So apparently on that writer's block question thingy on LJ that I never do, today's question is "What's your favorite line from a song, and why?"

And I could come up with at least a dozen answers, lines that have meant something to me or that I think are really clever or funny or smart, and I'm tempted to do so, but I think that would just be dancing around the issue, because I'm pretty sure anyone who's read this journal for any period of time could guess the answer:

And I know you're lonely for words that I ain't spoken / tonight, we'll be free, all the promises will be broken

(I know, you thought it was going to be "you ain't a beauty, but hey, you're all right, and that's all right with me," which is definitely on the list, along with most of the lyrics from the song, and various lyrics from other Springsteen songs - "and after all this time to find we're just like all the rest / stranded in the park and forced to confess to / hiding on the backstreets." "For the ones who had a notion / a notion deep inside / that it ain't no sin to be glad you're alive." [actually, nearly anything from either "Badlands" or "Backstreets" is a possibility.] "We learned more from a three minute record, baby, than we ever learned in school." "No retreat, baby, no surrender." "Is a dream a lie that don't come true, or is it something worse?""Everything dies, baby, that's a fact, but maybe everything that dies someday comes back." "Hit 'em in the funnybone, that's where they expect it least." "Nothing is forgotten or forgiven when it's your last time around / I got stuff running round my head that I just can't live down." "You're born into this life paying for the sins of somebody else's past." "You got to learn to live with what you can't rise above." "God have mercy on the man who doubts what he's sure of." "The highway's jammed with broken heroes on a last chance power drive. Everybody's out on the run tonight but there's no place left to hide.")

I just... for me, that line is the culmination of the song, and I love that of all the things he's offering if she goes with him, freedom from all the obligations that have kept them from leaving, from going somewhere or doing something better (and also the negative promises that keep them where they are, that tell them how they're failures and will never be able to have anything better) is right at the top of the list. He's not making any promises himself, either ("words that I ain't spoken") but the whole song is about the possibility of redemption, "the chance to make it good somehow."

This is a song that can make me stop whatever I'm doing to listen whenever it comes on, and these are the lines that send a chill down my spine every single time:

From your front porch to my front seat, / the door's open but the ride, it ain't free. / And I know you're lonely for words that I ain't spoken. / Tonight we'll be free, all the promises will be broken.

It lifts my heart out of my chest every damn time.

(Thunder Road)

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This entry at DW: http://musesfool.dreamwidth.org/325445.html. people have commented there.

I'm sure when I uploaded these the other night, I meant to tell a story about them, or do some sort of blathering on the way I normally do, but I kind of can't remember what I wanted to say.

I mean, I could tell you about the second time I saw Counting Crows in concert, out at the Jones Beach Theatre, and I could tell you that Adam Duritz was in a much happier mood than the time I saw them at the Beacon, when he had a broken leg and was just kind of surly all around. I could tell you about how it rained, a soft, summer rain that felt pretty good, even though it's always cooler right on the water than it is inland, and there's a nice breeze generally blowing through the theatre. That it was an easy rain, the kind that surprises you when you realize that it is in fact raining, not like the rain the night we saw Elvis Costello there, with the huge cracks of thunder and bolts of lightning, and the way I walked through the ankle-deep puddles in the parking lot barefoot, because my cons were so soaked it didn't matter (and how I put them on pretty quickly after realizing that standing in ankle-deep water during a lightning storm is not perhaps the brightest thing anyone ever did).

It was a warm summer rain and we were dancing and they were playing "Rain King" and then all of a sudden the song changed, and after a moment of puzzlement, Lee and I looked at each other and shrieked loud enough to turn heads even during a concert, because it was Thunder Road (this was not recorded at the concert I am talking about, but it's close enough). We appeared to be the only people in our section who understood what was going on, the only ones who sang along at the tops of our lungs when the lyrics changed from "Rain King" to "Thunder Road."

So possibly I meant to talk about that, and the way that it doesn't matter, really, what's going on - if I hear the opening notes or lines of Thunder Road, I stop, caught, and listen, because it's got its hooks in me, deep and good. Even when it's in the middle of another song.

I don't even have a random concert story to tell about the Melissa Etheridge version, featuring Bruce Springsteen. I just think it might be my favorite semi-cover of the song (can it be a cover if the original artist participates? these are the questions that keep me up nights, you know.) because it captures the desperate ragged hope of the original, but still sounds different enough because of the female voice, embodying the female longing in the song, to make it interesting and heartbreaking in its own way.

Does Mary get in the car at the end? I have to think that she does, that she's not the Mary of Victoria Williams' "Crazy Mary" or the unnamed narrator of Pearl Jam's "Elderly Woman Behind the Counter in a Small Town," the woman who stayed behind and let the world, let love and hope and possibility, pass her by because she was afraid it wasn't enough, wasn't going to last, was going to be yet another disappointment, when it's the act of getting in the car, of taking the chance, of holding out hope for more, that's winning. (I, er, probably should have realized I would end up in this place and uploaded those songs as well, but I did not.)

Man, just writing about this song can still reduce me to tears. I am clearly a hopeless case.

***

Let us now return to fannish things.

kassrachel gave me these five things in that five things that remind her of me meme thing:

1. Mal
2. New York
3. lyrics / poetry
4. girl!Sam
5. the Iliad

( my answers, cut for lengthCollapse )

That was fun.

~*~

Thunder Road is one of my all-time favorite songs, if not THE all-time favorite (it certainly gets my vote as Greatest Song of All Time), and I've been listening to it a lot lately, which means it must be time for another post about how awesome it is.

Mostly, I've been listening to it in conjunction with Wings for Wheels, which is sort of the proto-"Thunder Road" - the music and some of the lyrics are the same, but it's a very different song.

In one of the posts I made way back when, I posted a bunch of different versions, and a lot of them capture the wistful/bittersweet quality to the song, but not many capture the hope that accompanies the original, album version.

"Wings for Wheels" is a version with almost no bittersweetness; instead, it's full of sheer brash bravado. There's still a little wistfulness - my favorite lines are I'm no prince and I can't lay the stars at your feet / But I got this old car and she's pretty tough to beat / There's plenty of room in my front seat, baby, if you wanna take it - but it doesn't have the same world-weariness as the final version, that knowledge that things have gone badly before and will probably go badly again, but there's still a chance, out on the road, to catch the promised land the narrator and Mary (Angelina in "Wings for Wheels") have missed out on so far.

It does strike something inside of me, though, makes me all achy in the chestal area in almost-but-not-quite the same way as "Thunder Road" does - that rough, young hopefulness, that cockiness, the fact that his car is almost more important to him than his girl - But this 4/4/2's gonna overheat / Make up your mind girl, I gotta get her back out on the street - [and that reminds me of something I read or heard once (via Nick Hornby?) about Elvis Costello, whom I love, being asked his opinion of Bruce Springsteen, and his response was "I don't drive." Or something to that effect. Which I find hilarious in a really bitchy way], combined with really fantastic live energy (and some unfortunate lyrical choices [the dirty wings them highway angels wear? seriously?] that were later jettisoned, thankfully) make it a more rollicking song, but still with that touch of wistfulness.

"Wings for Wheels" is less about redemption than "Thunder Road" is - it doesn't have the same weight to it (and I am always kind of shocked when I think of how young Springsteen was when he wrote it), the same knowledge of how things go wrong and this is possibly the last chance for things to go right, that permeates "Thunder Road" - but it makes me happy in its own way.

Hee! And the radio is playing "Born to Run" now. As if they know!

***

Another thing that makes me happy - thecakeblog. Man, when those pictures pop up on my flist, I just sort of stare in awe (and hunger). Mmm...cake...

***

I'm having a bit of a morning. Let me tell you about it.

I slept through my alarm, and scrambled to get dressed and out the door. Of course, I forgot to swap out my ugly old white flip-flops for a pair of work-acceptable shoes, but that's okay, I have a pair of sandals in my desk. I missed the bus. I realized, as I was standing on the bus stop, cursing the bus that had just pulled away as I got there, that my top was on inside out. Backwards you can fix in public. Inside out? Not so much. Luckily, it is the shell of a twin set, so I just pulled the cardigan (short-sleeved, thank god) on to cover up my idiocy.

I arrived at work without further mishap, though there was the almost embarrassing incident of tearing up during "Wings for Wheels" (it came on right after "Thunder Road," and it's so interesting to hear the early version - it's not nearly as good a song in that state as it becomes with "Thunder Road," but there's something about that version that gets me - it's younger and rawer than "Thunder Road," but no less hopeful, and of course, it's live, which adds urgency).

Now I have actual work-related work to do, which is no fun, but at least it's Friday, right? I have to spend my weekend writing. I can do this. It's just a matter of will and determination, and sheer panic at an approaching deadline.

Have a poem:

Telescope Psalm

Am I afraid to be forgiven?
I'd have to wear nicer suits.

By the time everything is fair I will
have devised a system to send word

via the birds on my roof. But I am
of two minds about most subjects

and, in turns, one mind must elbow the other
who is snoring. That's why I thought I enjoyed

talking too much tonight at the brewpub
until the silence of the long walk home

made a better argument, better
company. The sky's library of stars and dust,

whatever is possible remaining possible
even as it's gazed at through the private

telescopes of an entire hemisphere.
It's now. It's not forever. And this

forever shall be true. To see further,
those without telescopes sometimes

cup their hands around their eyes.

~Paula Cisewski

***

I am the kind of tired where I am having trouble focusing, and my skin actually hurts to touch. Which usually only happens when I have a fever, but i don't. Unless the allergies are doing wacky things.

Have some poetry:

( Rainbarrows by Elisabeth BletsoeCollapse )

~*~

top five songs of the moment:

Sound of the City - Tom McRae
Got a Suitcase, Got Regrets - Tom McRae
Your Misfortune - Mike Doughty
So Much Mine - The Story
Crazy Love - Thea Gilmore

And some comfort music, all Springsteen. Can't be down when I listen to these songs:

Thunder Road - The greatest song of all time, hopeful and wistful and achy.
Show a little faith, there's magic in the night
You ain't a beauty, but hey you're all right
Oh and that's all right with me

Wings for Wheels - This is an early version of "Thunder Road," not quite as awesome as the final version, but the joyful live performance makes me happy.
This 442 is gonna overheat
Make up your mind, girl, I gotta get her back out on the street
I know you're lonely like me so baby don't try and fake it
I'm no prince and I can't lay the stars at your feet
But I got this old car and she's pretty tough to beat
There's plenty of room in my front seat, baby if you wanna take it

Blinded by the Light - I love trying to sing along with this and keep up with the lyrics.
Oh, some hazard from Harvard was skunked on beer playin' backyard bombardier
Yes, and Scotland Yard was trying hard, they sent a dude with a calling card,
he said, do what you like, but don't do it here

Rosalita (Come Out Tonight)
my tires were slashed and I almost crashed, but the lord had mercy
my machine she's a dud and I'm stuck in the mud somewhere in the swamps of Jersey

Sherry Darling
Well I got some beer and the highway's free
And I got you, and baby, you've got me.
Hey, hey, hey what d'you say Sherry Darlin'

~*~

Wow, so ten years ago Buffy the Vampire Slayer premiered. I came in right at the beginning, but didn't realize it was the first episode for some reason. A lot of who I am as a fangirl I owe to BtVS fandom - atbvs to be exact. The foundations of my fannish behavior were laid by alt.tv.homicide, but I was never very active there, whereas I was quite a voluble poster on atbvs (and alt.tv.angel) for a couple years. I showed up a few weeks after "Becoming 2" and stayed for a good long while.

I loved my time in BtVS fandom - I met a lot of lovely people, some of whom I'm still in touch with, and who have found their way here.

The first piece of fanfic I ever started as an adult, with the intention of posting, was for Angel, actually, in June of 2000 (it remains unfinished, though you can find it in my memories here).

I didn't rewatch any BtVS eps today, but I certainly loved the show - especially the first three seasons - with a deep and abiding love few shows have matched.

***

Today is also Remus Lupin's birthday. I wish I had some hot new Remus/Sirius porn to celebrate with, but I don't. I do have two older stories I wrote that are about Remus's birthday, though: The Habit of Wishing, which is porn set during OotP, and The Ninth Beatitude, which features passive-aggressive teenage!Remus.

***

So in that Friday five from last week about imaginary vids, I didn't list the one that I'd really love to see, except there is no footage to make it, but I keep thinking about it.

How awesome would it be to have a John/Mary vid to Thunder Road? The story that "Summer's Here, and the Time Is Right" was originally going to be was based on "Thunder Road," but it didn't work out the way I expected, so I still have the idea in my head, of John and Mary as high school sweethearts, but when he goes off to Vietnam, he breaks up with her, tells her not to wait, and so when he comes back, she's like, "You told me not to wait," and then he has to win her back, and prove that he still loves her, and man, one day maybe I will write that story, but I covet the vid, too. Think about how cool it would be:

The screen door slams
Mary's dress waves
Like a vision she dances across the porch
As the radio plays
Roy Orbison singing for the lonely
Hey that's me and I want you only
Don't turn me home again
I just can't face myself alone again
Don't run back inside
darling you know just what I'm here for
So you're scared and you're thinking
That maybe we ain't that young anymore
Show a little faith, there's magic in the night
You ain't a beauty, but hey you're alright
Oh and that's alright with me

Mary in a sundress, hem swaying in the summer twilight above her bare feet on the silvery grey wood of the porch, and John in his white t-shirt and jeans, leaning against the Impala, hands shoved into his pockets.

*hearts*

They need to give us a flashback episode so there can be footage for this. *nods firmly*

***

Speaking of John Winchester, you've all seen this awesomely hot manip by slodwick, right? Superpsych! Hee! I totally want the story now, where John and Dean are bumbling detectives and Sam is the brainy, leggy secretary who actually solves all their cases and rolls his eyes when they take the credit...

***

There's still time to vote in my poll...

***

Back to writing now.

***

this week's theme is acoustic stuff. I don't have a lot, but here's a small selection of what I do have:

Born to Run - Bruce Springsteen

Born in the USA - Bruce Springsteen

Thunder Road - Bruce Springsteen

Thunder Road - Bruce Springsteen & Melissa Etheridge

Rain King & Thunder Road - Counting Crows (Okay, this one isn't acoustic, but given the Thunder Road nature of this post, I couldn't not include it.)

Greetings to the New Brunette - Billy Bragg

A New England - Billy Bragg

~*~

Grey's Anatomy

( spoilers for Great ExpectationsCollapse )

***

I've been listening to "Thunder Road" on repeat today, with the volume turned all the way up. The ultimate in musical comfort food, I know no matter what, I will feel better at the end of the song.

And I know you're lonely for words that I ain't spoken
But tonight we'll be free, all the promises'll be broken

There were ghosts in the eyes of all the boys you sent away
They haunt this dusty beach road in the skeleton frames of burned-out Chevrolets

*shivers*

***