Welcome to the start of my latest project: Learning to Draw.
Lesson One: Anatomy and Shapes.

The story so far:

You may be asking why I’d upload such a basic, sad attempt at drawing. and well. It's mostly because of this quote:

“Sucking at something is the first step toward being sorta good at something.”
— Jake the Dog

You see. My problem in the past is that I try too hard… which means I don’t try enough. In other words: if it isn’t perfect, it isn’t worth doing. And if it isn’t worth doing, it won’t get done.

Then, one emotionally abusive relationship later, I finally started challenging my inner voice only to discover that my whole life had been built on planning and plotting my every waking moment in trying to min-max my chances of getting a guaranteed approval rating from everyone around me. Like seriously. I asked myself why had it been so easy to surrender my identity? Only to realize that my sense of self was built entirely on other's approval.

…Then I wandered into a weird and very kinky situation and ended up in a community that was welcoming and fun.
But also one that required learning skill, skills that required practicing. My perfectionism immediately hated this,

But at the same time, I really loved Shibari. And so I learned that Shibari doesn’t have to be pretty. It has to be safe (and consensual). That learning rope can be messy but also meaningful.

So this is my drawing goals:
Prove I can learn.
Invite advice.
Encourage other people to try, even if they suck.

So where am I now?

I’m practicing anatomy by finding shapes inside the body, building figures from simple forms. Circles and lines helped, but blocks work better. Also, I immediately tried to draw a fat bear. I won't explain why.

Next up: redrawing the sitting bear, but larger. Maybe push past framing and posing?
For that, I will need an eraser. I do not own one.
When I say I’m new, I mean new...
…May god have mercy on my soul.