It's snowing this morning.

Snow in the Lowcountry -- it's a rare, wonderful sight. Nothing sticking, no accumulation, but it's snowing nonetheless. Big, thick drops of snow blowing in the wind, and it's the weirdest, most awesome thing ever. When I walked the dingo this morning, we walked through the marsh while the wind blew snow all around the dunes. The local news keeps showing crazy aerial footage of snow blowing over the old, antebellum mansions in downtown Charleston, rustling through the palm trees.

I never see snow. I can tell you exactly how many times I've experienced actual snow: the blizzard in 1989 when Charleston got 7" of snow (yes, I know, not much of a blizzard but it's still a record for the city), the snowstorm that hit the Washington, D.C. area back in, like, the early 1990's (which was awesome, because we were snowed in and couldn't get back home and I got excused absences from school), 2" in winter of 1999, and the snow on the ground when I was at annakovsky's New Year's Eve 2004. Oh, and once when I was little and we visited my grandmother in Fort Wayne. That's it, folks.

So, yes, whenever there's a flurry or a little patch of white, I get excited. It's like magic.

Good morning. :)

ETA: HA! Even better morning! Work is cancelled; I am crawling back into bed. JOY. :)

Yes, I spent all weekend watching Saved by the Bell and cleaning house and working. My schedule's kind of wacky lately and I've been working odd, late hours, so I'm gonna post when I can. But this isn't about life or SBTB, because God, I fucking love Heroes, and I have to babble about last night's episode.

( Spoilers! Spoilers for Heroes!Collapse )

Will have thoughts on Friday's BSG soon. All I'll say is this: Darkest. Season. Ever. And I fucking love it.

EEEEEEE!!! My birthday present from my father arrived today via Amazon, and it is the SHIZNIT, for now I am the proud owner of all five seasons of Saved by the Bell on DVD! FUCK YEAH! And the first season of The College Years are on their way tomorrow! Ohhhhh, sweet nostalgia. They're all so young! And the clothes! And the uber-cheesy dialogue! And the HAIR!

LET THE MARATHON BEGIN.

*is in geek heaven*

ETA: YES! First sighting of Zack's giant cell phone! SCORE.

Am posting from crackberry while waiting for brother to get out of class. Have yummy pumpkin frap and good book, but still bored off ass.

So. Anyone else wanna talk about last night's ANTM? Also, am I alone in inexplicable love of Melrose?

Dear Donald Rumsfeld:

PWNED.

Love,
The American Voters

MMMMMMM GOOD BIRTHDAY :)

The best way to celebrate your birthday? SLOTH AND GLUTTONY. I had McDonald's for breakfast (shuddap, those cinnamon rolls are the SHIT), then went on a shopping spree at Old Navy, then came home and napped. Only now, I'm a bit confused -- I think I dreamt that there was some weird shit in my cinnamon rolls, but I can't be sure if that was a dream or not, and so I may have consumed tainted cinnamon rolls. But then again, they're from McDonald's, so they were pretty much tainted to begin with. BUT I CARE NOT, for it is my birthday and I am allowed to eat crazy shit. Yay!

I also ... okay, I have to fess up, y'all. Because I have mocked those who wear them in the past, and I probably will continue to mock them, but ... I bought a pair of faux-Uggs from Old Navy. Shut up! You don't understand! They're all warm and fuzzy and they feel like walking on clouds and I will never never NEVER wear them outside the house (except, y'know, when walking the dog late at night when I'm in my pajamas). Do not judge me! I am the birthday queen and if I want to wear fake Uggs, then that is what I will do!

There's so much I have to talk about, y'all. Like how I've totally fallen head-over-heels in love with Battlestar Galactica and all its gray morality and hard choices and the eternal sorrow that is Saul Tigh. Or how I think the best new show on TV this year is Heroes, with the close runner-up being Ugly Betty. Or how I watched the first couple of episodes of Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip before the smugness outweighed the total gay love between Matt Perry and Bradley Whitford.

Or my secret shame ... oh God ... I can't even say it, but ... I may have really fallen in love with the awesome evil that is America's Next Top Model HA! You still can't judge me because it's my birthday! HAHAHA!

And I've been READING. Reading HARDCORE, like, everything I can get my hands on. And I'm going to start reviewing the big old stack of books I have, as well as the television I've been loving, and the movies that rock my world, and how I'm totally pissed at the Democrats and now consider myself an Independent, because both political parties fucking suck. Well, they do. Also? I've been writing again recently. Shhhhhhh. I'd talk about it more, but I don't wanna jinx it. *g*

I'll end this post by pimping out Grant-Lee Phillips' new album, nineteeneighties, because it's so beautiful it makes my heart hurt. Covers rule.

Rumors of my demise have been greatly exaggerated.

So, yeah. It's been a while, folks. I could get into it, but frankly, that's what I have a therapist for (yay for therapy!). So let's just say that I had a big old mess in my head and needed to take some time away from the internet to sort it out. And that's what I'm doing. Sorting. Filing. Organizing. Cleaning out the brain. And I've come a loooooong way, and I've still got miles to go, but hey -- don't we all?

Today is my twenty-fifth birthday. I am now officially a quarter of a century old, but that's not what hit me this morning (age ain't nothing but a number, and as long as I still get carded for cigarettes, I'm a happy camper *g*). No, what occurred to me is this: I have spent ten years in fandom. And ... well ... I've missed it. I've missed my online friends. I've missed giddily dissecting television shows and pop culture and good books and great movies and just having wild, crazy, nerdy conversations.

Which is why I'm not going to get into any of the shit that's kept me offline for the last few months. I just wanna have fun, and dammit, it's my birthday, so that's what I plan on doing.

So come on, bitches. Let's celebrate. Oh, and because it's been a loooooooooong time ...

*licks and gropes absolutely everyone in the universe*

Ahhhhhhhh. Now I feel better. :)

ETA: Oh, shame on me for letting my webspace/extra pics expire! This must be rectified ASAP. I only have ONE Thewlis icon, people. ONE. That is just not right.

ETA2: And I just fixed my icon problem. YAY. Also? Fuck, I love y'all. That's all. Just ... <3333 :)

If anyone bothers me today at work, I am TOTALLY going to sic Bobblehead!Dwight on them all. After all, he's a skilled fighter, and he can bore people to death with minutae about The Lord of the Rings and Star Wars and shit. GO DWIGHT GO! God, I love Rainn Wilson. <333

GOOD NEWS: I do not have to sit in my office this week, which is AWESOME, because now I'm not right next door to the construction. YAY! I might survive this week without a migraine! That would be nice, because you bet your ass I went home with another headache last night. And that's uber-annoying, because I wanted to watch the latest episode of The 4400 last night (shut up, I finally got into the show last weekend, and OMG it is made of awesome). But now I am in Momboss's office, and the noise is MUCH BETTER. :)

BAD NEWS: Momboss is in Nashville this week, taking a Social Security exam. This is why I get to sit in her office this week. However, this also means that I have to deal with all the crazies, and because the Social Security Administration likes to send out their denial letters in batches, everyone is calling and complaining. I also have a HUGE stack of appeals to get through, but I am MIGHTY and STRONG and can handle ANYTHING.

GOOD NEWS: I took half a Valium this morning after it took me almost two hours before I could finally get up from my desk and GET MY COFFEE. So now I'm a bit more mellow than I was, oh, thirty minutes ago, when I wanted to stab my eyes out with a pair of scissors.

BAD NEWS: The last episode of Doctor Who? Meh. Not really BAD, but not really good, either, though I think that has something to do with the fact that I'd like to see David Tennant in EVERY SINGLE FRAME of an episode. Well, I would. Shut up.

GOOD NEWS: I am totally going to Marie Leveau's for lunch today. hlynna tipped me off to this place, and it is the best damn restaurant ever. Creole/Cajun food, served to perfection, and in an atmosphere that's warm and colorful and relaxed. Plus, they play awesome music: last time I was in there, I heard Aimee Mann, Zero 7, and a wicked cover of "Monday, Monday" by Matthew Sweet and Susannah Hoffs. They even serve beignets for breakfast, though they're nowhere NEAR as good as the ones you can get at Cafe du Monde in New Orleans. And you know what? That makes me happy, in a silly way, because it's like some things truly are sacred. :)

ALL RIGHT. THAT'S IT. I'VE HAD IT.

I spent all fucking weekend with one of the worst migraine headaches I've ever had, all because of the goddamn drilling they did on Friday. Seriously. One of the worst migraines ever. And now, I come back to work, finally feeling better, and what do I get? EVEN MORE FUCKING DRILLING. And it is MONDAY MORNING, when I'm assaulted by phone calls and I can't even concentrate on my work or DO half of my work (like calling clients to get updated information) because they are THAT FUCKING LOUD.

So, that's it. I've had it. I am going next door, and I am going to extend my hand to the foreman with a smile and then say, "Hi, I'm anniesj, and I'm the one who's gone home with a headache almost every day for the last, oh, what is it now, SEVEN MONTHS, because of you. You see that wall right there? The one you're drilling into? Yeah, that's where my desk is. That's where I get to sit, every day, and listen to you people drill and saw and hammer.

"Oh yes, my friend, I hear everything. I hear it when your workers swear into their cell phones. I hear it when that one construction worker you have burps so loud that it echoes. And oh, believe me, I hear it whenever one of you bitches because someone fucked something up, because that's how I know that because of your incompetence, I'm going to go home with a screaming headache.

"So listen up, buddy, because I'm going to tell you something: I don't care if you're on a deadline. We've called over to you people at least a dozen times and asked you, very politely, I might add, to schedule your noisy work around our business hours. And now I'm here to tell you, without the niceties, that every time you people make a horrible noise that disrupts my work, I am going to kick the fuck out of my wall so that you know it. And if you're not scared of me just because I look like some scrawny little white chick you can just ignore, let me tell you something: this scrawny little white chick has an FBI file. I'll let you guess why. Have a fabulous day, buttweasels."

Of course, I'm not going to end up saying any of this. I'll end up sitting here at my desk all day, trying to work through what sounds like a steel Armageddon (are they building an army of Cybermen over there? I would not put it past them), while sekkritly hating them all and wishing their heads would explode.

But I am gonna start kicking the wall every time they annoy me. SO THERE.

note to self: annie, you are such a pussy.

( Cut for obligatory reaction to That Big Doctor Who Spoiler that everyone on my friendslist is talking about; don't click here if you don't want to know.Collapse )

And that's all I really have to say about that. :)

I'll end up spamming in a minute, probably, to make a proper post, but I don't want to get spoilers mixed up in other discussion and accidentally spoil someone. You know the drill.

PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT: Tonight, on Jay Leno, we have the best cagematch EVER: Ann Coulter vs. George Carlin. I pretty much want to have sex with whoever booked those two on the same night, because you KNOW there's going to be some shit going down, and it's going to be awesome. I bet that if you watch closely enough, you'll actually be able to see Jay Leno's testicles retreat into his body as these two go after each other. Personally, I cannot wait. (HUGE thanks to cavalaxis, apocalypsos, CNN, and the entire internet in general for highlighting this.)

Also, thanks to luna_k for linking to something truly, truly awesome: Julie Banderas of Fox News goes totally ballistic on the horrible wife of horrible Jim Phelps. Dude, when someone from FOX NEWS is telling you that you've crossed the line when it comes to gay-bashing, then it's time to stop the crazy machine, because you've truly gone off the deep end. WOW.

I still love this icon. SEAN CONNERY/ALEX TREBEK FOREVER. :)

I am on a desert island.

A beautiful, pristine, barely-inhabited island. I can hear nothing but the gentle lapping of the waves. The cawing of seagulls. The soft clink of ice hitting the glass as the naked men at the tiki bar make me another margarita with one of those little umbrellas in it. Oh, yes. I am on a desert island.

And oh, look at that, isn't that nice, Anderson Cooper's showed up wearing his sexy CNN windbreaker, all storm-disheveled and thirsty for hot sex with me and my shipwrecked crew. Why, yes, Anderson, please feel free to make out with David Tennant while he recovers from our last mind-bending fuck session. Don't worry about keeping your voices down. It's all good, because David Thewlis is right here, murmuring, "Would you like another massage?" in that hot Northern accent. Of course, David. You know what your hands do to me. You're so nice.

Everything's so nice on this desert island. So very, very nice. Nothing but the waves, the liquor, and an endless supply of hot men. Nothing but the--

*shriek ring i-demand-answers-you-can't-possibly-give-me drill hammer saw fax fax fax i hate the world omg die die die*

...

I am on a desert island ...

Well, damn. Alberto packed more of a punch than we expected here in Charleston, methinks. Lost power at my apartment sometime around 8:00 last night, after one of the big oak trees in our complex took a tumble. Yikes. Naturally, this meant that I fell asleep at, oh, 8:15, because boredom + rain - electricity = sleeeeeep. Also, a tornado touched down in downtown Charleston yesterday at the Medical University hospital, breaking out cop car windows and twisting the metal scaffolding in the parking garage. WHOA. It's so weird to think of a fucking tornado in downtown Charleston. It's just ... incongruous, somehow. I don't know.

I am supergroggy today. My mind is all hazy and my eyes keep clouding over as I try to work. That is majorly annoying.

In the news, the Government Accountability Office's audit of FEMA has revealed that emergency debit cards handed out post-Hurricane Katrina have generated somewhere in the range of $1 billion in fraudulent purchases. Some of the items purchased with FEMA debit cards include: a $200 bottle of champagne from Hooters; $300 worth of "Girls Gone Wild" videotapes; $1000 in divorce attorney's fees; $600 spent in a strip club; and $400 spent on "adult erotica products." And to all this, I say: "BWAHAHAHA *WEEP*." Seriously. The list of random shit bought with the FEMA debit cards is totally hilarious. But it's also extremely sucky that there are so many storm victims out there who desperately needed help (and still do), while FEMA's disorganization allowed people to take advantage of their nonexistent system. GOOD JOB, FEMA. *slow clapping*

And yeah, so President Asshat visited Iraq yesterday, but it really doesn't deserve a whole lot of commentary because it was just the same old bullshit again, as per usual. Public relations, blah blah blah bushcakes. I care not.

Now my brain is waking up, and my brain is NOT HAPPY about it. This probably has something to do with all the fucking construction noise next door and the fact that one client keeps trying to fax something to our main phone number, even though I gave him our fax number, and I can't get ahold of him at home to tell him to stop faxing to the main line. So instead, I get a shrill BEEEEEP in my ears every time I answer the phone, and it makes me see red.

But other than that, life is good, even if I do kinda want to smack Al Gore in the face for linking Katrina to global warming, because that's such a pet peeve of mine and I will not believe that the heightened hurricane activity has a goddamn thing to do with global warming until Max Mayfield, Hurricane Guru Supreme, says so. Don't get me started with the global warming rant, people. It gets ugly and I end up sounding like a conservative, which so isn't true, because I *do* believe in global warming, I really do; I just don't think that anyone can point to the last couple of hurricane seasons and say "HA! PROOF! PROOF THAT GLOBAL WARMING EXISTS!" See? You really don't want to get me started on that. I get longwinded and pissy.

Hey, did you know that there's a machine that sounds EXACTLY like nails running down a chalkboard, only magnified so that you can feel it IN YOUR FUCKING SOUL? I sure wish I didn't know that. I could've lived without ever finding that out.

*feels toes curl from the excruciating pain, omg, i hate those guys so much*

Wow. I'm talky lately. :)

*whine* I don't wanna be at work today. My head is just throbbing, and I want to go home and crawl under the bedcovers and sleep. Besides, thanks to Alberto, it's all dark and swampy outside, and it's going to rain like hell in a few hours. You'd think that if your city was under a tropical storm warning, you'd get the day off work, but nooooooo, we all have to be troopers about it. BOO TO THAT. And no, I don't care that we don't even have a stiff breeze yet. Tropical storm warning = day off work. End of story. *pout*

Actually, the rain's really starting to kick up in Charleston now. I drove through a nasty downpour on my way home for lunch, and ended up arriving at my apartment door soaked to the bone. On the plus side, since we don't have any clients coming in this afternoon, I get to wear my comfy track pants to work now. YAY.

Back to Alberto, though, which has officially made landfall now, according to the NHC. I saw some hilarious footage on CNN while eating lunch of some awesome idiot affiliate reporter broadcasting while standing in waist-deep water. The anchor started off by telling him that Max Mayfield, director of the National Hurricane Center, said he really shouldn't be doing that for fear of getting electrocuted. BWAHAHA! God, how I wish I'd seen Mayfield say that. "And by the way, Random!Female!Anchor, could you please tell that moron out there that if he stands in the storm surge like that, he's going to get his ass fried by downed power lines? KTHXBYE." Hilarious. Also? I <333 Max Mayfield so much. He is the Hurricane Guru in my opinion, and his word is gold.

Dammit. I'm thirsty and I want a Coke, but I don't want to walk all the way upstairs to the vending machines to get one. I guess I only have one option here: ULTIMATE CAGE MATCH OF LAZINESS VS. THIRST!!! Live, on Pay Per View. Bitches.

YES!!! WE HAVE ACHIEVED ROB MARCIANO AND HIGH WINDS!!!

*does the Carlton dance for Hot!Wet!Rob and his awesome hotness and the fury of nature*

God, I am such a weather geek. GEEK WITH ME, MINIONS.

Okay, I know Alberto's "just a tropical storm" (because really, honestly, is there ANY such thing as "just a tropical storm"? no, there isn't), but dammit, can't we get some constant coverage from CNN on this? Or am I just looking for anything, GODDAMN ANYTHING, that might preempt Larry King?

That reminds me -- Larry King was at San Quentin prison last week. I watched about five minutes of him talking with convicted murderers, but none of them took a shiv out of their asses and stabbed him, so I was disappointed and changed the channel. :(

BTW, since when is "Ann Coulter is a soulless cunt" news? Because I think we've all known that for quite some time now. shhhh, media outlets. just ignore her. never pay attention to crazy. ignore the crazy, and it will go away. i promise.

SIGH. Back to putting the television on MUTE and listening to Laura Veirs' "Fire Snakes" on repeat while writing porn. But I know that Rob Marciano is out there in Florida, dammit, and I want live footage of him being wet and sexy, not Larry "Seriously, Why Am I Not Dead Yet?" King.

Hurricane warnings have been posted for parts of the west coast of Florida; Tropical Storm Alberto has maximum sustained winds of 70mph.

Okay, first of all, WHOA, because when I fell asleep last night at 5:00, this fucker still had winds around 45mph, and it looked pretty poorly organized. This just goes to show you how little we really know about the weather, and it totally sums up exactly why I'm so fascinated with these storms -- because we'll never know, not ever, exactly how hurricanes form or what they are going to do. Incredible. Needless to say, I'm watching this one like a hawk. If you're in the path of the storm, get your shit together now, because this could be a minimal hurricane by the time it makes landfall. Alberto seems like a rainmaker, too (which is good for South Carolina at least, because we sure could use the rain when Alberto passes over us as a tropical depression in a few days), so be prepared for flooding.

In other news, I AM ALL CAUGHT UP WITH DOCTOR WHO. *dances around like a crazy person* And I've been writing porn all weekend, because everything about the last two episodes totally reinforces everything I believe about Ten/Rose, and I'm a giddy little schoolgirl in love with fandom today. I just am. :) I can't even coherently go over what happened in the last episode, because I'm too all a-squee, and there are too many ideas swimming 'round in my head for how all of this is going to fit into what I'm writing, and it's awesome and I missed this feeling and and and ( Spoiler for 2x09 The Satan PitCollapse ) MEEP.

But I am NOT in love with work because the phones won't leave me alone, and all I wanna do is write and watch CNN because OMG TEN/ROSE and OMG HURRICANE.

Wow. Too much caffeine for me, clearly. *g*

BIG PIMPING.

little_bit_foxy: The First Annual Doctor Who Kinkathon, courtesy of nostalgia_lj and th_esaurus. Such an awesome idea, because we truly need more dirty Doctor Who fic in the world. And I took a bold step forward in wrestling my writer's block by signing up. I even have ideas. YAY. :)

SO GO SIGN UP AND WRITE PORN! :)

SHHHHHHHH -- tell no one, but I am totally watching Doctor Who at work right now, and I am pretty much in nerd heaven. :)

The last few days have been busy! First of all, the brother graduated from high school, meaning that my mother can enjoy the ecstasy that comes with the knowledge that none of her children are involved with the South Carolina public education system anymore. The graduation ceremony was, of course, boring as all hell, because all graduations are. The brother amused the fuck out of me by sneaking his iPod under his graduation robes and hiding his earphones under his long hair, so even while he was walking across the stage to get his diploma, he was sekkritly listening to music. I so wish I'd had an iPod when I graduated from high school. Instead, my friends and I snuck out for a cigarette before the ceremony and then cracked the shit up when one friend accidentally lit her tassel on fire. AWESOME.

My father is safely home from his trip to China. He wasn't in Ghangzhou during the typhoon after all; his company just rearranged their work schedule so that they were in Shanghai during the storm. PHEW. However, that "phew" is followed by a "WTF", because Dad's next trip out of the country is to FUCKING SERBIA. Seriously. SERBIA. Of course, the brother and I asked Dad to pick up souvenirs for us while he was there, like a rocket launcher or some anthrax (JUST KIDDING, BIG BROTHER). BTW, I have no idea what sort of business they're doing in Serbia, and I do not want to know. Plausible deniability, baby.

BTW, wanna know why I get to watch Doctor Who at work? Because Mom got a new computer, and it's a SHINY NEW iMAC G5!!! EEEE! It is so pretty and it has a remote control and a widescreen monitor and I love it. I LOVE IT SO MUCH. So while she's at her hearing this morning, I'm stealing her office and putting together files while fawning over the hotness of David Tennant in "The Girl in the Fireplace." (I've been rewatching the entire season on my way to catching up.)

ANYWAY. So in the news, Big Honcho Terrorist Guy Whose Name I Will Not Even Attempt to Spell or Pronounce is dead. My instant, cynical reaction: "There are going to be so many photoshops of that guy's dead face." Oh, you so know I'm right. There is nothing sacred in the Age of Photoshop (see: the Hussein brothers a couple of years ago). Just like there is nothing sacred in the Age of the Cell Phone, as was demonstrated by the hundreds of thousands of people who used their Motorolas to snap pictures of the dead Pope last year.

So, in short: life is busy, but good. :)

Y'know, it'd be much easier to stick to this "post more" resolution if I actually could SIT STILL long enough to write a post.

More running today. The brother had his graduation rehearsal today, and then he had to get his hair cut, and I was actually at work for maybe an hour today. Maybe. Which was fine by me, because they were cutting steel next door. Yes, that's right. Cutting steel, complete with sparks. The sparks were actually pretty cool, but the noise? Less than awesome.

However, what IS awesome is that I picked up a copy of Anderson Cooper's book today! YAY! And I also picked up the audiobook, because who DOESN'T need six hours of Anderson Cooper reading aloud? Mmmmm, Andy. Also, I should mention that I've read about twenty pages of it, and it's already made me cry three different times. Anderson's a hell of a writer. Plus? There are pictures in the book, including a color photograph of a seventeen-year-old Anderson in Africa, and holy fucking God was he gorgeous. He's more gorgeous today, of course, but he was all tousled and scruffy and brown-haired and I have about fifty different sexual fantasies about that picture. NNNNGH.

Speaking of sexual fantasies, I came home from work last night and fell asleep at 6:00, and didn't wake up until this morning. Want to know why? Because I had sex with David Tennant FOUR TIMES in my dreams last night. FOUR TIMES. Yes, I know this means I really need to get laid, but who cares? I got to have dreamsex with Tennant and it was fantastic. Best sex dream ever. EVER.

Today's also the start of the 2006 hurricane season, so if you live in an area vulnerable to hurricanes, GO OUT AND BUY SUPPLIES NOW. I actually did my emergency shopping over the weekend, because it's such a pain in the ass to try and find bottled water and batteries when your city's in the Cone of Uncertainty. Speaking of the dreaded CoU, Dr. William Grey's forecast came out yesterday, and according to his report, the conditions are ripe this year for East Coast storms. I am saying it now: I would seriously bet my own ass that I'll end up having to evacuate this year. I have a feeling in my gut. It's there, and it wasn't there last year, but it's there now. We may not get hit, but I'd bet good money on spending a couple of days in a hotel this year. For serious.

Now I'm going to take a nap and actually set an alarm so I don't sleep all night, because Anderson's going to be on Larry King tonight, and the only way I can tolerate the horrific, zombie-esque visage of Larry King is if Andy's there to soften the blow. Or Jon Stewart, because Jon is always hilarious on Larry King. I do not know why.