I honestly didn't notice how "absent" I have been lately until I got a couple of "are you still around?" messages. So I checked in here and wow...has it really been a year and a half since I last posted? Oy. That was definitely not intentional.

Obviously, a lot has happened with the passage of time. And every time I would think about posting again, I'd get overwhelmed. Where does one even begin when they've been gone so long? But the truth is, I've missed everyone online. I never really got into Twitter, so this was how I connected people. And not being active here, it's no wonder that lately I've been feeling horribly disconnected from everyone and everything. Sadly, I don't even know who is around anymore.

And now that I'm trying to post an update, I have no idea what to say or where to start. So I'll just leave it here, with no real update at all except saying that yes, I'm still around. I can't say I'll do better with updating, but I can say that I will try. I really miss having this outlet in my life. I miss writing. I miss art. I miss a lot of things. But who's to say I can't slowly reintroduce myself back into my fannish fun?

Anyway, hi. Anyone miss me? Anyone still around? Anything specific you want to know? I wouldn't mind having a starting point. :)

Wow, it's been awhile, as always. For me, it's the same ole story. Just working a lot and then not spending as much time on the computer lately. But it's summer, and for me, the past summers have always equaled spn_j2_bigbang time! I think I've participated almost every year, if not all. Well, this year I almost didn't. I haven't been able to write a lot in a long time. And then I read the summaries and thought, maybe I'll do art. One summary definitely stood out and caught my attention. A "Choose-Your-Own-Adventure" Style story, or, in this case, a "Choose-Your-Own-Porn." I was intrigued. And let me tell you, I thought it was a really fun read. So here's my art. Be sure to check out the story and tell blackrabbit42 just how fabulous she really is.

Jared Padalecki and the Kinky College Adventure



( Art this wayCollapse )

Ah, Veronica Mars. I knew you way back when...

So, who is going to see the Veronica Mars movie in theaters? Who has already seen it (premiers and such...)? I, myself, will be driving down to Denver tomorrow night after work to check out an advance showing. I have to admit, I'm a bit excited. I just rewatched the pilot episode and man, I did so love that show. Especially season one. Thinking about VM has reminded me why I love online fandom. Veronica Mars was a small show and honestly, not too many people I knew/know in my everyday life have seen the show (or even heard of it). But online, I was able to connect with other fans who, like me, loved the show, wanted to talk about it, and were extremely passionate about sharing that love. Some were writers, some were artists, and some were just conversationalists. But we became a family of sorts. And many of those fan-friends are still in my life today. I may not talk to them often, or nearly as much as I would like to, but they are still around. And some of those friends have become so much more than just online friends. I recently described __tiana__ as my "friend-shaped soulmate" and to think, we actually started talking in a group chat back in the VM days. Many of my VM friends have carried over to the SPN fandom and others have not. But I still think back on those days fondly. Anyway, just wanted to say yay VM. I'm proud to say I'm still a fan and yes, I supported the efforts to have this movie made. It's amazing what a few (give or take tens of thousands) fans can do.

I don't really think I've ever noticed my LJ-versary before. But this year, not only did I notice, but it's a big one. 10 years on LJ. I hardly ever post anymore and I really miss it. I miss posting and I miss connecting with everyone. To celebrate, I decided to post a mix cd. I used to share music all the time and it's a bit depressing when I think about how little I have done so lately. I chose to share the mix I listened to when writing my last fic (which was posted almost a year ago, coincidentally). The fic is called "I Found You in a Reflection" and was written for the last j2_everafter challenge. It's based on the Disney movie (mostly the ride), The Haunted Mansion. So it's a pretty mellow, haunting soundtrack. Anyway, I wanted to share. And a mix wouldn't be complete without a cover, so it looks like I can say that I'm not only sharing music, which I haven't done in awhile, but I also made art, which I haven't done in awhile. :)



Title: I Found You In a Reflection
Author: lostt1
Pairing: Jared/Jensen
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 8342
Warning: A little language.
Disclaimer: Not mine. I just like to play with them every once in awhile.
Summary: Jared gets more than he bargained for when a visit to a haunted house teaches him about life, death, and life after death. Or was that love after death?

( Just a Little Haunted, Haunting MusicCollapse )

Apparently I haven't posted anything since April. Whoops! To be honest, every time I think about updating, I get overwhelmed with the sheer amount of things to talk about. And then when I log in, everything flies out the window. So I figured I'd do myself a favor and just make a short list of things that have happened. I won't go into much detail because I don't know what you all want to hear about. But if you want more info/pictures/fangirling of any sort, let me know. I'll talk about anything, but I figure if there is one or two things you want to hear me go on and on about instead of a lot of rambling about everything, I'd rather focus on a few topics.

Where to begin?



1. I've lost a lot of weight. So in that pic, I was down about...40 pounds, I think. That was at my cousin's wedding in August. I've lost more since then, gained some (not a lot, but I chose not to follow any diet plan during the holidays), and now I'm back on track and losing again. It has been tough, but I'm really proud of my progress.

2. Madi, my niece, aka my favorite person ever. I've been lucky enough to go home three times this year (March for a friend's wedding, August for said cousin's wedding, and Christmas) and my entire family met up in Orlando for a week's vacation in October. So much fun. I'm so happy I was able to go because I wouldn't have wanted to miss Madi's first time in the ocean or meeting "The Mouse." We really need to vacation together more often.

3. Mocha. My kitty. After getting allergy shots for more than a year and a half now, my doc finally said it would be ok to try to have a cat around again. I honestly wasn't wanting a kitten, but she is a flood rescue. I was going to get an older cat because kitten energy drives me crazy. She's a psychotic ball of fur and I love her, but I can't wait until she is not tearing up my home anymore.

4. Oh yeah, the flood. Friday the 13th. That sucked. It was devastating and the area is still recovering (I live in northern Colorado).

5. Tim Foust. The bass for Home Free, a country acapella group that won the most recent season of the Sing Off. I'm more than a little obsessed. The guy is incredible and has a 5-octave range. His low notes give me chills. He also reminds me of Jared Padalecki for several reasons. They were born the same day (and I'm fairly certain the same year, too), they are both Southern Texas boys, both are tall with long, luscious locks, sexy voices, etc. Guh. So much love. And he has a pretty fabulous sense of humor, too, from what I've seen in vids and the show and such. I really love Home Free a bunch, oddly enough. I've never been all "country yay!" but I have listened to it. And I can go on and on because this really is my topic of obsession of the moment. I absolutely love acapella music and these guys truly are amazing. LOVE. Here, have a vid of their performance of "Ring of Fire."



6. I work a lot. I technically have 3 jobs. Full time job. Part-time food delivery job. And trying to build my business selling jewelry.

7. I missed Wincon in 2013 due to the family vacation in October and being in the middle of a major, major trial at work. But I have my ticket to Wincon 2014.

8. Writing. I have been struggling with it for the past few years, it seems. But I did manage to post fic for the last round of j2_everafter. And I snagged a prompt for the new round of spn_meanttobe. I'm considering Big Bang. But seriously, I just need to get over this stupid writer's block and just get back to it. I miss writing and I miss the conversations writing brought into my life.

9. Ok, there is probably a lot more. But if I think too hard about things, I may never post this. So I'll just post and move right along.

10. I just really miss posting here and interacting with everyone. So hi. Thanks for reading. And like I said, let me know if you want to know more about anything above (or anything else really). I can't promise I'll be posting with any sort of regularity, but I am going to try.

So I just have a quick question for those of you who have dogs and work full-time. Do you use a crate for your pup during the day? Do you hire someone to come let him/her out during the day? Do you run home during a lunch break? I am asking because I will probably be adopting a 7 month maltipoo on Tuesday. She has been crate-trained and would spend time during the day in the crate, but the current owners were able to come home for a couple hours around lunch. I may be able to make that happen every once in awhile, but I can't do it every day. I'd love to hire someone, but also, that's not possible every day. I simply can't afford that. But I really want to make this work. And I know that this isn't a new issue and it's obviously one that several of you deal with every day. So....what do you do? Inquiring minds want to know! I need your advice!

Title: I Found You In a Reflection
Author: lostt1
Pairing: Jared/Jensen
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 8342
Warning: A little language.
Disclaimer: Not mine. I just like to play with them every once in awhile.
Summary: Jared gets more than he bargained for when a visit to a haunted house teaches him about life, death, and life after death. Or was that love after death?
Notes: For the final j2_everafter challenge, this fic is inspired by the movie The Haunted Mansion. Well, to be more accurate, it's based more on the ride the movie is based on and all of the stories cast members like to tell. I haven't written anything is so long, I have almost forgotten how. Here's hoping it doesn't completely suck. And I'm sure it needs massive editing, which will have to wait. I wanted to post before the deadline, so it is what it is right now.



( Welcome Foolish Mortals. Collapse )

Ok, time to post again. It's been way too long.

A lot has been going on with me. Went to wincon and had a blast, like always. Ended up quitting Macy's as soon as I returned. Basically, I got penalized for going on vacation, even though I had told them months in advance. In the end, I just wasn't making very much money there and the stress was too great. So it had to go buh-bye. And now I've moved on. I have actually become an independent distributor for Premier Designs jewelry. And let me tell you, I'm loving it. It is direct sales, home show based, but it makes me really happy. I pretty much still have my training wheels on, but I'm off to a good start. Fact is, I enjoy it because I am getting paid to play with jewelry and hang out with a bunch of women having a good time. Exact opposite of my full-time job. I mean, who is happy to be at court? It's nice to have the balance. And my jewelry box is becoming more and more awesome every day.

What else? I had a great holiday home with my family. My niece is still one of my favorite people in the world. She just turned 2 on Monday and she's such a riot. We talk a lot on Facetime, so she knows me. She got so excited to see me when I got home. It was awesome. I can't wait to go home again. Lucky for me, it'll be pretty soon. I'm going home in March for a wedding. And thanks to Spring Break, I get to spend extra time home when I go. Yay!

Goals for the new year? I need to post more. I'm going to redo my bathroom. And write. I need to...keep writing. Yes folks, that's right. KEEP writing. I will be posting fic next month (Feb 26th, baby) for j2_everafter. I chose The Haunted Mansion and based my fic more on the ride (and the stories cast members pass down). I have most everything together for it, but I'm left with a dilemma. So now's your turn to help me out. How should it end? 'Magical Healing Ghost Cock' or 'Heck No! It's a Disney Movie Ride!.' Thoughts?

Ok, I really do need to post more. But right now, I'm tired. And I have more work to do before I can crash. Miss you all!

So everyone at wincon who told me I haven't posted lately...no one told me I hadn't posted since July! WTF? I feel really out of touch with everything and everyone and I hate it. But will this be the real post I've been promising? Nope. I just had to share a song.

It's painfully obvious that I've been going through a horrible case of writers block. I have so many ideas but have been struggling with the words. I know if I can just get started on one of those ideas, I would be golden. So what do I do? I sign up for another challenge. j2_everafter, to be exact. I snagged 'The Haunted Mansion' because I have this idea that I really hope I can bring to life. It's based more on the stories behind the ride as told by my former castmembers than the movie, but it has a bit of the movie mixed in. Anyway, like always, I've been building my soundtrack. Now I want to share one of the songs I had to discard. It has the right emotion, but doesn't quite fit. But seriously, it makes me sob.

Like always, I need to post a real update. A lot has changed/has been going on since I last posted. Including a new job (sort of - still at the same place), the fires, the shooting in Aurora, my trip home to visit family, upcoming Wincon, etc. But right now, I just wanted to post this video because it's my happy place at the moment.



I really need a dance icon or two. Hmmm...