The Practical Guide to Coordinating Your Wedding

by Henry and Chris Baker

INTRODUCTION

This book has been written for people to help our clients in the planning for
their wedding day. This book can also be of use to the professionals that you
may hire.

I discuss a time line and a standard approach to scheduling and managing the
activities of the wedding party. I also discuss many of the practical issues that
will affect the Bride and Groom on their wedding day.

This book is also designed as a practical guide to DJ’s, musicians and banquet
coordinators. Our clients might enlist the help of friends in the videotaping of
their wedding. Or they might hire a friend with limited experience to provide
music for their day.

Having DJ’d for many years, I found it frustrating to be at a wedding as a

photographer working with a DJ who was a friend of the couple but very
inexperienced. This book was originally written as a training manual for DJ’s
and has been modified to serve as a practical guide for planning the acitivities
of the day for both our couple and the people they might hire.

Most wedding books talk to the minutia of the day. Schedules tend to be micro
managed and many of the tips and details covered miss the practical aspects of
what will be happening. This book talks to the practical details of the day. Most
of the details of the first few chapters are focused on the rolls of the individuals,
the ceremony and points of etiquette. The remaining chapters are written to
help our wedding professionals and are written to help our DJ or MC.

Who needs this and book?

This book is a resource to help anyone planning a wedding reception party or

working in the role of a wedding coordinator. This book was designed as a
supplement to a training video “The DJ’s Guide to Running Weddings”.

Where my expertise comes from:

The development of this book was the direct result of years of experience as a
wedding DJ, wedding videographer and wedding photographer. The book was
originally written by me, but is currently updated and maintained by my son,
Chris Baker ([Link]).

Chris is one of the better DJ’s servicing eastern Massachusetts. He has worked
in most of the night clubs in downtown Boston as well as for a number of Radio
Stations. He had been DJ’ing weddings for over fifteen years.
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 Copyright, Henry Baker, 2004 at, [Link] and [Link]
 The Practical Guide to Coordinating Your Wedding
by Henry and Chris Baker
My interests (Henry Baker) are in wedding photography and I currently operate
a professional portrait photography studio located in Walpole.

I have also personally photographed over a 100 weddings over the last ten
years.

In the mid 90’s, I brought all of my experience together to write this book and
produce a professional training video for DJ's. In 1995 I rescripted, rewrote and
reproduced this training video, making it the best training video in the market.
This video is called the "DJ's Guide to Running Weddings". It is a complete
training package, directed to the professional DJ. It has been marketed
nationally since 1995. My combined experience gives me a unique
understanding of the roles of the DJ, Videographer and Photographer in
servicing our wedding clients. It is this combined experience that provided me
with the depth of experience to write this book.

Table of Contents

1 Procedure, Protocol and 17 Limo Services . . .21

Etiquette. . .3 18 Photography . . .22
2 Seating . . .5 19 Wedding at Reception Halls . . .25
3 Procession . . .7 20 Less Formal Events . . .28
4 Recession . . .9 21 More Formal Hall Weddings . . .29
5 Receiving Line . . .10 22 Ethnic Weddings . . 31
6 Seating at the Head Table . 10 23 Outdoor Weddings . . .32
7 Wedding Toasts . . .11 24 Activities - The Dollar Dance . . 34
8 Wedding Cake . . 11 25 Activities - The English Toast . . 36
9 The Bride and her day . . .12 26 DJs and Bands – Setting up . . .37
10 Confirm Everything . . .12 27 DJs Instructions to Wedding Party .
11 Professionally Orchestrated .39
Weddings . . .12 28 Reception Lines . . 42
12 Catering Firms / Halls . . .14 29 Blessings . . .42
13 The Formal Photography 30 Toasts . . .42
Session . . 16 31 Cutting of the Cake . . .43
14 Receiving Lines . . .17 32 Parents Dances . . .44
15 Introduction (The Wedding 33 Garter and Bouquet . . 47
Party) . . .18 34 Last Dance
16 Cake-Cutting (Activity) . . .19

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1. Procedure, Protocol and Etiquette

Having an understanding of proper etiquette will help you follow proper

procedure and help you answer any direct questions. As usual, consider not
only what is proper along with what is traditional or common for your section of
the country, but also what is most comfortable and desirable for the Bride and
Groom.

The following information pertains to all weddings.

The Bride will have an honor attendant (maid, matron or maiden of honor).
The Matron of Honor is a married woman, the Maid of Honor is a single
woman and the maiden of honor is a young child. The Bride can have more
than one Maid of Honor. The Maid of Honor will precede the Bride and her
father during the processional. The Maid of Honor assists the Bride with her
train and veil for the processional, during the ceremony, and the recessional.
She might be called upon to hold the Bride’s bouquet during the ceremony.
She carries the Grooms wedding ring until needed. She will stand next to the
Groom (on his right) in the receiving line and will sit on the left side of the
Groom at the head table (if it’s a seated reception). She and the Best Manwill
be announced to the reception guests before the Bride and Groom. She may
dance with the Best Manafter the Bride and Groom’s first dance. At all times,
she will provide assistance to the Bride, before, during and after the wedding.

The Best Man sees that the Groom is at the church on time. He also checks on
details (i.e. bills for the flowers, payment for the minister). He might sign the
marriage license as a witness with the Maid of Honor. He carries the Bride’s
wedding ring until needed. He oversees the ushers and may stand in the
receiving line. He is announced with the Maid of Honor to the reception guests
before the Bride and Groom. He may dance with the Maid of Honor after the
Bride and Groom’s first dance. He sits to the right of the Bride and proposes
the first toast to the new couple. He ensures that the reception goes as
planned and no practical jokes are played on the Bride and Groom. Also, he
makes sure that the car is not overly decorated and the windshield is
unobstructed. Lastly, he assists the Bride and Groom to the car and drives
them to the airport, etc.

Bridesmaids walk first in the procession. They may or may not be escorted by
ushers or Groomsmen. They may welcome guests in the receiving line. They
may be announced to the guests at the reception, before the Best Man and the
Maid of Honor. They may dance with the ushers during the Bride and Groom’s
first dance. They may sit alternately with the ushers at the head table, if there
is a head table.
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Ushers seat the guests at the wedding ceremony. They assemble near the
entrance and review any special seating requests. They offer their right arms to
each woman as she arrives. The new trend though, is for ushers to just lead
people to their seats when they greet them, saying, “Please follow me.” They
seat the oldest women first, if several guests arrive together. In Christian
weddings, friends of the Bride are seated on the left and friends of the Groom
are seated on the right. (If there are more guests for one side, the guests can be
seated on both sides.) The ushers unroll the aisle runner, tie pew ribbons (if
used), and participate in both the procession and recession. They
(Ushers/Groomsmen) sit at the head table but do not stand in the receiving
line (if there is one). They (Ushers/Groomsmen) may be announced to the
reception guests before the Bride and Groom. They (Ushers/Groomsmen) may
dance with the Bridesmaids during the Bride and Groom’s first dance and may
propose toasts to the Bride and Groom. They will usually decorate the car.
Their should be one designated head usher and his role is to understand any
special seating arrangements.

Groomsmen are part of the wedding party and walked down the aisle with the
Bridesmaids and stand at the alter with the groom. They can be considered to
be the male alternative of the Bridesmaid.

It is common for couples to have the groomsmen also performing the role of the
ushers and the men chosen are usually Usher/Groomsmen. This is often done
to minimize the size of the wedding party.

If their are designated Ushers and Groomsmen, then the Groomsmen would be
the Groom’s brothers, close relatives, the Bride’s brothers and other close
friends. These are the men that would be standing with the Groom during the
ceremony and who would escort Bridesmaids and sit at the head table.

The use of Ushers and Groomsmen would depend on the wishes of the Bride
and Groom and family tradition.

Groomsmen sit at the head table but do not stand in the receiving line (if there
is one). Groomsmen may be announced to the reception guests before the
Bride and Groom. Groomsmen may dance with the Bridesmaids during the
Bride and Groom’s first dance and may propose toasts to the Bride and Groom.
They will usually decorate the car.

The Flower Girl may walk alone, with the ring bearer, or with another flower
girl. She immediately precedes the Bride. She usually scatters rose petals in

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the Bride’s path. She is not in the receiving line, nor does she sit at the head
table. She may be announced to the guests with the ring bearer.

The Ring Bearer immediately precedes the flower girl or the Bride down the
aisle.

The Mother of the Bride may accompany the Bride down the aisle (customary
in Jewish weddings). She is the last to be seated and would be escorted by her
son, or sons, or the head usher. She is the first guest to be ushered out. She
serves as the official hostess. She is at the head of the receiving line and has a
place of honor at the parents’ table (usually there are two parents’ tables). She
and her husband (or escort) may join the newlyweds on their first dance.

Father of the Bride rides with the Bride in the limousine and escorts her into
the ceremony site. He usually walks the Bride down the aisle, perhaps with
the mother.* If the father is deceased, another male might escort the Bride or
the Bride’s mother, or the Bride might choose to walk alone. In any case, this
person gives the Bride away. In some Protestant services, the father /escort
remains at the altar with the Bride until asked, “Who gives this Bride to be
married?” After the response, he will take his seat. He joins the Bride’s
mother in the first pew, and he may mingle with guests instead of standing in
the reception line. He may dance with his wife, joining the Bride and Groom
during the first dance. He may make a toast or welcoming speech after the
best man, and the Groom (and Bride) have responded. At Jewish weddings,
the Father of the Bride offers blessings over the wine and bread before the
meal begins.

Parents of the Groom: The mother is escorted to her seat by the head usher
(unless her son is in the wedding party), followed by her husband, just before
the Mother of the Bride. In a traditional Jewish service, both parents might
escort the Groom down the aisle. The Groom’s mother stands second in the
reception line. If the husband is in the reception line, he might be to the left of
his wife (I would propose the parents be paired, i.e. mothers, then fathers).
They may also join the newlyweds on their first dance.

2. Seating

Seating: Bride’s family on the left and Groom’s family on the right. If it is a
large wedding party, the first row might be reserved for the Bridesmaids and
ushers, with the second row being reserved for the parents. If their are no
Bridesmaids or ushers, or the Bridesmaids and ushers are to remain standing
during the service, then the first row might be reserved for the parents. The

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grandparents and immediate family might be seated directly behind the
parents.

For divorced parents who are estranged/ or who prefer to be seated separately,
the mother would sit in the first pew with the father sitting one or two pews
behind her. Seat guests from front to back and seat them as they arrive.

How you seat the guests will depend on the number of people expected to
attend the service, the length of the aisle and the number of pews. You do want
to seat the guests to the front of the church.

Many churches are designed where there is a main door to the church. As you
enter the church there is a back hallway, which is separated from the main
chapel area, and there might be a set of doors separating the main chapel area
from the back hallway.

It is a good idea to seat guests as they arrive. You want to keep the back of the
church from filling up with guests who might be milling around awaiting the
arrival of the Bride. The more people in the back hallway, the more confusion
there will be.

The moments immediately preceding the processional are sometimes

confusing. Grandparents, Mothers of the Bride and Mothers of the Groom
should remain in the back of the church or hall.

Grandparents and mothers are escorted to their seats immediately prior to the
procession. This pre processional seating is usually to designated music and is
a queue that the processional is starting. The photographer also wants to be in
the aisle to photograph parents and grandparents as they are being escorted to
their seats.

In Jewish weddings, it is customary for both mother and father to escort the
Groom and the Bride down the aisle.

In catholic weddings, it also becoming common to see both parents escorting

their children down the aisle. When both parents are in the processional, we
would still want to identify the grandparents. The grandparents are the last
people seated prior to the start of the processional.

Countdown: At the church or hall, you might find the bridal couple and
parents mingling with the guests .

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Ten minutes before the ceremony, the bridal party, attendants, and parents
should be assembled in the hallway.

Minutes before the ceremony, Pre Wedding Processional, the grandparents and
mothers would be escorted to their seats (usually on queue). Grandparents are
seated first, followed by the mother and father of the Groom. The Mother of the
Bride is seated last.

Two ushers walk in step to the front of the aisle to lay the aisle runner
(optional) and/or unroll the pew ribbons (optional, used in Protestant
weddings). You will seldom see pew ribbons. If they are being used, they will
be unrolled before the processional.

Ceremony time: Traditional style (with the father escorting the Bride) - The
minister or JP takes his/her place at the head of the aisle. The Groom and the
Best Manmight be with the JP or minister. Usually, the Groom is at the end of
the aisle, on the right (as we look into the church). Standing to his right would
be the best man.

As dad escorts the Bride to the end of the aisle, he will turn to the Bride, lift up
her blusher (veil) and give her a kiss. He will then turn to the Groom, and
shake his hand. The Bride will step forward to advance with the Groom. The
Bride’s father will step back and then cross the aisle to take his seat on the left
side of the aisle (Christian weddings).

Dad should be careful to simply stand in place and let the Bride go forward
before crossing the aisle. It is too easy to try to step over the train and step on
it. If I am in the back of the church immediately before the procession, I would
remind the Bride and her father not to step out into view until the aisle is
clear, to hold her flowers low (most bouquets, not roses). I would remind dad
that (1) they want to wait for the aisle to be clear before they step out into view.
All of the attention should be on them. (2) He offers his arm to the Bride (Dad
will be on the Bride’s right). (3) He escorts the Bride to the end of the aisle
then turns to the Bride, lifts her blusher, gives her a kiss, then turns to the
Groom to shake his hand, then steps back allowing the Groom to escort the
Bride forward to the celebrant. Dad does not want to step over the Bride’s veil,
but to stay in place and wait for the Bride’s train to have passed.

3. Processional

Seating of Grandparents and Parents / Pre Processional: Prior to the

processional, the grandparents might be escorted to their seats, followed by the
mother of the Groom, followed by the Mother of the Bride. The usher escorting
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the Mother of the Bride to her seat would then go directly to the aisle runner
and unroll it.

The seating of parents can be thought of as part of the processional. The

mothers are usually escorted to their seats on queue. The wedding coordinator
in the back of the church would signal the organist. The organist usually plays
a specific song. (In catholic weddings, this is usually “Ave. Maria”.).

The Mother of the Bride is the last to be seated and would be escorted by her
son, or sons, or the head usher.

The ushers and Bridesmaids may or may not be seated during the ceremony.
Usually in a catholic mass (about a 45 minute service), they would be seated.

This means the first row would be occupied by the ushers and Bridesmaids.
Otherwise, the parents of the Bride and Groom would be in the first row.
Grandparents and/or siblings would be seated in the row directly behind the
parents. If the parents are divorced, the father and his escort would be seated
behind the mothers grandparents. Close friends, guests and elderly friends
might be designated to sit directly behind the father (if divorced) or
grandparents.

With a Jewish service, the parents might stand through the service with the
Bridesmaids and ushers. This means grandparents and siblings would be
seated in the first row. If the mother is divorced, her companion might be in the
second row. If the father is divorced, his companion might be in the following
row.

Seating List:
Row 1 - If Bridesmaids and ushers are seated, they sit in first row
Row 2 - Parents of the Bride or Groom, or Mother and escort (if divorced)
Row 3 - Grandparents and siblings
Row 4 - Father and escort if divorced
Row 5 - Fathers parents and family (if divorced)
Row 6 - Special guests and elderly family members

Processional: Their are many styles of processionals and the style of

processional is usually dependent on the officient. If the wedding is being held
at a four star hotel, the banquet coordinator might coordinate the service and
direct everyone.

In catholic services, I have seen a number of different approaches to the

processional. It is not uncommon for the Groom and Best Man to be with the
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priest or pastor in the front of the church near the alter. Just before the
service, the ushers might file down the side aisles and join the priest, Groom
and best man. At the time of the processional, two designated ushers might
unroll the aisle runner and then return to the Grooms side by returning down
the side aisle.

In many services, the ushers and Groomsmen would be the first to come down
the aisle. The order is usually based on height. This could be single or double
file. Next would be the Bridesmaids, junior Bridesmaids, Maid of Honor, ring
bearer (could walk with flower girl) flower girl and Bride with her father or
escort.

In catholic services, I am seeing a style of processional, where the priest would

lead the wedding party down the aisle. The ushers would usually be paired
followed by the Groom and his parents, the Bridesmaids, junior Bridesmaids,
Maid of Honor, ring bearer, flower girl and Bride with her parents.

The biggest problem with this style of processional is that the people are always
too close to each other. Men, when left to their own inclinations will walk too
close to each other and too fast. A good rule of thumb is to keep a distance of
10 rows between individuals or sets. The aisle should be clear of everyone when
the Bride and her parents step out into the aisle,

One observation is that most people tend to walk too fast during both the
processional and recessional. You should walk in measured steps and be
walking slow enough to be able to look at and recognize your friends as you
walk down the aisle.

Processional Order:
Catholic Alternate Jewish
Ushers (optional) Ushers (by height) Bride’s grandparents
Bridesmaids (single file) Mother, Groom, Father Grooms grandparents
Junior Bridesmaids Bridesmaids Ushers
Maid of Honor Junior Bridesmaids Father, Groom, Mother
Ring Bearer Maid of Honor Bridesmaids
Flower Girl Ring Bearer Honor Attendant
Bride, Father Flower Girl Ring Bearer
Mother, Bride, Father Flower Girl
Father, Bride, Mother

An Informal Procession: At a small wedding, the Bride is preceded by one or

more attendants and escorted into the room by her father. There might not be
a procession – only the Bride and Groom standing before the minister/JP.
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They might even have the guests stand in a circle around them (usually a very
small gathering).

4. Recession

Recession: The newlyweds will lead the recession of the wedding party, in their
first walk as husband and wife. The rest of the wedding party will leave in the
reverse order of the procession. Usually the recession will be double file even if
the procession was single file.

The order will usually be the newlyweds, followed by the wedding party,
parents of the Bride, parents of the Groom and family members.

Tips on the Recessional: As the Bride and Groom turn to face their guests,
they are usually quite nervous. They will usually be stepping down and will be
looking to the floor for the first step. Before the couple steps down from the
aisle, they should look into the aisle, is the photographer there. If not, was the
photographer caught off guard by the end of the wedding? Is he coming to the
end of the aisle? Wait for the photographer. Noticing the photographer is in
position, if the couple were to pause, look into each others eyes, and then
follow that with a kiss, what a great image for the photographer, the parents,
the guests and anyone else with a camera.

Sometimes the Groom will take the Bride’s arm. The Groom should be sure to
offer his arm to the Bride. The Bride, taking the Grooms arm will create a great
image and generate a sense of comfort.

Many times you will see the Bride and Groom walk very quickly down the aisle.
Sometimes they are almost running. This is a very normal response to the
nervousness they might be experiencing.

The weddings that have always impressed me the most were those in which the
couple might stop at their parents pew and embrace them. Then casually walk
back down the aisle. They are walking slow enough to establish eye contact
with their guests and to enjoy the moment.

5. Receiving Line

The Receiving Line: Should form after the ceremony but before the reception.
If you are taking wedding photographs at the church, then you might want the
receiving line at the reception site. The hostess of the reception party should be
the first person in line. This is usually the Mother of the Bride.

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Many times the Bride and Groom will be paying for the wedding and reception
party. In this case the Mother of the Bride would still be the first person in the
receiving line. The Mother of the Bride would be accompanied by her husband.
The Mother of the Groom and her husband would follow. Then the Bride and
Groom. It is optional for honor attendants and other attendants to be in the
receiving line.

According to the rules of etiquette, fathers were not required to be in the

receiving line. While not required by etiquette, it is so common to see fathers in
receiving lines that it seems unusual when the fathers are not there.

In cases of divorce, it is the parents of the Bride and Groom that should be in
the receiving line. Spouses of the divorced parent could stand behind their
counterpart.

I have found that in cases of divorce, if you pair the mothers and then pair the
fathers, makes for a more comfortable situation. The parents can introduce
their friends to each other.

6. Seating at the Head Table

Seating: At the head table the seating would be the Groom on the Bride’s left,
Best Man on the Bride’s right. The Maid of Honor would be on the Grooms left
and the Bridesmaids and ushers seated alternately. Children would sit with
their parents.

You will sometimes see head tables where all of the women are on the left and
all the men are on the right. You might also see the Best Man seated to the left
of the Groom and the Maid of Honor seated to the right of the Bride. Seating
the men and women as couples is always preferable.

Instead of a head table with the wedding party, it is common to see a smaller
table at which the Bride and Groom are seated. You might also see a round
table at which the Bride and Groom and Best Man and Maid of Honor and
selected guests are seated.

Wedding Toasts: The Best Man makes the first reception toast to the Bride and
Groom. It is sometimes customary for the Maid of Honor to propose a toast. This
can be followed by the Groom toasting his Bride and her parents. The Bride
might rise (not very often) followed by parents (not very often).

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It is traditional, and almost a requirement, that the Best Man toast the wedding
couple. It is also becoming more common for the Maid of Honor to toast the
couple. You will very rarely see the Bride or Groom toasting their spouses and
in-laws.

The Wedding Cake: The Bride and Groom feed each other cake to symbolize
their union. After they feed each other, the Bride and Groom might serve their
new in-laws their pieces, although this is not very common.

The Bride will feed the Groom and then the Groom will feed the Bride. The
wedding couple should reframe from any playfulness at this time. Playfulness
always seems to start with the Bride teasing the Groom. The Groom will usually
respond and it doesn’t take much to make this an unpleasant situation for the
Bride.

If the couple uses forks, it will make for a great picture and minimize the
possibility of playfulness.

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9. The Bride and Her Special Day
It’s essential to understand the importance of this day to the Bride. It might
seem frivolous to make that obvious statement, however, most men don’t
understand the emotions involved and the sensitivity you have to exercise
when working with the Bride to make this day perfect for her.

This is her special day, a day of magic in which everything and everyone-DJs,
Bands, Caterers, and Photographers contribute to this perfection. These are
the people the Bride has chosen to make the dreams of her wedding become
the reality of the day.

10. Confirm Everything. In planning for the day, you must confirm the day
with everyone that you have hired. Be sure to make these confirmation calls.
Limo drivers should be called at least three days in advance of your wedding
day. Make sure they have a map and the schedule of activities has been
identified. Limo drivers will often want to leave the church immediately after
the wedding and they don’t like to make stops on the way to the reception hall.
Photographers and videographers should be called a week prior to your
wedding day.

When confirming the details of the day with the cateror, be sure to review your
schedule with them. Allow time to get from the church to the hall. Be sure to
schedule time for the family portrait session (at least ½ an hour) and then the
announcement into the hall and first dance will take at least 15 minutes.

After identifying these activities, you can establish a realistic time for the meals
to be served. Don’t let the banquet coordinator rush the photography session
because they did not schedule the activities of the day.

11. Professionally Orchestrated Weddings

Some weddings are special because the catering/hotel staff is much more
involved in the coordination of the reception. The DJ/band and photographer
will usually find the room captain approaching them with a written agenda of
the day’s events. The scheduling and timing will be much more closely
watched and there will be a very visible presence of the staff and room captain.
The schedule of events will be strictly coordinated by the Banquet Coordinator
or Room Captain.

These receptions are often more discrete and less pretentious. The Bride might
not want an announcement of the wedding party to her guests. She might
prefer entering the room with the Groom and proceeding to meet and greet
guests. You might also hear your Bride say she does not want ceremonial

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dances announced, i.e. the dance with her father. The dance will still take
place, but the Bride might simply tell the band to play a song for her dance
with her father. This will usually be coordinated by the room captain or the
DJ/Band.

This “No Fanfare” approach is most common with the cake-cutting. Music will
be played, but it might be simply an instrumental and not your typical cake-
cutting music, i.e. “Songbird” by Kenny G.

For this style of wedding the bouquet may be thrown, but it’s unlikely that
there will be a tossing of the garter.

The Bride will usually be clear on what she wants and how she wants these
events handled. The Room Captain will usually be providing direction on every
event.

The DJ or band should be aware of the style that is desired for the reception.
For this type of reception, discretion should be practiced. Recognizing this
desire for discretion, you should be careful to talk with the Bride about the
style of the introduction as well as the other activities you will be announcing.

DJ’s usually have a style of pumping up the guests and getting a strong
reaction when introducing the wedding party. With upscale weddings, the DJ
might want to project a more formal appearance.

The Bride and Groom need to discuss the style of announcement that they are
expecting from their announcer or DJ.

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12. Catering Firms and Halls

The following is a list of activities that halls and catering firms will perform to
make the wedding reception so special:

Greeting the Bride and Groom on their Arrival

These halls and caterers always have a member of the staff at the door waiting
to greet the Bride and Groom and usher them into the building. Whenever
possible, you should make a point of having someone at the door to personally
greet the Bride and Groom on their arrival.

Work with the Photographer

These halls are also careful to greet the photographer on his/her arrival and to
determine if the formal photography session has been completed. If the formal
photography sessions (posed photography) have not yet taken place, then these
halls would check with the photographer to see how much time is required and
remind them of the schedule that has been pre-arranged.

Often the hall or caterer will have a printed agenda form with the schedule
carefully outlined. It is important that the Bride and the catering firm have
discussed the schedule for the day. By identifying the start of the wedding
ceremony, the duration of the ceremony, the time needed for the receiving line
(possibly at the church), the amount of time necessary to commute to the hall,
and then allowing approximately an extra hour for the photography session,
the caterer can prepare and work with agenda/schedule that is realistic with
the interests of the client in mind.

If the catering firm has only allowed a half hour for photography and it is a
large wedding party, this is being unrealistic. If the wedding party consists of
only the Bride and Groom, best man, Maid of Honor and a limited number of
relatives, then a half-hour might be more appropriate.

To avoid confusion, a copy of the schedule should be provided to the Bride and
Groom after your consultation and well before the wedding day. The couple
can then show this schedule to their photographer and DJ/Band.

Many times the hall will attempt to push the photographer to complete the
family photography session in as short a period of time as possible. The
photographer should work quickly, but he/she must have completed all of the
family photography before the wedding party is announced into the hall. I have
seen many weddings where the banquet hall coordinator did not schedule time
for photography and then tried to minimize the impact by trying to skip the

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photography session or minimize the session. It is more important to complete
the family photography than serve the meal according to the kitchen schedule.

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Copyright Henry Baker, Baker Studios [Link] and DJ Chris Baker at [Link]
MAKING YOUR CUSTOMERS NEEDS YOUR FIRST PRIORITY

Too often catering firms seem to only focus on the meal. When the
photographer arrives at the hall, he/she will sometimes find themselves in a
situation which feels unfriendly. The catering firm (or hall) is focused on the
serving of the meal as their first priority. They might want to cut short the
photography session or dictate the program to the DJ/Band.

The DJ is impacted by the hall or caterer when they direct the DJ not to have
the first dance until after the meal has been served.

A good DJ will always try to play music which will make people want to dance
throughout the evening, even during the meal. The sooner the DJ gets people
dancing, the more the guests will join together to participate in the celebration,
making the party a more memorable experience for the Bride and Groom.

The DJ should try to schedule the first dance as soon as possible. After the
first dance and during the meal, the DJ might play music which people would
want to dance to.

(Protocol dictates that no one should dance until after the Bride and Groom
have their first dance. Many older guests know of this unwritten rule and will
not go onto the dance floor until after the Bride and Groom have their first
dance.)

The one overriding issue is that this is the Bride’s day. All of the people
working for the Bride should understand the importance of each event. If the
DJ or photographer experience difficulties working with the banquet
coordinator, these difficulties should not be obvious to our wedding party.

It is important that the caterer or hall talk with the Bride about the schedule
for the day. If it is a large wedding party, an hour might be allocated for the
formal photography. A schedule should be provided to the Bride, which she can
make available to the photographer. If the photographer has any concerns with
the schedule, he will be able to make them known to the Bride so that these
issues will have been worked out before the wedding day.

The DJ should also review the schedule of the day with his clients. The DJ
needs to know when the guests will be arriving at the hall and when he might
expect to be announcing the wedding party into the hall. The DJ also needs to
know if the receiving line was at the church or if he will be coordinating a
receiving line at the hall.

I remember one situation at a small hall where there was little room and the
exterior provided nothing of particular interest for photographs. However, the
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caterer was there to greet the wedding party on arrival. When she learned that
the formal photography had not taken place on route to the hall, she suggested
a location that was near. The caterer then sent staff members off-site with food
and beverage for the wedding party (during this session); this support was
unexpected and much appreciated. The caterer clearly understood her
business and was able to contribute in a very positive way.

The family photographs must be completed before the Bride and Groom are
introduced into the hall and the meal is served. The wedding party should
never be introduced into the hall until after all of the family photography is
completed.

After the Bride and Groom are announced into the hall, the party has begun
and no one will want to step out to a side room for photographs.

13. The Formal Photography Session at the Hall

If the wedding is at the hall or at an estate, recommend that the formal

photography be done earlier in the day, before the ceremony. This will make
the day much more relaxed and it will allow the Bride and Groom the
opportunity of spending more time with their guests.

If the service is held off site, the first thing you must do is determine if the
formal photography has been completed. This will impact your schedule for
serving the guests. It might be helpful to talk through the schedule with the
couple prior to their wedding day and help them understand the importance of
allowing adequate time.

If the photography is to take place on site, talk with the photographer and
inform him of the schedule you are using. Listen to the photographer and
work with him to make sure everyone is satisfied with the arrangements.

Note that breakout rooms for photography should be draped from ceiling to
floor, and the ceilings should be ten feet or higher-without lights extending
down into the scene. Any kind of broken background will be distracting and
not look professional in the finished photographs. Rooms with fireplaces will
work, but a business conference room complete with low hung lights,
paintings, and mounted white boards, just won’t be appropriate. As a matter of
fact, this can affect the halls or hotels ability to book weddings and will
certainly be noticed by Bridesmaids and other guests as they think about their
own nuptial plans.

If the hall does not have an area for the formal photography session and the
weather does not permit outside photography, the photographer might be

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forced to use an area inside the main hall. This is difficult because guests will
be interacting with the wedding party and members of the wedding party might
find themselves wandering off as they engage with these guests. The guests
with their instamatic cameras will be all over the photographer as he sets up
appealing group photographs. The photographer will also have difficulty
positioning people to control the impact of the background scenes on the
photographs.

The formal wedding photographs are a major event in the day. If their is no
break out room for photography, then the people helping to coordinate the
event should provide assistance in helping the photographer clear an area of
the room that can be used for the formals. (Formals are the posed photographs
of the Bride and Groom with their families and with the wedding party.)

14. Receiving Lines

During the consultation, you would stress the merits of having a receiving line
at the church. If there is no receiving line at the church, then you will have to
have one at the hall. This formality should be attended to as soon as possible.
It is normally scheduled right after the photography session.

If the guests are having cocktails in another area of the building, then I would
suggest positioning the wedding party at the entrance to the main room, so the
guests will be going through the receiving line as they enter that room.

However, if the guests are already having cocktails in the main room, then
your only recourse is to announce the wedding party to the guests and direct
them to form a receiving line. You would then have the DJ or band call the
guests, by table, to go through the receiving line.

If you are at a small hall and the number of guests is limited, then you may be
able to dispense with the receiving line, but the Bride and Groom should then
make a point of visiting every table to welcome their guests. Visiting the tables
should happen as soon as possible, right after the blessing and the toast.

When setting up a receiving line, try to minimize the number of people in the
line. The only people that are required are the parents, the Bride and Groom,
and the Best Man and Maid of Honor. ( You could exclude fathers if either
couple is divorced and the fathers do not object. Otherwise, you may wish to
have the mothers stand together and the fathers stand together in the
receiving line.)

Staff members of the catering firm or hall should be present and visible at all
times. The room captain should be in the immediate area.

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Be Ready With the Toast

Usually in larger function facilities, waiters and waitresses will be at their

stations as the guests enter the room. They should commence the pouring of
champagne once half the guests have entered the room. This would be done
prior to the entrance of the wedding party, and then the toast will be offered
early in the program. There are usually two options: One can introduce the
couple to their guests and directly announce their first dance followed by the
blessing and the toast, or after introducing the Bride and Groom, you can bring
them directly to the head table for the blessing and the toast.

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15. Introduction (the Wedding Party)

The DJ or MC should have already met with the room captain and identified
his/her role. If the DJ will be announcing the wedding party to the guests and
the DJ appears to be capable, then both the room captain and the DJ should
introduce themselves (and head waitress) to the wedding party prior to
announcing the wedding party to their guests.

The DJ might handle the line-up of the wedding party and review the
pronunciation of names. However, the final address to the party should be
made by the Room Captain, identifying where people will go as they enter the
room.

A practice that is becoming more common is for the room captain to announce
the wedding party to the guests. This method personalizes the role of the hall
staff as hosts of the event and adds to the perceived professional value of the
services being provided by the hotel. It usually appears that the Banquet
Coordinator does not do as good a job as an experienced DJ. As a DJ, you
should work with the Bride to make sure that she makes her wishes known to
the Hotel. The Bride and Groom can dictate their interests to the Hotel staff,
but this should be worked out well before their wedding day.

If the Bride and Groom are going directly into their first dance, members of the
catering staff should be prepared to take the Bride’s bouquet and place it on
the head table. If catering staff are not available, then the DJ or room captain
should instruct the Maid of Honor to proceed to the corner of the dance floor
and wait for the introduction of the Bride. As the Bride and Groom are
announced to their guests and walk out onto the dance floor for their first
dance, the Maid of Honor can come out and take the Bride’s bouquet.

Many hotels will strictly coordinate the timing of events and will specify the
timing of these activities to the DJ or Band. The DJ or Band will usually
receive a written agenda of the day’s activities, which makes his/her job easier.

Dressing of Scenes

Whenever possible, you want to include flowers in scenes which are prominent
or are to be photographed. On the Bride and Groom’s introduction into the
room, a member of the catering service should be there to take the Bride’s and
Bridesmaid’s flowers and place them on the head table. Then when the Bride
is ready to cut the cake, the Bride’s flowers should be placed on the table with
the cake.

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Drink glasses and clutter should be cleared from the head table through the
meal and before photographs are taken. You want the focus clearly on the
subjects themselves.

If you are coordinating the cake cutting ceremony, put the Bride’s flower on the
table with the cake. You want to add color to the scene. You always want to
position the Bride so we see her gown. The Groom would be positioned to the
right of the Bride and behind (usually it is a small circular table that the cake
is on). The couple should have inside arms around each other and the knife
should be handed to the Groom (his open right hand). You then place the
Bride’s left hand on top of the Grooms right hand. This way we get a nice
symmetrical image of the couple (heart shaped) and we see the diamond on her
ring finger. The Bride should place her left hand on his knife hand.

As a DJ working with an inexperienced photographer, you are going to stun

the Bride, with your attention to detail. If you’re the photographer, the couple
will be pleased.

16. Cake-Cutting Activity

You really want to work with the DJ or Band to control this situation, so that
decorum is maintained. After all, this is a formal event. Some hotels make a
rule of providing forks and a plate for this activity. By setting a plate behind
the cake, with forks, you can talk to the Bride and Groom about using the forks
to give their photographs a classier look. The use of forks looks good and
avoids the problem of inappropriate gestures during this ceremony.

You always want to avoid any smashing when coordinating this event. By
making sure that the photographer and video person are ready and on que
there will be no delay. If your couple is standing behind the cake waiting for
the photographer, you might hear a lot of taunting and encouragement for the
Groom to smash the Bride.

When talking with the couple, you might also want to say something to them to
encourage good behavior. Another technique is to set up a plate behind the
cake with forks and a napkin. Tell the couple to use the forks to feed each
other. It will present a great image to the photographer.

I have been at weddings where the cake cutting has gotten out of hand. And it
usually started when the Bride mischievously brushed some icing on the
Grooms nose.

SERVING WEDDING CAKE FOR DESSERT

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If the wedding cake is to be served as dessert, you will want to consider the
amount of time that the catering staff will have for preparing and serving it.
The caterer might request the DJ to schedule the cake cutting as soon as
possible. You might then consider introducing the bridal couple, then
announce the cake cutting, followed by the first dance, blessing, and toast.

If the cake is not being served for dessert, then you might be scheduling the
cake cutting somewhere between the first and third course. This would usually
be followed by the parents dances.

Many catering firms will set up a dessert table, decorated by flowers, and have
someone cut and serve the cake to guests during the meal.

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17. Limo Services

It is quite common to have problems with the delivery of limo services. The
Bride and Groom should have confirmed the date, time, and location at least
two weeks in advance of the date. You should also make a point of delivering a
map to the limo service, so that there is no confusion about the route or
destination.

The Bride should also confirm all of the details of the limo service two days
before the wedding. If they misplaced the booking, they need time to schedule
a limo and get a driver.

The limo service should arrive at the Bride’s house one-half hour before
departure time. This will allow time for photographs, put the Bride at ease, and
make your job easier.

As the Bride leaves the limo to go into the church, she should have a
photograph of her father or escort helping her out of the limo. The limo driver
should know if the Bride hired a professional videographer and photographer
so he can arrive at the church fifteen minutes before the ceremony is
scheduled to start. Then the driver should keep the Bride in the car until both
the photographer and videographer are prepared to capture the Bride’s
entrance into the church.

In many instances the drivers will assist the Bride into the church by carrying
the Bride’s train. A good photographer, will include the Bride’s father in these
duties and ask the limo driver to stand out.

As the Bride and her dad walk up to the church, this makes for a great set of
photographs. If the limo driver is in the scene the photographs loose their
impact.

Once in the church, the driver will assist the Bride in moving off to the side or
into a side room (if available). The driver should then stay in the back of the
church and remain as unobtrusive as possible. At the time of the processional,
the driver can assist in securing and anchoring the runner.

The photographer and people associated with the church, should be in the
back of the church to provide some last minute direction prior to the
procession. This is not the role of the limo driver.

When the processional starts, it will be the job of the driver to assist the Bride
in assuring that her train is fully extended and spread as she prepares to walk
down the aisle. If the wedding is being videotaped, it might be helpful for the
driver to close the doors to the church to minimize background lighting
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problems for the videographer. The videographer might talk to the driver about
this duty.

After the service, there might be a reception line at the church. At this point,
the Maid of Honor should be providing assistance to the Bride, i.e. carrying her
train. There will usually be two glasses and a bottle of champagne in the limo.
The toast can be held outside or inside the car, depending on the
photographer and videographer. If the wedding is during the hotter summer
months, the Bride should make arrangements for some cold non-alcoholic
drinks to be available in the limo. The Bride and Groom might both find
themselves being terribly uncomfortable because of the hot weather and
require non-alcoholic refreshments as well

If it is a beautiful day and the grounds of the church are colorful, the
photographer might want to get photographs both in the church and on the
church grounds. This could be all of the formal poses. As a rule, it is best if the
photographer gets the formal photos as soon as possible. The limo service
should schedule with this in mind.

Many photographers like to take the Bride and Groom back into the church for
photographs of the Bride and Groom in a religious setting. If this session only
involves the Bride and Groom, it should be scheduled into the days activities.
These activities shouldn't require more than 20 minutes.

These activities should have been discussed with the Bride and the schedule
should allow for them.

In ten consecutive weddings, where Bride’s were photographed on location at

the church, the drivers approached me as well as the parents of the Bride. Most
drivers do not like these sessions and will try to cut them short. They will
remind you of the schedule, they will tell you that they have another wedding
and must leave soon. They will approach the Father of the Bride and tell him
their is a scheduling concern.

I the Bride wants the option of being photographed at the church or on the way
to the reception hall, maybe at a park, then she must work this into the
schedule and discuss the schedule with the limo company. The Father of the
Bride must be familiar with these details.

If the Bride would like to be photographed in the church after the service or on
church grounds, then she should have discussed this with the clergy. Many
clergy want to be able to leave immediately after the service and the last guest
has walked out the doors.

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If there is another event scheduled at the church within thirty minutes of the
end of her wedding, then she should not plan on photographs after the service.

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18. Photography

It is customary for the photographer to start at the Bride’s house. The

photographer usually budgets an hour for this activity and tries to be at the
church at least fifteen minutes before the service to photograph the ushers,
Groom, Best Man and the Groom’s parents.

At the Bride’s house, the photographer will usually want to focus on candids;
full length, three-quarters and full portrait photographs of the Bride. These
might include something in the bedroom, i.e. putting on the garter, getting
ready in front of a mirror, being attended to by mother or Maid of Honor.
Additional photographs should show the Bride with mother and father; Bride
with mother; Bride with father; mother; father; Bride with Maid of Honor
(posed); Bride with Bridesmaids; and Bride with family (brothers and sisters).
Two Photographs: Bride leaving the house with her father holding the door,
and the Bride being assisted into the car by dad can be set up and taken
before the photographer leaves. At the church, there will be a variety of
candids, specifically of ushers; Groom and best man; Groom and his family.

If the photographer starts at the Bride’s house and is not local to the area, it
might be a good idea if the photographer follows the limo to the church. Traffic
patterns in urban areas can be unpredictable and local drivers know all the
shortcuts. If you do find yourself in traffic, it isn’t that bad if you arrive late
with the Bride.

The photographer will need to talk with the mothers and check on the
presence of grandparents. He should queue the mothers and grandmothers to
wait for him so that he can get a photograph of them being escorted to their
seats. The photographer should also check with the ushers to see who will be
notifying the organist to start the processional. The processional actually starts
with the seating of the mothers, so the photographer should request that this
person notify him when the processional is about to start.

The photographer should know the style of the processional (single or double
file and if the Bride will be escorted by Dad or Dad and Mother. He should also
know who the family members are in the processional, so that he can be sure
to photograph them. The photographer will also need to check with the priest
or minister to see if there are any restrictions. Likewise, the Bride needs to be
aware of these restrictions well before her wedding day.

Just before the processional, the photographer will want to remind the
Bridesmaids of how they should carry their flowers and the importance of
spacing (ten rows minimum). The photographer should also remind the Bride

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and her dad that she should wait until the isle is clear before she starts down
the aisle.

The photographer will want to photograph the processional, the exchange of

rings, the kiss, and the recessional. For the recessional, the photographer
might pose the couple at the door, and then assist the wedding party in
setting up and organizing the receiving line.

The photographer needs to know the duration of the service, where the Bride
and Groom will be standing during the service and if they will be facing the
guests during the exchange of vows and exchange of rings. The photographer
also needs to know if their will be a lighting of a candle or any other activities of
importance during the service.

The photography session after the wedding might include a photograph in the
church. Some ministers and priests restrict this to an actual re-enactment of
the service and will not allow you to pose the Bride and Groom in the aisle.

The formal photographs, if possible, should be posed taking advantage of a

variety of settings-outside, if possible. These photographs should consist of the
Bride and Groom with ushers and Bridesmaids; Groom with ushers; Bride with
ushers; Groom with Bridesmaids; Bride and Groom with the Best Man and
Maid of Honor. At this point, the ushers and Bridesmaids are through. The
Groom and Bride can now be photographed with each set of parents. Now the
Groom can be photographed with his parents and his parents can be
photographed separately. Now take some photographs of special family
members, including Grandparents, and finally some of the Bride and Groom.

If at all possible, you might like to get the entire wedding party together at the
Bride’s house before the wedding. All of the formal photography can be
completed before the service, so that after the service you can proceed straight
to the reception. Many Bride’s do not like this option because they do not
want the Groom to see them before the service, but in some instances, this
practice makes the day’s schedule easier for everyone.

For all of the posed photographs it is important that the Bride be positioned
such that she is photographed at an angle and turning at the waist into the
camera. This will have a thinning effect and give an angle to the upper body
which will add energy to the photographs. The women should have their
flowers for every posed photograph. The bouquets should be smaller and have
pastel colors. The bouquets should be held low (at the waist) and care should
be taken with each persons stance. The back foot should be at a 45 degree
angle to the front foot and the weight should be on the back foot. If the women
are seated, their legs should always be crossed (at the ankles). Men should
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always have the front hand in their pants pocket and be turned into the
camera at an angle to show some of their shirt. These tips will enhance every
photograph.

During the reception the photographer will be taking candid pictures. These
will be of the dances, the toast, the cake-cutting activity, scenes of the party,
and then going-away scenes. Both the photographer and videographer will be
working hard through out the day. By the time the DJ introduces the wedding
party, the photographer will have already worked almost four hours. For that
reason, a carefully arranged schedule that has been agreed upon by the Bridal
Party is crucial for assuring that all the special memories of the day are
preserved on film.

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19. Weddings at Reception Halls

Before the day of the wedding, the DJ (Coordinator) should know:

1. The size of the wedding party

2. The number of ushers and Bridesmaids
3. The number of children in the wedding party (ring bearers/flower girls,
sometimes referred to as little Bride’s (in Spanish weddings) or junior
Bridesmaids).
4. The arrival time of the Bride and bridal party. Will they be on site or will
they be arriving at the hall just before the procession.
5. Issues regarding divorced parents. (You should know if both sets of
parents are still married.)
6. The name (and correct pronunciation) of the celebrant. Is this person
a Justice of the Peace, Minister, Priest, or Rabbi?
7. The time of the wedding rehearsal, if there is one.
8. The style of the processional.
9. The time that will be required for the wedding ceremony.
10. The music for the ceremony. Is their any special music that the Bride
would like for the ceremony?
11. Is the ceremony going to be held in the same room as the wedding
reception or will it be in a separate room?

Weddings at reception halls can vary dramatically. At a function hall which

specializes in weddings, you might find the room captain (function hall
coordinator, banquet facility manager) well organized and coordinating the
entire affair. Then, your main concern will be to move your equipment in and
set up. If the ceremony is going to be in a room separate from the main room,
then you might have to be prepared to provide music for the ceremony that will
require a separate sound system (possibly a powered speaker and portable tape
player or a large boom box i.e. BOSE Soundwave System). Since musical tastes
vary widely, the couple might have hired a two-or three-piece classical group to
provide background music for the ceremony.

You will need to determine your role in assisting with the ceremony,
particularly if the person in charge has not arranged all the details. Always
check with the room captain to review the format for the procession. Will it be
just the Maid of Honor preceding the Bride, or will there be ushers,
Bridesmaids, ring bearers and flower girls? If it is a full processional with
ushers and flower girls, will the processional be single file or double file?

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In a formal wedding, the mothers are the last ones to be seated. This is usually
on cue to a specific song. The bridal party would dispatch one of the ushers to
notify the organist, or the DJ, that the processional is about to start. The
processional actually begins with that one introductory song, which is the cue
for seating the mothers and extending the runner.

When a pre-chosen song is played, the mother of the Groom would then be
escorted to her seat by her son (if he is in the wedding party) or the head
usher, with her husband following. The Mother of the Bride would be escorted
to her seat immediately before the processional starts.

Once the mothers are seated, the runner would be extended. Usually, two
ushers have been designated for this job, and after the runner is extended, the
processional will start. The procession might require two songs: One song
would be for the Bridesmaids and the other would be for the Bride and her
father. As a courtesy, you should talk with the Justice of the Peace or
clergyman to let him/her know what you will be playing. You should also
review your understanding of the order of the processional, i.e. mothers seated,
runner extended, music for the procession, type of procession (single file).

The processional at a formal church service would include the seating of the
mothers, extension of a runner, and procession of ushers and Bridesmaids. At
a hall, you might not have any of this. Instead the Groom and Best Manmight
wait in a designated area where the ceremony is to be performed, and the
Bride would be escorted to that location by her father.

JPs usually conduct short ceremonies and provide less direction. On the other
hand, ministers or clergy are usually actively involved in defining the
procedure. Therefore, you need to check with the Minister/JP to determine
the approximate length of the service and to inform him/her of the music
selection. Ask for a signal to let you know when the service is coming to an
end.

Even in a full function facility, you might run into situations where the room
captain is inexperienced, so that you will need to become much more involved.
Be ready to handle this task. This would mean that you might have to give the
Groom instructions on procedure and where he should be standing for the
processional (usually handled by a minister). Be prepared to give the ushers
instructions on seating the guests, as well as on their other duties. You might
also have to go back to where the wedding party is assembled to deliver last
minute instructions for the bridal party just before the processional.

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Last minute instructions are normally delivered by the room captain. You
might also find the photographer taking an active role in setting up for the
processional. Meet with all of these people as soon as you can and determine
the extent of your involvement. If their plans are already made, then do not
override them, but be available to help. For weddings at halls, assistance might
be delivered by an experienced staff member of the catering service. Everybody
has his own idea as to how to organize and manage things, so talk with these
people and try to determine their preferences.

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Copyright Henry Baker, Baker Studios [Link] and DJ Chris Baker at [Link]
20. Weddings at halls and legion posts: Less formal events.

At halls and legion posts, it is common to be in a situation with seating at

round tables (with no special seating for the ceremony). This is a less formal
affair, usually for weddings with no Bridesmaids or ushers. In these cases, the
Bride and Groom might both be at the hall, in the main room, waiting for the
commencement of the ceremony. Also, there might not be a procession where
the Bride and Groom stand before the Minister/JP. With these smaller, less
formal weddings, you might have the guests stand in a circle around the Bride
and Groom.

Usually, there is a processional. The Bride would be preceded by one

attendant and escorted into the room by her father. The MC or DJ will meet
with all the parties to let them know the procedure you will be following. The
Bride and her party need to know where they will make their entrance when
you play the processional music.
The Groom and the Best Man will have to know where they will be standing.
On cue, usually with a nod from the JP, you will ask people to take their
seats:

For the DJ or MC:

Ladies and gentlemen, at this time I would like to introduce our justice of the
peace, the honorable __________________. He/she will be conducting the
wedding ceremony. At this time, could I ask everyone to please take their seats;
the wedding ceremony is about to commence. ( Please take your seat.)

This also could be done much less obtrusively, by simply walking up to people
or groups of people, asking them to take their seats and telling them that the
ceremony is about to start.

You should have the father, or a male escort, accompany the Bride to the area
set up for the ceremony. Also someone should have explained the procedure
to the Groom and Best Man, as well as to the Maid of Honor, the Bride, and her
escort.

For these informal weddings in an open room with seating at tables, it is

common to not have the seating of the mothers just before the ceremony.

You will need to check with the photographer to decide if he/she will be
escorting the wedding party out of the hall after the service and to decide how
much time they will need before you announce the Bride and Groom’s return
to the hall. When the Bride and Groom are ready, you will announce their re-
entrance, followed by the announcement of the first dance.
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Copyright Henry Baker, Baker Studios [Link] and DJ Chris Baker at [Link]
If it is a smaller hall, you might announce the Best Man and Maid of Honor,
and then the Bride and Groom. They might then go into a receiving line
(preferred) or directly into the first dance. If they do not go into a receiving
line, then the Bride and Groom should make a point of visiting all the tables to
welcome their guests. This should be done during the meal.

For this style of weddings you have to know the logistics. Is there only one
main room or are there several attached rooms? Where will the ceremony be
held? Where will the guests be eating? Will there be a meal or is it simply
hors d’oeuvres? If a meal, will it be buffet style or will it be served family style
(plates of food are put on the table and people serve themselves)?

How will the seating be arranged for the ceremony? Will it be auditorium style
or will people be seated at round tables?

After the service, will the Bride and Groom go to another area for photographs?

If the seating is auditorium style and the ceremony and reception are in the
same room, you will have to know who will be rearranging the seating after the
ceremony and the DJ or hall staff will have to usher the guests to another area
of the hall so that the seating can be re-arranged.

This could be accomplished by announcing to the guests that there will be a

rearrangement of the seating. Ask them to move to the area of the bar for
refreshments while the seating is being rearranged.

At these halls, you will usually find yourself in one main room and there will be
some confusion if you do not talk to the Bride and Groom about what will be
happening and when. This discussion should take place well before the
wedding day.

21. More Formal Hall Weddings:

With hall weddings there are usually fewer people in the wedding party. If
there are no ushers or Bridesmaids, you can expect the hall staff to be involved
with the seating of guests.

At the more exclusive halls, the room captain (banquet coordinator) is usually
well organized and has a very specific program. You will want to meet with this
person well in advance. For that reason, you need to know and understand the

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Copyright Henry Baker, Baker Studios [Link] and DJ Chris Baker at [Link]
program he/she will be using. Don't be afraid to offer suggestions and to talk
with whomever is in charge about the proposed program.

The DJ should be early; you have to be on site, talk with the room captain
(banquet coordinator) and set up at least half an hour before the guests start
arriving. When you are discussing the introduction of the wedding party, talk
about the way you would like to handle this activity. Have your agenda, your
wedding protocol sheet and your script for the announcements available.

Tips on assisting the wedding party prior to the ceremony:

The men should be wearing boutonnieres that were provided for them, and
these should be pinned on as soon as the flowers arrive.

If the wedding is at the hall, the Bride and Maid of Honor might arrive carrying
their flowers and bouquets. If the flowers are long stemmed roses, they might
have the plastic vials still attached to the stalks, and these vials should be
removed. Let them know that this should be done, as it will make for better
photographs. Since these vials are filled with water, a towel will be needed to
dry the stalks.

For wedding ceremonies where there is a more formal seating arrangement

(auditorium style), you want to seat the guests on their arrival, which helps to
minimize the number of people wandering around. Sometimes the Bride will
become very emotional just prior to the processional and the fewer people
wandering around and the less activity will help her maintain her composure.
It will also minimize any confusion, generate a more formal atmosphere, and
help everyone associated with the wedding do his job better.

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Copyright Henry Baker, Baker Studios [Link] and DJ Chris Baker at [Link]
22. Ethnic Weddings

During the consultation you should have determined the ethnicity of your
couple. This may be an important ingredient in helping you to service your
guests at the reception party. I list some music standards for various ethnic
groups. If you are dealing with Syrians, Armenians or an ethnicity you are not
familiar with, do not worry. The reason why the Bride and Groom hired you is
because they want a strong American flavor to the music being played at their
wedding. If they really wanted a very ethnic wedding they would have hired a
Greek or Syrian DJ and their guests would only hear Greek or Syrian music all
night. For ethnic weddings that your not familiar with, simply ask the Bride
and Groom to bring CD’s or Tapes and to identify the songs they would like you
to play. You only have to play a few of these songs through the evening and
you might only play them on request with someone telling you when you
should play a specific song.

If you are playing off of an ethnic band then you don’t want to play any ethnic
music. The band will cover the ethnic music, you cover the standards and top
40.

Jewish - Look at the Bobby Morganstern Jewish CD.

Italian - Tarantella, Lazy Mary - Lou Monte, Always You - Lou Monte
Irish - When Irish Eyes are Smiling - Charlie Taylor CD
The Irish Wedding Song (A great song) - Nole Henry
One Day at a Time - Richie O’Shay
Greek - Never 0n Sunday
Zorba
Spanish - Salsa, Meringue’s

You will find complete lists of music and links to wedding resources on my
website at [Link].

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Copyright Henry Baker, Baker Studios [Link] and DJ Chris Baker at [Link]
23. Outdoor Weddings and Receptions

Outdoor weddings pose special problems, so it is important to understand what

is going to be happening, where it will be happening, and the timing of these
events. You should also know if there will be shade or shelter for the wedding.
Will music be required? Will there be the extension of a runner? (Note:
runners pose special problems when used outside. They will lift up with the
slightest breeze. If there is any photography to be taken on the runner, the
creases will “jump out” in the photographs.) Only when you understand the
setting, will you be able to identify the issues you must confront.

If there is seating for an outside ceremony, are there enough seats for
everyone. Be sure to reserve the front row of seats for parents and elderly
family members. When announcing the start of the ceremony, you might want
to announce that the front row is reserved for family members. If seating is
limited, ask the younger people to stand.

If the wedding is unpretentious-no music, no formal processional, and simply

an exchange of vows-then there will not be as many details to attend to.
However, if there are a number of guests, formal seating, and music with a
formal processional, then your role will dictate your increased involvement,
such as music for the DJ or musicians.

For any outdoor wedding, you need a tent, tarp, or sheltered area for the DJ
and you have to be careful to ascertain if extension chords are needed, as well
as the length of these chords. If there is music, you should also consider a
dance floor, which has to be set up on level ground.

For outdoor weddings which are catered and for which there are a hundred or
more guests, you will usually find help from the caterer, and possibly from the
DJ or Band. It is helpful for the DJ and band to know what is expected of them
and what will be the role of the caterer. The reception might start with a
procession of the wedding party and family from the house to the tent (which is
on the grounds) and you should know this.

If the event is at a hall or country club with an attached tent, you will have to
get a feel for the logistics. Where is the dance floor? Where will the DJ or
Band be situated? Where will the guests be seated to enjoy their meal?

If it is a hot day and the band is situated in the hall, you might find all the
guests congregating outside, under the tent. You might find that it is not
practical to try to herd the guests into a hot hall for the announcements of the
wedding party. Given this situation, skip the announcement and simply have
the wedding party go outside and greet groups of people individually and
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Copyright Henry Baker, Baker Studios [Link] and DJ Chris Baker at [Link]
informally (without fanfare). Then the toast could come earlier in the day,
probably before the buffet line is started. The ceremonial dances might be held
later in the day, during or after the meal when it is more comfortable to direct
your guests into the building where the band or DJ is located.

Wooden dance floors are a must if you expect the guests to dance. If you are
trying to use a deck off of the house as the dance floor, then think about the
possibility of setting your equipment up offside the deck. Most decks will really
bounce when the dancing starts. If you have to set up on the deck, the only
other solution is to block off an area near the DJ equipment to isolate and
minimize the bounce. If your working with a smaller deck, this will not be an
option. Have the customer set up a tent alongside the deck and set up
alongside the deck. You can always use a wireless mike and stand on the deck
when you have to make announcements.

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Copyright Henry Baker, Baker Studios [Link] and DJ Chris Baker at [Link]
24. Activities - The Dollar Dance

I have received a number of inquiries concerning the Dollar Dance. I would

bring the Bride and Groom out onto the dance floor. I would then announce to
our guests that this is a dollar dance and invite the men to form a circle on the
dance floor.

The dance would be started with the Bride and Groom together but I would
quickly bring her father, brothers, uncles, etc., out onto the floor to dance with
her. The change-ups would come quickly, about every 10 to 15 seconds, and we
would try to arrange a situation where the Bride dances with all of the men in
the circle.

As I call for a change-up, the person dancing with the Bride would go back to
the circle. Then I might announce that the person to the right of this person
should come out onto the floor.

The key to handling this event is in the announcing. I might say something like
this,

“At this time I would like to give all of our men in the audience the
opportunity of dancing with our most beautiful Bride. I would like to call
our Bride and Groom onto the dance floor, and I would like all of our
men to form a circle around them.

Gentlemen, this is a Dollar Dance. This is your one opportunity to dance

with our Bride. We will also be asking our Best Manto help us with this
event. Yes, If you would like to dance with (Bride’s name) ____________, you
will have to see our best man, (best man’s name) _________________.”

Another option is to include the Groom, so I might invite all the guests to form
a circle on the dance floor. I would start by putting the focus on the Bride by
calling her Father, Uncle’s, Grandfather, Brothers up to dance with the Bride.
Then I might bring the Groom back out with his mother and invite the women
to dance with the Groom. Both the Bride and the Groom would be in the same
circle, the Bride dancing with the men and the Groom dancing with the
women.

One variation of the dollar dance is to simply bring the Bride and Groom onto
the floor, announce the dance, and then the men and women get up to dance
with the Bride and Groom. Usually a line forms as the guests wait their turn to
dance with either the Bride or Groom.

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Copyright Henry Baker, Baker Studios [Link] and DJ Chris Baker at [Link]
You want to make sure that enough time is allotted to this dance so that
everyone who is interested will be able to dance with the Bride or Groom. This
might mean playing a second song.

The dollar dance is a great way of personalizing the wedding. This dance is
ethnic in origin and is well known to Italian Americans. If the Bride or Groom is
Italian, you should mention it during your consultation. However, some Bride’s
object to the requirement of a dollar to dance with them. One way to avoid this
is to make the Best Manpart of the event by announcing that anyone who
would like to dance with our Bride, must first see our best man.

When you bring the Groom onto the floor you can also ask the Maid of Honor
to participate in the same way as the best man. The Maid of Honor can then
collect the dollars for a dance with the Groom.

Another option to this dance is to call all the women out onto the floor with the
Bride and Groom. You then announce that the Groom will be dancing with all
the women. Every 15 seconds you would call another woman to dance with the
Groom; this can also be done with the Bride.

The dollar dance is a great activity. I like to use it whenever requested.

I show this in the video; you will notice that it was a fast dance. Using
discretion and knowing your couple, you do have the option of playing slow or
fast music.

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Copyright Henry Baker, Baker Studios [Link] and DJ Chris Baker at [Link]
25. Activities - English Toast

It is a British custom for traditional toasts to be done just after finishing the
meal. The Best Manleads the first toast and hands off, first to the father of the
Groom, then to the Father of the Bride, and so on, until everyone in
attendance who chooses has had an opportunity to toast the newlyweds. While
this may sound like the perfect recipe for a boring reception, it can liven up a
the dinner hour with humorous and tearful memories. The response can be
phenomenal and the toasting can last almost 30 minutes.

Will it work in America? When trying this with typical American wedding
clients, you must explain how it works in your pre-planning meeting. Then the
couple must inform their family and friends about this “new custom,” so
everyone comes prepared.

Just as the Bride and Groom are finishing their meal, but before all the guests
are done, we briefly explain the procedure, asking the guests to stand and
relate a touching or funny memory of the Bride or Groom, or simply offer best
wishes. Even if the Best Manhas already made the traditional toast, we have
him start off. You could also ask the Maid of Honor to begin. Using a wireless
microphone, the DJ or MC moves through the room to each person who wants
to say a few words, until all have had an opportunity to toast the Bride and
Groom. Tips: Certain things will help move this along. Have the Best Mantake
the microphone through the crowd to help break the ice. If it appears there are
fewer people interested in speaking, wrap it up with everyone standing and
toasting the bridal couple once more with raised glasses. Now move on with
the program.

Information provided by Bob Kramarik of Bobby K Entertainment, Elmira, NY.

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Copyright Henry Baker, Baker Studios [Link] and DJ Chris Baker at [Link]
26. DJ’s and Bands – Setting UP

Upon your arrival at the reception, identify the location for setting up your
equipment and immediately get your equipment operational. Upon entry to
the building, you might be meeting the room captain. It would be polite and
professional to introduce yourself. At any rate, you should check with the
room captain about the setup of your sound system and where you should plug
in. Hold off on reviewing the agenda until you have your sound system and
equipment set up first.

Conversation with the room captain or hall staff:

My name is (DJ) _______________. I am the DJ and Master of Ceremonies for

the Smith Wedding.

Stick out your hand, shake hands, and give him/her a business card. He/she
will introduce himself/herself. Don’t be afraid to repeat the name again. Make
a note of that name and address him/her by name for the rest of the day.

(room captain’s name) ___________, I am scheduled to be playing at (time)

________. I understand the reception for the Smith wedding is being held
in (the room name) __________________. Do you have a location where you
would like me to set up?

If you are biamping or running a fogger machine, in addition to your sound

system, you might have to be careful about plugging into one circuit box.

I would like to set up my equipment, which will take approximately _______

minutes. I would then like to meet with you to review the agenda for the party.
Where will I be able to find you?

You want to use a written agenda. If you appear to be organized and

experienced, you will gain the confidence and respect of the staff, and be given
free rein to run the program your way.

If the room captain is less experienced, he (or the staff) may immediately defer
to the program you are proposing. If you are dealing with an older person who
appears to be set in his ways; don’t be afraid to tell him how you would like to
run the program, but most importantly, do not be challenging-be polite. You
might have a chance of winning him over if you are pleasant while being
persuasive.

Remember! If you run into any problems they are your problems. Do not
bring any problems to the Bride and Groom. You have to resolve all issues so
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that the Bride and Groom are never made aware of any problems, especially
problems that you might be experiencing with other people. No matter what
happens, act as if things are great, everything is wonderful; it is a beautiful
day.

It would be OK to let the Bride and Groom know that there has been a change
of format. You might say to the Bride and Groom, “At the request of the room
captain, this will be the order of events”. Then simply run through the new
agenda with the couple. If there are any issues regarding the schedule given
by the room captain, simply explain that this is the schedule that the room
captain has given you. Next, very politely call the room captain over, and,
explain that the Bride and Groom would like to review the schedule for the
reception. Don’t be confrontational or make any negative remarks about the
room captain or anyone else. Always be pleasant, polite, and courteous; never
show anger, abruptness or displeasure. You will win most arguments with a
smile and a pleasant manner.

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Copyright Henry Baker, Baker Studios [Link] and DJ Chris Baker at [Link]
27. DJ’s - Instructions to the Wedding Party
for Their Introduction Into the Hall

Setup:

Review Agenda with Room Captain (sometimes referred to as Banquet Coordinator)

Review the format for the presentation to the wedding party with the Room
Captain. Get his approval. Identify when and where the members of the
wedding party will be assembled prior to their introduction into the room.

Check on the Blessing

Meet with the person who is to deliver the blessing. Make sure he/she is
aware that he/she is saying the blessing. Where will this take place? (at the
head table, from the DJ’s booth, etc.)

Check with Best Man on the Toast

Meet with the Best Man. Make sure that he knows he is going to be giving a
toast. Be prepared to offer some suggestions i.e. (Groom)______________ , I am
honored that you have asked me to be your best man. (Bride)________________ , I
think (Groom)______________ is the luckiest man in the world to have you as his
wife. I want to wish both of you the best that life has to offer and may your love
for each other grow as you grow.

Line Up Music
Have your music lined up, preferably two songs for the introduction, plus the
cake- cutting, plus the music for the first dance (If you are going right into the
cake-cutting after the introduction. If you are bringing the Bride and Groom
into a reception line first, then you want a lively tune playing. This will
motivate the crowd to proceed through the reception line more quickly. I
would recommend a big band’s medley or a long version of “Caribbean Queen.”

Paperwork in Order
Have your Wedding Protocol Sheet and the AGENDA ready and placed on
your clipboard. Also put the Wedding Introduction Form under these two
forms.

A copy of this form can be obtained by visiting [Link] A

version is available on this website.

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Copyright Henry Baker, Baker Studios [Link] and DJ Chris Baker at [Link]
28. Reception Lines

The Reception Line is a formality that should not be skipped, and one that is
best held sooner rather than later. In many instances the reception line is
held at the church.

For large wedding parties, you want to minimize the number of people in the
reception line so as to reduce delay. Therefore, the line can be as few people as
the mothers of the Bride and Groom, the Bride and Groom, the Maid of Honor
and the best man. Usually, though, you will see both parents in the reception
line. Only when the parents are divorced do the fathers usually choose to
mingle with the guests instead. Sometimes when the reception lines are held
at the churches and there is a problem with space, you might only see the
Bride and Groom with the Maid of Honor and the best man.

As people come through the reception line, they will often hand the Best Man
an envelope with a wedding gift.

If the reception line is at the hall and the guests are having cocktails in a room
which is detached from the main room, then you might see the reception line
in the hall itself, so that people will go through the line on their way to the
main function room.

You also have the option of having the wedding party at the main entrance to
the function room. As people come into the room, they will go through the
reception line first.

The last option is when guests are already assembled in the main function
room, in which case you might have to introduce the wedding party to the
assembled guests and directly into a reception line. You, as the DJ or the
Band, would find yourself calling guests, by tables, to go through the reception
line. After the reception line, you would then have the following options: cake-
cutting next, then the first dance, followed by the blessing and the toast.

During this time while people are going through the reception line, the
Bridesmaids and ushers might be sitting at the head table. Once everyone
has gone through the reception line, you would then make any
announcements, i.e. introducing grandparents or people who might have
traveled some distance to get to the wedding.

Those announcements might go like this: “Ladies and gentlemen, I would like to
call your attention to a very special person who is with us today, Mrs. Evelyn
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Copyright Henry Baker, Baker Studios [Link] and DJ Chris Baker at [Link]
Moses, our Bride’s grandmother. Evelyn is ninety -years-young and a great
dancer. On the behalf of the Bride and Groom and all of our families, we want
to tell you how happy we are to have you with us today. Eveyln, could you
please stand? Folks, let’s have a big hand for a great lady!”

You might then have the wedding party come out to stand in front of the head
table while you introduce the Bride and Groom for the first dance. Half way
through the dance, you can then invite the wedding party and the parents to
join them on the dance floor. It creates a better appearance if you call the
wedding party out by name, as couples, but be careful to pace the announcing
of the couples to give the photographer a chance to photograph each couple as
they come onto the floor.

Order for the Reception Line:

You will usually see the receiving line set up in the following order:

Parents of the Bride (Whoever is hosting the party should be first.)

Parents of the Groom
Bride and Groom
Maid of Honor and Best Man
Bridesmaids and Ushers (Etiquette indicates the ushers should not be in
the receiving line.)

It would be more comfortable to have the order of the receiving line as

follows:

Mother of the Bride, Mother of the Groom

Father of the Bride, Father of the Groom
Bride and Groom
Maid of Honor and Best Man

Etiquette would dictate the following order: mother of the Bride, her husband,
father of the Groom, mother of the Groom, Bride, Groom, etc.. By pairing the
mothers together and fathers together, the parents can introduce their friends
to each other, and it makes for a friendlier situation.

Using a remote mike you will be announcing the wedding party to the guests
and the reception line. You will need to stay by your console to take care of the
music. After you have introduced everyone, you can arrange the parents so that
both mothers and fathers are standing together.

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Copyright Henry Baker, Baker Studios [Link] and DJ Chris Baker at [Link]
You might handle this by saying the following, (addressing the parents of the
Bride and Groom):

A more comfortable order for the receiving line would be for the Mother of the
Bride and mother of the Groom to be first, and fathers of the Bride and Groom
second; this way it will be easier for you to introduce your friends and family to
each other. Would you like to use this line-up, or would you prefer to be paired
off with your spouses?

Now call the guests by tables.

29. Blessings

The blessing is an important event and should not be arbitrarily skipped. If

you have clergy at the reception, then out of courtesy they should be invited to
say the blessing. However, you should have checked with the Bride and Groom
before the day of their wedding, and you should know if you will be saying the
blessing. If they have someone designated to say the blessing you should know
who that person is. Before the announcement into the hall, you should have
checked with the designated person to make sure they know they will be
saying the blessing and to determine where they will be saying the blessing.

30. Toast

A toast should always be delivered after the blessing and before the meal. It is
traditional, it sets a mood, and it should always be done.

You want to check with both the Best Manand the Maid of Honor before you
introduce the Wedding Party into the hall. Check with the Best Man to make
sure that he knows that he will be delivering the toast. You want to let him
know that he will be introduced right after the blessing and that he should
deliver the toast standing directly behind and to the left of the Groom (if you
have a remote microphone).

You should also check with the maid/matron of honor to see if she will be
delivering a toast. You want to do this even if you were told that she would not
be delivering a toast. Sometimes the Maid of Honor will decide at the last
minute to give a toast and, it is better if you know that in advance. I would not
be as concerned about the positioning of the Maid of Honor for the delivery, but
let her know that you will give her the microphone right after the Best
Mandelivers his toast.

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Copyright Henry Baker, Baker Studios [Link] and DJ Chris Baker at [Link]
If you are coordinating a small wedding with a limited number of guests, and it
is a small gathering with the Bride and Groom being an older couple-i.e. 30’s,
40’s, 50’s. The Best Man(Groom’s son) is very young, then having the Groom’s
son say the toast would be unrealistic. In this case you may have talked with
the Groom and he has told you that there will be no toast, because of the best
man’s age. Should you end it there? No!!! Look at the people in the hall,
introduce yourself to them, and you will spot parents, uncles and aunts. It
would be appropriate to talk with the mother of the Groom or an aunt and tell
them you would like to have an older male offer a toast. Ask if there is
someone she would recommend. She might mention a favorite uncle or a good
friend of the Groom’s, who has been invited. Discreetly talk with this person
and ask if he would like to offer a toast. Right after the blessing make the
announcement and have this person offer the toast. It will be appropriate, and
everyone will appreciate the fact that you did it.

I was asked by a DJ (who bought my video) about a situation where he was told
that the toast was delivered at the wedding rehearsal dinner. Therefore, there
did not have to be any toast at the wedding. Absolutely not! The toast should
always be offered at the reception. It is fine to deliver a toast at the rehearsal
party, but the toast should absolutely be delivered at the reception as well.

When you are introducing the best man, it is always a good idea to interject
some humor to relax the speaker. Don’t be afraid to say that the Best Man has
been practicing all week.

When you announce the Best Man use a leading statement like, “I have the
pleasure of introducing our best man _____________. Please direct your
attention to _____________ as he leads us in a toast to our Bride and
Groom.

31. CUTTING OF THE CAKE

There is usually a cutting-of-the-cake at the reception, but sometimes this is

done with little or no fanfare. In that case, it often happens during the meal,
with no notice or attention being focused on the Bride and Groom. The music
in the background is usually soft. This no-fanfare approach to the cake-cutting
activity is more common at your very formal weddings and is always
coordinated with the DJ or band

However, if this activity is to be done ceremoniously (with fanfare), then you

want to do everything possible to avoid a messy scene and not encourage the
possibility of an inappropriate response (like smashing).

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You can set up the cake with a plate, a knife, two forks, and a napkin. When
you are ready to bring the Bride and Groom to the site for the cake-cutting,
you should mention to them that they should use the forks, as it makes for a
great picture. (You can’t smash someone if your feeding them with a fork.)

Tips:

1. You want to make sure that a knife, napkin, and plate are behind the cake
(forks are a good idea).

2. You want to talk with the Bride and Groom before you start. Let them know
that they will cut the cake, feed each other, give each other a kiss, and that
the Bride will always go first.

3. If you are playing a lyrical version of the “Bride Cuts the Cake,” then you
should let the Bride and Groom know that the lyrics will move quickly.

4. Just before this activity, you may want to make sure that the flowers of the
Bride and Maid of Honor are placed on the table, in front of the cake to dress
up the scene.

5. The Groom will be inclined to step forward with the Bride standing behind
him, but you really want the Bride to be standing in front of the Groom. The
importance should be on photographing the bridal gown rather than the
Groom’s tuxedo.

32. Parents’ Dances

The Father of the Bride and mother of the Groom are usually looking forward to
these dances. However, the Bride and Groom might be a little nervous and ask
you to shorten their dances or you might be requested to combine the dances
into one song.

Remember who is hosting this affair. It’s not a bad idea to let Dad know that
the Bride requested that you cut the dance short. If he has any objection, ask
him how he would like you to handle this and pay attention to the father’s
response. If it appears that he would like to have a full dance with his
daughter, then consider the possibility of allowing him to do so.

If the Bride does not have a father, you might want to think about having the
Bride dance with a Grandfather and /or brothers and /or uncles. Preferably
all of them; it will make for a great scene.

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Copyright Henry Baker, Baker Studios [Link] and DJ Chris Baker at [Link]
It is also appropriate to have a single dance for both the Bride and her father,
along with the Groom and his mother. The Bride and her father would be
announced first. Approximately, half-way through the dance, the Groom and
his mother would be announced, so that both couples would share the floor.
“Unforgettable” by Nat or Natalie (King) Cole or “Through the Years” by Kenny
Rogers are good songs for this occasion.

The DJ should let the photographer and videographer know what the schedule
is for the day, and to give them some advance notice for preparation before the
next event.

The tips that I have given you concerning the dressing of scenes (i.e. putting
flowers in front of the cake for the cake-cutting), are tips that might be
especially helpful at a lower budget wedding, in a smaller reception hall.
Professional photographers should know and be aware of these tips.

Garter and Bouquet

Setup:
1. The DJ should check with the photographer and videographer to make
sure they are ready.
2. Check with the Bride and Groom. (Make sure their parents are also
consulted.)
3. Talk to the ushers to make sure they are prepared and understand their
duties.
4. Get your music ready. (There are a lot of transitions.)

The routine is:

1. Call the single women to the dance floor.

2. Have the Bride throw the bouquet to the single women.
3. Have the Groom remove the garter from the Bride’s leg.
4. Bring the single men onto the dance floor.
5. Have the Groom throw the garter to the men on the floor.
6. Bring the couple together for a photograph and for the start of the next
dance.

34. Last Dance

The Bride and Groom should be sent to change, at approximately 45 minutes

before the end of the night. The last dance will take about three minutes, but
the Bride and Groom’s “good-byes” to their families and friends will easily take
at least ten minutes. Try to complete this scene about five to ten minutes
before the end of the night.
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Copyright Henry Baker, Baker Studios [Link] and DJ Chris Baker at [Link]
To do this, the DJ should call the guests to form a big circle on the dance floor.
Then the DJ will announce the Bride and Groom. They will go directly into the
circle while the DJ plays the song they had selected for their last dance. At the
end of this song, the DJ will segue into an upbeat song “Ain’t No Stopping Us
Now, ” McFadden & Whitehead, while calling for the Bride and Groom to say
“good-bye” to everyone.

Introduce Couple Into the Hall (by the DJ)

“I would like to introduce ____________ and _____________, for their last dance of
the evening. Let’s give them a big hand!”.

This is a song they selected for their going-away. It’s called (title of
song)_______________ and it was selected by (first names)________ and ________
for their last dance.

Break-Off on the Dance Floor and Say “Good-bye” to Friends

At the end of the song it would work to simply do a sign off, so that the Bride
and Groom will naturally move to say “good-bye” to all their friends, but this
format is weaker than what I would propose.

Call to the Bride and Groom!

“At this time, we would like to have our Bride and Groom break off and go
around the circle, thanking their friends and relatives for being with them on
their wedding day, helping to make this the special day that it is.

At this time I would play, “Ain’t No Stopping Us Now,” by McFadden and

Whitehead.

If you think the situation calls for a send-off (where the bridal couple leaves the
circle and exits the building,) then I would play something with punch:

“Ladies and Gentlemen, let’s give our Bride and Groom a big send off.”
Now call for applause while playing “YMCA.”

Sign Off

On the behalf of _________ and __________, (your name), thank you all for
making their wedding reception one that they will always cherish. It’s
been a great day, you are a super group, take care and drive safely!

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Copyright Henry Baker, Baker Studios [Link] and DJ Chris Baker at [Link]
 Toast

Setup for the DJ:

You should have checked with the Best Man to make sure he knows he will be
delivering a toast. This should have happened prior to the introduction of the
wedding party to the guests. You should have also checked with the
maid/matron of honor prior to the announcements to see if she would be
offering a toast to the couple.

You will have everyone stand with the Bride and Groom sitting.

If we could all raise our toast glasses and join our Best Man in a toast to
our Bride and Groom. I would now like to introduce our Best Man
(name)_____________________ who will lead us in a toast to our Bride and
Groom.

It is always good to give the Best Man an example of a toast. This would have been
done at an earlier time. Here is one you could offer:

(Groom)______________ , I am honored that you have asked me to be your

best man. (Bride)________________ , I think (Groom)______________ is the
luckiest man in the world to have you for his wife. I want to wish both of
you the best that life has to offer, and may your love for each other grow
as you grow.

With all toasts, remember the three S’s. Be Short, Be Sweat, Be Seated.

I would always recommend that the best man start by thanking the Groom for
the Honor of being the Best Man. Always then congratulate him on his choice
of a wife and then offer a simple toast.

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Copyright Henry Baker, Baker Studios [Link] and DJ Chris Baker at [Link]
 Recommendations for Music
Can be obtained by visiting [Link] web site.

If you are new to the business as a DJ, Videographer or Photographer, you

might want to consider the purchase of the complete package, “The DJ’s Guide
to Running Weddings”. The cost is $95 and can be obtained by contacting
Chris Baker.

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Copyright Henry Baker, Baker Studios [Link] and DJ Chris Baker at [Link]