I want uv to tell me whether it thinks it needs an update, before I actually tell it to update.

The most straightforward pattern for this would seem to be supporting --dry-run (which uv lock already supports). uv self update doen't currently support that:

$ uv --version
uv 0.5.7 (3ca155ddd 2024-12-06)
$ uv self update --dry-run
error: unexpected argument '--dry-run' found

  tip: to pass '--dry-run' as a value, use '-- --dry-run'

Usage: uv self update [OPTIONS] [TARGET_VERSION]

For more information, try '--help'.
$ uv --dry-run self update
error: unexpected argument '--dry-run' found

Usage: uv [OPTIONS] <COMMAND>

For more information, try '--help'.
$ 

Possible alternatives:

• uv self list-updates (clunky?)
• uv self update list (ripe for human error)
• uv self update --list (ditto)
• uv self list (better, more like uv python list, may need uv self install too? (and maybe uv python update should be a command as well?))
• uv self versions (different name, same action as uv self list, no real precedent though)