parishs

·         Being close to him is so much better than I could have imagined. His perfect smell is burned in my memory.

·         He was a bit disappointed, that first day, that I didn’t want to go all the way, but later, he wrote that he was glad I had stopped him. He said he felt this huge responsibility to make me happy. He didn’t want me to think that he didn’t want me.

·         It’s so different to chat with him now we know each other. Cal is modest and interested in me, even a bit distant maybe. He says he needs time to digest what has happened. I just hope I lived up to his expectations. Maybe I am not what he wants.

·         I have to find a new way to spend my time. I feel how focused I have been on him, checking my phone every 5 minutes to see if he had responded. Now he doesn’t comment on the site anymore, I feel lost and alone. Was this what we had? A fantasy? Doesn’t he want the real me?

·         It makes me freaking insecure, but I am not going to be the one who begs him. I have to work in a few hours, and somehow I am sure he won’t be there, ogling me. I have to learn to live without the excitement of him being close to me again.

·        

·         When I come out of the shower, I hear a knock on my door, so softly that I doubt for a moment if I've heard anything, but I sense him, on the other side of the door. Shall I yell that he has to wait?

·         But before I can think, I open the door, I can’t wait to see him, I have to kiss him again. I see the shock on his face when I stand in front of him with just a towel around my waist, but he recovers quickly.

·         And as if a switch flips inside of him, he changes. He pushes me inside and slams the door shut with his foot. His strong hands press me against the wall and he looks at my body. His breath hitches when he touches my nipples. “You have them”, he says.

·         I just nod.

·         “Did it hurt?, he asks.

·         “Very freaking much”, I said, “but it’s healed now”.

·         He leans forward, takes a piercing in his mouth and starts to lick my nipple. His moan sounds like as if he is going to come, raw and from deep inside. With his hand, he touches the other one, making me so horny that I have a hard time standing up.

·         He feels it, that my knees are shaking. “You want me to stop?”, he asks, while he looks at me.

·         I shake my head. “Look at me Cal”, I whisper. “Read me. What do I need?”.

·         He kisses me softly on my lips and inhales. “You need me”, he says softly.

·         I nod and grab his hand. “Yes”, I say.

·        

·         “When did you get them?”, he asks, while he tucks on the piercings carefully.

·         “When you wrote about it”, I admit. I want nothing but honesty between us, it’s the truth.

·         “You did this for me?”, he asks confused.

·         “Lets’ say you inspired me”, I whisper and pull him close. “And I hoped that one day…”.

·         His moan is the answer I need. My fingers discover his warm torso. He is skinnier than I thought, but he is sexy. His nipples grow hard under my touch. I am going to bite them someday, as I know he likes it, but for now, I just want to find out how he feels.

·         Writing about what you want is definitely something different from actually doing it. Cal is different in person, but his personality will grow, when he knows me. And maybe he needs something else from me than what he writes about.

·         I don’t care, I know this thing between us is so strong and will only grow. He knows my boundaries and desires.

·         He surprises me when he pushes me on my bed, obviously he feels at home and confident enough to do what he wants. His dominance has always fascinated me, but now I literally feel it, it works like an aphrodisiac, I want him more than ever.

·         “Cal”, I moan.

·         He lies beside me and caresses my chest. “Patience Thom”, he whispers.

Title: Finally, chapter 2
Author: parishs
Rating: uhm....
Word Count:800ish
Summary: totally AU, the start of something beautiful, Thom's POV. Including Cal.
Beta: My beautiful Prince AJ
Disclaimer: well, I own Eastsiders for a bit I guess, but not artistically....




It’s obvious that he lives in his head. I had to do something, or he wouldn’t have figured out it was me who he was chatting with for months. I saw the panic in his eyes when I poured the vodka in the coffee cup. I had bought the exotic drink for him weeks ago and kept it hidden under the bar till he was ready, but suddenly I couldn’t take it anymore. I couldn’t wait another weekend, knowing he would write a new story about me.

I know how his brain works. He writes so graphically about what he wants to do with me. It makes me long for him, I know how much he cares about me. His fantasies turn me on, but for me it’s not enough to read about it, I want to feel his hands on me.

When he walks outside, I greet my colleagues. Jeremy frowns; he knows that I am a little obsessed with Cal. He doesn’t understand what I see in him though. I didn’t tell him about the stories I've read, or the private images Cal shared with me that came from his mind. Jeremy still hopes things will work out between us.

But he is not what I need. This silent guy with the beautiful eyes could be. I watch him while he walks out of the bar. He has an unusual motion, but it’s fascinating how he moves.

I have been thinking about his long fingers in my hair last night. How would he taste? And smell? Up close? I have no expectations of our non-date. I try to push all thoughts about it out of my head. We can’t start with all the kinky stuff he writes about, for me it’s important to get to know him before I can give myself.

On the internet, we talked about physical stuff, and that was exciting, but my heart throbs in my throat when I think about kissing him. Just touching his face, looking into his eyes and smelling his hair. That would be enough for me today. And when I read his eyes right, he isn’t up for anything more.

I lose him in the crowd, but that’s okay, I know where he lives. I have followed him home countless of times. And I sensed it was him behind me so many times when I've walked home. His light footfalls, his soft breathing, his scent caught on a slight breeze when he walked behind me. So many nights I opened my door, hoping he would come and talk to me, but he didn’t dare. And I didn’t turn around.

This cat and mouse thing I played with him, he had no idea. I stood behind him when he wrote his erotic dreams on his laptop. I figured out his alias on Nifty.org and commented on his stories, praising his writing talent and hot imagination. That was the start of a daily connection. We talked online during my break, while he sat just a few feet away from me. In time, the discussions got more philosophical. He says so much in so little words. I made him explain what he meant. He is a dream man.

I wonder what he is thinking right now. He made me realize that invisible guys like him have big dreams. I didn’t have that, before I “met” him. I just acted, I didn’t think that much. But when I got sucked into his world, I knew I could never date another guy again. But first I have to see if we click. You can dream all you want, but in the end, it’s about the connection when you kiss someone.

To me that is. Jeremy just jumps on the guys he's scored with on Grindr. He doesn’t like to kiss, he just wants to get laid. For me it’s so much more. He calls me a girl for wanting more. I don’t give a shit. He makes me realize that we don’t work, and why.

He is waiting for me. His big eyes still ooze disbelief.

“Hey”, I say.

He just nods.

I look at his ass while he walks up the stairs. I want to touch him, but I control myself. When we are inside, he turns around. We look into each other's eyes for a long time. “Finally”, I hear myself moan while I lean in, succeeding in making my lips touch his.
 

He thinks I’m a virgin. I knew that picture of me would make him come back to my table.

I have seen him look at me so many times. He doesn’t know if he likes me because I am hipster or because I am something he cannot define yet. He is used to being chased, as a waiter girls and guys flirt with him to get a free drink or get him in their bed.

I have been sitting here so many days and nights that I know how his life works. He is really good in his work, he is friendly and nice, and calm, even when guests keep complaining about stupid things. His smile is plastered on his face, but it’s a genuine one, he just loves his life.

Either he is single, or he has a boyfriend with a big heart. I know he has slept with a couple of patrons, but that’s a while ago.


I know where he lives, it was so easy to follow him home, he didn’t look back once. He is a happy go lucky guy. He reads a lot in his freetime. He has cats, I see him carry cat food into his house every week.

I look at him from behind my laptop. He thinks I am a photographer. I could be, because some of the pictures of him on my Instagram account are really good. Kathy told me last night that my fascination with this guy was really getting creepy. When she summed up what I knew about Thom and what I did to be close to him, I had to admit that she was right.

He lives under my skin, he is the one I dream about every night. He is the one I want to…..but the thing is…….I cannot risk losing him. If somehow I could find out if he likes it the way I want it, then we could be real, maybe, one day. But if my fascination grosses him out, I couldn’t live with it. So I just stare at him from behind my computer and get inspired to write another story for Nifty.org.

Wrapped up in my story, I didn’t hear him. His hand on my shoulder almost makes that I want to run. He has never touched me before. He stands behind me and I feel this urge to close my laptop. He can’t see what he awoke in me. But I just sit there and try not to breath.

“Do you want a refill?”, he asks. His emotional voice touches me every time, I can only inhale and hope that my heart keeps beating. “Or is it time for a Moskovskaya already?”, he whispered in my neck.

He is back behind the counter when I finally exhale. Je-sus. This can’t be a coincidence. How could he know what my favorite vodka brand was? He dropped a bomb, a grenade, and I have no clue what that means, what I’m supposed to do.

I look at him and he smiles while he pours the transparent liquid in a coffee cup. Now my heart stops beating. He knows. He knows me, he reads my stories on Nifty.org. When he looks at me, I see a desire in his brown eyes that was never there. He takes off his apron while he walks my way. He gives me my drink and smiles. “Here Master”, he says, “time to take control”.

Lost in his eyes, I can see his understanding. He knows me. And he agrees. He sticks out his hand and waits till I grab it.

“sub25”, he says.

“It’s you”, is all I can say. “I didn’t know…”.

Suddenly I realize that he needs something different from me, but I have to be sure we are on the same page.

“You’re okay?”, I ask.

He nods. “It’s going to be like we discussed on the site, right?”, he asks. “Just you and me?”.

How can he ask me that? All I can think about is him. I know his secret desires and he know mine. We have been talking about them for months, anonymously, on the site. And now we are going to make them a reality.

“Get up”, I order.

“Not here”, he answers. “Only behind closed doors”.