5e: Crossing the Desert

From: Sir Fulhoff of Clan Balderk, Knight of Hawk’s Nest, War Mage
To: Helja and Adrik of Clan Balderk

Dear Mother and Father,

I'm sorry to have left so suddenly and without discussing it with you ahead of time. By Digger's mighty claws, I just could not listen to everyone go on and on about cousin Thorin and his new role as Clan Warden. 

Besides, the magic was calling out to me. I had a vision, or perhaps just a dream, just I had to find out what it was calling me toward. 

But first I had to get there. And no, I wasn't going to just spend my coin. I would hope you'd know me better than that by now. I found a caravan heading across the Scrier Desert. Not much of a caravan, in fact a mere 2 wagons pulled by camels, funded by the laziest gnome I've had the displeasure to encounter who goes by the name of Ragnear. But he'd already assembled a team of guards to keep his caravan safe. 

And I thought the company Thorin assembled was motley. There's Pand, a giant cat with memory problems, a small sneaky goblin named Heddah, an elf called Swallow Greenhorn on some sort of "work/study program", and a human artificer with too many children and an oily personality named Lou Saperstein.

Pand the cat was too big to fit on either of the wagons, so took the lead as we crossed the bridge separating the village from the desert gorges that would mark the first third of the trip. The Heddah and Swallow were in the first wagon with the gnome, and I was stuck with Lou... who talked too much even for a human. 

It wasn't too long before I noticed that the tracks of the camels and the wagons were quickly swallowed by the sands... It wasn't a magical effect that I could tell, but it also wasn't natural. And then they appeared, dust devils. 

The battle was joined, such as it was. Being in the rear wagon meant I missed most of the action, but the cat seemed to do alright, drawing a pair of swords from... I don't actually know where it was keeping them. I managed to slow one down with a ray of frost, but that was my only contribution to the fight. Lou managed to shoot himself in the lip with his crossbow. 

Some hours later, as the sun was hidden by the tall walls of the gorges, we were set upon by a pair of Yuan-Ti, an abomination and a pitmaster. Again, Pand was up front and was surprised, but recovered quickly, laying into the abomination. From my vantage point, it looked like the elf and the goblin went at the smaller but more disturbing pitmaster. Once again, being at the back meant I couldn't bring my hammer to the fight, but my magic did it's job. I cast Hideous Laughter on the pitmaster, which had it rolling in the sand. Lou, somehow useful, hasted Pand. I'm not sure I ever want to see a plushy 7 foot tall hasted cat ever again. Somehow the spell manifested in a rainbow flowing from it!

Hasted, Pand had dropped the swords in favor of a pair of flails. Again, I don't know where the flails were being kept. I did ask later and the answer it gave me was "hammerspace" which was blisteringly unhelpful. The abomination morphed into a giant snake and tried to bite the plushy cat, failed, and coiled around the elf who had gotten too close.

Heddah (the widdle gobwin as she insists on referring to herself as) shanked the pitmaster as he rolled. He stopped rolling after that, freeing up my focus. I cast Vitriolic Sphere on the snake's head. The acid wasn't as effective as I'd hoped, but I could still see it burning the monster. Pand grabbed it by the tail, and whipped it hard enough to release Swallow, who then promptly ran back at the snake and delivered a mighty blow against the scaled monster. So mighty that the snake didn't notice, and Swallow sprained his wrist. 

I must say, in my experience, the Eldar Arcanus may have mighty magic, but their failure to properly cultivate physical endurance and strength, not to mention a certain wisdom to recognize that failure... Dwarven mage-smiths and battle-wizards may be fewer in number but are truly a higher quality.

Lou, while still maintaining the haste, shoots off a pair of bolts. One hit. He calls himself a sharp-shooter, but... 

Don't tell Thorin, but I miss him and the rest of the company. 

I toss a lightning bolt at the snake's face (incidentally causing Pan's already poofy body to poof more), and then Heddah runs up the snake's body and slits it's throat. It thrashes and falls to the sand twitching, blood soaking into the dry earth as fast as it can flow from the creature's body. 

Taking a bit to search around, we found the yuan-ti's stash. Then we get back on the wagons and keep on till we reach what the gnome called "the second arena."

 

---

 

A big thank you to my new neighbor Vicky for DMing, and for inviting me to join her and her friends, and for giving me a chance to play Fulhoff again! Can't wait for next session.

Meeting the Neighbors

I think last night might be my most memorable introduction of myself. I was painting after getting the boy down to bed, and I heard the new downstairs neighbors out on the patio having a dinner party. No biggie. A little bit later the tone of the chatter changed, and something caught my ear. Someone was doing a voice. I stepped out onto my balcony and looked down. The food was all put away, and everyone had their screens out. I couldn't make out most of what was being said, but then...

 

"Make a sleight of hands check" followed by the clatter of dice.

They were playing D&D!

I went inside, and dithered a moment about how to get their attention. I grabbed a d20 and went back out on the balcony. When there was a lull, I said "Hi neighbors" and tossed the d20 down toward them.

Down 3 stories toward them.

"What the.... Did he just toss a dice down?"

"Yeah, and it's a nat 20!"  (I swear to all the gods I'm not making this up)

"Hey, you play D&D?!?"

"Yeah I do!" I replied.

"Can he join us? Do you want to come play?"

 Obviously, I could, and did. And that's how I met my new neighbors and their friends last night.

 

Bonus, I got to pull out my old dwarf wizard Fulhoff! His newest adventure will be tomorrow's post.

5e: Fall of the House of Durst

I wasn't able to attend the last session of the first chapter of the Curse of Strahd, but one of my fellow players gave me the bullet points.

• Hani's wizard had a strange dream while unconscious that the house was smoking and burning
• The sprite (worse for wear) re-appeared and woke up Hani's wizard, who then managed to sneak away to a shadowy corner of the altar room unnoticed.
• Tener's dwarf continued to stall Elizabeth, who LOVES to hear herself talk.
• I snuck upstairs through the trapdoor to the front door and made a big racket with Thaumaturgy to get some of the monsters out of the altar room. I was ignored. But I noticed that things were feeling very spooky and vengeful upstairs.
• Andrew and I met back in the jail room. Where we ran into the orb of light (the dead sprite). The orb lead us to the altar room, where we lurked and watched still more talking from Elizabeth.
• In another attempt to stir the pot and troll the Dursts, I used my last spell to disguise myself as THE DEAD NURSEMAID who Mr. Durst knocked up and Elizabeth killed. I made a big entrance and started yelling at them in Infernal about where my baby was. That DID cause a reaction. Mr. Durst AKA the Ghast fell for it and started getting very agitated. Elizabeth did not fall for it, but her head spun around and she started monologuing angrily at me. I also tried to turn undead to thin out the herd a little. That didn't work.
• While they were yelling at me, the others snuck away from the undead and regrouped in a corner.
• Elizabeth started yelling that she needed a blood sacrifice from one of us on the creepy altar or no one was leaving.
• Elizabeth started stretching out and looking generally weird and creepy
• Weird sulfur smell started filling the room.
• Someone (I can't remember who) noticed that the Elizabeth-thing was actually blind (which was why my disguise didn't fool her)
• I started using Thaumaturgy to throw my voice around the room, further distracting Elizabeth - who was controlling all the monsters.
• Elizabeth looks even creepier. Room smells more like sulfur.
• None of us can figure out the sacrifice thing. I'm sorry to say we did briefly consider the sprite before snapping out of it.
• In a Hail Mary move, I throw the dead nurse's locket (which we found upstairs) to the Durst-Ghast. Thank you for not making me roll for that, Diana. Remember that Elizabeth stabbed the nurse AKA Durst's latest girlfriend to death. Durst-Ghast loses it and starts attacking Elizabeth.
• Elizabeth starts melting into a horrible slime monster as they duke it out.
• We run like hell.
• When we get back upstairs to the den, we find that the ghosts of Elizabeth's victims have animated all of Durst's animal trophies, insect collections, and furniture into a huge angry SOMETHING that is dead set on kicking Durst ass.
• Slime monster Elizabeth erupts through the trapdoor and casts hold person on everyone except Hani.
• The ghosts continue to tear up the house and incorporate the wreckage into their house-monster.
• Hani runs to the door - the killer fog is gone and we can see some houses in the (not killer) mist.
• Hani desperately drags the rest of us out of the house one by one.
• The Elizabeth slime monster starts crawling up Tener's leg and dissolving it.
• Going out in a blaze of glory, Tener headbutts Elizabeth (thus having his face melt off while maintaining a sarcastic smirk of defiance)
• The house monster starts to pound Elizabeth in a battle royale not fit for low level characters.
• From just outside the front steps, we watch as the house implodes, totally destroying Elizabeth and everything inside it. The sprite orb does make it out - seeming having been the ringleader for the ghost vengeance revolt.
• The cellar door opens and you climb out, having finally rouge-ed your way out of the basement. WHERE WERE YOU GUYS?!
• Creepy ravens are in the trees, mocking our terror and general poor-ass condition.
• A creepy (but strangely extremely helpful) lady appears from amongst the ravens and leads us to a caravan of wagons where we can rest
• We collapse
• Apparently somewhere in Barovia Strahd is slow-clapping our hijinks
• The end

Looking forward to seeing what tonight brings...

Strahd: House of Durst, Dust, and Death...

Have you ever had a sprite stab you in the chest? Has that ever been the best thing that’s happened to you that day?

I do not understand these people. They have this amazing house. They’re clearly rich, but completely off their rockers. Resting up a bit, we headed back down into the basement, and back to the bone room. Some weird worm thing with these tentacles was in the closet. It’s tentacles were all sorts of tingly, and not in the good way. They made Vetsun have the shakes. Well, it might have been the getting smacked against the wall that did it, but I think it was the tingly tentacles. Also the smell… How can anything alive smell that foul? It was like the slaughter house on a hot summer day.

Moving deeper we came to a… theater? There was a really cheap statue that Ember said was probably Strahd, based on a window that only he saw in a vision….. We could also hear rats diggin in the walls.

We’ve gotta get out of here.

But the statue was holding an orb… And, well… We took it, and broke the statue. It was just cheap wood scraps and plaster anyway… The candles flared and suddenly our shadows were after us. We ran… but you can’t out run a shadow, not really. We booked it up the stairs, all the way to the 4th floor… and there wasn’t a door at the top. Just a solid brick wall… and then they were on us. I’ve never felt so cold or so scared. They just reached into me and… then it was all black.

That’s where Vetsun stabbed me in the chest with a needle. Drained, and hurt we caught our breath, looked for a way through the wall, and then slowly headed back down… Maybe we can find a way out. I’m so tired. My arms feel like wet pasta. Even holding the torch takes more effort than I can describe. The scratching in the walls was louder, and as we got back to the theater, the dirt walls crumbled open and hungry corpses covered in dirt crawled out of the mess…

Lady, you sent us here… is there no hope?

Strahd: Haunted House of Durst

The private thoughts of Zaadia as she finds herself trapped in a haunted house...

Durst Family Mansion

Where the fuck are we?

Yes, haunted house in the middle of nowhere. Got that part. But those mountains over there? They don’t belong there. And where is “Barovia”? And dead kids? And dead pregnant nannies?



This place is seriously messed up. We made it upstairs, and things just got worse and worse. The haunted armor? Sure. The master bedroom with the haunted tiger skin rug? Wasn’t really creepy until we discovered the display case of murder and torture memorabilia in direct line of sight of the bed. That was fucking haunted too.

Most of the time I don’t care what people do in bed together. Or on a tiger skin rug… I know they never washed it. I just know it…

Then we got to meet one of the nannies. Dead of course. And her baby? A bundle of ratty old rags. And her desiccated body was locked out on the balcony.

Bathroom? Haunted, and the dwarf got the shits. Even better was the belladonna, rue, and juniper in the medicine cabinet. Of fucking course there was.

Then one of the ghosts possessed Ember when we tried to go upstairs. I DID NOT SIGN UP FOR THIS. She said it was bad and we shouldn’t go up there.

Kid, I am with you 100%, but we’re all stuck here, maybe FOREVER if we don’t. And I don’t even know where here IS.

The kid was right, it was bad. They were locked in their room until they starved to death. And across the hall? The old storage room where a chunk of the wall and ceiling were missing? Amazingly free of fog. I guess the haunted house at least is keeping that out… and a good thing, as there was a broken window in Gustav's studio, where the creepy paintings of the dead nursemaids sat.

And the broken window? Haunted. Honestly, I was more shocked it wasn’t one (or all) of the paintings. But hey! We found the servant's stairs down to the basement and the family crypt. Ember put the kids bones to rest, and they just kinda… faded out. Checking the crypt of Elizabeth just revealed bugs. I hate bugs. Way too many legs.

Further along and down some more stairs was a weird room… lots of bones, both on the table and all over the floor. And a makeshift altar. We headed back upstairs to decide what to do… I really hope nothing crawls out of the walls… or if it does it brings back my rapier.

Strahd: An Unkindness of Ravens

I thought we’d come to an agreement. I leave you alone, you leave me alone. I get it, being raised in a temple, there’s a certain bit I owe you, and I’ll drop coins in the poor box when I have them, but I didn’t want to get involved, you see? With any of it. There’s life to live, to enjoy! And you, all of you, have PLANS and SCHEMES and I don’t want any part of that.

And I grumbled when you gave Ember his holy moment, but at least it wasn’t me. We grew up together, and I thought we’d gotten out together, but no…

The warrant was totally not my fault. Okay, I know the bone wasn’t actually a relic, that’s why I had to fake the provenance papers, but it isn’t like you can actually find the mad archmage’s remains, and it didn’t hurt anybody. How did I know they wanted to resurrect him? So we made ourselves scarce and out of town. The harvest festival was great, I hope you enjoyed all the offerings.

But then, the way back to town (I really hope things have cooled off, I’m tired of being out in the middle of hicksville) we somehow ended up with a couple of paladins too? Subtle. Real subtle.

Then the flash flood, the ravens, the lady in black who gave me these shiney boots?

Come on… Nothing good was going to come from that.

Well, okay, the dwarf falling into the river was funny.

And aside from the boots, I also really appreciated the directions to the dry cabin not too far away, but a heads up about those dusty crab things would have been nice. And yes, I won’t deny that the paladins were helpful, but so was the ranger! Not everything has to revolve around you all! And it wasn’t like I wasn’t holding my own.

Really, they probably couldn’t have handled it without me. And Karl didn’t seem to mind my dagger in his back. I had dust in my eyes. I didn’t do it because he’s a paladin or anything.

Honest! A little credit please.

Anyway, I’m finally dry so I’m going to bed.

…

These boots came from a dead lady, didn’t they? Seriously, you gods are the worst.

5e: Frosty's Harsh Winter

Frosty's Harsh Winter is a 5e adventure scaled for a party of 8th-9th level characters.

I was inspired by a Frosty the Snowman is a Lich article I saw, and then I rewatched the original cartoon movie, and things just spiraled out of control from there.

I ran it a few weeks ago for my local group, and they had a blast. Sadly I didn't take any pictures, but I hope this one will be a little inspiring, and helpful in running it.

Merry Christmas!

5e: Doom of the Desert

From: Sir Fulhoff of Clan Balderk, Knight of Hawk’s Nest, War Mage
To: Helja and Adrik of Clan Balderk

Mother and Father:

Aside from the holes in the ground, there were a trio of stairs heading down from the amphitheater under the sand and stone surface. Knowing we didn’t have time for a rest, we downed some healing potions, squared our shoulders, and headed down to face the dragon in her lair.

The disturbingly tight quarters were littered with sand mounds making moving a chore, and the sound of chanting coming off from one of the passages heralded something unpleasant. Turning a tight corner, we spotted some Yuan-Ti performing a ritual, and as we watched one promptly tossed itself into a hole. Abyssal voices echoed out of the hole. Knowing that there was absolutely nothing good to come from that, I used one of my precious spells and invoked a Carpet of Radiant Light right over the hole. It neatly divided the room in half, with the cultists primarily on one side and us on the other.

Unfortunately, from our limited point of view, we didn’t see all of the other cultists that were on our side of the Wall of Light. And again, because of the tight quarters, it was difficult to get everyone through the archway in any sort of order or speed. So while Hilda was hacking away at the cultists (and spotting Harshnag tied up), we were all poorly positioned when Iymrith burrowed her head out of the sandstone walls and let loose a lightning bolt that puts any I’ve ever cast to shame. The static energy of it all also blew the sand up, temporarily blinding us.



Thorin, having been stuck in the back, avoided both the sand and the lightning bolt, and shot his crossbow past those of us wiping our eyes, and Bran who had become encased in ice. The bolt flew true, striking Iymrith in the snout. King Hekaton broke off a chunk of the wall and threw it into Iymrith’s face. The stone shattered on her head, and she roared in annoyance. I used the power of the wall to blast her, the radiance blasting her scales. Her majesty and power washed through the chamber like a wave, and we realized the danger we were in. She then slipped back unto the sandy walls and out of sight. The shortened carpet of light opened a path for the cultists to slip through, but Aramil hypnotized them, and they stood dumbly watching the fight.

Hilda was slowly chopping her way through the snakemen, slipping in the sand as she tried to position herself to keep them from slipping away. Bran reached into his bag and tossed a wild boar into the sand, and then ordered it to help Hilda. Harshnag finally had broken out of his binds, and got to his feet. Joda ran up along the walls, kicking cultists as he went. The wall burst open and Joda avoided getting snapped in half. Unfortunately his blows went wide, but Harshnag made up for it, coming around the corner swinging his ax, and biting deep into her shoulder.



Hoping that they could handle it, I tossed a fireball into the corner where Iymrith was battling Joda and Harshnag. They all took it, and no one looked happy about it. “Sorry!” I called lamely as Iymrith again burrowed away.

Thorin, feeling the fear of the dragon, kept out of the corner, but picked a large mound of sand that mostly filled another doorway to give him a clear view of the battle. It also gave him a view of a pile of treasure. Rin, eyes still watering from the sand stumbled toward Thorin’s exclamation of “Treasure!” He crested the mound, and then slipped down the other side, disturbing the treasure’s guardians, air elementals! The coin laiden whirlwinds slammed into Thorin and Rin, buffeting them both. And then Iymrith burst out of the wall, and launched herself at Thorin! Bleeding and bloody from the elementals already, he was clawed and knocked to the ground. Iymrith then hopped over to do the same to Rin.



That she didn’t wait to make sure Thorin was dead is pure luck…

The cultists were finally cut down, and Hilda decided to toss the bag of beans she’s acquired a while back into the abyssal hole. Not the choice I’d have made. I dismissed the carpet of light, and cast mirror image on myself, running toward the sand mound blocking my line of sight. Heckaton cut me off, practically running through the pile of sand, shoving past Thorin, Rin, and the elementals right up into Iymrith’s face. The beans apparently found something worth growing in, and the crown of a great fruit tree popped out of the hole, the trunk basically filling it. Among the branches were a couple dozen large schnozberries.

Cresting what was left of the mound, I caught sight of the dragon, and caused a blast of Synaptic Static to wash over her and one of the elementals. I’m thankful I didn’t have to drop it on the King of the Giants… She spasmed, then shook off the effect, snarled at me, and began to summon an ice storm. Reacting as best I could I countered her spell… only just. Even still, a coating of rime ice formed over my hands. Hekaton used her distraction to hack into her.



Thorin somehow managed to get a second wind, and attacked the air elemental that whirled around him, sending coins flying. Rin, finally getting the sand out of his eyes did the same. Iymrith didn’t stick around to let Hekaton carve her up. She teleported away, and I couldn’t stop her.

Amazingly, she teleported back into the other chamber! She appeared next to Hilda (who had suddenly grown younger) as she was just wiping the juice of the schnozberry from her lips. Dropping the fruit, she flung her blade out at the dragon while Harshnag threw a stone at her. Bran’s shadow weapon stretched out into a hunting pike and he charged right into Iymrith, the shadow sinking in deep.



The shock and anguish of her death howl quickly wheezed out as her lungs collapsed, the shadow energy blackening her blue and gold scales. She tried to grasp at the shadow weapon, but her claw just passed through it as she collapsed to the ground.

Hours later, after we’d passed around the healing potions, dug up the bulk of her hidden treasure, and shared hugs and nervous laughs, King Hekaton teleported us back to the Maelstrom.

Being feasted in honor by the entire court of the giants is something I’m sure Aramil will write songs about, if not an entire epic saga… I’ll make sure he sends a copy to the clan.

But I feel… Melancholy. My urge to celebrate wa quickly sated, and now I long to again walk the halls of our clan steading. I’m going to ask King Hekaton to send Thorin and I home. Well, once I can get Thorin and Aramil to stop collaborating… I’ll have to leave again when everyone decides they’re ready to again face Old Snarl. We do not want him coming to find us, but I think it is not an *urgent* task.

Tell aunt and uncle their son is coming home safe, famous, and rich. They’ll appreciate that. Oh, and your son is also coming home safe and rich, if less famous. See you soon.

5e: Lawn Ornaments?!?

From: Sir Fulhoff of Clan Balderk, Knight of Hawk’s Nest, War Mage
To: Helja and Adrik of Clan Balderk

Mother and Father:

The maelstrom is an amazing place, and we’ve spent our time here taking advantage of that fact. I’ve poured over the Archmage Dangledork’s spellbook. For someone of his skills, the contents are rather pedestrian. It’s no shock that he was so poorly able to handle our assault. Nevertheless, I’ll be able to make use of it.

Joda took advantage of the walls of water surrounding the palace to work out in the morning. He literally ran around the palace on the walls of water. It was such a feat that the giants of the palace took the time to watch, gathering in the spots with the best views and snacked on popcorn lobster.

Taking advantage of this, Hilda visited King Hekaton. Only because of her help in freeing him did he allow her to approach and talk with him. She spoke slowly, carefully, knowing that she was treading on dangerous ground. She spoke of his daughters, and of her own experience as one of many siblings, and the loneliness that can happen even when surrounded by those they love. She advised the king to ensure that his daughters know that they’re all loved equally. The king was touched by her words, and promised that he would keep them in his mind going forward.

But first, there is the dragon to deal with. We gathered together in the meditation chamber. The king told us his allies would be arriving at the desert lair of Iymrith from a variety of locations, and by a variety of means. We would be teleporting in directly. He activated the chamber, and we were suddenly being baked by the heat of the dry sun, rather than cooled by the watery light.

The amphitheater was ruined, and covered in statues. Statues that it turned out were all animated. “I can’t believe we have to fight her lawn ornaments” Hilda lamented, drawing her sword, and quaffing the potion of giant size. The rest of the party followed, except for Aramil, and grew between 14-18 feet tall.



Joda ran up the side wall of the seating area. Thorin tried to follow, using Bran’s back as a stepping stone. That was about the point we noticed the trebuchet. The stones started flying toward the king, and he launched a lightning strike at the first one, wiping out the stone crew. Almost everyone piled into the fight. Aramil and I circled around to help flank. Bran tossed ice storms while I kept my spells in reserve, working my hammer more than my magic.

Around the time we’d cut though the first half of the gargoyles, 2 larger stone figures arrived, followed by a distinctive sound… the roar of a dragon, and the flapping of her wings. Iymrith. Her terrifying presence was felt across the amphitheater. I took faith in the Great Digger, knowing she’d sent me on this quest, and it was time to see it to the end.



King Hecaton, at the front of the fight took the first hit from her, as she flew past, tail lashing out. Her wings kicked up a great blast of sand, blinding most of those in the path. I used, and used up, the wand of magic missiles, dumping each and every charge into her wings. The wand crumbled in my hands as the magic was spent. Iymrith flew off, leaving her golems to finish us off. Beyond the amphitheater a spray of sand showed where she’d burrowed into the ground.

Leaping down from the amphitheater seats, I swung my hammer repeatedly into the back of the golem slamming into the king, drawing off its attention. Thorin, further up, was dealing with the gargoyles operating the trebuchet. Hack, slash, shove, hack, slash, shove…

We dropped the golems, and took a moment to wipe the sweat from our brows. Mere moments had passed since we’d arrived, but our blood stained the sands. Below us, Iymrith’s lair awaited… and we could hear her rumbling below…

5e: When the boat's a rockin!

From: Sir Fulhoff of Clan Balderk, Knight of Hawk’s Nest, War Mage
To: Helja and Adrik of Clan Balderk

Mother and Father:

The storm continues to blow around the stern of the ship, while Bran and I watch from the crow’s nest.

Hilda and Joda both continue to cut down the cultists, while Rin chops up another merrow. Bran shoots the half orc mate, while Captain Dangledork the archmage flies up and out of the storm I had blowing. The I called the lightning from the storm to hit him, and then hit him with a lightning bolt of my own. He was staggered, but still standing (flying), and now he knew where the wizard was. My second lightning bolt however continued past the archmage, hitting one of the chains, breaking it, and then through the hull of the ship… cracking it. Two of the cultists fired the mounted ballistas at Aramil. He just dodged the first, and almost was skewered by the second, saved only by Rin’s ancestors.

Continuing to slay cultists, Hilda and Joda dance around each other. Rin hurts, but doesn’t quite slay the next merrow. Bran, having a clear shot at the archmage, takes it, and the black bolt seems to catch him unexpectedly. He blinks in confusion, and falls from the sky, hitting the deck with a bone crunching splat. Bran’s second shot slays the next merrow harassing Rin.



Seeing the archmage drop to the deck breaks the half orc’s nerve, and he rushes into one of the cabins.

Using the storms lightning, I again strike at the chains enchanting the king, and then fly down from the crows next to the cabin the mate entered. He was already ransacking the room. I told him to leave the spellbook, surrender and order the crew to stand down, and I’d let him live. He wanted the spellbook for himself, but his sense of self preservation won out.

Having cleared enough of the cultists, Hilda breaks the remaining two chains while Jode keeps the rest off of her back. The Storm King sucks in a deep breath, and begins to stir. The half orc mate steps out of the cabin, and orders the crew to stand down. The merrow don’t listen, so Rin kills another. The last one decides it would rather live far away than swim in the waters with his dead friends. Bran slides down a rope from the crow’s nest, shooting at the merrow swimming away. Aramil and Joda both lay some healing magic on the Storm King.

Sitting up, his first act is to try to swat the mate. We convince him to let him live, so the King tosses him overboard. The King is suspicious, somewhat confused, but we tell him we were sent by his daughter Seresa to save him. He doesn’t entirely believe us, but showing off the conch shell he’s at least willing to hold off on just wiping us all out. I have the opportunity to search the wizards quarters, and do find the spellbook, as well as some notes, sea charts, and carved into the woodwork the words “Iymrith” “Sisters” Treachery”

Blowing the conch shell, we’re teleported back to the Storm King’s Palace in the Maelstrom. His daughters are delighted and amazed, and he calls a family meeting in the throne room… but the throne is gone. Iymrith has stolen it. The Storm King was astounded, astonished, and amazed at all that had happened, and how foolish he’d been. “She didn’t even change her name!”

After some debate about what to do next, and catching the Storm King up on all that had happened, it was decided that Iymrith needed to be taken care of first. He sent out a call for giants to come to him, and we scryed to discover what we could. Iymrith was upon the throne in a ruined palace in the desert. The ship the king had been imprisoned on was destroyed, and the kraken was in inky black water.

I spent my time again studying magic, while the rest of the party continued to explore the palace. In a few days we were ready to make the assault on Iymrith.

5e: Death From Above!

From: Sir Fulhoff of Clan Balderk, Knight of Hawk’s Nest, War Mage
To: Helja and Adrik of Clan Balderk

Mother and Father:

Heading out of Yartar, we discuss what our strategy is going to be, and most of the party wants to head up to Old Snarl to pay our respects, and maybe get a little more help. For my part, dealing with dragons is never a good idea. Dealing with an ancient red dragon is an even worse idea, but we did agree, as part of our use of the airship, that we would visit.

If you’ve heard stories of Klauth, then you’ve heard that he is not only ancient, but bigger than maybe any other dragon on Faerun? The tales do not begin to even come close to accurately portraying the sheer power and awesome majesty of that being. Also the annoyance that we had not yet completed our quest. I think what kept us from becoming a snack was that we did at least have some information that he didn’t have, namely that Imyrith is working with Slarkrethel. That seemed to intrigue him. His advice was simply “don’t die.”

Departing Klauth’s domain, we headed for Waterdeep, resupplied and stocked up on things we thought would be helpful for a sea battle. Our efforts to find out more about the Kraken Society and their activities were ineffective, but the one bit of luck turned out to be the journal we’d taken from Lord Drylund. While we’d had no luck deciphering the code, a contact of the Grey Hand was able to figure some of it out, including the phrase “purple islands.” We’d heard that name before, and checking through our assorted goods in the bag of holding, pulled out an old map of them. Since we were in Waterdeep, we contacted a local cartographer and acquired a more up to date chart. This in hand, we set off.

The flight out from Waterdeep was cool, cloudy, and wet. Thankfully it was a calm sort of wet, but bone chilling. On the 4th day out, we spotted the islands… and then we saw it, the Morkoth. Distinctively squid shaped with an open hold containing a chain bound storm giant. Thankfully our arrival by air meant we hadn’t been spotted. We followed the Morkoth from above, spying on it for the rest of the day, the night, and in the first light of day, dropped down upon them.

Joda summoned a cloud from the Astorian Fan, and we dropped down to the ship. Bran and I hopped off at the crows nest, startling a sleeping watchman, and silencing him before he could make a sound. I then summoned a storm over the stern of the ship, while Hilda dropped down into the bow swinging her sword at the sailors there. Joda leaps down onto the giant and inspects the chains. Aramil tries to dispel the magic on the chains, but their enchantments are too strong. Joda fails to break any of them.



Finally shaking off the shock of the assault, the sailors retaliate. The commanding officer shoots at Joda with a crossbow, but Joda catches the bolt, and throws it back at the half orc. Hilda and Rin are swarmed by sailors, but they’re mostly irritating rather than dangerous. Rin tosses a few of them overboard. From the storm, I lightning bolt the crossbow wielding half orc, who is now joined by a spellcaster. I counterspell the invulnerability spell he was trying to cast, and then drop an acid sphere on the stern. The wizard goes invisible….

5e: Kraken Heads in Yartar

From: Sir Fulhoff of Clan Balderk, Knight of Hawk’s Nest, War Mage
To: Helja and Adrik of Clan Balderk

Mother and Father:

On the way to Yartar we discussed what it was we wanted to accomplish. Our main objective was to get information: find out who killed the Giant Queen (and why) and what happened to the Giant King. Amazingly this is when the rest of the party thought a night raid was the plan to go with.

A night raid… onto a casino barge… full of the rich and powerful of Yartar… I pointed out the flaws of this plan, and managed to talk them out of it. We were then rudely interrupted by some random woman who strolled into the cabin who initially introduced herself as Phyllis, then later as Laura?

One downside to having become famous is that we’ve started attracting fanbois and girls. I worry that this might be letting our enemies know what we’re up to, but thankfully the bards are getting it so mixed up that it’ll be hard for them to get coherent info out of the stories.

Another downside is that our fans are just as misinformed. Druid-girl was completely focused on burning down the barge and then swimming away with Lord Drylund that we had to sit her in the corner and tell her to shut up or we’d toss her overboard. Which is honestly not much of a threat to someone who can turn into a bird….

Arriving in Yartar with a fair amount of fanfair (flying ships tend to attract a bit of attention), we split up to see what we could see…

Aramil got in with the local musicians, and got himself booked on the Golden Goose after sharing more stories of our travels. As usual Thorin was the hero of the stories.

Joda and Hilda visited Bidet at the Winking Clam, ‘hideout’ of the Hand of Yartar. They learned a bit more info about Lord Drylund and Pau Ming, but little we hadn’t guessed already. Then they went shopping Hilda ended up the fanciest dressed Barbarian ever! Complete with expensive and gaudy jewelry.

Meanwhile I went about town in my gaudiest outfit, splashing petty magic and coin around with abandon. The best way to get someone’s attention is to be obvious about it. Especially when that person craves money and power… I also bought and used some very expensive incense to cast Legend Lore seeking info about “Lord Usland” who was Lady Italia’s contact person… and the spell provided only a single lyric, being sung by Aramil “And Thorin Slayed the Aboleth…”

….

Aramil’s stint on the boat was mostly a success. He managed to get the attention of Pau Ming, but his performance of “I’m on a boat” was an even bigger hit that “The Thorin Chronicles.” Oh, and the druid did some sneaking about, and discovered that Lord Drylund has a pet octopus named Squishy and a headache problem. Thankfully he didn’t burn the boat down while everyone was on it.

The next day I sent an embossed invitation for Lord Drylund to visit our skyship at his convenience. It wasn’t even 2 hours before he was on the pier. While providing a tour, we took flight, so as to provide the best view of Yartar. It also had the advantage of removing him from his guards and his pet wizard. We confronted him with the coin found on the Giant Queen’s corpse and made it clear that he had one chance to fess up. The druid tried to summon a thunderstorm, but I countered her interruption. She stormed out of the cabin in a huff, and summoned it anyway. She then dropped a lightning bolt next to his ship, and then one onto the mast. He explained that he was a member of the Kraken society, and they killed the queen and kidnapped the king and had him on a ship in the trackless sea named the Morkoth. Sadly that was all we got out of him, as his eyes bulged and he started to foam at the mouth. I tried to dispel whatever was affecting him, while Joda tried some healing magic. Whatever curse was upon him was beyond our magics, and he collapsed dead to the deck.

Deciding to make the best of a bad situation, Bran used the hat of disguise to make himself appear as Lord Drylund, even going so far as to don his shoes! We returned to the river and “Lord Drylund” stormed off our ship and onto the Golden Goose…. Where he was promptly stuck by a bolt of lightning that left behind only a pair of shoes!

Bran safely Thunder stepped back onto our ship, and cast Speak with Dead on the corpse. Bran asked him about the cypher for the journal we stole last time, but he was uncooperative about how to break it. We asked about Lady Italia, but he dismissed her as being of little importance. We then asked about the name “Slarkrethel” which is apparently the name of the Kraken who founded the society. Bran lops off Lord Drylund’s head, and drops it in a pickle jar, while we feed the body to the fire elemental.

I burned another several sticks of incense and cast Legend Lore, hoping for a better result than my previous attempt! It was certainly more informative. This ancient beast is also a powerful wizard, the Chosen of Umberlee (the Bitch Queen Sea Goddess herself), founder of the Kraken Society, and seeking a path to godhood, and lairs in some great ruined city somewhere under the trackless sea.

Because of course it does…

We pay our respects to the Waterbaron, and then depart Yartar, never again to return to its cursed riverbanks (until the next time we return), and set sail for Waterdeep, leaving the fangirl druid to hunt around for Lady Italia in Yartar’s sewers. 

---

Current Quests
Find the Storm Giant King aboard the Morkoth on the Trackless Sea
Iymrith the Ancient
Slarkrethel & the Kraken Society

Loose Threads
Jeff the guard, abandoned in Everland
Old Gnawbone - wishes she could transform into an elf
Eraglass the Sage - Missing?
Old Snarl

Completed Quests:
Yartar (yet again) - Lord Dryland (deceased, head pickled)
Coup in the Court of the Hill Giants
Eye of the Allfather in the Valley of Kadroon
Find Harshnag
Highdale/Westfelds necromatic curse - Mountaintop Crypt
The Silver Hook adventuring party
Mt. Black
HawksNest Payroll
Zymorvan Giantslayer (Yartar…. again)
Aboleth of Yartar
Defended Goldenfields
Well of Victory
Orcs of the Ardeep Forest
Nightstone (again)
Tomb of Darshin Hammerheart
Grey Hand
Zathros Zethros, Cloud Giant
Nightstone

Wyrm in the Apple of the Alfather's Eye

From: Sir Fulhoff of Clan Balderk, Knight of Hawk’s Nest, War Mage
To: Helja and Adrik of Clan Balderk

Mother and Father:

Standing at the entrance to the court, with Princess Saresa before us, flanked by her advisors was… intimidating. Even from as far away as we were, it was an imposing sight. The Dragonskull Throne’s black obsidian form perched atop the skulls of the blue dragons, all hovering just slightly above the pearlescent floor… I never honestly expected to see the ancient dwarven throne. Princess Seresa seemed oddly delighted at our entrance, much to the consternation of her advisors who warned her that it was likely “little folk” who were involved, if not RESPONSIBLE for her mother’s murder and her father’s disappearance!

Bran surveyed the room, and saw something, and silently signaled that it was the female advisor, but what about her we would learn later…

At the female advisor’s warning I chimed in dryly with “Oh, yes. We murdered your mother, and kidnapped your father.” Thankfully the sarcasm was not lost on her, but she did try to suggest that it hid a more nefarious truth. Princess Seresa was having none of it, and listened to Bran as he explained why were had come. She called us closer to the throne, and then showed us something that she hadn’t even shown to her advisors… a wooden coin, painted gold, with a goose on it. A chit from the casino in Yartar. They objected to her giving it to us, but she ignored them, asking us to accept her quest, to find her father.

Of course we accepted. One does not ignore the instructions of a god…

The princess then told us of the meditation chamber where she could send us anywhere we wanted. At that point Bran pointed out that we’d not yet been informed of her advisors names. The male was her uncle, and the female was Imryth.

“Funny, that’s the name of the blue dragon that attacked us at the Eye of the Alfather” Aramil laughed nervously.

“That’s because she *is* that dragon.” Bran said remarkably calmly.

The next few moments were a bit confused as you might expect, but Imryth grabbed something from around the princess’ neck, and started to run off. I threw up a wall of light to block her path, which only made her pause. She snarled at me, and teleported away.

Dismissing the blindingly bright wall, we returned to the throne room, suggested that the throne be hidden since Imryth now had one of the keys known to be able to control it. The princess and her uncle were both unnerved by the thought of Imryth taking the throne, and agreed it would be protected. The princess thanked us for revealing the truth, and then offered the hospitality of her palace until we were ready to go look for her father. I think the shock of discovering that someone who she grew up knowing turning out to be an enemy was too much of a shock. Her sisters, on hearing the news, became slightly nicer. Slightly.

The princess then showed us around. I skipped out on the tour after we hit the library, and spent the next 3 days enraptured. Rin was bored, which he expressed often. Aramil was enraptured by the acoustics. Bran apparently spent his time with the princess and her collection of gadgets and gizmos of the “little people” describing what many of them were. Hilda made friends with the Princess’ orca.

There was also a scrying pool. We discovered that Harshnag was safe, and somewhere white and cold. Imryth was in a ruined structure somewhere in the desert, raging at her fortune. Lord Dryland was with his sorceress assistant discussing business on his casino boat.

And one evening, very late… While everyone else was asleep, I checked in on you. With all the traveling I’ve been doing, I know it’s been impossible to get messages to me, and I wanted to make sure all was well.

Dropping this note off with a courier in Goldenfields before we head out to Yartar. Again.

I hope to see you soon. In person.

---

Current Quests:
Find the Storm Giant King
Iymrith the Ancient

Loose Threads:
Jeff the guard, abandoned in Everland
Yartar - Lady Italia, Bat-weirdos (Kella & Zopin), Paw-Ming, Lord Dryland
Old Gnawbone - wishes she could transform into an elf
Eraglass the Sage - Missing?
Fire Giants attacked Tribor and took a rod from the center of town.

Completed Quests:
Coup in the Court of the Hill Giants
Eye of the Allfather in the Valley of Kadroon
Find Harshnag
Highdale/Westfelds necromatic curse - Mountaintop Crypt
The Silver Hook adventuring party
Mt. Black
HawksNest Payroll
Zymorvan Giantslayer
Aboleth of Yartar
Defended Goldenfields
Well of Victory
Orcs of the Ardeep Forest
Nightstone (again)
Tomb of Darshin Hammerheart
Grey Hand
Zathros Zethros, Cloud Giant
Nightstone

5e: Violations of Etiquette

From: Sir Fulhoff of Clan Balderk, Knight of Hawk’s Nest, Battle Mage
To: Helja and Adrik of Clan Balderk

Mother and Father:

While the pigs were probably going to get the job done, Bran makes sure to put Gua out of her misery. We summon Moog & Plak back to the village, free some prisoners who’d been captured by the giants, and take them all back to Goldenfields. With Moog installed as the new queen we’re hoping that things will quiet down.

We spend a couple of days in Goldenfields recovering, and then head to just outside the town to activate the teleportation spell embedded in the conch. The magic of the shell is beyond old, and feels different from any other teleport spell I’ve ever encountered. It deposited us far out under the trackless sea in a coral palace lit from within by bioluminescent life in a myriad of forms. The air was rich with the smell of salt water and the sounds of pipe music and singing from above.

Following the music, which Aramil began to accompany on his lute, we found ourselves witness to a spectacle that is difficult to fully express. A pair of storm giant princesses were performing before an assortment of giant nobility. One was singing, while the other was playing a giant crab, the shell encrusted with coral growths. The whale bone mallets she tapped the crab with caused it to emit the organ sounds, along with tiny sprays of water. It was hauntingly beautiful, and the way the sound carried in the chamber was impossible to put into words. Aramil was in tears.

As the music ended, the princesses addressed us, and the rest of the giants turned their attention our way. They were haughty, and insulting, and dismissed our concerns. Neither was the princess we’d come to see, and we were guarded in what we’d say. While deciding what to do with us, we were sent to a guest room. The guard outside the door was… perhaps more receptive to our words, especially when we mentioned the oricle, and explained that we absolutely had to speak with Princess Seresa. One guard went off with our message...

Princess, Mirin, having intercepted the message, came to escort us to her sister. Or so she said. We found ourselves back in the portal chamber where we’d first materialized, and there were the giant nobles. She left us with them, and ascended the stairs back toward the music room.

“We came to talk, it doesn’t have to come to blows” I cautioned them. They were unreceptive to my words, so I tapped the ground in front of me with the Astorian Gavel of the Venn Rune (aka my Hammer of Justice). A shockwave of power washed over the room, and the giants recognized the danger of attacking, knowing they’d receive a backlash of power. The Jarl Hellenhild the frost giant was impressed at our moxy and cunning, and convinced the rest of the giants to hear us out… at least until the effect of the artifact ended.

We told them a condensed version of what happened with the Eye of the Alfather, Imryth the Blue, and our adventures. The Frost Giant Jarl, in spite of not being a fan of Harshnag, and the Stone Giant Thane Braxal were convinced that we should talk to Princess Seresa. The cloud giant Count Va’Al was on the fence, and Duchess Tartha the fire giantess wanted nothing more than to squish us under her steel clad heel, and she egged on the cloud giant to help her.

Joda took the initiative, lit up, and charged toward the fire giantess. Each step she took pushed her a little higher up in the air with a flash of divine fire from her feet. Her first strike, in the center of the giantess’ breastplate, caved in the armor and knocked the breath out of her. 3 more solid strikes followed that up, concluding with a fiery kick to the giantess’ jaw.

I conjured ropes of ethereal shadow at the Fire Giantess’ feet that coiled around her legs, her weapons, and hands, tightening with the strength of my arcane power.

Hilda charged over to the cloud giant, and knocked him to his knees with 2 clean blows from her sword. Aramil and Bran shot the fire giant. Joda continued to lay into her with fists and feet, divine fire flashing against the flames of the giantess. I tossed a lightning bolt at the cloud giant, who’d stood up and landed a painful blow on Hilda. I envy her ability to take a hit like that and shrug it off. Hilda again knocked the cloud giant down, and threatened to take his family jewels if he got back up.



A couple more arrows, and the squeezing of the ethereal ropes finished off the fire giantess. She didn’t even get off a scream as the ropes had coiled around her neck. The cloud giant, still on his knees, yielded. The frost and storm giants gloated. “We told you not to underestimate them. Come, let’s go see if we can’t get you an audience with the Princess.”

5e: Pigging out on Cake

From: Sir Fulhoff of Clan Balderk, Knight of Hawk’s Nest, Battle Mage
To: Helja and Adrik of Clan Balderk

Mother and Father:

The flight to the hill giant village was mostly uneventful. Bran was remarkably obsessive about keeping track of the ship’s stores, and had noted that there was a slight increase in what was being eaten over what there should have been. I put it up to Thorin’s midnight snacks. Bran thought it might be rats, so he summoned a giant badger from his bag of tricks and sent it hunting. It found a halfling who’d stowed aboard, following Thorin.

We decided that rather than tossing him overboard, we’d let him earn his keep.

Arriving at the village we circled high overhead, and Bran flew down as a crow to check it all out. Goblins, orcs, hobgoblins, ogres, and of course hill giants were all over, as were massive pens of pigs and sheep. Within the main structure was the “throne room” where a massive hill giant presided over her court from atop a splintering wagon. A hobgoblin presented her with a giant artifact. Discussing how to obtain the conch shell we needed, I was strongly in favor of a night time assault from above. The rest of the party was more in favor of a sneak attack… from a cake.



I argued that we could do the sneak attack that night and that we didn’t have a cake. They pointed out that Goldenfields wasn’t that far away…

The bakers in Goldenfields were all too happy to assist in the ridiculous plan.



While the cake baking was in progress, Bran, Aramil and the halfling went out to try to rally the female hill giants banished from the tribe by Gua. They managed to find 3, including Moog, the one we’d met a while back. Of the three, they convinced Moog and Prek to join us. Only having the 2 we decided not to risk their lives trying to fight our way in. The joined us, but only up to about a mile from the village. They’d wait for our signal to come.

I ended up in the cake, along with the halfling, Hilda, and Joda. Bran and Aramil would be the face of the delegation from Goldenfields bringing tribute to Queen Gua. We were stopped at the gate, where the guards sampled the cake and ale we were bringing. Then slowly the carts were brought in to the throneroom, and Bran and Aramil made flowery speeches about the greatness of Gau, and how her immenseness is clearly a sign of divine favor. Using these speeches, they got closer and closer to Gua, and as Aramil switches over to talking about how the giant females miss their husbands, and how Gua is keeping them from each other, Bran Thunder-stepped the two of them up onto the walkway running around the edge of the room.



Even in the cake, we could hear that! I Thunderwaved the cake off of us, caught sight of the obese giant, and charged in. Gua swung at me twice, hitting once. At least I had her attention! Bran and Aramil took out a pair of goblins who were on the walkway with them. Joda flamed on, and flew into Gua’s face feet first, while Hilda jumped up next to me swinging wildly, and sending much of the junk on the cart flying everywhere. She even managed to send a wad of icing into Gua’s eyes, blinding her! The giants and ogres converge on us. Teva spends his time stabbing giants and ogres in their feet from under the carts.

One of Gua’s giant’s hit me from behind, and I decided that since Hilda and Joda had Gua in hand, I’d get out of the way, and flew up toward the ceiling. Aramil rushes back along the walkway, and then cries out to the giants that Gua isn’t divinely favored, and that she’s nothing but a pig… and then he polymorphed her into one. The giants all paused to consider this, though the ogres were unimpressed.



From within one of her many fleshy folds a goblin popped out, and rolled to the ground. The sudden change in weight caused the cart to creek ominously. The pig-Gua charge Hilda, who caught it and pushed it back. The cart continued to creak as the combatants shifted around. Hilda kicked pig-Gua back, and then hacked at the cart with her flaming sword. Teva popped out from under the cake cart to do the same. I launched a Vitriolic Sphere at a trio of ogres were were converging on Bran and Aramil. The cart snapped, and as it hit the floor, the floor below began to crack. Hilda and Teva jumped back, kicking stuff off the cart as they went, including a conch shell! Gua suddenly returned to her obese self, causing the floor to buckle. She (and the cart) began to fall in. I helped by hitting her with a lightning bolt, while Bran lightning bolted 2 ogres, dropping them.

Even the 100’ fall didn’t kill Gua, but she was massively injured, and basically imobile. Maybe the pigs below will finish her off?

It was about this point Thorin and Rin managed to extricate themselves from the ale barrels they'd been hiding in. Somehow they'd ended up in the bottom of the pile. I’m sure the bards will make it sound like Thorin single-handedly slayed the giant queen…

5e: Thorin's Hangover, Fulhoff's Headache

From: Sir Fulhoff of Clan Balderk, Knight of Hawk’s Nest, Battle Mage
To: Helja and Adrik of Clan Balderk

Mother and Father:

Once aboard the skyship and moving away from the Eye at best speed, we had to settle on where to go next. Hilde wanted to swing by the Wyrm tribe and make sure they knew what had happened. Since it was close by, we sailed by, spotting their fortress easily. Not wanting to give them the impression they were under attack, we came in slowly, and Hilde went to speak with them along with Aramil and apparently the tribe was thrilled. Turned out that both the chief and the shaman were intensely disliked. There was a party, which most of us remained on the ship for. Once done, we were on our way back to Mirabar.

Again, wanting to avoid upsetting anyone, I flew down to check in with the city guard. Once they saw who was arriving in a sky ship, they were surprised, but not shocked. We were directed to land in a specific park, at which point we were all but mobbed. Apparently we’ve managed to become minor celebrities.

This is sadly where our tale goes off the rails. Our dear Thorin decided that while we were in town among all of the adoring fans, that he should gracefully accept every drink, offer, and attention that was sent his way. In addition to dropping a small fortune buying other people drinks, clothing, and gods know what else, he managed to lose his sword, his armor, and even his clothing. He was also involved in some sort of fertility ritual. He turned up wrapped in a fresh lambskin stinking of blood, sex, and drink with little memory of what happened.

I have to give credit to our celebrity for one thing - it made the finding and retrieval of Thorin’s arms and armor easier. People seemed disinclined to immediately try to sell them off to the highest bidder. Still cost many a pretty platinum piece to get it all back. It might have been mean of me, but I made him come collect all his things wearing only the lambskin… I’m not sure that was as effective as it might have been. He seems to have no shame. I'm going to refrain from sharing some of the details.

Trust me, you don't want to know.

We collectively decided that we needed to get back to it, and so we took off shortly there after, heading south toward the hill giant village. Or at least where we think it is. We’ll find out soon.

---

Outstanding Rumors/Plot Points:
Fire Giants attacked Tribor and took a rod from the center of town.
Gua - Hill Giant Matriarch - Grug-Hug Village location generally described
Eraglass the Sage - Missing?

Loose Threads:
Iymrith the Ancient
Jeff the guard, abandoned in Everland
Yartar - Lady Italia, Bat-weirdos (Kella & Zopin), Paw-Ming, Lord Dryland
Old Gnawbone - wishes she could transform into an elf

Completed Quests:
Eye of the Allfather in the Valley of Kadroon
Find Harshnag
Highdale/Westfelds necromatic curse - Mountaintop Crypt
The Silver Hook adventuring party
Mt. Black
HawksNest Payroll
Zymorvan Giantslayer
Aboleth of Yartar
Defended Goldenfields
Well of Victory
Orcs of the Ardeep Forest
Nightstone (again)
Tomb of Darshin Hammerheart
Grey Hand
Zathros Zethros, Cloud Giant
Nightstone

5e: Eye of the Alfather and a Big Blue Dragon (take 2)

Okay, here's Joda the Monk's write up!

****

What's your favorite color dragon? Dead.


An excerpt from the tales of Joda the Monk.

Know O traveller that after the Rhemorazs were killed, Joda and her companions did valiantly try to open the arcane gate of Giants. They succeeded after some mishaps that resulted in deafness and pain. But, once across the threshold, they entered a brobdingnagian chamber. Many giant statues, each holding a lit lamp, surrounded an arcane circle, and within it, lay the body of a giant.

Reader, know that Joda, in her service to the goddess Tymora, entered the circle. The giant's ghost awakened. A friendly sort of shade, he talked about how this was the chamber of the oracle, and how his father betrayed him to the Blue Dragon, and how they were in search for a mythical weapon.

Joda wept at the evil sacrifice that a father would perform on his son! The ghost wanted Vengeance, as would we all if betrayed by our fathers! And Joda swore that all in her power would be done to bring justice to the ghost!

Fear not reader, for her companions did not forget about the oracle, and spoke with her. From her, they determined that the Blue Dragon held the key, where the King of Giants could be found, and more. As each question was answered, another lamp extinguished. Time was running out and the gate was closing. It was time to leave.

Upon the companion's return to the mortal world, (remember reader, that they were in a Giant's fortress high in the Sword Mountains), the earth started to shake and tremble. Something large was entering the fortress. A Blue Dragon. an elder, massive and dangerous, entered. It seemed that Joda, and her companions' adventures would end soon. But, Lady Tymora rewards those who risk all, and so it was that Harshnag stepped forward and battled the Blue Dragon, yelling at all to run. And so they did and escape the fortress, alive, and mostly hale.

And in the sky there came a floating ship flying the flag of a Red Dragon! The crew approached the companions and offered them the use of the ship. "We are at your service" they crowed "at the behest of our lord the Red Dragon!".

Red Dragons are evil, of course, but Joda knew, that sometimes, the best way to battle evil was with evil. And so, the companions boarded the air ship and ....

Thus ends the fragment found from the codex titled The Tales of Joda the Monk.

5e: Eye of the Alfather and a Big Blue Dragon!!

I had to miss the session of game, so this is the write up by our bard.

***

We picked up where we left off after fighting the Rhemoraz (and discovered a mysterious guest Warlock friend for the week). The party returned to the main room where they attempted to finally solve the puzzle of the magic archway. After some experimentation, it appeared we needed to touch the associated giant weapons to their runes in the right order. Using what we had already deduced, we managed to clear the first four or so runes without issue, but as we closed in on the final runes, we accidentally guessed the wrong order, triggering a nasty trap. The doors to the chamber sealed and a mighty thunderstorm deafened the party. Despite the fact that no one could hear each other speak, with the use of some creative utility magic and good old fashioned hand gestures, we managed to guide Harshnag to the correct solution before the acid rain and lightning strikes decimated the party.

With the puzzle solved, the trap faded away and the archway turned into a magical portal. Our more magically inclined members deduced that the portal would only stay open for an hour, so without any rest, we ventured forth... to discover a large vaulted chamber. Along the walls at equidistant spaces were six statues representing each of the various giant races holding a glowing lantern aloft. In the center of the room was a runic circle, and at the center of the circle was the corpse of a cloud giant on top of the 'King' rune. The runic circle contained mundane giant language inviting us to ask questions, and seeing no obvious traps, Joda approached the center of the circle, whereupon the spirit of the spirit of the slain cloud giant materialized before us.

Fortunately, the spirit was the friendly sort, and after some conversation, we discovered that the poor soul was betrayed by his own father and a Blue Dragon. The giant's time of death appeared to be from relatively recently, but before the troubles surrounding the giants started (the slain cloud giant said the currently missing giant king was the ruler when he was slain). His father had come to this room to ask the oracle questions, and the oracle revealed that there would be trouble among the giants, but that the father was not destined to claim the throne, but suggested that the son should 'step out of his father's shadow'. Enraged, the father turned on his son and then a blue dragon appeared and slew the son. The spirit of the son desired vengeance, and entrusted us with his valuables (a magic breastplate that adjusts in size to the wearer and an opal inscribed with the fire giant rune) as well as offering advice about how the oracle worked (we got six questions).

Then we asked the oracle some questions (some others have detailed notes of this):

--The blue dragon is named Irmith and has a lair in the desert.
--We should seek out the Storm King's daughter at Maelstrom.
--To get to the Maelstrom we need a Giant King's Conch, which are possessed by the leaders of each giant race.

The spirit suggested that if we had an artifact with a giant rune, we could use it to determine the location of one of the leaders. Although Bran suggested we already knew where the Hill Giant leader was, the party decided to try one of the items to see what happens. We offered up the newly discovered fire opal and discovered the location of the Fire Giant Duke, but it seems to have drained a portion of the artifact's power, so we decided not to offer any more just yet.

As the archway was starting to become unstable and we had used our six questions, the party decided to leave (since we could come back the next day for more questions), but as we left the oracle room, we were greeted by a massive blue dragon. Harshnag ordered the party to flee, as he smashed the statue of Aman, causing the entire mountain to begin to collapse on our heads. Hilde bravely tried to save the giant by throwing herself into battle but was forced back by the collapsing caverns, and the party ended up escaping just as the mountains caved in upon us.

Making our way down towards our base camp, we were greeted by a curious sight--a ship flying in the air suspended by a giant balloon. The ship's human crew greeted us and welcomed us on board. It turns out they were sent to help us by an ancient red dragon named Clout, who wants to meet us (although he said he was in no hurry and we could finish any business we had first). After retrieving our companions and hippogryphs from our base camp, we had a party with our new friends (and then ended the session).

5e: In the Eye of the Alfather

From: Sir Fulhoff of Clan Balderk, Knight of Hawk’s Nest, Battle Mage
To: Helja and Adrik of Clan Balderk

Mother and Father:

The Great Digger has been more obvious in her signals. Perhaps it is that we are in a holy place? Or it could be that she wants to make sure we stay focused on our mission. Whatever the reason, she quite literally lead the way…

Leaving the magical gate, we decided to explore the rest of the temple complex. One wing turned out to be cells for those giants who were just visiting the temple for a spell, or possibly monks who used to take care of the complex. There were two notable features of the hall, the first being a large crack in the wall of one of the cells, the other being the rounded shape of the floor, like a gutter. The magical statue at the end of the slightly sloped hall was another clue.

Before heading into the crevice ourselves, Bran used his bag of tricks to summon a creature to send into the hole. And this, dear family, is where the Great Digger made herself very clear, as the summoned creature was a giant badger! With Bran’s crow perched on it’s back, they went in. Bran reported that there were 2 main chambers, one was creepy, and the badger didn’t want to go there, the other was full of icy webs, and had several cocooned things. Thorin and Bran were pretty sure it was mountain goats, but Joda and I felt that this was important.



Heading in, we had to move slowly because of the icy uneven ground, and we soon found ourselves fighting ice spiders in the cramped confines of the tunnel. Their web attack was chilling, but we snapped out of it, and squashed the spiders. Following the tunnels to where Bran saw the cocoons, we hacked our way through the webbing and found an old corpse of a dwarven prospector, a mountain goat, and a seer of the Wyrmblood tribe. The seer was the only one of the three still alive. She told of a vision that brought her to the Eye: a blue dragon, a wyrmskull throne, and a scepter…

I said final rights for the prospector, and then piled rocks over his corpse to send him to his rest.

Deeper into the tunnels we came to the creepy chamber, and spied a mound of eggs topped by a bloated spider. She was so focused on turning her eggs, she didn’t notice us until we were on her, and because of our surprise and the intensity of our attack, she was blasted off the pile of eggs, her body crushed! But the eggs… They ALL hatched! There was much flailing and stomping, but the swarm of baby spiders were… well if not all killed, enough so that it will be years before they’re a real threat again.

Among the debris and crushed bits of spiders we came across a fancy hammer, which I haven’t had the chance to spend any time with, but I suspect it’s magical.

Back in the hall, we continued to explore the different cells, and triggered a giant boulder trap! Seeing the massive rock coming toward us, I told everyone to run for Harshnag, and as I reached him I completed the enchantment of flight on him. We were clinging on for dear life, while he hovered up and over the boulder! And then the magic statue at the end of the hall pushed the boulder back, resetting the trap, and opening the doors to the cells which had magically sealed.

In the upper section of cells, the back half had collapsed, but we discovered a satchel containing a magical ice shard!

Going back to the main room, we opened the far doors, and in a chamber that the word massive is inadequate to describe, a trio of remorhaz were basking by a (magical) fire pit. The door opening was enough to get their attention, and they charged toward us. Joda got her flame on, while Thorin hacked away at them. Aramel turned one into a goat, but that didn’t do anything to change it’s mood. I called on my lightning magics, and aside from the splatter of their fiery blood (which really did burn) we slaughtered the oversized vermin.

5e: Mote in the Eye of Alfather

From: Sir Fulhoff of Clan Balderk, Knight of Hawk’s Nest, Battle Mage
To: Helja and Adrik of Clan Balderk

Mother and Father:

The path to the Eye of the Alfather continued up the mountain, its scale and the thin air making distances harder to determine. The cavern walls fell away step by step until only open air flanked the icy path. The light of the sun sparkled off the crystals of ice suspended in the breeze. Ahead, the flickering of firelight emanated from behind the pillars of the temple.

Hilde went forward after Bran told her they looked like barbarians. There were 2, and a small white dragon. When Hilde approached, the dragon went into the temple, and the barbarians called for her to halt. They yelled back and forth for a while, basically telling us to go away. Thorin and I got tired of waiting, so I pulled out a scroll, and started yelling about how long we’ve traveled trying to find this place, and that we weren’t just going to wander away. Pointing at the scroll, I walked forward, Thorin at my side, repeating that we’d come a long way, and weren’t leaving without seeing the oracle. Eventually they decided to check with their chief, Wyrmblood.

Getting the okay, we all slowly made our way forward, but it was a trap. Once Bran, Hilde, and Aramel were in the tunnel, 2 massive stone blocks dropped down, sealing them in with one barbarian, and locking Thorin, Harshnag, and I out with one barbarian. They had better luck with theirs, and talked him into being peaceful, while ours made a more fatal choice. He hit Thorin hard a couple of times, and then Thorin hit back harder.



Meanwhile Harshnag had managed to deadlift the first block a few feet off the ground, and Thorin and I scampered under. We saw one barbarian watching another attacking the dragon with Hilde, while Aramel was strumming away, and deeper in the passage a shaman was casting a spell. I got the barbarian with his back to me, the dragon, and the shaman in a line, and let loose a Lightning Bolt! Thorin charged the dragon, but Hilde chopped it down before he reached it. I then used the wand of Magic Missiles to finish off the shaman.

The chief, Wyrmblood looked very worried, more so as Aramel mocked the last standing barbarian to death. Who says words don’t hurt? Thorin charges Wyrmblood, but Hilde gets there first, cutting through his defenses like they weren’t there. I shot him with a ray of frost, and Aramel mocked him. All that combined meant that Thorin, again, didn’t even get the chance to land a blow.

Bran found the switches that controlled the trap, and eventually got the block up, allowing Harshnag in. Up a massive set of stairs, and through a rhine covered door, we entered into a chamber of cyclopean dimensions, with statues of the 7 gods of giants, the 6 representing the major types of giants kneeling around the central Alfather giant. The Alfather faced a magical portal, with 6 runes inscribed on it. Above the portal read:

“Children Mine, Enter In Order, If You Wish To Cross This Border, Start With Low And End With High, Start With Hills And End With Sky”

Harshnag assures us that it sounds better in the original Giant. Interesting that the translation happens to rhyme a little…

We recognized a few of the runes, but decided that we’d explore some of the side chambers before tackling the gate.