Three Oclock One English Morning

It is three oclock one morning of an English Winter, and outside it is dark, and
somewhat cold, with cloud to cover the stars of night and a slight breeze to
rustle the fallen leaves that, somewhat dried by recent daytime snow-melting
Sun, have been wind-gathered to rest where two parts of one garden fence meet
and are met.
Inside, the soft candlelight that pleases as I sit, typing this, at my desk on which
the decanter of fine vintage Port rests, still half-full, and music by Mozart gently
suffuses the room, brought forth from grooves in vinyl by a modern marvel of
sound reproduction. There is, alas, here in this modern dwelling no fire of logs to
warm, as in that farmhouse, abode for many happy years until quite recently
Instead, only the warmth of such rememberings as often keep this old man
happy in these, the twilight years of his, of my, life.
Much to recall; and much to remain silent about, untransmitted by words such
as this to be brought forth, and some of which have been brought forth, only
aurally to trusted friends of long-standing who may or who may not, according
to their own judgement, recount such matters for and to others, by whatever
means, but only after I myself am dead. Thus, there are some things I will not
comment about, here, by written means such as this.
So, to try and answer at least some of your questions, although trying to abridge
four decades of experiences into one concise reply will of necessity mean some
terse and perhaps unsatisfactory explanations.
In Respect of Adolf Hitler
As I wrote some years ago while living that Way of Life known as Al-Islam:
I have never, in my heart and mind, renounced my belief in Adolf Hitler as a
good man, an honourable man, who believing in God strove to create a just
and noble society, and who was destroyed by the ignoble machinations of those
opposed to what is good and who have spread dishonourable lies about him, his
followers and his Cause. Thus it is that I find I cannot denounce this noble man
and those who fought and died for the cause he upheld, as I cannot and will not
denounce those who today honourably (and I stress honourably) continue the
struggle in his name and who respect the Way of Life which is Al-Islam Thus it
is that I continued for several years with Reichsfolk an honourable
organization striving to presence something of the Numen I believe was manifest
in National-Socialist Germany and in and through the life of Adolf Hitler.

Furthermore, the National-Socialism of Reichsfolk was the ethical, non-racist,

National-Socialism I had developed in the late nineteen nineties; a Way of Life
which saught to respect the difference and diversity of Nature, and which saught
the development of separate, free, ethnic nations, with their own culture and
identity, with these nations co-operating together, with no one race believing
they were somehow superior to, or better than, any other race, but with each
striving to achieve their differing Destinies, with there being no hatred of other
races but instead a respect, deriving from honour.
This non-racist National-Socialism was developed for two main reasons. First,
because I considered that the notion of racial superiority was untenable because
it was fundamentally dishonourable; that is, unethical. Second, because I
realized that the old type of National-Socialism led to unethical conflict, and that
modern warfare was itself unethical.
In Respect of National-Socialism
For some thirty years, from the late nineteen sixties to the late nineteen nineties
(CE), I actively strove by various means, political and otherwise, to propagate
National-Socialism with the overt aim of creating, in my own homeland, another
NS State, on lines similar to that of NS Germany. Indeed, one might with truth
say that this singular aim was the main, the most important, aim of my life.
For the first ten or so of those years I naively and idealistically believed that this
goal was attainable by conventional political means, given good leadership and a
correct explanation of what I then understood National-Socialism to be a noble
cause, based on the values of honour, of loyalty to comrades, and duty to ones
folk. I never saw or even imagined myself as some leader; instead, and knowing
the importance of leadership, I saught to find someone to whom I could pledge
my loyalty and who, unlike me, possessed the charisma, the virtues, of a
genuine revolutionary NS leader. Indeed, it was something of a friendly jest
among certain members of Column 88 that I was a Himmler in search of his
Adolf Hitler.
Never finding such a leader but always, during those decades, hoping that
such a person would emerge I floundered about, doing the best I could to
propagate NS politically; and also trying keep the spirit, the ethos, of NS alive,
as Colin Jordan had done and did do, until his death, although in a much better
way than I ever did. For I was often reckless and impatient, and perhaps too
fanatical at times. Not to mention occasionally arrogant, disdainful as I was on
such occasions of advice from people such as CJ who, for instance, considered
that my plan for recruiting and using ruffians (as with the short-lived NDFM) was
not only foolhardy but not really in keeping with the ethos of NS.
After those first ten years, while much personal experience was gained, little if
anything political had been achieved, and not only not by me. No one else, no
other NS (or even nationalist) organization, had achieved anything significant
either, despite much commitment and effort by hundreds of supporters. Indeed,
what I termed The Magian System seemed to be stronger, more tyrannical.

Thus, for most of the next two decades I occupied myself with other tactics,
other than overt political ones. Trying to use covert means, and seeking to
explain, codify, refine, and possibly evolve National-Socialism itself. However,
toward the end of these two decades I did briefly return to active, overt, politics
forming and leading the NSM, but more to try and continue the work begun by
a loyal and dedicated comrade than because I had changed my view of myself as
a leader. For I hoped, even then, that this new organization might attract
someone of the right calibre to lead it. But neither these covert tactics, nor this
new political organization, worked, leading me, over of period of many years, to
certain conclusions, and among which conclusions are and were the following.

1) The first conclusion was that NS or something based upon or evolved from
it could only ever become a significant political force if there arose a leader of
sufficient nobility to lead a new movement. For such a leader would be the
movement just as Adolf Hitler was both the NSDAP and NS Germany. That is,
political programmes, slogans, propaganda, activities, ideology, meetings,
marches, were all fundamentally irrelevant if there was no such leader to
inspire, to lead, to give ones loyalty to, and who embodied the essence of the
NS ethos, just as Adolf Hitler embodied the essence of German NationalSocialism. Without such a unifying, charismatic, figure, all movements,
organizations, groups, whatever the initial idealism and enthusiasm of their
members, descended, sooner or later into squabbling factions, just as
dishonourable behaviour and lack of loyalty became rife. Even some limited
electoral success, as the BNP and other European nationalist movements have
shown, does not prevent this process, so that such organizations soon devolve
to be at best minor political parties, perhaps with some political representation,
but without any realistic hope of being elected to power, despite their constant
rhetoric to the contrary. Thus they become a minor irritant to The System, but
no real threat to it.

2) The second, perhaps more disturbing, conclusion was that we ourselves are a
significant part of the problem. That it is not just a question of simply changing
the political system, but of changing ourselves, as individuals, in a fundamental
way.

Thus, and for example, perhaps a majority of those of European ethnic descent
were no longer Aryan in nature. Instead, they de-evolved to become what I
termed Homo Hubris, and it was this new sub-species of the genus Homo which
has become the often willing and the easily manipulated hordes who had sided
with the Magian and so defeated NS Germany. Not only that, but it was these
new White hordes who kept the whole Magian System going, by their obedience
to its ethos, and by their love of, and even now need for, the abstractions and
materialism of The System.

In a personal way through a practical striving for covert action over many
years I discovered just how difficult it is to find people (freedom fighters)
ready and willing to do practical deeds and possibly sacrifice themselves for the
Cause. Partly because this Cause supposedly our shared Cause did not live
in them: they merely agreed (instinctively or consciously) with some aspects of
its outward tenets. That is, it was more akin to some fleeting, easily discarded
interest, or some passion which they could and often would forget when some
other passion came along to enchant or ensnare them. For our Cause was not
for them a Way of Life, a numinous and living faith, but rather just one type of
politics among many.
Furthermore, while perhaps a few individuals might be inspired to action or a
few other individuals might do some deeds, elsewhere such few actions, such
few deeds, did not and never would affect The System in any significant way,
and certainly would not break it, simply because a majority still supported it,
actively or passively, and certainly did not support us, our Cause.
One therefore discovered for ones self the truth of the truism that practical
resistance to tyranny to an occupying power only works if one has support,
significant support and sympathizers, from ones own people, from those so
occupied because they resent such occupation and its tyranny. The hard reality
was that a majority of our people did not even feel they were living under some
alien tyranny, and that a significant percentage even embraced the ideas and
the ways of the occupiers and their collaborators (the hubriati) so much so for so
many decades that The System had ceased to be something which they (some
alien interlopers) imposed upon us but instead had become a hybrid system,
partly theirs but also now ours, although always under the influence and
ultimate control of them and of those who benefited from such a system, such
as the hubriati. In a simplistic sense, we our folk, or a majority of them
had been changed, from within; or been bred and educated by The State to
accept and endorse, or at least be fairly passive parts of, The System.
One therefore began to consider working to undermine The System not from
within, but from without by aiding those freedom fighters who for various
reasons also wanted the demise of the Magian and their own oppressive
systems, and who thus not only desired to live in their own lands in their own
way, but who also had a Cause that many were ready to die for.
Then, after about a decade or so of such experience it became obvious that even
this approach was also not working, and would most probably also not ultimately
succeed. (a) It was not working partly for similar reasons it has not worked for
us (although our efforts were on a far smaller scale, over less periods of time)
that is, because these external allies were also a minority among their own
kind, with many many others of their kind actively supporting and even
collaborating with the enemy, and even desiring to manufacture a type of
Magian system in their own lands. Thus, they were as lost to their kind, as a
majority of our people were lost to their own innate ethos and the potential
latent within us. (b) It would probably not ultimately succeed because to do so it
needed internal dissent in the heartlands of the West, which was not
forthcoming. Indeed, while some dissent existed, it was an annoyance to The
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System rather than a threat, with perhaps a majority believing the propaganda
levelled at those freedom fighters, and actively or passively supporting the
policies of their governments aimed at disrupting and destroying those freedom
fighters in other lands.

3) The third conclusion was that each and every European homeland was no
longer European by ethnicity, given the large-scale and continuing immigration
of many decades, and that short of implausible practical civil wars and a
significant change in exterior lands there was no practical way to make them
wholly European again, and thus build a new folkish State. Implausible, because
as mentioned above, a majority of even each and every European folk would find
such a practical, civil war, solution unacceptable now and in the foreseeable
future; and because one small homeland alone could not take such steps to
expel whole communities while Magian power and the Magian ethos held sway in
other lands, for the lone small homeland would soon find itself subject to
punitive sanctions and, ultimately, invasion and thence regime-change.

4) The fourth conclusion was that, in essence, The State itself as concept, as
idea, as ideal was ultimately incompatible with the numinous essence behind
what Adolf Hitler had intuitively presenced, manifested, as National-Socialism in
Germany. That is, that The State could no longer be made numinous, or
manifest the numen, as it had begun to do in NS Germany, and that NS
Germany was only an intimation, a beginning, a pointer toward a deeper truth; a
truth revealed in part by the defeat of NS Germany by the White Hordes incited
and led-on by the Magian.

This is the truth of our natural and necessary tribal nature, and of the nature of
honour itself. The truth of Numinous Law (the law of personal honour) and the
truth of how the clan, with a living, numinous, tradition, is and always will be
immune to the Magian, and the dishonourable, un-numinous, abstractions that
the Magian and their hubriati have manufactured, and which abstractions stifle
our potential, disconnect us from the numen, and profane and undermine Nature
and thus the living folk communities which are and which have been natural
manifestations of Nature.

5) My fifth, last, later, and possibly most significant if contentious, conclusion

was that the very notion the idea of there existing, or of desiring to move
toward the ideal of, some pure race was an abstraction, and as such was unnuminous and thus unethical; contrary to honour itself, and which honour I had
concluded was a practical expression of the essence of personal empathy. That
is, that both race itself and the concept of an ethnic folk were just like the
concepts of the nation and The State causal, immoral, abstractions; and that
what was needed were new clans, new tribes, not based on any abstractions,
any ideology.
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In Respect of the Future

Given these conclusions arising from four decades of practical experience and
from much reflexion it is my view that the future lies in numinously pursuing
two things. First, the numinous goal of new clans and tribes, and which new
clans and tribes could be either (1) evolutionary manifestations of (derived from)
the natural already existing folks found in and evolved by Nature (and which
thus possess ancestral living traditions), or (2) honourably and thus ethically,
entirely new folks (not based upon any particular ethnicity nor upon any belief in
such ethnicity) and which new folks we ourselves found and establish by
dwelling in a certain local area, and which begin as our own extended family, or
that of ours and also of a few trusted friends who feel as we do. Second, in
changing ourselves as individuals, within, by a striving to live in balance, in rural
harmony, with Nature and by a striving to uphold the most important because
numinous principle of personal honour.
There is thus, in either of these two possible ways, no involvement with practical
politics, nor any desire to seek revolutionary change, by whatever means or
tactics. In truth, there is no ideology, and no politics at all only a living of life
in a certain way. A rejection of The System by withdrawing from it, and letting it
decay and fall as it is destined to decay and fall, as all such causal un-numinous
systems decay and fall, given time.
The former that is, (1) above, the first possible way is, for example, the old
way of Reichsfolk, and of kindred groups; and the latter (2) above, the second
possible way is the ethical, human, way proposed by my own Philosophy of
The Numen where what matters is a personal compassion, personal empathy,
and personal honour. And it is the latter the compassionate way of The
Philosophy of The Numen that represents my views, now; views, perspectives,
obtained by the pathei-mathos of my past forty years. My experiences, my
reflexion upon those experiences, have therefore changed me, as a person, and
taken me far beyond, far away from, National-Socialism and even from what I
termed, over a decade ago, the ethical NS of Reichsfolk.
In The Philosophy of The Numen, there is a return to a more human personal
scale of things; to slowly growing, through the generations, the foundations for
new communities. An evolution toward a new type of human being, a new
human species, and a new type of culture. For these, we do not need some
revolution, some ephemeral State, some ephemeral political type of power;
some ephemeral military force. Instead, we only need to presence, to manifest,
within us the numinous itself, beyond ever changing causal abstractions.
There is thus the perspective of decades, of centuries born as this perspective
of ours is from the wisdom of our experience; from a concentration on the
important and the numinous as against the unimportant and the profane.

In Conclusion
Now, the decanter only a quarter full, and Dawn not long in duration away, it is
time for a full English breakfast to ready me for the tasks of another daylight
day, again.
But before then, perhaps I should, and in conclusion, quote some words of mine,
recently written, which at least for me seem to capture the essence of my life
and the understanding I believe I have garnished from such strange livings as
have been mine:
What, therefore, shall I personally miss the most as my own mortal life now
moves toward its fated ending? It is the rural England that I love, where I feel
most at home, where I know I belong, and where I have lived and worked for
many many years of my adult life the rural England of small villages, hamlets,
and farms, far from cities and main roads, that still (but only just) exists today
in parts of Shropshire, Herefordshire, Yorkshire, Somerset and elsewhere. The
rural England of small fields, hedgerows, trees of Oak, where over centuries
a certain natural balance has been achieved such that Nature still lives and
thrives there where human beings can still feel, know, the natural rhythm of life
through the seasons, and where they are connected to the land, the landscape,
because they have dwelt, lived, worked there year after year, season after
season, and thus know in a personal, direct, way every field, every hedge, every
tree, every pond, every stream, around them within a day of walking.
This is the rural England where change is slow, and often or mostly undesired
and where a certain old, more traditional, attitude to life and living still exists,
and which attitude is one of preferring the direct slow experience of what is
around, what is natural, what is of Nature, to the artificial modern world of cities
and towns and fast transportation and vapid so-called entertainment of others.
That is what I shall miss the most, what I love and have treasured beyond
women loved, progeny sown, true friends known:
The joy of slowly walking in fields tended with care through the hard work of
hands; the joy of hearing again the first Cuckoo of Spring; of seeing the
Swallows return to nest, there where they have nested for so many years. The
joy of sitting in some idle moment in warm Sun of an late English Spring or
Summer to watch the life on, around, within, a pond, hearing thus the songful,
calling birds in hedge, bush, tree, the sounds of flies and bees as they dart and
fly around.
The joy of walking through meadow fields in late Spring when wild flowers in
their profusion mingle with the variety of grasses that time over many decades
have sown, changed, grown. The joy of hearing the Skylark rising and singing
again as the cold often bleak darkness of Winter has given way at last to Spring.
The simple delight of having toiled hours on foot through deep snow and a
colding wind of sitting before a warm fire of wood in that place called home
where ones love has waited to greet one with a kiss.

The joy of seeing the first wild Primrose emerge in early Spring, and waiting,
watching, for the Hawthorn buds to burst and bloom. The soft smell of scented
blossoms from that old Cherry tree. The sound of hearing the bells of the local
village Church, calling the believers to their Sunday duty. The simple pleasure of
sitting after a week of work with a loved one in the warm Summer quietness of
the garden of an English Inn, feeling rather sleepy having just imbued a pint or
two of ale as liquid lunch.
The smell of fresh rain on newly ploughed earth, bringing life to seeds, crops,
newly sown. The mist of an early Autumn morning rising slowly over field and
hedge while Sun begins to warm the still chilly air. The very feel of the fine tilth
one has made by rotaring the ground ready for planting in the Spring, knowing
that soon will come the warmth of Sun, the life of rain, to give profuse living to
what shall be grown and knowing, feeling, that such growth, such fecundity, is
but a gift, to be treasured not profaned
These are the joys, some of the very simple, the very English, things I treasure;
that I have loved the most, and whose memories I shall seek to keep flowing
within me as my own life slowly ebbs away

David Myatt

(Extracts from a letter to a friendly enquirer)