Saved this old gem from the dump! Optical drive, 5.25" and 3.5" floppy drives, USB 1.0, Windows 98 pre-installed, starts up just fine! Only things I really want to do is get a CompactFlash-to-IDE adaptor to replace the old IDE hard drive and hook the output to go through a VCR. I promised InquFox that as soon as I could, I'd record me playing Command and Conquer: Tiberian Dawn onto a VHS tape and then upload it to YouTube.

EDIT: Well, report from much, MUCH later, this particular machine has been more trouble than it's worth. The FDD's are fucked, it's super annoyingly picky about what it will and won't load from its optical drive, it won't load drivers half the time, and I can't put a TV tuner card in to save to VHS in it, and even if I tried, it would probably reject the OEM drivers for stupid reasons.

So I'm actually DOS gaming on a Packard Bell Multimedia now, which has given me no problems whatsoever.