Melendres, Mark James I.
BSN-3, Blk 2 Requirement for FINALS First Interview: (4/26/13) My Parents, they will be 25 years this May 21, 2013. This is the first time Ive interviewed my parents regarding marriage. We sometimes talk at home about their teenage years and how they met each other, their love story, but this my most serious talk to them regarding how they reach this long time of being with each other (and I hope and pray that it will continue forever). Interviewee: Roland Melendres Melecita Melendres 1. Suggestions for Successful Marriage? My father asked me jokingly if they really have a successful marriage. My mother answered that they do not have perfect marriage, but they are both happy especially having us children. Well, they suggested that at least you must be happy with the life you chose. You must not only think of yourself now, as verbalized, ipaawahi najud ng kaugalingon kay nagminyo man ka unya nanganak pajud ka. My mother ended it by saying, mag-ampo ka nga lig-onon inyong pamilya sa Gino-o. And as I observed as their child, I would say that theyre never selfish, they are not selfish to each other (they even have their own way of understanding who needs rest and who needs to work) and they are never selfish to us. I guess its their way of showing love. 2. What compromises have they had to make over the years? My father said that he has to reduce his time with his friends and his drinking of alcohol because he already has children and supporting us has always been their responsibility. I have always heard from some of my neighbors and even my mama, that papa was a very bugoy person before and that he seems to be an irresponsible person, and just anywhere he goes, he finds a fight, but now, I can see how he changed. My mother was working before, but after she delivered my eldest sister she stopped. She wanted to return to work but my father told her that who will watch for the baby, who will be left in the house, my father said that he dont want to go home in the house with no one in there. My mother agreed (I know its against the law, but setting aside RA 9262, my mama has no intention of suing my papa anyway) until their children became three, and she never return to work until now. 3. What do they consider the major changes in their lives to have been? First: Children. They say these are the biggest reason why marriages stays strong even with the test of time. Its not easy to take care of your children and marriage and family itself is
never a joke. Next: Living separately from their parents. My mother lived in my Lolos house but then after having children, we moved to a new house, then we moved again when my Lola from my fathers side gave them a lot to where they can build their house so they moved to the house after its finish. Living on their own and with children was a big change and challenge they have encountered. Another: Earning money: It is never easy earning money when you already have your own family compared before where you only need to use money for yourself. Second Interview: (4/28/13) My aunt and her husband. They are married last and they are at their 26 years of marriage now (same, I hope and pray it will last). Interviewee: Cresensciano Medina Judith Medina 1. Suggestions for Successful Marriage? My tiya said that you should love your husband and children first before yourself. My tiyo laughed and said that you should always sleep with your wife every night. They said that you should trust one another and that there should be an equal division of labor. 2. What compromises have they had to make over the years? My tiyo said that he has to also reduce his leisure time and time with barkada because he needs to work for his family. My tiya said that she also has to work for her family and set aside her friends for other times. She believed that you should be willing to give up anything for the sake of your family. 3. What do they consider the major changes in their lives to have been? My tiyo said that having to live far from your family. He is originally from Toledo, but they settled here in Consolacion with their family. Children as well are major change that they have face. Especially when their children get to be sick or hospitalized before, they have to give up many things and change many plans. Also, working changes because you now work for the family and not for yourself. Change in the priority in life, its always the children now, next the partner, then yourself. *** Both my parents and my Tiya and Tiyo admitted that even if there are major changes on the way, they are glad to have each other as companion.
