries.

• Getting more money for your shows: You need to PUSH in another direction. It’s not
unprofessional or ungrateful to ask for more money — there just doesn’t seem to be much point. IF
you TRIUMPH, and double your $$$, between the four members of your band, you each put an
extra $5 in your pocket — or looked at another way, you almost paid for the gas and the first round of
drinks! Is it really worth raising the subject? I’d suggest just keeping your heads down and not causing
any problems… You need to PUSH in another direction. How about asking if the venue would agree
to some kind of drink special for an hour if you (and the other three bands) agree to waive any fee?
You might be surprised at the reaction from the venue, then you will be able to hype the event with
something that people are interested in — cheap booze! This will be a nice reward for anyone of your
friends that has already seen you seven times and a great incentive for anyone that hasn’t.

MILES AND MONTHS / BEFORE AND AFTER

• Make sure bands you have booked don’t have competing events (they will!).

• Incentivise early ticket buying - Once someone has a ticket then each person becomes a word of
mouth poster for the show and a blocker of other events.

Your Fan’s Friend: Want to come bowling next week?

Your Fan: No, I can't. I have tickets to go see _______"
Your Fan’s Friend: Oh, screw bowling! I'll come, too!

• You can also do this by creating a VIP package – “Buy a pair of tickets NOW and you’ll get the
new shirt and EP FREE!” You will also gain the benefit of knowing there will be people at the
show. OR you will be able to proactively deal with a show that looks like it will tank two weeks
out. IF you wait until the day of the show to hope that people show up, all you can do is crap your
pants and panic.

• Price break / package / eBay

• Use the guest list as a seed-sowing device – But early! when it means something. Give the people
you have invited a +1; That way, they have to tell all of their friends so their friends can compete
for the slot and that is why they'll blast it up on social media... "I have an extra ticket! Who wants
to go with me?"

• Use flyers – Not in the hopes that anyone is going to read them but as a reason to walk around
and meet people, make eye contact, talk! Place them directly into someone’s hand. The flyer is the
reason you aren't crazy.

• In-store or afternoon acoustic show. Not to gain 50 more people at your show, but to have the
venue/business blast to their social media including info on your main evening event.

The guestlist is for friends, family & people you might

want to woo. Everyone else can pay. They have day jobs.
– Thor Harris
 Chapter 10 | HOW TO MAKE YOUR SHOW AN EVENT 115

ADD OFF STAGE ELEMENTS

• Booths from vendors – Maybe some of the businesses you reached out to promote, too.

• Limited edition posters – By three different artists = word of mouth to the artists' data bases plus
items to put in your archieve for future competitions, kickstarter levels, etc.

• Art in foyer – Launch, preview & code for wine! Once you introduce art into the equation,
everything becomes groovier.

• Merchandisers in lounge – Book signing

y
• More reasons! How man
THE AFTERPARTY of your
s
• Should be in a different location = word of mouth with a different data base than the one at the
friend
y
club or yours. have an
OTHER CONSIDERATIONS THAT WILL MAKE OR BREAK YOUR SHOW: money?
• Ticket price - Play for free!

Think about how much you would pay to see you? And, how many of your friends have any
money? Exactly! It makes your show immediately more attractive than many of the others that
week. People will have more money for beer and merchandise. You’re not giving anything away
really. If you are good, you’re just pulling in more people to be randomly EXPOSED TO YOUR
amazing ARTISTRY and become fans FOR LIFE.

Think of yourself as a drug dealer. The first few hits free and as long as you have a good stuff the people
will come. Just remember not to sprinkle too much baby laxative on your product!

• Promote in places where people don’t usually promote.

Be smart — I don’t mean the paint factory (although Clothing Store 1 Hair 1
that's not a terrible idea). I mean tattoo parlours, clothing
stores, skate shops, hair salons, piercing salons, bakeries, Tattoo / Piercing
restaurants, coffee shops, anywhere and everywhere except Skate
the venue — that's easy and you should be all over that.

By doing this, your packages, energy, emails, posters will

go further, have more impact and be a great introduction
between you and these indie business owners that might The Big Clothing Store 2
form alliances with you moving forward. Show
• Secondary markets: I cover this extensively in
Tour:Smart — but, basically, before you OVERsaturate Hair 2
the local market — spend some time travelling in a 15-
20 mile radius to some centers of activity in other areas.

• Security – Are security polite or overly enthusiastic and Record Store?

Snow Board
looking for trouble? Is the club a kind of mini Ferguson?
116 BAND:SMART

• Bathrooms – Depending on your audience this might be very important or not at all.
Or do a show online
• Parking – Is there any? Or, is it crazy expensive?
with StageIt, StreetJelly,
Ustream, or others… • Drink prices & choice – It doesn't matter if you play for a low ticket price or FREE if your fans
but I'd really suggest the are being gouged at the bar. A good selection of drinks is also a good gage of the attention the
face-to-face approach. venue is paying to community of the overall experience.
You can use one of the
online services as a • Neighbourhood – Is the venue located in a neighbourhood notorious for people getting their
way to stay in touch or windows smashed? (you should provide security on the car park and advertise the fact!) Was
kick start an upcoming someone murdered on the doorsetep of the club last week (one of my dj gigs)
tour or release. • Myth – Is the club one of mythological status - CBGB's would fall into this category if it still
existed, The Apollo, just something to think about - a strong myth component would over-ride
stinky horrible bathrooms (CBGB's)... well, almost.

USE THE FIVE POINTED STAR INWARD-FACING CRUSH TECHNIQUE! I understand that you want and need to perform
more than once every 9 to 12 weeks — so start to travel in a 50 or so mile radius. Places where you think people will
travel to another event. It might be more than 50, or less. Find out of the way places to build your audience instead
of playing the same club over and over and over to fewer and fewer punters. Use the five pointed star inward facing
crush technique!
 Chapter 10 | HOW TO MAKE YOUR SHOW AN EVENT 117

Tickets
Both Eventbrite and Brown Paper Tickets are platforms you can use to effectively manage your ticketing
needs. Both have the facility to enable ticketing and payment before the show, reminders right before the
show, and contact management after show. I believe they both have export directly to Salesforce, which if
you are on tour, can massively change the outcome of a tour and fuel momentum. Imagine the band that
tours, then at the end of the tour (after a few days) someone gets the short straw and has to enter all of the
attendee names into the database. With an 80% success rate, some user error on the front end, drunken
scribblings, and [email protected] in there, that’s horrifying loss of the gold dust of fans!

With either of these programs, you can very quickly add all of the new addresses (with their permission, of
course, which you will ask for upon buying a ticket!), you can easily send a newsletter to the 100 sign- ups
from each of your first two shows with some pics, tracks, and news about the five separate flat tires you’ve
had since Tuksa. Imagine the fuel that this adds to the fire when those 100 new fans are paid attention to
and also they are enabled to send links for the rest of your tour along with maybe a pic of themselves at the
show to their friends in one or two of the cities you have yet to visit. BOOM. Yes, you’re welcome.

If you need a person to help you navigate all of this stuff, BPT are awesome with a person on the other
end of the phone 24/7 in what is always a stressful time for any artist/promoter. Eventbrite, not so much.
The decision is yours, but whatever, choose one!

BPT will also print real paper tickets and deliver them to you for that extra special show where the tickets
could become collectibles. They are a “not-just-for-profit” company that is always trying to help artists…
just sayin.

10 Tips to Get Real Fans

(not just friends) to Shows
Madalyn Sklar
I get asked this question all the time. The answer is simply get out and hustle. Just
because you’re playing a show, it doesn’t mean the venue will pack itself. There are
many things you can do both online and offline to attract fans.

1 UPDATE YOUR WEBSITE CALENDAR. There is nothing worse than a bunch of

outdated gigs listed on your site. It’s a turn off and will give the impression that
you are not out playing shows. As soon as you book a show, go update your website.

2 SHOOT AN EMAIL BLAST TO YOUR MAILING LIST. You have a mailing list, right?
Use it! This is your most valuable tool in your arsenal, yet I find so many bands
118 BAND:SMART

are under-utilizing it. You can easily manage your list and send out messages through ReverbNation or
FanBridge. Be sure to collect email addresses at your shows, your website and through social media.

3 SET UP A FACEBOOK EVENT. Invite your local fans and friends.

DON’T WASTE YOUR TIME INVITING PEOPLE FROM ALL OVER THE WORLD.
THEY AREN’T COMING!
Make a friends list: Log into Facebook >> on the Left Sidebar scroll down to Friends >> Place your mouse
over Friends and click More >> Create a List. Go through your friends and add the local peeps to a list and
call it Local Fans. Every time you make a new friend/fan in your local area, add them to this list and watch it
grow! You’ll set this up once, add people to it as you become friends, then every time you create a FB Event
you’ll invite people from this list.

4 TWEET YOUR SHOW INFORMATION. Be sure to post a link for more details. Put in "Please RT!" at the
beginning or end of the tweet. This will encourage people to share it.

5 USE REVERBNATION. They offer great tools such as the popular Facebook Band Profile application,
FanReach to manage your mailing list, Event Calendar to manage your shows and so many other
valuable tools. And I love how it all ties into your Facebook.

6 GET OUT TO THE VENUE 10-14 DAYS AHEAD OF TIME AND POSTER IT UP. Talk to the door person, the
bartenders, sound guy. Get to know the people who work there. Buy them a drink, hang out, give them
a CD. Be likeable and they’ll tell everyone about you and your cool band.

7 MAKE YOUR SHOWS MEMORABLE. The best way to get people to your show is give them a great show.
Get people talking about you. Word of mouth is very powerful.

8 BE REALISTIC. Don’t place high expectations that you’ll get instant results. It can take time. But be
consistent with it.

9 MAKE IT A HABIT AFTER YOUR SHOW TO TALK TO YOUR FANS. Walk around with your mailing list in
one hand and your CDs in the other. Talk to people and encourage them to join your list and buy a CD.
You’ll be surprised at the results if you just ask.

10 GET INVITED BACK TO THE VENUE. Do this by thanking the venue and its staff on stage throughout
the set. Thank them after your show. Send a Thank You card within a week of your show. That will
get you noticed. It makes you memorable. You’ll stand out from most of the bands because it’s rarely done.

I hope you found these tips helpful. Getting more than just your friends out to a show takes some time, work,
dedication and consistency.
 Chapter 10 | HOW TO MAKE YOUR SHOW AN EVENT 119

Genius Promotions
Pegasus Unicorn: Although they don’t get the prize for best band name, they do get the prize for terrific
idea to spice up an album release party. Take a gumball machine and wrap one gumball in gold foil. The
person who gets this has a song written about them on the next album! The genius is in the name — not
“the Gumball Song-About-You Contest!” but “ the Instant Immortality Sweepstakes!” I love this!

Instant Immortality Sweepstakes

Asleep (band member Nicholas Kloss relays the story): Tired of flyering (and flyering and getting
nowhere, really), the band created Punchy, the 15’ high robot, complete with PA, voice altering effect,
smoke and flailing arms. Punchy attracts more attention than the band and has actually made them jealous!

Eric Idle of Monty Python solved two problems with one great idea. He wanted a choir of lumberjacks
for the “Lumberjack Song,” but it’s expensive to travel with a bunch of extra people. He listed the
opportunity on eBay so anyone to be in the choir. This was low risk — even if two of the eight were crap,
it doesn’t matter. They will be drowned out by the good ones. With a few velcroed lumberjack shirts, the
theatre of the piece works really well. Plus, it’s great word of mouth!

You: Oh my god! I'm going to be in the lumberjack choir.

Your Friend: What?
You: I'm going to be in the "I'm a lumberjack choir" for
Eric Idles show.
Your Friend: Where?
You: At the blah blah theatre.
Your Friend: When?

***Insert date and money here!***

Remember my fake tour of Germany from Tour:Smart? Well, Justin Pearson was way ahead of me with his fake correctional facility tour:

“It was tacky and ridiculous, a weird mix of all the stupid stuff we couldn’t get away with in our other bands. For our first EP,
we put out a live recording supposedly performed in a correctional facility. It was not believable at all, but we still managed
to fool people here and there. The recording even ended with a staged riot.

Because of everyone involved there was a lot of hype around the band. We even promoted a tour of correctional facilities
complete with t-shirts listing tour dates. However, we never left on that tour, since there was no way that we could actually
play those places and there was no way that people on the outside could attend. But some people actually went to some of
these correctional facilities to try to catch us live.”
- Justin Pearson
120 BAND:SMART

"will play for gas money"

steve harm
A virtually unknown band from Milwaukee sent a message asking to get on two shows
with national headliners. They were “...willing to play for just gas money...”.

I don’t have time for this, but because no one on that end is thinking this through, I
will do it for you.

• MILWAUKEE TO LA CROSSE 210.6 MILES. 421.2 MILES ROUND TRIP.

• MILEAGE TYPICAL VAN/TRAILER COMBO: 10 MPG
• 421.2 / 10MPG = 42.12 GALLONS
• 42.12 GALLONS X $3.90/GALLON = 164.27

“...WILLING TO PLAY JUST FOR GAS MONEY...”

JUST $164.27? For an opener? What a bargain for a band that will draw zero people.

Is anyone in the band going to school for business or accounting?

It's tough love, people. And I’m always the a-hole for telling it like it is.

E CALL
PREPARE FOR TH
ose
ro mo ter s an d Ve nu es ” chapter in Tour:Smart. Th
Read the “P er that what
ar e tel lin g yo u wh at they want! Always rememb te
gu ys
g for is a fav or. Kn ow yo ur information—concentra
you’re askin e like DJ’s—
the ha rd fac ts— no t the opinions. Opinions ar
on
everybody is one.
 Chapter 10 | HOW TO MAKE YOUR SHOW AN EVENT 121

LOAD-IN TIME
CORRECT UNDERSTANDING: If a band has a load-in time of say 6:30 from that time they may attempt to enter the
premises and inquire about loading in of their gear.

INCORRECT UNDERSTANDING: If a band has a load-in time of say 6:30 they arrive at 1:45 in the afternoon and knock
incessantly on the back door. Usually they knock while the owner is in the basement knee-deep in standing crap working
with a plumber to fix a leaking drain pipe. After trudging all the way upstairs to find five snot-nosed kids asking if they
can load-in now (and hang out all day!). They are politely told to come back at 6:30.

PROMOTER
CORRECT UNDERSTANDING: This is a person who actively works to promote a show. They promote by distributing flyers,
plugging the show wherever they can and try to get as many people as possible to come to the show. If they have an
out-of-town band booked on the show they take financial responsibility to ensure they get paid and are taken care of in
whatever way they need. They also take charge in organizing the show and making sure all the bands know when they
are scheduled to play and how the money works for getting paid.

A “FOLLOWING”
CORRECT UNDERSTANDING: A “following” is a collection of fans that attend the performances of a particular band. This
is what bands try to develop to get ahead in the business and grow over time and is a measure of their general popularity.
The larger a band’s following generally means they will be booked more often and on better nights at the Creepy Crawl.

– Creepy Crawl

Be honest. If you blag it and con a venue into giving you a Thursday night slot because you are HUUUUUUUUGE —
then that’s terrific, until you are standing on stage in an empty club. It is the phallic equivalent of a jump into a freezing
cold pool. Congratulations, at last, your career is now the size of your shrunken penis — but hey, look at my nipples!
– Martin Atkins

Musicians are also in the business of providing experiences: cathartic, pleasurable, intense, escapist, political, any type
or combination. Think: what is the experience that your listeners carry away with them? Is it about them, or you? Is it
simply too loud? What about you will lead them to return and bring others, given all that they could do with their time?
– Mark Rubel

If you can't find a designer to create a poster for you, or one flakes on you, no problem! Go to flyerlizard.com! You can
easily share your flyers with unique flyer pages. With direct access to share on Facebook, Twitter and Pinterest, and easy
to print PDF downloads of your event flyer, you will have no trouble making your flyer accessible to everyone. And you
can embed songs on them with SoundCloud!
122 BAND:SMART

Pimpin’ for tips can be a piece of cake!

Nancy Apple
It didn’t come easy to me at first, but once I realized that part of my job
includes begging (for gigs, better gigs, gigs that pay, free or discounted gear),
I started working that tip bucket like a polyester suit wearing preacher passin’
the plate - but in my case the plate has cake on it. Amen. Yum.

I discovered (the hard way) that if I put out a tip bucket but don’t work it, my
gas tank stays on empty. Now I put out that same tip bucket and ask people
to write their name on paper money, fold that up and put it in the tip bucket,
which makes them eligible for a fabulous door prize!

Being someone who collects nearly everything, it was easy to look through
my yard sale pile for cool giveaways: Old tour shirts, CDs, shot glasses, Pez,
lunch boxes, Elvis stuff, old 8 tracks, and VHS tapes. The fans actually get a
kick out of whatever I give away, even when I say it’s from the yard sale pile.
It’s even gotten to the point that if they have something cool in their own
junk pile at home, they often give it to me for a door prize!

But even this can seem old hat after a while.

YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO BE MORE CREATIVE THAN YOU WERE THE LAST GIG.
So I finally had no choice but to bring out the big guns: Chocolate cake.

I got in the habit of baking cakes for special fans on or near their birthdays a few years ago. The most popular
is chocolate with cream cheese frosting. So one morning while looking around the house for door prize crap,
errrr stuff, I decided that all I really had left was junky junk. Cool junk gets tips, junky junk not so much. So
I made three little cakes, each one enough to satisfy two hogs or four regular people. I could not believe it
that night at our gig! People who normally tipped a couple bucks where tossing in all the ones they had in
their pockets. Let’s just say we did good.

So then last month, in an effort to up the ante, the grand door prize was dinner and a movie at my house
(I cook the burgers and fries, they bring the Redbox), which got an even better turnout in tips! To even top
that, the fabulous door prize this month was a custom made cake that will serve a dozen of their friends in
whatever flavor they want (even though I know it will be chocolate, LOL), which I will bring to them special
delivery at my NEXT show. This not only makes some lucky fan happy, but ensures they come back with a
table full of friends to share their bounty!

See where I’m going with this? It’s not rocket science, getting great tips is as easy as pie — or cake, or burgers...
 Chapter 10 | HOW TO MAKE YOUR SHOW AN EVENT 123

Happy Birthday DJango

Christo Ruppenthal
Jazz guitarist Django Reinhardt’s impact on guitar playing cannot be
overstated. He was truly a revolutionary!   He led a band featuring the guitar
when it was mostly considered a rhythm instrument.  Django was one of the
first successful lead playing guitarists during an era that was dominated by
horns and which predated the electric guitar (although later in his career he
played them).

A whole genre of his musical followers named “Gypsy Jazz” has sprung up. 
My band Caravan Gypsy Swing Ensemble is a strong part of this scene.  We
are based in Madison, WI but have played throughout the Midwest.   We
build our sound around bringing a fresh take on Django’s music.  January
23rd 2010 marked Django’s 100th birthday.  I wanted to figure out a way to
make this a special day for the band.  What better way to do that than to plan
a birthday party for Django, and while we are at it release a new CD!

Back in September of 2009, we were coming off a summer full of great gigs, concert, and festival appearances
throughout the Midwest.  We felt like we were really on top of our game.  We actually had plans to hit
the studio in October to record a new CD when inspiration struck.  Caravan GSE has always been a “live
band” and the idea to bring the studio into the nightclub to capture our live performance came to light. 
We invited our fans and the public to join us at The Brink Lounge in Madison, WI on a Thursday night in
late September for a live recording session with Audio For The Arts.  Although we did go into the studio
in October as planned, that September live recording became our “An Evening at the Brink Lounge” CD.  
Now that we had our new CD and an idea for our event we needed to get everything in order.  The benefit
of this type of event is that we really had a story to tell.  And people paid attention!

By sending out professional press release invitations to our “birthday party” we got the papers to pay attention
and got critics’ choice for the release gig in all the local papers. Our email blast and social media posts played
up the cake for Django and emphasized the party invitation vibe.

We added to the blitz by doing a couple live radio spots during the week leading up to the event and of
course playing Happy Birthday to Django on the air.  We also made sure to get ALL the appropriate DJs in
town advanced CD copies so they could promote our “birthday party”.  Many of them not only played our
music but also attended the show.  One of them, our friend John Kraniak (it was actually his birthday too)
of Madison, WI’s WORT FM 89.9, actually emceed the event and can be heard on the CD announcing the
band.

At the gig we performed all the new tunes from our new CD and filled out the night with many Django
covers to a room PACKED with our friends and fans.  Our birthday cake was a huge hit and is something
that still comes up when talking with fans.  We eventually had to post the recipe to the “Fans Section” of our
124 BAND:SMART

website.  We sold twice as many CDs that night as we ever had at another gig up to that point and made
much more on merch than at the door!  We actually managed to sell more of a previously released CD that
night than we do on average.

This whole scenario demonstrates the value of inbound marketing as opposed to outbound. We were
releasing a CD but made the message be “lets all get together and celebrate Django Reinhardt’s 100th
birthday” rather than “we are putting out a CD and you should come and buy one…”.  It also goes to show
how much traction you can have by presenting a themed night. And the best part about this is that we have
made it an annual event to celebrate Django’s birthday year after year.  In 2012 we even released a new
concert DVD using the same model.
 Chapter 10 | HOW TO MAKE YOUR SHOW AN EVENT 125

punchy the robot

Nicholas Kloss
Following SXSW, we prepared for an annual local music festival that draws approximately
2,000 music fans eager to drink and punch. It’s the main event each summer in downtown
Youngstown. To spice up a festival we felt had become predictable, the idea for a drinking
and punching robot was born.

The response was immediate at the festival. People were amazed and amused. It was a
crowd of drunk robots in awe of another drunk robot. Total idol worship.

We stole the local media, too. We managed to gather easy press. Not to mention, there are
countless girls that took pictures with it and posted them on the internet.

We have since used Punchy to promote by taking him to a college campus the week before
a show. We set him up outside the venue across the street from the campus, mid-day during
classes and used the P.A. inside the robot to play our music. You can’t escape a giant robot
blasting noisey rock and handing you a flyer. It does draw a crowd. The campus police
weren’t too happy about traffic backing up and the noise but that made it even better.

Punchy works for us as a promotional tool as well as stage prop. Our guitarists 3-year-old
nephew thinks it’s real. To us that means it’s fulfilling it’s duty considering many of the
people you’re trying to attract have the attention span and intelligence of a 3-year-old.
Whatever draws people in and exposes them to your product, ultimately leaving them
with a memory of your band is key.

YOU HAVE TO STUN PEOPLE AND LEAVE YOUR

BANDS IMPRINT ON THEIR BRAIN.

WOMEN LO
VE PUNCHY
!

I read about Joe Pug in a blog on Chicagoist (that gave a nice review of his album). Joe included his
personal email address in the article and invited anyone who wanted a copy of his album to email him. The
catch — you had to ask for at least two and promise to send one to a friend. Genius! A friend just sent one
copy of Joe’s album to someone who works in publishing in LA and another all the way to France.
126 BAND:SMART

15 reasons your show will succeed

1 You have booked four great artists, none of who have
performed in the area recently. 12 Two of the artists have awesome street teams.

2 It is on a good night of the week. This doesn't always

have to be a Thursday/Friday/Saturday — sometimes
13 Signed limited edition posters have been made by
two local artists. They are also selling the posters
to benefit the causes!
a Tuesday is cool.

3 The venue is the right size (or too small). 14 There will be a VIP preview of the poster artwork
(along with other artists that didn’t make the cut)
– before doors open in the foyer of the club.

4 Plentiful, reasonably priced secure parking close by.

No one needs a smashed window or a ticket.
15 A local art gallery is promoting the VIP preview
event.

5 The club has a great selection of reasonably priced

drinks.
16 A local skateboard shop has donated some
equipment to auction for the causes and has
provided blank boards for the artists to decorate & auction.
Auction includes tickets to the show (and mentions of it
everywhere too!).

6 There are special guest musicians sitting in with one

of the bands. More of a draw without increasing the
running time of the show (Poster power!). 17 A local bakery that works with the homeless has
donated baked goods for the VIP reception (and
is publicizing the event).

7 The venue has a terrific sound system so the show will

sound awesome!
18 Band #4 is trying really hard. They designed and
printed a special shirt for the event and it's being
sold at the bakery and the art gallery.

8 The security at the venue isn’t overly enthusiastic (or

threateningly violent).
19 20 V I P passes have been sent out to tastemakers in
the area 6 weeks in advance of the show. Secure in
the knowledge that they have their pass in their hands (plus

9 The event is a benefit. I don’t care about your band,

but I do care about animals, children, the homeless,
the planet, etc.
an extra for a friend) and knowing that it is now impossible
to have some last minute embarrassing guest list denial, they
start to talk about the event to their friends.

10 The event is being recorded. I want to support my

friends’ band plus I like the idea of hearing my
own voice screaming FREEBIRD or something else really
20 Local bloggers, radio and news teams are getting
behind the event. They’re tired of hearing nothing
but blaming from all of the other local bands. Plus, they like
smart before the encore. baked goods and VIP passes and the guy from the radio
station has a partial ownership of the skateboard shop.
11 All of the bands I have carefully chosen for the
event have terrific social media chops (I checked!).
21 All of the bands are performing at least one song by
John Lennon. It is the anniversary of his tragic death.
 Chapter 10 | HOW TO MAKE YOUR SHOW AN EVENT 127

22 The singer from band #2 will be busking on the

street for the two weekends before the show in two
secondary markets 15 miles away from the downtown area.
27 Larger artist's publicist pulls out all of the stops,
partly to help the cause and the event, but mainly
to show the other 4 artists what a great job she can do.

23 You deliberately chose another artist that is from a

larger city 35 miles away. They are certain to bring
a ton of their fans to make a good impression on the local
28 A liquor company rep stops by to offer help with
the next one.

promoters and they want to sound good on the live recording.

29 Three other bands are showing up with some of
their friends. Even though they didn’t make the

24 The ticket price is correct for the venue, the day

of the week, the local economy, the unemployment
rate, your demographic, and where you are in your progress to
cut to perform at this show, you have been to three of each
of their shows in the last 8 months and if you support the
scene, it will support you! Plus, they want to make sure you
greatness (not very far along really). see them so they are in the running for the next one.

25 Singer from band #1 is dj-ing an after-party at

a local late night hang out. They have done an
extensive e-mail campaign to their huge (and different)
30 Neither you nor anyone in your band is a total jerk.

mailing list.
31 The venue doesn’t smell too badly of piss.

26 A larger artist starts to feel the momentum and

offers to feature with one of the bands already
performing. You are able to do this because you spent time
working out all of the production logistics that a 4-band 32 You didn’t hope that the “promoter” or anyone
else would do any of this.
production can create. Everyone is sharing equipment.
128 BAND:SMART
Chapter 10 | HOW TO MAKE YOUR SHOW AN EVENT 129
130 BAND:SMART
Chapter 10 | HOW TO MAKE YOUR SHOW AN EVENT 131
132 BAND:SMART
 The Show

how to get better

Other fields, it seems, are so far, so very very far ahead of the music business — or at least the homestyle, cottage industry
version of it. Take sports for instance. They routinely use video and still images to analyze performances. (Sprinters, keep
your elbows in! Watch those hurdles! When you enter the first somersault, tuck you knees in!)

USE THE TOOLS THAT OTHER PEOPLE USE. Practice at home with a click
When you windmill that arm, think twice about the lucky charm bracelet and the (metronome) and you won’t rush
perm. I know that the audience will never forget it, but reattaching a piece of scalp during the live set. Your drummer
with hair (hopefully) isn’t fun or anything you want to be lining up for. will play better.
– Lee Popa
133
134 BAND:SMART

It might be the frequency of a specific combination of moves. Great at first, excellent when repeated
just in case someone missed it — but every song? Look for the things that work with your face, the
Do more of what works sneer, the smile. Did you realize that the super difficult drop move (eat your heart out Bruce Lee)
and less of what doesn't. actually showed more crack than a plumbers convention on the pavement in Compton? It might
not be the moves; it might be the clothes. The way they bunch, snag or squeeze. Watch videos of
your performance and do more of what works and less of what doesn’t.

getting a better live sound

Here’s a brilliant idea — get a map!

But we have GPS? Still get a map for when the GPS goes out… you know when right? When you are
late for the most important show of your career (of course) just get there on time and, as Lee Popa says,

EARLY IS ON TIME. ON TIME IS LATE.

Get to the venue on time and you will be able to get a decent sound check and implement some of this
great advice.

Too difficult? Then, don’t be a jerk to the soundman… also works pretty well.

OR

Don’t complain about the quality of the sound system or the soundman OVER THE PA?

Are you kidding me?

Anyway, here’s some tips for you to print out, write some important phone numbers on, crumple into a
ball then leave at a coffee shop:

when the
The show starts ves at the
ri
first vehicle artin Atkins
car park. -Mar
You have to be consiste
nt
evolving. -Howie Kaplan ly

Sound check is for chec

king
sounds. Shut up when
everyone else is checki
ng.
-Thor Harris
 Chapter 11 | THE SHOW 135

a good sound starts with good gear

T:S

lee popa
Get your sound before the show:
• Balance all of your sounds at your practice place.
• If your drummer is playing and you can’t hear him or her, your amp is too loud!
• If all you hear is drums, you’re not loud enough!
• Is your solo volume too loud? Does your clean sound match your dirty sound?

THE VOCAL MIC IS THE MOST IMPORTANT MIC ON THE STAGE: Treat it as such. Sorry,
no matter how good your amps and drums sound, if you drown out the singer you
have ruined the show.

STAGE FEEDBACK MEANS IT’S TOO LOUD: If the stage monitors feedback: you are too
loud for the system. The clearer you hear the vocal, the better the sound of everything.

PLAY A SOUND CHECK LIKE IT’S THE SHOW: If the drummer lays back at sound check
(plays quietly) then pounds at the show, you would be better off not sound checking.
Don’t lay back. Jump around and go for it so the settings you save at sound check
mean something!

SOFTER WILL MAKE YOU SOUND LOUDER: If the soundperson can’t hear you, they
will put more of you in the P.A. The smaller the sound on stage, the louder the band
is because the sound system is doing the work.

MARK YOUR SETTING DOWN: Get some tape and mark your settings. Don’t fool around with your knobs
during the show. If you do, chances are you will be turned down because your sound becomes erratic.

GOOD HELP IS HARD TO FIND: Respect the people that are helping you out. Learn the names of the people
and thank them after the show even if you think they did a bad job. They did the best they could.

NEVER YELL AT SOMEONE YOU DON’T PAY!

Start at the source with a good sound and it will be easy to get a good sound in the P.A.

Don’t mess around at sound

check and piss off everyone
with your petty concerns and
screw the other bands that are
waiting for their time.
T:S
Originally from Tour:Smart – Mark Durante
136 BAND:SMART

Sound People and Balance

Mark Rubel
Keeping in mind that sound is a major part of your audience’s overall experience, it
should be apparent that the sonics of your presentation are paramount. Unfortunately
many bands and venues are crippled by bad sound. In many ways, there’s nothing worse
than a partially trained and/or clueless sound person. Everything you do goes through
this filter, and an investment in training and communication will go far.

One problem is that people can get overly focused on their graphic EQ or how many
milliseconds the delay is set to, and completely miss the most important aspect of their
job — which, in my view, can be fairly succinctly stated:

Volumes:
a. Is it too loud overall, and if so what can be done?
b. Are the volumes balanced within the rhythm section?
c. How’s the balance between the rhythm section, vocals and lead instruments?
d. Are the solos coming up and down?
e. What’s the most important thing that’s happening now? Is it intelligible and at the
proper volume?
f. Can the musicians hear themselves? What do they need?

When on stage you should

be larger than life, when
off, you should be humble
and accommodating.
- #musicsolutions

Drummers: don’t tune your drums

after the doors have opened. EVER!
 Chapter 11 | THE SHOW 137

backup Everything!
tom vx
If you use Logic to run backing tracks, make sure to have a cd player and a
cd with an audio version of those tracks (in case the laptop is stolen, someone
spills beer on it, it gets set on an unshielded speaker and erased, run over by a
snowmobile, etc). Also, get an external drive, back up EVERYTHING before
the show/tour, and leave that drive at home... just in case.

Always always always have enough cables and direct boxes on hand to plug
all your gear into the house PA. Put all these little essentials into a road case
and then DUPLICATE THE ROADCASE. SERIOUSLY DOUBLE
EVERYTHING. Cables break, DI boxes get stolen, strings break, you lose a
gross of picks weekly, etc. Don’t ever force yourself into a corner by relying on
a single DI box or cable... That is just inviting disaster. And hey,

MARK EVERYTHING. PAINT IT PINK SO THE GUYS IN THE BAND

PLAYING AFTER YOU DON’T “ACCIDENTALLY” GRAB THEM.
Make a checklist for each case, and then an over all checklist. I cannot count
the times I have found a really nice, expensive snare drum at the club the next night, once we found a $2500
guitar amp head! 99 percent of the time we figure out who it belongs to and set it aside, but not everyone is
honest and nice. And besides, it’s great that your amp isn’t lost, but it’s not doing you any good in Chicago at
7pm when you are playing in Milwaukee at eight!

You have to make each show special and different.

Get yourself a sturdy case like a Pelican Case or whatever. Preferably one that locks. Spray paint it pink, cover it in stickers, wrap
bright tape around the handle, whatever you can do to make it easily identifiable from across the venue. Make this your everything
workbox. Neatly fill it with everything you need to do your job. Batteries, gaff tape, cables, picks, sticks, whatever. Just keep it well
appointed and ready for action. And make sure your gear is ready for action. Nothing like realizing the battery in your tuner is
dead after the second song. Especially after your over enthusiastic bass player just did a high kick into your headstock. Label your
cables, pedals, and anything else that could potentially walk away or be left behind.

TAKE GOOD CARE OF YOUR EQUIPMENT AND IT WILL TAKE GOOD CARE OF YOU!
– Casey Orr
138 BAND:SMART

Top 1O Live Sound Mistakes

Brad Pack

1 FEEDBACK. Hands down, the biggest problem you're likely to face when mixing live sound. As a live
sound engineer, you get paid to keep feedback from occurring by using a process known as gain staging.

2 LOW VOCAL LEVELS. The vocal is almost always the most important element in a song, so it generally
needs to be the most prominent in the mix. Many mixes suffer from low vocal levels for many reasons.
Sometimes the singer is just soft spoken. Sometimes the other artists are too loud. Sometimes it's a technical
issue with the mic or board. Just remember, you should never have to hunt for the vocal in a mix!

3 LOUD INSTRUMENTS. As we all know, sometimes musicians can be divas. This often causes volume
problems, as some musicians feel they need to be louder than everyone else in the band. Maybe the
drummer is beating the hell out the kit, maybe the bassist has too much sub, maybe the guitarist has his amp
too loud. Aside from creating more stage noise, this forces you to raise all of the other instruments in the
mix to compete. Try talking with the artists and explaining to them that their instrument is too loud for the
venue, and it's hurting the mix. If they turn down, you will have more control, and can make the band sound
better as a whole.

4 ARTISTS’ INCOMPETENCE. Sometimes the problem is the talent themselves. Bad mic technique is usually
the culprit here. Artists can accidentally cause feedback by pointing the mic at their stage wedge. Or,
as seen at pretty much every rap or punk show, an artist will sometimes cup the mic, which causes altered
frequency response and can result in feedback. Perhaps the singer keeps moving closer or further away from
the mic. Ultimately, the artist has to assume some responsibility for their sound by using proper mic technique.

5 BAD CABLES. This is a very common problem in live sound. Cables can go
bad at the drop of a hat, with little to no notice. Bad cables can cause loss of
volume, interference, or general noise. At worst, the cable won't work at all, and
will not pass a signal. Cables are usually one of the first things to check, as they go
bad frequently, and are easy to check and replace.

6 BAD MIC STANDS. Nothing is more frustrating than watching an artist fight
with a drooping mic stand on stage. Make sure that all of your stands are tightly
secured and firmly set on stage. If a mic starts drooping during a performance, the
artist rarely has a free hand to fix it, let alone the know-how. Another version of
this problem is the kung-fu death-grip. Be sure not to over tighten the stand. If
multiple people are using one stand, they will all need to adjust it to their height.
You don't want to have to run from FoH all the way up the stage and make the
audience wait while you lower a mic stand. That's just embarrassing for everyone...

7 BLOWN SPEAKER/BAD DRIVER. You should always test your system before
sound check. Drivers can blow relatively easily, and it will greatly alter the
sound of a speaker. This causes all sorts of problems like distortion, frequency
shifts, and overall noise.
 Chapter 11 | THE SHOW 139

8 PHANTOM POWER. This one is an easy one to fix, but a common problem none the less. Remember,
condenser mics require 48 volts of phantom power to operate. Although most live sound mics are
dynamic, we do use the occasional condenser. Don't forget to send phantom power,or you won't get a signal!

9 TALK BACK MIC. This one is another common mistake with an easy fix. During sound check you'll need
to communicate with the band via the talkback mic and stage wedges. However, after sound check you
should always remember to turn off your talk back mic, otherwise it will pick up the ambient noise in the
room, and send it to the wedges/mains where it will muddy up your mix.

10 MISCOMMUNICATION. Finally, one of the biggest problems in live sound is generally unsolvable:
miscommunication. Bands have a certain responsibility to prep you on what to expect when they
play at your venue. This usually includes a technical advance of the equipment they will be using, and a sound
check. Often times, the band will neglect to send out information ahead of time, and show up late (if at all)
to sound check. This forces you to think on your feet and gives you little to no time to prepare.

BUT IT WOULDN'T BE ANY FUN UNLESS EVERYTHING WENT HORRIBLY WRONG, RIGHT?

music technology & the

Contemporary band tips
phelan kane
MUSIC TECH ON STAGE
One of the areas that can make your band really stand out from the rest of the crowd is
to use music tech hardware & software on stage – no matter what style of music you play.
Software like Ableton’s Live, coupled with MIDI controllers, drum triggers and sampling
technology can really create a performance that is interactive and exciting. Make sure you
spend time in pre-production sessions getting it right before you hit the road. Rehearse
with the gear until it’s perfect. There’s so much you can do on stage with technology so
keep it simple, as things can easily get overcomplicated or breakdown during the gig. Be
prepared for any eventuality on stage. Make sure that the technology doesn't hinder your
performance — it's all about improving your show!
140 BAND:SMART

theatre/er
SOME PAGES ABOUT THE VISUALS
A band called Crossfire Choir had their debut show at the Court Tavern, New Brunswick, NJ. The bastards
had spent $150 on a beefed up PA system — the low end was magnificent. They seemed like they were ten
times better, more powerful than any other band that had played there — I wanted to scream, "Not fair!!
This is just a couple of plywood boxes on either side of the stage with a couple of 18” speakers in them!!"
But, smart as hell, a great strategic spend of money and a terrific first impression. WIN!

In the early 80’s I was touring with my three piece band Brian Brain — back in those days we were
playing at the same clubs as Bauhaus, Pete Shelley, R.E.M. and U2. We were each playing to 100 to 300
people tops.

People raved about Bauhaus's live show! They had their own light show! WOW. We’re not talking
TOOL’s last interactive digital screen synchronized EXPERIENCE here, we’re talking FOUR spotlights
placed on the floor used to see EVERY single act illuminated from the same angle. The four lights on the
floor created a huge impression and WORD OF MOUTH years later. It’s just like a new and wonderful
sexual position; put it on the floor and change the angle.

A huge inspiration for me was Alex Harvey. He went on to perform at Wembley Stadium in the UK –
but I saw him at Sunderland Locarno in 1975 performing to 200 people or so – back then they didn’t
have any money but I still remember the show.

$O
They had a song called “She Has a Hole in Her Stocking But She Keeps on Rocking” so,
he had a stocking around his neck and used it as a prop.

$2
The next song was ‘Framed,’ the title track from their first album. As he introduced the
song he stuffed the stocking into his cheeks and became the Godfather. He threw the
saliva-damp stocking into the crowd, I caught it and curled into a ball as I hit the deck –
clutching it as I was rained on with blows from the other eager fans.

$4
Alex had a thing for graffiti –he spray painted ‘Vambo Rules OK’ a gang he invented – over
a sheet draped over his bass amp. Later, in front of 1000 or so at Newcastle City Hall, he
spray-painted onto a polystyrene brick wall which he later crashed through.

$O
Towards the end of the show he climbed up the 10 foot high side truss of the club and
removed a spotlight and used it as a searchlight across the crowd and then used it as a prop,
kind of like a Halloween flashlight under the chin – just like Peter Murphy of Bauhaus –
changing the angle of the lights.

k e a s t a g e p lot and
Ma .
an input lisdt.
Be organize
 Chapter 11 | THE SHOW 141

OTHER NOTABLE THEATRE:

The keyboard player in Gravity Kills developed a robotic keyboard stand that enables him to flail all over
the keys like a puppet.

The drummer from Alex Harvey band and MGMT sets up sideways — you could see both his legs
working in a way I hadn’t seen before.

Peter Murphy’s mic stand had steps welded to the side.

Thompson Twins had umbrellas. Their stage show in the 80’s

features 7 or 8 white umbrellas which enhanced the reflection of the
regular club lights - and pack up easily!

The Orb had giant inflatable balloons used as screens to project

planets and more onto.

The Talking Heads' ledgendary show begins with just David Byrne on stage with a beat box for one or
two songs — the rest of the band is brought out one by one. Talk about building the show’s momentum!

At every Flaming Lips show the band uses theater to enhance the overall experience — rolling across
the crowd in an inflatable ball, directing giant laser filled hands to a mirror ball, showering confetti and
punching out balloons. BRILLIANT!

My band, Pigface, starts the show behind 8 8x 4 white screens hinged together to form a curtain…We
play the first 1 or 2 songs in silhouette. Building excitement and anticipation.

Stop gazing at your shoes. Put on

Treat your audience as if they were the a show. People go to see a show,
band and instead of being in the band not to hear a show. Watch a video
imagine you are fans of the audience. of your performance and do more
of the good stuff and less of the
lame stuff.

I think it’s good when someone in the

crowd can see your finger hit a key and
hear the sound you made by doing so. actually
To prepare my set sometimes I would
local bar and check out a dubstep nigh go to a
t, and how the dj’s play the crowd and
their reactions, and from that decided trigger
to focus more on what they weren’t
rather than what they were doing. My doing,
guess is there may be an infinite num
ways to use laptops for live performance ber of
s. The thing to concern yourself with
be reminding yourself that it’s ok to shou ld
go outside the norm when you are gett
electronic music in general. To keep ing into
it exciting, be a rule breaker. You can
electronic music equipment in ways use most
beyond its intended use, due to a little
original thinking. Those are where the creative
more exciting sounds are discovered.

– Bangalore Chris David

142 BAND:SMART

top 5 mistakes bands make

with their live show
tom jackson
I’m a Live Music Producer, and I’ve been working on artists’ shows for 20 years.
I do what a record producer does for the recording – but I go into rehearsal halls
and help artists get ready for their live shows, showcases, and tours.

I also get asked to speak at music conferences and colleges around the world
to teach my Live Music Method, which will help an artist get a vision for
their show, help them be more comfortable and spontaneous onstage, and
help them understand how to connect with an audience without changing who they are. It helps them get
prepared to work with me and my team.

Here are 5 big mistakes bands make with their live shows, in no particular order:

1 “WINGING IT” IS MISTAKEN FOR SPONTANEITY. I constantly run across the attitude of “Dude, I’ve got to
be spontaneous – I can’t rehearse my show!” Sometimes my reply is “Awesome – but if you really want to
be spontaneous, make up the song right in front of the audience… that’d be real awesome!”

They look at me like I’m crazy or have 2 heads. Because of course they practice the music, dynamics, tempo,
tones, melodies, and harmonies. They know those need to be right. And, if they’re a group, they work on
making the music really tight. But instead of learning the right way to be spontaneous onstage, they mistake
“winging it” for spontaneity! They jump around onstage and try different things, hoping something will
work. And here’s the irony – when they do something verbally, visually, or musically in front of the crowd
one night that gets a great response, they do that same thing the next night, too.

So where did the spontaneity go? They do the same thing they did the first night because it worked! That’s
because spontaneity and winging it are 2 different things. In fact, if we rehearse right, we will leave room for
spontaneity in our show.

Which brings me to the next mistake:

2 PRACTICE IS MISTAKEN FOR REHEARSAL. Artists know when they go into the recording studio, they
don’t lay down basic tracks, add a few sweeteners, and a scratch track vocally, then turn to the producer
and say, “Sounds great. Let’s get it to the manufacturer!” An artist who has any sense at all knows there’s more
to be done with the recording. You need a final mix. In fact, the mix can even make or break the song. It’s why
people like Grammy winner Al Schmitt get paid a stupid amount just to mix people’s songs.

But most artists don’t realize there is more to getting a live show ready than just “practicing” the music.
Rehearsal involves the musical, the visual, the verbal, the rearranging of songs that were written for radio so
they work live, and more.

120 people in a 100 capacity venue is a riot.

In a 500 capacity room, it’s a funeral.
 Chapter 11 | THE SHOW 143

Which brings us to mistake #3:

3 SONG ARRANGEMENTS INTENDED FOR RADIO ARE MISTAKENLY USED FOR LIVE SHOWS. Some of you
have heard me talk about the qualities of a sitcom for TV (22 min. of show + 8 min. of commercials =
sitcom). As a musician, our equivalent to a sitcom is a song for radio. We know the rules for getting played
on radio: 3-4 minutes long, a certain form, short intro, etc. But a live show and radio are 2 different things!

The Simpsons sitcom was made into a movie a few years ago. As a consumer, if you’d gone to the theater
and paid $10 for 22 minutes of show plus 8 minutes of commercials, you’d have felt cheated. Why? Your
expectations are different in a theater. Well, your audience’s expectations are different at a club or concert
hall than they are when they turn on a radio. If you play your songs just as they were recorded for radio,
you’re making a big mistake. Those songs need to be rearranged to create a compelling live show.

Not understanding the audience’s expectations is part of the 4th mistake:

4 ARTISTS ASSUME THE AUDIENCE WANTS THEM TO SING SONGS OR PLAY MUSIC. Audiences go to a
live concert for 3 reasons: to be captured & engaged, to experience moments, and to have their lives
changed in some way. As musicians, we make the mistake of thinking (partly because it’s us, our adrenaline is
flowing, and we’re playing our own music) that we are awesome onstage and there are “moments” all through
our songs. And there are – for us.

BUT WE NEED TO CREATE MOMENTS FOR OUR AUDIENCE!

That’s what a huge part of rehearsal is: finding the moments in the songs, and rearranging them so they
become moments for the audience (not just us). Living in Nashville, a huge part of the music industry is
still consumed with having a “hit song.” A hit song will compel people (usually listening on radio) to go to
iTunes or Google the artist to find the song… because it moved them emotionally. In other words, a hit song
is a “moment” that connects the listener emotionally to the artist. It’s a distinct craft and art. And it’s why the
best producers in the world get paid extraordinary sums to produce those hits for the artist!

But even well written songs don’t necessarily become hits. (If that were the case, the tens of 1000s of songs
written every year around the world that are well crafted, lyrically clever, and well arranged would all be
hits.) But here’s the good news: if you have a well written song, inside that song is usually a “moment!” You
as the artist know it! And the Live Music Producer’s job is to find that moment and help you deliver it in
your live show. But if you’re just playing songs, most people will miss those moments.

That’s why delivering a song live onstage is so important, and you shouldn’t make mistake #5:

5 ARTISTS’ SONGS ALL LOOK THE SAME, EVEN THOUGH THEY DON’T SOUND THE SAME. As an artist you
know your songs are all different. They have different themes, melodies, rhythms, and tones. They don’t
sound the same. But (for 95% of artists out there) they look the same. You need to be as creative with your
show as you are with your music. Communication with your audience is 15% content, 30% tone or emotion,
and 55% is what they see. So it can be a real problem if your songs all look the same, because to an audience
that doesn’t know who you are, your songs will start sounding the same. Most artists typically do the same
thing onstage over and over for every song: the same movement from the same place… big mistake!
144 BAND:SMART

Being Special on stage

josh white
• PERSONALITY ON STAGE. You might not be the best band in the world, but if you can interact with the
crowd without being a jerk, you’ll at least win friends if not fans.

• PASSION. You have to believe in the product you’re selling (which is your band!) - the crowd can spot fake
sincerity and we hate it.

• ORIGINALITY. You don’t have to have the most original music in the world, but do something original. A
band I saw last night were doing a fundraiser and created limited edition specialized merch as prizes. All
they did was make a crude stencil of their name and spray-painted it onto random things: slippers, a house
coat, an ashtray, a supersoaker...it was awesome.

If there’s a schtick in your act, make sure you can back it up with music. It’s great to wear funky costumes
and jump around like an idiot; but if the music sucks, you just look like a clown.

enjoying
Onstage look like you are
audience.
yourself — engage your
– Paul Benjamin
When you are onstage — you
have to get yourself in the
mindset that you are going to die
if you don’t play the songs! If you
don’t — your career is over.
– Kevin Lyman
Tell your audience what to do. If you don’t tell people what to do,
they won’t. But if you do, they likely will. So tell them — when you’re
on stage — that you have CDs for sale for $10 at your merch table,
and you’ll sign them after your set. You’ll sell a TON more product…
Every performance should be an and make a ton more money.
event, a spectacle that can’t be - Tony van Veen
missed, instead of just another gig.
– Punk Rock Panel, SDMT
 Chapter 11 | THE SHOW 145

stage wear
dj pleasure kitten
• Create a persona.
• Lead the market, don’t follow it!
• Set yourself apart from the audience with your look.
• Developing a look will give your band more credibility.
• Buy quality pieces – cheaper is not always better!
• Do your research! Understand the music you’re playing and the
style that goes with it before you start purchasing.
• Make sure your group has a comprehensive idea of what image you’re going for.

• Buy clothes that you feel like you look good in. If you don’t feel like you look good,
your confidence goes to hell and it WILL show in your performance.
• Start with a few core pieces. For example: 2 pairs of black rock-and-roll stretch jeans,
1 pair of blue rock-and-roll stretch jeans and a few shirts that you can mix and match
to create different looks. This allows you to build your image without a huge initial
investment.
• Have backups/alternate pieces on hand to replace items that may accidentally get
stained/damaged/smell like last night’s party; not every band has the luxury of
frequent laundry stops on the road... unless of course you enjoy smelling like a sock,
in which case — SOCK ON! — ( Just don’t hug me!) Wardrobe. There are no rules
anymore except for this:
Make sure that everyone in
TIP: A LITTLE FEBREEZE CAN GO A LONG WAY TO PREVENTING the band looks like they are
EXTREMELY FUNKY SMELLS. TO UP THE ANTE, CHOOSE A in the same band! Nothing
SCENTED FABRIC SOFTENER SHEET, AND USE IT TO LAYER worse than showing up with
three guys looking like they
IN BETWEEN YOUR CLOTHES IN YOUR BAG. could be in Nirvana, and the
• Cool accessories can take your outfit to the next level; Rings, bracelets, necklaces, belt fourth guy looks like he is in
buckles, etc. (See Keith Richards of The Rolling Stones) New Kids On The Block. If
• A couple of unique pieces added to your wardrobe can take you from a player to a
you don’t feel that you can
STAR!!!!....unless your band sucks, in which case your clothes are just waiting for your
do all this, hire a stylist, or at
music to catch up with it ;)
least find someone you know
who has style to help you.
– Paul Natkin

Never wear satin. You'll sweat right through it.

– Gwenith Paltrow (Country Strong)
146 BAND:SMART

lighting and staging

brenda siegelman
The first thing to keep in mind is that when people buy a ticket their expectation is to
see a band. Never mind that some venues say “This is a listening room “ to justify not
having any stage lighting. Just think about what happened when PiL played the Ritz
in NYC behind a movie screen. (Ask Martin). Unless the entire audience is blind, they
want to see you play. That’s what they came for.

Now you can hide your identity with masks, costumes, makeup, even chicken buckets on
your head - others have - but the crowd wants to see you play, so you need lighting. If
the club has none, your best defense is to bring a pair of clip on lights, equivalent of 200
Watts each, both with black cords, both with amber gels (you can get it at a music store),
on clips or clamps. These should be aimed across the front of the stage from at least six
and a half feet or higher. The Stage Lighting Store online will give you advice & tutorials. If you’re willing to
pay $40, you can get the par 38, which will look good and allow you to use screw in bulbs. If not, clamp on
work lights from your local hardware store will do until you get a pair of pars.

Remember that you are hanging lighting over peoples heads. Make sure they are secure. Buy a set of black
shoelaces and use them to neatly tie the cords. Get a couple of short chains (dog choker collars are good) and
a pair of carabiners. Wrap the chain around the light’s yoke and the bar you are hanging off of. Secure them
with the carabiners. Now you’re visible.

BRENDA’S STAGING TIPS

1 Think about your look. You may be dressed great, but how is the stage? Buy some black extension cords
and use them. If you have a power strip, that should be black too. If you don’t believe that this makes a
difference, start looking at live band photos. It makes a huge difference. Avoid ugly yellow, orange, white,
green and brown cords, as they say ‘amateur’ to everyone who sees them.

2 Do you have your amp propped up on a chair or on milkcrates? Buy some opaque black cotton. Buy two
2 yard pieces. Cover the chair or boxes neatly before putting your amp down. It looks great now. Do you
have a 6 foot piece left? Is the back wall really ugly? Take some double backed tape and hang the cloth on the
wall behind the drum kit. This also gives you a small background for a backdrop piece. If you don’t use the
black piece for the back wall, you can use it to cover the untidy pile of cases and jackets in the stage corner.
The whole mess disappears under black cloth.

3 Are you the opening act? Are you in a venue that has lights but does not focus them? Turn on the lights
before you set up. See where they hit. Set up so that you can be seen in the light. If you can’t tell from
looking at the lights, turn around and look at your shadow.

WHAT CREATES A SHADOW IS LIT. WHAT DOES NOT IS IN THE DARK.

While this may sound basic, not everyone does this. Be flexible, you may have to move a few inches from
where you normally stand.
 Chapter 11 | THE SHOW 147

4 If the venue you are playing has stage techs, communicate

with them nicely. Smile at them. They will help you if you
do not behave like jerks. Some techs aren’t happy with their gigs
and are just miserable, they may want to make you look bad —
don’t start a war over it.

Be sure to ask, “Will anyone be running the board for our set?” If so, let them know if you prefer bright