{"id":"urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:localjoke","title":"Notes of a Dime-Store poet","subtitle":"I'm the","author":{"name":"I'm the"},"link":[{"@attributes":{"rel":"alternate","type":"text\/html","href":"https:\/\/localjoke.livejournal.com\/"}},{"@attributes":{"rel":"self","type":"text\/xml","href":"https:\/\/localjoke.livejournal.com\/data\/atom"}},{"@attributes":{"rel":"service.feed","type":"application\/x.atom+xml","href":"https:\/\/localjoke.livejournal.com\/data\/atom","title":"Notes of a Dime-Store poet"}}],"updated":"2012-12-28T20:05:01Z","entry":[{"id":"urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:localjoke:3817","link":[{"@attributes":{"rel":"alternate","type":"text\/html","href":"https:\/\/localjoke.livejournal.com\/3817.html"}},{"@attributes":{"rel":"self","type":"text\/xml","href":"https:\/\/localjoke.livejournal.com\/data\/atom\/?itemid=3817"}}],"title":"Icons; Examples \/\/ Requests","published":"2012-12-28T03:18:01Z","updated":"2012-12-28T20:05:01Z","content":"all requests will be posted to <\/a>ascalons<\/b><\/a><\/span>




Steal this and be destroyed! :D



Forms:<\/b>
Subject: (Fandom\/Show)
Amount: (I will not make more than 25, sorry.)
Joined\/Watching <\/a>ascalons<\/b><\/a><\/span>?

<\/a><\/center>"},{"id":"urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:localjoke:3420","link":[{"@attributes":{"rel":"alternate","type":"text\/html","href":"https:\/\/localjoke.livejournal.com\/3420.html"}},{"@attributes":{"rel":"self","type":"text\/xml","href":"https:\/\/localjoke.livejournal.com\/data\/atom\/?itemid=3420"}}],"title":"Things to come after college finals:","published":"2012-03-04T10:27:08Z","updated":"2012-03-04T10:27:08Z","content":"-Follow up to A Method To My Madness.
-A Sherlockian Ryden fic where Brendon is John and Ryan is Sherlock - and John is Lestrade because he's perfect for Lestrade."},{"id":"urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:localjoke:3219","link":[{"@attributes":{"rel":"alternate","type":"text\/html","href":"https:\/\/localjoke.livejournal.com\/3219.html"}},{"@attributes":{"rel":"self","type":"text\/xml","href":"https:\/\/localjoke.livejournal.com\/data\/atom\/?itemid=3219"}}],"title":"localjoke @ 2012-02-07T00:59:00","published":"2012-02-07T08:59:18Z","updated":"2012-02-07T08:59:18Z","category":[{"@attributes":{"term":"drabble"}},{"@attributes":{"term":"ryden"}}],"content":"Title: Just a little Drabble.
Pairing: Ryden.
Rating: PG-13
Summary:




Mind December and his hands shaking, cold and white as icicles in the sunlight as he tried to hide them in his pockets. Our breath was smoke around us as we walked, the smokey silence turning the air around us awkward in a beautiful sort of way. Here I was, fresh into my twenties, walking beside the most beautiful man in all of the world and I couldn't even tell him so. My lips wouldn't move and, as much as I wished it had been, it wasn't due to the cold outside freezing my lips shut. Instead of speaking I simply offer him a smile, one he doesn't see because he's too busy watching the road ahead of us as if something we're about to fall and block us soon - eyebrows furrowed with concentration.

He was always cute when he was mad.

He, one of my closest friends, was George Ryan Ross. His father treated him like dirt, his false siblings and distant mother treated him worse, and all I wanted to do was save him. Tell him he was important, that he meant something to me, and here I was staying silent. Inside I knew that if I admitted that there were some sort of feelings for him it would scare him off, he always liked having what was worst and most inconvenient for him, and his girlfriend would never let me live it down. Even if she drank all of my beer at home and she told me I was awesome, she'd never let me live it down.

Here we are walking through the bright city, trying to make it to the small, local coffee shop where we said we'd meet our friend Jon and I'm too wrapped up in Ryan to make sure we haven't passed it. The only sounds between us are the sounds of our shoes as they hit the sidewalk, step, step, step.

Finally I pull my gaze away, turning my attention to the street before us - the coffee shop in view. And I say, \"We're not always going to be friends, ya know.\"

Ryan looks at me for a moment, then back to the street. \"What makes you say that?\"

\"Intuition.\"

For the first time during the walk he laughs, shaking his head at me. \"Your intuition is shit, because I think we'll be friends for a while.\"

Something in my heart says otherwise but I don't say that out loud. Instead of worrying about how we'd stop being friends or what might come between us, I focus on the coffee shop door as we reach it - and the image of Jon sitting inside. A smile comes to my face and I open the door, letting Ryan enter before myself and following him to the table. Jon looks up at us with a warm and welcoming grin.

\"What took you guys so long?\"

And I keep my mouth shut.
"},{"id":"urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:localjoke:2850","link":[{"@attributes":{"rel":"alternate","type":"text\/html","href":"https:\/\/localjoke.livejournal.com\/2850.html"}},{"@attributes":{"rel":"self","type":"text\/xml","href":"https:\/\/localjoke.livejournal.com\/data\/atom\/?itemid=2850"}}],"title":"A Method to my Madness [5\/5]","published":"2012-01-20T11:23:36Z","updated":"2012-01-20T11:23:36Z","content":"Title:<\/b> A Method to my Madness
Author:<\/b> <\/a>localjoke<\/b><\/a><\/span>
Rating:<\/b> PG to NC-17, this chapter being PG-13.
Pairing:<\/b> Ryden sprinkled with Joncer, Gabilliam, and a few others.
POV:<\/b> 3rd person.
Summary:<\/b> Officer Jon Walker finds his day filled with an interesting interrogation when they save Brendon Urie, a film student at a local school, from jumping off of the Bay Bridge.
Disclaimer:<\/b> While this story is based something that I've heard actually happened, I do not own the characters what so ever.
Beta:<\/b> the ever lurking <\/a>underthehero<\/b><\/a><\/span>
Author Notes:<\/b> Based on a story of a local kid mixed with the Spill Canvas song Natalie Marie and 1cc. This chapter is hot off the press since my loverly beta finished her job early. I'm so proud :'D<\/b> Lots of crazies in this chapter, you've been warned!

Chapter 1<\/a>
Chapter 2<\/a>
Chapter 3<\/a>
Chapter 4<\/a>





Chapter 5

Brendon felt like everything around him was moving in slow motion as he walked through the police station. Every set of eyes felt like they were focused on him, every word was a comment about him, that he was being falsely accused by the masses and couldn\u2019t stop it. His mind traveled to all of those period movies where people were beheaded and he wondered if this was the modern beheading, the modern epitome of public humiliation. Lieutenant Asher\u2019s heels kicked at his ankles because his feet wouldn\u2019t walk fast enough, he couldn\u2019t make them move any faster and he couldn\u2019t bring himself to try any harder. A man walking to the hangman\u2019s noose wasn\u2019t going to walk as quickly as possible and prison was his noose. That\u2019s when luck came into play; his shoelace managed to slip under his foot and suddenly he was falling to the ground, Lieutenant Asher in tow, and that noose was a few more moments away.

That was, until two feet stopped just a few inches in front of him, then he could feel the noose around his neck. His breathing heavy, body hot, he lifted his head to the person he thought would bring the axe down against his neck \u2013 his betrayer. The guy standing before him looked a lot like Ryan, his hair better trimmed and his tank top replaced with a t-shirt and jacket.

\u201cNeed some help?\u201d He asked, voice echoing. Brendon thought he\u2019d died. He must have been dead or he must have hit his head too hard in the fall. Ryan didn\u2019t exist.

Suddenly he was being jerked up by someone, figuring Ryan must have been a mirage and now another officer was coming to take him away. Instead he found himself face to face with the man that didn\u2019t exist, the one he almost jumped off of a bridge for, with the same surprised, confused and almost happy look on his face that Brendon knew he had as well.

\u201cVictoria, this is Ryan.\u201d Spencer stated, taking off his sunglasses and nodding to his best friend who was all too entranced with Brendon at the moment. \u201cThe same Ryan that claimed his half brother, whom you know as Brendon\u2019s roommate, had created a false persona and ended up having him admitted at Langley Porter for being unstable and schizophrenic.\u201d

\u201cThe same Langley Porter that he works at when he\u2019s not at school, the same school that Brendon goes to.\u201d Alex added, earning a nod and a smile from his partner.

While all of this was going on around them, Brendon and Ryan just stared at each other for what seemed like hours. They\u2019d been so convinced they existed, then convinced they didn\u2019t, that it was hard to tell if they were really looking at each other for the first time or if the other person was just a great body double.

\u201cHi.\u201d Ryan finally spoke, chewing his bottom lip to hide a shy smile.

\u201cHey.\u201d Brendon smiled, clearing the roughness of his voice. \u201cI kinda almost jumped off a bridge because I didn\u2019t think you were real.\u201d

Victoria got the hint, reaching into her pocket for the keys to the handcuffs and releasing Brendon from them, standing back just to watch them. From the other room Jon heard Brendon\u2019s voice, heading out of the room and into the main area of the precinct to see what was going on. When his eyes caught Brendon and Ryan he smiled, catching Spencer\u2019s gaze which made both of them grin that much more. It was almost like watching a cheesy movie, except this time it wasn\u2019t two dimensional.

Brendon reached up reluctantly, drawing back briefly before his hand was too high. \u201cCan I just. I want to know you\u2019re not. Fake.\u201d

Ryan looked down to Brendon\u2019s hand and then nodded, eyes meeting the others. \u201cYeah. As long as I can do the same.\u201d

Silently Brendon agreed to the compromise, hand reaching up to touch Ryan\u2019s face as Ryan\u2019s hand did the same to his. Skin had never felt so real, breath had never felt so warm; they took their time just looking one another over as the touched biceps and chins, making sure this was finally real.

Spencer finally cleared his throat. \u201cSo hey, guys. Not to ruin your lovefest.\u201d The two broke apart, trying to seem as nonchalant as they could, despite knowing everyone saw what just happened. \u201cBut you\u2019re not free to go until we have both of your statements against Gabe so we can finally arrest him for the crimes he\u2019s committed.\u201d

And just like that they were being taken back into that white room for questioning, this time they were together.




It was two months down the line and Brendon and Ryan spent pretty much every day of their lives together, as much as they could. With the lawsuit money they\u2019d won against Gabe and Langley Porter for wrongful imprisonment they\u2019d managed to pay rent on a small studio apartment in the city for a year in advance, deciding that living together was the only option they had. Gabe was convicted of Identity Cloning, Invasion of Privacy and Art Theft of Personal Photographs and sentenced to twelve years in a federal prison, and Spencer and Jon became their closest friends. Jon continued to tell Brendon to appeal and get back into college, but he decided to work as Shane\u2019s apprentice instead \u2013 considering his best friend had earned an internship with Vax Productions and was working his way up the food chain \u2013 and everything was as close to perfect as it could get. With on exception\u2026

\u201cSo, Ry.\u201d Brendon asked, stealing his boyfriend\u2019s attention away from the free movie channels they had this month. \u201cI have a question.\u201d

Ryan turned in Brendon\u2019s arms, giving him a curious look. \u201cAnd what\u2019s the question?\u201d

\u201cWhy haven\u2019t we tried to\u2026you know.\u201d

Ryan\u2019s face flushed. \u201cWe\u2019ve been together two months.\u201d

\u201cA year if we count all the time we were supposed to be together.\u201d Brendon said with a cheeky grin, earning a playful glare from Ryan.

\u201cWhat\u2019s your point?\u201d

Brendon shrugged. \u201cWe live together. We have this whole studio to ourselves and we haven\u2019t tried to bang each other yet.\u201d

\u201cSay bang again and you\u2019ll never get any.\u201d Ryan said, this time it was his turn to grin cheekily. \u201cI guess it\u2019s not that time yet.\u201d

Brendon smirked, letting the hand he had rested on Ryan\u2019s hip slide along his abdomen, then down the front of his pants. \u201cOr we can try.\u201d

Ryan opened his mouth to protest but suddenly Brendon\u2019s hand was stroking against the material of his pants, nearly tracing the entirety of his cock through the fabric. \u201cHoly fuck.\u201d

\u201cI knew you\u2019d agree.\u201d Brendon said in a low tone, causing Ryan to shiver. It was new to him but he liked it.

His hips began to rock up against the younger man\u2019s hand asking for more, more, more and Brendon\u2019s hand did as commanded \u2013 fingers tracing the forming bulge in Ryan\u2019s pants. A hum of approval was all that slipped from Ryan\u2019s lips as his needy hips began to rock more into the touch, his own hand finding the bulge in his boyfriend\u2019s jeans and teasingly tracing the shape of it. \u201cYou get turned on too easy.\u201d

Brendon\u2019s lips curved around the older man\u2019s earlobe and caught it between his teeth, giving it a tug. \u201cYou\u2019re the one straining against your fly, asshole.\u201d

Instead of a retort, Ryan turned his head and caught Brendon\u2019s lips in a feverish, open-mouthed kiss while his hand tried to get his jeans unbuttoned in a hurry. Ryan\u2019s veins craved more \u2013 more skin, more fingertips, more depth in the kiss. Their lips moved in almost perfect harmony as Ryan sloppily managed to make quick work of Brendon\u2019s jeans, sneaking his hand into his boyfriend\u2019s boxer briefs to wrap his slim fingers around his cock. The younger man hissed with pleasure, pressing more passionately into the kiss as his hips grew needy now, rolling into his boyfriend\u2019s stilled hand and whining for motion.

Ryan pulled back from the kiss, carefully straddling Brendon\u2019s outer thighs and keeping his eyes on Brendon\u2019s face. \u201cI want to watch you fall to pieces.\u201d He said, allowing his hand to firmly tug the younger man\u2019s length.

And as if by some bizarre coincidence there was a knock at the door, causing them to almost push one another away to collect themselves. Hurriedly they straightened themselves back to decent condition, crossing their legs to hide any signs of what they might have been doing previous.

\u201cCome in!\u201d Brendon called.

\u201cTold you.\u201d Ryan retorted at last, earning the middle finger from his boyfriend.

Jon poked his head into the apartment, a cautious look on his face. \u201cHey, we\u2019re about to have a Transformers Marathon at mine and Spencer\u2019s apartment if you guys want to come over.\u201d

Ryan and Brendon offered their biggest false grins. \u201cSure, we just have to finish up a few things and we\u2019ll be over.\u201d

\u201cGreat. I\u2019ll make more popcorn!\u201d Jon said, slipping back out of the doorway and heading two doors down to where he and Spencer resided.

They both exhaled their relief when they were sure their friend was gone, the awkward air settling around them for a moment.

\u201cSo, try again?\u201d Brendon asked, wiggling his eyebrows provocatively at the other man.

\u201cMaybe next time.\u201d Ryan said with a wink, standing to his feet. \u201cBut Transformers sounds great right now.\u201d



<\/a>"},{"id":"urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:localjoke:2580","link":[{"@attributes":{"rel":"alternate","type":"text\/html","href":"https:\/\/localjoke.livejournal.com\/2580.html"}},{"@attributes":{"rel":"self","type":"text\/xml","href":"https:\/\/localjoke.livejournal.com\/data\/atom\/?itemid=2580"}}],"title":"A Method to my Madness [4\/5]","published":"2012-01-20T11:23:10Z","updated":"2012-01-20T11:28:41Z","content":"Title:<\/b> A Method to my Madness
Author:<\/b> <\/a>localjoke<\/b><\/a><\/span>
Rating:<\/b> PG to NC-17, this chapter being PG-13.
Pairing:<\/b> Ryden sprinkled with Joncer, Gabilliam, and a few others.
POV:<\/b> 3rd person.
Summary:<\/b> Officer Jon Walker finds his day filled with an interesting interrogation when they save Brendon Urie, a film student at a local school, from jumping off of the Bay Bridge.
Disclaimer:<\/b> While this story is based something that I've heard actually happened, I do not own the characters what so ever.
Beta:<\/b> the ever lurking <\/a>underthehero<\/b><\/a><\/span>
Author Notes:<\/b> Based on a story of a local kid mixed with the Spill Canvas song Natalie Marie and 1cc. This chapter is hot off the press since my loverly beta finished her job early. I'm so proud :'D<\/b> Lots of crazies in this chapter, you've been warned!

Chapter 1<\/a>
Chapter 2<\/a>
Chapter 3<\/a>



Chapter 4
It was well into the afternoon but the interrogation room was still blinding with lights. Jon and Brendon had managed to get back to the questions while the younger man seemed more relaxed, which meant the next round of interrogation would go smoothly. Notepad in hand; Jon was ready to scribble things down aside from what he\u2019d written down before. The paper read: Brendon Urie. Self-Destructive, bullied, too kind. Troubled youth with puzzling predicament. Believes \u2018Ryan\u2019 is fictional due to outside influence. Victim of cruel Prank.

\u201cNow, Brendon.\u201d Jon started, gaze lifting from the paper before him to the man on the other side of table. \u201cHow did you find out Ryan wasn\u2019t real?\u201d

Brendon\u2019s hands were lodged between his knees, feet tapping the floor as he tried to word what happened correctly. \u201cMy roommate.\u201d

\u201cGabe told you Ryan wasn\u2019t real?\u201d

Brendon shook his hand, hands slipping out to rub at his jean legs nervously. \u201cNot exactly.\u201d
Jon\u2019s eyebrow arched. \u201cCare to explain?\u201d

\u201cWell, Gabe brought a guy named William Beckett home one day months after Ryan and I stopped talking.\u201d

\u201cSo, Willia-\u201c

\u201cNo.\u201d Brendon shook his head. \u201cWilliam wasn\u2019t pretending to be Ryan.\u201d

Jon sat back in his chair, chewing on the pencil\u2019s end as he nodded at the younger man.

\u201cAlright, tell me the story.\u201d





It was the beginning of what would be Brendon\u2019s last quarter at school and Gabe brought home a thin, tall man named William. Though Brendon didn\u2019t want to admit it, William brought out the best in Gabe and the roommate he knew became nice, caring, and considerate. Gabe had even been doing more hours at the medical center he was working at, whatever it was called, just make sure the patients were cared for regularly. The older boy had undergone a transformation for the better but, as yin and yang, all good comes with bad and vice versa. While Gabe and William began to take Brendon under their arm he had a feeling that this relationship would not be good \u2013 though he liked William and how he\u2019d made Gabe, there was that nagging feeling that something bad was going to come from the two dating. He didn\u2019t know what.

A few days after meeting William, he and Brendon sat on the balcony of the small apartment and played music together. It was nice to have another guitar player around, but the decent evening instantly took a turn for the worse. In the middle of \u2018Hey There, Delilah\u2019 his phone vibrated and Brendon stopped to check it, finding a new message from the one person he didn\u2019t expect \u2013 Ryan. William noticed the look on his face and frowned.

\u201cYou okay, Urie?\u201d He asked, reaching out to pat his friend\u2019s shoulder.

\u201cYeah, it\u2019s just an old friend I don\u2019t know if I want to talk to.\u201d

William nodded his head and leaned against his guitar, strumming notes at random. \u201cRead it.\u201d

Without a protest Brendon opened the message. \u2018I have aim and we need to talk. I\u2019m ryanwitless.\u2019

\u201cI have to go. They want me to aim chat with them.\u201d Brendon said with a sigh, raising his hand for a high five. \u201cGood jam session, though?\u201d

\u201cDefinitely.\u201d William returned the high five, \u201cAnd if you see Gabe, tell him I\u2019m out here?\u201d
\u201cSure thing.\u201d

Brendon made a bee-line to his room where Gabe was laying on the bed, head shooting to Brendon with a nervous look. \u201cSorry, dude. I\u2019ll get out of your way.\u201d

Before the younger man could argue Gabe was off his bed and out of the room, leaving Brendon in a stupor. Instead of making a comment about porn he rushed to his laptop, opening up aim and signing on to the chat service \u2013 adding Ryan\u2019s screen name to his buddylist. There was a moment of hesitation before he doubled clicked the name, opening up a new IM. Now he couldn\u2019t think of what to say to the other man, staring at an empty IM box with nothing to write in it.
Before he could type, Ryan was sending him an IM which was weird, considering only seven people knew his aim screen name aside from his family \u2013 and Ryan was not one of them.


RyanWitless (5:42 pm): Hey. :]
RyanWitless (5:42 pm): Glad to see you online.
Brendon stared at the screen for a moment before typing back.
AbstractSymphany (5:44 pm): how did you get my aim screen name?
RyanWitless (5:45 pm): Gabe gave it to me.


Brendon looked around to see if Gabe was in the room, forehead furrowed in anger or confusion to which he wasn\u2019t sure.

AbstractSymphany (5:47 pm): gabe told me he doesn\u2019t know you. so how did you get my screen name?

RyanWitless (5:48 pm): I met up with him to apologize for lying. He gave me your screen name, I promise.

Ryan Witless is Typing\u2026

As if by random coincidence, Gabe walked into the room looking for something and Brendon turned to him, an angry look on his face. \u201cGabe, did you meet Ryan and not tell me?\u201d

Gabe froze in place, turning slowly toward Brendon. \u201cI. Yeah, but I didn\u2019t want to say anything because I knew it would upset you. So I gave him your aim screen name.\u201d

Brendon\u2019s face softened, taking a deep breath and nodding his head. \u201cAlright, I wanted to make sure he wasn\u2019t lying to me again.\u201d

\u201cNah, he\u2019s a good guy.\u201d Gabe shook his head, waving at his roommate before picking up a pair of sunglasses. \u201cNow have your fun. I\u2019m going to go pester William.\u201d

Brendon turned back to the computer to find Ryan was still typing, shrugging it off because maybe he was doing something on the other end.


AbstractSymphany (5:50 pm): writing a novel over there?
RyanWitless (5:51 pm): Sorry. Had to find my dog\u2019s leash so I can take him for a walk. He\u2019s all over my roommate. Lol.
AbstractSymphany (5:52 pm): you\u2019re leaving already? :(
RyanWitless (5:54 pm): Yeah, sorry. But I\u2019ll be back, I promise.
RyanWitless has signed off.


For a few minutes Brendon just sat at his desk and stared at his laptop before finally getting up to grab something to eat from the kitchen. As he fumbled around in the kitchen he noticed that Gabe and William had left, probably snuck out while he was having his short lived conversation with Ryan. Slowly he began to make himself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and that feeling of dread began to creep through him again, this time making him stop what he was doing and think about what had just happened.
Ryan. Gabe. Ryan. Dog. William. Gabe.

Slowly the pieces started to fit together in his mind and his body grew hot, hands shaking. There was no way Gabe would be pretending to be Ryan, no way. Gabe was his roommate and he would have noticed sooner if it had been Gabe but it made sense.

Gabe knew him best, Gabe knew he wanted someone special and what he was looking for and Gabe was sneaky enough to pull it off.

No. His mind shouted. No, no, no.

Hours past by and Brendon stayed in the kitchen, gazing at the floor as his mind ran through the possibility over and over again. No, he told himself, his roommate was not that kind of person. Suddenly the door opened and there was Gabe, alone and smiling while Brendon\u2019s heart fell to the open floor \u2013 face void of emotion.

\u201cHey, dude. I just finished taking William home.\u201d He stated, locking the door and tossing his jacket on the kitchen table. \u201cHow was your chat with Ryan?\u201d

A lump formed in Brendon\u2019s throat and, at that moment, he didn\u2019t know if he wanted to talk about it with Gabe or simply punch him in the face. Overreacting in this situation would be bad, but he had enough fact behind him to know now that it was Gabe. It was Gabe the whole, fucking time.

\u201cYou\u2019re Ryan.\u201d

Gabe\u2019s smiled faded and his eyes seemed guilty. \u201cNo, I\u2019m not. He\u2019s real though.\u201d

\u201cYou\u2019re Ryan, Gabe.\u201d

It all made sense. The medical clinic had so many patients that Gabe could have taken a photo of and sent to Brendon, so many people he could have stolen the name from. Somewhere out there was a real Ryan with a nice boyfriend and didn\u2019t want him.

\u201cLook, you\u2019re being weird.\u201d Gabe said, turning to head toward the bedroom. \u201cCome talk to me when you\u2019re done with this blame game.\u201d

Brendon\u2019s rage took over, rushing toward the taller man in a fit of anger and knocking him down to the ground, trying to strangle him from behind. \u201cYou\u2019re Ryan. You used me, you fucker.\u201d

\u201cGet off!\u201d Gabe shouted, struggling to get the other man off of him. \u201cYou\u2019re crazy!\u201d

Crazy. That one word hit Brendon so hard that he stopped, leaning back and quickly moving away from Gabe \u2013 as far away as he could get in the small apartment. After a moment he huffed a laugh, shaking his head.

\u201cI\u2019m crazy?\u201d He asked, \u201cYou\u2019re the one who isn\u2019t subtle with your schizophrenia. I\u2019d rather be crazy than insane.\u201d

Gabe laughed, getting up off the floor. \u201cWow, you\u2019re a child. Blaming me for being someone who doesn\u2019t care enough to visit you. You\u2019re too good.\u201d



On the other side of town Spencer and Alex were being shown to Ryan\u2019s \u2018visiting room\u2019. Normally Spencer didn\u2019t like taking people with him to meet his crazy best friend, but he figured that seeing the other man might help something in their case if anything. As they walked into the room Alex knew he\u2019d heard the name Ryan before somewhere \u2013 but wasn\u2019t sure exactly where off the top of his head \u2013 though his mind blanked out of thought when his eyes caught the sight of the man they were there to see. The kid was probably about twenty-one years old, already wearing slight stress wrinkles about his features, with messy hair and dark bags beneath his eyes that made them look browner than the hazel they were originally. While he smiled at Spencer\u2019s presence there was a saddened emptiness to the smile, something hidden behind it that Alex didn\u2019t know \u2013 though Spencer did.

\u201cHey, dude.\u201d Spencer said, taking a seat in one of the chairs the hospital had so strategically placed in the room. \u201cThis is Detective Suarez, he\u2019s my partner at the precinct and he\u2019s heard a lot about you.\u201d

\u201cHi.\u201d Ryan said sheepishly, eyes falling to his hands as they fidgeted in his lap. \u201cNice to meet you.\u201d

\u201cNice to meet you as well.\u201d Alex agreed, offering Spencer a confused look as his partner motioned for him to take a seat. He followed his orders.

\u201cSo, Ry. How are you holding up?\u201d

Ryan continued to watch his hands like they were the most interesting things in the world, avoiding eye contact with the other men in the room. \u201cAlright. Still don\u2019t want to be here with Gabe around.\u201d

Alex quirked an eyebrow at the comment. \u201cGabe?\u201d

\u201cGabe Saporta. His half brother.\u201d Spencer said, waving it off like it was nothing. \u201cHe works here when he\u2019s not off at art school.\u201d

Alex instantly froze. \u201cWait, wait. You\u2019re telling me that Brendon\u2019s roommate works here and he knows someone named Ryan?\u201d

When the words escaped into the room Spencer felt his face flush, Ryan\u2019s doing the same.

\u201cB-Brendon?\u201d The patient questioned, looking to Spencer confused. \u201cHe knows about Brendon?\u201d

\u201cBrendon was Gabe\u2019s roommate at college and he said you weren\u2019t real.\u201d

That\u2019s when that wave of realization swept of Detective Spencer Smith like it was a tidal wave. The whole time he\u2019d ignored Brendon in the interrogation room he\u2019d forgotten the one name he should have recognized the most. Ryan. Suddenly he couldn\u2019t breathe, stopped for a moment, trying to place all of it in his head. Gabe was the reason Ryan had been submitted almost two years previous, saying that Ryan had made up an imaginary boyfriend to help him cope with girls not wanting him. His half brother had been older and wanted all of the attention and when Ryan told everyone what his friend\u2019s phone number was, it ended up being Gabe\u2019s. The boy\u2019s name had been Brendon. Brendon. If Gabe had been Brendon\u2019s roommate then he would have had access to both of their photos, their information, the way they lived and communicated. It was the perfect con for Gabe to get the apartment to himself and his family\u2019s affection without any hassle.

\u201cI can\u2019t believe I didn\u2019t see it.\u201d Spencer finally spoke, voice dry. \u201cI was so pissed off by the situation, I didn\u2019t realize he\u2019d said Ryan, or knew Gabe. I left the moment he started to sound like\u2026\u201d Spencer turned to Ryan with apologetic eyes.

Ryan\u2019s mouth just sat, agape, for a moment. \u201cSo, Brendon\u2019s real?\u201d

\u201cBrendon almost jumped off the Golden Gate today because he didn\u2019t think you were real.\u201d Spencer admitted, trying to swallow around the lump in his throat. His eyes traveled to Alex and then back to Ryan with a deep inhale, standing to his feet quickly. \u201cGet your coat. They have to release you if the police need you and I need you for something.\u201d

Ryan and Alex looked confused for a moment \u2013 Ryan more confused and sad \u2013 before they both stood to their feet and Ryan rushed out of the room.

\u201cStay here. I\u2019m going to go get him released.\u201d Spencer ordered Alex before marching off after his best friend. His not crazy best friend.




In that bright little room Jon was scanning his notes silently, trying to figure out what he\u2019d do with the young man on the opposite side of the table. While he\u2019d taken a fatherly liking to the student he knew that his admittance of assault could not be overlooked \u2013 especially without having proof that Gabe had done anything to him. The story was playing in his roommate\u2019s favor but there was a nagging feeling in the pit of Jon\u2019s stomach that told him to wait. Just wait one a few minutes before deciding what to do. His eyes shifted to the clock on his wrist, then to the notes, as Brendon scratched his bicep nervously on the opposite side of the table and waited for Officer Walker to speak.

The silence was broken almost twenty minutes later when Jon looked up from his notes with a disapproving look in his eyes. \u201cBrendon, I don\u2019t know what to do with you. You admitted to an assault charge and I cannot overlook that.\u201d

Brendon\u2019s face sank, eyes filled with that worry he\u2019d had when he first arrived at the precinct. \u201cBut he was pretending to be Ryan the whole time. What was I supposed to do?\u201d

Jon shrugged, \u201cFile a complaint, report him to the police, anything. But you assault someone on charges you can\u2019t prove.\u201d

Before Jon could wrap his head around a decision, Lieutenant Asher threw the door open and was in the room again \u2013 this time with handcuffs in one hand. Jon wanted to speak up in protest but Victoria wouldn\u2019t have it. \u201cYou\u2019re under arrest for assault and attempted suicide. Now you can let me cuff you or I can knock you out and cuff you. You choose.\u201d

Slowly Brendon stood and held his arms out in front of him, Jon standing quickly as well with his brows furrowed with agitation \u2013 purposely standing in Victoria\u2019s way. \u201cYou can\u2019t barge in here like this!\u201d

\u201cI abso-fucking-lutely can. You were taking too long and this kid admitted to the offense.\u201d She said, getting as close to Jon as she could. \u201cAnd if you don\u2019t move, I\u2019ll take you in as well. Understand, Walker?\u201d

Jon huffed, standing stationary for a moment before he moved aside. He wanted to stand up for Brendon but there was nothing he could do for the young man if he was in a cell as well. He turned to see Victoria spinning Brendon and cuffing his arms behind his back, an aggressive fire in her eyes. \u201cGood. Cooperating will get you places.\u201d

Victoria began to escort Brendon out of the room, his face filled with worry and sadness as he passed Jon \u2013 eyes almost pleading for him to do something.

\u201cI\u2019ll fight for him.\u201d Jon called out, earning a laugh from Victoria.

\u201cYeah, you do that, Jon. You know I don\u2019t like criminals in my town.\u201d

And with that they disappeared into the halls of the precinct, leaving Jon in a room full of emptiness and self-pity.




Chapter 5<\/a>
<\/a>"},{"id":"urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:localjoke:2439","link":[{"@attributes":{"rel":"alternate","type":"text\/html","href":"https:\/\/localjoke.livejournal.com\/2439.html"}},{"@attributes":{"rel":"self","type":"text\/xml","href":"https:\/\/localjoke.livejournal.com\/data\/atom\/?itemid=2439"}}],"title":"Sorry for the wait, folks!","published":"2012-01-20T11:07:48Z","updated":"2012-01-20T11:07:48Z","content":"I know it's been well over the promised time for the new chapter of A Method to My Madness, but I've been without net for almost a week. I promise that I'll be updating tonight and the two final chapters will be up this morning. From there I'll be looking for Betas to Spencer and Jon's little side story and a few others I have, so if you're up for it post so in the comments!"},{"id":"urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:localjoke:2112","link":[{"@attributes":{"rel":"alternate","type":"text\/html","href":"https:\/\/localjoke.livejournal.com\/2112.html"}},{"@attributes":{"rel":"self","type":"text\/xml","href":"https:\/\/localjoke.livejournal.com\/data\/atom\/?itemid=2112"}}],"title":"Prompt Listing:","published":"2012-01-10T01:00:48Z","updated":"2012-01-10T01:00:48Z","content":"
<\/center>
Fan Fiction Prompts and Pairing Ideas
brought to you by <\/a>localjoke<\/b><\/a><\/span><\/div>


Prompts:<\/span>
-Old Western<\/b>. Gay cowboys were not unheard of in the old west, considering there were no women on cattle runs. This would be a neat prompt to see explored.<\/span>
-Bartenders and Drunks<\/b>. Essentially a modern day Cowboy and Indian thing - There's the bartender who can't drink on the clock and the drunk faithful who comes to tell the bartender their story every week. Run with that one. ;)<\/span>
-College Dayz<\/b>. Some of the writers out there are actual college students, so why not take your knowledge and run with it? Write a story about one of your favorite pairings in a college situation.<\/span>
-Film related<\/b>. Behind the scenes, steamy relations between the director and the make-up artist. A romance between the producer and the star that compromises the entire production. It's endless possibility.<\/span>
More to come.<\/b>


Pairings:<\/span> Not so pleasant and not so conventional - sure as hell ain't normal but we deal, we deal.<\/i><\/span>
-Ryan Ross and Andy Soukal<\/b>. Randy? Yes.<\/span>
-Brendon Urie and Nate Ruess<\/b>. Bress. Think about the lip action.<\/span>
-Spencer and Nate Ruess<\/b>. Spruess. Pretty eyes all over the place. Hot damn.<\/span>
-Dallon and Ian<\/b>. Dallan. C'mon. Keep it varied here!<\/span>
More to come.<\/b>



Now if you have any ideas to toss in the salad, please add your 'leaves' to the comments. Forgive me for the creep!Salad metaphor, it's there to be creepy and inspire people to comment.

And NO knocking people for their ideas. You may not like it, but someone else might. Please, be courteous of other people's different ideas.<\/b>

<\/a>"},{"id":"urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:localjoke:1840","link":[{"@attributes":{"rel":"alternate","type":"text\/html","href":"https:\/\/localjoke.livejournal.com\/1840.html"}},{"@attributes":{"rel":"self","type":"text\/xml","href":"https:\/\/localjoke.livejournal.com\/data\/atom\/?itemid=1840"}}],"title":"A Method to my Madness [3\/5]","published":"2012-01-04T03:18:42Z","updated":"2012-01-04T03:18:42Z","category":[{"@attributes":{"term":"ryden"}},{"@attributes":{"term":"a method to my madness"}}],"content":"Title:<\/b> A Method to my Madness
Author:<\/b> <\/a>localjoke<\/b><\/a><\/span>
Rating:<\/b> PG to NC-17, this chapter being PG-13.
Pairing:<\/b> Ryden sprinkled with Joncer, Gabilliam, and a few others.
POV:<\/b> 3rd person.
Summary:<\/b> Officer Jon Walker finds his day filled with an interesting interrogation when they save Brendon Urie, a film student at a local school, from jumping off of the Bay Bridge.
Disclaimer:<\/b> While this story is based something that I've heard actually happened, I do not own the characters what so ever.
Beta:<\/b> the ever lurking <\/a>underthehero<\/b><\/a><\/span>
Author Notes:<\/b> Based on a story of a local kid mixed with the Spill Canvas song Natalie Marie and 1cc. This chapter is hot off the press since my loverly beta finished her job early. I'm so proud :'D<\/b> Lots of crazies in this chapter, you've been warned!

Chapter 1<\/a>
Chapter 2<\/a>



Chapter 3

The precinct\u2019s \u2018food court\u2019, if you\u2019d call it that, had seemed far too busy for this time of day. Everyone and their distant cousin seemed to be grabbing food which made Jon worry \u2013 considering he had to get food to the poor kid in the interrogation room. It could take half an hour to get through the line and, by then, Brendon would have died of boredom or starvation, though Jon didn\u2019t care to figure which. As he made his way toward the very back of the line he found himself being grabbed and pulled into a spot. When his shaken mind registered he found Spencer standing there with the tiniest of smirks on his face.

\u201cI secured you a place in line, good lookin\u2019.\u201d He said, gently nudging Jon\u2019s side with his elbow. \u201cIt\u2019s what boyfriends do.\u201d

Jon gave Spencer a look, lips parting to speak before a smile caught them instead. It was the first time the younger man had acknowledged that they were, well, technically dating despite the entire precinct knowing the secret.

\u201cYou just said boyfriend.\u201d

Spencer\u2019s face turned unreadable behind his sunglasses. \u201cAnd you\u2019re pushing your luck, Walker.\u201d

Jon chuckled, stealing Spencer\u2019s hand in his own. \u201cSo, how are you holding up?\u201d

Spencer sighed and shook his head. His troubled best friend was not a topic he wanted to talk about with his boyfriend, but he knew he had to explain to his colleague eventually. \u201cNot great. All I can remember is\u2026\u201d

\u201cAh. You\u2019re worried.\u201d

Spencer glared, Jon could tell by the way his brows furrowed above his sunglasses that he was glaring. \u201cI\u2019m not worried about this kid. I just don\u2019t want to deal with this story again.\u201d
\u201cHe\u2019s a good kid, as your best friend still is.\u201d Jon spoke softly, worried he might piss his boyfriend off by talking about something so deep to him. \u201cHow long since you\u2019ve paid him a visit?\u201d

\u201cHalf a year.\u201d

\u201cYou should go see him. Then come back and deal with this crap.\u201d Jon reached past Spencer to grab two sandwiches from the display, shrugging a shoulder. \u201cWe need you here with a clear head.\u201d

Spencer shrugged.

The rest of the line was long and silent, the two of them off in their own thoughts until they reached the register where, as always, Jon made sure he paid for everything they\u2019d ordered. Spencer liked that he was kind-hearted, but sometimes he was a little too soft for his job \u2013 the perfect good cop. Once Spencer\u2019s coffee was in hand and Jon\u2019s sandwiches were bagged they separated, reluctantly.

\u201cThink about it, Spence.\u201d Jon said, giving his boyfriend\u2019s bicep a gentle squeeze. \u201cIt might be good for you.\u201d

\u201cI will.\u201d Spencer offered, kissing his boyfriend\u2019s cheek. \u201cAnd, if you\u2019re feeding him, we\u2019re not bringing him home. The last thing we need is another stray.\u201d He added with a laugh.

Jon made his way back to the interrogation room as Spencer branched back to his desk where Alex stood, waiting for him. That feeling of dread settled in his stomach as he neared his partner, lifting his coffee to his lips to look busy though his partner\u2019s face was troubled.

\u201cI told Victoria so she didn\u2019t mark you up.\u201d Alex admitted as soon as the other man was in hearing range. \u201cI\u2019m sorry, but you know how intimidating she is.\u201d

Spencer shook his head. \u201cDon\u2019t worry about it.\u201d

Alex\u2019s face went from troubled to confused so quickly it almost scared Spencer. \u201cDon\u2019t\u2026worry?\u201d
Spencer looked around his desk for his car keys, snatching them up and nodding toward the door. \u201cLet\u2019s go for a ride. We\u2019ll say it was for information.\u201d





Jon returned to his post to find Victoria standing there, off to one side with her arms crossed, watching Brendon like a hawk. The look on her face was a mix of anger, disapproval and worry all mixed together \u2013 though her facial expressions were limited on the job. Jon slipped back into his chair, pulling out a sandwich and offering it to the, now frightened, young man on the other side of the table. Victoria would probably have a talk with him about it later, but Jon didn\u2019t care about what she had to say as long as Brendon was healthy and well. In fact, Jon had grown rather fond of Brendon in a fatherly sort of way, he was a good kid who seemed like he needed someone at the moment.

\u201cThanks.\u201d Brendon said, seeming uncomfortable with Victoria\u2019s presence. He picked up the sandwich and took tiny pieces off, eyes constantly trailing off in the direction of Victoria like a child afraid of the school bully sitting at their table.

\u201cThis is Lieutenant Asher. I promise you she\u2019s not here to worry you.\u201d Jon stated, eyes darting to Victoria with furrowed brows. \u201cShe was only in here to make sure you were alright, but now she has to go talk to Andy.\u201d

Victoria scoffed, shaking her head at Jon\u2019s move before silently making her way out of the room \u2013 heading back into the room on the other side of the glass to observe some more, leaving Jon and Brendon in silence again.

\u201cAlright.\u201d Jon said, unwrapping his sandwich and taking a bite, making sure he chewed and swallowed before trying to speak again. \u201cSo, were you kicked out of school or did you drop out?\u201d

Brendon looked up at Jon, then back down to his sandwich. \u201cI was kicked out for poor grades. Now I\u2019m living with a friend.\u201d

\u201cWho\u2019s the friend?\u201d He asked, trying to make polite conversation as they ate. \u201cIs it someone you know well?\u201d

Brendon nodded. \u201cShane.\u201d

\u201cAh.\u201d

\u201cHe\u2019s a great friend who\u2019s helped me through so much. That\u2019s why I was defensive earlier, he\u2019s all I have.\u201d Brendon said softly.

\u201cNo parents?\u201d

Brendon shook his head. \u201cDisowned me when they found out I liked guys.\u201d

Jon paused for a moment, putting down his sandwich. \u201cParents can sometimes forget their child is their genes and use their flaws against them. I know how you feel on that one.\u201d

\u201cYou were\u2026disowned?\u201d Brendon asked, eyes focused on Jon with the first calm face he\u2019d seen across the young man\u2019s features all day. \u201cFor being gay?\u201d

\u201cNot for being gay,\u201d He said, \u201cFor not wanting to be an athlete like my father wanted. I wanted to be a therapist and my dad shipped me off to California and told me to pay for college myself. Here I stand, a Police Psychologist.\u201d

Brendon\u2019s eyebrows furrowed for a moment before they relaxed. \u201cAt least you made it.\u201d

\u201cI did, and you can make it too.\u201d Jon said, picking his sandwich back up and taking a deep breath. \u201cThere will always be low points, hard times, and trials. If you let them get you down, that\u2019s when you lose.\u201d





On the other side of town Spencer and Alex were pulling up outside of Langley Porter Psychiatric Hospital. Spencer could feel the burning in his chest when he saw the building, chewing his lip in hopes that he wouldn\u2019t get choked up entering the building. The air in the car was different and Alex could feel the instant change as they pulled into the parking lot, though he knew if he brought it up Spencer would be defensive \u2013 and that was the last thing he needed right now. They parked and climbed out of the car, heading into the main entrance-way of the building. Spencer\u2019s feet felt heavy, his head was light and his chest ached because he\u2019d abandoned his best friend here. Some friend.

The receptionist looked up at the two men, dressed in their police uniforms, and her features screwed up in worry. \u201cHello, Officers. Is everything alright?\u201d

\u201cYes, ma\u2019am. We\u2019re just here on a visit, nothing serious.\u201d Spencer stated. The woman looked relieved almost immediately.

\u201cOh good, who are you visiting?\u201d

Spencer took a deep breath and replied. \u201cRyan Ross.\u201d

<\/a>"},{"id":"urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:localjoke:1778","link":[{"@attributes":{"rel":"alternate","type":"text\/html","href":"https:\/\/localjoke.livejournal.com\/1778.html"}},{"@attributes":{"rel":"self","type":"text\/xml","href":"https:\/\/localjoke.livejournal.com\/data\/atom\/?itemid=1778"}}],"title":"A Method to my Madness [2\/5]","published":"2012-01-03T09:15:24Z","updated":"2012-01-04T03:21:10Z","content":"Title:<\/b> A Method to my Madness
Author:<\/b> <\/a>localjoke<\/b><\/a><\/span>
Rating:<\/b> PG to NC-17, this chapter being PG-13.
Pairing:<\/b> Ryden sprinkled with Joncer, Gabilliam, and a few others.
POV:<\/b> 3rd person.
Summary:<\/b> Officer Jon Walker finds his day filled with an interesting interrogation when they save Brendon Urie, a film student at a local school, from jumping off of the Bay Bridge.
Disclaimer:<\/b> While this story is based something that I've heard actually happened, I do not own the characters what so ever.
Beta:<\/b> the ever lurking <\/a>underthehero<\/b><\/a><\/span>
Author Notes:<\/b> Based on a story of a local kid mixed with the Spill Canvas song Natalie Marie and 1cc. Thanks to anyone who reads, it's appreciated. I'll try to update it every Saturday, if possible. Also, my apologies to all of those who commented! I was visiting family for New Years so I couldn't reply as soon as I would have liked. IP logging is off and I'm home for now! Thank you for all of your kind comments!<\/b>

Chapter 1<\/a>




Chapter 2


The room fell silent again as Officer Walker tried to make sense of the story he was being told. The way that the kid told the story he didn\u2019t seem to have multiple personalities and, even if he had them, most schizophrenics never let their personalities interlock with one another. There were instances he had read about in his psychology class where the personalities were aware of one another and even communicated, but the people who were involved were more psychotic than Brendon appeared to be. Jon wasn\u2019t sure if he should be wary of the kid because he could be dangerous or try to figure out what else could explain \u2018Ryan\u2019 and how he \u2018Wasn\u2019t real\u2019.

\u201cShane was your best friend?\u201d He asked curiously, earning a nod from the stranger whom had slipped back into his prior silence again. He seemed tired but they couldn\u2019t let him leave just yet. \u201cWas he Ryan?\u201d

Brendon\u2019s eyes shot up to Jon, angry and hurt by the accusation. \u201cHow dare you? Shane was the only person I could trust.\u201d

\u201cSometimes people close to you can betray you.\u201d Jon stated, trying his best to sound warm about it. \u201cBut he wasn\u2019t that type?\u201d

\u201cGod, no.\u201d Brendon said, eyes falling back to the table as if he was slipping back into the memories again.

In the other room Vicky was growing impatient; she\u2019d always been that way. Suarez looked on like it was public television to him, waiting for them to arrest the suspect and throw him in a mental ward until he was no longer a danger to himself. Anyone who wanted to jump off the San Francisco Bay Bridge was a danger to themselves, end of story. It could have been the heat of the small room they were in that made them so negative, or maybe they were angry for feeling sympathy toward someone that tried to jump off of a bridge, but something was beginning to wear at their nerves.

Vicky walked over to a mini fridge that sat off to the side of the room, pulling out a bottle of water for herself. \u201cI take it Spencer\u2019s not coming back for a while.\u201d

Alex reached over and snatched the water bottle with a smile, unscrewing the lid. \u201cNo way,\u201d He took a drink as Vicky glared at him. \u201cAn officer removes themselves from a case when they feel emotionally connected. It\u2019s just logical.\u201d

She returned to the mini fridge to grab another water bottle, this time staying out of Alex\u2019s reach. \u201cWould you be up for sharing the story with me, so no one gets written up for not being present?\u201d

It was a tricky move to pull on someone, but Victoria Asher had always had a way of getting to the bottom of things when she had to. It was the way she was raised, the way her father had trained her to be, and Alex stood no chance against her if he said no. Yes was always the correct answer with her.

\u201cIt was a couple of years ago. Spencer\u2019s friend had been having these delusions that he was dating some guy,\u201d He began, taking another drink from the bottle as he watched Brendon through the tinted glass. \u201cHe and Spencer were supposed to meet him, but he made up a false address to accompany the false person he\u2019d come up with. Went crazy when they got there and his imaginary boyfriend wasn\u2019t around and attacked Spence, saying it was his fault and he\u2019d lied to him the entire time. Spence had to knock the guy out to get him off and drove him to the crazy house. The doctor told him he was a schizophrenic.\u201d

Victoria fell quiet, finding her eyes locking on Brendon as well for some reason. \u201cThat\u2019s really fucked up.\u201d

\u201cYeah,\u201d He started, turning to the woman who now stood beside him. \u201cLet\u2019s hope this one doesn\u2019t go crazy and try to hurt Jon or I\u2019ll take him out myself.\u201d
With that Alex walked out of the room to take a break, leaving Victoria to pay attention to the made-for-TV movie paying on the other side of the glass. The story had tugged at her the wrong way and she hoped that this kid wasn\u2019t as crazy as Spencer\u2019s friend had been \u2013 or worse things would happen to him.

\u201cAfter that I started paying attention to Ryan all the time, I didn\u2019t care about school or working on films anymore.\u201d Brendon admitted dryly, tasting how bitter that choice had been on his tongue. \u201cI thought that after all of this time I\u2019d met the one person that was right for me and I didn\u2019t care about anything else.\u201d

Jon had managed to sneak in a pad of paper and a pen, writing down interesting pieces of Brendon\u2019s story. It had been a year since he\u2019d stopped his therapy to become an officer of the law, but this case wasn\u2019t like the others had been \u2013 this wasn\u2019t a black and white good or bad guy story, it was something deeper and in need of analyzing.

\u201cDid you drop out of school?\u201d He asked, looking up from his notepad to look at Brendon clearly when he replied.

\u201cNo. Almost. It\u2019s a long story.\u201d

\u201cBrendon,\u201d He stated, setting the pen and paper down in his lap. \u201cI\u2019m here to listen. Tell me what happened.\u201d







A few months after Ryan showed up in his life Brendon had become obsessed with him to an unhealthy level. When people would ask him about the future he\u2019d always mention him and Ryan ending up together, how many dogs they would have, where he and Ryan would go on vacation after his first big film. Shane knew that it was unhealthy and reminded Brendon constantly that he still hadn\u2019t met the man, but Brendon told him that they didn\u2019t need that to be in love \u2013 love ran deeper than physical interaction. They even began to talk over aim as a means of contact every night, just for the speaking to one another. Ryan was a party kid with a hard life, a kind heart and an open mind which was more than he\u2019d found in most people.

Even though he had not met Ryan just yet he felt like he should thank his roommate for hooking him up. It seemed easy enough until the day he actually brought it up to Gabe.

They were in the kitchen and Gabe was making some food between rapping with whatever 90\u2019s hip hop he was listening to so, naturally, Brendon slipped in and leaned against the counter with a grin on his face. It took the other man a few moment before he finally noticed his roommate there \u2013 taking out one of his ear buds with a curious look on his face.

\u201cWhat\u2019s with the grin?\u201d He asked, nodding toward Brendon before turning back to his food preparation. \u201cThis isn\u2019t about that set up I was supposed to make is it?\u201d

Brendon was about to speak but the word \u2018supposed\u2019 hit him the wrong way, smile fading into a blank stare. \u201cSupposed to? You didn\u2019t hook me up with Ryan?\u201d

Gabe turned away from his food, laughing softly to himself for a moment. \u201cI\u2019ve never met a Ryan. Must be a creepy stalker who found your number on facebook.\u201d

\u201cGabe, this isn\u2019t funny.\u201d

Gabe shrugged. \u201cWho\u2019s laughing?\u201d He said, slipping his ear bud back into his ear.
Brendon\u2019s face was twisted in complete confusion, trying to make sense of the conversation \u2013 maybe Shane was right to worry. It was in that instant that his heart sank to his stomach; Ryan had lied to him and he had let himself be blinded enough by the lie to see any possible flaws. Slowly he proceeded back toward the bedroom, reaching for his phone to call the person that had lied to him. Ryan.

The phone rang a few times and he waited patiently, trying to think of what he\u2019d say when his prior love interest picked up. Before he could for a thought someone picked up on the other side of the phone and hung up quickly, causing Brendon to frown. Again he called the number, same problem occurred. After three tries the calls when to voicemail which, oddly enough, was the automated woman saying the person was not available \u2013 so he left a message.

\u201cLook Ryan, I just talked to Gabe and he said he doesn\u2019t know you. I don\u2019t know what you\u2019re getting at or how you got my number, but I want answers.\u201d

Inside his chest rage began to build, a heat surging though his chest and, before he knew what had happened, his phone was flying across the room and hitting the carpet hard. He laid back against his bed and huffed, mind racing with more thoughts than he knew how to process, before sitting up again and grabbing the nearest hoodie that he could find, his keys and his phone to go out on a walk.






\"After that my grades went down the drain.\" Brendon spoke to the quiet room as Jon scribbled in his notepad. \"I just couldn't focus. Ryan never called me or sent me texts after that and things just went on a downhill spiral.\"

Jon had a look on his face that was sympathetic, but hurt all at once. Deep inside his heart ached for the poor boy, but there were so many pieces to the puzzle that still didn't fit right. Gazing up to the clock he noticed they'd been at this for a few hours now, sighing and looking across the table to Brendon.

\"I can't release you, but do you want something to eat?\" He asked gently, offering the college student a hopeful little smile. \"It'll probably help after your bridge incident and the precinct has fairly decent turkey and swiss.\"

Brendon looked down at his hands, toying with them shyly for a moment before nodding. \"Please, that would be great.\"

Jon nodded and made his way out of the room, leaving Brendon alone to shake in what he thought was complete privacy - unaware that Victoria was on the other side of the glass, determined look on her face and eyes scanning him. In her mind, this kid was just a ticking time bomb waiting for his release to head right back to that bridge again and jump.

<\/a>"},{"id":"urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:localjoke:1464","link":[{"@attributes":{"rel":"alternate","type":"text\/html","href":"https:\/\/localjoke.livejournal.com\/1464.html"}},{"@attributes":{"rel":"self","type":"text\/xml","href":"https:\/\/localjoke.livejournal.com\/data\/atom\/?itemid=1464"}}],"title":"A Method to my Madness [1\/5]","published":"2011-12-25T09:47:42Z","updated":"2012-01-04T03:21:49Z","category":[{"@attributes":{"term":"ryden"}},{"@attributes":{"term":"a method to my madness"}}],"content":"Title:<\/b> A Method to my Madness
Author:<\/b> <\/a>localjoke<\/b><\/a><\/span>
Rating:<\/b> PG to NC-17, this chapter being PG-13.
Pairing:<\/b> Ryden sprinkled with Joncer, Gabilliam, and a few others.
POV:<\/b> 3rd person.
Summary:<\/b> Officer Jon Walker finds his day filled with an interesting interrogation when they save Brendon Urie, a film student at a local school, from jumping off of the Bay Bridge.
Disclaimer:<\/b> While this story is based something that I've heard actually happened, I do not own the characters what so ever.
Beta:<\/b> the ever lurking <\/a>underthehero<\/b><\/a><\/span>
Author Notes:<\/b> Based on a story of a local kid mixed with the Spill Canvas song Natalie Marie and 1cc. Thanks to anyone who reads, it's appreciated. I'll try to update it every Saturday, if possible.


Chapter 1

The room is lit by a bright, centered light that seems to leak out into every corner. In the center of this room sits a table with two dark figures on either side; to the left of the room is a two way mirror, the kind you see police shows and detective movies when they’re interrogating people. On the other side of that mirror stand three people, Detectives Smith and Suarez and their boss Lieutenant Asher all monitoring the conversation happening on the other side of the one way glass. The only thing missing is that cup of water in the center of the table sitting awkward and unused and the scene would be perfected.

The man being interrogated was found on the old San Francisco Bay Bridge, about to jump to his death when they found him. As protocol the station had to bring him into custody and ask him a few questions, their own way to trying to ‘protect the people of their city’. When they caught him he didn’t protest, didn’t try to jump, he only said ‘thank you’ as Detective Smith helped him back onto the stable side of the bridge and spoke little to no words since. The man was Brendon Urie, barely into his twenties, a troubled young man trying to escape a situation that shouldn’t have happened to anyone let alone him.

“Tell us what happened, Mr. Urie.” Officer Jon Walker, head of interrogation, asked the troubled kid. “We can’t let you go until we’re sure you’re safe.”

They always said Jon could make anyone talk with his kind disposition. He was one of the best cops on the city force because he was once a therapist, he knew how people worked.

“Not much to tell.” Brendon said, clearing his unused throat and shrugging. “You’d think I was crazy anyway.”

Jon leaned forward in his chair, elbows on his knees to let the other man know he was listening. “Mothers killing their children, teens killing teens, those are crazy situations.”

“I guess.”

Jon sighed and looked to the floor, trying to think of ways to crack this kid. “We can sit here all day to make sure you don’t hurt yourself again, or you can talk to me about why you were on that bridge. It’s your choice.”

Brendon rubbed his bicep for a moment, eyes locking with the table as if he was focusing on something that wasn’t there. That imaginary, awkward cup of water would do.

“I was trying to get away from him, for good.”

Jon’s gaze lifted to the man opposite him, then to the one way glass, then back to the man.

“Get away from him?” He asked.

On the other side of the glass Detective Smith and Detective Suarez exchanged glances, trying to make sense of what had just been said in the other room. The young man had seemed troubled, after all.

“His name is Ryan.” Brendon started with a sigh, “Well, that’s the crazy part. He never really existed in the first place.”

Jon arched his eyebrow but motioned a hand for the younger man to continue his story. “Go on.”
Lieutenant Asher crossed her arms, eyes shooting to the two detectives accompanying her. “An attempted suicide over someone who doesn’t exist? Man, the world’s fucked up.”

“You’re telling me, Vic. Imaginary friends could mean schizophrenia.” Spencer commented coldly, turning away from the window for a moment. “I’m going to go get coffee. Keep me posted.” With that he left the room, though Suarez knew it was for personal reasons – not coffee.

“Do you know what’s up with your partner, Alex?” Vicky questioned, clearly frustrated. There was a long moment of silence before Alex turned to look at her, taking a deep breath.

“His best friend was a schizophrenic. He was committed last year after imagining some kid up in his head.”

In the other room Brendon was beginning to talk in broken sentences, selectively telling portions of the story that lead him to the bridge that day. They were simple pieces but Jon had managed to win trust from Brendon in a strange way, commenting here and there to let Brendon know that he was listening. Brendon shivered, still, even though he’d been in a warm room for the past hour or so.

“I can’t believe he’s not real.” Brendon kept repeating, devastated, eyes never straying from the table. “He was never real.”

Jon was leaning over the table now that he knew the kid was harmless to anyone else, focused on the stranger he knew far too much about now. He felt sorry for the kid and what he could muster from his confessions, though it seemed like the only person Brendon should have been worried about was himself.

“Alright, Brendon, you’re doing great. But we need the full story before we can let you leave.” He said, hoping that the young man would cooperate with him. “Can you start from the beginning for me?”




It was two years before the bridge incident, Brendon was starting his sophomore year in college and everything was going just as planned. The courses for film making were challenging enough and he’d managed to clock seventy six hours of experience on sets through others – which was better than most students in his class. His roommates were all really great, except Gabe who had his severe asshole moments, and he managed to get Dean’s Honor Roll two quarters in a row. Life was lining up before his eyes and all he had to do was walk the path before him and he knew he’d accomplish great things. Maybe that was why Ryan happened – nothing is supposed to feel as right as things did. Life never hands you a bowl of ice cream without something tainting that ice cream, it just didn’t happen, at least not for Brendon.

Tuesday, his night class, two weeks in and Brendon gets a text message from a strange number, the person claiming to be a ‘mutual friend of Gabe’s’. A few weeks prior his roommate had told him that he’d get him a cute guy’s number, but he figured he’d be the one to text them instead of vice versa.

‘Hey, I’m a friend of Gabe’s. Name’s Ryan’ the text read, causing Brendon to quirk a brow.
He typed back, ‘Are you the cute guy Gabe told me I’d meet?’ and sent it.

For some reason the text message didn’t feel right to him, but he played along because he figured it was time to branch out and meet new people anyway.

The day finished up and ‘Ryan’ had yet to reply back, so Brendon figured the stranger wasn’t for him. It wasn’t that he needed any sort of love life at the moment; he and his best friend had been pretty busy making music videos on the side so anything stealing his focus would have been bad anyway. But as the night drew on and morning came, Brendon found himself lying awake in bed and trying to picture what ‘Ryan’ would have looked like. Was he tall? Was he a stubbly type or a clean cut, take home to the family that accepts your homosexuality type? The questions kept him awake until his phone vibrated again.

Brendon instant looked over to see if the sound woke Gabe up, but his roommate’s back was turned to him. So he reached over to his bedside table and unlocked his phone screen, finding one new message from that same strange number earlier.

With a smile he opened the message. ‘I don’t know about me being cute, but Gabe showed me your pictures. You’re pretty cute.’

Suddenly his stomach was filled with butterflies for the first time since…ever. ‘Hey, that’s not fair. I want to see you, since you’ve seen me’ he replied, the smile on his lips curling up even wider.

Again he waited for a message, but it came sooner than he’d expected. When he opened the message there was a black and white image inside of a messy haired guy with a white band tank top on. The man seemed skinnier than Brendon would have liked, but the shaggy hair and button nose more than made up for it. Beneath the photo Ryan had wrote, ‘Not cute. Does this mean we’re fair? :]’.

Brendon chuckled and wrote back, ‘Yes, but I disagree. You’re a seven.’

Before he could read the next message he’d fallen fast asleep. The next morning he awoke to find that Ryan had left him three messages.

‘I’ll take a seven any day, if an eight is interested in me’.

‘Fall asleep?’

‘Sweet dreams. Text me when you’re up.’

The next day Brendon smiled far too much and Shane was the first person to notice the change. It was not that he wasn’t a content person, but he was normally at a more subtle level with his happiness unless he had met someone in a romantic way. His entire disposition seemed different than normal and he didn’t seem to complain about the trash not being taken out like he normally would. Gabe seemed pretty happy not to be nagged for once, but when Shane came to pick Brendon up for a day of video shooting it seemed like no one else saw the difference.
Shane noticed because he knew his best friend better than anyone else.

As they loaded Brendon’s equipment into his trunk Shane could hear Brendon humming to himself, causing him to perk up and glance over at his friend with a confused look on his face. The younger man didn’t seem to notice the look and, in fact, was lost in his own world of happiness to hear the other scoff and chuckle at him. What snapped him out of his mind was the sound of his friend’s voice.

“You got laid last night, didn’t you?” He asked, happily disbelieving smile on his face. “Was he any good?”

Brendon stopped, eyes wide as a deer’s as they stare into headlights, his cheeks flushed with embarrassment at the accusation. “N-no, what makes you say that?” He asked as he slipped the light kit into the truck and closed it.

“You can’t lie to me, Urie. I’m your best friend.” Shane said, opening the driver side door and slipped inside, Brendon doing the same. “And you at least are interested in someone.”

“Interested, yes.” Brendon said blatantly, giving Shane a disapproving look. “Laid, not yet. I haven’t even met the guy.”

“You haven’t met him? Then how do you know you like him?” He asked, starting the car up and quickly getting it onto the main road.

“Gabe gave him my number and he sent me a picture.”

Shane cringed. “Please tell me he had clothes on.”

“Of course he did!” Brendon scoffed, smacking the older man in the arm, “You don’t send nudes to strangers!”

“Well, unless Hayley William’s gets a hold of your phone and sends them to the entire senior class.” Shane said in spite of the smack, cackling to himself.

Brendon glared daggers at Shane, hoping they would pierce him in vain. “Let’s not talk about that.”

Shane sighed. “Could have been worse,” Ignoring the look he’d earned from the other man he continued, “But do you at least have a name?”

“Ryan.”

“Ryan, what?” He asked curiously, glancing over at Brendon the moment he had a chance. The look overtaking Brendon’s features answering his question, guilty and uncertain. “No last name? That’s a little odd, don’t you think?”

Brendon shrugged, looking out of the passenger window as they pulled up to their shoot location. “Meh, I can always ask him for it later.”

The shoot went as well as they could have hoped it to, considering the actors were terrible – thanks S.F. Casting – and the weather was pretty terrible. Whenever Shane would look away from his camera he caught Brendon sending text messages to whom he guessed was Ryan, shaking his head and letting it go. Shane and Brendon had been best friends since freshman year of high-school and, in those six years, he’d seen Brendon date three people – the last being two years before. As much as he wanted to protest for the sake of professionalism, he knew that it was time for Brendon to see someone again as much as the other man would disagree.

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Panic! Quizzle Tier 1<\/i><\/b> - You
Fondest Panic! memory(general):<\/b>
Fondest Panic! Memory(interview):<\/b>
Funniest Panic! Quote to you(Zack Hall counts):<\/b>
Favorite Panic! Member(Any from 2004 to now):<\/b>
Favorite song and favorite video:<\/b>


Panic! Quizzle Tier 2<\/i><\/b> - General Ed.
Name the original 2005-2009 bandmemebers:<\/b>
The bandmembers 2010-now:<\/b>
Original bassist of Panic! At The Disco:<\/b>
What was the name of the band, formed by two ex-Panic! members, in 2008\/2009?<\/b>
What were the bands that Panic!'s current bassist and guitarist came from?<\/b>


Panic! Quizzle Tier 3<\/i><\/b> - History
What was the first *official* fansite of Panic! from 2005-2007?<\/b>
Who inspired Ryan Ross to write \"But It's Better If You Do\"?<\/b>
Jon Walker missed an important event to join Panic! on their first tour, do you know what it is?<\/b>
What object did front man Brendon Urie get hit in the face with in 2006?<\/b>
Ryan Ross and Spencer Smith didn't start Panic! first, what was their original group together(with Panic!'s first bassist)?<\/b>


Panic! Quizzle Tier 4<\/i><\/b> - Theater
Panic's first headlining tour was with a punk\/cabaret band called 'The...<\/b>
Panic's most theatrical tour was:<\/b>
To debut Pretty.Odd. Panic! headlined what popular tour?<\/b>
Panic! wasn't always famous; the first tour Panic! had ever had was with what fellow FBR band in the lead?<\/b>


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