Unquiet
Things

Friends, I found the world’s best, most awesomest planner. Can’t no one tell me otherwise. By god, this’ll be the year I do a plan!

(But also see this year.) (And this one.)

I am having one of those low, gross occasions when I know there is something looming on the horizon that I desperately do not want to do, and so I’ve lost all motivation to do anything productive or useful, or anything good for me in any way in the meantime. And those are actually the things that will bolster me and give me the strength and mental capacity to tackle this thing!

But…that’s not the way my brain works. This is basically an extended version of the “I have an appointment/phone call/whatever at 2pm, so I am paralyzed until it’s over with” scenario, ugh. Except my thing is happening later next week, and it’s a work thing, a conference that I have to travel for, where I will have to mingle and be professional and shit. NO THANKS WE HATES IT.

(Yes, yes, in recent months I know I mentioned I was worried about losing my job, and now I am complaining that ~gasp!~ I have to do my job? Be happy you still have a job, right? Listen, I can both like a paycheck and resent every moment I spend earning that paycheck!)

(This is also why I could never quit my day job to focus solely on writing. Firstly, I just don’t “trust the universe to provide” like that, and secondly, I just like money too much, okay?!)

Anyway, when I get to feeling panicky and overwhelmed like this, I just have to remember that it helps to do one thing. Just one thing. It doesn’t even matter what that one thing is. Just something to focus on for a second; make room in my brain for just one freaking thing, and sit with it until I finish it. Usually, this clears the way for me to do the next thing. And then something else. And in the middle of it all, I start to feel a modicum of normalcy again.

So I took a photo of my new planner! (I never said it had to be a super important thing!) And now I am working on the second pass of edits for my forthcoming book. Sort of wild how it’s listed on Amazon and it’s not even properly finished yet, ha! After that, I plan to write the monthly cards for my Patreon supporters. And no doubt between all of that, I will need to take Lucy for a walk, or several, as she’s an old gal with a tiny bladder. And yes, I am doing this all between tasks for my day job, hehehe.

My brother-in-law (Yvan’s eldest brother) is in the hospital right now; he just had a massive tumor removed from behind his ear. He came out of the surgery okay, and I think they removed most of the mass, but think good thoughts for him, please! No doubt this, too, worrying and fretting about poor Tony’s noggin, is also sending me into a tizzy.

Anyhow, what a useless braindump of a blog post this was, right? But! Typing out a rambling little blog post gave me something to focus on for a few minutes, so maybe not! I guess it is on to the next thing…!

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