Omg you guys.  Fuck this day.  Just FUCK THIS DAY. I just should not have come into work today.

 

And now I'm going to go throw up.

Posted via LiveJournal app for Android.

And party!weekend officially clocks in at 13,363 words. *falls over*

Fic word count: 35,779
Total words + scenes: 43,518

So this thing is going to easily surpass 50K.

The internet is down again and I have been at the coffee shop writing since 9 a.m. Laundry? Groceries? What are these things you speak of?

It's taken me nearly 7 hours to write about a thousand words. Angst angst angst. But this fucking weekend is over and the next one (which parts are already written thank GOD) is going to be just as angst ridden though I'm thinking this is the weekend where it comes to a head and Things Get Resolved. Or at least talked about in some capacity. Chatty chatty chatty.

These chairs are so not made for sitting for extended periods of time. But omg it is done.

Three more weekends to go. Can I write 40,000 more words before September 20th? *facepalm*

I've seen a few people talking about HP and the last movie and their own manifestos so, um, here's mine?

( cut for lengthCollapse )

...this was not what I was planning on posting today. I should go clean my apartment.

I am no longer a shopgirl at The Shop.

It is the end of an era, really. I worked there for 4 and a half years.

Yesterday, while at my favorite coffee shop abusing the free internet of the store two doors down, I ran into the woman who runs the new dry cleaning store (I say "new" because she's only been open for 2 years) who I've talked to a few times and is one of those refreshingly honest people and we've always gotten along pretty well. I had heard rumors that she was hiring so I asked and she said she was so after I'd finished my lunch and I toddled on down to fill out an App. As I'm filling out this standard Hiring App she asks when I want to start and I shrugged and said, "Right now?" Her eyes got all wide and she said, "Seriously?" To which I replied, "Seriously." So I worked from 1:30-7:30 and afterward she was full of praise and after my 60 hours of training, I'm pretty confident she will keep me on at least 20 or so hours a week. \o/ So this combined with working at the other gift shop on Saturdays, I might be okay. Once school ends I'll know my time better and I might keep on looking for a third, office job just to keep me busy.

But yay! I am so very very pleased that these jobs I have found have all been attained based on the fact that people know me and Like Me.

I was talking (squealing) on the phone with my sister last night (did I mention that I had only gotten 2 and a half hours of sleep Sunday night so I'd quite literally worked 12 hours yesterday on little sleep AND NO CAFFEINE?) and I realized how beaten down Old Boss made me feel. I was an awesome employee. The two new bosses think I am fantastic and as a result, I want to work my ass off for them and show them that their faith is not misplaced. I am so effing happy right now, you have no idea.

So once again sitting in my favorite coffee shop, drinking my coffee, grinning stupidly over these new Alex O'Loughlin photos that are floating around and (attempting) to do my Psych homework (because it involves an internet connection and I have no internet at home again argh -- however, if my internet *was* working, I never would've come down here yesterday, never would've run into S and wouldn't have found this awesome new potential job. YAY!)

I feel lighter than I have in a really, really long time, dear flist. :)

I am feeling almost better today. This is significant because I've, almost literally, spent the last week in bed. This means I haven't been to class since last Thursday. Yeah. Not my finest hour AT ALL. But I will make it to class tomorrow because it's a lab and I will make it to class on Friday and the rest of this semester because GOD DAMNIT I WILL GET THROUGH THIS. Because at the end of this semester?

I am quitting my job.

You heard right. I've been talking about it sort of half-assed for the last two years, but it is time. Mostly because the shop is going under FAST. Our average customer count these days is between 5 and 8. Which means we're making about $40 a day. Yeeah. So, at the end of this semester (if not sooner) I will be quitting my job and going to Kelly Services to become a Temp.

Depending on finances and how much financial aid I have left, I will be taking 3 summer classes and then three classes this fall and then graduating. The tentative plan is to move to NYC either before or after Christmas depending on how quickly an apartment and a job can be found. There is also the idea floating around of applying to schools in NYC now and seeing about transferring. It is all very scary and exhilarating. But I have no ties here and I like NYC and I want to be closer to my sister. I want to be able to get on the N or the 7 train and ride 20 minutes to see her instead of the 6 hours it is now. There are good schools in NYC, too, and I need to get my shit together by September because in September Thing 2 enters pre-pre-k (I KNOW, RIGHT?) and the current finances the sister is supplying me with will (COMPLETELY UNDERSTANDABLY) be relegated to Thing 2's education.

It feels like things are (tentatively) slotting into place which is sort of nice and I need a change of scenery. I will, of course, be devastated to leave my lovely, little apartment of 1 and what will probably happen is I will get to NYC and live with the sister and brother-in-law for about a month while I save up money and find a place to live and establish some temp jobs. They have already offered to pay moving expenses and boarding of the cats if need be (and if I'm living with them, I will have to because the cats and small children DO NOT MIX -- and we all know that me giving up the cats is NOT AN OPTION).

I'm feeling brave about this. A week ago, hell just yesterday, I will still feeling scared and freaked out of my mind, but now I feel sort of serene about it. I am not quite at the stage where I'm ready for my sister to start using her network in NYC on my behalf but I think if this feeling remains in another week or so I will let her run rampant.

I am giving up the hope that I will get into Bryn Mawr and one-up my mother. She is an insignificance that I need to let go. Because I'm sick of being angry and I'm sick of being depressed about her and about how I should feel. I want her to disappear in a cloud of white smoke and if that means no longer opening my grandmother's letters than so be it. Because I'm sick of spending a week in bed and jeopardizing my academic career. They will not win. The chemicals will not win. I will be brave and I will be glorious.

Because I'm supergirl, God dammit.

The semester is officially over for me.

I have no idea what to do with myself. I keep saying, "I'm done." and laughing hysterically.

Feel a little like I might throw up.

I'm so glad it's over.