Divided We Stand

Published on by Bella Rum26 Comments

Hi. I don’t know why I can’t seem to post more than once or twice a month. I blame it on monotonous days, blah weather and being isolated from anything mildly interesting.

H will get his second vaccine shot tomorrow. I’m not sure why the V.A. made his appointment 21 days after his first shot, and Walgreens made mine 28 days later. We both got Pfizer.

H’s brother had a stroke. H is not allowed to visit him because of COVID-19. Only one person can see him each day so his three daughters rotate visits. His speech, right side, memory and vision have been affected. I think I told you a few months ago that his wife asked him to leave, and he moved in with his youngest daughter, Cathy, for a short time. Eventually his wife called and cried and begged him to return. He did. They’ve been married for 60 some years. She has her own problems and cannot understand why he can’t come home, but she’s not capable of caring for him. It’s very stressful for their daughters.

I know I’ve mentioned somewhere along the way that many years ago, after their mother died, H and his brother had a break in their relationship. They healed it a long time ago, and over the past year they’ve talked more often than ever. This was a hard week for H, and I know it was horrible for his brother and his daughters. They are so devoted to him. He will have to go to rehab now. I have no idea how long that could last.

I have done one interesting thing recently. I’m watching the CNN series Lincoln: Divided We Stand. It’s very good if you enjoy history, and I do. If you have a chance and the time, I recommend it.

One interesting note: H’s niece, Cathy, told a nurse that her dad had the stroke the day after he got his vaccine (Moderna). The nurse told her that there was no connection. Cathy later told his doctor and he said, “Hmm. He’s my second patient this week who had a stroke after receiving his vaccine.” I don’t know what to say about that. I haven’t heard anything on the news.

A Wintry Mix

Published on by Bella Rum20 Comments

Our Nellie Stevens holly

We had cold, wet, icy, drab weather for a couple of weeks, but suddenly, as it eventually does, the sun reappeared. The temps rose into the fifties, and life is good. I talked to my niece in Texas last week. She was alone and without power for days. The temperature inside the house was very cold. Her husband was out of town on business. She is very happy to that he’s home now, and she has power again. I feel so terrible for what people have had to endure.

This one was out of our bedroom window in the front of the house.

The pasture was pretty.

I can’t believe how many people have been affected by these storms. Compared to others, I feel like we were in a pile-up on the Interstate, but came out unscathed. Spring is on the way. Spring is a great thing, isn’t it? It’s dependable, too. Like the sun, it always returns.

Yesterday, we pruned the crepe myrtle in the backyard. That’s the first thing we’ve done in the yard since last fall. I can’t wait for spring.

H got his first shot of vaccine yesterday at the VA and guess what? I got mine this morning at Walgreens. I can hardly believe it. I got up early on Tuesday morning and thought I’d try again to get an appointment. I went on the Walgreens site. I could see that they were taking appointments, but the site was slow (very slow). Every time I thought I I had it, it would say “Try again later.” H got on his computer and we sat here with dueling computers: going on the site, getting kicked off, trying again, etc. H finally got through on his computer and made a 9:15 appointment for this morning. I was the first appointment. H experienced a little soreness at the site of injection this morning. Other than that, we’ve had no symptoms. They say the second shot seems to cause symptoms more frequently than the first.

Aunt Ruby is still refusing to get the vaccine after someone told her that his second shot “just about killed him.” That was enough to scare her, and she’s still balking at getting it. She called me today to find out how I was feeling after getting it. I told her that H and I were fine, and I asked her for the second time to reconsider. I don’t know why people tell older people things like that. When my father needed knee replacements, someone told him not to do it, and then described in horrible detail how painful and lengthy the recovery was. There was nothing my brother or I could say to get him to reconsider. He later regretted it. Dad’s life and my life would have been very different if he’d gotten those knees fixed up. Quality of life is everything as you get older.

Hope you guys are all hanging in there.

If it Doesn’t Make Sense…

Published on by Bella Rum16 Comments

It snowed on the last two weekends. It’s been beautiful, but the ice came on Saturday, and the power went out on Saturday evening. We always play cards when the power goes out. He won. When the house started to cool down, we turned the fireplace on. I couldn’t believe how toasty it was in here. The heavy ice did some damage to some of our shrubs, but we’ll have to wait till the sun comes out to see if they spring back. Anyway, that’s enough now. I’m ready for spring.

I’ve tried to get an appointment for the vaccine on the CVS, Walgreens and Publix sites. No luck. They ask for my info, but they kicked me out when I entered my zip code. Nothing available here. I managed to get on the county list, but they were like, don’t call us, we’ll call you. Like so many places, there’s high demand and not enough vaccine. That was a couple of weeks ago.

H called the V.A. He had to leave a message. About a week and a half later, they called him back and gave him an appointment for February 24. He will get the Pfizer vaccine. Yippee! His second shot is scheduled for March 17.

Oh, my. I am getting old. My hearing is sort of there and then not so much. I catch most everything, but occasionally my brain makes up words that I miss. I eventually realize something is wrong when it just doesn’t make sense. I was watching Wolf Blitzer last week when he said, “The House of Pizza managers are suing Donald Trump for incitement.” It didn’t make sense. I knew that couldn’t be right so I hit rewind and listened again. Nope. It was right. The House of Pizza managers were suing Donald Trump for incitement. Granted, this seemed ridiculous, but that didn’t stop me. When H came back, I told him that I’d heard that the House of Pizza managers were suing Trump. He looked at me like I was nuts. But I had proof. I hit rewind. H listened and then started laughing, like belly rolling on the floor kind of laughing. When he got control of himself he said, “Not The House of Pizza managers. The House impeachment managers.” What can I say? Lizard people exist and Hillary Clinton has been cloned five times. Makes almost perfect sense that a pizza place could sue Trump. Right? I almost wonder why it hasn’t happened by now.

Oh, I almost forgot. I dreamed that Rosie O’Donnell introduced me to her boyfriend. That’s right. Boyfriend. He was a little bitty man, and he was a doctor. Being married to a doctor could come in handy. Or a carpenter. That would be awesome. I’d have built-in bookcases in every room, including the bathrooms.

When Will this End

Published on by Bella Rum10 Comments

I’ve tried over and over again to write a post since my last one. I got nothing. We do nothing, go nowhere, and see no one. I’m pretty done with this Covid thing. How about you? Yet it continues. I talk to people on the phone, still go to the grocery store once a week and to the hospital to get my lab once a month. That’s it. And the last time we cut my hair, it didn’t end so well. I saw a woman with a great haircut at the hospital the other day and wanted to grab her and ask for her hairdresser, but she scooted by too fast.

My bestie got her first vaccine shot. That’s something to be thankful for. H’s cousin could get hers because she’s a volunteer at the hospital, but she’s had breast cancer twice and now has an infection at the radiation site, so they won’t give it to her until she heals. It does not want to heal. My niece will be able to get it soon through her company. H is going to call the V.A. and see what’s happening there.

More good news: I changed my primary care doc to H’s. He likes her. I’ve met her a couple of times, and she has a much better bedside manner than my previous one. Mine never looked at me the entire time. She kept her eyes on the computer. H’s doctor does not accept new patients, but he asked her, and she said she would accept me because I was a relative.

I cannot wait for spring. It’s raining and cold and dark. I don’t usually mind any of that, but I want to see people. I miss patio sitting and visiting with faces that I long to see… in person. H misses going to restaurants. We both miss our peeps, especially the grands. Still we are lucky. No jobs in jeopardy, our income continues to show up in our bank account, and we are healthy, though one of us may hit the other in the head with a hammer at any time. That’s a joke. Sorta.

We continue to assess whether we should do pick-up grocery shopping. I think that’s coming soon with this new, more transmittable variant on the horizon.

Hope you guys are all doing well. Honestly, we are doing better than this sounds, but you know, what’s the point of having a blog if you can’t gripe on a bad day?

If I Wrote a Holiday Letter…

Published on by Bella Rum13 Comments

2020 Highlights

  • After losing quite a bit of weight last year, I lost more this year.
  • I gained 3 pounds in the past week.
  • With no clairvoyant abilities whatsoever, I bought several loungy-type ensembles on great deals just before COVID really got rolling. Then I lived in them for ten months – braless.
  • Saved lots of money on bras.
  • From late February, I went to the grocery store only during senior hour – usually on Mondays.
  • We would like to brag that – unless I’m forgetting something – we only made one trip to the emergency room this year for what everyone in our family now calls “the incident when H almost lost his arm.”
  • Relandscaped the front yard.
  • Sat in the backyard… a lot. So grateful for nature.
  • Had numerous virtual doctor visits. So grateful for technology.
  • Saw my brother once. Love him to pieces.
  • Saw H’s cousin once, the last day before we started isolating. Miss her. Miss everyone. Almost everyone. ;)
  • Saw my sweet grands three times – always wearing masks (heartache).
  • Saw a lot of H. Don’t think anyone else could stand to isolate with me.
  • Memo to self: Be nice to H for the rest of my life.
  • Watched some good movies.
  • Watched some really bad movies.
  • Tried some new recipes.
  • Read a lot of books.
  • Took lots of walks with H.
  • Did a lot of shopping online.
  • Talked to lots and lots of loved ones on the phone. Some I hadn’t contacted or heard from in a long time. It was kind of wonderful.

You get the point. What did we do this year? The short answer is isolate. I hope you guys all had a lovely holiday, and that the New Year brings you good health and sweet relationships with those you love. Be safe, and let’s look forward with hope to 2021. Happy New Year!!!

Groceries, The Neighborhood, Hard News

Published on by Bella Rum12 Comments

Is Publix in your area? We didn’t always have one. About five or six years ago, they came to town. When they first opened, I checked them out. Once isn’t enough to really assess a store, but I got the feeling they were a little pricier. Recently, H has gotten the bug to check them out. We went last week. I only bought a few things, so I don’t know, but the aisles are twice as wide as other stores, a woman offers you a clean cart when you enter the store, and there were only one or two other shoppers there. It was early, but we always shop early. I don’t know that I’d shop there every week, but I am going back next week to get the few things I still need for Christmas dinner because I think there will be fewer shoppers. For the time being, that’s more important to me than saving.

I know I’ve mentioned this a few times over the past couple of years, but I think it’s finally happening for real. The house next door is officially for sale. It’s been vacant for the nearly six years that we’ve lived here. The daughter of the previous owner and her husband – who are as old as we are – live in the neighborhood. They’ve told us several times over the past couple of years that they were putting it on the market, but they never did. The sign, which must mean it’s real, is in the yard. They had an open house last weekend. Lucky for them it didn’t rain, but it has rained for the past two days. Their backyard was a swamp yesterday and Tuesday. I’ll try to take a photo the next time it rains.

We had a financial advisor a few years ago. We gave him some money to invest. He did okay, but he had his eye on our 401K. He kept pushing us to roll it over. He was young, good-looking and too slick by half. I’m sure you’ve seen him selling snake oil off the back of a coach on Gunsmoke. Let’s just say we didn’t bond with him. We soon found someone else. Mary. She is terrific, and we are comfortable with her. We’re on the same page, and we’re pleased with the results. She is interested in our goals and needs.

A representative from her office called yesterday and started with, “I have some hard news to tell you.” Words you never want to hear from or about your financial advisor. H and I looked at each other: both of us waiting with bated breath to hear that all our money was gone. :/ But it truly was horrible news. Mary’s sixteen-year-old daughter had died from an accidental overdose. We’ve been with Mary for about eighteen months, and during that time she has lost a brother she was very close to and now her daughter. I can hardly believe this. She won’t be back at work for a few weeks, and they wanted us to know who to call during that time if we had any questions about our account. I don’t know what to say. Life can be so harsh. To be sure, it is other things, too, better things, but sometimes it is one harsh ride.

How’s Your DNA

Published on by Bella Rum10 Comments


We had a dusting a few days ago! Not much to it, but very pretty

I’ve been very bad about keeping in touch with people. Yesterday, four people called. I felt guilty about not calling them more often, but I’m promising myself that I will do better. This morning, we called H’s cousin, Bernice, who is the sweetest person I’ve ever met. Most of H’s relatives on his father’s side are kind, even tempered people. They are also the kind of people you want in an emergency – levelheaded and calm. On the other hand, half the people in my family would pull the ripcord before the plane even left the ground. We are an impatient lot.

Someone I hadn’t seen in a long time called me a few days ago. We started talking about Covid. As serious as a heart attack, she told me that the vaccine is a vehicle to implant chips in all of us so the government can track us. In addition, it will change the DNA of children. Honestly. I can’t believe I know someone on this planet who believes that. Nowadays, I try to avoid politics when talking to people, but… I told her that was not true. I asked her where she heard it. She said, “Someone told me.” I asked, “Where did they hear it?” She said, “I don’t know, the news I guess.” I told her they probably got it from FB: the Wild West of crazy conspiracy theories. I told her that she already had a tracking device with her at all times, her phone. :) I suggested that she might feel a little better if she checked out the CDC site which addresses the DNA question, but somehow I don’t think the CDC is where she likes to get her news. If anyone is interested, they are welcome to track me from my bedroom, to my family room, to my laundry room, to my kitchen where I will be sleeping, reading or watching a movie, doing laundry or cooking dinner until this pandemic is over.

Except for a package that hasn’t arrived and one stocking stuffer that I will get at the grocery store, I’ve finished my Christmas shopping. That is a relief. I did most of it online. We only go out once a week. My Christmas cards have all been mailed. I don’t send that many anymore, but I still like to stay in touch with a few older people. LOL It’s getting harder and harder to find people older than I am.

Stay safe out there, and keep an eye on that DNA! Someone keeps trying to change it.

What’s so Special about Number 3

Published on by Bella Rum12 Comments

I’m still here. Real life took over for awhile – a little unhappiness which I can’t write about here. I was not in the mood to blog. As they say, I had to process. Still processing. Some of us need more time than others to get on board. I’m slow.

We started trying to get it repaired in late October. No problem. We bought the stove last year with a warranty that covered everything. Right? It was an expensive repair. One part of the part was $600. When we first talked to them in October, they said someone would call us from the repair place soon. We never got a call. We called Lowe’s again, and they had coded it incorrectly. They tried again and we waited again. Nothing happened. We called back. They said they would try a different repair place that was in NC. Okay. We waited for a call from the repair place. No call. We called Lowe’s back, and they said they would make sure we got a call from the NC repair place. We finally got a call from them, and they said they would be here in two days. They never showed up and never called and would not return our calls. We called Lowe’s again and raised a little hell. The guy was very nice but blamed COVID. I told him that I could understand how COVID could impact the delivery of the part but not someone refusing to return our repeated calls. He agreed and swore that we would get a call from the NC repair guy. We did. The repair guy said that Lowe’s was sending him the part and he would be here between three and four o’clock on Thursday, and would call us ten minutes before his arrival. OKAY!!!

I can update about what has turned into a fiasco: the broken range saga. In my last post, I told you about my broken range. One side of the numbered panel where you change the temperature would not work correctly, mainly the number 3. The stove would automatically start with the temp of 350, so you could get 350 easily, but it was hard to change it to any other temp in the 300s… if that makes sense. We could get it to change, but only by pressing really hard and in just the right way on the 3. It’s a very sensitive 3 or maybe I should say insensitive. For a couple of days in October, we couldn’t get the 3 to work at all. The repair guy said it would eventually break completely and thoroughly.

He did show up on Thursday, but he arrived at one o’clock and did not call before he arrived. No problem. We were here. We were happy to see him. He went into the kitchen for a couple of minutes, and then straight back out to his truck to call Lowe’s. Lowe’s had only sent him one part of the part. He left, saying that he would let us know something when he knew something.

On Friday, Lowe’s called. They said they would like to cut us a check for the entire price of the range, and we could keep the range. That was a deal we could agree with. So we now have a range with an insensitive number 3 that could work for five years or break on Easter morning just as I’m putting the Turkey in the oven. Life on the edge is exciting.

It was a lot of aggravation, but I’m glad they finally made good on it. When COVID has been blunted, I will decide what I want to do about a stove, but I can tell you that owning a stove with an insensitive 3 is a lot more palatable when you don’t have to pay for it.

Blue Moon Restlessness

Published on by Bella Rum13 Comments

I don’t have much to say because not much happens around here. Fall is coming to an end soon, and I hate that. It’s been dark and dreary all day. All the little lamps are burning, but it’s still dark in here. I look out the kitchen window and see fallen leaves on the table where we sat all summer long. Gold and brown leaves cover the patio and yard. The horses wore their blanket coats this morning, and appreciated them I imagine. This time of year is always bittersweet, but especially this year.

I woke at 2:30 on the morning that we had to fall back, and stayed awake for hours: tossing and turning, looking at the ceiling, plumping my pillow, and all the while plagued with ominous thoughts. Did you see that blue moon? Nothing like a full moon coinciding with the end of daylight saving time to screw up your sleep and stir up your worries, not to mention that Mercury is in retrograde through November 3. That’s right. Mercury will be in retrograde on election day.

Also… my fancy, new range wet the bed. The number 3 doesn’t work on the temperature panel. When you turn it on, it automatically goes to 350, but you cannot change it to 325 or 375 or 3 anything. You are married to 350. But you can change it to the 400s and 500s and so on. Those of you who’ve read this and my other blogs know that my appliances and AC and devices break when Mercury is in retrograde – usually in threes. It’s a bad habit. Thankfully the AC repair is holding, and their coming on Tuesday to repair the range. These are only small things. They are nothing. I wish it was as easy as a phone call to repair other things that matter so much more.

As for tomorrow night, I will watch until I fall asleep, which will be early, and H will watch until he falls asleep, which will be later. If by chance it’s an insomnia night for me, I will probably watch more in the middle of the night… if I can take it.

Day-Tripping, Trump Country, Six-Month Checkup

Published on by Bella Rum11 Comments

On Friday morning, Alexa told us it was going to be a gorgeous day. In a rare spontaneous move, we threw some tuna salad that was in the fridge, some cheese and crackers, a banana, a couple of clementines and some water in the cooler, and headed for the Blue Ridge Pkwy. It was so beautiful, and we came in contact with no one. We saw people at the overlooks, but everyone kept their distance. It felt liberating and expansive after being in the house and backyard for so many months. I had one of those old, red & white checkered tablecloths in the car. For lunch, we stopped at a place that had picnic tables. Really fun day. Good for the spirit. We can sure use those nowadays.

Those big dark spots on the valley are shadows from the clouds.

I am living in Trump country, y’all. There are signs everywhere. I’ve seen nary a one for Biden, but you couldn’t throw a rock without hitting a Trump sign. Even in our tiny community, I’ve seen at least six or seven Trump signs between my house and the entrance to the neighborhood. I haven’t even driven down to the back part of the neighborhood. Maybe that’s where they keep all the Biden signs. ;) I’ll be so glad when this election is over. One week left. How long do you think it will take to declare a winner? I hope it isn’t a close election, but I’m steeling myself to be surprised by nothing.

H’s arm has healed nicely, but he has one of those really impressive action movie star scars. He looks like a badass instead of someone who should have attached his brush hog axe more securely to the garage wall.

Yesterday, I had my virtual six-month check up with my PC doc. It started out with the usual stuff. Before the appointment, I weighed, checked my BP, heart rate and oxygen so I could give her all of that info. Then she started asking me the normal Medicare questions. Can you go up a flight of stairs, do you have any safety equipment in your home, have you had any recent falls, and so forth and so on. Then she started a cognitive test. I wasn’t expecting that. I think the nurse gave me one the last time I actually went into the office, which was over a year ago, but I can’t remember. LOL I guess this will be part of my checkup from now on. H asked his doctor why she didn’t do this, and she said she could tell from talking to a person if they were having any serious issues. Different doctor, different approach. I’ve had a couple of those tests for various reasons (for insurance, etc.) So far so good, but it’s never at the top of my fun-things-to-do list.

“What year is it?” Who the hell knows? I’m on COVID time.