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Disaster Script

Disaster Script

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José Alfredo Huali Acho
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7K views151 pages

Disaster Script

Disaster Script

Uploaded by

José Alfredo Huali Acho
Copyright
© © All Rights Reserved
We take content rights seriously. If you suspect this is your content, claim it here.
Available Formats
Download as PDF or read online on Scribd
LisretTo Vocat Book By Seth Rudetsky and Jack Plotnick Concept created by Additional Material by Seth Rudetsky and Drew Geraci Drew Geraci NOTICE: DO NOT DEFACE! Should you finde necessary to mark cues or cus, use a sfe black lead pencl only NOT FOR SALE ‘This book i rented forthe period specified In your contract Ie remains the property of MTI MUSIC LIBRARY 3IA INDUSTRIAL PARK ROAD ‘Mone YaeresFeramanonat NEW HARTFORD, CT 06057 Ne York NY 10919 Copyright © MUSICAL NUMBERS act 1, Hot Sttt ta, Hot Stuf — Payot 2. The Lord's Payer 3. Theme From Mahogany, 4. Saturday Night. 4, Saturday Night ~ Playoft 5, Do You Want To Make Love? 6. Without You. 6a, Without You—Playof 7. Torn Between Two Lovers. 8. TAm Woman — Part 9. That's The Way 've Alay Heard It Should Be, 10, 1/Am Woman ~ Past 2. 20a.1 Am Woman ~ Payott 11, Mockingbird 12, Stl The One, 12a Stil The One ~ Playott. 13, Never Can Say Goodbye. 134,Never Can Say Goodbye ~ Playoft 12b.Wo's Death Underscore 1a. Feels So Good (Act One). 1b, Cocktail Masie Underscore ‘Me, Danger Undescore 15, Knock On Wood. 16, Hlawall Five. 10 10 18 7 20 3 35 2° 40 a 9 o 6 ” wo acta 17, Opening Act Two (Hawall Five-O / All Right Now), 1B, For Luck Seene Change 18a. Help Scene Change. 18b. Dick Bag Seene Change. 19, Three Times A Lady. 19a, Three Times A Lady ~ Playo 19b.Shisey’s Tourette's Scone Change 20, Ben, 20s. Ben — Play 20b.Swim Undencore. 21, Baby Hold On To Me 214. Tidal Wave Scene Change 22, 25 0r 6 Tos. 23, Sky High 2a Jake Warning — Seone Change. 24, When Will [Be Loved 25, Nadie Theme. 26, Don’t Cry Out Loud. 26a, Jako's Death ~ Scene Change 7. Come To Me 27a, Danger Underscore 2 28, Id Really Love Ta See You Tonight 28a, Really Lave To See You Tonight — Scene Change 29, 1 Will Survive. s Knock Three Times A Fifth OF Beethoven, You're Sil he One (Reprise). Reunited, Muskrat Love. Feels So Good (Act Two} Daybreak, Hooked On & Feeling 37. Bows 38, Bit Musle (Vever Can Say Goodbye). ry 14 a7 328 132 136 197 339 4 146 48 48 OPTIONAL OPENING SCENE PROLOGUE - THE SIDE OF A CASINO BOAT (“THE BARRACUDA”) AWORKMAN is igh in the air on seflding SFX: Tremor ‘The plasform shakes, He sets down his cam of ode and spe int his walki-talie WORKMAN 1 Hey! What's shaking this thing? Im 200 fet inthe ai WORKMAN 2 (0.8.) Probably construtios on the westside highway. WORKMAN 1 ‘The highway? If coming fom right underneath WORKMAN 2 (0.8.) ‘Who cates if i’s shaking? You're done, WORKMAN 1 1 ofl gotta gcure theboli WORKMAN 2 (0.8.) Forget it The boss says we're ina rush to open tonight WORKMAN 1 ‘They're ll comin’ lore It’s not safe unless — WORKMAN 2 (0.8.) You're donet SFX: Tremor It shates again WORKMAN 1 (to hms “That ai the West Side Highway SEX: Tremor “The platform shakes gai, and he il of i. at He able to grab the platform an hangs by his hands. His soda can ls off and plummets down, (WORKMAN 1) My Tab He goes to reac for SEX: Tremor fils to his death “The platform shakes again, and AAAAAAHHHH! OPTIONAL OPENING SCENE ENDS NEW YORK CITY APARTMENTS: ‘The intro fo “Ho! Stuf” begins and roe hear a 70's syle phone ringing. CHAD, a hendscne and winning young mun, i holng the receiver of his phone to hs ear. “Te action jump back and forth between too apariment SCOTT, same age but abit of «nerd, sin nd anstes his phone scorT Hallo? cHaD (eings) SITTNG HERE EATING MY HEART OUT ‘BABY, WAITING FOR SOME LOVER TO cat scorr Call one of your chicks cHaD DIALED ABOUT A THOUSAND NUMBERS LATELY, ALMOST RANG THE PHONE OFF THEWALLI scorr. Cant talk, man. Got a catering gig atthe Barracld cHAD The floating casine? scorr Yeah! It the grand opening so— cHaD Tell“em Im joining you scorr ‘Why? I'm just gorna be serving hors doevres— cHAD Yeahto a bunch of hot ladies. scorT [No way! When yout around gies teat me ike a ner cHAD How ‘bout I teach you some of my tricks? scorT For eal? What do éo? cHaD Lesson one, Repeat after me— (ings) 1M LOOKING FOR SOME HOT STUFB, BABY THIS EVENING UNEEDSOME Hor STUFF, BABY TONIGHT: (pater) You ty! Scot makwardly tres it scort IWANTSOME HOT STUFF BABY THS EVENING BOTH corns HAVE SOME HoT STUFF GOT TD HAVE SOME LOVE TONIGHT! The Barracuda floating casino oat, moored to the pier, and a Tne of people are twain fo get in TED, a serious, professorial type enters holding a baker and begins to knel in oer fo scoop tater fromthe river, (OPTIONAL ENTRANCE: Ted emerges from the water in ‘tetsu with Raker) JAKE, a security guard, stops him JAKE Hey! This pler’s not for public use, jacket (rte ‘As Tel spe, he pulls a ook ou of TED 1m Professor Ted Scheider, noted disaster expert and author ofthe el-published handbook “Disaster! Preparing for the Inevitable’ JAKE Yeah? Beat it TED 1 believe an enormeusly destructive geoyieal event is about to occur. My theory will be confirmed the sediment m extracting exceeds 100 degrees Celsius, ‘A temperate that high— : JAKE In English please TED (sings) YM LOOKING FOR SOME Ted points to ther ‘TED / ENSEMBLE HoTSTUFF TED BABY THIS EVENING- “Ted tries agin te Scoop water but Jake continually stops im NEED SOME TED / ENSEMBLE HOTSTUFF Disaster! TeD BABY TONIGHT. WANT SOME TED / ENSEMBLE orsTurt TED BABY THB EVENING. (GOTTA HAVE SOME HOT STUFF active WOMAN woalks by and Jae fllows her to the fine JAKE (tothe woman) (GOTTO HAVE YOUR LOVE TONIGHT. ite fake is distract, Te qi Scoops out water ad seks ony. TONY, an unserupubus but sometines arming man dressed in a tuxedo wns ut ofthe casino ad surveys the erwd. . n professional and focused enters and MARIANNE Mr, Delvecchio? Mr. Delveechio? rony (ongrs) Jesus Chat! Cart you see 'm— He turns ad sees het {oueve) tery. MARIANNE (not impressed) ‘Marianne Wilson, press Ihave afew questions TONY ey roe) Ye, its the largest asino on the Fast Coast that’s why we had to build this special pero tet to, And, "no" we don sail this beauty because — Imp Ms ‘One Apr 6 Ane Yes. you Fm ut The You MARIANNE to bypass New YorkSiate gambling laws, the casino only has to ot be on land. TONY Impressive, Miss Wise. MARIANNE Ms, Wson. TONY One of those huh? Wal lke a challenge MARIANNE “Apparently. Your fathers real estate developer, Tony DelVecchio senior, correct? TONY (points to her chest) And those are rel, comect? MARIANNE, (fustered) ‘Yes, NO! He recently told the Wall Steet Journal thet in order for you to pay back your three milion dlls loan your easino wil have to be sold out fr the next year TONY {mano worried. We're already filled way beyond capacity : MARIANNE But that's dangerous, TONY ‘They don’t seem to mind. Various sexy men and somen walk past them join the fine into the csino, ENSEMBLE Goings) LOOKIN FOR A LOVER WHO NEEDS ANOTHER DON'T WANT ANOTHER NIGHT ON MY OWN [WANNASHARE MY LOVE WITH A WARM-BLOODED LOVER WANNA BRING A WILD ONE BACK HOME. MARIANNE Your father also said— TONY (auddenty emotional) haven't apoken to daddy. (THEN) (roxy) My fatter and Lar Tonge on speaking terms, Hers aVIP ket, Why dort we finish this interview aboard, Miss Wilson. MARIANNE Me, Wilson, TONY Cover drinks MARIANNE (Oh, but L don't dr— Tony pushes er ito the csi, and en grabs chef who hs jus exited the asin. TONY Chet! What the hell is going on? CHEF What, si? : TONY {just save the menus This isthe biggest event New York as ever seen Ica’ have ‘you serving just bri, gazpacho, cold cuts. CHEF But 2 kitchen has no fire doors, We eannot use 26 gas ovens. TONY Says wha? CHEF Zesaety inspector. TONY handled him! Now, go make some rel food and get rd ofthat cold buffet! CHEF TONY (ang) YM LOOKING FOR SOME TONY / ENSEMBLE HOT STUFF TONY BABY THIS BVENING— ENED SOME TONY / ENSEMBLE Hor STU TONY BABY TONIGHT. CHEF EWANT SOME CHEE / ENSEMBLE HoT sTUurF CHEF BABY THIS EVENING. ‘The chef ns back inside, Two attractive woman approach Tony. TONY GOTTA HAVE SOME HOT STUFF GOTTA HAVE YOUR LOVE TONIUHtE ALL. HOT, HOT, HOT, HOT, STUFF HOT HOTHOT HOT, HOL HOT, HOT, STUFF HOT, HOT. HOT (Cha and Soot reenter YM LOOKIN’ FOR SOME HOTSTUFR, BABY THIS EVENING | NEED SOME HOT STUFF BABY TONIGHT. 1 WANTSOME HOT STUFF BABY THIS EVENING (GOTTA HAVE SOME HOT STUFF (GOT TO HAVE SOME LOVE TONIGHT TONY NEED ‘TONY / ENSEMBLE HoT STUFF cHAD LOOKIN’ FOR CHAD / ENSEMBLE HOTSTUFE Ted ener ranahng the becker TED ROUND ‘TED / ENSEMBLE HOTSTUFFI Prisco io Uil “hey exit and SISTER MAR} smoker omar mun’ Peeezeticiovere SISTER MARY (ings) (OUR FATIIER WHO ART IN HEAVEN, HA“ LOWED BE THY NAME, "THY KINGDOM COME, ONFARTHAS 17 ISIN HEAVEN, (callout want) Gambling isa sin |AWOMAN enters and hends tard te ine, Sister Mary stops herby handing tera yer rater ffi You're going to hell, The oman was ey Have nic day Jak approche JAKE This is private property. SISTER MARY ‘While your floating den of sin certainly is this pier Is not. JAKE eat it He barely pushes he and she il imply fo the ground. SISTER MARY cont (Chad and Scat areas ad Chad rushes oh. cHAD Let me help you, Sister, He helps her to her fet SISTER MARY Thank you, young man. cHaD You alight? SISTER MARY Yes, I~ SHIRLEY and MAURY, late 50's looobly jolly couple dressed tacky, enter. SHIRLEY (Ob! You poor thing, scort ‘Cmon, we're gonna be ate! ‘Scot and Chex into the sino. SHIRLEY ‘Ym Shirley and this s my husband Maury. SISTER MARY 1'm Sister Mary Downy, rom the Convent of St, Francs, MAURY ‘Wee Maury and Shirley Summers from the ast stop onthe R tain. SHIRLEY (laughs) Oh, Maury! MAURY “Tonights our fest night of celebrating ve SHIRLEY He just sold the newspaper stand, Worked there 35 years! ‘ MAURY Thats right! I put inmy time, and now we're gonna live! Right, Shie!? SHIRLEY (hal heartedly) Yeah, lve (HEN) Go inside, Masry. FW help the Sister Mur exits nt csi SISTER MARY Thankyou. Wel gues be going SHIRLEY : Fa uty? You have so many beaut yr ef teling pope they (STARTS READING) bing to bum in et” SISTER MARY ‘The truths, Ieant do much good work out here, Everyone's inside a SHIRLEY Well why don’t youcome in? ss SISTER MARY you Tean' afford tcke;, Amun takes a vow of poverty. SHIRLEY Ne | dont know much about nuns, bat I sure could use some brownie points upstair. Fast. Let me buy yea ticket and you can save soul inside i SISTER MARY Wy thank yout But, i you'ne going to spend your maney, spend it onthe orphans They need itso much more. Fin SHIRLEY rm buying you a teket, and that’s that SISTER MARY ‘Thave other reasoe for not wanting to go inside. SHIRLEY You'l tell me later (HANDS HER $100 BIL) Well soe you inside! ley eit int the casino Sister Mary stares a he bil in he hand, mesmerized and frightened SISTER MARY (ange) GIVE US TH DAY OUR DAILY BREAD, FORGIVE USOUR TRESPASSES ‘She snes he il, ewphorally AS WE FORGIVE THOSE WHO TRESPASS AGAINST US FORGIVE US OUR TRESPASSES (spats) Father, forgive met Sister Mary exits nto the easna LEVORA, aflamboyent and glamorous worn witha large fro, aries on the per wing cased ty an out of brenth TAXT DRIVER. TAXI DRIVER Matar! When you take acab ride, you have to pay LevoRA You just gave a ride to Levora Verona, disco star and queen ofthe airwaves, That's your payme TAXI DRIVER No. My payment should be 6 bucks and 25 cents, Plus a dalla fr what your dog sin my backseat! He points tothe dog wh sits in Levor's purse LEVORA Pine (RIFLES THROUGH PURSE) {rm sure Ihave tin here somewhere - Disasren "A.COUPLE entr, ea holding cone of cotton candy. As they passin front of | teora nd whi he Taxi Driver is looking may, Levoa grabs the coupe and ips her eal non been the cotton candies so dat he afro foks like anor eaton andy. ‘Tha cab driver turns bac, end is confsed. TAXI DRIVER ‘Where'd she go? Prise or S05 io the casino — The music vam begins as the couple ex LEVORA (atking to her deg) ‘oh, Baby, what hs become of us? The hits deed up a couple of bad investments Ci now we're siffng eab drivers? Levora.. where is your if headed? (ings) DO YOU KNOW WHERE YOU'RE GOING TO? ‘pO YOU LIKE THE THINGS THAT LIFE IS SHOWING YOU? WHERE ARE YOU GOING T0? BO YOU KNOW? DO YOU GET WHAT YOUKE HOPING FOR? WHEN YOU LOOK BEHIND YOU= As she titer looks behind herself hei surprised to see the driver co as stuck tack up to herand is engrly fuming. au ‘She takes off ring tothe font of he Kine. Jak lets erin, but stops Taxi Dries toh exits angrily. (OPTIONAL Len in ine, darts bk in.) ra pops ou agen, grabs a vottan candy from the couple who aes COUPLE Hey! JACKIE'S DRESSING ROOM JACKAE, a aging but sil sexy lounge singer, is ina obe and priming TONY (0.8.) Jackie! You're on in te minutes! JACKIE Hey hey! (NOTE: Every time Jee says “Hey hey!” she dows her signature move of to fn {fsepumps into the as) BEN, en 11 year od, nlersweeing a fathered mask that lots like abn’ face. BEN Mommy, Lisa told me “Sit on it!” JACKIE Ben, take that off (HE REMOVES THE MASK) ‘You and Lise promised if Het you come you'd get along for one night! BEN (eating ofetnge) Lisa Mommy says you look lke Horshack! He nes of. JACKIE Bent 5 LISA (0.8.) 1 do not! JACKIE (calling ofstage) You're twins! If she looks ike Horshack, then so do you! LISA enters. 1's thesame boy actor who plays “Ben”, but now wearing a wig LISA We dont look anything alike! JACKIE Please stop, Lise! Tonight's «very important night for us LISA, Why? JACKIE Because tonight we may finally bea family again! usa Daddy is coming back? JACKIE Which daddy? I LISA Thelast one JACKIE Ban? No, Barry’s gone for gong. And Max and Steve. They were bullies and ‘heats, jut lke your teal Daddy, Now, her's the big news. Tony said that if uerything goes parfecly tonight he will ask me to marry him... resi! Lisa, (excite) Possibly? JACKIE (nodding proudly) Possibly! Ince otc Lisa rn off x Ty eters behind er TONY Jackle! You ready? Tony sees a scuf on his show, and knees down to wipe it off Jackie sur and JACKIE (ecstatic) (Ob, Tony YES! He stands up, nonplused TONY Great. Get ou JACKIE Huh? Ben enters witha Lite-Brite toy. BEN Mr. Delvechio? JACKIE [Not now, Ben! BEN Look what I made with my Lite-Brite He holds it wp for them see, Chas colon image TONY disinterested) ooh. JACKIE (Ot Ws the Barracuda! BEN (pointing) That's the engine room, that's the chief engineers office thats — SEX: Tremor ‘They are all momentarily tron off balance by the tremor. Wen fats ro he ground. Mommy! JACKIE (els ofstge) List Are you okay? “The str plying “Ben” has turned ie bck tthe audience and sis eoice LISA (0.5.) Yes Momny. JACKIE “Tony wy did the rom jst shake? TONY Contraction onthe WestSide Highway. BEN (ovina) Mom! The Lite-Brite pies are ot in the shag carpeting JACKIE Ben, don't ery. + TONY (ooothingly) Vithandle t JACKIE ‘Thank you, Toy. TONY (euddenly yells) ‘Stop erying! 1M pile that kinda junk with ny old man he woulda! ll Jackie interrupts Toy efor he its Ben = JACKIE (all sites) . Perfect! Um Ben, do your homework and forge the Lite-Brite BEN Fine! Ben picks up pad of paper anda penile ends afoud what he iswriting. “what IDid This Weekend, Thad the absolute wort Sa." Mom, how do you spell “Seturday night”? JACKIE ee Bent You know how to spell “night, and you can sound out “Saturday — Jost tell me how to spell it JACKIE (lozen) He Saturday. night BEN ‘What? JACKIE a) (in chyton) S-ACPURD-AY... NIGHT! TONY ji You're ont bine k Je sorrtey Nit al cAsINO ‘The casino is revealed There is large sign that rends “Casino”. ALL TONY (0.8.) SATLU-RD-AY..NIGHT! ‘The Barracuda presents nightclub SATURDAY. NIGHT! fixture, Jackie Noelle! SATURDAY. NIGHT! SATURDAY. NIGHT! Jacki appears om the casina stage ina glamorous outfit. JACKIE Hey hey! (snes) GONNA KEEP ON DANCIN’ 10 THE ROCK [AND RO:1LON SATURDAY NIGHT. ey Hey! SATURDAY NIGHT: ENSEMBLE (ccs her catch it pms) Hey, hey! JACKIE DANCIN’ TO THE MUSIC IN OUR HEART [AND SOUL ON SATURDAY NIGHT ENSEMBLE Hey hey! 5 JACKIE SATURDAY NIGHT ENSEMBLE Hey, hey! JACKIE HIT EAyUSt CANT Warr IIT1GOr A DATE Line Dancot Jckie andthe crowd doa line dance — [AT THBS0OD OLE ROCK AND ROLL ROAD SHOW, IGOTTAO. ALL “SATURDAY NIGHT, SATURDAY NIGHT JACKIE GONNA ROCK IT UF, ROLL ITUP, DOIPALL, HAVEABALL, ALL SATURDAY NIGHT. SATURDAY NIGHT. I ENSEMBLE Nicht JACKIE ENSEMBLE SSSSATURDAYNIGHT 4 NIGHT 5S SSATURDAYNIGHT Nicht SSSSATURDAY ALL SATURD-AY..NIGHT! SATURD-AY..NIGHT ANOTHER PART OF THE CASINO - CONTINUOUS: Chad and Scott ener in caer water uniforms, each holding a tay of drinks. Chad Starts fo approach pretty YOUNG WOMAN. scorr (Chea! We're not supposed to fraterize with the— cHAD What's your sign, pretty lady? YOUNG WOMAN 1 (pirty Virgo. cHAD “The virgin, hub? YOUNG WOMAN 1 Vil never tell ‘She walks ony, ggting uh The cor at You' a wel, (to Seat) Now yous try it Scot approaches anoier, mc less interested, young roman. scorr Uh. what's your sige? YOUNG WOMAN 2 Torus scorr ‘The virgin, hub? YOUNG WOMAN 2 No. scorr Crying to vei) ‘Cancer, Tama cancer I don’t have cancer. [thought I did but the doctor told me that i's normal for one tobe bigger than the ther, S0. He goesin jor a kiss, She walks many, digust cHAD (comforting) You'll gt it, man ‘They exit and Jaci continues her song momentarily. JACKIE / ENSEMBLE SATURD-AY..NIGHT SATURD-AY..NIGHT ony enters, followed by a ery focused Te TONY Anearthquake? How? TED You've drilled ths ior diretly into a aul line TONY (all harm) ‘Well, wel e not on the ple. a2 - Disasrert TED ut the casino is otha to the per and your guess will soon cause their own deaths TONY (disbeioving) How are my guests going to trigger an earthquake? : TED Ev | Vibrations! TONY | From? by TED The Hustle! ‘The Bump! ve (POINTS TO SOMEONE FREB-STYLING) ‘tat! very funky dance move shakes the pier which will soon cause the fault ine tosnap. TONY You've lost me, Professor. TED ‘You need to get everyone ofthis casino, TONY ‘Are you crazy? TED No. The doctors said that “humorless” is not the same thing as “ery TONY Profescar, you arenot going 4 run this night for me. ‘TED Everyone here wil dle unless— TONY Keep your voice down! TED You've got to lates to me! JACKIE ALL EEL JUST CAN'T WATT [ELL 000 TONY Get the hell ff ny ship! Disaster! oo JACKIE ALL LL GOT ADATE bent AH Tomy str to crag Tet off but Ted sip out of his grasp and rns onto Jackie's stage, grabbing her microphone TED very dance move brings you closer to death! “Tony takes the micropion®, TONY Bveryone dance! Dance the night away! ALL Yeaht I! Tony grabs Te and ects him from the casino JACKIE [AP-THE GOOD OL ROCK AND ROLL ROAD SHOW IGOTTAGO ALL ‘SATURDAY NIGHT, SATURDAY NIGHT. JACKIE GONNA ROCK IF UP ROLLITUP, OTT ALL, HAVE A BALL ALL ‘SATURDAY NIGHT, ’ SATURDAY NIGHT. JACKIE ALL SATURDAY NIGHT SAPURD.AY..NIGHT SATURDAY NIGHT SATURD-AY..NIGHT! $5. SATURDAY NIGHT SATURD-AY..NIGHT! SATUR JACKIE & WOMEN MEN SATURDAY NIGHT SATURDAY NIGHT S$S-SATURDAY NIGHT! SATURDAY SATURDAY SSS-SATURDAY NIGHT! NIGHT SATURDAY NIGHT Ted reenter from wlee he was throon off runs across to te ote side, and oftage. ‘Tony sees and chases afer him. Aue 9 SATURDAY 1 i JACKIE ALL seer i saTURDAY NIGH saruRDAY Nici 1 that oo« cone ine os, on Sey ond Mary etn i 1 MauRY shit Ya gota Hck up your fet when you do the congal SHIRLEY {mbuming up, May Gove Tey step oof ine and Chad wala by st MAURY Yourg man, whas yur ramet Holy ‘CHAD a Chad Wat MAURY chad, would you getmy lovely wile nice ol Preset : they, cuap Tay You go Chad exits 1 SHIRLEY Actual never min Maury. tm suddenly fing very ok Whi MAURY Fin get yous Sanka, Hu Maury ext Neve smiRLEY come So, th VW hen cold Plase ett not bea symptom of (sinues 1 oFB You know what, it’s probably just menopause. Alig Shirley turns and is surprise to find Sister Mary standing right next her (SHIRLEY) Sorry sister SISTER MARY “That's alright Shir, You can say menopause in font of me, I know what iis SHIRLEY Good. SISTER MARY (One of God's many punishments towards women. Well it's time for some sou! saving SHIRLEY Good luck. m gonna hit the oY” one-armed bandit. ‘Shirley approaches a sot machine. SISTER MARY Holy Mary Mother of God! Thats not just any slot machine... thats the new lari Five-O" themed TX420. SHIRLEY What? SISTER MARY They'te made in Monaco and they're top ofthe line, They use quarters instead of nickels and payout inthe thousand. SHIRLEY How do you know so much about slot machines? SISTER MARY common knowledge What? Th SHIRLEY x before you were Nun, did you ever— SISTER MARY Never. F've always wanted to bea Nun and I've always loved Jess. SHIRLEY there wasn’t any tine you strayed. SISTER MARY What do you mean? Inever had a gambling addition! SHIRLEY Hoh, Listen Si All ight SISTER MARY (rm Alte Thy eit separate anys \ ony enters ley Marine. MARIANNE Mr. Delvecciot 1 TONY Migs Wilson, MARIANNE Ms, Wilson — TONY ‘Are you enjoying my casino? MARIANNE ‘No. Well that’s no: why Yim here. Ianted to ask you~ He starts eng her aay. TONY How ‘bout those d:inks? MARIANNE 1 don’t drink TONY ‘Well then just some tequila shots MARIANNE ‘Thats the same— TONY Ws mote private in here. ee ee ae t TONY'S OFFICE ‘They ari ta lrge fo lank containing several pranas (puppets) MARIANNE Rumor has it you havea trap door installed on the bottom ofthis ship to dump legal contraband, TONY No trap door lite lady but checkout this aquarium, Abel Bue fs appears ‘The most topical fish ths side ofthe Equator, MARIANNE. on ‘The fic attacked ant ent by the pi ont TONY (charming) Wiel he interview is oven, How out you and I= MARIANNE {have many more questions! : TONY And have ast one question. (ang) DO YOU WANNA MAKE LOVE? MARIANNE What? Not TONY (OR DO YOU JUST WANNA FOOL AROUND? MARIANNE Thay’ ze the same thing. TONY 1 GUARANTEE ITLL BRING YOU DOWN IF YOU TRY AND FOOL YOURSELE. - 28 - Disasrent MARIANNE {ae you ta tg ye " | roxy MARIANNE . | | ron ‘OR DO YOU JUST WANNA FOOL AROUND? " I MARIANNE Per odie roxy * MARIANNE rhepnetae cme le Th they othe Kh? } hee ice, Toy re eo } a Tox | « fo MARIANNE (hac to busines) 1 like tose if the kitchen doors are fire;proofed | TONY Thscarn as ben thorough sey nope. x MARTANNE Mysore ain you ran ot of mney ding consrction and hao et cores bx TONY | The sft ispsor— foc MARIANNE } ™ (on the attack) was bribe. TONY Miss Wilson—! MARIANNE Ms. Wilson and T was able to geta copy ofthe frst safety report before you changed TONY (nervously) Waiter! Cad enters wth ra of drinks, MARIANN TONY You're so desperate to pay back your loan, Give me one of those you're not concemed with— cHAD Ma'am? MARIANNE (curprised) chad! cHAD (exrprised) Marianne?! ‘TONY Ant You two snow eck ther? Why dont you catch ip? Tony exits pane They seem ustere, but happy tose eachother MARIANNE 5 great to se you cHAD ‘Yeah, you too. MARIANNE (can you talk? cHaD may not? Let me just gt rd ofthese drinks ir Fe was axuy and pushes open a dor to the— BATHROOM - CONTINUOUS 5 SFX: Toilet uh & Jet exits as Ohad enters Hap (can) = (aings, suddenly melancholy) ICANT LIVE | IFLIVIN’ IS WITHOUT YOU. | CAN'T GIVE, CAN'T GIVE ANYMORE ' ‘He dumps the tay and drinks in a garbage cm, SFX: Crh TeANTLIVE! 1W LIVIN’ Is WITHOUT YOU. ICANT GIVE ICANT GIVE ANYMORE He reenter the kitchen, KITCHEN - CONTINUOUS cHAD (cack to upbeat j Hey! | MARIANNE, | 5... you're | cHap | Yeah MARIANNE ‘But you'ze still working on those projects, right? Tused to Tove the games and puzzles you'd ceme up with, cHap | 1 don’t have time for that anymore t a * % % a MARIANNE But you were so creative! I thought you would have invented the next Stinky by cHap (cheerfuly) Nothing I made ever sod, (POINTS TO HER NAME TAG) ‘0, you work forthe Times? MARIANNE (rucflly) Covering garden parties and socal events. But finally havea lea na story tonight that could change everything for me. cHAD Good for you! MARIANNE Chad... 'm sony... | probably should have sid something firs instead of just not showing up atthe chapel, Ancient history. : MARIANNE Is justo. ould’ Bea wife, Twanted a carver — cHaD So, it looks like we're beth happier now. MARIANNE * (justered) Yeah, weare. Lam. Heppy! (rause) ‘Yu knows Idi call you the next ay. "TRACI, a pretty WAITRESS, approaches with wine Bil ona try. TRACI Chad! “Breaks almost over! cHaD ‘Thanks, Tae TRACI “Why are you standing see alone? ae Disasree! 4 He gestures te Marianne. ‘Wel, mon asignment \ cHAD ‘Good seeing yeu again, Marianne. MARIANNE Yes, Chad, . (GRABS BOTTLE OFF TRAY) Thanks Trach Marianne ext . Chef enters CHEF You two! Back on 2 floor! cHAD (to Tac) ‘Let me justi he jb frst He renters the bathroom. BATHROOM - CONTINUOUS (ang) NO, {CAN'T FORGET THIS EVENING (OR YOUR FACE AS YOU WERE LEAVING, ‘DUT, GUESS THAT'S JUST THE WAY THE STORY GOES. (to himself nto the mirror) ‘YOU ALWAYS SMILE BUT IN YOUR EYES ‘YOUR SORROW SHOWS. YES, I SHOWS. Helens oxt the bathroom door (cua) ey, Traci Il meet ya back at the bar! ‘TRACI aire) Bye, Chad! He leans back cap ICANT LIVE! IFLIVING B WITHOUT YOU! IcaNT GUE CAN'T GIVE ANYMORE! Heals this nes TeAN TIVE! IFLIVING 5 WITHOUT YOU! ICANT GWE! CAN'T GE ANYMORE! He ay lato Bs back ICANT LIVE! SFX: Tle use Scot enters from sta scorT Hey, Chad jumps up cHAD Hey, Did you hear any of that? scort No. Scot indicates the ole tal he just eft. Did you hear any of tha? cHaD Brenk’s over! Perceevitowt von Tui) ont the (Cha pulls hb CASINO Lecora pushes pas them, end then awoiles to get fo the slot machine which Sister Mary i standing LEVORA Move it honkies. Giae room, missy. Out of my way, sister. (SEES IT'S ANUN) Sister SISTER MARY Ina rush to gett hell? LEVORA Do you know who you're taking fo? Levora Verona, disc diva SISTER MARY. We're not allowed to ston to secular— LEVORA even a0” everybody knovrs “Makin’ Sweet Sweet Love"? SISTER MARY Wel No, because, aI old you. LEVORA “Your Body On My Body?” Miss Verona, the convent— LEVORA ‘Do That Nasty Thang?” SISTER MARY What sa “thang”? LEVORA How about... "Patt Where I Want 1" SISTER MARY [Not No. Idon't krow any of those “songs”. This is what I know. (cing, strumming guitar) (OUR =ATHER- Levora’s dog bark (voiced by theatres) Stor Yes, @ Vm le sh rb them again ae Jesus! a Te (in = 35 LEVORA ear bark’) Stop! My baby is allergic to an outo-tune instrument. SISTER MARY Yes, but ‘She strom again ad Baby ys LEVORA ark) rm outta here Levora eit SFX: Coin drops toe floor SISTER MARY Hey, Miss Rude Lady! (PICKS UP THE CCIN) You dropped a quarter. oh forget it, If be a nie addition tothe orphans fund. She turns back and feces the sight ofthe machine ribet she was planning on using this onthe TX-420, Boy, you can win big on that one. Tea just imagine the orphan’s faces if walked in with a pile of money for them, Well they'Tjus: have to make die with a quarter: Instead of the thousands 1 ‘ould win.,INo! Tmade ¢ vow I would love only God and never love gambling again, But (LOOKS UPWARD! Jesusl (LOOKS TO THE MA CHINE) 201 TORN BETWEEN TWO LOVERS, FEELING LIKE A FOOL. LOVING BOTH OF YOU IS BREAKIN ALL TH RULES (SISTER MARY) “TORN BETWEEN TWO LOVERS. FERLIN’ LIKE A FOOL LOVIN’ YOU BOTH IS BREAKIN ALL THE RULES, | SPX: Tremor ‘As Sister exits, she reacts to the tremor, sui HALLWAY Marie stumbles om pity with the wine bottle. Shei drunks Lisa holding dln her a approaches. LISA ‘Why does the boat keep shaking? MARIANNE 1 did’ fel anything She takes final swig ad throws the botleoftge SFX: Botte Shavers Lisa, 1m Lis, MARIANNE | How od are you? Lisa leven. And so is my stupa twin brother. He ripped Betsey Wetsey’s head off isa holds the hen ofthe ll none hand andthe Boy inte othe MARIANNE Forget your brother! In fc forge all men! ‘Marianne grabs the head ond throws it ofage SFX: Crash Now, Fm gonna ask you a question nobody asked me wiven Twas a gil: what do you want tobe when you grow up? LISA What else? A wife MARIANNE No! I meant a profession! lawyer, a doctor. usa, Armother, MARIANNE Not Lisa, Bat my Mommy says amiy isthe most important thing in the whole world i: = 38 - Disasrer! MARIANNE she most important thing in the word is you. And being everything you can be. A strong, independext career woman, Single (GETTING MORE DEPRESSED) By hersel | cena) Alslone { LISA Mafam? Are you MARIANNE interuptin (sings) VIOMAN, HEAR ME ROAR [IN NUMBERS TOO BIG TO IGNORE [AND I KNOW TOO MUCH TO GO BACK TO PRETEND "CAUSE I'VE HEARD IT ALL BEFORE [AND I'VE BEEN DOWN THERE ON THE FLOOR NO ONE'S EVER GONNA KEEP ME DOWN AGAIN (OE YES, AM WISE BUTTS WISDOM BORN OF PAIN, YES, PAID THE PRICE, SUT LOOK HOW MUCH I'VE GAINED. IF HAVE TO, [CAN DO ANYTHING. LAM STRONG, LAM INVINCIBLE, 1AM WOMAN! LISA So you're not gelling marred ‘cause of your carer MARIANNE 2 Right, My cares, You are correct. Lisa Is there any other reason why you don’t want to get marted? MARIANNE Absolutely nt Lisa, Oh, Okay Suey — MARIANNE (oomberly sing) My FATHER SITS AT NIGHT WITHNO LIGHTS ON IS CIGARETTE GLOWS IN THE DARK "THE LIVING ROOM IS STILL [WALK BY,NO REMARK don't make a remaek??72 MARIANNE | TIPTOR PAST THE MASTER BEDROOM [WHERE MY MOTHER READS HER MAGAZINES HEAR RR CALL SWEET DREAMS | BUT I FORGET HOW TO DREAM. usa | ig anyone ever ask youto marry them? . MARIANNE Sere did LISA What'd you say? MARIANNE [said what Iwas supposed to say, (sings) SOYOU SAY IT'S TIME WE MOVED IN TOGETHER AND RAISED A FAMILY OF OUR OWN, YOU AND ME. = 40 - Disasrext | (MARIANNE) | WELL, THATS THE WAY I'VE AL [HEARD IT SHOULD BE ‘YOU WANT TO MARRY ME, WELL MARRY By thee of is prs, she has her arm igi eed Lis, and ets ered om Liss ed “Thr isi | 1 LISA | (anconfray) Anya. < MARIANNE Tm sory... what was I saying? OR, right! (sings with frvor) TAM WOMAN WATCH ME GROW ‘SB ME STANDING TOE TO TOE ‘9S ISPREAD MY LOVIN’ ARMS ACROSS THE LAND. (opens) sing! Lisa, UTM STILLAN EMBRYO WITH A LONG LONG WAY TO. GO [UNTIL I MAKE MY BROTHER UNDERSTAND MARIANNE FEMALE ENSEMBLE (0.5.) OF YES TAM WISE ‘YES AM WISE MARIANNE (grabe Lise fly) SUTII'S WISDOM BORN OF PAIN LISA Disasrent sae MARIANNE FEMALE ENSEMBLE (0.5.) ‘YES, I'VE PAID THE PRICE YES PAID THE PRICE BUT LOOK HOW MUCH I GAINED IF LHHAVE TO HAVEN CAN DO ANYTHING ANYTHING LAMSTRONG LISA & FEMALE ENSEMBLE (0.S.) STRONG! MARIANNE LAM INVINCIBLE LISA & FEMALE ENSEMBLE (0.S.) | sone MARIANNE ae = a . a eer oe | *LISA/ MARIANNE | HEAR MB 2048! Pn 15 OF ENSEMBLE (3 WOMEN) TAM WOMAN, WOMAN, WOMAN. HEAR MEROAR! HEAR MEROAR! eset iy need to coo i 1 JACKIE'S DRESSING ROOM ; | Be stor in | Ea BEN | | Mom! Lisa just called me a male chauvinist pig! i ! : ° TED JACKIE TED rife) there is an emergency situation —! (Oh! What are you doing my dressing room?! Kids, ean! BEN Mom, relax. t's Professoe Ted Scheider I read about him in Dynamite magazine Ben offers his and for Tet “lap hi ie” TED ‘Actually it was ghlight. Slap me f— Ben wales oy disinterested fm here because — JACKIE “Wnt I saw that a the pearls office. You're marred to Dr. Wo-Ching Lee, right? BEN inter of fly) Not anymore, She died on their honeymoon. JACKIE Ben! (ro TD) Ym o sory, [ust look atthe pictures. TED I allright, 1became a dsaster expert because of Wo-Ching’.. Wo's death at the JACKIE Well when ife hands you lemons. Pause Are you here because a voleano's about to explode? (to Ben) (OF course not (to Jaki) BEN TED “Thor's going to bean enormous earthquake, JACKIE Barthquake! No! ‘This night has to go perfectly! ‘The piri already buckling! I'm lifeboat! Two minutes, Jackie! ‘That's Tony. My tance, Possibly He threw me off the ship! Ihe sees me, never get tothe captain! Professor Scheider? Not now, Bent ell the captain! Ben! Ben runs off (calls fer) “Thats very brave, Ben. (el ofstage) Lisa, you stay here! TED aying to get tothe captain to have him ready the TONY (0.8.) JACKIE TED BEN JACKIE BEN JACKIE TED JACKIE -3- is enters Lisa Why does Beet to have al the fan? 1 wanna tel he captain everyone’ gma de Lisa runs off. | : — asi : ED idee! | rack pu ony — 1 i SPX: Temo : “They ee manent ron of blanc by he ror | \ ide up ter! rep Ever since the volcano, I'm afraid of heights! = TONY (0.8) Jacke y ‘Tony enters and acie hil around to grec i as Te tur his back and puts on & feat ba from the costume rack JACKIE (st proms) Hey hey! Tony reluctenlyecioes her fist puns. TONY : Hey hey, Listen, need you tobe on the lookout for this disaster guy who sack fon~ Who's tat? ' JACKIE Tony, Lean explain! Jackie urs to see Te is ow fcing thn and wearing the bd mask ode 1 is fe (Oh, who's tt? s | } | diet Buh-gawk. JACKIE He's. the backup singer I hired todo the bird song with me. TONY The bird song is soe. | JACKIE Tony, leant talk. Were on! ‘She pulls Ted with er out of he dressing rom. TED (rant whispering) We're on? Lan’ gon stage! JACKIE You have no choice! CASINO - GONTINUOUS TONY (0.8.) Welcome back to the stage Jackie Noelle... and this guy Jacki and terrified Ted step omto the cso ste. JACKIE Hey Hey! ENSEMBLE Hey Hey! TED (cota woe) 1 don’t know any songs! JACKIE Make something up! te = MOCKINGBIRD! NOW EVERYBODY HAVE YOU HEARD? Jackie ellos Tel TED (echoes) HAVE YOU HEARD? JACKIE HES GONNA BUY ME A MOCKINGBIRD, | a HI You! @ Line yac We Thar Disa TED HE'S GONNA BUY ME A MOCKINGBIRD. JACKIE TED AND IF THAT MOCKINGBIRD DON'TSING IF THAT MOCKINGBIRD DON'T SING HPS GONNA BUY ME A DIAMOND RING Daring the previous Ines, Jak lends Ted in a dance step which aecdentaly causes is ied mas to fllof. Tony recgnize hi and starts tard the stage. TONY You! JACKIE (an ide) Line Dance! “The cro excitedly dares, Tony and Tet are sept up in the commotion, eventually allows Ted t escape. JACKIE & FEMALE ENSEMBLE MALE ENSEMBLE [AND IF THAT DIAMOND RING IF-THAT DIAMOND RING WON'T WON'T SHINE SHIN, SOMETHING'S GONNA HP'S GONNA SURELY BREAK THIS BREAK THIS HEART OF MINE AND HEART OF MINE THATS A WHY, YES INDEED, AND THATS WHY I REEP ON ‘Of! YES, INDEED-O, YEAH, ‘TELLIN’ EVERYBODY SAVIN" YEAH... WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA, WHOA, WHOS, WHOA, WHOA, YEA! WHOA YEAH! . JACKIE ‘Thank you very much! Next show at midnight eT HALLWAY Shirley er, play arguing he d Masry MAURY ‘What if you get chilly again? SHIRLEY Ym not gonna get— MAURY Justin ase, we'llask that Chal for your wrap — SHIRLEY inet A despondent Marianne i siting on a bench nearby. MAURY ‘Yung lady, have you seen that nice walter withthe blond hair? MARIANNE, Chad? No, thankfully SHIRLEY (yentatite) (Ook, lover's quart? MARIANNE ‘What ae you talking about? SHIRLEY After 95 yeas of marriage [know how to recognize someone else who's in love, MARIANNE Ym not—1 Wait. you're married? SHIRLEY & MAURY Last time we locked! MARIANNE But... you seems happy. MAURY Weare happ MARIANNE, Ws just— from what I've seen, marriage is. ard MAURY ‘ll, you gotta work att make sure every day Shirley knows how much Tove het | SHIRLEY | Heleaves me ttle notes | MAURY | thie ‘em. Once, in her underwear drawer, Beneath her filly litle lacy things — | SHIRLEY J Maury enought And eas day il him, Maury Fave you rom now i teday Lo t MARIANNE Thats not logical because “forever” in a tangible time constraint— MAURY Who cares? Iknow she loves me! When Ian gota word in edgewise. SHIRLEY ‘When you don’t embarrass me MAURY You mean like this? (sings) WE'VE BEEN TOGETHER SINCE WAY BACK WHEN. SHIRLEY y the vfing! MAURY ‘SOMBTIMES I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN. SHIRLEY ‘You ain't the only one, mister MAURY BUTE WANT YOU TO KNOW, ASTER ALL THISE YEARS YOU'RE STILL THE ONE. {WANT WHISPERIN’ IN MY EARS YOU'RE _ MAURY / ENSEMBLE (0.5.) | ‘STILL THE ONE— | | MAURY | (to Marian a | \ ‘Together every day— SHIRLEY except the two yeas he was in the war. remember! (aings to Maury) You! | la 1 LOOKED AT YOUR FACE EVERY DAY an k MAURY " ‘This old mg? SHIRLEY [DUT ENEVER SAW ITTILYOU WENT AWAY MAURY ‘Anchors away! SHIRLEY WHEY WINTER CAME, JUS? WANTED TO GO MAURY (wanrep 10 Go) SHIRLEY [DEEP IN THE DESERT, LONGED FOR THE SNOW YOURE You! SHIRLEY / ENSEMBLE (0.5.) ‘STILL THE ONE~ SHIRLEY THAT MAKES ME LAUGH SHIRLEY / ENSEMBLE (0.5) STILL THE ONE— SHIRLEY ‘THAT'S MY BETTER HALE SHIRLEY / ENSEMBLE (0.5) (WE'RE STILL HAVING FUN, AND YOU'RESTILL THE ONE MAURY & SHIRLEY (CHANGING OUR LOVE 15 GOING GOLD EVEN THOUGH WE GROW OLD FT GROWS NEW MAURY SHIRLEY MAURY & SHIRLEY youre MAURY & SHIRLEY / ENSEMBLE (0.8.) STILL THEONE s SHIRLEY THAT LOVE TO TOUCH MAURY & SHIRLEY / ENSEMBLE (0.5.) STILL THEONE MAURY ANDI CAN'T GET ENOUGH MAURY & SHIRLEY / ENSEMBLE (0.S.) \WR'RE STILL HAVING FUN, AND YOU'RE STILL THEONE MAURY é& SHIRLEY YOU. ARS ] | MAURY & SHIRLEY / ENSEMBLE (0.5, : | omincey a MAURY & SHIRLEY / ENSEMBLE (0.5) " SILL THE ONE~ MAURY ANDI WOULDN'T SWITCH MAURY & SHIRLEY / ENSEMBLE (0.5.) \WE'RE STILL HAVING FUN, AND YOU'RE STILL THE ONE. (MAURY & SHIRLEY WERE STILL HAVING FUN, | \ ‘They bot tok moment to catch heir Beth SHIRLEY (Oh goa. MAURY & SHIRLEY AND YOU'RE STILL THE ONE ‘As the musie-inds dwn SHIRLEY Maury, [wil lore you from now MAURY ‘tl the day afer forever MAURY & SHIRLEY / ENSEMBLE (0.8.) coon SHIRLEY Now, back to oar first question —have you seen that boyfriend of yours? MARIANNE He's not— mean he zn... on assignmen Marian hasily exits ad Shirley cals to her SHIRLEY Lovebirdll Maury spins her arornd and grabs her from the back (romantically) (Ooh Maury! What's that My hernia Maury! Chase mel Chase melt He chases her of (SHIRLEY) MAURY SHIRLEY <3 CASINO Sister Mary is dscoered at the sot machine SISTER MARY No gambling! This quarter belongs to the orphans. ‘She starts to exit thn turns Back with purpose ‘And to you, st, lay (STRUGGLES) sgoood-buim, Guhm-boakn. Goo. goo ia meno 10.8 | GOODBYE. he lot machine arm ‘She speaks into the bal at the end of Helo. (aings) SISTER MARY (SISTER MARY) 1 KEEP THINKING THAT OUR PROBLEMS SOON ARE ALL GONNA WORK OUT BUT THERE'S THAT SAME UNHAPPY FEELING, THERE'S THAT ANGUISH, THERE'S THAT DOUBT. 1S THATSAME OLD DIZZV HANG UP. ‘CAN'T DO WITH YOU OR WITHOUT TELL ME WHY IS ITSO? DON'T WANNA LET YOU GO. ENSEMBLE (0.5) [NEVER CAN SAY GOODBYE BOY ENSEMBLE (0.8.) (000 YEAH, INEVIR CAN SAY NEVER CAN SAY GOODBYE coopaye, SISTER MARY SISTER MARY NO, NO, HOE NU, NU, NO! HELLO, HELLO, HELLO, HELLO! ENSEMBLE (0.8.) [AHL NEVER CAN SAY GOODBYE BOY ENSEMBLE (0.5.) (000 YEAH, I NEVER CAN SAY |INBVER CAN SAY GOODBYE, UH SAY. UH coopByE. SISTER MARY NO, NO, NOI NO, NO, NO! NO, NO, NO, NO! NO, NO, NO! NO, NO, NO! NO, NO,NO, NO! NO, NO, NO! NO, NO, NO! NO, NO, NO! She stops and looks tard heaven ‘TORN BETWEEN TWO LOVERS, FEFLINGLIKE A FOOL LOVIN! YOU BOTH IS BREAKIN’ ALL-— (SISTER MARY) the slot mace NEVER CAN SAY Takes out the qurter. coop Puts it in yew machine arm down ‘As she sings the ste, she pulls thes ENSEMBLE (0.8.) [NEVER CAN SAY GOODBYE! [NEVER CAN SAY GOODBYE BOY Lato [NEVER CAN SAY GOODBYE rime Hey Hs Stop Hejv JACKIE'S DRESSING ROOM “Tony enters, speaking in a walkie TONY ‘Ym checking her dressing oom, JACKIE Hey hey! Heexit. TONY ‘Stop with the “hey hey" Damnit! facet What the hell was tha? JACKIE He just showed up and tld me he was a performer. TONY Wel he’s not a performer! JACKIE know! TONY ‘Then why was he so dams good?! And where the hell is he? JACKIE 1 saw im run to thé fanquet room, TONY io wali ai) He's in the Banquet room JACKIE Fm sorry, Tony. TONY You're beautiful, I's notyour fault you'e easily Fooled. Heit, Seif the tp of a lawury hamper. JACKIE Do you need some ait? Ted emerges Thank you. JACKIE 1 don ike ying to Tony — % TED = But you have toin arder to save his fe JACKIE be There hasnt been a tremor in awhile. Maybe nothing wil happen. TED om In my line of work, Iexpest that everything wil always turn out fr the worst JACKIE _ Thank goodness you can reseue everyone | a Everyone? 1 consider the night a Success if 80% survive | yackn . ‘But there are hundreds of people on the boat! If only 80% survive that means..the other percent will dic N TED . ant foeus on that, a Yo JACKIE But don't you fel TED Feelings get in the way during a disaster. {earned that when. JACKIE 13 ‘When your wife passed away? : 1 Was Wo-ching eso a disaster expert? ‘TED Beck then we were just a couple of typical double PHD geologists. Wo-ching, Wo" wanted to have a working honeymoon. At Mount Wakakia JACKIE The volcano? But TED ‘We were hiking othe top when a 63 tremar hit, hiking tothe top hi i JACKIE (bt Were you terifed? Disasren = 59 - TED Yes, And that felingaflected muy judgement. I tried to grab Wo with my nont-dominant hand and she fll JACKIE Dida re-mairy? TED Negative, Thave my work now to keep me satistied JACKIE ‘Work! Thave to go sing) TED Alright. wait here fr the children to retum from the captain. JACKIE ‘Thank you, And... 'msony about your wife. TED No need tobe (BLANK-FACED) Ym happy. hoki exits aloud, ship) ink Marianne appre (in another prt of MARIANNE | don’t need him. I'm happy. (Chad appears Gn another part ofthe shi) cHaD | don't need her! I'm huppy. ‘They areal onstage, bu in dierent word MARIANNE But. Chad cHAD Marianne TED Wo. (sings) FEELINGS, NOTHING MORE THAN FEELINGS {TRYING TO FORGET MY FEELINGS OF LOVE MARIANNE TEARDROPS, ROLLING DOWN ON MY FACE. cHaD TRYING TO FORGET MY FEELINGS OF LOVE. ALL FEELINGS! < MARIANNE OR ALLMY LIFE 11 FEEL Tr cHAD 1 wisi NEVER MET YOU GIRL. TED ‘YOUTUL NEVER COME AGAIN, ALL FEBLINGS! TED ‘wor wo! Wo! ALL FEBLINGSIT TED CHAD / MARIANNE / TED FEEL YOU, AGAIN IN MY ARMS, Focus Ine! to prevent this disaster. Ted exits MARIANNE need to vet this aril. [MARIANNE exits, [nee to meet some new Indies! CHAD exits. CASINO - CONTINUOUS Sister is at the slot mo-hine SISTER MARY Baby nosis a new pale of shoes! She approaches a WEALTHY WOMAN whois smoking a cigarette Can Tbuma smoke? WEALTHY WOMAN uh sure, ‘The woman goes to geome from her purse, but Sister just grabs the it cigarette out of her hand, The woman exits, mf Sister approaches the devatar an its th SFX: Eleostor Doors Open Sister stp inside. * ELEVATOR - CONTINUOUS SHIRLEY (0.5.) Hold the levator! Sister frantically puss the “lose door” button but ~ Shirley runs om and enters the eleoator Sister... are you smokirg? SISTER MARY What? No! [found this onthe ground. Someone forgot to put tout, See? She pu on ito prove her point, the continues lang pu as she Bens al the way doa to put tout under her fo. SHIRLEY Are you okay? eae Disasren a SISTER MARY tam bathed in the love ofthe Lord. Now, what floor? 1am more than okay SHIRLEY “The main deck, Ijust need to get some fresh ai SEX: Elevaor Doors Close s the women stand in eokaoard silence. I “The songs plays ove he eleotor speakers Shirky has rouble breathing | SISTER MARY Is there something wrong, Sit? You Took very pale SHIRLEY No, Nothing’s wrong, Susdenly, Srey pushes the emergency stop button ‘SEX; EleotorSerech vm dying. SISTER MARY Oh, my poor child. Are you sure? SHIRLEY Ws terminal SISTER MARY What did the doctor say? SHIRLEY “That haves fow weeks lft SISTER MARY When die say thar? SHIRLEY Awe weeks go. SISTER MARY (0, not Hw do you eel? | SHIRLEY Junta few symptoms at. Bu t worl the end i've ad alo the fn warning sign SISTER MARY Like what? SHIRLEY Lers see ‘She pulls. ist out of er purse and reads =a rapid opening and shutting of one or more eyes, random pelvi spasms, inappropriate verbal outburss., and then, when they all happen together, 'm done. SISTER MARY Has your husband SHIRLEY No, Maury doesn’t know He must’t ever know. IWant whatever time we have left to only be happy. SISTER MARY Is there anything you car do? SHIRLEY ‘Wel there is one thing can co when the time comes so that Maury won't have to sce me incapacitated, bu SISTER MARY Shit stop! Sister his the stop button again andthe eleaator and music start up again. Knowingly taking your own life isa sn. An eternity in hell wll await you SHIRLEY know, Sister, But why should Maury be forced to sean suffer? SISTER MARY ‘There's no discussion. Don't even consider it SHIRLEY But Maury SEX: Eleotor Doors Oven HALLWAY - ENTRANCE OF “CORAL BLISS RESTAURANT” = CONTINUOUS The women step ou. i as Disaster k Ba SISTER MARY | 3 Why don’t you sep worrying about disappointing Maury and worry about i appointing omconee. i | SHIRLEY vat : sisTER MARY \ or) (out FATHER WHO ARE we I Ler ees nd erg yr Levora so | (Gark, bark) rue tat hae! I Ne slater end eet. on Tih wate eters nd Sst ran in ond ao ber i scorr be (Okay, wait, how's this go? baie (The w HER ( What's your sign? I don’t have cancer and you're not a vigin! Oh, Cte ay ought ond SHE wl on) _ Wait. That's not it. . (HE tras akan es go) : ‘mi hat Shiney apres the flowing ese wns fr ec ine wh Sst Si pa aly oe ut ing rey ede lying ry ter suintey the Looking for omeonet i (RAPID WINKING) scort (nconsfortaie) Uh, yeah SHIRLEY A girifriend? (RAPID WINKING) scort Will. she's not really my gilrend SHIRLEY So, you're available (RAPID WINKING) scort No. No, 'm not, Where's your husband?! SHIRLEY Oty hes fine, Me, however I'm foling very hot (RAPID WANKING) scorr 1s there something wrong with your eyes? . SHIRLEY Why? Are they? (COVERS EYES) Obvit’s nothing. You go on. scoTT Oray SHIRLEY (relieved, to erst) It topped. scorr sce you later SHIRLEY Tope sol Sie strt elie Urustinglowerds ho adhe backs ony. = 66 = Disaster! (SHIRLEY) (frustrated) ret Mis | Scot xt quay with Sie rang hi (Chad enters. Ben runs by, accidentally buomping ito him. Bac 1 cHaD 7 Wosht te | BEN Sonny, mister ‘ cHap ist Whats thera BEN Ye “have toll hecapan to get al he iboats ead! Ben ras of The Hap se Aw thas cate eause) ufos? Hey ki Lis ro Me usa No time! The earthquake’s almost here! = She nso of We cHaD arth? Ho SP Tremor The shaking shad of lnc and aes eter °C" lof esi fr the Ta ota ing "orl Bis Resteure. so that’ whathose are! ve go to war Sot and Marianne ‘ Ter He ras off CASINO Lzwora stands tthe lo nacine, The Wealthy Wife end her WEALTHY HUSBAND are waiting impatiently. WEALTHY WIFE Miss, are you done? LEVORA Back off, I ill have one quarter lft Garey Be quiet, Baby. Momany’s trying to win big WEALTHY WIFE (emotionally) Isthat a Pomer-Poodian? LEVORA Yes, Half pomeranian, haf poodle WEALTHY HUSBAND. ‘The breed is so rae! WEALTHY WIFE ‘She looks exactly ike my Mook! who just passed away. . LEVORA (Oh, wel, dust to dust WEALTHY WIFE ‘Ma‘am, is there any chance you would sell her tome? LEVORA What? Sell Baby? Absolutely WEALTHY WIFE We'd pay you double what they go for: Donald WEALTHY HUSBAND How's five? WEALTHY WIFE TEN thousand dollars! LEVORA (ohare Ten thousand dollars? ‘That used to be nothing to me; but now... But, my baby! {ould never lose you. Bat what if [Tose everything else? WEALTHY WIFE So, can we write you a check? LEVORA (getting am ident dather you dosomething else. f | Now, youdoit 1 Wey Yj vcs othe mah Thats. (Oh Baby, weneed some luck, Cross your paws, Ths quarter is our lst chance | Mi ings Bay tow War TO 108 108 : ome ‘She and wealiay woman knock onthe slot machine ox wooo ENSEMBLE LEVORA 000 BABY Bay LEVORA & ENSEMBLE (000-000-000.000-000-000 LEVORA ENSEMBLE " LEVORA KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK ON WOOD [AH KNOCK ENSEMBLE BABE, YOU BETTER KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK ON WOOD BABE, YOU BETTER KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK ON WOOD BABE, YOU BETTER KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK ON WOOD BABE, YOU BETTER KNOCK JACKIE'S DRESSING ROOM - CONTINUOUS Ted an Jacke are iting anxiously We're running out of time! Ben rns on BEN The captain has the febeas ready! TED Great jobt Wait! What's that noise? 7 JACKIE It sounds lke everyone's knocking on wood. TED 1s going to trigger the ethquaket JACKIE You have to stop them! TED Lets go! ‘Diy run out ofthe room. CASINO - CONTINUOUS LEVORA IS LIKE THUNDER UGHTNIN WEALTHY WOMAN (operatic) ‘THE WAY YOU LOVE ME IS— Levora cus her off LEVORA (commenting om her voice) Frightenin’ ings) YOU BETTER KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK on woop Levora * ENSEMBLE KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK ON WOOD KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK ON WOOD KNOCK ON WOOD YOU BETTER KNOCK KNOCK T'S LIKE THUNDER 00 I'S LIKE LIGHTNING HEY! KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK ON WOOD KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK ON WOOD LEVORA TH WAY YOU LOVE MES FRIGHT'NING LEVORA & ENSEMBLE KNOCK ON WOOD SHIP HALLWAY - CONTINUOUS j Ted, Jacke an Ben ru on TED We're almost there! He exits but Jacke stope suddenly nd turns back JACKIE Ben! When's your sister? I BEN “That baby went back to get her dolly! JACKIE Lisa! BEN (Gurming back) gether! JACKIE (casing ar him) Ben! ‘Tey runoff the opposite direction as Ted CASINO - CONTINUOUS ‘Tony enter and Marante approaches him. MARIANNE Mr: DelVecchio, this baeprint clearly shows a trap door! TONY We're never gonna sleep together, re we? MARIANNE Nol TONY ‘Then get the hell off my ship! “Tony gras Marianne but she sips ou of is grasp and rns, He chases after, but Leora’ dg bites his arm . LEVORA (as Baby) (Growl, Bark! Bark! Bark!) OW! Get it oft SHIP HALLWAY - CONTINUOUS Jackie runs on. Shirley and Maury appro er JACKIE Bent Lisat SHIRLEY Is something wrong? JACKIE [ean tfind ny chien! MAURY Wel help! JACKIE Follow me! ‘They all exit, Shiney was with pulsing pelos. SHIRLEY Great! cASINO - CONTINUOUS (Chad runs on and discovers Marianne cHAD Marianne! MARIANNE (carta ant THEN) (Oh Chad I'm hiding from Tony! cHAD You've got to get off this ship! MARIANNE What? Did Tony send yout cHaD Did you bear me? Leave! MARIANNE What ae you? His funy Ted rurs on TED verybody! Stop banging on the floor, An enormous disaster Tony ransom (grabbing Te) You! (Chad see Tony attacking Te Help! Marianne, go! He crosses euay fo save Te MARIANNE cant believe what you'veecome! She eis (to Tony) Get off him! Chad throws Tomy off Te, an leads Ted fo the center ofthe casino flor. ‘The patrons continue to dance, snd as Ted tries to get thir attention Levora Keeps singing and riffing ove im. TED am professor Ted—! LEVORA ENSEMBLE (eure) KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK ON WOOD TED i'm professor Ted BABE YOU BETTER LEVORA (Ree) KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK ON WOOD TED I’m professor Ted— BABE YOU BETTER, LEVORA cure) KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK ON WOOD Everybody STOPII! Everyone is quiet but Leoora ees rifng unaware. She fall notices and cams up amy | rep hl lp ort bt uy hp entre at noe ee ona i: (AWKWARDLY TIPTOES AND WHISPERS) ke 1 y heavy i oe ba crow | va a. i (eit ssp) Earrrethquacanke! The crowd gasps ana begins tiptoing of LEVORA ‘Baby, this is Sie puts a gurter in he slot machine and pulls the handle. And wins! SEX: Hawai Five-O Theme Song and Coins Dropping 1 id it) wont I wont ‘The ero ras back o Levora and the flashing machine TED ‘top the machine! Stop the cons! If’ too mach afte al hat knocking! LBVORA No way This the best dy of ry — SEX: Eartigae rep nthgual! I ‘The csin came en pepe ae ho bot ‘An electrical wie falls from the etn (TED) No, don’t toch the wire! “The Chef grabs it and is ecto cHAD Mariannet TED Jacke! LEVORA Baby! SISTER MARY esis hist END OF ACT ONE a — i act Two i CASINO Do PIU cn a Sto) | w ‘Te casino isin ruins, Wealthy Wife and Husband, Leora and a few tins are reasvering | nose and ie fl mate ii ok Be 1 scoTT \ | verima ee | : My arml dence Sot stands yp wth is back tothe Yep, everything’ tine. Scot furs around apply, reveling that he hasbeen impaled by the slot mackie amt ere tc nowstiting ont of hs stomach, He looks doo at it then collapses the | floor. CHAD (0.8.) Soot scort Chad? (Chad enters ad rans to Sot. cHAD Yep i's me buddy. I'm here. You're safe! scorT | Tart, Feat el my legs (Chaps Ht his fet cHAD Don't worry, Scot, we're gonna get you some help. Chad hepa staggering Sot ofa LEVORA What about aftershocks? WEALTHY WI Isitover” WEALTHY HUSBAND think so “They bth cautiously per up. (sings) [ALLRIGHTNOW, BABY I'S ALL RIGHT NOW. ‘Wealthy Wife stands ent sings happily ~ WEALTHY WIFE ALLRIGHT NOW, BABYS ALL RIGHT N— ‘A handel fats on erheul wn she collepos to Hh flor. Her hushand drags her fess body of ring Pystercally the entire me Silence. Then LEVORA/ VICTIM 1 (relieved) ALLRIGHTNOW, LEVORA Bapyir's LEVORA / ALL ALL RIGHT NOW, Tiny exit JACKIE'S DRESSING ROOM “Shivey, Mary, and Jackie are recovering. SHIRLEY ‘Are you okay. Maury?! Where does it hur?! ‘She touches his arm. MAURY \ usa | Mommy! ‘ yack Tee \ Lisa a : MAURY in 28. | yackte Lisa | Tres notin charge of hi! Ta pens i te org ete jackie ony eye | ky rts Hey, hey MAURY ‘Are we getting ofthe ship? TED ‘Wiccan’, We've broken away from the pir and we're heading towards the ocean! MAURY Wel isn the captain—? ‘TED He's dead. I need to get everybody — JACKIE ‘Ben is missing! MAURY Can you help find him? VICTIM (0.8.) ‘Wer trapped! TED “There's an entice ship tha: needs saving. t's too risky for me to focus on individual tives, MaUKY But VICTIM 2 (0.5.) Help ust TED Check the hallways! Tad rans off JACKIE ib have to find him! MAURY Wellcome with you JACKIE No= Ince quickly tates in Mary's tight and ae, Hen as politely as she ca, explains Fil be running, (THEN) [get him ane bring him back, and we'll et off this ship. Lisa Mommy! isa hands he he tooth . For luck MAURY \ Yeah, For luck Maury hands Jacke hs tot, nd she exits CASINO VICTIM ONE (0.5) My wife was burned alive VICTIM TWO (0.8.) hurts! Iehurts A severely injured BLINDED WOMAN stumbles on BLINDED WOMAN leant see! Somebody help me. Please! Tean't sect ‘Tony enters, The Bindal oman ie walking right founds him, Fe quietly dodges out fheroey athe very lat eeond and she staggers off aware. A relieved Tony is ‘approached by Jake JAKE Boss! We're sunk! We should have listened to that disaster guy! TONY (eximiy) Do you speak french, mon am JAKE Huh? TONY (excitaly) Force majeure". An act of God. 1 dia’ believe that idiot, but I couldn’ have hoped for anything better : ‘The Blinded Woman re-enters heed righ foward tem. Tony and Jae show no Indication that they seer. JAKE Why would you hope— TONY Insurance! I's gonna cover everything. Including my loans ‘Tony agin moves ake ad himself out of her wny, and continues as if nothing happened My worries are over! JAKE ‘ut... when the public finds out you were warned— TONY ‘Are people gonsa believe that quack? Or the man who br safety, Gather the survivors ushered everyone to | ee ste andthe Binet Wom enter | | opt! tm bro el : t uNDED WoMAN ; | tp " roxy oe a Tony exits Disastent = JACKIE'S DRESSING ROOM Mary, Shirley and Lis are there MAURY Don't worry, Lisa, Your Mom will find Ben. LISA. He's just hiding somevhere. Typical MAURY ‘Are you okay, Shit? SHIRLEY ‘Sure, you goddamn, crumb-crusted, tity ass crap baker. MAURY What? SHIRLEY Isa, “Sure, you goddamn crumb-erusted, tity ass—*... What did Ijust say?! MAURY Fm not sure Lisa She said, "Sure, you goddamn crum- going to the lifeboats! TONY Professor Scheider, let me finish cleaning up your mess TED My mess? I wamed you~ 0. wa we Disaster! =o - TONY (to erm) Keep moving! TED ‘Stop moving! TONY We are careening down the Hudson river! TED Actually, the socalled Hudson Rivers nota rver. Ifa “for cRrowp inpressed) oh. rep { ‘Which i n the process of eacting tothe earthquake and will soon produce an enormous seismic sicko, JACKIE Whats a “seismic seiche"? TED ‘That’ just scientific mumbo jumbo— Crowe i relieved, Then — | {or tidal wave ‘The cro serenns. Well be eae in the hallway! MARIANNE Chaat ‘Marianne exits towns the iboats asthe row slarts fo an out the other wry ~ TONY stop! | ‘The cro stops, and Tony runs in fron of them, then — Me first! Tony rns out and Mey al flow. ee Disasren! HALLWAY : ™ Maury, Shire Sse and Liss ih Ben" om hr shoulder) | Musi nto stot. | us | Usa 1 He needs his nslint | MAURY He ke te may! \| «SISTER MARY | Bat the hallway t \ Lisa, | Faster everyond heya og do he alloy Ging excite) HN, THETWO OF US NEED LOOK NO MORE. (Ne BOTH FOUND WHAT WE WERE LOOKING FOR Init A FRIEND TO CALL MY OW, TLLNEVER Ht ALONE, : [ND YOU MY FRIEND WILL SHE YOUVE.GOT A FRIEND IN ME MAURY ' | Careful Lis, there's hoes inthis floor Tey al wa cael tis usa | USED TOSAY... 1 AND ME t NOW ITS US... NOW ITS WE. NOWITS WE (carses unintllgibiy) Disasren! MAURY ‘The infirmary i on fc! Lisa hands “Ben” fo Maury ant rns into the infirmary Lise! Not! Maury iets “Be don and checks hs ple. Lise ns buck on, brandishing the syringe, but Maury stops her. (ooaty) He's gone, Deousated, Lisa eels doom to “Ben” and genily cals his body. Lisa [BEN. MOST PHOPLE WOULD TURN YOU AWAY. DONT LISTEN TO A WORD THEY SAY. THEY DON'T SEE YOU ASI DO. [WISH THEY NOULD TRY TO. YM SURE THEY'D THINK AGAIN, IF THEY HAD A FRIEND LIKE BEN. Een though it's hopeless, isa plunges the syringe of insulin into “Bex. Nothing (crushed) LUKE BEN, Wie Lisa i tured ey in gre “Ben” stirs and sits up puppet). MAURY Lisa, you saved himt Lisa, (sings jot) LUKE BEN! Lisa huge Ben OCEAN and SHIP DECK ves has ton the aero er PASSENGERS | PASSENGER 1 You' | Keep paling! : | ‘Marianne runs ant the ship deck and calls to Chad — | MARIANNE Stop! Stop tha isnt! Chad | cuap Marianne?! 1-1 hought you got off before the enthuse! You \ MARIANNE 1 | Yrmso sony! Ida’ know youvwer trying to help me | CHAD \ But MARIANNE « “There's no time, You have to get off the ifeboat, A tidal wave is coming! PASSENGER 1 (incredulous) Tidal wave? PASSENGER 2 | ‘She just wants usto go back and rescue he! PASSENGER 1 Wee No room! Get another boat | MARIANNE € Chad! Please! You tied to save me and I didntbolieve you! Now, you've got to wes believe met Chad int twtr | SFX Splash nine kort ee SEX: Swing Disasrent = 95 - PASSENGER 1 He's going beck PASSENGER 2 You'ee crazy! (Chad begins cling the bat ladder, but sips and alost ills. He regains his footing ‘ond races up to Mariayi ho tres to grab his hand but cHaD 1 can'treach=! MARIANNE You can do it! You have the rest of your life ahead of you! ‘They clasp hands an — (sings) BABY HOLD ON TO ME “THe FUTURE 1S OURS TO SEE MARIANNE / CHAD WHEN YOU HOLD ON TO ME... HOLD ON! Marianne has pulled Chad wp and onto the deck cHAD We di itt We're going tive MARIANNE (pointing of) ‘Werte going to die! The wavel Follow mel HALLWAY ‘Ted, Jacke, Leon, Tony, and some victims ae inthe alia. SEX: Wine Approwching TED By my calculations, we are about to be hit by an enormous tidal wave vicTIMs (oan of eat) TED followed in quick suecssion by ten more, victims (scream) : TED Bat, he floor-to-ceiling ratio in this hallway is small enough that we will not be injured if the boct capsizes. A ‘The lights fice. victims (gnep) JACKIE My babies! LEVORA Baby! WIFE ‘My husband! He's til in the casino! Sie starts to fea ou, bul Ted grabs her = TED Ws too late! TONY We're gonna dit The lights go ut, Ie darkness TED Here it comes! Ae Hel Wait ALL aut ‘SEX: Tidal Wave Crashing (OPTIONAL: During the tidal waves, the lights flicker on and off asthe bodies dummies) ofthe pele in the halony tumble about, Scene continues as written) TED Everybody hold ont ..We ate now completely upside ‘Aste says the fra word, the casino sign i now upside down ight come back on revealing that DOWN! ‘The victims, strewn about the stage, are recvering. WIFE ooking up screams! aut HUSBAND (0.5.) Help! Wire Andrew! . TED ‘Your husband! WIFE (pointing wprers) He survived. He's hanging fom the bat TED Hold on! Grab that tblecloth! (70 HUSBAND) Jump on thrce! Everybody but Ted grabs a tablecloth and begins taking smal shufing steps towards low the Husband WIFE (to Tony, sie moving) Wait om three or righ: after? _— ween on Disasren! TONY Idiot t's always “one, two, three jump! The Husbands bay drops fo the ground with terrible thud, andthe group freee in thar tac er itil he “After a buat, Tony sooty lends the ll othe ifs ody. Thy the tablet “The Wife cries and Tony approaches her— Its neveron tue, TED Jacke, look! “Te points as Maury, Shirley and Ben (now carrying “Lisa” dummy) approach BEN Mom! JACKIE My babies! TONY Found “emt BEN Lisa carried meal the way here. She's my hero! Bn places “List” am he flor JACKIE (tothe “Lisa” dommy) Lisal You did that for your brother? Siece. BEN She's too exhausted to speak Jacke plcks up “Lisa”. TONY [Alleght, people. 1's time Ted you al to safety, Now, there's an exit adr inthe Ice that— TED ‘Sip! Those itchen stoves have been leaking gassnce the quake, Any spark can cause an explosion! ® 1 Ye a the ‘ony starts to light a igaret TONY What's your point? Ted grabs the cigarette ou of is mouth. rl TED | Ws too dangerous! JACKIE (to Ted) Maybe not everything ts ot forthe worst, TED (reconsidering) Wen | JACKIE Tea? TED The kitchen fre dors should greatly reduce the rsk ofan explosion JACKIE Fire doors? TED (to Tony) ‘This ship has boen fitted with the rgulatory fre doors, hasnt it? TONY (rushed to ate) Inthe chef stil alive? JAKE Ne TONY (to ally Yep. ‘The kitchen meets ALL sfety requirements! TED “oo risky. Our best chece is to wait here to be rescued. MAURY |When clo you think someone will come? { Disaster! re Prt oti ay reak (cecks wercH) | TONY t You iio, 1338 ! (POINTS TORIS WATCH I Digit \ TED 3081 TONY aot! LEVORA ‘We gett Its imost 4AM. SFX: Dist Esposion victims at TONY iF we wat weal | rep ate go, we might die before we're recut! ‘TONY | “Anyone who wants olive, follow mel Lavo ad sme of he vit exit fords the ithe to sty | ‘The into starts pl SISTER MARY hid, are you going with them? SHIRLEY No. The docior sui to avoid al strenuous activi Ted tries to convince the rest ‘What ebout your? st " SISTER MARY Fmstaying here. Maybemy words can help someone. AMAN starts to exit but ‘Ted grabs his arm and pleads — TED WAITING TOR THE BREAK OF DAY The man pulls hs arm sway ond exits SISTER MARY Words that can help. Words that can help (sings) SEARCHING FOR SOMETHING TO SAY (ee grabs Ben) Death. Sin. Jesus Lights flicker, SHIRLEY FLASHING LIGHTS AGAINST THE SKY! TED stay calm, SHIRLEY mst MAURY {GIVING UP 1 CLOSE MY BYES! Ted congortingly sits with Ben on the flor. BEN & TED SITTING CROSS-LEGGED ON THE FLOOR MAURY What time is! ALL 250R STO. PX; Distant Explosion «Be rns to Jackie Dieasree! 102 Disasres! sr eee. TONY jak | Shears oe wih Toy. | rep fo) sate 5 | ‘She turns to Ted JACKIE Uhavetog. | Ben cries as they ext || TONY (0.8.) | No crying! 4 CREW AREA (Ca an Marianne exit closet MARIANNE Everything is upside down cHAD We need to find an eit Chad steps onto spcfc spot onstage, and oe her an edo of Cha’ oie ECHO (0.8) “Est et, cHAD Hey, iT stand right hore, there's an echo! He steps om te sp again ECHO (0.8.) “Beno, echo, echo MARIANNE Chadl You're Meeding! cHaD Never mind, Yn fine MARIANNE fibre fom the hem of her sr, exposing her shapely legs ‘Ase tite fbr around Chad's arm Chad... we dot get out of here— cHAD We're geting out of hve. And everything wil go back tothe way i was, MARIANNE Maybe I don’t want to. miss you, Chad cHap on? MARIANNE, Dodo you miss me? I know you said you're happier now — = 104 = Disasren! cHaD Happier? That you left me? Marianne (HE CAN'T BELIEVE HE HAS TO TELL HER) ite me | Cha eine ond pe iting on te pot — c 1-Fm ost! ECHO (0.8) Lost, lst, lst. ' Chad rans offand Marianne flows HALLWAY ‘A dlisheveled Levora enters minus her ao wig LEVORA Barthquake idl wave,..don’t matter, We're survivors! And [still got my money (Oh, Baby, ve set for if Levon i peting Baby, oho is raed inher purse as usual = Baby? yan sos tat ite actualy her afo wig. only her wig cap ight was Bab ‘She pulls ou soa she ‘She grabs er hand tom Baby! SEX: Huge Explosion sure and CASINO - CONTINUOUS Ted, Shirley and Maury ron TED No! The kitchen exploded! SHIRLEY The children! TED Jackie! Tony ener, covered in soon a bill of smoke. He coughs repented. Then ~ TONY Fm okay. TED Where's Jackie~7! SHIRLEY The children! TONY “There was this enormous explosion! Everything blew sky high, I... barely got out alive. But Fm back and mm ready to lad all of us~ TED But JACKIEL reomonernenae = 106 - Disasrent smmnuey rece tes ron a . | MAURY | da tt mane { ED c Wher ae? Tony : (ratty) \ Lost Lost them al inthe ire win rep Ch got How ky It doen't make any ser i Tony bei ote out of he am behind Ted (euing it nee) : “Their door shold have prevented wat minute, There wor no fie doors ror0N) You. you el | (si ; CREW AREA - CONTINUOUS ‘The action sack and forth bebe he ce ae and cs. MARIANNE i Cha plese! Ianto a! ‘CHAD - ‘Wy shoul ever balove you aga? MARIANNE hat do youmen=? cuap ‘You ssid you loved me! Disasrent = 107 - MARIANNE Hinow. cHaD You sad you wanted tospend your life with mo MARIANNE, Lal Chad naittngly steps om the pot again — cHAD You ted! ECHO (0. 5.) Lied ed, ied” CHAD (aings) IGAVE You Love ITHOUGHT THAT WE HAD MADE IT TO THE TOP IGAVE YOU ALL THAD TO GE WHY DIDIT HAVE TO CHAD/TED TED (sings to Tony) YOU'VE BLOWN ITALLSKY HIGH BY TELLING ME A UE WITHOUT A REASON WHY ‘YOU'VE LOWN IT ALLSKY HGH cHAD (to Marianne) ‘YOU, YOU'VE BLOWN IP ALLSKY HIGH (OUR LOVE HAD WINGS TO FLY |W COULD HAVE TOUCHED THE SKY TED / CHAD YOU'VE HLOWN Ir ALL SKY HIGH MAURY (to Tony) ‘You said the lifeboats would be sae! SHIRLEY ‘And the kitchen wouldn't explode! MARIANNE (Chad Tm sorry (Chad moves aay from her, stepping on the spo. cuap 1s too late ECHO (0. 5.) Late, Late Late” (Chad tars bk to confront her ad steps om th ‘pot again cHAD ECHO (0.8.) “ur, UP, UP: cHap ROUND I'VE FLOWN “Marian goes to touch Chad, 0 he moves axny stepping onthe spr aga THEN DOWN, ECHO (0.5) DOWN, DOWN, DOWN” cHaD OWN LIKE ASTONE MARIANNE IGAVE YOU LOVE TTHOUGHT THAT WE AD MADE IT TO THE TOP GAVE YOU ALL I HAD 70 GIVE cHAD wey Dip Ir HAVETO hy at B CHAD / TED / SHIRLEY / MAURY / SISTER / ENSEMBLE stor? YOU'VE BLOWN IT ALLSKY HIGH BY TELLING ME A LIE WITHOUT A REASON WHY YOU'VE BLOWN IP ALLSKY HIGH CHAD / TED / ENSEMBLE MEN WOMEN / MARIANNE YOU'VE BLOWN IT ALL SKY HIGH, WAY DID YOU LIEY/I DIDNT LIE BY TELLING ME A UI WITHOUT A REASON WHY WHY DID YOU LIEY/1 DIDNT LIE {YOU'VE BLOWN IT ALLSKY HIGHHI! CASINO - CONTINUOUS ‘The ero glaring & Tony. TONY | wont stan! here and take the blame for something no one could control, 1 get us allout of here. You's. ‘As Tony exits, he lightly pushes Sister Mary aside and she il imply to the ground. 5 SISTER MARY on Ta helps her up. TED Everybody wait here Ted burns inthe direction ofthe Kitchen explosion MAURY Where are you going?! TED I've gotto find Jackie and the kids! SHIRLEY TED I don't care - 10 - Disaster! MAURY ‘But you sad youcant focus on individual ives, TED 1 was wrong! I've got to try to save them! vicTIMs (@osiive renin) “Awww. TED Even f it means averyone else dies victims (confuse renction) Hake! ‘ Ted exits CREW AREA - CONTINUOUS cHAD Jus tel me why Marianne! MARIANNE cHaD You didn't lovee? MARIANNE Not cHAD wasnt good enough? MARIANNE chad! cHaD! you wanted to be with someone eae!?— MARIANNE 1 Twanted a careerand— cHap ‘You could have hada career AND me! You pat ch oft Disaster! <1 MARIANNE (collapsing internally Oh, Chad... 'ms0 07. You... you don’t understand what it was lke growing up in hat house. My parents... never spoke. Iwas afraid weld become cHaD Like them? MARIANNE. (Chad, Hloved you. Bull was scared we'd get marred and end up living ina house ‘of complete and utter— Maia ne unwitting stepson the spot — FEMALE ECHO (0.S.) Silence! Seca! Silene JAKE rans on JAKE ‘What ape you two doing?! This whole are is flooding! RUN They rn of BOWELS OF SHIP Jc, Be, ard Lin (unseen) are hanging from a burned-out and broken wal ae sre mide We ce thre ses of hands holding on, but only Jc ae el JACKIE Come on, Kids, We just have to hang on until Tony comes and rescue us BEN ‘Tony? JACKIE ‘Would you rater call him Daddy? BEN ‘Are you crazy? He ates meand Lisa JACKIE Bent BEN Face tt We're never going to have a father who loves us JACKIE (Oh, Ben, Cant we keep hoping? “Throughout he song, the actor playing “Ben” and “Lian” ducks down and pope pn fron ofthe corresponding hands BEN (sings) PRN CHEATED JACKIE BEEN MISTREATED LISA WHEN WILL BELOVED? 1°VE BEN PUSHED DOWN JACKIE [PVE BEEN PUSHED ‘ROUND BEN WHEN WILLT BE LOVED? n pops back dou leaving Jacke alone il JACKIE WHEN TFIND A NEW MAN { THAT WANT FOR MINE 1 ALWAYS BREAKS MY HEART INTWO IT HAPPEN EVERY TIME l Lisa pops up and he high noe shocks Jacki, emusing her to lose her grip and disappear from vi | LISA wet Jacke soy lis ack up uring the following — \VE BEEN MADE BLUE i I'VEBEEN LED TO JACKIE \ (WHEN WILL BE LOVED? BEN JACKIE TELL ME), H JACKIE / LISA THEN BEN WHEN WIL.1BE LOVED? ; TED (0. 8.) é Jackel JACKIE Tony! Tod enters, eluching the wall for support, He's standing onthe edge of beam woh separates hin from Jacke and the Kids “Ted? You ran into this hllhole to save us? TED had to JACKIE hy Ted, But. there's ne way to get tous. TED ve got to cross this beam, JACKIE Noe! W's above a gas tank, That's on fire. And surrounded by snakes. And it's 2 fifty foot drop, And.. yu told me you've boen afraid of heights ever since. TeD Jackie, there's something bigger than me being afraid of heights JACKIE Ob, Tea BEN (exited) ‘Come on, Professor Scheider! You can do it ‘ed lets go the wal, then soy fs hs og fo step out ont the Beam — ‘ JACKIE (shrieks) ie careful Startled, he grabs the wll again for support. Then . TED tan do it earned how to balance in Romania when the Comenichi Dass collapeed .| “Ted roses tard Jie nd he ids, lance br ot 2 BEN q atch out or that hole! . He doe fect Oly JACKIE + | Your shoe's an fre! He sings his eg in scisor leap to put i ou, ‘You you dropped something t He turns around and bend vert pice twp ahie iing his eg in apache jumps off the ear rbesque, He te BEN Look out behind you! He throws his arms and locks bein hi ala the end ofa routine Just kidding ks his pose and pt Jackie and Bento safely Ive got you. This way ‘They begin torn off BEN Lisat TED ri get her ‘Ted runs back and picks up a pir ofthe ake hand okay! They ll exit, HALLWAY SEX: Door Crenks Open | “Tony pushesa hey door open and enters w cro allay | TONY | sme again. Cry baby He ses a dav and cose i. ‘rash room... ust be an ent in ere, He opens te doo, and many rat op out SFX: Rats Squal | AHI So many ats! Hestams the door shut and they're gone (SEES ANOTHER DOOR) “This room cosld bea way out opens dar an fir ae | Aut Pe! 1} He : ‘My moustache! Thats at leas a second degree He bends om and splashes tater on it suing! (REALIZES) i Sea water! Thre musta lek his way, Tbs — He goes fost he a,b SFX: Door lana Shut. | Damnit Lk int (SPARTSTO CRY) Don't do it“ony. Bea man. ‘What the hell do I pay an exterminator for? Oh, right I never paid him. fool outta Disaster!

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