TOP 7 signs of Bad Parenting | Being One of Bad Parents
Parenting is not as simple as it sounds. It is not an hours or a days job. It is not
a routine task with a well defined structure and a process. It does not even come
with a handbook to guide you to be a good parent. In fact this process of raising
children with certain standard values and morals with which they live lifelong is
one of the most complicated jobs of all.
It is said that a child is a mirror of his or her parents. Parents being the first
teachers of their childrens lives have a major role in bringing them up. The way
their parents speak or behave has huge impact on their children and their
behaviour. So it indirectly becomes the parents responsibility to teach and
inculcate good habits in their children. Sometimes ignorance of some parents or
their busy schedule takes them away from their children. This paves the way for
Bad Parenting.
Bad Parenting might not be a voluntary or an intentional act. You might not even
know when you have become one among them. But being a bad parent has a
very bad impact on the child. You might wonder- what does Bad Parenting lead
to? It results in an unhappy and emotionally disturbed child. It may also
transform an innocent child into a wild one.
Here are few of the signs of Bad Parenting 1. If you ignore your child
When your child is an infant and you close doors or use earplugs to ignore
his cry. If you get irritated by your babys cry and you decided to stay
away. Your child might be screaming at you and might cry for your
attention but this does not divert your focus from a TV screen or a laptop.
You do not care to pick your child in your arms and cuddle your child and
love him. And this is just the beginning.
These are the early signs of bad parenting. You are on your way to become
a bad parent in future. It may happen in future that the most common
word you use to deal with your child is Ummm.
Your daughter might win a fancy dress competition or a national level
beauty contest or your son might get a trophy you may not give a
favourable reaction but you do not seem to be interested. You do not smile
or make an eye contact.
Neglecting the child can have adverse effects on their physical and mental
development. It can inculcate disobedience in the child. As a parent it is
ones responsibility to listen to the child, to know their feeling and to fulfil
their basic needs.
2. If you constantly criticize your child
Whenever you see your child you start finding faults in your child. You
constantly criticize them. You never look satisfied by their work and their
behaviour. There might me days when you constantly criticize your child
from the time your child opens his eyes in the morning until the child
leaves for school and this again continues after he returns.
You develop problems with everything related to them their way of
talking, their way of walking, and even their breath. You may find
everything imperfect in your child and you start focusing on those.
Criticizing your child will move you forward in your journey of bad
parenting.
Criticizing child can make them a less confident and a timid person in
future. They can start to believe that they are the most imperfect people
across the world. This can gradually hamper their mental state.
3. If you avoid discussions and try to command your child
Your child may come up to you and try to discuss issues with you or try to
have a decent conversation with you but you try to command your child
and dictate him. You are not interested in listening to them. You never
behave moderately with your children.
Whenever you interact with them you overreact. You start to scream and
shout and rave. You remove the word sorry, thank you and please
from your dictionary. You are always disrespectful while dealing with your
children. You try to cut off your child whenever he tries to explain you
something. You never want to engage your child for any discussion or
normal enquiry about his day to day life. What you do is talking rudely to
him and limiting the ways for him to approach you.
Avoiding discussions and dictating the child can bring reluctance in
children to approach and share their feelings. This can escalate your
childs level of nervousness. Your child may soon start to ignore any
confrontations to avoid your bad behaviour. It can make them a reserved
person or a loner.
4. If you vent your anger on your child
For being a bad parent criticizing is like a starter. Main dish is served when
you start bursting venomous anger on your child. And this anger
exaggerates your criticism. These bursts of anger may also in future lead
to a level of violence.
You may not even realize when you start hitting your child without
concrete reasons. Your every criticism may be accompanied by a burst of
anger and physical abuse. Even emotional abuse can be far worse than
physical in some ways. Emotional abuse lasts a lifetime because it lingers
in a persons mind forever.
The powerful combination of criticism, anger and violence accelerates you
to the path of bad parenting. Exposing the child to physical violence or
verbal abuse can be very damaging to a childs psychology. Physical and
mental abuse can result in children losing their confidence. It can also
develop inferiority complex in them. Every vocal abuse also affects childs
psychology.
5. If you do not trust your child
You are one of the bad parents if you never believe in your child. You may
never accept what your children are saying. You always try to cross
examine him or her. Many parents do not have trust their children. Even if
the child gives the explanation for their actions, parents do not show
interest in listening to them.
They believe others instead of their own children. They have no faith in
their children and de-motivate them with their words or actions. It is not
uncommon for other to complaint about a child. If you believe in others
complaints more than your kid, you are passing the signal that your child
is a brute and liar.
If you turn deaf ears to your childs explanations and pleas, your child
develops insecurity and may turn a rebel. This will result in hiding things
from you and they will eventually even stop explaining themselves. Lack
of trust makes the child against their parents. The child may in future lose
the respect he has for his parents. This sort of behaviour can cause a child
to be a rebel or do things which they are not supposed to do.
6. If you pamper your child
All parents love their children. The way they express their love differs. If
the parents are not expressing their love, it doesnt mean that they do not
care for their children. Showing too much of concern and love to their
children is a sign of bad parenting. Too much of concern and affection can
bring trouble in the attitude and behaviour of the child. It may lead to non
disciplinary activities by the child. The children may become stubborn,
undisciplined, irresponsible, arrogant and irritating.
Buying everything your kid lays his finger on is again a sign of bad
parenting. Such kids fail to understand the value of money. Pampering or
worrying about children also can spoil the child by making them too
demanding. They will demand anything from you anytime expecting you
to present it to them, whatever your circumstances may be. Even after
they grow up, such kids end up hopelessly on financial fronts and are
unable to level responsibilities.
Sometimes, this need may provoke them to steal, lie or become rude.
Many parents protect their children and interfere in their activities in such
a manner that when they grow up they become overly dependent on
others or grow up as cowards.
7. If you do partiality
Parent who has more than one child should never show any kind of
partiality between them. Favouritism or partiality can be very damaging to
a child. In many households, boys get preferential treatment, making the
girl child feel useless or neglected. Be it with education, food or essential
requirements, girls are often known to suffer, beginning in their own
homes. It is easy to spot a child being favoured over others.
If you corner one kid of the lot, punish or scold him more than others then
the child will definitely be hurt. This will give rise to the feelings of
resentment and injustice for you. This will later appear in the form of
badmouthing by one of your kids as they grow up. They will simply lose
their trust in you.
In short, there are several signs and effects of bad parenting. Many kids lose selfesteem, develop bad habits or feel inhibited for the rest of their lives. Parenting
is a continuous job and children rely on parents for the same. So make it a point
to take time out for children, teach them good manners and correct them when
they do wrong.
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