Ficcage!
PLEASE DO NOT READ THIS IF YOU DO NOT LIKE YAOI/GAY/SLASH FICTION. THIS STORY WILL BE POSTED IN UNLOCKED POSTS, JUST IN CASE PEOPLE OTHER THAN THOSE ON MY FLIST HAPPEN UPON IT OVER THE INTARWEBZ AND WISH TO READ IT.
So, I've written another story to do with the german-language film, Love in Thoughts:
Title: Memoirs
Warnings: Gay sex, language, violence
Summary: Nobody knows Guenther Scheller as well as Guenther himself, but even he lets things slip sometimes.
Rating: NC-17, right from the get-go.
Notes: This is fiction based on the German-language film Love in Thoughts. As sad and tragic as it is, it's still a beautifully made film and I will continue to watch it over and over again, despite the heartache. It's mostly Guenther's POV, though there will be changes to third person for some descriptive points. It will be multi-chaptered, though I figure only my girlfriend will be reading it, as I'm fairly positive that nobody else on my Flist even knows what Love in Thoughts is.
I think even Paul noticed my behaviour by the time the second term of our schooling had begun.
Listless and absent from class on a nearly daily basis, I stumbled through school life. He was as cheerful and upbeat as ever, though his own edginess and self-absorbed attitude had started to show through by the time the calendar flipped over to the beautiful month of May.
Labour Day, the first day of May, fell on a Sunday. The schools gave us the following Monday off in lieu of the weekend holiday and Paul watched me from the steps in front of the Mathematics building on the Friday afternoon before the long weekend—jealously, I might add—as I spoke to two of the boys from my physical fitness class. Both were supreme specimens of humanity; hair as light yellow as butter and eyes so clear they might have been from Scandinavia instead of Munich, where I knew their families hailed from. A contrast to my dark hazel eyes and sandy blond hair, though my heritage had never been disputed.
The taller of the two—a boy named Albrecht, whom we lovingly called Al—was a prude who only tolerated me because of his attachment to his best friend; the second boy, Meir.
“Come on, Meir. We've got things to do before we catch the train.”
Meir shrugged the other's hand off as Al tried to take him by the arm.
“I'm staying in Berlin for the weekend. You go on with Lilia and Julie.”
Al looked hurt and he scowled darkly, snatching up his knapsack and tossing it over one shoulder, his jacket already secured to it with the small straps made just for that purpose.
“Fine. Stay here with Guenther. You know you'll never get anywhere with him as long as he's got eyes for Hans.”
The jab went mostly ignored until Albrecht walked away and Meir turned to me, his eyes slightly pained from the other boy's words.
“Meir...”
“Does he mean that, Guenther? Are you just going to use me the way you used Wilhelm during the Christmas break? That story still circulates around the school, you know.”
I knew the rumours still moved throughout the school and it was true at the time; that I had used the beautiful farmer's son, Wilhelm Donner for my own purposes during the Christmas break. He had willingly allowed me to call him Hans, and to pull his hair and shout curses into his ear, as if I were with the drop out I had such a crush upon.
It was common knowledge that Hans was openly bisexual. He flaunted it—as well as the fact that he was only nineteen years old and already had a secure job at the Mokka Efti club—and both boys and girls fantasized about him. They told stories about what they would do with him if they were ever given the chance to bed him, but none wanted it as much as I did.
“Guenther, I'm heading home!” Paul called from the steps, his pack over his shoulder and a hand lifted in a motionless wave. “I'll call you on Monday sometime, so we can meet up before school Tuesday morning!”
I waved back and Paul walked away with an almost dejected look on his face. I knew he loved spending time with me and I had a slight infatuation with him as well—he was a genius when it came to poetry—but Paul was not into the same scene as I was, when it came to the game of love.
“You didn't answer me,” Meir said, his hand falling to claim mine in a rather possessive gesture. “Will I just be a surrogate for your love for Hans?”
“No,” I answered automatically. I wasn't lying, but I wasn't telling the whole truth either. “You know how I feel about you, Meir.”
The gorgeous blond smiled and started to head toward the street, knowing that my parents' apartment was barely a ten minute walk from the school. The man on the sidewalk sweeping the road dust away simply scowled at us, knowing full well that the Scheller adults were in Vienna and would not be back until mid July. I nodded to him and then flipped him the finger as he turned his back, both of my hands groping at Meir's ass as he ascended the two flights of stairs before me.
The door was barely unlocked and we were already against each other, shoving through into the entryway and kicking off our shoes, all flailing limbs and grabby hands. Meir began to unbuckle my belt as I was shrugging out of my jacket and when I felt the coolness of the air against my bare legs, I looked down to him, already on his knees, both of his hands at the waistband of my briefs.
“Meir...” I cooed softly, my hands finding his soft hair, lightly scratching at his scalp as he closed his eyes and murred quietly, like a satisfied kitten. “Here in the entryway or the bedroom?”
He looked up to me, his eyes smiling and almost colourless in their clarity, his hand tugging down my briefs and freeing me from within. I gasped when he slipped his tongue against the head of my cock, my body shivering with anticipation. He kept his eyes open and his head slightly tilted back so I could see him work, the love in his eyes almost enough to make me release right there.
I gently brushed his cheeks when he began to take me into his mouth, forcing myself to refrain from thrusting inside. I loved Meir's oral talents as much as I loved feeling him behind me once we were in bed, and the naughtiness of being given such pleasures right in the front entryway made the experience all the sweeter.
Meir's mouth was wonderfully warm and his teeth scratched along my length just enough to make me hiss through my teeth. I pulled his hair and he only grunted in response, or suckled a bit harder; either gesture arousing me even more. I pulled hard on his hair to make him stop and carefully pulled him away, only to step out of my discarded clothes and leave them on the floor, while I made my way slowly to the master bedroom, my bare ass no doubt a pleasing sight.
“You want me to chase you, Guenther?” Meir called out, undressing as he walked.
I could hear his clothes thumping to the floor and the squeak of feet on the polished wood. It made me smile as I was shrugging out of my undershirt and socks to be completely nude; the realization that while we were only teenagers looking for a good time, neither of us kept our socks on while we fucked. I climbed up onto the bed--after parting the lacy curtains that surrounded it—and kneeled on the soft blankets, pleased that they had been washed last time my parents had been home, so they smelled of lavender and the sweet lye soap my mother so adored.
“I'm coming for you, Guenther!”
I chuckled silently at Meir's choice of words and slipped a hand outside of the curtain, though he could certainly see me through their transparent surface once he turned the corner in the hallway.
“In here!”
I stroked myself as Meir entered, his cock bobbing before him. I stared right at it; the head barely peeking out of the foreskin and his balls hanging low. He was aroused but not so much that they had lifted closer to him. My mouth watered and I slipped down onto all fours, scooting to the edge of the bed and poking my head through the curtain, my mouth open.
“Would you look at this?” he asked playfully, one hand moving his cock into position and carefully sliding it into my waiting mouth. “Guenther! I can't seem to find you, but your parents have this wonderful little creature in their bedroom! It's already waiting on me in the best possible way!”
I smiled around him and swirled my tongue along the underside of his manhood, enjoying the pulse I could feel, beating so strongly. He tasted like youth and vanilla; the sweet taste no doubt coming from the scented soaps the boys used in the showers after fitness class. I think I was lucky that the vanilla flavour—normal as vanilla is—was so distinctly soap-based, that there were no foods tasting the same in the known world. Otherwise, I would weigh hundreds of pounds and be some sort of house-bound shut in!
I could feel the other boy's knees shaking and worried that he might collapse under my ministrations, I let him go and backed onto the bed, quickly followed by Meir's larger form hulking over me. He was panting and I turned my head as he came down upon me, gasping out loud when he nipped at the tender skin below my ear.
“Ahh, Meir!”
He chuckled in my ear and I felt my cock twitch from the depth of it, a vocal range the usually upbeat and childish student avoided. That was, unless he was in bed with a special someone. I liked to think that he only ever sounded like that with me.
I lifted my legs to wrap them around his waist and he moved more quickly than I was expecting, already sliding himself down against my ass and asking for entrance, his cock warm against me. I relaxed and nodded, my eyes open as I wanted to see the look on his face when he slid inside. His mouth was open and his teeth glittered in the lamplight, his forehead and eyes shadowed by the hair that hung over from its normally neatly-groomed state.
He growled—if that's what I could call it!--and buried himself inside completely, tearing me a little bit but the ache felt immensely better than the emptiness I had been feeling. It was easy to enjoy Meir's affections because he was hard and rough like Hans; all groping hands and nipping teeth. If I squinted, the blond hair actually looked a lot like Hans' as well, forcing a loud moan from me when my sexually starved mind suddenly told me that it was the beautiful young Stephan that I was bedding.
Meir upped his pace when he heard the noises I was making and I was into it enough that it didn't even bother me, how much it actually pained me to be taken so hard without any sort of foreplay. I told myself 'remember that this is Meir, not Hans!', so that I wouldn't cry out the wrong name when I finally spilled my seed, but it was easier to simply bite my tongue and chew the inside of my cheek as each thrust stroked me on the inside, while Meir's left hand stroked me on the outside.
He had lifted himself back up into a kneeling position and with my legs parted to either side of him, my crotch was open for business, much to the delight of his warm hand. I thrust weakly into it as he stroked down, eventually ceasing all movement since even the faintest of touches from him had put my nerves on edge. I lifted my arms and touched his chest, belly and sides, scratching the pale skin and panting heavily. The area inside the curtains stunk of sweat and sex, though if I could have found a cologne that smelled the same, I would pay any price to own it.
“Ahhh, Meir. I'm going to come..!”
He gritted his teeth and moved even more quickly, his hand squeezing around me and drawing a raw cry from my throat, as I spilled all over myself, the last few vestiges dribbling down his fingers. Good boy that he was, Meir lifted his hand to his mouth and licked the digits clean, all the while never losing a moment of rhythm before spilling into me with his own well-deserved release.
He growled again, this time more loudly. Fuck the neighbours. They knew we were a loud bunch and my parents had the money to either pay them off or to buy another, better apartment in a less snobby part of the city. No one had a clue that I was homosexual, but two guys growling and groaning together could only really mean one thing: wrestling. Such an important past time of the German youth! We learned wrestling in fitness class and why wouldn't we be practicing, with final challenges coming up in less than a month?
I knew Meir wouldn't stay the weekend, but he did have a very fast bath and gave me a light kiss before heading back to his own home. I ended up with company later that night and right up until Monday night, when my sister Hilde and a few of our friends came to stay. She asked me how I had spent my Friday evening before the rest of them arrived and I told her that I had been with Meir.
She smiled at me, kissed my cheek and went to bed. She left me the master bedroom, more than likely out of disgust on what I had done on the bedspread earlier that night. I slept soundly despite the music coming from the parlour. I dreamed about Meir, though he was named as such and looked like Hans. I woke in a cold sweat and lulled myself to sleep with memories of what we had done earlier that night.
I don't think I loved Meir, but I certainly had feelings for him.
Paul would say otherwise, when I saw him at school Tuesday morning.
So, I've written another story to do with the german-language film, Love in Thoughts:
Title: Memoirs
Warnings: Gay sex, language, violence
Summary: Nobody knows Guenther Scheller as well as Guenther himself, but even he lets things slip sometimes.
Rating: NC-17, right from the get-go.
Notes: This is fiction based on the German-language film Love in Thoughts. As sad and tragic as it is, it's still a beautifully made film and I will continue to watch it over and over again, despite the heartache. It's mostly Guenther's POV, though there will be changes to third person for some descriptive points. It will be multi-chaptered, though I figure only my girlfriend will be reading it, as I'm fairly positive that nobody else on my Flist even knows what Love in Thoughts is.
I think even Paul noticed my behaviour by the time the second term of our schooling had begun.
Listless and absent from class on a nearly daily basis, I stumbled through school life. He was as cheerful and upbeat as ever, though his own edginess and self-absorbed attitude had started to show through by the time the calendar flipped over to the beautiful month of May.
Labour Day, the first day of May, fell on a Sunday. The schools gave us the following Monday off in lieu of the weekend holiday and Paul watched me from the steps in front of the Mathematics building on the Friday afternoon before the long weekend—jealously, I might add—as I spoke to two of the boys from my physical fitness class. Both were supreme specimens of humanity; hair as light yellow as butter and eyes so clear they might have been from Scandinavia instead of Munich, where I knew their families hailed from. A contrast to my dark hazel eyes and sandy blond hair, though my heritage had never been disputed.
The taller of the two—a boy named Albrecht, whom we lovingly called Al—was a prude who only tolerated me because of his attachment to his best friend; the second boy, Meir.
“Come on, Meir. We've got things to do before we catch the train.”
Meir shrugged the other's hand off as Al tried to take him by the arm.
“I'm staying in Berlin for the weekend. You go on with Lilia and Julie.”
Al looked hurt and he scowled darkly, snatching up his knapsack and tossing it over one shoulder, his jacket already secured to it with the small straps made just for that purpose.
“Fine. Stay here with Guenther. You know you'll never get anywhere with him as long as he's got eyes for Hans.”
The jab went mostly ignored until Albrecht walked away and Meir turned to me, his eyes slightly pained from the other boy's words.
“Meir...”
“Does he mean that, Guenther? Are you just going to use me the way you used Wilhelm during the Christmas break? That story still circulates around the school, you know.”
I knew the rumours still moved throughout the school and it was true at the time; that I had used the beautiful farmer's son, Wilhelm Donner for my own purposes during the Christmas break. He had willingly allowed me to call him Hans, and to pull his hair and shout curses into his ear, as if I were with the drop out I had such a crush upon.
It was common knowledge that Hans was openly bisexual. He flaunted it—as well as the fact that he was only nineteen years old and already had a secure job at the Mokka Efti club—and both boys and girls fantasized about him. They told stories about what they would do with him if they were ever given the chance to bed him, but none wanted it as much as I did.
“Guenther, I'm heading home!” Paul called from the steps, his pack over his shoulder and a hand lifted in a motionless wave. “I'll call you on Monday sometime, so we can meet up before school Tuesday morning!”
I waved back and Paul walked away with an almost dejected look on his face. I knew he loved spending time with me and I had a slight infatuation with him as well—he was a genius when it came to poetry—but Paul was not into the same scene as I was, when it came to the game of love.
“You didn't answer me,” Meir said, his hand falling to claim mine in a rather possessive gesture. “Will I just be a surrogate for your love for Hans?”
“No,” I answered automatically. I wasn't lying, but I wasn't telling the whole truth either. “You know how I feel about you, Meir.”
The gorgeous blond smiled and started to head toward the street, knowing that my parents' apartment was barely a ten minute walk from the school. The man on the sidewalk sweeping the road dust away simply scowled at us, knowing full well that the Scheller adults were in Vienna and would not be back until mid July. I nodded to him and then flipped him the finger as he turned his back, both of my hands groping at Meir's ass as he ascended the two flights of stairs before me.
The door was barely unlocked and we were already against each other, shoving through into the entryway and kicking off our shoes, all flailing limbs and grabby hands. Meir began to unbuckle my belt as I was shrugging out of my jacket and when I felt the coolness of the air against my bare legs, I looked down to him, already on his knees, both of his hands at the waistband of my briefs.
“Meir...” I cooed softly, my hands finding his soft hair, lightly scratching at his scalp as he closed his eyes and murred quietly, like a satisfied kitten. “Here in the entryway or the bedroom?”
He looked up to me, his eyes smiling and almost colourless in their clarity, his hand tugging down my briefs and freeing me from within. I gasped when he slipped his tongue against the head of my cock, my body shivering with anticipation. He kept his eyes open and his head slightly tilted back so I could see him work, the love in his eyes almost enough to make me release right there.
I gently brushed his cheeks when he began to take me into his mouth, forcing myself to refrain from thrusting inside. I loved Meir's oral talents as much as I loved feeling him behind me once we were in bed, and the naughtiness of being given such pleasures right in the front entryway made the experience all the sweeter.
Meir's mouth was wonderfully warm and his teeth scratched along my length just enough to make me hiss through my teeth. I pulled his hair and he only grunted in response, or suckled a bit harder; either gesture arousing me even more. I pulled hard on his hair to make him stop and carefully pulled him away, only to step out of my discarded clothes and leave them on the floor, while I made my way slowly to the master bedroom, my bare ass no doubt a pleasing sight.
“You want me to chase you, Guenther?” Meir called out, undressing as he walked.
I could hear his clothes thumping to the floor and the squeak of feet on the polished wood. It made me smile as I was shrugging out of my undershirt and socks to be completely nude; the realization that while we were only teenagers looking for a good time, neither of us kept our socks on while we fucked. I climbed up onto the bed--after parting the lacy curtains that surrounded it—and kneeled on the soft blankets, pleased that they had been washed last time my parents had been home, so they smelled of lavender and the sweet lye soap my mother so adored.
“I'm coming for you, Guenther!”
I chuckled silently at Meir's choice of words and slipped a hand outside of the curtain, though he could certainly see me through their transparent surface once he turned the corner in the hallway.
“In here!”
I stroked myself as Meir entered, his cock bobbing before him. I stared right at it; the head barely peeking out of the foreskin and his balls hanging low. He was aroused but not so much that they had lifted closer to him. My mouth watered and I slipped down onto all fours, scooting to the edge of the bed and poking my head through the curtain, my mouth open.
“Would you look at this?” he asked playfully, one hand moving his cock into position and carefully sliding it into my waiting mouth. “Guenther! I can't seem to find you, but your parents have this wonderful little creature in their bedroom! It's already waiting on me in the best possible way!”
I smiled around him and swirled my tongue along the underside of his manhood, enjoying the pulse I could feel, beating so strongly. He tasted like youth and vanilla; the sweet taste no doubt coming from the scented soaps the boys used in the showers after fitness class. I think I was lucky that the vanilla flavour—normal as vanilla is—was so distinctly soap-based, that there were no foods tasting the same in the known world. Otherwise, I would weigh hundreds of pounds and be some sort of house-bound shut in!
I could feel the other boy's knees shaking and worried that he might collapse under my ministrations, I let him go and backed onto the bed, quickly followed by Meir's larger form hulking over me. He was panting and I turned my head as he came down upon me, gasping out loud when he nipped at the tender skin below my ear.
“Ahh, Meir!”
He chuckled in my ear and I felt my cock twitch from the depth of it, a vocal range the usually upbeat and childish student avoided. That was, unless he was in bed with a special someone. I liked to think that he only ever sounded like that with me.
I lifted my legs to wrap them around his waist and he moved more quickly than I was expecting, already sliding himself down against my ass and asking for entrance, his cock warm against me. I relaxed and nodded, my eyes open as I wanted to see the look on his face when he slid inside. His mouth was open and his teeth glittered in the lamplight, his forehead and eyes shadowed by the hair that hung over from its normally neatly-groomed state.
He growled—if that's what I could call it!--and buried himself inside completely, tearing me a little bit but the ache felt immensely better than the emptiness I had been feeling. It was easy to enjoy Meir's affections because he was hard and rough like Hans; all groping hands and nipping teeth. If I squinted, the blond hair actually looked a lot like Hans' as well, forcing a loud moan from me when my sexually starved mind suddenly told me that it was the beautiful young Stephan that I was bedding.
Meir upped his pace when he heard the noises I was making and I was into it enough that it didn't even bother me, how much it actually pained me to be taken so hard without any sort of foreplay. I told myself 'remember that this is Meir, not Hans!', so that I wouldn't cry out the wrong name when I finally spilled my seed, but it was easier to simply bite my tongue and chew the inside of my cheek as each thrust stroked me on the inside, while Meir's left hand stroked me on the outside.
He had lifted himself back up into a kneeling position and with my legs parted to either side of him, my crotch was open for business, much to the delight of his warm hand. I thrust weakly into it as he stroked down, eventually ceasing all movement since even the faintest of touches from him had put my nerves on edge. I lifted my arms and touched his chest, belly and sides, scratching the pale skin and panting heavily. The area inside the curtains stunk of sweat and sex, though if I could have found a cologne that smelled the same, I would pay any price to own it.
“Ahhh, Meir. I'm going to come..!”
He gritted his teeth and moved even more quickly, his hand squeezing around me and drawing a raw cry from my throat, as I spilled all over myself, the last few vestiges dribbling down his fingers. Good boy that he was, Meir lifted his hand to his mouth and licked the digits clean, all the while never losing a moment of rhythm before spilling into me with his own well-deserved release.
He growled again, this time more loudly. Fuck the neighbours. They knew we were a loud bunch and my parents had the money to either pay them off or to buy another, better apartment in a less snobby part of the city. No one had a clue that I was homosexual, but two guys growling and groaning together could only really mean one thing: wrestling. Such an important past time of the German youth! We learned wrestling in fitness class and why wouldn't we be practicing, with final challenges coming up in less than a month?
I knew Meir wouldn't stay the weekend, but he did have a very fast bath and gave me a light kiss before heading back to his own home. I ended up with company later that night and right up until Monday night, when my sister Hilde and a few of our friends came to stay. She asked me how I had spent my Friday evening before the rest of them arrived and I told her that I had been with Meir.
She smiled at me, kissed my cheek and went to bed. She left me the master bedroom, more than likely out of disgust on what I had done on the bedspread earlier that night. I slept soundly despite the music coming from the parlour. I dreamed about Meir, though he was named as such and looked like Hans. I woke in a cold sweat and lulled myself to sleep with memories of what we had done earlier that night.
I don't think I loved Meir, but I certainly had feelings for him.
Paul would say otherwise, when I saw him at school Tuesday morning.