{"@attributes":{"version":"2.0"},"channel":{"title":"Vatican Cameos.","link":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/","description":"Vatican Cameos. - LiveJournal.com","lastBuildDate":"Thu, 20 Sep 2012 02:46:08 GMT","generator":"LiveJournal \/ LiveJournal.com","copyright":"NOINDEX","image":{"url":"https:\/\/l-userpic.livejournal.com\/118272583\/12456087","title":"Vatican Cameos.","link":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/","width":"100","height":"100"},"item":[{"guid":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/80408.html","pubDate":"Thu, 20 Sep 2012 02:46:08 GMT","author":"wameron","link":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/80408.html","description":"
Character's Full Name: Jenna Elizabeth Walker
Date: 9\/19\/12
<\/div>
Name origin: Her mother's name is Elizabeth.<\/div>
Nickname, if any: Her parents called her Jay. She also responds to Jenny. Her friends from school gave it to her when she was young.<\/div>
Does s\/he like the nickname? At first, she didn't like Jenny. She wishes people would call her by her given name, but she hardly ever says anything about being called Jenny.<\/div>
Birth date: April 23, 1990<\/div>
Place of birth: Miami<\/div>
Ethnic background: She's American. Her great great great grandparents moved to New York from Germany a long time ago.<\/div>
Religion: She's agnostic, from personal choices. But her family are devout Christians.<\/div>
Degree of religious practice (e.g. orthodox, casual, lapsed): Jenna's very casual when it comes to religion.<\/div>
Current address: It's complicated, but she currently lives in California outside of LA.<\/div>
Does s\/he rent or own? She was renting out a place with a few roommates but things happened.<\/div>
Brief description of home (apartment, house, etc.): They were living in a nice big house.<\/div>
Does s\/he live with anyone? She lived with four other girls.<\/div>
Describe the area in which s\/he lives  (city, town, rural, other): They lived on the edge of the city in a quiet suburb.<\/div>
Is this his\/her ideal home and location? If not, what would s\/he prefer? Not at all. Jenna has always lived in quiet places her whole life, and she longs to live in the busy bustling city.<\/div>
Home decor: Inexpensive, Carefully planned, Comfortable. Her room is sometimes quite cluttered and a bit messy.<\/div>
Does s\/he drive? Yes.
Own a car? (Make, model, color, age, etc.): She has only recently purchased a car. It's a black 2007 Chevy Aveo.<\/div>
Pets?  (If so, what kind\/how many\/names?) She doesn't have any, but she's always had a soft spot for cats.<\/div>
If so, how important are they? How well are they treated? N\/A<\/div>
Current occupation (include length of time, location, job title): She works behind a desk for an insurance agency in the city. She's been working there for a year now.<\/div>
Job satisfaction (happy, discontent, ambivalent, ambitious...): She hates working where she does, but she's content with working there for the time being.<\/div>
Income: She makes just a little less than $50,000 a year.<\/div>
Sexuality (e.g. straight, gay, bisexual, asexual, uncertain…): Straight.<\/div>
Marital status: Single, never been married.<\/div>
If married or currently romantically involved, with whom, and for how long? List any significant previous romantic partners: She dated a guy, Branden Ackerman, for three years in high school and after graduation until they broke up when she was 20. But he's been her only significant romantic relationship.<\/div>
For current spouse\/partner, what does the character call him\/her (pet names, nicknames, etc.)? <\/div>
How did they meet? She met Branden toward the end of their sophomore year in high school.<\/div>
Any children (include names, ages, other parent if different from any current partner): N\/A<\/div>
Describe his\/her relationship with children (if any)? <\/div>

PHYSICAL APPEARANCE<\/b><\/div>
Height: 5' 5"
Weight: About 120
Body type (thin, athletic, <\/div>
overweight, curvy, muscular, etc.) Jenna has always been thin. She was athletic in high school but has lost most of the muscle she gained back then.<\/div>
Eye color: Brown
Need glasses\/contacts\/hearing aid? None.
Skin tone (pale, ivory, tan, olive, <\/div>
ruddy, brown, etc.): She has olive skin.<\/div>
Face shape (round, oval, chubby, thin, long, square, heart-shaped, etc.): Her face was rounder when she was younger and in high school, but it's thinned out as she's gotten older, mainly due to stress and lack of a healthy diet.<\/div>
Any prominent features, freckles\/moles\/scars\/tattoos or other distinguishing marks: She has light freckles across her nose and cheeks, but nothing too noticeable.<\/div>
Whom does s\/he most look like (e.g. famous person or relative)? (Her faceclaim is Emma Watson) People have always said she looks like a young Jennifer Aniston. Also, she looks just like her mother.<\/div>
General health (good, excellent, poor...)? Good, but it could be better.<\/div>
Any current health problems or chronic conditions? Nope.<\/div>
How does s\/he dress? She typically wears dark clothing. Dark jeans and a dark t-shirt with her favorite old leather jacket she's had for years. She also almost always has her sunglasses with her. However, she has been known to dress quite nicely from time to time if she needs to.<\/div>
Price: Average to Cheap. She likes to shop in thrift shops a lot.<\/div>
Style: She's mostly casual, but her roommates try to help her be trendy.               <\/div>
Why does she dress in the above manner (e.g. to be noticed)? She struggled with herself in high school, and now that she takes care of herself she wants to wear what she feels most comfortable in.<\/div>
Any special jewelry? (If so, why is it special?) She has a pair of stud earrings her mother gave to her for her 16th birthday that she wears everyday. She also owns a simple heart necklace that she wears everyday as well.
What about accessories? Other than the earring, the necklace, and her sunglasses, nothing.
Grooming: She tries to keep herself looking nice and presentable. Average.<\/div>
If other than average, why?<\/div>
Describe hairstyle  (long, short, crewcut, locs, bangs, side-part etc.): Jenna's always had her hair shorter growing up, but now that she's been on her own for the last few years she's let it grow out long. She's got side bangs.<\/div>
Natural hair texture  (smooth, wavy, curly, etc.): She had quite curly hair when she was little, but she grew out of it.
Current hair texture (if different): Wavy.<\/div>
Natural hair color: Light brown.
Current hair color (if different): Dark brown, from dying it and it has gotten darker as she's aged.<\/div>

SPEECH AND LANGUAGE\/COMMUNICATION<\/b><\/div>
Pace of speech (fast, average, slow?): Average, but she can also speak quickly, something she learned from working at the insurance agency.
Voice tone (shrill, high, average, deep, squeaky, hoarse, <\/div>
harsh, authoritative, cultured, etc.): Jenna's got a pleasant, soft voice. It usually puts people at ease when she speaks calmly.<\/div>
Accent\/dialect, if any: Average American accent.
Any favorite\/habitual words\/phrases?
Curse words? She loves the F word.<\/div>
Describe general vocabulary or speech pattern (e.g. educated, precise, pretentious, average, uneducated, vulgar…) Generally average vocabulary, but she can get quite vulgar if she feels like it.<\/div>
Mannerisms\/demeanor? Jenna can sometimes have a shy demeanor if she's tired or uncomfortable, but most of the time she can be outgoing. Cool\/confident. Nervous\/shy<\/div>
Typical posture: Stands straight but not stiffly. Average, varies with mood<\/div>
Gestures: When she is excited, Jenna makes huge wild gestures. When she is calm, she gestures but not as much as when excited.<\/div>
Common\/habitual gestures (e.g. nail-biting, hair patting, drumming fingers, clenched fists, hands in pockets, etc.): She used to bite her nails and does very rarely anymore. She taps her foot and shakes her leg when nervous. She also bites at the top layer of skin on the inside of her bottom lip when she's bored. Most of the time her hands are in her jeans pockets.<\/div>

EVERYDAY BEHAVIOR \/ HABITS<\/b><\/div>
Finances: (prudent\/cautious, some debt, lives paycheck to paycheck, deep in debt, criminal activity, etc.): She used to struggle with saving money when she first had a job, but she's been able to control her spending and is rather frugal now.<\/div>
Personal Habits: Smoking, Drinking, Drugs, Gambling, etc.? She smokes cigarettes occasionally, along with a few drinks from time to time. One is calm, she gestures but not as much as when excited.<\/div>
Common\/habitual gestures (e.g. nail-biting, hair patting, drumming fingers, clenched fists, hands in pockets, etc.): She used to bite her nails and does very rarely anymore. She taps her foot and shakes her leg when nervous. She also bites at the top layer of skin on the inside of her bottom lip when she's bored. Most of the time her hands are in her jeans pockets.<\/div>

EVERYDAY BEHAVIOR \/ HABITS<\/b><\/div>
Finances: (prudent\/cautious, some debt, lives paycheck to paycheck, deep in debt, criminal activity, etc.): She used to struggle with saving money when she first had a job, but she's been able to control her spending and is rather frugal now.<\/div>
Personal Habitof her roommates smokes pot and she will join her every now and then when she's feeling stressed.
Are any of these addictions? Nope. She has always had great control over the things she indulges in.
Morning Routine: Nothing too special. She usually showers when she first gets up, then has some breakfast and is off to work for the day. If she gets up early enough, she tries to go running but it doesn't happen too often.
Describe the character's morning rituals. Jenna has never been able to speak in the morning until she's had a chance to go pee and have a drink of water. That's pretty much the only thing she will always do on a daily basis.
Who else is sleeping in the same bed? Usually no one else. But her roommates have been known to drunkenly stumble into her room in the middle of the night.
What time does he\/she wake up? She has to leave the house by 7:30 to get to work on time, so she typically wakes up at about 6 to give herself enough time to get ready.
Is he\/she cheerful in the morning? She's not cheerful, but she's not grumpy. She's very quiet in the mornings.
What does he\/she do during breakfast-read, watch tv, feed <\/div>
kids, etc. Jenna will usually find a magazine or the newspaper to read while she prepares and eats her food.<\/div>
Afternoon\/Workday:  
Does s\/he work outside the home? Yes.
How does he\/she get there? She drives.
Is s\/he good at this job? She's decent enough for them to have kept her for the last year.<\/div>
What if anything would he\/she rather be doing? Jenna wants to be an actress.
How long and hard is the work day? She work 8-4:30 on weekdays, but her job hasn't been difficult since she started.
If the job isn’t outside the <\/div>
home, what does a typical afternoon consist of?<\/div>
Dinner:  
Does s\/he eat at home or go out a lot? Her roommates try to cook every night, but they all have jobs and social lives so sometimes Jenna goes out by herself. She usually eats out once a week.
What is\/are his or her favorite restaurant(s)? She loves anywhere that serves good chicken.
Who cooks at home?  None of them are very talented cooks, but they all try to take turns on who cooks the dinners.<\/div>
Does s\/he eat alone? She usually does, yes.<\/div>
Evening:  
What does your character do on a typical evening? She'll get home from work around 5:30 every day. Most nights she'll come home, check to see if it's her night to cook or if someone else has cooked, and depending on that either stay out in the kitchen to make dinner or she will go back to her bedroom. She has a TV and a DVD player set up in her room, so a lot of the time she'll watch old movies and fall asleep around 10pm every night.
Where? At the house where she lives.
With whom? Herself or her roommates.
How much does he\/she enjoy it? She can get lonely from time to time, but she just grins and bears it.<\/div>
What is the ideal evening for him or her? Going out for drinks after work with her roommates or by herself. Any time she gets to spend in the city is perfect for her.<\/div>
Sleep Habits:  
Fall asleep easily, or an insomniac? Jenna's never been able to fall asleep unless there is some sort of soft noise around her, which is why she falls asleep watching movies or TV.
Any recurring dreams? When she was 11 she decided she wanted to be an actress, and ever since then she has had a recurring dream of being at a premiere for a big movie she just filmed. She usually wakes up crying.
Sleep soundly, or toss & turn? It depends, really. But she's mostly a sound sleeper.<\/div>
Any special talents? She's a wonderful singer, but shrself or her roommates.
How much does he\/she enjoy it? She can get lonely from time to time, but she just grins and bears it.<\/div>
What is the ideal evening for him or her? Going out for drinks after work with her roommates or by herself. Any time she gets to spend in the city is perfect for her.<\/div>
Sleep Habits:  
Fall asleep easily, or an insomniac? Jenna's never been able to fall asleep unless there is some sort of soft noise around her, which is why she falls asleep watching movies or TV.
Any recurring dreams? When she was 11 she decided she wanted to be an actress, and ever since then she has had a recurring dream of being at a premiere for a big movie se doesn't sing often enough for people to know it.
Skills? She's always been able to memorize lines from movies or songs quickly. Another reason she thinks being an actress would be a smart choice for her.<\/div>
What is s\/he particularly unskilled at? She's never been too good when it comes to cooking. And she's always been a bit bad at typical homely things.<\/div>
Any hobbies (sports, games, arts, collecting, etc.)? <\/div>

FAMILY OF ORIGIN<\/b><\/div>
Mother's name (include maiden name if known\/applicable): Elizabeth Thompson<\/div>
Current status: Living   (If alive, enter age: 40)<\/div>
Mother’s occupation, if any: School teacher.<\/div>
Describe the mother’s relationship with character: Elizabeth tries to call Jenna often to check up on her, but Jenna hardly answers. She loves her mom, but she likes to keep her distance.<\/div>
Father's name: Charles Walker<\/div>
Current status: Living (If alive, enter age: 45 )<\/div>
Father’s occupation, if any: Lawyer.<\/div>
Describe the father’s relationship with character: Jenna hasn't spoken to her father in nearly ten years.
Any step-parents, foster parents, or birth parents (if not same as above): <\/div>
(If s\/he is adopted, does s\/he know? If not, why?)<\/div>
Sibling(s) (include age and birth order relative to main character): Jenna is an only child, but her parents got a divorce when she was very little. They both have remarried or have new partners, and so Jenna has several step-siblings.<\/div>
Relationship(s) with character: Jenna doesn't talk to any of her step-siblings, and they never make any effort to reach out to her.<\/div>
Nieces\/Nephews: None.
In-Laws, if any: N\/A<\/div>
Other than the above, who else in the story is part of his\/her extended family (e.g.  cousins, etc.)? No one.<\/div>

THE PAST<\/b><\/div>
Home town (if different from current home): Miami, Florida<\/div>
Was his\/her childhood happy? The first five or six years of her life were great. She lived in Florida with her parents, but then they got a divorce and she moved around a lot with her mother after that. 
Does the character remember it accurately? More than she would like to admit, yes.<\/div>
Earliest memory: Jenna can remember one day when she was only four years old walking into her parent's room. Her mother had gone out shopping for the day, leaving Jenna in the care of her father Charles. When she wandered into the room, she saw her father on the bed with another woman who was not her mom. At the time, Jenna didn't know any better and didn't understand what was going on so she walked away. But now she realizes that her father had been having an affair while her mother was out.<\/div>
Happiest memory: <\/div>
Saddest memory: <\/div>
How much school did s\/he attend, if any? She completed all of the schooling that was required of her, and graduated high school. She's waiting to start college though.
Did\/does s\/he like school? Why or why not? She didn't hate it, but she struggled with herself a lot growing up and being in public school did not make anything easier for her.<\/div>
Most significant childhood event: Her parents getting a divorce, because it changed her whole life.<\/div>
Other significant childhood events: Leaving Florida with her mom.<\/div>
Significant past jobs: Other than the insurance job right now, she's only ever worked at a grocery store.<\/div>
Police record (explain any convictions, sentence served, where\/when): None.<\/div>
First crush\/romantic love? Her first crush was a little boy named Jeremy when they were in the third grade. Her first romantic love with Branden Ackerman in high school.<\/div>
What was his\/her first sexual experience? Is it a positive or negative memory? It was a very positive experience for Jenna, along with her then-boyfriend Branden. They had been dating for almost a year before they became intimate, and Jenna doesn't regret it in the slightest.<\/div>
Major illnesses, accidents or traumas? How is s\/he still affected, if at all? She was in a car crash when she was about 14, but she doesn't have any lasting injuries from that.

RELATIONSHIPS WITH OTHERS<\/b><\/div>
Who is his\/her best friend? Jenna doesn't really have any "best friends". She finds it tough trust others. But she is close with one of her roommates, Daniel.<\/div>
Who are his\/her other close friends?<\/div>
How in general does the character relate to friends? She tries to relate and connect with her friends, but she usually struggles and has a tough time with it.<\/div>
… to strangers? Oddly enough, Jenna can relate and connect with strangers better than with anyone else in her life.<\/div>
… to spouse\/Lover? <\/div>
… to past spouses\/lovers? It took her a while to really open up with Branden, but once she did they became extremely close.<\/div>
… to own children, if any?<\/div>
… to other family members? Not very well, really. When she actually takes her mother's phone calls, it's awkward and uncomfortable for Jenna and so the calls usually end after a few minutes.<\/div>
… to the same sex? It takes her a while to be comfortable around other girls.<\/div>
… to the opposite sex? She connects and relates a little bit better with men, but not by much.<\/div>
… to children in general? She loves kids and has always done really well with them.<\/div>
… to others who are more successful? Same<\/div>
… to others who are less successful? Same<\/div>
… to boss (if any)? Her boss is a jerk to her, so she doesn't relate well to him at all.<\/div>
… to underlings at work? Same<\/div>
… to competitors? If anything, she relates with her competitors the best. They're both going after the same things, and they usually have the most in common.<\/div>
… to authority (police, IRS, politicians, attorneys, doctors, etc.)? Same<\/div>
What do most people consider his\/her most likeable trait? Jenna loves to go out and party, have a good time.<\/div>
What do most people consider his\/her biggest flaw? <\/div>
Any secret attractions\/crushes? There is a guy at work that she's had her eye on for a while, but he's engaged so she hasn't ever made a move. Although she wants to.<\/div>
In romantic relationships, is s\/he generally monogamous or uncommitted? (If the latter, is s\/he honest w\/ <\/div>
partners?) Because of her parents breaking up, and seeing nearly every relationship in her life end, Jenna has always been monogamous to her partner. She never wants to hurt, or be hurt, in the way other people in her life were.<\/div>
Is his\/her sexual behavior inhibited, average, experimental, or reckless?<\/b><\/i> 
Has this changed (and if so, why)?<\/div>
Whom does s\/he dislike most, and why?<\/div>
Whom does s\/he like most, and why?<\/div>
Who's the most important person in his\/her life right now, and why? <\/div>
Whom does s\/he secretly admire (nonromantic), and why? <\/div>
Who was his\/her biggest influence, and why? <\/div>
Person s\/he most misunderstands or misjudges:<\/div>
Person who most misunderstands or misjudges him or her:<\/div>
Has s\/he lost touch with anyone significant in his\/her life? If so, why?
Worst end of a relationship (could be friend, romance, colleague…)?<\/div>
Whom does s\/he most rely on for practical advice?<\/div>
Whom does s\/he most rely on for emotional support?<\/div>
Whom, if anyone, does s\/he support (e.g. advice or emotional support)?<\/div>

MENTAL ATTITUDE\/PERSONAL BELIEFS<\/b><\/div>
Any psychological issues (e.g. phobias,  depression, paranoia, narcissism, etc.)?<\/div>
Is s\/he an optimist or pessimist?<\/div>
Meyers Briggs Personality Type (see http:\/\/www.humanmetrics.com\/cgi-win\/jtypes2.asp<\/a>):<\/div>
S\/he is most comfortable when ...  (alone, hanging w\/friends, drinking, etc.): <\/div>
S\/he is most uncomfortable when ... (in a crowd, alone, speaking in public, etc.): <\/div>
Is s\/he cautious, brave, or reckless in his\/her approach to life?<\/div>
What does s\/he most value\/prioritize (family, money, success, religion, etc.)?<\/div>
Whom does s\/he really love best? <\/div>
Whom or what would s\/he be willing to die for?<\/div>
Is s\/he generally compassionate or self-involved?<\/div>
Personal philosophy: <\/div>
What’s his\/her most embarrassing moment?<\/div>
What is his\/her secret wish?<\/div>
What (or who) is his\/her biggest fear?<\/div>
Any prejudices (race, culture, sexuality, religion, etc.)?<\/div>
Political party or beliefs, if any:<\/div>
Does s\/he believe in fate or destiny? Is s\/he superstitious? <\/div>
Character's greatest strength:<\/div>
Other good characteristics:  <\/div>
Character's greatest flaw: <\/div>
Other character flaws: <\/div>
What are his\/her own favorite attributes (both physical and personal)?<\/div>
What about least favorite?<\/div>
Are these feelings accurate?How does s\/he think others perceive him or her? (And is this accurate?)<\/div>
Biggest regret:<\/div>
Other regrets:<\/div>
Proudest accomplishment:<\/div>
Other accomplishments:<\/div>
Quirks: <\/div>
Character's biggest secret(s)? Who else knows (if anyone)? <\/div>
How does s\/he react to a crisis? <\/div>
What usually causes the problems in his\/her life<\/div>","comments":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/80408.html?view=comments#comments"},{"guid":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/79914.html","pubDate":"Fri, 07 Sep 2012 00:11:38 GMT","title":"I Don't Want To Know, Part One (2,361 Words)","author":"wameron","link":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/79914.html","description":"

I was sitting on the couch in the living room, getting lost in daydreams and old memories. I could hear Rob in the kitchen, fixing up a pizza to pop in the oven for lunch. He was happy and whistling a little tune, and it made smile to have him be so happy. But I couldn't help the memories that were flooding my mind, drowning the sounds of Rob out. My eyes started to water as I closed my eyes, reliving things that I hadn't thought of in years.

"Who is that guy?" I asked. Julia grinned at me.
"Oh, that's just William. He lives down the street from me," she replied, still smiling. I eyed the man, working in the garden of his front yard. "Too bad these curtains are in the way, huh?" Julia mumbled, winking at me. I frowned at her.
"What are you talking about, Julia?"
She laughed. "Kate, I can see you undressing him with your eyes! Don't try to hide it," she pointed out. I blushed, stepping away from the window. I waited for Julia to walk away, and I glanced back out the window at William, who was wiping his sweaty brow with the back of his hand.
"Plus, he's dating one of my neighbors," Julia called out from the other room. I couldn't take my eyes off of him as he ripped up weeds and watered plants. "They've been living together for a few months now."
"That's good," I muttered, my eyes still transfixed on him through the window. "Everyone deserves to be happy."<\/i>

"Hey sweetheart, the pizza is done!" Rob said from the kitchen.
I opened my wet eyes and realized I had dozed off for nearly an hour. I sat up and looked around our sparse living room, trying to blink away the tears. Rob walked in then, a plate with a single slice of pizza on it, and he smiled at me. I quickly wiped the tears off of my face and accepted the plate, smiling back at him.
"Thanks, babe," I said. I held the plate, staring down at the pizza in front of me. I could feel Rob staring at me, but I could not fathom meeting his gaze. "This looks great."
"You're welcome, honey." He leaned down and kissed the top of my head, rubbing my hand with his hand. "I'm going to go meet the boys at the bar for a few drinks, okay? I'll be back later tonight."
I nodded, still keeping my eyes down. "Sounds good. Have fun," I said. Rob was already halfway out the door, though, and most likely had not heard anything I had said.
I felt so sick to my stomach I didn't want to even imagine eating the slice of pizza before me. I walked back into the kitchen and set the plate down, leaning against the counter. This home was so small, and it was so much less than what I had wanted. As a kid, I had dreamed of a big house full of noisy kids running around, all smiling and laughing together. I dreamed of living in a quiet little suburb with the man of my dreams, enjoying our nice little life together with our children. But as I looked around the empty, silent house now, I realized how much things change. How much life can change. I was crying again, thinking of all of the things I had wanted my life to be. I had just celebrated my thirty-fifth birthday last month, and I felt like my life was ending. Sure, I had a nice relationship with Rob; a stable job; a respectable home. But I didn't have what I had always wanted most: babies. I closed my eyes again, the tears flowing harder and faster down my cheeks, as I got lost in more memories.

I was walking out of the bank when I ran into him. I had been looking down at my hands, shuffling papers around and not paying any attention to anything around me. I bumped into his chest and looked up, blushing instantly as he smiled down at me.
"Oh, hello there!" William said. His voice was just as beautiful as he was. Not to mention he had the most wonderful English accent. "Sorry, darling. I guess I wasn't paying enough attention!"
I stared back up at him and tried to smile back. "Oh, no! It was all my fault, I assure you," I replied. I glanced back down at my hands and shoved my papers into my purse. I extended my hand to him. "I'm Kate."
"Afternoon, Kate. My name is William," he said, shaking my hand. His hand was large and warm around mine.
"I think we have a mutual friend, actually! Julia Edwards?" I asked. He paused, looking away in thought. He smiled again, and I realized that our hands were still in that shaking position.
"Yes, I know Julia! She lives just down the street from me. She really is lovely," he said, still smiling. His smile was big and bright, and it made me smile right back at him. "How do you know her?"
"Julia and I have been friends for quite some time, actually. We went to college together."
William nodded. He kept looking down into my eyes, and I felt like he could see into my soul. Suddenly, he released my hand and shoved his down into his pocket. He pulled out his phone and frowned at it, checking to see who was calling him. He scoffed and put the phone back where he had grabbed it from. "It was no one," he said, letting out a small chuckle.
I wasn't sure what else to say, but I wanted to stay there and talk to him for as long as I possibly could. "I saw you working on your garden one day last week," I blurted out without thinking. "It's a really beautiful garden, too."
He laughed, full and hard then, and I felt my heart flutter against my rib cage. "Oh, well thank, dear! I've worked very hard on it. It's nice to know that someone appreciates it."
I smiled at him, biting at my lip. Now I really couldn't think of anything else to say.
"I'm so sorry, but I've got to dash. It was a real pleasure meeting you though, Kate. I hope to run into you again," he said. William then took a step toward me and wrapped his arms around me, holding me tight in a hug. I frantically tried to hug him back, and it was one of the best hugs I had ever experienced. He was warm and comfortable, and smelled fantastic. He pulled back and smiled again, and I smiled in return.
"So long, William. See you around," I mumbled, almost inaudibly.<\/i>

I took a deep breath and headed for the stairs. I didn't want to be down there by myself. I was feeling far too lonely, now, with all of this thinking of William. I shuffled up the stairs slowly, trying to control my thoughts and my memories. It was no use, of course. I couldn't manage to get his face out of my brain as I walked into my bedroom. I fell onto the bed, closing my eyes again as I started to sob softly.
My mind went back to that day I ran into him at the bank, and I thought of all the things I know now but didn't know then. The phone call he rejected was from his then girlfriend. He had ignored her just to have a small, awkward conversation with me. Of course, I know why did it now. He had a huge crush on me and wanted to have a chance to just talk to me. William and his girlfriend broke up not too long after that, but she moved out of the house, leaving him still living down the street from Julia. We ran into each other all of the time after that, and I realize now that it was never on accident. He was always trying to find a way to see me, as he told me years down the line. Before the two of us became close, one of my favorite things to do was to stay the night with Julia. We would act like teenagers again and sleep in the living room, stay up far too late listening to music and watching movies. After all, we were only twenty-two years old, so we were still entitled to act a little silly from time to time. We would fall asleep late in the night, nearly morning, but I always managed to wake myself up just in time so that I wouldn't miss it. I would get up in a sleepy haze and fumble my way to the front window and peek out of the curtains into the still dark street. Then, like clock-work, I would see William jogging down the sidewalk. He always went shirtless and wore a pair of tight spandex shorts. He had his iPod in nearly every single time, and he had the most beautiful stride I had ever seen. I would sit there for ten or fifteen minutes sometimes, just to catch a thirty second glimpse of William jogging in the early mornings. It was so worth it, too.
William and I started dating a few months after he became newly single. We took things slow, and we went out on a lot of dates. It was the perfect relationship, really. He was always so perfect, and always treated me so wonderfully. I had gone through a few tough relationships with men in the past, and because of how many times my heart had been broken, I was very hesitant with William. I told him early on that I had no plans on being intimate with him, and that I was planning to wait until I was married. I was fully prepared for him to dump me, or to tell me that I was crazy. But instead, he told me that he loved me even more for making that choice. That it was a choice more people should be making. In fact, from that moment on, he vowed to also wait until he was married. Little did we know that after two years of dating, we would marry each other.
I rolled over onto my side now, hugging my knees tightly against my chest as I continued to cry softly. No matter what I did, I always cried when I thought of William. Of course I cried, I told myself. He was my first love, my first husband. He was the perfect man, and I had screwed it all up.

The first year of our marriage was pure bliss. We moved into a little apartment together and started to make a nice little home in a peaceful residential area. William worked in landscaping and I had just been hired at an elementary school as a kindergarten teacher. Our lives were perfect, and I couldn't have asked for anything better. After our third anniversary, we left the little apartment and found a beautiful house in the suburbs, close to the school where I worked, and bought it. It was a great big spacious house, with quite a few bedrooms.
"In just a few years," William had said once, "all of these rooms will be filled with our sweet babies."
I believed what he said, and I couldn't wait until we started to build our family. But as our fourth year of marriage grew closer, and we were nowhere near having a child, I was starting to worry. We had been trying for nearly a year to get pregnant, but nothing seemed to be working. Finally, he scheduled an appointment for the both of us on a day we both had off from work. We went in and we were both tested. I was confident that there was nothing wrong with either of us, and that our problem was that we just weren't trying hard enough. In the back of my mind, though, I had a feeling that I was completely wrong.
The two of us sat in the exam room, William in the chair and me on the cold uncomfortable bed. I wasn't sure why I was placed up there, but I wasn't thinking much of it at the time. I kept looking at William and smiling, and he would smile back. I had never noticed that there were tears in his eyes.
The doctor came back in, a somber expression on his face. I was sure that it was all a joke, that he was just trying to be silly with us. But then when I glanced at William and saw that he had the same look, I knew something was wrong.
"So, what's the verdict?" I asked quietly. The doctor sat down across from me, taking his glasses off slowly.
"I'm so sorry, but it looks like you two can't have children," he replied. I frowned at him.
"Are you sure?" I said. He nodded, looking at me with one of the saddest expressions I had ever seen.
"Katie, sweetheart," William breathed, reaching out to take my hand. He was crying, now.
"Is it me, doctor? Am I the problem?" I asked, my voice quivering. I felt tears stinging at the corners of my eyes.
"Kate, don't ask that!" William exclaimed, frowning at me. I turned and looked at him, tears streaming down my cheeks. "It's not important."
"Yes, it is, William. If it's me, then..."
I let my voice trail off as I tried to blink away the tears. I looked back to the doctor and nodded at him. "Please, just tell me if I'm the problem."
He looked down at the file in his hands and flipped it open. He looked over some results and took a deep breath, lifting his head to meet my eyes again.
"I'm afraid you aren't capable of having children, Kate," he said quietly.<\/i>

I was now shaking as I laid there on my bed, crying harder than I had in years.
<\/a>
","comments":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/79914.html?view=comments#comments","category":"fic: original works"},{"guid":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/79661.html","pubDate":"Tue, 04 Sep 2012 21:08:12 GMT","title":"Just a little something. 984 Words.","author":"wameron","link":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/79661.html","description":"

My day had been going by so slowly. I had the day off from work, and so I was relaxing doing nothing in my apartment. I was checking the time constantly all afternoon, waiting for when you would get home so I could go and see you. I had never gone through a slower day in memory. I was sitting there on my couch, absently staring at the ceiling, when an idea struck me. I stood up and changed into jeans and a shirt and rushed out of the house. I walked quickly down the sidewalk, the mid-morning sun warm on face. I tried not to smile as I turned the idea over and over in my head, but of course it was no use. I walked for a few blocks, turning here and there, until I finally reached my destination. The car in the driveway was gone, but I knew it would be. I took the few strides up to the front door and turned the knob, hoping it would be unlocked. Sure enough, it was. I smiled again; you had always trusted people too easily.
I entered your empty home silently. I was grateful that you would not be home for quite sometime. I walked down the small hallway and turned right into your room, closing my eyes and inhaling deeply. I could still smell the handsome scent of your cologne in the air. I looked around your room, seeing that you had failed to straighten the sheets and blankets on your bed. I smiled, recalling the nights that we had spent together in that bed. I wandered over to your dresser and opened one of the drawers. I moved a few shirts around, trying to find my favorite one of yours. Just as I was thinking that perhaps you had worn it that day, I found it and pulled it out. I slipped off my own shirt, tossing it over onto the bed, and pulled on yours. It was a little bit too big for me, but I didn't care. I hugged it around myself, smelling your cologne once more. I walked to the bed and fell onto the soft mattress, wrapping the top blanket around my body. I could have stayed there all afternoon, but then I realized that maybe you were going to come home for lunch. I jumped up and hurried out of your room, shutting the door gently behind me. I should have left then, after coming into your house and putting on your shirt and lying in your bed. I didn't want to be there if you decided to come home. But then I glanced down the hallway into the bathroom, and I could see a bottle of bubbles for a bath sitting on the edge of the tub. I grinned and headed straight for it. You always hung your robe up on the back of the door, and sure enough there it was on the hook. I pulled off my jeans and your shirt and slipped my arms into your robe. I turned the knob on the bathtub and left to wait while the water grew warmer. I wandered back down the hallway. I had been in your house with you countless times before, but it somehow felt different now. The only sound was the water running into the tub, and my feet on the soft carpet. As I walked toward the den, I looked at the pictures that were hanging on the walls. You had hung several of you and your family. There was only one of the two of us, but that was alright. I smiled at our picture, reaching out to straighten it even though it was already perfect.
I continued to the den and walked up to your record player. No matter how much I had tried to persuade you, you were always so stubborn when it came to your vinyl records. You were never willing to part with them, even if you were paid for them. I smiled, rifling through your vast collection. I pulled out a record that I knew the both of us loved and put it on the track. The sounds of Johnny Cash quickly filled the house. I was heading back to the bathroom for my bath when something caught me eye in the spare room. I walked into the sparse room and looked at the desk against the wall. There was an envelope on it, and your named was scrawled elegantly across it. I smiled and picked it up, trying to remember when I would have left you a love note. I opened it up and pulled out the piece of paper inside, and saw that there were just a few lines written. I read them once through and frowned. I wasn't sure how many times I read them before it sank in. It wasn't in my handwriting. This simple, yet beautiful, love note was not written in my writing at all.
"Hello, love. I love you so, love. Meet me at midnight."
I felt my throat swell up as the tears stung at the corners of my eyes. I went back into the bathroom and turned the water off. I clawed at your stupid robe and threw it to the ground, pulling my jeans back on. I ran back into your bedroom, tossing what was my favorite shirt of yours onto the bed to grab my own. I slipped it on and walked back out. I stood there in the hallway for a few minutes. I closed my eyes and began to cry as my heart was slowly breaking. I made my way back to the front door and pulled it open. I turned back to look at your still empty house, tears flowing down my cheeks. I had a feeling that this would be the last time I would step across that threshold.
<\/a>

","comments":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/79661.html?view=comments#comments","category":"fic: original works"},{"guid":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/77948.html","pubDate":"Fri, 24 Aug 2012 23:25:57 GMT","title":"Here's Another Update!","author":"wameron","link":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/77948.html","description":"Not much time to leave a nice, lengthy update because I need to shower and get ready for work. But basically, my word count is just over 40k right now. I have about 9k left to write. I AM SO HAPPY AND PROUD OF MYSELF.
Although, I'm not sure if what I'm doing is cheating. Cause see, I've got two different stories going on. I have my Neil\/Lily one, and then a new one I started last week about Tom\/Emily. Oh well. I'm counting them both together, so there!!

I'm just excited that I've made it this far, really. Just a week left to get 9k words in. I can totally do that! I just need to write something everyday.
Alright, update over I guess. So l long!","comments":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/77948.html?view=comments#comments"},{"guid":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/76023.html","pubDate":"Mon, 06 Aug 2012 22:20:09 GMT","title":"Random Update? YES!","author":"wameron","link":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/76023.html","description":"So this month has gone pretty well as far as Camp NaNoWriMo. Only six days in and my word count is already 18,762. I am so proud of myself! I never do this well and it's just awesome.
I also have really great people in my cabin. They're all really nice and funny and supportive. It's just nice.

Recently, some things have come up about a couple of friends of mine, and it's been really stressful.
I have decided, though, to just not let myself trust people as easily. I forgive too easily and too quickly, but I have never been able to change that. Sadly.


Anyway. Okay. Pointless update is over.
Back to Tumblr I go...","comments":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/76023.html?view=comments#comments"},{"guid":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/75516.html","pubDate":"Sat, 04 Aug 2012 23:17:26 GMT","title":"August Camp: Day Four, 1317 Words.","author":"wameron","link":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/75516.html","description":"

"Please, we do not want any trouble," Neil said softly. He reached his hand back into his pocket and pulled out his wallet. "Here, take it. Just please, leave us alone."
I was shaking so badly, but Neil had one hand on me to keep my body behind his. I was holding onto his shoulders, trying not to squeeze too hard, but I could not help it. His voice was strong and sure, but I could feel Neil quivering under my touch.
The masked man snatched Neil's wallet and rifled through it, throwing pictures and other useless things onto the ground. He grabbed the credit cards and shoved them into his pockets before tossing the wallet aside. He was still holding the gun up, pointing it directly at Neil.
"What else you got?" he barked. I jumped suddenly, letting out a soft scream. Neil reached up and grabbed my hand with his.
"Please, this is all we have. Just go," Neil muttered. I could hear that the quivering had reached his voice. I started to cry.
The man took a few steps toward us, and Neil instinctively backed up as did I. Now he had both hands behind him, pushing me back as far as I could go. I reached out and grabbed at his hands, trying to pull him along with me. But just as I touched his skin, he brought his hands back to himself and held them up.
"We do not have anything else, so just please--"
The gun went off with a loud bang, and Neil fell to the ground. I screamed and watched him as he was falling, all in slow motion. As he finally hit the cold, hard ground, I saw that there were tears in his eyes. I looked up at the man with the gun, prepared to throw myself at him and beat him senseless, but he was running in the opposite direction. I tried to move forward, tried to follow after that bastard, but my feet seemed to be stuck. I wanted to chase him, to grab that gun he had just fired and shoot him with it. But then I heard Neil gasping for breath, and I fell to the ground as well. I crawled toward him and cradled his head in my arms, my tears already dropping onto his face. He looked up at me, but I could see the strain already there.
"Neil, are you okay?" I whispered. I looked down at his body, and saw that the man had shot him once right through his chest. There was so much blood.
"I do not think so, Lily," he breathed. He was staring up at me, crying himself. He brought a hand up and stroked my cheek gently, and I began to cry even harder.
"You are so beautiful, Lily," he gasped, trying to smile. "I love you so much, always remember that."
"No, you are not allowed to say goodbye, Neil Everett," I told him. I put my hands on his wound, trying to control the bleeding but it seeped through my fingers. 
"I was going to marry you, and give you the life you wanted," he said. He was smiling now, but still the tears streamed from his eyes.
"You still are going to marry me, Neil. We are going to get married in a few months, and everything will be okay," I said. I looked back down at his chest, and realized that he probably only had a few minutes left. "The ambulance is going to come, and you are going to be fine. I will take you home and take care of you, and then we will get married."
"I would have loved you my entire life, Lilian Grey. Never forget that," he told me. His hand was still holding my cheek. I felt myself starting to shake.
"You are going to love me your entire life, Neil, because you are not going to..." My voice trailed off. I did not want to say it, I could not find it in myself to say it. "Die."
He smiled at me again. "I am going to die."
"No, you are going to live. And we are going to get married and have children. They will look just like you, and they will have your great sense of humor and your same level of loving and caring. They will be amazing, just like you are." I did not know what else to say, but I did not want to stop talking. I could not stop. I could see the light draining from his eyes. "We are going to get a house with a great big yard where the kids can run, and maybe we will even get a dog. Every kid needs a dog."
"Good night, Lilian Grey," Neil gasped.
I felt him try to take another breath, but his body staggered, and then his eyes went cold. They were fixed on my face, and I looked at his chest. It was still, not rising and not falling. I looked back at his face as his hand fell from holding my cheek. I knew he was gone, but I did not want to believe it.
"Neil, please, please do not be gone," I whispered. I stroked his face, his hair, tried to get him to move. His blank eyes simply stared straight through me. "Neil!" I screamed.
I have no idea how long I sat there, holding his limp body in my arms before someone showed up. It was a nice old lady who called the ambulance. She tried to have me stand up, step away from Neil, but I could not leave him. I did not want to just leave him there alone on the cold ground. I wanted to hold him, because maybe if I held him tight enough or long enough, he would wake up. Or maybe I would wake up, all of this being a dream. I shut my eyes tightly and opened them again, but I was still sitting there, alone, as I held Neil in my arms. My tears were flowing quite quickly as I reached out and shut his eyelids, and I could feel that his body was already getting cold.
When the ambulance came, they propped him up on one of the gurneys and wheeled him into the vehicle. I wanted to go with them, but someone said something about me needing to stay there because the police needed my statement. I just wanted to be him. What if he was really still alive? What if he somehow woke up? I needed to be there in case that happened.
After being at that damn crime scene for half an hour, I was finally escorted to the hospital. Neil had been officially declared dead, but I did not believe them. I asked to see him, but they said I could not. They said that I was too fragile, and that I should just take a seat and try to calm down. I remembered screaming at them, telling them that he was not really dead. That he could not be. We were going to get married, and I was going to be Lilian Everett, and we were supposed to have a perfect life together.
I suppose at some point, someone had called both Martin and my father. They showed up as I was screaming, and Martin wrapped his arms around me and pulled me outside. I did not want to be outside, though. It was cold out there, and outside was where Neil had been shot. I wanted to be inside in case he woke up.
"Lily, please," Martin breathed, hugging me tightly. "He is gone."
"No, he can't be, Martin," I gasped, crying into his shirt. "We have to get married."
"I know, sweetheart, I know," he said. I felt his tears fall into my hair.<\/p>
<\/a>
","comments":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/75516.html?view=comments#comments","category":"camp nanowrimo 2012"},{"guid":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/74342.html","pubDate":"Thu, 02 Aug 2012 06:34:21 GMT","title":"30 Day NaNoWriMo Questions!","author":"wameron","link":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/74342.html","description":"Day 1 - Have you participated in NaNoWriMo before?  If so, which years and what end result?  If not (or even if so, for that matter), what’s your connection to writing?  Why do you want to participate this year?<\/span>

I participated in the normal sessions in November in 2010 and 2011. I lost both years, but I made it a lot further in '11 than I did the year before. The first year, I made it like two days in, but the second year I got about ten days. It was awesome!
I love writing. I love creating and coming up with people and their stories and personalities and how they function. It's just so fascinating to me. I've been writing since about fifth grade, at least.
Like I said, I love writing. Any chance to try and further my skill, I will take it :)","comments":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/74342.html?view=comments#comments","category":"nanowrimo prep"},{"guid":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/70740.html","pubDate":"Wed, 25 Jul 2012 08:53:07 GMT","title":"Ughhh....","author":"wameron","link":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/70740.html","description":"So tomorrow night (technically tonight) I'll be doing my first overnight shift for Target. First overnight ever, really.
I go in at 10pm and get off at 6:30am. I am really not looking forward to it. It's actually really been stressing me out since I found out I would have to work it. But a couple co-workers of mine have tried to reassure me, telling me that it's actually kind of fun and blah blah blah. I'm still gonna screw myself up! I don't care if it's fun...jeez.

That's why I'm up late right now. It's nearly 2am. I'm going to sleep in in the morning, and then when I get home from work take a small nap. And on Thursday night, at like 9pm I'll probably take two tylenol pm. Because those things are magical.


One of the only things that is really keeping me sane is my new novel idea\/storyline\/whatever for the August session of Camp. I'm gonna have, yes you guessed it, BENEDICT CUMBERBATCH be my main male character. I'm super excited for it
:D","comments":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/70740.html?view=comments#comments"},{"guid":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/70336.html","pubDate":"Sun, 22 Jul 2012 20:31:25 GMT","title":"Obsession. Like Whoa.","author":"wameron","link":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/70336.html","description":"I know myself pretty well by now. But I never expected to become as obsessed with Benedict Cumberbatch as I have. Holy crap.
I follow his tag on Tumblr, along with Cumberbum. And can I just say, how glorious that Cumberbum tag is? Seriously. Beautiful stuff there.
His voice is just pure perfection. Gahh. I accidentally downloaded an audio book and he narrates it. Yeah, I've already listened to it about three times.
I just want to sit and watch Sherlock all day because he is so flawlessly handsome in it. I think I'm going to try and find some of his other works on Netflix or Hulu.
I remember when I saw Sherlock on Netflix. I thought, Meh I'll watch it eventually and I probably won't like it. How wrong was I?!


In other news, I hate my job now. I really wanna find a new one.
I think I'm gonna try to do CampNaNoWriMo in August as well. It's gonna be a crap storyline, but at this point I don't really care. I kind of just want to write what I feel like writing.
Anyway. Yeah, so that's what is going on in my life. Not much, I know. My time is either spent at home on tumblr or sims, and the other time I'm at work.

OH. I finished Looking For Alaska. Cried like a baby. Now I'm about halfway through Paper Towns. I think that one is also going to take me a long time to finish. I think my subconscious is like "No! It's a John Green book. You're going to cry for like a week and everything will be confusing."","comments":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/70336.html?view=comments#comments","category":"fandom: sherlock"},{"guid":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/70106.html","pubDate":"Sat, 14 Jul 2012 07:55:49 GMT","title":"Sleep?...What...?","author":"wameron","link":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/70106.html","description":"Yeah, here I am with it being nearly one in the morning. I should have gone to bed about two hours ago. But of course, for some stupid reason I am sitting here still awake. I blame my mind. It never fully shuts off. My mom has the same problem. That's why she takes ambien, it quiets her mind. Creepy? Yeah, try living with that for more than half of your life.

Anyway, that's not what I'm here to talk about.
I came up with a new character. Kind of. It's just a name for right now, but this name won't stop coming up in my head.
Celine Rossi.
Yeah, I still don't know how I feel about it. I have a friend named Celine, so that might be an issue. But for some reason I just love this name. I picture this feisty, fiercely independent young woman who stands up for herself and her loved ones. But she also falls in love too quickly, and gets hurt too often. She is beautiful, but simply sees herself as another average girl.

So yeah. Not sure what to do with that. I've had a scene bouncing around in my head for the last week, so I might be typing that up sometime tomorrow. Although technically it is tomorrow....sigh.
Well I'm starting to get a bit dizzy and my eyes are struggling to focus now, so good night.


(Did you know that you could suffer from insomnia because of your period?? YEAH! Cool, huh? Not really, I guess...but still)","comments":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/70106.html?view=comments#comments"},{"guid":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/69856.html","pubDate":"Fri, 13 Jul 2012 07:19:43 GMT","title":"SO HAPPY!!!","author":"wameron","link":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/69856.html","description":"My brother bought himself a new laptop, so he is selling me his netbook for $150. I'm paying him $50 each month now for a few months until I have paid him back.
But he came into town today, and gave it to me anyway (what a great brother! This is also the same brother that, without knowing much about it, bought me season one of Sherlock for my birthday. So he gets MAJOR cool points already!).

It's not as fast as my dad's laptop, but it's good enough. And better than our piece of crap family computer. This plays youtube really well, I can come on this site, facebook. I haven't tried tumblr yet but I am just assuming it will be all fine.
So YAY for having my own netbook!!


On another side note, I may have accidentally stumbled upon a new novel idea. I have no idea what it would be about, or any of the characters. But I was at work tonight, and all of a sudden these two voiceless characters started having a conversation in my head! About guys, of course. Haha.
So yeah. I may try to dig up more from my brain about where these characters have been hiding. Who knows, maybe I'll have enough to do the August session of Camp :)","comments":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/69856.html?view=comments#comments"},{"guid":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/69379.html","pubDate":"Fri, 13 Jul 2012 00:15:45 GMT","title":"Looking For Alaska","author":"wameron","link":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/69379.html","description":"I borrowed this book from my friend back in April. And yeah, I'm terrible, but it has taken me until now to get about 80 pages in. It's because I had just read The Fault in Our Stars and I was still reeling from that. I couldn't afford to get invested in new characters just yet.

Anyway, I really like this book. I'm at the part where Miles decides to stay at Culver Creek during the Thanksgiving break, and he and Alaska just drank some Strawberry Hill where she buried it.
I hope to finish the book sometime next week. I freaking love John Green. So much!


Worked out yesterday. And today. But I think I might have to tone it down a bit, because my right knee starts to really hurt in the middle of my exercise. Which is SUPER inconvenient.
So far I feel really good. Granted, it is only day two. But still. I'm really sore today, but it's a good sore. A sore that means I'm actually moving and doing stuff as opposed to sitting and doing nothing.

Also, my mother said she would chip in $50. So that makes it $150 at the end of the year.
And with the money I transfer into my savings account each month, I should have about $400 in savings by January.
Things are looking :)","comments":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/69379.html?view=comments#comments","category":"weight loss journey"},{"guid":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/69243.html","pubDate":"Wed, 11 Jul 2012 21:54:26 GMT","title":"Okay.","author":"wameron","link":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/69243.html","description":"(First off, I realize how much I love to say okay. And then I remembered that Hazel and Augustus say Okay to each other, and it just makes me want to say it more.)


I am so tired of not loving who I see when I look in the mirror. I try to tell myself that I'm a great person, that I have great attributes that make me beautiful. But I know I'm so full of it.
I've struggled with weight my whole life. It was not easy being overweight as a child. I can still remember in fifth grade, a kid telling me that it's called Slim Fast not Slim Slow.
It never really hit me how overweight I am until a couple of years ago. A guy moved into town, and he liked a certain type of girl. So I did everything I could to be what he liked. I lost about 15 pounds, but then something changed. I realized I was doing it for the wrong reasons, so I just stopped. Of course, I have gained all of the weight back since then.
At one point (I think it was in high school) I was almost 200lbs. I honestly have no idea how I got that out of control.

Last night I was talking to my dad about my lack of motivation, and he suggested I join my brother and his wife in their weight loss challenge. I told him that that would not motivate me at all. They live in another state, and it just does not make me want to get up and do anything. So my dad, being the smart guy he is, told me he would give me one hundred dollars if I lost 20lbs by the end of the year.
Motivation, I have found you.

On Monday, July 9th 2012, I weighed 177lbs. My goal is to be at 155lbs by December 31st 2012.
We have a treadmill, along with a Wii and a great exercise disc (Wii Active). I'm tired of feeling like crap. I'm tired of not feeling pretty and comfortable in my own skin.
I'm going to do something about that, and change.","comments":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/69243.html?view=comments#comments","category":["weight loss journey","time to change"]},{"guid":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/69055.html","pubDate":"Sun, 08 Jul 2012 20:06:27 GMT","title":"I Love TV.","author":"wameron","link":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/69055.html","description":"So I'm kind of maybe a little bit in love with the show Community. My friend let me borrow his season one DVD, but that was all he had of the show. Now I have a Hulu+ account and am nearly ten episodes into season three. I really freaking love this show.
I ship Jeff\/Annie. So hard.
I think I only really started to watch this show because I realized how gosh dang sexy Joel McHale is. He takes his shirt\/clothes off quite often in the show, and I am SO grateful for that!!


Next I think I might watch Eureka. But who knows. I just know that for the next three days I have off work, there is going to be a lot of Community watching and Sims playing. Maybe even some Everquest :D","comments":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/69055.html?view=comments#comments","category":"fandom: community"},{"guid":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/68638.html","pubDate":"Sat, 30 Jun 2012 20:37:14 GMT","title":"Weekend.","author":"wameron","link":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/68638.html","description":"I guess I am a permenant member of the closing shift at work now. Sucktown!

My parents are leaving for Reno tomorrow morning, which means it shall just be me until Tuesday!! WOO!!!
Well, partially. My sister has to stay with me Sunday night cause I'm working, but then she's leaving Monday morning so back to party time haha!

However, sad point: my dad is taking his laptop. So I'll be stuck with our poopy PC all weekend. Curses.
I'll be playing Sims a lot then! Ha!","comments":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/68638.html?view=comments#comments"},{"guid":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/68411.html","pubDate":"Fri, 29 Jun 2012 03:56:43 GMT","title":"Uhh...","author":"wameron","link":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/68411.html","description":"I'm done watching all of the Vlogbrother videos. I watched all of the Katherine playing Zelda. I've watched a buttload of other Hankgames stuff. I watched Lizzie Bennet Diaries....

I don't really know what else to do on youtube anymore. I just spent a bunch of hours on tumblr, so that was nice.
If you haven't already, I would suggest you go and watch LBD. It's pretty great.

Gonna go watch Rookie Blue now. In an hour, of course. Blerg.","comments":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/68411.html?view=comments#comments","category":"nerdfighteria"},{"guid":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/68116.html","pubDate":"Thu, 28 Jun 2012 02:03:35 GMT","title":"Rant.","author":"wameron","link":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/68116.html","description":"

Lately I've been really hard on myself, for whatever reasons. I'm 20 now, and so that means that I'm even harder on myself than I ever have been. I've been worried about certain things, and it's just really been bringing me down. But I realized something: I am freaking awesome.
I'm not just saying that to toot my own horn, but I'd like to think I'm a pretty cool person. I love and care about people so deeply, and once you're my friend you will have to do a lot to make me really hate you and never be your friend anymore. I'm pretty funny, and I love making my friends laugh because I feel like I'm accomplishing something when they smile and are happy. I don't really care about my own crap, so long as people around me can be happy and have a good time.<\/p>

I have this awesome ability to love anything. Literally, anything. Sadly it is usually TV shows or online communities, but I freaking love them to death. And I love the people who love those things with me.<\/p>

<\/p>

I'm not really able to put into words what my brain is thinking right now, but basically it's this:<\/p>

Out of all of the guys that I have ever met, for some reason it ends. Be it badly or perfectly, it still ends. But you know what, it really is their loss. Because I am one of the coolest people you can have in your life. And if you stupidly decide that I'm too lame, or weird, or whatever, sucks for you then. I would have brightened up your day at least once. But hey, my life is going pretty well without you in it so you must have made the right choice for us both!<\/p>

<\/p>

<\/p>

Sorry for this rant, but I just had these words floating around and I wanted to make sense of them somehow.<\/p>","comments":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/68116.html?view=comments#comments"},{"guid":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/68044.html","pubDate":"Tue, 26 Jun 2012 22:45:12 GMT","title":"FRENCH THE LLAMA!!","author":"wameron","link":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/68044.html","description":"On March first of this year, I decided to try and watch all of the videos posted by the great vlogbrothers on youtube. At the time, they had uploaded 940 videos. It seemed so easy for some reason, the thought of watching 940 four minute long videos of two brothers sharing their lives with each other and ultimately the world. But it was not as easy as I thought.

BUT! Today, June 26, 2012, I am officially caught up on vlogbrothers videos!!! I have watched ALL of their 974 uploaded videos. It's been so amazing to try and cram five and a half years into the last three and a half months.

I feel like my life is different now, after watching the videos of these two men. I actually feel I am apart of something, something that will not only help people now but help people down the line. I got my This Star Won't Go Out bracelet in the mail today, and I nearly started to cry. Because of Esther. And all that she was, all that she still is. The fact that even though she died, she still lives because of Nerdfigthers and everyone else who wear these bracelets.

I am just so grateful to John and Hank who decided back in 2007 to start making videos to each other. My family thinks I am so silly to have spent this much time with an online community, that I'm silly to love these guys and these people as much as I do.
But it's not silly. It just shows that I found a great community of people to belong to. And they are so much more than a community. They're a family. And it's just awesome.
DFTBA.","comments":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/68044.html?view=comments#comments","category":["nerdfighteria","esther earl"]},{"guid":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/67675.html","pubDate":"Thu, 14 Jun 2012 21:23:36 GMT","title":"Lame.","author":"wameron","link":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/67675.html","description":"Week two is almost over, and I've written...nothing. Squat. Zilch. Nada. A big fat zero.

I have a feeling that I will write more before the month is over, but for right now I just don't feel it. This happens pretty much every time. I get super into it, burn out week two and write a few thousand words in the last few days. I just really want to hit my personal goal of 25k for the month.
I'm confident I can do that, at least!


I get paid tomorrow. Really looking forward to that, since I've had less than one hundred dollars in my account for about two weeks. I think I have ten dollars in there now, so getting money tomorrow will be so freaking nice!

I am twenty years old now, my birthday was on the fifth.
Does that mean I'm a real adult now??","comments":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/67675.html?view=comments#comments"},{"guid":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/67472.html","pubDate":"Thu, 07 Jun 2012 08:19:58 GMT","title":"Ahh Yeah.","author":"wameron","link":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/67472.html","description":"In the hour that I had left of the sixth of June, I was able to write 1,457 words. Yeah!! That's pretty good for me to write, in less than an hour.
And then I was able to write about 1,800 words (a little more but I can't remember the exact number) as of now for the eighth.

Again, I am very proud of myself. Although my back is killing me haha! Time for sleep I think.
I only need 1,528 until I am caught up on my word count. Yay!!
:D","comments":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/67472.html?view=comments#comments"},{"guid":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/66885.html","pubDate":"Thu, 07 Jun 2012 06:12:13 GMT","title":"Curses!!","author":"wameron","link":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/66885.html","description":"So here I am, with just about an hour left in this day.
My word count is supposed to be at 10,000 by midnight. It's currently at 6,847. I don't know if I can do it! I would need to write 3,153 words in order to catch up completely.

And I understand, the point of NaNoWriMo is not really about staying current on the word count. It's all about writing and letting your brain wander and to test your skills. But that's a lot of words to write in an hour....
I guess I'll make this my birthday blog then.


So yesterday I turned 20 years old. Still weird for me to say\/think about. Anyway, I had a really great day. Went to lunch with my sister, she bought me Rookie Blue season two (which I kind of freaked out about because I love this show) and then I just spent a nice lazy day at home for a few hours. I went to my normal Tuesday night church class, and my cool dad decided to surprise me by bringing a cake at the end of the class as a treat. They all sang happy birthday to me too. It was really nice! Then went to a friend's house for (more) cake and ice cream, and while it was fun when it started it slowly went a bit downhill fast. But we won't talk about that.
Basically, I had a fanastic and wonderful birthday. It even continued into today, because my best friend from high school took me to lunch.
So yeah. I might write some, but I don't think I will tonight. And sadly tomorrow is my last day off of four days in a row! DARN!","comments":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/66885.html?view=comments#comments"},{"guid":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/66459.html","pubDate":"Tue, 05 Jun 2012 04:23:06 GMT","title":"So Far...","author":"wameron","link":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/66459.html","description":"Camp has been pretty decent so far. I wrote just about 1,700 words the first two days and was feeling pretty good about that. But then on the third, yesterday, I was SO insanely busy! I had church from 10-12, then I worked 1-5:45, then I had a birthday dinner with my parents after work, then went night swimming at a friend's house until about 11:30. I had had a massive headache all day yesterday, so as soon as I got home last night I took a couple tylenol PM and passed out! It was nice haha.
Sadly, though, it also meant that I didn't write anything whatsoever yesterday. I actually wasn't going to write anything today either, I was thinking about just giving up. So I played Sims for pretty much all afternoon until about two or three. Then I got on my dad's laptop and started to type.
And then, at 7:30, I had a word count of 3,380 words. For today alone. YEAH! I so did my happy dance!!!

I am so incredibly proud of myself. I am also SO proud of my cabinmates on the website! The lowest word count is mine at 6,847, but the next is 7,000 and I think the highest is like almost 11,000. These people are so amazing!
Anyway. So that's my update on Camp. And it's nice because I don't have to go back to work until Friday.
Also, my birthday is tomorrow. I'll be 20 :D","comments":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/66459.html?view=comments#comments"},{"guid":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/65072.html","pubDate":"Fri, 01 Jun 2012 08:51:34 GMT","title":"Here We Go!","author":"wameron","link":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/65072.html","description":"It is now almost two in the morning here in beautiful (but SUPER hot) California. And it took me from a little bit after midnight to about now to get my first day's worth of writing in.
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

Yeah, it may only be the first day, but I really liked it. I think that because I am SO tired right now and while I was writing it, I wasn't really worried about it making sense or typos or that kind of crap haha. But I am proud of what I just wrote.
I mean, 1,742 words in less than two hours? That makes me happy :D


Work earlier tonight sucked. Really bad. I screwed up in a major way, and I kind of cried once I got home. But I owned up to what I did, and I took and will take full responsibilty. Yay for being an adult...
Anyway. I am going to bed now :P
Here's to a June filled with lots of good writing and healthy plot!!","comments":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/65072.html?view=comments#comments"},{"guid":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/64650.html","pubDate":"Thu, 31 May 2012 22:07:55 GMT","title":"YEAH!","author":"wameron","link":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/64650.html","description":"Tomorrow is the start of the June session of Camp NaNoWriMo. And yeah, I have my characters and plot and somewhat of a setting, but I was kinda freaking out about tomorrow. I wasn't really sure I would be able to start writing.
BUT!
For some reason, I just realized how fun it would be if I created another character! So I did!!

She's Autumn's half sister; their father was with a lady about five years before meeting Autumn's mother, and there ya have it, Emma Banks is born! WOO!!!


This has totally gotten me inspired and ready for tomorrow, and just June in general! I am ready to take on that goal of 25k words in a month! YES!
Also, good luck to anyone writing in June, or August for that matter. Or ever! You're amazing :D","comments":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/64650.html?view=comments#comments"},{"guid":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/64312.html","pubDate":"Wed, 30 May 2012 18:03:09 GMT","title":"Letter To You.","author":"wameron","link":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/64312.html","description":"Wow, where do I even begin? You have really become my best friend in the last couple of months. If someone had told me that we would be this close when we first met, I would have laughed in their face. Cause remember, I didn't even like you at all when we first met!
But now....you have become so important to me. And it's not even that I want to date you or whatever, it's that I just care about you so much all of a sudden. When you're sad and upset or just in an off mood it not only effects me, but I want to do whatever I can to make you smile.
Speaking of smile, you should see my face when you text me. Or when I'm at a friend's house and you walk in. I don't think you've noticed yet, but I smile like a freaking fool. And I blush. Yeah, I'm pretty sure I turn into a little girl when you're around.
I think what really started it all was after we went on that date. I still saw you as a friend when we went out, but then when you kept opening all the doors for me after the date, even now a few months later. I keep expecting you to not open the car door when you take me somewhere; I keep waiting for you to just get in on your side and then I get in myself. But no, you're too good to slip up, huh? I love it when you unlock and open the door for me. It never fails to make me smile every single time.

But here's the thing. I really like you, a lot, and you have made me the happiest I've been in a while. But I fell in love with this other guy about a year and a half ago, and you're the first guy I've had feelings for since him. I'm terrified to let go of how I feel for him, because I feel like if I give you or any other guy a chance and you hurt me, I still want to be able to say that I love this other guy. He truly is one of my soul mates, I know that for sure (even though he doesn't feel the same way about me).
Also, I am so scared because...I could see myself really falling for you. Hard. You're just like the other guy, but so much better. You actually care about me, you don't just talk about yourself but you ask me questions and we actually talk. I'm scared to open up to you and let you even have the smallest part of my heart, because it has never worked out well for me. I don't know how well I would handle being heartbroken again. It was the worst feeling I have ever gone through.

So. Here I am. Pouring out my heart and soul to you. I'm sure you already think I like you, but I don't think you ever realized it was this bad. And if nothing ever becomes of these feelings, if you don't feel the same way, I think it will still be okay. Like I said, you've kind of become a best friend to me, and that's how I will always see you. No matter what.","comments":"https:\/\/wameron.livejournal.com\/64312.html?view=comments#comments"}]}}