Trailer Parks of the Uncanny Highway

10 Friday Jun 2022

Posted by Daniel James Hanley in GROOVY Ghastly Affair, Historical Gaming, Random Tables, Uncanny Highway, Weird

Tags

1960s, 1970s, Americana, GROOVY Ghastly Affair, Groovy Horror, Groovy Seventies, Midwest Horror, Prairie Horror, psychotronic, Road Crawl, Road Trip, Rural America, Swinging Sixties, Weird America

The latest post in the Uncanny Highway series details the Trailer Parks of U.S. Route 28.

Table 1: Reason to Stop at a Trailer Park

d4	Your attention is attracted by the…
1	sign on the highway advertising a concert.
2	sign on the highway advertising a “no questions asked” pawn broker.
3	sign on the highway advertising “The best barbecue in the state”.
4	sign on the highway advertising Psychic readings.

Table 2: Trailer Park Name

d20, d20	This Trailer Park is named…
1	Shady	Acres
2	Green	Woods
3	Sunny	Forest
4	Verdant	Fields
5	Pleasant	Hill
6	Restful	Creek
7	Happy	Lawn
8	Rainbow	Garden
9	God’s Good	Shelter
10	Rich	Castle
11	Jackpot	Homes
12	Jack & Jill(‘s)	Mount
13	Christian	Court
14	Cozy	Lane
15	Stag	Park
16	Roadside	Square
17	Highway	Hitch
18	Indian	Stop
19	Pretty	Rest
20	Welcome	Promise

Table 3: Size of the Park

d8	The number of homes in the park is…
1	6+d6
2 – 3	12+d8
4 – 5	20+d10
6	30+d12
7	40+d20
8	50+d100

Table 4: Trailer Park Enclosure

d12	The Trailer Park is enclosed by…
1 – 3	nothing.
4 – 6	speed bumps.
7 – 8	a chain link fence.
9	a chain link fence topped with barbed wire.
10	a white picket fence.
11	a split-rail fence.
12	a brick wall.

Table 5: Trailer Park Amenities

d20, 1d6 times.	Residents enjoy…
1	no amenities – it is literally just a lot to park in. Stop rolling if this is the first result. Re-roll if you’ve already determined other Amenities.
2 – 6	full water, electrical, and sewage hookups.
7	transport by mini-bus for residents
8	a swimming pool. Will be next to the Clubhouse, if one is present.
9	a softball diamond
10	playground equipment
11	a concert stage.
12	an ice machine.
13	a soda vending machine.
14	a candy and potato chip vending machine.
15	a communal fire pit.
16	benches.
17	grills.
18	a Clubhouse for residents. Any Community Activities will be in or near the Clubhouse.
19	bathroom and toilet facilities. For the use of residents living out of travel trailers, teardrop trailer, or camper vans.
20	a basketball court.

Table 6: Trailer And Mobile Home Types

d20	The home occupying this lot is a…
1	parked car and small travel trailer.
2	parked car and small teardrop trailer.
3	parked camper van.
4	parked cab-over motorhome.
5	single-wide streamlined stainless steel trailer with visible wheels.
6	single-wide streamlined stainless steel trailer without visible wheels.
7	single-wide flat-roofed trailer, with painted aluminum sides, and visible wheels.
8	single-wide flat-roofed trailer, with painted aluminum sides, and no visible wheels.
9	single-wide peak-roofed trailer, with painted aluminum sides, and visible wheels.
10	single-wide peak-roofed trailer, with painted aluminum sides, and no visible wheels.
11	converted yellow school bus.
12	converted tour bus.
13	double-wide streamlined stainless steel trailer with visible wheels
14	double-wide streamlined stainless steel trailer without visible wheels
15	double-wide flat-roofed trailer, with painted aluminum sides, and visible wheels.
16	double-wide flat-roofed trailer, with painted aluminum sides and no visible wheels.
17	double-wide peak-roofed trailer, with painted aluminum sides, and visible wheels.
18	double-wide peak-roofed trailer, with painted aluminum sides, and no visible wheels.
19	flat-roofed, prefabricated ranch house.
20	peak-roofed, prefabricated ranch house.

Table 7: Items Outside a Trailer Park Home

d100, 1d6 times	Outside this home is / are…
1 – 20	a parked car.
21 – 25	a motorcycle.
26 – 29	a bicycle.
30 – 31	a moped.
32 – 35	a mailbox.
36 – 37	an exterior TV antenna.
38 – 40	a trash can.
41 – 42	an exterior propane tank.
43 – 44	a lattice or picket fence.
45 – 46	a clothesline.
47 – 48	a sawhorse.
49 – 50	a barbecue smoker.
51 – 52	a portable grill
53 – 54	a pink flamingo figure
55 – 56	1d4 artificial sunflowers
57 – 58	1d4 pieces of 2 x 4 lumber.
59 – 60	wind chimes.
61 – 62	a doll.
63 – 64	a hobby horse.
65 – 66	a garden gnome
67 – 68	a children’s lemonade stand. Even if there are no children to staff it!
69 – 70	a plastic lawn chair.
71 – 72	a plastic table.
73 – 74	1d4 plants in plastic tubs.
75 – 76	a kiddie pool. The kind you fill with a garden hose. During the summer it is 25% likely an adult is sitting in it.
77 – 78	1d6 rusting car parts.
79 – 80	a cinder block.
82 – 83	a car up on cinder blocks.
84 – 85	a couch.
90 – 91	an ice cooler.
92 – 93	a doghouse. 75% likely to house a dog.
94 – 95	a metal drum.
96 – 97	a plastic bucket.
98 – 99	a concrete birdbath.
100	a store mannequin.

Table 8: The Trailer Park Manager

d12	The Manager is apparently…
1	a greasy sleazeball…
2	a religious fanatic…
3	a competent jack-of-all-trades…
4	an aggressive ex-Marine…
5	a shady ex-con…
6	a failed musician who is usually playing their guitar…
7	a man who screams everything he says
8	an ex-cop who is appears suspicious of everyone…
9	a mature and motherly woman…
10	an incorrigible gossip…
11	an elderly man who is usually asleep…
12	an elderly woman who feigns deafness…

d20	…who is actually…
1 – 9	just what they appear to be.
10	a C.I.A. agent.
11	a K.G.B agent.
12	an undercover cop investigating a criminal ring.
13	a Demon Hunter on the lookout for Evil.
14	an android.
15	the servant of a Vampire.
16	a Psychic or Miracle Worker.
17	a Satanic cultist.
18	a Werewolf.
19	an Extraterrestrial.
20	one of the Fairy Folk.

Table 9: Notable Trailer Park Residents

d20, 1d6 times.	Everyone in the Park knows…
1	the Right-Wing conspiracy theorist who talks incessantly about “The Commies in Hollywood”, and “The Pinkos in New York”.
2	the Left-Wing conspiracy theorist who talks incessantly about “The Man”, and “The Military-Industrial Complex”.
3	the aging beauty queen who propositions every young man.
4	the Vietnam vet who collects weapons. Lots of weapons.
5	the handsome but slightly sleazy Trailer Park Gigolo.
6	the U.F.O enthusiast, with the inside of his trailer papered with photos and magazine articles.
7	the cross-dressing ex-boxer.
8	the woman Truck Driver who can beat any man at arm-wrestling.
9	the Barbecue Master, who eats, breathes, and lives slow-cooked meat.
10	the sly Pawn Broker who runs his business of of his trailer – and may be a fence for stolen goods.
11	the teenage Rock n’ Roller with big dreams of stardom.
12	the down-on-his-luck author who has been everywhere – but wound up here.
13	the popular and pretty cheerleader, who everyone at school thinks lives in a big suburban house.
14	the bighearted stripper who always helps out the less-fortunate residents.
15	the melodramatic Psychic reader who fakes an Eastern European accent – but may actually have real powers.
16	Big Momma, to whom everyone listens – if they know what’s good for them!
17	the Mean Old Man who has been here forever.
18	the woman with all the cats.
19	the religious fanatic who is constantly handing out tracts, and telling everyone that Jesus is returning soon.
20	that nice young man who always keeps to himself and doesn’t bother anyone – except sometimes there’s a rotten smell coming from his trailer.

Repeated results mean there are several individuals of that type in the Park!

Table 10: Average Residents of a Trailer Park

d10	This trailer is inhabited by…
1	a single man.
2	a single woman.
3	two men. 50% chance to actually be a Gay couple.
4	two women. 50% chance to actually be a Lesbian couple.
5	a married man and woman, with no children.
6	an unmarried man and woman, with no children.
7	a married man and woman, with d4 children.
8	an unmarried man and woman, with d4 children.
9	a single mother with d4 children.
10	a single father with d4 children.

Table 11: Community Activities in a Trailer Park

d10	Tonight, there is…
1 – 10	no event.
11 – 12	Bingo.
13	Movie Night. Movie is a poor-quality print, which may or may not be projected onto an actual screen. Determine the title of the movie with the tables for Drive-In Theaters.
14 – 15	poker.
16	softball.
17	a Chinese Auction.
18	a bonfire.
19	a concert.
20	a swim party. If there is no permanent swimming pool, everyone just hangs out around one or more kiddie pools.

Table 12: Criminal Activity in a Trailer Park

d10	This Trailer Park is used for…
1 – 3	no criminal activity, because the honest residents put a stop to it!
4	making methamphetamine.
5	smuggling.
6	drug dealing.
7	prostitution. Either prostitutes who work the nearest Truck Stop (or Motel) live here (with their Pimp if they have one), or there is a prostitution ring actually operating out of the Trailer Park.
8	stashing stolen goods.
9	fencing stolen goods.
10	counterfeiting money. One of the larger homes has a printing press inside.

Table 13: Dark Secret of the Trailer Park

d12	The shocking fact about the Trailer Park is…
1	it’s built directly atop a network of caverns inhabited by degenerate cannibals.
2	one of the residents is a serial killer.
3	it’s built atop an “Indian” Burial Ground!
4	the site is former cemetery – only the headstones were moved.
5	it’s part of a C.I.A. mind control experiment.
6	it’s built atop a toxic waste dump, which is turning residents into cannibalistic Zombies.
7	it’s home to a werewolf pack.
8	it’s haunted by the ghost of murdered former resident.
9	it’s the lair of a Vampire.
10	the residents are frequently abducted by Extraterrestrials.
11	its Mob-owned
12	it’s completely illegal – the owner doesn’t have any necessary licenses, and doesn’t pay any taxes.

Table 14: Overnight Events in a Trailer Park

d20	Tonight…
1	a U.F.O descends above one of the homes, and abducts a resident with a beam of light.
2	Jesus comes to visit in disguise.
3	Government Agents come to take away a little girl who is already a powerful and dangerous Psychic.
4	a propane tank explodes!
5	a sinkhole open up to the caverns below.
6	a bear, or other large animal, wanders into the Park.
7	there is a gunfight between two residents.
8	an Outlaw Biker gangs rolls in, demanding that the residents give up someone who vandalized one of the gang’s bikes at a nearby bar or truck stop.
9	a violent domestic dispute spills out into the common area.
10	a U.F.O. appears overhead, but does not land.
11	the windows of a home suddenly, and inexplicably, shatter.
12	the residents of a trailer unexpectedly vacate it.
13	a cop is seen inspecting several of the homes.
14	The Manager is seen dancing in an empty lot, to music only they can hear.
15	a meteorite crashes into one of the homes.
16	a mysterious baby with no belly button suddenly appears in one of the empty lots.
17	1d4 teenagers start knocking on doors, screaming that they are being chased by a psycho killer.
18	there are strange colored lights and an odd buzzing noise coming from one of the homes.
19	a resident teenager is loudly playing the guitar (or drums).
20	Poltergeist phenomena begins in one of the homes.

Motels of the Uncanny Highway

05 Thursday Aug 2021

Posted by Daniel James Hanley in Gothic Gaming, GROOVY Ghastly Affair, Historical Gaming, Random Tables, Uncanny Highway, Weird

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

20th Century, American Horror, Americana, Ghastly Affair, Gothic Gaming, Gothic Horror, GROOVY Ghastly Affair, Groovy Horror, Middle America, Midwest Horror, Prairie Horror, Road Trip, Rural America, Seventies, Sixties

For many lost on the Uncanny Highway of U.S. Route 28, the motel is as close as they may ever come to a home again. They stay for a night – or maybe just an hour. Most believe they are going somewhere else. Others know that once the road claims you as its own, it never lets you go.

Motel Architecture

d20	The architectural style of the motel is…
1	faux Aztec or Native American.
2	faux “Tudor”.
3	faux medieval castle.
4 – 5	Space-Age Googie.
6	Southwestern / Adobe
7	faux Polynesian (“Tiki”).
8	log cabin.
9 – 12	nondescript brick.
13 – 16	nondescript concrete & stucco.
17 – 20	nondescript clapboard.

Motel Layout

d20	The basic layout of the motel is…
1 – 3	a long rectangle on a single level. The parking lot in in front.
4 – 6	a long rectangle on two levels. The parking lot in in front.
7	a long rectangle on three levels. The parking lot in in front.
8	an “L” surrounding the parking lot, on a single level.
9	an “L” surrounding the parking lot, on two levels.
10	an “L” surrounding the parking lot, on three levels.
11	an “L” surrounding the rear courtyard, on a single level. The parking lot in in front.
12	an “L” surrounding the rear courtyard, on two levels. The parking lot in in front.
13	an “L” surrounding the rear courtyard, on three levels. The parking lot in in front.
14	A “U” surrounding the parking lot, on a single level.
15	A “U” surrounding the parking lot, on two levels.
16	A “U” surrounding the parking lot, on three levels.
17	A “U” surrounding the rear courtyard, on a single level. The parking lot is in front.
18	A “U” surrounding the rear courtyard, on two levels. The parking lot is in front.
19	A “U” surrounding the rear courtyard, on three levels. The parking lot is in front.
20	several single units separated from each other. The office is a stand-alone building.

Motel Size

d10	The size of the motel is…
1 – 2	5 rooms per level.
3 – 5	10 rooms per level
6 – 7	15 rooms per level
8	20 rooms per level
9	25 rooms per level
10	30 rooms per level.

Motel Vacancy

d20	The rooms are…
1	Completely vacant.
2	10% occupied
2 – 4	20% occupied
5 – 6	30% occupied
7 – 8	40% occupied
9 – 17	50% occupied
18	60% occupied
17	70% occupied
18	80% occupied
19	90% occupied
20	100% occupied – no vacancy.

Front Desk Clerk

d6	The front desk clerk is…
1	a young woman… (50% likely to be the daughter of the owner.)
2	a young man… (50% likely to be the son of the owner.)
3	a mature woman… (50% likely to be the owner.)
4	a mature man… (50% likely to be the owner.)
5	an older woman… (75% likely to be the owner.)
6	an older man… (75% likely to be the owner.)

d20	who is notably…
1	nosy.
2	bored.
3	distracted.
4	flirty.
5	dim-witted.
6	hot-tempered.
7	cheerful.
8	unhelpful.
9	buxom / muscular.
10	pretty / handsome.
11	sleezy.
12	fidgety / twitchy.
13	of a foreign ethnicity.
14	thin.
15	corpulent.
16	ill.
17	bigoted.
18	tolerant and agreeable.
19	dirty and unkempt.
20	clean and neat.

Motel Room Cost

d12.	The price of a room is…
1	incredibly cheap. (How are they making any money?)
2	incredibly cheap. Plus, there are both hourly and half-hourly rates.
3	very reasonable.
4	very reasonable, and there are hourly rates.
5 – 6	average.
7 – 8	average, and there are hourly rates.
9	a little above average.
10	a little above average, but there are hourly rates.
11	expensive.
12	expensive, but there are hourly rates.

Motel Amenities

d12, 1d6 times	The amenities include…
1	a pool
2	an ice Machine or chest
3	a guest lounge
4	free coffee & tea
5	free donuts
6	1d4 vending machines
7	free newspapers
8	a rack of magazines for sale
9	local travel brochures
10	laundry facilities
11	gas pumps.
12	“efficiency” rooms with kitchen facilities.

Motel Room Decor

d20, twice	Beyond the bed, your room has…
1	a coin-operated “magic fingers” machine. (Insert a quarter into the timing device bedside the bed, and the bed will vibrate for 15 minutes.)
2	a desk.
3 – 4	a chair.
5	a closet.
6	an ironing board.
7	a television.
8 – 10	a radio.
11 – 12	a telephone.
13	1d4 kitschy paintings. (Overly-vibrant landscapes, sad-eyed clowns, Western scenes, Elvis, Jesus, etc. Some or all of them might be on black velvet.)
14	1d4 sculptures
15 – 18	it’s own bathroom, with a tub.
19	a shower.
20	a small selection of books (besides the Bible).

Notable Feature of a Motel Room

d20	The most notable thing about the room is…
1	it looks as though it is seldom cleaned.
2	it is so clean it looks as though it is never used.
3	the groovy shag carpeting.
4	the stucco walls, with many sharp points.
5	the pine veneer paneling.
6	it is decorated in an exotic style completely incongruous to the exterior of the building.
7	the potted plants on the windowsill.
8	the psychedelic wallpaper.
9	the sliding glass door to the outside.
10	the mirror above the bed.
11	the smell – caused by a dead hooker inside the hollowed-out mattress.
12	the colored light bulbs
13	the odd color of the walls
14	the incongruous style of the furniture.
15	the obvious signs of vermin.
16	the odd humming sound that comes from no obvious source.
17	the constant sound of whispering.
18	a single article of clothing left on a chair, in a drawer, or in in a closet. If the clothing is moved or discarded, it will reappear in its original position the next morning.
19	the mold.
20	the walls seem so thing you can hear everything happening in the next room.

Motel Room Bible

d12	The Bible in this room is…
1 – 3	unremarkable.
4	actually another book, disguised as a Bible.
5	filled with dollar bills.
6	bloodstained.
7	annotated, with many comments and underlined passages.
8	bound in a strange, unidentifiable leather.
9	oddly expensive looking.
10	cheaply printed on newsprint paper.
11	filled with photographs of unknown people.
12	bookmarked with playing cards.

Motel Vending Machines

d20, 3d4 times	The vending machines dispense…
1	cola.
2	ginger-ale.
3	iced-tea.
4	coffee.
5	hot tea.
6	potato chips.
7	pretzels.
8	peanuts.
9	chocolate bars
10	candies (other than chocolate).
11	deodorant
12	toothpaste
13	soap.
14	aspirin.
15	antihistamines.
16	adhesive bandages.
17	shaving razors.
18	feminine hygiene products.
19	knives.
20	shoelaces.

Multiples of the same result indicate multiple brands or varieties are available.

Motel Guests

d100	Current guests include…
1 – 5	an average American family (Husband, Wife, +1d4 children).
6 – 9	a single mother with 1d4 children.
10 – 13	a single man, traveling to a new job.
14 – 16	a single woman, traveling to a new job.
17 – 20	a trucker.
21 – 24	a trucker couple.
25 – 27	a biker.
28 – 30	a biker couple.
31 – 32	prostitute with a client.
33 – 35	traveling salesman.
36 – 38	housewife who has left her husband.
39 – 41	husband thrown out of his house by his wife.
42 – 44	a road worker.
45 – 47	a lineworker (person who maintains phone and electrical lines).
48 – 50	a family of migrant workers.
51 -53	a runaway girl.
54 – 56	a runaway boy.
57 – 59	a pimp.
60 – 62	a drug addict/alcoholic on a binge.
63 – 65	an undercover cop.
66 – 68	a carnival worker.
69 – 71	a preacher, priest, or other clergyperson.
72 – 74	a photographer seeking to document America.
75 – 76	a journalist on assignment.
77 – 78	a scientist (d6. 1=archeologist, 2=geologist, 3=biologist, 4=botanist, 5=astronomer, 6=meteorologist,)
79 – 80	a film crew making pornographic movies.
81 – 82	a drug dealer.
83 – 84	a gay or lesbian couple, trying not to be recognized.
85 – 86	a “transvestite” (cross-dresser).
87 – 88	police performing surveillance.
89 – 90	a federal agent on assignment.
91 – 92	an escapee from prison.
93 – 94	a thief on the run.
95 – 96	a couple on a crime spree.
97 – 98	a serial killer.
99	1d4 clown(s). In makeup.
100	an extraterrestrial or supernatural being.

TV Stations

d12	This station is playing…
1	a horror movie.
2	a movie about World War II.
3	a romance movie.
4	a mystery movie.
5	a historical movie (other than World War II).
6	a sitcom.
7	a dramatic series.
8	a game show.
9	a variety show.
10	a concert special.
11	a regular news show.
12	a breaking news bulletin (roll again to determine the interrupted show)

There will be 1d4+1 stations available.

American TV stations have 4-letter designations. Those west of the Mississippi River have the initial letter “K”, while those east of it begin with a “W”

Motel Events

d20	During the course of your stay…
1	the police raid one of the rooms.
2	a woman runs out of a room (50% each to be Naked, Screaming, Bloody, Insane, and/or Violent.)
3	a room explodes from the inside.
4	a strange colored vapor begins emanating from a room.
5	animalistic howls and growls can be heard coming from a room.
6	the windows of a room shatter for no apparent reason.
7	someone drowns in the pool, falls from a balcony, or is run down by a car in the parking lot.
8	a sinkhole opens up under the pool (if present) or parking lot. (d6. Underneath is…[1] a secret Government facility, [2] forgotten catacombs, [3] a forgotten section of storm sewer, [4] a UFO base, [5] a sleeping monster, [6] a subterranean city.)
9	a pack of wild dogs enters the motel grounds.
10	a biker gang enters the motel grounds and goes on a rampage.
11	a shootout starts in the motel parking lot.
12	dead birds start falling from the sky.
13	a man begins knocking on every door frantically, claiming that his wife has disappeared.
14	you are awakened by a supernatural entity in your room. (d6. 1=Ghost, 2=Incubus/Succubus, 3=Vampyre, 4=Fairy, 5=Angel, 6=Extraterrestrial(s))
15	a UFO appears overhead.
16	you receive a phone call from a dead relative.
17	the walls of your room begin bleeding.
18	an inexplicable banging sound is heard throughout the motel.
19	a private detective knocks on the door, looking for information about a missing person.
20	there is a knock on the door, but there is nobody on the other side.

Motel Secrets

d20	The most unsettling fact about this motel is…
1	it is the center of the local drug trade.
2	it is the center of the local prostitution trade.
3	the owner has installed peep-holes in every room.
4	it its just a money-laundering operation for the local mob.
5	it is the hunting ground of a serial killer.
6	guests are secretly filmed, an the movies sold as pornography.
7	guests become the subject of a CIA mind-control experiment.
8	illegal bare-knuckle fights occur there.
9	some guest are killed, and ground up as meat.
10	it was built directly atop an “Indian” (Native American) burial ground.
11	the local Vampyre uses it as their primary feeding ground.
12	a kidnapped person is being held for ransom in one of the rooms. (d6. Person is… [1] a mature man. [2] a mature man. [3] a teenage boy. [4] a teenage girl. [5] a young boy. [6] a young girl.)
13	the owner is an extraterrestrial.
14	the previous owner murdered his entire family with an axe.
15	one or more of the rooms is actually used to grow marijuana hydroponically.
16	one of the rooms is actually a fully appointed Satanic temple.
17	local people often check in to commit suicide here.
18	there is one room that is never rented, and the clerk refuses to say why.
19	it was once the site of a mass-murder. (75% likely the victims’ ghosts still haunt the motel)
20	every other curent guest besides the PCs is actually a supernatural entity of some kind.

Truck Stops of the Uncanny Highway

21 Wednesday Apr 2021

Posted by Daniel James Hanley in Gothic Gaming, GROOVY Ghastly Affair, Historical Gaming, Random Tables, Uncanny Highway, Weird

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Heaven and Hell meet in the truck stops of the Uncanny Highway – sometimes, literally. During the “Groovy Age” of the 1960s and 1970s, American truck stops were generally smaller – and more numerous – than the massive ones to be found on highways today. The road-weary trucker could pull in to get gas, have their rig weighed, get repairs done, have a meal, take a shower, rest in the lounge room, rent a bed, do laundry, clean their truck, buy supplies – and possibly indulge their vices.

“Groovy Age” truck stops constituted a demimonde largely hidden from the eyes of non-truckers, and the following tables can set up some extremely dark and gritty scenarios. Naturally, you should edit the results to reflect the comfort level of your group.

Truck Stop Theme

d20	The overall design of the main building is…
1	Tiki.
2	Space-Age “Googie”.
3	Old West Boomtown.
4	faux adobe.
5	a rustic log cabin.
6	Art Deco chrome.
7	a faux castle.
8	faux Chinese.
9 – 10	plain brick, and in good repair.
11 – 12	plain brick, and in a state of disrepair.
13 – 14	plain clapboard, and in good repair.
15 – 16	plain clapboard, and in a state of disrepair.
17 – 18	stucco-faced brick, and in good repair.
19 – 20	stucco-faced brick, and in a state of disrepair.

The Parking Lot

d20	The parking lot is built for…
1 – 2	10 rigs
3 – 4	15 rigs
5 – 6	20 rigs
7 – 8	25 rigs
9 – 10	30 rigs
11 – 12	35 rigs
13	40 rigs
14	50 rigs
15	55 rigs
16	60 rigs
17	65 rigs
18	70 rigs
19	75 rigs
20	80 rigs

d12	and is currently occupied..
1	10%
2	20%
3	30%
4	40%
5 – 8	50%
9	60%
10	70%
11	80%
12	90%

d20	Besides trucks, the other cars in the lot include…
1 – 2	a motorcycle.
3	a “chopper” motorcycle.
4	a highway patrol car.
5	a highway patrol motorcycle.
6	a decorated “Hippie Van”.
7	a rock band’s Tour Bus.
8	a 2-door coupe.
9	a Camper Van or Motorhome
10	an El Camino.
12	a plain white van with blacked-out windows.
13	a family station wagon.
14	a plain four-door sedan.
15	a 1950s model Cadillac Eldorado – with big rear fins.
16	a sporty convertible.
17	a muscle car.
18	a Volkswagen Beetle.
19	a European sportscar.
20	a pickup truck.

There is a 50% chance per hour spent (sleeping or idling) in the Parking Lot that a “Lot Lizard” (prostitute) will knock on the car (or truck) door.

Truck Cargoes

d100	This rig is hauling…
1 – 2	Auto Parts.
3 – 4	Beef.
5 – 6	Beer.
7 – 8	Bicycles.
9 – 10	Birdseed.
11 – 12	Books and Magazines.
13 – 14	Cameras & Film Equipment.
15 – 16	Cars.
17 – 18	Chicken.
19 – 20	Children’s Clothing.
21 – 22	Cigarettes and Tobacco.
23 – 24	Distilled Spirits & Liquors.
25 – 26	Flour.
27 – 28	Frozen Foods
29 – 30	Fruits and Vegetables.
31 – 32	Furniture.
33 – 34	Gasoline.
35 – 36	Guns
37 – 38	Hazardous Chemicals.
39 – 40	Heating Oil.
41 – 42	Household Cleaners.
43 – 44	Lawn Supplies.
45 – 46	LP Records and 8-Tracks.
47 – 48	Lumber.
49 – 50	Makeup & Beauty Supplies.
51 –52	Men’s Clothing
53 – 54	Motorcycles.
55 – 56	Movie Reels.
57 – 58	Non-hazardous Chemicals.
59 – 60	Nuts.
61 – 62	Orange Juice.
63 – 64	Paint.
65 – 66	Pharmaceuticals.
67 – 68	Plumbing Fixtures.
69 – 70	Pork Products.
71 – 72	Record Players and Radios.
73 – 74	Salt.
75 – 76	Snack Foods.
77 – 78	Televisions.
79 – 80	Toilet Paper and other Paper Products.
81 – 82	Tools & Hardware.
83 – 84	Toys and Novelties.
85 – 86	Wine.
87 – 88	Women’s Clothing.
89 – 90	Gravel or Asphalt.
91 – 92	Batteries.
93 – 95	Illegal Drugs. (Roll again to determine cover cargo, ignoring results above 92.)
96– 97	Illegal immigrants. (Roll again to determine cover cargo, ignoring results above 92.)
98	1d6 kidnapped young women being sold into sex slavery. (Roll again to determine cover cargo, ignoring results above 92. Women are imprisoned in the trailer, behind a false wall.)
99	Dead Extraterrestrials and parts of a Flying Saucer. (Roll again to determine cover cargo, ignoring results above 92.)
100	A Vampyre’s coffin. (Roll again to determine cover cargo, ignoring results above 92.)

Gas & Diesel Pumps

d12	The gas and diesel are…
1	cheap, but high quality.
2	cheap, and average quality.
3	cheap, but low quality.
4 – 7	average price and quality.
8	average price, but high quality.
9	average price, but low quality.
10	expensive, but high quality.
11	expensive, but only average quality.
12	both expensive and low quality – a real rip-off!

Mechanic

d6	The on-site mechanic is…
1	barely competent.
2	a mechanical genius who can fix anything cheap.
3	an arrogant a**hole who thinks he’s better than everyone else.
4	an ex-con out on parole.
5	rude and crude, but knows his stuff.
6	a shady character who will look the other way at anything illegal – for a price.

Carwashing

d6	**Trucks can be washed by…**
1 – 2	the patrons themselves, with provided rags and soapy water.
3	the owner’s grumbling son.
4	a young man with a bad attitude.
5	an ex-con who needs the job.
6	the owner’s flirty daughter.

Restaurant

d20	*The waitress is…*
1	sassy,
2	kind and understanding,
3	educated and well-spoken,
4	tired and weary,
5	gruff,
6	very pretty,
7	a chain smoker,
8	always gossiping,
9	a thief,
10	sickly-looking,
11	heavy-set,
12	foreign,
13	a teenager,
14	an ex-con,
15	also a prostitute,
16	very flirty,
17 – 18	the owner’s wife,
19	the owner’s daughter,
20	actually a supernatural creature in disguise, (Angel, Devil, Vampyre, Terrestrial Sprite, Amorous Revenent, etc.)

d8	…the food is…
1 – 3	greasy and typical for the area,
4	typical but disgusting,
5 – 6	typical for the area and surprisingly tasty,
7	an unexpected foreign cuisine,
8	only one thing (hamburgers, chili, etc.),

d6	…and the coffee is…
1 – 2	mediocre.
3	strong and tasty.
4 – 5	like burning rubber, but it gets the job done.
6	weak and watery.
7	filled with grounds.
8	vile and fishy.

75% chance the Restaurant has a section where only truckers are allowed to sit.

The Lounge

d20, d6 times.	Besides [2d8] chairs, you see…
1	a radio.
2	a black and white television.
3	a color television.
4	a couch.
5	unemptied ashtrays everywhere.
6	1d8 magazines.
7	1d4 small tables.
8	a pinball machine.
9	an electric fireplace.
10	a cross on the wall.
11	cheap framed paintings.
12	1d4 cheap paperback books.
13	a newspaper.
14	a bible.
15	1d6 religious tracts.
16	knotty pine paneling.
17	taxidermy deer heads on the wall.
18	taxidermy fish on the wall.
19	Teamster Union literature
20	a pool table.

Lounge, Restaurant, and Shop Encounters

d8+d12, 1d6 times	The current patrons include:
2	Jesus or Satan himself, disguised as a trucker. (50% chance of both, playing cards or chess for souls)
3	a lost family on vacation.
4	a women on the run from her bad marriage, or abusive boyfriend.
5	a recently discharged soldier.
6	a highway police officer.
7	1d4 teenagers. (Runaways, hippies, etc.)
8	a happy trucker.
9	a mean trucker looking for trouble.
10	a lonely trucker, looking for company.
11	a biker.
12	a “lot lizard” (prostitute).
13	a trucker couple.
14	a traveling salesman.
15	a pimp. If the prostitutes working this truck stop do not have a pimp, he is looking to recruit them – or else to find runaways he can “turn out”.
16	1d6 musicians on tour.
17	a desperate father, looking for his runaway daughter.
18	a cargo pirate. Looks like any other Trucker. Will be very interested in finding out what any truckers are hauling, so they can steal it.
19	a couple on an interstate crime spree.
20	a serial killer looking for victims. 75% likely to look just like any other trucker.

Bathrooms

d20	This bathroom is…
1 – 3	clean and bright.
4 – 5	clean, but drab.
6 – 7	dreary.
8	disgustingly foul, and looks like it is seldom cleaned.
9 – 10	very dimly-lit.
11	covered in graffiti.
12 – 13	decorated in a nautical theme.
14	covered in newspapers.
15	in the middle of a renovation.
16	oddly modern and fashionable.
17 – 18	a mess, from what looks like a recent fight or struggle.
19	spattered with fresh blood.
20	literally a gateway to Hell.

65% Chance that a Truck Stop actually has separate bathrooms for men and women.

Bathroom Patrons

d20	Besides yourself there is…
1	nobody else.
1 -2	a Biker, or Biker Mama/Old Lady.
3	a Biker, or Biker Mama/Old Lady, taking drugs.
4	a drug dealer.
5	a highway patrolman.
6 – 11	a trucker, or trucker’s wife/girlfriend.
12	a trucker, or trucker’s wife/girlfriend, taking drugs.
13	an ordinary traveler.
14	a teenage runaway.
15	a child by themselves.
16	a migrant worker or musician on tour.
17	a couple having sex in a stall.
18	a “lot lizard” (men’s room) or a pimp (women’s bathroom).
19	a nondescript person apparently waiting for someone else, or someone looking for casual gay sex (late night only).
20	a supernatural creature (Vampyre, Werewolf, Restless Specter, Phantom, etc.)

Showers

d20	The showers are…
1 – 6	clean and cheap.
7	clean, but expensive.
8	clean, cheap, and regularly used for prostitution.
9	clean, expensive, regularly used for prostitution.
10	clean, cheap, and a meeting place for casual gay sex late at night.
11	clean, expensive, and a meeting place for casual gay sex late at night.
12	clean, expensive, and used for prostitution.
13 – 15	filthy and cheap.
16	filthy and expensive.
17	filthy, cheap, and used for prostitution.
18	filthy, expensive, and used for prostitution.
19	filthy, cheap, and a meeting place for casual gay sex late at night.
20	filthy, expensive, and a meeting place for casual gay sex late at night.

Bunks

d6	The bunks are…
1	just 2d6 beds in a single room.
2	small individual rooms, little bigger than the beds.
3	small individual rooms, little bigger than the beds, and very dirty.
4	almost like regular motel rooms.
5	almost like regular motel rooms, but very expensive.
6	almost like regular motel rooms, but very dirty.

Laundry

d12	The laundry facility is…
1	small, but clean.
2	small and filthy.
3	small, filthy, and the floor is wet.
4 – 5	average in size, and clean.
6	average in size, but filthy.
7	average in size and the floor is wet.
8	large, but clean.
9	large and filthy.
10	large, filthy, and the floor is wet.
11 – 12	full-service, and truckers can drop off laundry to be picked-up later.

Vending Machines

d20, 2d4 times	The vending machines dispense
1	adhesive bandages.
2	antihistamines.
3	aspirin.
4 – 5	caffeine pills
6	candies (other than chocolate).
7	chocolate bars
8	coffee.
9	cola.
10	deodorant
11	ginger-ale.
12	iced-tea.
13	knives.
14	peanuts.
15	potato chips.
16	pretzels.
17	shaving razors.
18	shoelaces.
19	soap.
20	toothpaste.

Repeated rolls indicate a wide selection of the indicated item.

Shop Items

d100, 2d6 times.	In the shop you’ll find…
1 – 3	8-track cassettes.
4	a guitar.
5 – 6	air fresheners.
7 – 8	bibles.
9 – 10	blankets & pillows.
11 – 12	boots.
13 – 14	chewing gum.
15	children’s clothing.
16	children’s toys.
17 – 23	chocolates & candy (other than gum).
24 – 29	cigarettes and tobacco products.
30 – 31	comic books.
32 – 33	condoms.
34 – 35	dashboard ornaments.
36 – 37	flowers.
38 – 39	guns & ammunition.
40 – 41	incense.
42 – 47	jerky and dried sausages.
48 – 49	knives.
50 – 51	magazines.
52 – 53	men’s clothing.
54 – 55	money orders
56 – 57	newspapers.
58 – 63	novelty mudflaps.
64 – 65	painkillers, allergy medicine, & adhesive bandages.
66 – 67	paperback books.
68 – 69	plastic sheeting.
70 – 72	portable radios.
73 – 78	potato chips, pork rinds and pretzels.
79 – 80	rope & duck tape.
81 – 82	seat covers.
83	shovels
84 – 85	soap.
86 – 90	soda / pop.
91	souvenir spoons.
92 – 93	surprisingly cheap cigarettes.
94 – 95	tire irons.
96 – 97	tire repair kits.
98	women’s clothing.
99 – 100	wrenches.

A repeated result indicates an especially large selection of the indicated item.

Drugs

d6	If you’re looking to score something stronger than coffee, you can get…
1	nothing else here – the owner doesn’t tolerate drug dealing.
2	Speed (amphetamine pills)…
3	Crank (methamphetamine)…
4	Cocaine
5	Marijuana…
6	Speed, Crank, Cocaine, and Marijuana…

d10	from…
1	a Biker stationed in the parking lot.
2	a guy in the Lounge.
3	the shopkeeper (or owner).
4	the cook in the restaurant.
5	the waitress in the restaurant.
6	the mechanic.
7	the car washer (or a guy hanging out by the washing station)
8	a “lot lizard”.
9	the local pimp.
10	the back of a truck that never seems to leave the lot.

“Lot Lizards”

d10	At this truck stop, the prostitute(s) is/are…
1 – 2	not welcome – the owner calls the police as soon as they show up.
3 – 4	1d4 adult(s) working for a pimp. (Ages are 17+d12.)
5 – 6	1d4 adult(s) working independently. (Ages are 17+d20.)
7 – 8	1d4 middle-aged adult(s) working independently. (Ages are 35+d20.)
9	1d4 foreign adult(s) working for a pimp. (Ages are 17+d12.)
10	1d4 adolescent(s) working for a pimp. (Ages are 11+d6.) (Naturally, you should ignore or re-roll this result if you find the possibility too distressing, or you’d rather not play out any “Taxi Driver”-like vigilante scenarios.)

95% chance a prostitute is female, and 5% chance a prostitute is male. (If the prostitute is male there is a 50% chance he is cross-dressed.)
50% chance the prostitute is an alcoholic.
50% chance the prostitute is a drug addict. (Determine alcoholism and drug addiction separately. Many prostitutes are both alcoholics and drug-addicts.)
25% chance a prostitute will attempt to steal money or valuables.
25% chance a prostitute carries a sexually transmitted disease.
10% chance a prostitute is a distraction for something else. (Cargo theft, a CIA mind control experiment, etc.)
5% chance an adult prostitute is actually an undercover cop.
1% chance a prostitute is actually a supernatural creature in disguise. (Angel of Mercy, Seducer Devil, Terrestrial Sprite, Amorous Revenant, Restless Specter, Witch, Werewolf, Vampyre, the Incarnation of Death, etc.)

Face of a Female (or Cross-Dressed) Prostitute

D6, five times	Skin	Eyes	Hair Color	Hair Style	Makeup
1	Very pale	Blue	Blonde	Bouffont or Beehive	Heavy and garish
2	Pale	Green	Light Brown	Afro	Heavy eye-makup only
3	Tanned	Gray	Red	Short, pixie or bob	Surprisingly well-done
4	Olive	Light Brown	Black	Long and straight	Badly-applied
5	Dark Olive	Dark Brown	Dirty Blonde	Flip	Surprising, non-standard colors
6	Black	Hazel	Dark Brown	Pigtails	None

Clothing of a Female (or Cross-Dressed) Prostitute

d6, four times	Jacket	Shirt	Pants / Dress	Shoes
1	Denim	Unbuttoned shirt or blouse, tied in the front	Mini-skirt *	Platform shoes
2	Leather	Brassiere / babydoll / lingerie top.	Hot-pants *	Mary janes
3	Short fur	Peasant blouse	Tights	Pumps
4	Suede, with fringed sleeves	Dashiki	Tight, bell-bottom jeans	Slippers
5	Short wool	T-shirt	Plaid skirt *	Flip-flops or sandals
6	Long wool	Camisole	Culottes *	Go Go boots

*d4: 1 = knee socks, 2=fishnet stocking, 3=pantyhose, 4=thigh high stockings, 5 – 6 = bare legs.

Male prostitutes not cross-dressed will usually look like any other Truck Stop patron.

“Lot Lizard” Hopes and Dreams

d20	If you catch them off guard, they might confess they want to…
1	go to Los Angeles and become a movie star
2	go to New York and become a Broadway star.
3	become a clothing designer.
4	open an auto shop.
5	open a bowling alley.
6	save up enough to buy a little cafe.
7	become a trucker themselves.
8	become a hairdresser.
9	escape “the life”, but it doesn’t seem possible.
10	become a madam / pimp themselves.
11	eventually get married and have a family.
12	become a preacher, and bring the good news of Jesus to other prostitutes.
13	get revenge on the relative that abused them as a child.
14	get revenge on the guy /girl who first got them hooked on dope, and made them start turning tricks.
15	get revenge on the serial killer they once escaped from.
16	get revenge on the cop who keeps extorting “freebies”.
17	write a book about their experiences.
18	contact the extraterrestrials, and escape this “sh*thole planet”.
19	find the Vampyre that supposedly hunts along this highway, and beg to be made immortal.
20	just go home, but they’re too ashamed.

Pimps

d20	The local pimp is…
1 – 3	an obviously violent and abusive monster.
4	actually the owner of the Truck Stop
5 – 6	a flamboyantly-dressed man.
7 – 9	a smooth-talking, well-dressed seducer.
10 – 11	a twitchy drug-addict.
12 – 13	an apparently even-tempered man in a suit.
14 – 15	a biker.
16 – 17	dressed like any other trucker.
18	actually the father or mother of a prostitute.
19	a nondescript man who looks like a typical suburban dad.
20	actually an extraterrestrial, or supernatural being.

Rumors and Gossip

d20	The current rumor around the Truck Stop is…
1	there’s a ghost rig that’s got no driver, but tries to run cars off the road.
2	there’s a killer working this highway, preying on girls.
3	U.F.O.s are constantly seen along this stretch of road.
4	every Wednesday night the parking lot becomes the place where every pimp in the state comes to trade prostitutes.
5	there’s a pack of werewolves that roam the area.
6	Jesus drives a rig that occasionally pulls into this lot!
7	the lot is built atop an Indian Burial Ground, and cursed.
8	the owner actually works for the C.I.A.
9	the owner takes a cut of every illegal deal that occurs here.
10	the owners wife /husband is buried under the parking lot.
11	the place is used as meeting ground by foreign spies.
12	the “Lot Lizards” all work for the KGB.
13	the road nearby is haunted by a Phantom Hitchhiker.
14	after 2 AM, a man with no face sometimes wander the edge of the parking lot.
15	the Apocalypse will begin soon, with a battle of Angels and Demons in the parking lot.
16	the ghost of a legendary driver still pulls their phantom rig into the parking lot.
17	unmarked military vehicles drive by occasionally. They don’t look like the U.S. Army, or even the National Guard.
18	One of the Lot Lizards is murdering truckers.
19	The Government puts tiny tracking devices into the gas, so they can track you everywhere you go.
20	The highway exits for Heaven and Hell are both nearby.

Truck Stop Events

d20	Unexpectedly…
1	a truck careens into the parking lot, hitting several parked rigs.
2	a bloodied woman escapes from the sleeping compartment of a parked truck.
3	1d4 police cars arrive to arrest the Lot Lizards (and their pimp if present).
4	you see a “lot lizard” douching with cola in the parking lot.
5	a Rock n’ Roll or Country & Western band’s tour bus pulls in.
6	a U.F.O appears overhead.
7	rival truckers (or bikers) begin shooting at each other.
8	there’s a stabbing in the Lounge (or Laundry Room).
9	blood is bubbling up from the drains in the showers.
10	a rig explodes in the parking lot.
11	a black luxury car with blacked-out windows and government license plates pulls into the lot. Out of it come 2d4 men in black suits and sunglasses, who proceed to break open the back of every trailer, and interrogate every trucker about their cargo.
12	a body falls from the sky.
13	an armed gang of obvious former prostitutes starts shooting at the pimp who runs the “lot lizards” here, or a violent pimp appears and begins roughing up a “lot lizard” until she agrees to work for him.
14	Mindless Revenants begin encircling the Truck Stop.
15	a rabid dog wanders into the parking lot, and begins attacking.
16	a van (or bus) full of “Jesus Freaks” pulls into the lot.
17	a van (or bus) full of nuns singing hymns pulls into the lot.
18	a van (or bus) full of Hare Krishnas pulls into the lot.
19	a film crew shooting a documentary wants to interview truckers and travelers.
20	a car full of rich college kids pulls in, looking to buy drugs and/or pickup prostitutes.

Mysterious Road Exits off the Uncanny Highway

10 Monday Aug 2020

Posted by Daniel James Hanley in Gothic Gaming, GROOVY Ghastly Affair, Historical Gaming, Random Tables, Uncanny Highway, Weird

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There are many unmarked exits off the Uncanny Highway of U.S. Route 28. Should anyone be curious (and foolish) enough to follow one, roll on the following table.

d100	This mysterious exit off the highway eventually leads to…
1 – 2	a volunteer firehouse.
3 – 4	a roller-rink.
5 – 6	a machine-gun firing range.
7 – 8	a brothel. (5% likely to actually be a part of a C.I.A. mind control experiment.)
9 – 10	the clubhouse of a motorcycle club (or gang).
11 – 12	a “gravity hill” (Place were objects appear to roll uphill.)
13 – 14	an abandoned hospital. (30% chance that all equipment was abandoned and left in place.)
15 – 16	an abandoned asylum. (30% chance that all equipment was abandoned and left in place.)
17 – 18	an abandoned drive-thru.
19 – 20	a Native American Reservation.
21 – 22	an abandoned house. (50% likely to be filled with Satanic graffiti.)
23 – 24	a strange house. (d8. The strange feature of the house is its: 1 = unusual architectural style. 2 = unusual materials. 3 = strangely colored windows. 4 = complete lack of windows. 5 = lack of any apparent door. 6 = holiday decorations kept up all year. 7 = obvious lack of electricity or telephone wires. 8 = odd paint-job.
25 – 26	a bizarre sculpture made of discarded items.
27 – 28	a working farm. (25% chance the farm is worked by a cult.)
29 – 30	an abandoned farm. (10% likely it is now a criminal hideout.)
31 – 32	a farm stand selling fresh produce. (Abandoned in winter.)
33 – 34	a lone, abandoned windmill.
35 – 36	a deserted town.
37 – 38	a mine.
39 – 40	an isolated, but functioning town. (25% chance the local “festival” is occurring)
41 – 42	a forgotten state (or national) park.
43 – 44	a factory. (10% chance all signage is in an unidentifiable language and alphabet, and it is impossible to figure out what the factory is producing).
45 – 46	an abandoned factory. (50% chance it is used teenagers for drinking and sex).
47 – 48	a well-maintained cemetery. (10% chance the tombstones are inscribed in a foreign, or unknown language.)
49 – 50	an overgrown, abandoned cemetery. (50% likely the deceased were members of an obscure religious cult.)
51 – 52	a natural cave. (30% likely to be a state park, or operated for profit.)
53 – 54	a pond or lake.
55 – 56	a field where a trailer or RV is parked.
57 – 58	a clearing where 1d4 unoccupied tents are pitched. (10% likely to find blood spattered inside the tents)
59 – 60	an active hobo camp.
61 – 62	an abandoned train depot.
63 – 64	an abandoned garage.
65 – 66	a utility complex. (Electric generator, sewage treatment plant, etc.)
67 – 68	a garbage dump.
69 – 70	a toxic (or radioactive) waste dump. (Save versus Constitution each Turn or become sickened.)
71 – 72	a bomb shelter.
73 – 74	an isolated church. (5% chance the religion practiced here isn’t Christianity at all.)
75 – 76	a Christian shrine. (25% chance the Saint honored is otherwise unknown.)
77 – 78	a pagan shrine.
79 – 80	a secret germ-warfare laboratory.
81 – 82	A C.I.A. (or K.G.B.) safehouse.
83 – 84	a solitary artist’s studio.
85 – 86	an active military base. (5% chance the soldiers are not American.)
87 – 88	an abandoned military base. (25% chance the evidence of a strange experiment is still here.)
89	a secret military base housing a U.F.O.
90 – 91	a dry well shaft. (5% chance a child is currently at the bottom.)
92 – 93	a serial killer’s dump site. (1d12 bodies)
94 – 95	an abandoned car (or truck). (Determine vehicle characteristics as you would for a car on the road.)
96	an abandoned plane (or helicopter).
97	literally Nowhere – it continues on infinitely.
98	Hell.
100	Heaven.

Random CB Radio Handles from the Uncanny Highway

04 Monday May 2020

Posted by Daniel James Hanley in Gothic Gaming, GROOVY Ghastly Affair, Historical Gaming, Random Tables, Uncanny Highway, Weird

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Although it has actually existed in the United States since the 1940s, CB (“Citizens Band”) radio really came of age with technological advances in the late 1960s. It exploded in popularity during the 70s – especially among truckers. By the 1970s most users were identifying themselves by self-chosen names, or “handles”, rather than the assigned call signs that were technically required under the law. In fact, before 1983 it was actually illegal to use a CB without a license in the U.S. – most users simply ignored the law, which was almost never enforced. In the days before the Internet and mobile phones, CB radio was the best means for truckers (and other drivers) to keep informed about hazards and opportunities along the road. And on the Uncanny Highway, the hazards of the road can be strange indeed!

Some results on the following table give two options separated by a slash. In general, GMs and Presenters can use the first option for a male, and the second for a female. Of course, players can also use the table to decide on CB handles for their PCs.

d20, twice	You’re listening to…
1	Rubber	Guy / Gal
2	Hard / Silky	Hawk / Dove
3	Shadow	Rider
4	Fearless	Trucker
5	Flyin’	Driver
6	Lovin’	Bull / Butch
7	Christian	Dave / Jane (or other name)
8	Speedy	Smoker (or Toker)
9	Big	Daddy / Momma
10	Fightin’	Soldier
11	Steel	Roller
12	Ohio (or other state)	Dog (or Doggy)
13	Mountain	Man / Woman
14	Rockin’	Duck
15	Groovy	Hauler
16	Swinging	Hammer / Fingers
17	Smooth	Eagle / Swan
18	American	Racer
19	Sergeant	King / Queen
20	Sweet	Stallion / Bee

Random Bar Stories from the Uncanny Highway, Part Two – Tales Told by Women

28 Tuesday Apr 2020

Posted by Daniel James Hanley in Gothic Gaming, GROOVY Ghastly Affair, Historical Gaming, Random Tables, Uncanny Highway, Weird

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20th Century, Adventure Seeds, American Horror, Americana, Ghastly Affair, Gothic Gaming, Gothic Horror, GROOVY Ghastly Affair, Groovy Horror, Middle America, Midwest Horror, Prairie Horror, Road Trip, Rural America, scenerio seeds, Seventies, Sixties, story seeds

Like last week’s “Tales Told By Men”, the following conversation starters can be used to add depth and color to NPCs, or as scenario seeds for adventures along the Uncanny Highway of the 1960s and 70s.

Remember that the 1960s were very sexist times, and in many towns single women could not actually sit at a bar and order drinks. In some places, women were prohibited from even entering drinking establishments unless they were accompanied by men. Some bars banned women altogether. By the 1970s, however, most gender-segregated bars were being legally forced to end their discriminatory practices. Of course, along the Uncanny Highway one can’t even be sure that all the patrons of a bar are human!

(d12, d6) The obviously tipsy woman says:

d6	I just left my man because…
1	he is cheating on me with his secretary.
2	I caught him with my own sister!
3	I found out he is actually a wanted criminal.
4	he has a whole other family in another state!
5	I found his disgusting collection of “dirty magazines”.
6	he beat me up again, but for the last time.

d6	My best friend…
1	wants me to get involved as one of her “distributors”. Somebody else told me its a “pyramid scheme”, but I don’t know.
2	wants me to go to some weird “self-help” seminar in the city.
3	know the number of a guy in the city who helps out women who’ve got a certain kind of problem. You know what I mean.
4	just joined this commune where they share everything. I mean, everything!
5	has been acting really weird lately, like she’s been replaced with a robot or something.
6	has been missing for a week now.

d6	Some guy is following me, and…
1	he’s just come into this bar.
2	I don’t think he’s even human.
3	nobody else can see him.
4	I know its because of what I saw.
5	I think he’s that guy who kidnapped all those women.
6	if he keeps it up he’s going to get shot!

d6	My family is driving me nuts because…
1	they keep wanting me to have a baby.
2	they want me to quit my job.
3	they want me to get married to some guy I’ve never met.
4	they want me to take my children to “The Festival”. Understand, my family been doing it for a very long time, but I just don’t want to any more.
5	I won’t take in my Grandma, even though she only eats raw meat.
6	my husband won’t loan my loser brother any more money.

d6	*My child* died because…**
1	he was born without skin. The doctor insists the chemical factory had nothing to do with it.
2	my little boy killed her. Nobody believes me, but I know he’s evil.
3	he wandered off to that old abandoned house.
4	she ran onto the highway.
5	the Satanists killed her, and made it look like an accident.
6	some strange poison gas was released from the military base.

d6	*I know it sounds crazy, but I* think my husband might be…**
1	a murderer.
2	planning to kill me.
3	a Satanist.
4	an alien.
5	a Soviet agent.
6	married to another woman.

d6	I just saw…
1	a man forcing a woman into a car in the parking lot.
2	someone being murdered!
3	a U.F.O.!
4	a werewolf!
5	an angel.
6	my own double!

d6	I found Jesus…
1	in women’s prison. But I swear I didn’t put that poison my husband’s drink.
2	after my family died in a gas explosion. Like I told the police, I was out visiting friends, and still feel so guilty.
3	and stopped hooking. Well, mostly.
4	after my boyfriend shot me and left me for dead.
5	after my children went missing.
6	when he stepped out of that U.F.O.

d6	I’ve lost…
1	my children, and need someone to help me find them.
2	my memory. How did I get here?
3	my way. Where am I?
4	my purse, and need someone to help me out.
5	a small package wrapped in brown paper. If you find it, don’t shake it.
6	my soul.

d6	I know you won’t believe it, but…
1	I can read your aura.
2	my dog can speak.
3	my child is the reincarnation of a soldier killed in the Second World War.
4	there’s a puddle of blood and slime in the restroom.
5	I’m actually nobility.
6	I can speak to the dead.

d6	It’s funny that…
1	my husband actually thinks it was his idea for us to become swingers!
2	nobody believes witches are real anymore.
3	some people think women are weak, because I just killed a man with my bare hands.
4	the P.T.A. thinks I’m a bad parent, with what I know about them!
5	people don’t realize what’s buried under the trailer park.
6	no one sees that Satan is alive and well – and living in this town!

d6	I know I shouldn’t think this, but…
1	my kids aren’t really mine at all.
2	maybe it’s a cop that’s responsible for all those body parts they keep finding on the side of the road.
3	I suspect my pastor knows more than he’s telling about those kids who disappeared last week.
4	I don’t think the soldiers that passed through town are even American.
5	I just want to run away from my family and go somewhere, anywhere, else.
6	clowns are sexy.

Random Bar Stories from the Uncanny Highway, Part One – Tales Told by Men

21 Tuesday Apr 2020

Posted by Daniel James Hanley in Gothic Gaming, GROOVY Ghastly Affair, Historical Gaming, Random Tables, Uncanny Highway, Weird

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If you visit any of the fine drinking establishments that line the Uncanny Highway of U.S. Route 28, you are guaranteed to encounter a man with a story to tell. Buy him another drink, and listen as he enlightens you.

The following tables assume the same 1960s and 1970s time frame as the other entries in the “Uncanny Highway” series. Naturally, many would also make good subjects for Country & Western songs!

(d12, d6) The obviously tipsy man says:

d6	*My wife ran off with….*
1	my best friend.
2	my own brother.
3	some college kid.
4	that guy who was working on our house.
5	a biker.
6	another woman.

d6	*My dog was killed by…*
1	a speeding big-rig. I didn’t get a look at the guy. Come to think of it, I don’t remember even seeing a driver at all.
2	my own wife. After she came back from that trip, he was growling at her all the time, and wouldn’t let her pet him any more.
3	my no-good neighbor, because my ol’ boy was digging up something in the yard.
4	some wild animal. I don’t know what it was exactly, but it sure was big!
5	frickin’ Satanists. They’re everywhere around here.
6	space aliens. They cut out his eyes and drained all his blood!

d6	*My best friend…*
1	is apparently banging my wife. I think I’m gonna do something about it – after I get good and liquored up!
2	turned out to be “one of them”. You know what I mean.
3	ratted on me to the IRS. I found those gold coins buried with that skeleton on my property, so I own them, fair and square.
4	just married some foreign chick who’s apparently “allergic to sunlight”.
5	is a cop, so I can get away with anything.
6	told me about some money supposedly stashed in an abandoned house.

d6	*I’m waiting to be arrested, ‘cause I just killed…*
1	my cheating wife.
2	that bastard that’s been banging my wife.
3	my cheating wife and her bastard lover.
4	my own brother.
5	the man they sent to kill me.
6	the sheriff.

d6	*I lost all my money…*
1	in Los Vegas.
2	to my wife in the divorce.
3	to that bastard I used to be in business with.
4	to the goddamn IRS.
5	playing the ponies.
6	on a bad real estate deal.

d6	I lost my job because…
1	some weird illegal immigrants took it. Funny thing is, I can’t even figure out what country they’re supposed to be from. They don’t speak any language I ever heard of.
2	of stupid Government regulations. We had to stop digging on that hill, but they wouldn’t tell us why.
3	someone made completely false allegations against me. I never met any of those women.
4	the boss’ wife thinks I “look like a criminal”.
5	the place got burned down. I think the boss did it for the insurance money.
6	my boss didn’t actually have any licenses or permits for what we were doing. Now, I can’t even find the bastard.

d6	*I just made some easy money…*
1	at the track.
2	burying some sacks for a guy. I didn’t ask what was inside, but they smelled really bad.
3	pouring a concrete floor for some guy who needed it done fast.
4	selling my camera and the pictures inside to a guy dressed in a black suit and sunglasses.
5	moving furniture in the middle of the night.
6	soundproofing a guy’s basement, and installing metal rings on the walls. He paid me much more than the job really costs. He also wanted a stain resistant floor that would be easy to mop up, but I don’t do floors.

d6	*I just saw….*
1	a ghost!
2	Bigfoot!
3	a U.F.O.!
3	Jesus!
4	the Devil!
5	a freakin’ tiger roaming the woods!
6	what a Federal agent look like without it’s human disguise!

d6	**I don’t trust The Government, because…**
1	I saw them packing dope in the body bags when I was in ‘Nam
2	the FBI just arrested my brother, who had nothing to do with those girls disappearing.
3	I’ve actually been aboard a U.F.O., and met the aliens. They look like you and me, but with big black eyes. You know, I could take you to meet them.
4	my pastor told me about all the Commies, International Bankers, and Radical Feminists that have infiltrated Congress.
5	when I was a cop they actually tried to recruit me into the Satanic coven that runs Washington D.C.
6	my friend whose a doctor told me the fluoride they put in the water is actually a Soviet plot to make Americans too weak to resist a takeover.

d6	*I found Jesus…*
1	in prison. That’s when I got this here tattoo.
2	on the battlefield. Let me show you my scars.
3	in the midst of my divorce. The Lord told me he would take her back home to Heaven, and he did!
4	after my wife got murdered. They never did find out who did it, and I doubt they ever will.
5	when I was getting off junk. After the bugs stopped crawling under my skin, I saw The Lord clear as day.
6	while I was banging a hooker. I think she still works the truck-stop nearby.

d6	I bet you…
1	can’t tell what I’ve got hidden in my shirt. Go on, guess!
2	don’t know why I’ve got this here silver bullet.
3	can’t beat me at arm-wrestling.
4	can’t guess what I’ve got in my car. It’s a doozy!
5	don’t know why that guy over there is staring at us.
6	want to know about the weird crap that’s been going on.

d6	I’m leaving this town, because…
1	I found a good job driving delivery trucks from town to town. I could set you up too, if you can keep your mouth shut.
2	I got myself a “mail-order bride”. I swear she’s the most beautiful woman I’ve even seen. Thing is, she was raised in some weird religion that won’t let her eat salt, or have any iron in the house.
3	of all the weird murders.
4	There’s some guy who looks just like me doing some messed-up stuff, and the cops have got it in for me.
5	I know what what’s really going on with all the new construction around the old military base.
6	I just know something really bad is about to happen.

Roadside Bars of the Uncanny Highway – U.S. Route 28

14 Tuesday Apr 2020

Posted by Daniel James Hanley in Gothic Gaming, GROOVY Ghastly Affair, Historical Gaming, Random Tables, Uncanny Highway, Weird

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Like the other generators in the “Uncanny Highway – U.S. Route 28” series, the following tables assume a time-frame of the mid 1960s to mid 1970s.

Initial Impression of the Bar

d10	The bar is named for…
1 – 2	a woman. (“Shirley’s”, “Mother’s Bar”, “Flo’s Place”, etc.)
2 – 4	a man. (“Jake’s Roadhouse”, “Harry’s”, “Nick’s Pub”, etc.)
5	an animal. (“The Stallion”, “Eagle Inn”, “Black Cat Tavern”, etc.)
6	a local geographical feature. (“Mount George Inn”, “Black River Tavern”, “Bald Hill Bar”, etc.)
7	an occupation. (“The Miner”, “Trucker’s Tavern”, “Huntsman’s Lodge”, etc.)
8	an inanimate object (or objects). (“Cannon Club”, “Big Rig Inn”, “Five Nails”, etc.)
9	a foreign locale. (“German Inn”, “Old England Bar”, “China Saloon”, etc.)
10	another kind of business or establishment. (“Junkyard Bar”, “The Abbey Lounge”, “Factory Bar”, etc.)

d12	The bar’s sign is…
1	intact neon letter above the door
2	neon and above the door, but with 1d4 letters burned out or broken.
3	cut out letters affixed above the door.
4	cut out letters affixed above the door, with 1d4 letters missing.
5	nicely painted above the door.
6	crudely painted above the door.
7	painted directly on the front door.
8	a wooden plaque affixed to the facade.
9	a painted banner hang above the door.
10	just a painted A-frame standing outside the door.
11	lettered on the front windows.
12	apparently missing.

d12	The exterior of the building is…
1 – 2	a flat-topped brick structure.
3 – 5	a flat-topped wooden structure with clapboard siding.
6	an ordinary wooden house.
7	an ordinary brick house.
8	a faux “Tudor” (half-timber) structure.
9	a faux Polynesian (Tiki) structure.
10	faux adobe (or actual adobe in the Southwest).
11	a faux “Old West” saloon with a “boomtown” facade.
12	a railway car.

25% chance of one or two gas pumps outside building. If there are two, one will be regular gas, and the other diesel.

d12	The bar appears to attract primarily…
1 – 2	blue-collar workers.
3	bikers.
4	truckers.
5	old men.
6	Country Music fans in cowboy and cowgirl outfits.
7	college kids.
8	young singles looking for partners.
9	people of a single ethnicity (other than white American).
10	police.
11	swinging couples.
12	the gay community. (LGBT+ people, but that term didn’t exist in the 1960s or 1970s.)

d8	The condition of the building is…
1	excellent.
2 – 4	generally good.
5	poor due to neglect.
6	poor due to obvious vandalism.
7	badly weathered.
8	mostly good, but there are bullet holes in the side.

d8	The parking lot is…
1	very small, but only partially filled.
2	very small, and completely filled.
3	moderately sized, and largely empty.
4	moderately sized, and half empty.
5	moderately sized, but mostly filled.
6	large, and largely empty.
7	large, and half-filled.
8	large, half-filled, and evidently a popular trolling ground for prostitutes.

The types of vehicles in the parking lot will be consistent with the primary patrons. Motorcycles in a biker bar, pickup trucks for Country Music fans, station wagons for suburban swinging couples, etc.

Inside the Bar

d20	The interior décor is…
1 – 5	unremarkable / consistent with the bar’s name and exterior.
6	filled with military memorabilia.
7	filled with local memorabilia.
8	filled with music memorabilia (appropriate to primary patrons).
9	a faux Irish pub.
10	faux German.
11	faux Medieval.
12	a faux barn.
13	Viking-themed.
14	Mexican-themed.
15	filled with hunting trophies.
16	filled with fishing trophies.
17	festooned with Christmas lights.
18	nautical-themed.
19	Tiki.
20	psychedelic.

d10	The behavior of the patrons is….
1 – 4	like those of any average bar of its type.
5	rowdy and belligerent.
6	friendly and welcoming.
7	extremely unfriendly to outsiders.
8	joyless, and oddly mechanical.
9	quietly menacing.
10	the complete opposite of what one would expect.

d20	The inside smells primarily like…
1 – 8	cigarettes.
9 – 10	cooking meat.
11 – 12	deep-fry oil
13	sweat.
14	incense.
15	mold.
16	dirt.
17	body odor.
18	rotten wood.
19	dry wood.
20	nothing in particular.

d20	The floor is…
1	faux-brick linoleum (or vinyl).
2	faux-wood linoleum (or vinyl).
3	faux-stone linoleum (or vinyl).
4 – 5	patterned linoleum (or vinyl).
6	badly-cracked, faux-brick linoleum (or vinyl).
7	badly-cracked, faux-wood linoleum (or vinyl).
8	badly-cracked, faux-stone linoleum (or vinyl).
9 – 10	badly-cracked, patterned linoleum (or vinyl).
11 – 12	black and white checkerboard tiles.
13	bare concrete.
14 – 15	badly-worn wood.
16 – 17	stained wood.
18 – 19	painted wood.
20	wood parquet.

40% chance the floor is covered with sawdust.

d100	If the floor is searched, you will find…
1 – 9	nothing special besides cigarette butts and beer. (If floor is sawdust, beer will be soaked up.)
10 – 11	an especially large quantity of nut shells.
12 – 13	dead insects.
14 – 15	someone’s wallet (with d100 dollars).
16 – 17	a glob of spit, still wet. (Roll again if floor is sawdust.)
18 – 19	spattered paint. (If floor is sawdust, paint is underneath.)
20 – 21	food wrapping from a nearby eatery.
22 – 23	1d6 spent bullet casings.
24 – 25	dried blood.
26 – 27	a condom (25% chance to be used.)
28 – 29	a set of house keys.
30 – 31	a pair of panties.
32 – 33	a lady’s stocking.
34 – 35	a pair of men’s underwear.
36 – 37	a woman’s anklet.
38 – 39	a wedding ring (Equal chances to be a man’s or a woman’s.)
40 – 41	a broken necklace.
42 – 43	broken glass.
44 – 45	a lost police shield.
46 – 47	a child’s toy.
48 – 49	a store receipt (25% chance the combination of items has disturbing implications. For example: rope, plastic sheeting, duct tape, nylon stockings, a dog collar, bleach, and a set of knives.)
50 – 51	a phone number written on a napkin.
52 – 53	“Help” written on a napkin in a woman’s handwriting.
54 – 54	a business card.
55 – 56	an unexploded firecracker.
57 – 58	unused tickets for a local Amusement Park.
59 – 60	a strange occult design faintly scrawled on the floor in chalk.
61 – 62	a woman’s shoe.
63 – 64	the broken heel from a high-heeled shoe.
65 – 66	a man’s shoe or boot.
67 – 68	a severed finger. (50% either a man’s or woman’s.)
69 – 70	1d4 human teeth.
71 – 72	a small, bloody knife. (Any sawdust on the floor will be stuck to knife along with the blood.)
73 – 74	a page from a Bible, with a verse circled.
75 – 76	a page from a phone book, with a name circled.
77 – 78	a religious tract.
79 – 80	a gemstone, evidently fallen from a ring.
81 – 82	a muddy shoe-print.
83 – 84	a small puddle of urine. (If floor is sawdust, urine will be soaked up.)
85 – 86	two halves of a ripped photograph. (Equal chances to be of a man or a woman.)
87 – 88	a watch. (25% chance to be an expensive brand.)
89 – 90	a dead mouse.
91 – 92	a live mouse.
93 – 94	a crumpled break-up letter.
95 – 96	a broken pencil.
97 – 98	a chicken bone.
99 – 100	a local guidebook, with a bloody fingerprint.

People and Events

d8	The bartender appears to be a(n)…
1	attractive young woman, (5% chance she is also the owner.)
2	young woman, (50% chance she is also the owner.)
3	handsome, middle-aged man, (25% chance he is also the owner.)
4	middle-aged man, (75% chance he is also the owner.)
5	attractive middle-aged woman, (75% chance she is also the owner.)
6	middle-aged woman, (75% chance she is also the owner.)
7	older man, (85% chance she is also the owner.)
8	older woman, (95% chance she is also the owner.)

d100	…with…
1 – 3	one eye.
4 – 6	an obvious scar.
7 – 9	missing teeth.
10 – 12	glasses.
13 – 15	a lisp.
16 – 18	a filthy mouth.
19 – 21	a dog behind the counter.
22 – 24	a pistol on their hip.
25 – 27	notably large breasts / muscles.
28 – 30	badly dyed hair.
31 – 33	an out-of-date hairstyle.
34 – 36	unfashionable clothes.
37 – 39	a very fashionable outfit.
40 – 42	a flamboyant manner of pouring drinks.
43 – 45	a distinct lack of education.
46 – 48	an obviously high level of education.
49 – 51	strange jewelry.
52 – 54	many tattoos. (50% likely to be blue prison tattoos inked with cigarette ash and spit.)
55 – 57	a bad leg.
58 – 60	a bad attitude.
61 – 63	a sympathetic ear for all patrons
64 – 66	no interest in hearing your problems.
67 – 69	an uncanny insight into their patrons’ true desires
70 – 72	seemingly endless stories about their past.
73 – 75	a “catch phrase” that they always seem to work into any conversation.
76 – 78	extremely racist and prejudicial opinions.
79 – 81	an eagerness to share the Good News of Jesus Christ.
82 – 84	strong belief in various conspiracy theories.
85 – 87	professed psychic abilities.
88 – 90	a hatred of hippies and “reds”.
91 – 93	a sympathetic view of hippies and the counterculture.
94 – 95	an encyclopedic knowledge of liquor.
96 – 97	an eagerness to share the teachings of their Guru.
98 – 99	a strangely archaic way of speaking.
100	a striking resemblance to someone famous. (10% chance they actually are that person – or their clone!)

d100	Your attention is attracted by…
1 – 11	a fight breaking among 2d4 patrons.
12 – 13	a man with a flamboyant cowboy outfit.
14 – 15	a pair of identical twins.
16 – 17	a man with a loaded pistol set in front of him.
18 – 19	a plain, small, and unassuming woman who is easily consuming more whiskey than seems possible. She has already drunk several men “under the table”.
20 – 21	a nun.
22 – 23	a beautiful woman, dressed like a high-fashion model, and wearing sunglasses. She drinks alone.
24 – 25	an artist drawing portraits.
26 – 27	a photographer taking snapshots.
28 – 29	a police detective showing someone’s photograph to patrons.
30 – 31	a nervous man who stares at everyone entering the bar.
32 – 33	a silent man in sunglasses, wearing a black suit and fedora. His briefcase in on the table or bar.
34 – 35	a man playing solitaire with an a strange set of cards.
36 – 37	a woman reading palms.
38 – 39	1d4 clown(s).
40 – 41	a Native American, dressed in a traditional outfit.
42 – 43	a group of 1d4+1 men playing “pinfinger” or “five finger fillet” with a knife and their outstretched hands.
44 – 45	a man with 1d4 obviously frightened young women.
46 – 47	a preacher (or other devotee) handing out religious tracts.
48 – 49	a young women approaching one patron after another, begging for a ride.
50 – 51	1d4 hippies.
52 – 53	a middle-aged woman looking for her husband.
54 – 55	a man with a long white beard hanging to his belly.
56 – 57	a breathtakingly beautiful woman who is collecting free drinks.
58 – 59	1d4 police who have entered the bar to make an arrest. (If the bar primarily serves LGTQ+ people, the police may be arresting the patrons. If the bar has strippers, the police may be arresting the dancers, or the owner.)
60 – 61	1 or 2 masked men with guns who suddenly burst in and demand money.
62 – 63	a dog wandering around the bar.
64 – 65	a black cat wandering around the bar.
66 – 67	a man who runs into the bar, yelling that he just encountered a U.F.O.
68 – 69	a man who runs into the bar, yelling that he just encountered a famous local ghost.
70 – 71	a strange creature briefly visible in the window.
72 – 73	a fire breaking out in the bar.
74 – 75	a section of the ceiling collapsing.
76 – 77	1d4 people in archaic outfits.
78 – 79	an obnoxious drunk stumbling into everyone and everything.
80 – 81	a man so drunk he falls off the bar stool unconscious.
82 – 83	a glowing ball of light that moves slowly across the room.
84 – 85	inexplicable banging or tapping sounds.
86 – 87	a muffled cry for help, but from no obvious source.
88 – 89	a bullet (or rock) crashing through a window.
90 – 91	a hitchhiker you’ve previously seen on the side of the road.
92 – 93	an unaccompanied child walking into the bar.
94 – 95	a woman running into the bar, screaming that she just escaped a kidnapper (or killer).
96 – 97	an African-American man with a guitar, who sits down and pours a dark powder on the ground around himself while he mutters something about keeping the “hellhounds” away.
98 – 99	a family who suddenly enters, seeking help for their broken-down automobile.
100	an automobile crashing into the bar!

Obviously out-of-place or annoying patrons will eventually be asked to leave by the Bartender.

Food and Drink

d6	The bar serves…
1	a unique cocktail made nowhere else.
2	a wide selection of beers, but only a small election of spirits.
3	a seemingly endless selection of alcohol.
4	especially stiff drinks.
5	watered-down drinks.
6	only local brands.

A normal 1960s or 1970s roadside bar serves 1d4 brands of beer, and 2d6 other liquors. In most bars, all the beer will be one of the big national brands. Modern-style craft beers are basically non-existent, but small regional and local brands do exist in some areas.

d6	The food is…
1	nothing but bar snacks. (Potato chips, peanuts, pretzels, popcorn, pickled eggs, etc.)
2	expensive, but high-quality.
3	both good and cheap.
4	greasy.
5	an unexpected, exotic cuisine.
6	disgustingly inedible.

Attractions and Amenities

d20, 1d10 times.	Other attractions and amenities include…
1	a dart board.
2	pool table(s).
3	1d6 strippers / burlesque dancers. (Mostly topless in the 1960s and 1970s, but full nude dancing exists in some places after 1969. Stripper poles aren’t introduced until 1972.)
4	a jukebox.
5	a stage for live performances.
6	a dance floor.
7	a television.
8	a pay phone.
9	a mechanical bull.
10	air hockey.
11	a foosball table.
12	a skee-ball machine.
13	various board games that can be played by patrons.
14	an electro-mechanical gun shooting game.
15	a pachinko machine.
16	pinball machine. (Or video game, after 1978.)
17	slot machine. (Or video poker, after 1979.)
18	1d4 bowling lanes.
19	a room for private parties.
20	lodgings.

There can be multiple examples of the same attraction or amenity.

d12	The bathroom is…
1 – 4	unremarkable.
5	the haunt of a local drug dealer.
6	disgustingly foul.
7	covered in graffiti.
8	surprisingly clean.
9	filled with a mysterious odor.
10	very cramped.
11	cavernously large.
12	apparently a popular spot for casual sexual encounters.

The Bar’s Secret

d100	The most shocking fact about this bar is…
1 – 15	only that the staff is paid “off the books”.
16 – 29	it’s Mob owned, but otherwise a regular business.
30 – 38	it serves underage patrons.
39 – 40	it has failed every health inspection, but somehow remains in business.
40 – 41	all the liquor is bootleg, but put into “legitimate” bottles.
42 – 43	it’s crawling with vermin.
44	the bartender is actually a Vampyre.
45	it is used as a hunting ground by the local Vampyres.
46	the bartender is actually a Werewolf.
47	it’s used as a hunting ground by the local Werewolves.
48 – 50	it’s haunted by the ghost of the first owner.
51 – 52	it’s haunted by the ghost of person murdered here.
53 – 54	it’s haunted by the ghost of a dog (or other pet).
55 – 56	it’s patronized by Demons and Devils.
57 – 58	it’s patronized by Angels.
59	it’s patronized by the Devil himself (or another major Infernal power). (d4: Satan is… 1 = looking to make a deal. 2 = on holiday from Hell, and just want to be left alone. 3 = drowning his sorrows from the loss of his latest love. 4 = expecting someone.)
60	it’s Death’s favorite hangout!
61	it’s used as a neutral meeting ground by the powers of Heaven and Hell.
62 – 63	the owner is a KGB agent.
64 – 66	it’s used for CIA mind-control experiments.
67	some of the drinks are actually potions that grant magical powers.
68 – 69	it’s a meeting place for Demon Hunters.
70	the local Fairy Folk meet here “after-hours”.
71 – 72	auctions of sex slaves are held here “after-hours”.
73 – 74	the basement is a way station for human trafficking.
75	the basement contains an entrance to the Underworld.
76	it’s built atop an Indian burial ground.
77	it’s actually a disguised space-ship, and the owner is an extraterrestrial.
79 – 80	many of the apparent patrons are actually ghosts.
81 – 82	its used as hunting ground for a homicidal maniac.
83 – 84	it’s a front for illegal gambling.
85 – 86	it’s a front for prostitution.
87 – 88	it’s a front for drug dealing.
89 – 90	it’s infested with vermin.
91 – 93	the meat served is actually roadkill.
94 – 95	the meat served is actually from animals not normally eaten by Americans.
96	the meat served is human flesh.
97 – 98	the small library and reading room in the back, stocked with classics and quality literature.
99 – 100	it is owned by a celebrity.

Hitchhikers of the Uncanny Highway – U.S. Route 28

10 Tuesday Mar 2020

Posted by Daniel James Hanley in Gothic Gaming, GROOVY Ghastly Affair, Historical Gaming, Random Tables, Uncanny Highway, Weird

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This is the third post in the series on U.S. Route 28, road of the lost and damned. Like the other random tables in the series, these are intended to reflect a mid-60s to mid-70s America where the all the urban legends are true – and the crazy preacher on the radio might just be right to believe Satan has taken over the P.T.A.!

The 60s and 70s were, of course, the Golden Age of hitchhiking in America, when almost every stretch of roadway would feature someone trying to thumb a ride. Naturally, U.S. Route 28 has its fair share of hitchhikers – not all of whom completely qualify as human beings!

d20	On the side of the road is what appears to be…
1 – 4	1d4 hippies (Flip coin for gender. Ages are d12+13.)
5 – 7	1d4 backpacking college student(s). (Flip coin for gender. Ages are d4+17.)
8 – 10	1d4 ordinary High School students (Flip coins for genders. Ages are d4+13.)
11	a biker next to a broken down motorcycle. (50% chance the encounter is with what appears to be a male biker, and either his “Old Lady” or one of his club’s “Mamas”. If the driver is a biker, there is a 25% chance the stranded biker is from a rival club. Bikers will almost always refuse to abandon their bikes, and usually only flag down drivers in pickup trucks or vans.)
12	a couple next to a broken down car.
13	a family next to a broken-down car.
14	a group of musicians next to a broken-down van.
15	a policeman next to his broken-down car.
16	a soldier.
17	a lone man.
18	a lone woman.
19	a man and a dog.
20	a woman and a dog.

d100	The apparent ethnic origin of the hitchhiker(s) is/are…
1 – 80	“White” American (d12: 1 – 5 = No distinct ethnicity. 6 – 7 = German-American. 8 – 9 = Irish-American. 10 = Italian-American. 11 = Polish-American. 12 = Jewish American [Jewish Americans of the 1960s and 70s were overwhelmingly Ashkenazi].)
81 – 94	African American (Black)
95	Hispanic or West Indian (d6: 1 – 2 = Mexican-American. 2 = Puerto Rican. 3 = Cuban. 4 = Brazilian or South American. 6 = Jamaican-American, or other black West Indian ethnicity.)
96	Asian American (d6: 1 = Filipino-American. 2 = Chinese-American. 3 = Japanese-American. 4 = Korean-American. 5 = Vietnamese-American or Southeast Asian. 6 = Indian-American or Pakistani-American.)
97	Middle-Eastern (d4: 1 = Lebanese-American. 2 = Armenian-American. 3 = Turkish-American. 4 = Palestinian-American.)
98	Native American (d10: 1 = Navaho. 2 = Cherokee. 3 = Apache. 4 = Sioux. 5 = Iroquois. 6 = Chocktaw. 7 = Chippewa. 8 = Cree. 9 = Blackfoot. 10 = Pueblo.)
99 – 100	Foreign. (d20: 1 = Canadian [25% chance to be French-Canadian]. 2 = English. 3 = Scottish. 5 – 6 = Irish. 7 = Australian. 8 – 11 = Continental European. 12 = Middle Eastern. 13 = Indian or Pakistani. 14 – 15 = East Asian. 16 = Pacific Islander. 17 = Sub-Saharan African. 18 = Mexican. 19 = Central American [other than Mexican]. 20 = South American.)

Naturally, the above table is weighted towards the demographics of the United States in the period from the mid 1960s to the mid 1970s.

d12	They want to be taken…
1 – 2	to the nearest motel.
3 – 4	to the nearest gas station / truck stop.
5	to the nearest eatery.
6	to the nearest intersection.
7	to the nearest town.
8	to the nearest city.
9	anywhere you’re going.
10	across the county line.
11	across the state line.
12	someplace inexplicable.

d12	In return for the ride, the driver will be offered…
1 – 4	only thanks.
5	their favorite songs.
6	sexual favors. (Roll again if a child is present.)
7	drugs.
8	money for gas.
9	the story (or stories) of the hitchhiker’s (or lives).
10	a strange trinket.
11	the good news of Jesus Christ.
12	the teachings of the hitchhiker’s Guru.

d20	Their actual intent is…
1 – 10	just to get where they say they are going.
11	recruitment into a cult. (10% chance the cult is murderous, or otherwise criminal in its behavior.)
12	robbery.
13	assault.
14	murder. (5% chance the hitchhiker is a Vampyre or Werewolf.)
15	to surreptitiously drug people as part of a CIA mind-control experiment.
16	to pass on their magical power.
17	to free themselves of a curse.
18	to make a human sacrifice to Satan (or some other power of evil).
19	to reveal a disturbing prophesy. (10% chance to be a “phantom hitchhiker” – or a group of phantom hitchhikers – who will disappear once they arrive at their stated destination.)
20	to conduct bizarre experiments on human beings, because they are actually a disguised extraterrestrial (or group of extraterrestrials).

d100	Notably, this hitchhiker…
1 – 4	is a natural blonde. (Or, has straightened hair, if African American.)
5 – 8	wears glasses.
9 – 10	is a natural redhead (Or, has an “afro”, if African American.)
11 – 12	is strikingly attractive.
13 – 14	is very muscular (or buxom). (Roll again if a child.)
15 – 16	has extremely long hair. (If a male policeman or soldier, they have a prominent mustache.)
17 – 18	is unusually pale for their apparent ethnicity.
19 – 20	is very unkempt.
21 – 22	looks younger than their stated age.
23 – 24	looks older than their stated age.
25 – 26	smells unusually good.
27 – 28	has a foul body odor.
29 – 30	has a smooth, velvety voice.
31 – 32	has a rough, gruff voice.
33 – 34	speaks crudely.
35 – 36	speaks eloquently.
37 – 38	is very rude (or brazen).
39 – 40	is extremely polite.
41 – 42	speaks pretentiously. (Or precociously, if a child.)
43 – 44	is seemingly overdressed for the weather.
45 – 46	is wearing a lot of jewelry.
47 – 48	is wearing a strange amulet or religious medal.
49 – 50	is heavily tattooed. (Note: it is rare for women not associated with bikers to have obvious tattoos in the 1960s and 70s.)
51 – 52	matches the description of a wanted criminal. (The person is wanted for: 1 = murder. 2 = bank robbery. 3 = sex offenses. 4 = kidnapping. Roll again if a child.)
53 – 54	is wearing a suit / formal attire.
55 – 56	looks exactly like someone famous. (5% chance they actually are that person)
57 – 58	appears to be very nervous.
59 – 60	is very standoffish.
61 – 62	has no concept of personal space.
63 – 64	avoids all questions about their past. (Roll again if they have offered to tell the story of their life in return for the ride!)
65 – 66	is wearing as little clothing as possible.
67 – 68	won’t look at you when they speak.
69 – 70	stares right into your eyes when they speak.
71 – 72	is wearing what looks like a Halloween costume. (If the hitchhiker is in uniform, they are wearing a Halloween mask.)
73 – 74	has horrible teeth.
75 – 76	is wearing clothing that seems a size too small.
77 – 78	is wearing very loose clothing.
79 – 80	is very fashionable.
81 – 82	is wearing a fashion (or a hairstyle) that seems at least a decade out of date.
83 – 84	claims to have had an encounter with a UFO.
85 – 86	is very bigoted.
87 – 88	is extraordinarily tolerant and liberal in their views.
89 – 90	is outspokenly in favor of the Vietnam War (Roll again if a Hippie.)
91 – 92	is outspokenly opposed to the Vietnam War.
93 – 94	constantly claims to see things no one else notices.
95	has two different color eyes.
96	is on crutches
97	has only one eye.
98	is missing a hand.
99	is missing an arm.
100	is completely bald. (90% likely to be wearing a wig.)

Billboards and Eateries of the Uncanny Highway – U.S. Route 28

03 Tuesday Mar 2020

Posted by Daniel James Hanley in Gothic Gaming, GROOVY Ghastly Affair, Historical Gaming, Random Tables, Uncanny Highway, Weird

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Welcome back to the series on the “Uncanny Highway”. It’s good to be back here posting after such a long hiatus! So, without further ado, here’s some generators for the tasteless billboards and strange eateries that line that corridor of Hell on Earth known as U.S. Route 28!

BILLBOARDS OF THE UNCANNY HIGHWAY

d20	The Billboard appears to advertise a local…
1 – 2	Eatery.
3 – 4	Bar.
5 – 6	Amusement or Theme Park.
7 – 8	Truck Stop. (With gas, a weigh station, showers, and a restaurant.)
9 – 10	Motel.
11	Political Candidate.
12	Gas Station.
13	Souvenir Shop.
14	Monument.
15	Roadside Museum.
16	Trailer Park.
17	Drive-In Theater.
18	Car Dealership.
19	Church.
20	“Mystery Spot”.

d12	The main image on the Billboard depicts…
1 – 2	the proprietor of the establishment, (Alternately, the Political Candidate, or pastor of the advertised church.)
3 – 4	a smiling family,
5	a smiling face,
6 – 7	an image of the main product offered, (A hamburger, beer, cross, etc.)
8	a square-jawed man standing tall, (25% chance the man is wearing a cowboy hat.)
9	an anthropomorphic animal mascot,
10	a scantily-clad woman, (Roll again is the Billboard is for a Church. If this result is rolled again, then the Church is, in fact, advertising itself with a scantily-clad woman!)
11	a bald eagle,
12	Jesus holding an object associated with the sign’s subject, (A taco, a souvenir, a rifle, etc.)

d20	…and…
1 – 4	the exterior of the establishment, (Or, the image of the Statehouse or County Courthouse, for a Political Candidate)
5 – 8	a rippling American flag,
9 – 10	stars,
11 – 12	spotlights,
13 – 14	fireworks,
15	a circle of people holding hands,
16	an automobile (or several automobiles),
17	a tree, (50% chance of a cactus instead, if road runs through a desert.)
18	flowers,
19	flying birds,
20	a happy dog,

d20	…against…
1 – 3	a plain white background.
4 – 7	an American flag design.
8 – 9	a local landscape.
10 – 11	a blue sky.
12 – 14	a field of solid color.
15 – 17	a field of gradient color.
18	a checkerboard pattern.
19	a swirly, “psychedelic” design.
20	a field of polka dots.

d6	Besides any directions, the text of the advertisement consist of…
1	a few simple words,
2	a single word,
3	a single, carefully considered slogan,
4	a few disconnected phrases,
5	a few complete sentences,
6	too many words to read while driving past,

d6	…written…
1	in the empty spaces of the design.
2	across the design, almost obscuring it.
3	in white letters, within black bars on the top and bottom of the sign.
4	in “extruded” text meant to look like it is projecting from the sign.
5	within angular geometric shapes.
6	within curvilinear, organic shapes.

d6	The diction used is…
1	unctuous.
2	saccharine.
3	bold and confident.
4	zany.
5	vaguely threatening.
6	dry and matter-of-fact.

d100	Notably, …
1 – 10	the sign is very old and faded.
11 – 20	the sign appears to be quite new.
21 – 30	the colors clash horribly.
31 – 40	the quality of the artwork is shockingly good.
41 – 50	the quality of the artwork is very low.
51 – 55	the sign is defaced with Satanic graffiti.
56 – 60	teenagers have drawn several arrow-pierced hearts on it, along with their initials.
61 – 64	someone has been shooting at the sign.
65 – 68	someone has crudely drawn male genitalia on the sign.
69 – 70	the sign is an unusual shape.
71 – 72	the sign is a pasted sheet that is now peeling away, revealing another image underneath.
73 – 74	someone has left flowers at the the base of the sign. (25% chance each of a teddy bear, photograph, or candle also being present.)
75 – 76	someone has been shooting at the sign.
77 – 78	there is blood spattered on the sign.
79 – 80	someone has written the names of their favorite musical artists on the sign.
81 – 82	someone has written “Murderers” (or “Thieves”) on the sign.
83 – 84	someone has written cabalistic formulas on the sign.
85 – 86	someone has written “Die, Commies!” on the sign.
87 – 88	there are numerous dead birds at the base of the sign.
89 – 90	there is a dead deer at the base of the sign.
91 – 92	someone appears to be camped out underneath the sign.
93 – 94	there is an abandoned car underneath the sign.
95 – 96	there is an abandoned motorcycle underneath the sign.
97 – 98	the address given is impossible. (The indicated town doesn’t exist, the street number is too high to be real, etc.)
99 – 100	no address or directions are given.

ROADSIDE EATERIES OF THE UNCANNY HIGHWAY

d100	The roadside sign outside the eatery is…
1 – 15	unexceptional.
16 – 30	neon.
31 – 36	nothing but a painted A-frame sign.
37 – 42	three-sided.
43 – 48	painted on a rotating drum.
49 – 54	enclosed by a frame of white light bulbs.
55 – 60	enclosed by a frame of colored light bulbs.
61 – 62	apparently missing (there is an empty pole where it should be attached)
63 – 64	completely illegible.
65 – 66	spotlit 24 hours a day.
67 – 68	painted in “psychedelic” style, with organically-shaped letters and bright colors.
69 – 70	held by a giant chicken.
71 – 72	painted across a giant hamburger atop a pole.
73 – 74	held by a giant, anthropomorphic hamburger.
75 – 76	painted across a giant hotdog on a pole.
77 – 78	held by a giant anthropomorphic hotdog.
79 – 81	painted across a giant milkshake.
81 – 82	painted across a giant fish atop a pole.
83 – 84	held by an anthropomorphic fish.
85 – 86	held by a giant pig in a chef’s outfit.
87 – 88	on a board underneath an anthropomorphic pig, carving itself into chops.
89 – 90	painted across a giant, anthropomorphic ear of corn.
91 – 92	painted vertically on the side of a rocket.
93 – 94	designed to resemble a medieval coat-of-arms.
95 – 96	held by a giant woman. (d4: 1 = Bikini-clad. 2 = Ethnic outfit. 3 = Cowgirl. 4 = Maid)
97 – 98	held by a giant cowboy.
99 – 100	held by a stereotypical Native American with a feathered headdress.

Note: If the sign seems wholly inappropriate for the establishment, either roll again, or assume that the current eatery simply re-purposed the sign from the restaurant that occupied the building previously.

d100	The exterior of the building is…
1 – 40	perfectly ordinary.
41 – 45	just an old house (or barn) converted into a restaurant.
46 – 50	a sleek Art-Deco design of chrome and glass.
51 – 55	a Space-Age, “Googie” design.
56 – 60	a boxy, brick structure that may once have been a warehouse.
61 – 65	a giant windmill
66 – 70	a sailing ship (complete with masts),
71 – 74	an old railway car.
75 – 76	a converted bus.
77 – 78	a log cabin.
79 – 80	a faux castle.
81 – 82	a Chinese pagoda.
83 – 84	a giant tee-pee.
85 – 86	a giant egg.
87 – 89	a giant melon.
90 – 91	a giant apple.
92 – 93	a head wearing a cowboy hat. (Entrance is through the open mouth.)
94 – 95	a giant hamburger.
96 – 96	a giant, upright ear of corn.
97 – 98	a train car.
99 – 100	an Egyptian pyramid.

Note: As with the sign, if the shape of the building seems wholly inappropriate for the establishment, either roll again, or assume that the eatery is located inside a building actually created for a completely different type of restaurant.

d6	The condition of the building is…
1	excellent.
2	generally good.
3	poor due to neglect.
4	poor due to obvious vandalism.
5	badly weathered.
6	mostly good, but there are bullet holes in the side.

d10	The parking lot is…
1	very small, but only partially filled.
2	very small, and completely filled.
3	moderately sized, and largely empty.
4	moderately sized, and half empty.
5	moderately sized, but mostly filled.
6	large, and largely empty.
7	large, and half-filled.
8 – 9	large, because this is a drive-in restaurant. (Once a customer parks, waitstaff will appear in 1d6 minutes. 50% likely the waitstaff is on roller-skates.)
10	large, half-filled, and evidently a popular place for teenagers to congregate. (There are 2d4 apparently ordinary teenagers loitering about one or two cars.)

d10	The interior is…
1 – 3	wood paneling,
4 – 5	painted wood paneling,
6	bare brick,
7	faux stone,
8 – 9	wallpapered.,
10 – 11	filled with mementos of local community members,
12	plastered with newspapers,

d8	…and it is..
1 – 3	clean, well-maintained, and brightly-lit.
4 – 5	clean and well-maintained, but dimly-lit.
6	apparently clean, but there is a strange odor.
7	dingy and neglected.
8	filthy and obviously vermin-infested.

d12	The food served is primarily…
1 – 2	local-style home-cooking.
3 – 4	battered and deep-fried.
5 – 6	hamburgers and hot dogs.
7	barbeque.
8	Soul Food.
9	a challenging local specialty. (Rocky Mountain Oysters, Scrapple, Head Cheese, etc.)
10	pizzeria fare.
11	Chinese-American.
12	Tex-Mex.

d10	The staff is…
1	complete nondescript – in fact, it’s hard to remember what they even look like!
2	a motley crew, no two of whom resemble each other at all.
3	oddly similar in appearance.
4	wearing archaic uniforms.
5	all unusually old.
6	all unusually young.
7	all of a single ethnic background (other than white American).
8	unusually pale and sickly-looking.
9	strangely lethargic.
10	frighteningly energetic.

d20	The bathroom is…
1 – 3	clean and bright.
4 – 5	clean, but drab.
6 – 7	dreary.
8	disgustingly foul, and looks like it is seldom cleaned.
9 – 10	very dimly-lit.
11	covered in graffiti.
12 – 13	decorated in a nautical theme.
14	covered in newspapers.
15	in the middle of a renovation.
16	oddly modern and fashionable for a roadside establishment.
17 – 18	a mess, from what looks like a recent fight or struggle.
19	spattered with fresh blood.
20	literally a gateway to Hell.

d100	The other patrons of the eatery include…
1 – 8	an average family. (A father, a mother, and 1d4 children. 25% chance the children are running around, annoying other patrons.)
9 – 12	an obviously abusive man and his terrified family.
13 – 16	a uniformed policeman.
17 – 20	2 men in suits eating together. (50% chance to be homicide detectives working a case)
21 – 24	1d12 biker(s).
25 – 28	1d4 sportspeople. (Hunter(s), fisher(s), hiker(s), mountain climber(s), etc.)
29 – 32	1d4 nun(s).
33 – 36	1d4 workmen eating together.
37 – 40	a male trucker eating alone.
41 – 44	a male trucker eating with a woman (d100: 1 – 50 = woman is the trucker’s wife or girlfriend. 51 – 75: woman is a prostitute. 76 – 100: woman is a hitchhiker.)
45 – 48	a group of 2d4 religious fanatics.
49 – 52	1d6 hippies. (Or other counter-cultural types.)
53 – 56	a nondescript man eating alone. (2% chance he is a serial killer. 25% chance he is a traveling salesman. He may be a serial-killer traveling salesman.)
57 – 60	a nondescript woman eating alone. (10% chance she is pregnant. 1% chance she is a serial killer. She may be a pregnant serial-killer.)
61 – 64	a group of 1d4+1 ordinary teenagers. (25% likely to be hitchhiking.)
65 – 68	a group of 1d4+1 middle-aged women.
69 – 72	A bruised woman, not eating anything. (d6 to determine who assaulted her: 1 = her husband. 2 = her pimp. 3 = a random person. 4 = a rogue highway patrolman. 5 = a supernatural creature. 6 = nobody – she was in an accident.)
73 – 76	a well-dressed man and woman. (10% chance they are about to rob the place. 1% chance they are a serial-killing couple.)
77 – 80	a shabbily dressed man and woman. (5% chance they are about to rob the place. 1% chance they are a serial-killing couple.)
81 – 84	a dangerous-looking man who stares at the other patrons. (2% chance he is a serial killer. 10% chance he is an escaped lunatic.)
85 – 88	an obviously drunk man.
89 – 92	an obvious pimp with 1d4 prostitutes. (Prostitutes are 12+d20 years old.)
93 – 96	a runaway teenage girl. (75% likely to be looking for a ride. 25% chance she is pregnant.)
97 – 100	a runaway teenage boy. (75% likely to be looking for a ride.)

Roll 1d4 times if the parking lot is small, 1d8 times if the parking lot is moderately sized, and 2d12 times if the parking lot is large.

d100	The most shocking fact about the place is…
1 – 10	only that the wait staff are paid “off the books”.
11 – 16	the food is actually better than any fancy restaurant.
17 – 18	the food is vile, and it is a wonder how it stays in business.
19 – 20	it is haunted by the ghost of its former owner.
21 – 22	it is haunted by the ghost of a teenage girl who died on her prom night.
23 – 24	it is haunted by the ghost of a former employee.
25 – 26	it is haunted by the ghosts of the animals served there!
27 – 30	the proprietor seems to be barely out of High School.
31 – 33	it is infested with vermin.
34 – 36	the owner serves old food that is close to spoiling.
37 – 40	the cook was actually once the personal chef of someone famous.
41 – 43	a well-known celebrity often dines here incognito.
44 – 46	it was once the scene of a mass-murder.
47 – 50	it is built directly atop a Native American burial ground.
51 – 53	it has failed every health inspection, and survives through the bribery of county officials.
54 – 56	it is a front for drug dealing.
57 – 60	it is a front for prostitution.
61 – 63	it is a front for contract murder.
64 – 66	it is simply a money laundering operation for its owners.
67 – 70	murder victims are buried under the floor.
71 – 73	the food of some patrons is drugged, so they can be handed over to an international human trafficking network.
74 – 76	the food of some patrons is drugged so their kidneys can be harvested.
77 – 79	the owners are members of a satanic cult.
80 – 83	it is used as meeting place by violent racists.
84 – 86	it is used as meeting place by Soviet agents.
87 – 91	it is part of a CIA mind-control experiment.
90 – 92	it is actually the resting place of a Vampyre (or pack of Vampyres).
93 – 95	the wait staff are actually trafficked people working against their will.
96 – 98	the meat served is not from the animals claimed – but at least its not human!
99	it serves human flesh to everyone.
100	there is a secret back room / underground chamber where human flesh is served to a select clientele.

Table 1: Reason to Stop at a Trailer Park

Table 2: Trailer Park Name

Table 3: Size of the Park

Table 4: Trailer Park Enclosure

Table 5: Trailer Park Amenities

Table 6: Trailer And Mobile Home Types

Table 7: Items Outside a Trailer Park Home

Table 8: The Trailer Park Manager

Table 9: Notable Trailer Park Residents

Table 10: Average Residents of a Trailer Park

Table 11: Community Activities in a Trailer Park

Table 12: Criminal Activity in a Trailer Park

Table 13: Dark Secret of the Trailer Park

Table 14: Overnight Events in a Trailer Park

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Motel Architecture

Motel Layout

Motel Size

Motel Vacancy

Front Desk Clerk

Motel Room Cost

Motel Amenities

Motel Room Decor

Notable Feature of a Motel Room

Motel Room Bible

Motel Vending Machines

Motel Guests

TV Stations

Motel Events

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Truck Stop Theme

The Parking Lot

Truck Cargoes

Gas & Diesel Pumps

Mechanic

Carwashing

Restaurant

The Lounge

Lounge, Restaurant, and Shop Encounters

Bathrooms

Bathroom Patrons

Showers

Bunks

Laundry

Vending Machines

Shop Items

Drugs

“Lot Lizards”

Face of a Female (or Cross-Dressed) Prostitute

Clothing of a Female (or Cross-Dressed) Prostitute

“Lot Lizard” Hopes and Dreams

Pimps

Rumors and Gossip

Truck Stop Events

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(d12, d6) The obviously tipsy woman says:

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(d12, d6) The obviously tipsy man says:

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Initial Impression of the Bar

Inside the Bar

People and Events

Food and Drink

Attractions and Amenities

The Bar’s Secret

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BILLBOARDS OF THE UNCANNY HIGHWAY

ROADSIDE EATERIES OF THE UNCANNY HIGHWAY

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