ugh: _riotnotdiet — LiveJournal

ugh

having body issues this week. I've eaten so much junk in the past few days at least i think so i'm sure i'v gained a few. I feel so fat. Past day or so i've had ice cream, waffle cone and pizza... a Sample of what i ate as of today: bowl of cereal (no milk), green tea, an apple, some pizza crust from a slice of pizza, two homeade waffle cones, piece of cheese pizza, about a scoop of strawberry ice cream, bit of soft pretzel, an apple and wendy's frescata roasted turkey and basil pesto sandwich. I feel so gross and guilt of eating is setting in to the point i want to purge (which i have never done nor want to try) or just punish myself and not eat anything tomorrow. I'm working in the food services at my local zoo.. which probably bad for a anorexic or anyone with a eating disorder to be working with food. And yeah i can tell its taking a toll. we are allowed to eat whatever pizza, ice cream, or other foods that are served to us, waffle cones, ice cream too. We call it "dead" food. left overs basically. And it seems like whenever i round food i have to eat it, even if i don't like the food. Like i don't really like pizza but i ate it anyway. Or fast food but i got some tonight. I love my job to death but it Seems my will power has gone down and I HATE IT! What should i do? also i can't exercise.. so that makes things tough.

ugh

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