i realized that i haven't made big posts about berlin OR portugal with pictures and everything, even though i normally do. i still want to do them, but recently i've been really tired and busy. maybe i'll do one tonight if i'm crazy and decide not to sleep tonight.

bascially; i have to write 2 research papers and prepare 2 presentations, and each one involves a crazy amount of reading, writing, and research. it's weird, cause you would think with only 3 classes and only having those 3 classes on 2 days, it'd be manageable, but it's almost worse. you think you have more time for things, when really you don't. before you know it things are coming in and crashing down before you're ready for them.

this semester is done in a month. how the fuck has that happened? i don't know. it's too weird to think about. thanksgiving is this week, and the only time it crosses my mind is when my parents bring it up to me. which is really weird - i fucking love thanksgiving & christmas, this whole holiday season really. instead i'm having one of the most stressful semesters of my life. my professors expect me to write papers that should be good enough for publishing. i mean what the shit? any little mistake could cost me big time, and it's driving me insane. i'm trying not to stress or think about it but lmfao, i'm here to study. sob. i was so looking forward to this being an easier semester.

i also realize, christmas is about a month away. what what what the fuck. i don't have good presents for my family yet. i'm going to have to go shopping this weekend. i also have to go to the anne frank house, the rembrant house, the house of bols and the tropenmuseum all before i go. that should be doable, especially if i do most of them in one day. i was thinking about this weekend, going on a museum splurg and getting tibetan food for dinner while breanna was in prauge. that way i don't have to worry about her judging me for eating by myself for dinner. or spending money on going out. ha!


uhmmmmm yeah. that's my life i guess?/? being crazy happy about traveling and then crazy stressed about school. yep!


oh yeah i have an application to study skeletal remains in peru in july i need to fill that in and email it back asap........ i doubt i'll get the internship since i don't know any spanish but it's worth a shot.
yeah that's another thing i need to do
find an internship or job over the summer, lord knows i need me the moneys.

OH YEAH AND I'M KINDA SICK. again. i think. my head doesn't hurt but it feels clogged... and my ears feel like they're filled with wax and my throat hurts and i keep hacking up snot. from my throat. it's gross.

and i want to recommend this manga to everyone. because it's dumb. and it has a short anime. which is dumber. FANTASTICO.

OK SO HERE'S MY SCHEDULE FOR THE NEXT 10 DAYS:

TODAY:
-Work on research & homework.
-Leave at 10PM to Amstel station, board a bus headed for Berlin and leave at 11:15PM.

TOMORROW:
-Arrive at Berlin at about 9:00-9:30AM. Go to our hostel, drop our stuff of, and explore the city for the next three days!

SUNDAY THE 14TH:
-Go back to the ZOB bus station and board the bus headed back to Amsterdam at 7:30PM. Get back to Amsterdam about 5:45AM the next day.

MONDAY:
-Check in for my flight to Porto & print out the ticket, talk to the people at IES about this mysterious bus that goes from Centraal to the Eindhoven airport.
-Do homework.

WEDNESDAY:
-Head out to Eindhoven and board my plane to Porto that takes off at 1:55PM.
-Arrive in Porto at 2:35PM.
-Catch the soonest train to Lisbon, and with any luck I'll be there by 5-5:30PM.
-HAVE SUPER FUN SEEING ARCADE FIRE ON THURSDAY AND HANGING OUT WITH EVERYONE UNTIL SATURDAY!

SATURDAY:
-Ok I have two options: either stay the rest of the day in Lisbon with everyone OR get on the train back to Porto, spend the day exploring that city, and reserve a room in a really cheap hostel near the airport so I can make it in time for my flight early the next morning. I need to talk to people about this one.

SUNDAY THE 21ST:
-Get to the airport in time for my 9:55AM flight back to Amsterdam.
-Be in Amsterdam at about 1:30PM. Board the train from Eindhoven airport back to Centraal and go home.

THINGS TO DO IN DOWNTIME:
-Convince Emily&others to have Thanksgiving dinner as an Indonesian Rice Tafel dinner or a potluck at Funen.
-Do research for my two final papers, start on rough drafts, do all my homework, visit the Anne Frank house and Rembrant House, and do more souvenir shopping for my family.
-OH GET DINNER AT THAT TIBETAN PLACE and some chinese food while breanna is in prauge ohohoho i am a-cravin'.
-keep up with splenda & make some icons since i have so many damn caps now.


uh
yeah
i think that's it!! awesome!

lmao well today feels like one of those days where no matter how much stuff i get done i just feel unproductive and lazy.

This morning wasn't too bad - i got the best döner chicken sandwich at the market and then did some shopping, did my laundry. Read for my islamic law class, nothing too special.

then this afternoon..... well i guess the reason i feel so fat and dumb is because i put too much value of make believe games like an idiot. lmfao.
( cut, because no one cares. move along.Collapse )

uhm......... nothing else is going on in my life. yep.

let's have a music meme then! (from usernameism):

1. reply to this post and I'll assign you a letter.
2. list (and upload i will if you really want the song) 5 songs you love that begin with that letter.
3. post them to your journal with these instructions.

So she gave me F:

➊ Futures ;; Jimmy Eat World
➋ Fat Lip ;; Sum 41
➌ For Whom the Bell Tolls ;; Metallica
➍ The Funeral Shuffle ;; Hey Young Believer
➎ Fuck You ;; Lily Allen

well today has been
interesting......

First I had to get up at 8am (oh the joy) for class. It was weird and it didn't matter that I didn't do the readings at all (again). The professor made us bring our laptops to... read an article on the new york times website (which we all could've done at home) and to read the first part of the qur'an (which we also could've done at home). However, none of us could get online. Once we figured out the UvAguest shenanigans, only 4 or 5 of us could get it to work properly on our computers. Lol what. The prof had no idea about this, and was like "you guys need to make this work!" Hey. Hey fuck you man. Shit is not that easy. We got out of class early because of it though, so that... almost makes up for it.

Now before leaving for class I saw a bike had fallen onto mine. Great. I pick my bike up from the mess and start biking, but my back wheel got caught on something while I was driving over the brick part of the road. Fantastic! So my wheel got busted up to shit. I had to go replace it about an hour ago and paid 15euro for it too. 15euro! Just fuck me. It squeaks like crazy now too which is so annoying, but at least the wheel is fixed and everything.

After class I finished up my 2-3page pop culture paper, now I just have to fix up the playlist and send it to my prof, who is so fucking weird, by the way. She wants us to have a partner picked out and know what we want to do for our final research paper by 6pm tonight - when we have class. What a great idea! Let's get a bunch of stressed international students and make them flip out right away! Yes! What a perfect plan! Ugh.

At 12:30 though IES pulled our small CORE group which idfk what that means except we have to meet a few times, talk about how we're adapting to being in Amsterdam, and they give us pizza for lunch. I seriously can't remember the last time I gorged myself on pizza like that because goddamn, it wasn't even that good but I was SO HUNGRY. Also I just really wanted pizza. I haven't had it in over a month man I JUST WANTED THAT DELICIOUS GOODNESS INSIDE OF ME

lmlfamsdfoh oh my god i'm so tired/crazy/i dont' even know
i mean it's nothing major just
a lot of tiny things grating on me!

i should nap...... *stares at homework*

Last semester, a professor told me that no place in the world is paradise. You may want to think it is, but it's like a garden - it can be amazing, but you'll still have to pull out the weeds when they grow.

I've found the proverbial 'weeds' in my 'garden' of Amsterdam.

►The RA's are horrible. The common room was locked (which it shouldn't be during the day, ever) and so I knocked on one of our RA's doors. The first thing she said to me?
"I'm not on duty right now."
EXCUSE YOU I DON'T GIVE A FUCK, HELP ME OUT. Your job is to be there for me, not to be a bitch. So I find out the guy whose on duty and go to his door. I knocked three times, he never answers. I go back up about 10 minutes later, knock on his door a few more times. Still no answer.
Uhm, ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME. If you're on duty you should ANSWER THE DOOR. Holy shit. All I wanted was to get the chili powder and some dried herbs from the common room. Why are you doing this to me.

►I cannot find a fucking bike. They're all either not my size, or they cost 200euro. I looked at the market & used products, but they were both Useless. I'm so ready to buy roller skates off Amazon and call it a fucking day.

►My feet hurt :I

Also I'm mad tired from walking around because I walked from the IES building for a book for Dutch Language&Culture (only 40euro instead of 90 yay) and then I went back because I thought I had a meeting but it's actually tomorrow. Oops. Then I went to Waterlooplein to see if they had bikes and hahaha what a joke.

►I'm going to have to take the bus to Centraal (1euro) and then walk to my class (which is 20-30 minutes from there), then do the same thing on the way back. FML. The class is two hours too lfmalmfsdo dear god THIS IS WHY I NEED A BIKE OR ROLLER SKATES
DOING THIS ALL THE TIME WILL KILL ME
OR MAKE ME BROKE
WHICHEVER.

i have nothing to post about except this icon is awesome. all my icons are awesome. I HAVE SO MUCH ICON SPACE I COULD UPLOAD LIKE 55 MORE ICONS BUT IDFK WHAT TO USE IT FOR.

whatever.





also, i had fish tacos for dinner. mm mm mm.

my paid died and now i have a lot of depressing-ish icons. anyway.


I'm so fucking done with being home. I want to move out to Amsterdam so badly. I want to see Bryn Mawr and my friends again too, but that can wait until January. Moving out has to happen now.

I'm so jealous of my friends who are moving back in this week. You guys who don't live away from home don't get this but living away from your parents... it's totally amazing. You can get up when you want, no one nags you about anything, you just do what you decide you have to do. Everyone I know whose going away to college (like my cousins/friends/brother) are all worried like "blah blah blah what if the school work is so hard or so much" or "baaaawwwww i'm not going to make any friends" i'm like dude.
just shut the fuck up and realize the beauty that is you are living on your own.
sure, it's not purely alone - you're on a meal plan and you're paying big bucks and you're required to go to class - but holy shit it's so much better than being stuck in a house, getting nagged at all the time, having make plans to go to friend's houses because they live 10/15 minutes away BECAUSE NOW the kids you know and love are literally yards away, everything is walking distance, and you can relax and not stress out. I WANT THAT BACK
SO
BAD.
hooooly shit i will never be able to move back in with my folks after i graduate seriously lmfao. I don't remember wanting to get out of this damn house so bad at the end of last summer, but this summer i'm so so so done.

I think it's because I'm noticing a lot more tension between my parents than ever before.

At dinner tonight, my mom knocked over a wine glass and the wine spilled everywhere and got on my brother and made this big ol mess. My dad got all pissed and my mom just tried to laugh it off, but that tension just kept up through dinner. My mom had broken a wine glass friday night, so my dad was like "what is wrong with you" lmfao. & At one point my mom started cutting up half of the pizza differently than the first half (we had homemade pizza it was so good) and my dad was like "are you retarded?" and i was just like
...
seriously??
Growing up, yeah my parents argued. But this past year or so I've noticed it's been getting worse. My mom tries to keep laughing things off and cracking jokes, but my dad takes it more seriously and seems to be more on the edge&pissy. I just can't take it. They were never, ever this bad. I don't know if it's because me and my brother aren't around as much anymore and they can be obnoxious or what but it's really fucking strange. I'm legit worried that in a few years their marriage is going to fall apart, unless my dad calms the fuck down and my mom gets a grip.


*breathes* i'm totally ranting but... i just needed to get it out of my system.


IN BETTER NEWS; My uncle raffi&aunt laura were over saturday and we got to hang out with them all day. i love them so much, they're the coolest aunt&uncle anyone could ask for. i want to be like them when i'm older. hopefully with the arcanomicon, the arcade machine my uncle built with a computer inside that has roughly 2000 games on it. awww yeah.

→work has been really hard to concentrate on this past week. I don't care about doing all these fucking CH notebooks, it's a pain in my ass. I feel like nothing worthwhile is getting done. At least when I organize the lab's paperwork it really feels like i'm being productive, not just being shoved into a corner and forced to do bitchwork.

→saw INCEPTION the other day. It was really good, but it wasn't TEH BEST MVIE EVAR!!1 it was though, very powerful and very emotional. also i loved ellen paige&joseph gordon-levitt in it, they were amazing. especially together they were hot

→had to go to the doctor for my check-up today. i absolutely love her, she's really bubbly and cute. NOT NORMALLY HOW I LIKE MY PEOPLE but for a doctor it makes the whole 'i'm naked wrapped in paper!' situation much more comfortable.

→letsplayotokoyo apps open tonight woo!! *slowly writes up galatea app*

→doorshifts is fun so far. i think i'm going to app Vorg there, since i've wanted to play him forever and this is a simple place where i think he'd be fun.

→Naruto this week was absolutely amazing. i just love naruto's parents they're so adorablesdfljk *sobs*

→Bleach is getting more and more ridiculous, but in a good way. Keigo, Tatsuki, and all of them should totally kill Aizen. ichigo can go fuck himself.

→One Piece was great too just for robin & sanji being harassed by iva L M F A O i was dying.

→WOAH NEW TAGS SYSTEM THIS SHIT IS BANANAS

I DON'T CARE IF THEY LOST I'LL USE THIS ICON ANYWAY
I was really unimpressed with spain, they just dicked around and sucked fuck for the whole game except their goal, which was a great play but that whole situation was so lucky.

lmfao god I don't go to the Netherlands for another month and a half and I'm so pissed about them losing. That or it's the quarter of my blood that's Dutch screaming and telling them to punch those spanish guys in the face.

anyway.

MOVING ON TO THIS USELESS MEME

( Music Meme: A song you listen to when you're happy, angry, sadCollapse )

EDIT: Mom mentioned over dinner my great-grandfather used to play for the Holland national team before he moved to the states. MIND. BLOWN.

man idfk what has gotten into me these past few days. i'm rewatching Toy Story for the second time this week, and i'll probably watch Toy Story 2 again tonight too. i've also got this insane hankering to finish Outlaw Star (finally lmfao), rewatch rurouni kenshin, and rewatch/finish yu yu hakusho, i even want to rewatch some sailor moon too, all the old shows i used to watch after school in middle school and stuff. I feel like a fucking child again, all i want to do is sit around and watch TV. it pisses me off that i have to watch everything on the computer sometimes, because it's such a small screen that you can't really set it up anywhere so when curl up on the couch you can see it easily. i want this stuff to be on tv again but i'm too much of a cheap/lazy fuck to buy the dvds lmfao.

huurngng i hate being in this weird almost nostalgic mood??? because i don't want to do anything and i start thinking about old stuff and how i'm getting old with my job and college and all of these unpleasant things. i know i should just be enjoying myself and not thinking about it but lol i'm so bad at that. it doesn't help that i'm spending tonight by myself so i could be doing whatever but i saw everyone yesterday soooo really i shouldn't be complaining.

*turns movie back on* i wish i could watch one of these movies with someone right next to me, that i could talk to face to face. that wasn't my brother or cousin, no offense to them. i wanna have an old fashion sleepover or something really gay like that and watch disney or ghibli films eating popcorn at 12 and seeing who passes out first etc. i like watching movies with my friends online too but it's just not the same. idk. i should just shut the fuck up really!!


.....although rewatching toy story 1 after toy story 3 is really weird cause the CGI looks so messed up LMFAO.