Chapelle's Show has long vanished, leaving a void in the American conversation. Ask a Black Dude. Paul Mooney, "America's Bitterest Comic", used to come on every so often and choke out curmudegonely answers to silly questions. I'm no Paul Mooney, but I'll do my best. I may on occasion ask for guest commentators.
Question #1: Could an Obama Presidency hurt Black Americans? Could an "Obama victory could cause white Americans to ignore entrenched racial divisions while claiming that America has reached the racial Promised Land?"
The truth is, everything we do as Black Americans is really intended to make white America feel better about racism. When we shoot each other and sell each other drugs, that should relieve white guilt. When a black Supreme Court Justice carries water for unreconstructed knuckle-dragging racists and sexist cavemen, that should relieve white guilt. And when a black American beats two Washington insiders to become the leader of the free world, that should relieve white guilt too. That's what we're good at - besides basketball. We also have gigantic penises. Next Question.
Question #2: Did the presumptive Democratic presidential nominee act too presumptively while overseas? Was he acting as if he'd already won? Was he taking airs, overly self-assertive, or assuming a place beyond his station?
There's no reason to beat around the bush here. The word Andrea Mitchell, Fox News, and so many others are placing in the minds of their viewers was first seen in 1880, although variants go back to the 1600's. What word? Let's see, what word do Americans associate with a black man who rises above his given station, past the spot alloted to him by the ruling power structure, exceeding his quota? Could that be...uppity?
So to answer Bill O'Reilly and Andrea Mitchelll, yes, Barack Obama is an uppity Negro. So am I. G's up Ho's down beyotch.